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the globe



in this globe p3. o-week reports p4 + 5 your social calendar p6. what's that SCC position? p7. p-week report THE GLOBE XI - March 11th 2013

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THE GLOBE XI p3 Letters to the Editor O Week Reports We ask the freshers - what did you really think of O-Week? p4 + 5 This Fortnight The beginning of the all new FORTNIGHTLY calendar, jam packed with stuff for you all to do both in and out of IH. p6 Serious Shit You Missed This Week What’s that SCC Position? We tell you important things, like what’s going on in the world of politics and how to get political at IH! p7 P-Week Report Peng’s Ha-Ha jokes The Globe accepts no responsibility for the quality of Peng’s jokes.

INTERNATIONAL HOUSE 241 Royal Parade Parkville, VIC, 3052 AUSTRALIA

The Top Two Hello IH,

We would like to extend a most pleasant welcome to the freshers and a warm welcome back to all the seniors. After an awesome jam-packed O Week we can already tell 2013 is set to be a good year. As we herded a new cohort of confused freshers onto a sizzling futsal court, it was unclear how they would all fit into this great diverse community. However, by Wednesday’s Cultural Fest the freshers had seemingly lost any shred of apprehension as they had no fear of pelting marshmallows at the O Weeker’s faces, or dumping them with a bucket of water. In the final hours of the week a.k.a Meet the Seniors Toga Party, we saw freshers and seniors mingling and getting festive together, despite any reservations of being partially nude. The hype of O Week is just the beginning of a fun-filled exciting year to come. We know you all will be able to maintain that same level of enthusiasm throughout the year, but at the same time don’t be shy in providing feedback to help this place grow to its full potential. In two weeks on Sunday 24th March, we’ll have our first General Meeting (GM). GM is a mandatory meeting for all of Student Club (which means the whole student body) during which the Student Club Committee or SCC/IHSCC (the elected body of student representatives) reports back to and receives feedback from the Student Club. It’s also a forum to discuss any major issues in college. At this meeting in particular, we will be electing two committee positions (every member of the student club will have one vote). The positions will be Secretary, an executive position and General Member B (GMB), a fresher representative. The Secretary is required to take minutes at weekly meetings, organise GMs and communicate with external institutions. GMB is responsible for maintaining a high level of involvement of the freshers and running their own events. If you want to stand for either of these positions, you must make a one-minute speech at GM explaining why you would be good for the job, find someone to nominate you and make a 30 second speech in your favour, and find someone to second your nomination who will simply sign their name in support of you and will not have to speak at GM. The three of you will have to write and sign your names on a piece of paper, which will be used as your nomination form, and will have to hand it to the interim secretary Kyle O’Neil by Friday 22nd March. If you have any questions come see one of us. We look forward to the awesome year ahead, and can’t wait to get to know each and every one of you!

Love Mi-Gi and Bri-Bri

Editor’s Edict Good morning International House! THE GLOBE is published by Erin Moncrieff on behalf of the International House Student Club. The material here is edited but uncensored and therefore the views expressed here do not reflect those of the editor. Please share your ideas, your opinions, your ads and your skills by emailing IHGLOBE@GMAIL.COM. THE GLOBE acknowledges the Wurundjeri people as the traditional owners of the land on which International House sits. We pay our respects to their elders past and present. page 2 of 8

In your hands is the very first Globe of the year, a newsletter where all things IH are discussed at length. Bad jokes are told, fun facts are revealed and letters to the editor are printed. This edition deals specifically with that magical time of year - O-WEEK, as well as its more chilled-out cousin, PWEEK. We also publish all official IH photos from parties and events in albums on our Facebook page, so please take time to like ‘The IH Globe’ you want photo evidence for that embarrassing thing everyone says you did last night… Please note the centrefold, complete with a sexy, sexy calendar girl. This calendar has been specifically designed for your organizing pleasure, so please feel free to pull it out and stick it on your wall so you don’t miss one second of the fun going on here at IH. Alternatively, extra calendars will be available in the foyer. It is known that there ain’t no party like an editing party, so if you are interested in writing, reading, formatting, printing and struggling with text boxes, please come along to my room (GC 01) Sunday week where we will be doing all of these things whilst consuming megalitres of green tea, coffee and perhaps chowing down on some chocolate-y goodness. All input is appreciated! If you can’t make it, just contact me on Facebook or send your articles to Editorial hugs and kisses, Erin THE GLOBE I - March 11 2013

O Week Reports Three freshers share their experiences of O-Week...

Letters to the Editor

O-week was amazing. Non-stop activities, a serious lack of sleep and meeting all the other amazing freshers and o-week leaders. Learning our IH chants and being instilled with the IH pride was awesome and the best activity was easily the Magical Mystery Tour; tram cramming, our chants through the other colleges and the uni, flash mobbing out the front of Sportsgirl and doing the Harlem Shake in Fed Square. The parties were great and seeing the stares from people in the CBD as we ran around with watermelons on our head during the Amazing Race was priceless. We’re all wishing it was still O-week! As told by Maggie Greenham

This is where you, dear IHer, can write in about anything that has been rustling your jimmies at IH and we can share it (anonymously!) with our readership. You could also potentially write nice things… ___________________________________

At first, I didn't know what the Magical Mystery Tour was. We wore the same Tshirts, put the blue and yellow ink on our face and ran to the city. We sang the IH song with loud voices and hijacked a tram, then shouted 'WE WANT CHIPS' in front of McDonalds. We danced in the city all of a sudden and then went to a Moonlight cinema. I had not have such an experience before and I haven't seen people running and shouting on the street before. It was quite interesting though I had to get up at 6am for exercising in the next morning… As told by Megumi Sakai O week? I really appreciated the wake-up call with gongs, drums and whistles the other day, specially designed to pull us off bed at 6:00am (which is the earliest time I got up since I was here btw) for some “random jogging”. Thanks for that healthawareness lesson (LOL Just joking LOL). We went to the city, clashing among streets like predators hunting for preys, danced our IH fresher dance and just left pedestrians confused. I like it this way. We shared our pick-up lines and witnessed how amazingly creative IHers can be. And how the best pick-up line writer dared declare his innocence as well… What’s more, how can I forget all those theme parties? I have never expected an orientation be so vibrant and exciting as you OWEEKERs proved it can be. Well done and congratulations. And I’m truly thankful to all your work and efforts, as every fresher would be  *MUA* As told by Hao Zhong

THE GLOBE XI - March 11 2013

Stack yo plates! Dearest lovely freshers, As a seasoned IHer, I have gotten into a groove of how certain things are run, and one of the biggest examples is meal times. Not the meal itself, but the cleaning-up process. When in the washroom, please stack from the back of the trays, and don’t leave your dessert bowl in the middle of freaking nowhere. Doing it right to begin with saves the kitchen staff from having to rearrange it all again so they’re not washing half empty trays. Yours sincerely, Rant Over.

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Applications are due this afternoon at 4pm! Send queries and applications to Jenna Mi-Gi.

Everybody loves free food and free music, so why not get both in one? This week we have Barbarion: they play heavy metal, they wear outrageous costumes, and they have FLAMES!!! @ NORTH COURT, MELB UNI

7:45PM: SHOP OPENS!!! Come and get your junk-foody goodness for low, low prices! And don’t forget to work your shop shift!


11:59PM: BRAZILIAN NATIONAL NIGHT POSITIONS close at 11:59. Get your applications to the lovely JJ Wong by 11:59!! Details on Nexus signup.


March 11th - 24th

COMMITTEE) Do you like to party? Then come to AC: they party in their meetings whilst organising parties! You don’t have to hold a Student Club position to turn up and contribute (but enthusiasm for partying is strongly recommended).


5:30PM: YOGA IN THE JCR Are you stressed out? Does your soul need some soothing? Then let Erin’s voice guide you into relaxation… and some vert strange position

8:30PM: GC (GENERAL COMMITTEE) Here the Student Club Committee discusses everything from food quality to money matters. All welcome!

Some call it the ultimate form of procrasticomplaining, others report that it is 406% more entertaining than doing your readings. The CaterCare feedback form can be found on Nexus, and CaterCare do appreciate your feedback on the food! Feeling lonely? They even write back to you.



IH Tutorials start this week! Despite what you may believe, they are extremely helpful and worth your time. Plus, they’re compulsory and you’re paying for them anyway. Cheers.

More free music and food! Who will be playing this week? Enjoy a break before, between or after classes, but get in before the food is gone! EVERY WEEK @ NORTH COURT, MELB UNI



If you know what a LAN Party is, then you know you need to be there. If you don’t, then the time has come to find out.

KAME HAME HA!!!!!! Learn amazing moves like this to impress your friends and obliterate your enemies! Every Saturday @ 4pm in the JCR

Get ready to watch your fellow IHers dance for fame and glory and beat the pants off Trinity. Come along and perform the Fresher Dance alongside them and show your IH pride! $5 entry fee. @ Billboards Nightclub, 170 Russell St






FUTSAL: EVERY NIGHT AFTER DINNER Want to have fun with friends, blow off some steam, and burn off those extra calories from dessert? Futsal. Be there.

5-10PM: SUZUKI NIGHT MARKET For all those who missed it in OWeek, the Suzuki Night Market only lasts until the end of March, so head down to QUEEN VICTORIA MARKET for your fill of street food from all over the world and some pretty sweet buskers too.











If you can't attend the GM on Sunday, get your apology to Kyle O'Neil by 9pm to avoid a fine! And we all know uni students value their money!!

All those who wish to contribute to The GLOBE (we know you want to...) have a chat with Erin about your article, and then submit it to by dinner. No hate mail please!

Waltz along to Erin’s room (GC01) after brunch to help us edit the Globe! Caffeine, incense and shenanigans are assured, and you may even get the chance to bounce on Erin’s incredibly springy double bed while everyone else works their asses off. @GC01

TO DO: LATE AT NIGHT: SAUSAGE BOYZ Are you heading to Puggs for a night out? Do you often get hungry midway through a big night? Look out for the Sausage Boyz for some cheap snags. @ SOMEWHERE BETWEEN PUGGS AND QUEENS, SUPPOSEDLY KEPPELL ST

MORE FUTSAL: AFTER DINNER There is always Futsal.


4PM: MARTIAL ARTS CLUB Join Felix, Rahul, Daniel and Nick for more asskicking action. It's a great way to make friends, and then beat them up! Every Saturday @ 4pm in the JCR

4PM: GM (GENERAL MEETING) The year's first IH General Meeting! Attendance is compulsory, unless you have a legitimate excuse (eg. sleeping in or being busy fighting drop bears in Royal Park do not count!), in which case get your apologies to Kyle O'Neil by Friday 22nd. New Secretary to be elected, lollies to be eaten and fun times to be had! We promise pie charts <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Serious Shit You Missed This Week with Riley Metcalfe For those new to the Globe, the purpose of this column is to discuss one/several current news issues. The focus is split between Australian and overseas news, although the composition will change from week to week. I do attempt to limit any bias that finds its way into this column, but no piece of writing about the news will ever be free from bias (and anyone who is telling you otherwise is lying.) If you wish to provide an alternate point of view, write your own column, or write a letter to the editor. This week saw a change in Victorian Premier, from Ted Baillieu to Denis Napthine. Baillieu had been Premier since the Liberal Party won a narrow one-seat majority at the 2010 Victorian election. Baillieu’s government was frequently criticised for being unable to communicate, and his government was criticised for lacking direction. Baillieu’s government was also constantly troubled with the actions of Geoff Shaw, the member for Frankston, who had been elected in 2010. He was accused of misusing parliamentary entitlements (by using his parliamentary fuel card to pay for trips for his business,) a physical alteration in a road rage incident, and several other bizarre actions. Shaw’s actions had been a constant blight for Baillieu, and he had little choice but to appease the member due to his precarious standing in the Parliament. Early last week, the Herald Sun reported on secret tapes they had obtained of a discussion between Tristan Weston, the former advisor to Deputy Premier Peter Ryan, Tony Nutt, Baillieu’s chief of staff, and Damien Mantach, the Liberal Party’s state director. Weston had lost his job as a result of an investigation into his undermining of former police chief Simon Overland. Weston was offered a short-term job funded by the Liberal Party, while Nutt offered him longer-term employment. The tapes also stated that the government had ‘severely restrained’ the new anti-corruption commission, IBAC. These tapes sent Baillieu’s government into crisis. On Wednesday morning, Geoff Shaw resigned from the Liberal Party, sending him to the crossbench. This action meant that the Government no longer had a majority in the Parliament. Shaw also did not say if he would support the Government in votes of no confidence, or with supply. Without this guarantee, the government would be unable to function. After a crisis meeting on Wednesday afternoon, Baillieu resigned as Premier, and announced this in a tearful press conference. Denis Napthine took over, virtually unchallenged, after winning a party room vote. So, what happens now? Napthine appears to have won the vote of Shaw, meaning that his government will be able to continue governing, and avoiding a messy constitutional crisis. This is also good news for the federal Liberal party, as a Labour election win in Victoria would have given Gillard some much –needed momentum in the Federal election campaign. Indeed, Federal Liberal strategists had been increasingly unhappy about the situation in Victoria, as they need to win several seats in Victoria to win the election in September.

What’s that SCC Position? Activities Officer with Austin Carroll So...It seems a few of you little freshers don't know what the AO (AKA The Boss) does around this place. So here is the run-down on all things Activities Officer… Well for starters I organise O-Week and make sure that all of the other O-Weekers actually do their jobs and other little things that are too important for me to do, such as make menus for parties, cut lemons etc. you get the idea! 'But Auz surely there’s more than just O-Week' Well yeah bro that’s just the start! The AO chairs AC (Activities Committee) to ensure that properly good activities make it into college for all of you kiddies to enjoy. 'Hang on there bro, don't you organise all the parties for the year as well?' Yeah bro I surely do! Parties are a personal favourite: lasers, strobes, smoke…what’s not to love? Yeah true aye bruv. 'So that means you're sober for the whole year?' Nah bro, as many people saw at Commencement, alcohol is a good friend of mine. But all that aside if anyone has an idea that they want to run by me about an activity come find me around the place or pop into AC and I'm sure I can help you out. Keep it proper, Auz

Fun Facts with Susie Tindall (AKA The Queen) - Just $45million was spent on making The Lion King, yet it made more than $961million. - The Royal Melbourne Philharmonic has performed Handel’s The Messiah 233 times since 1853. - Armadillos are the only animal other than humans that can get leprosy. - Queen Elizabeth was the first reigning monarch to visit New Zealand. - The world’s largest frog is mute. - If you stayed in the exact same spot, you’d only see an eclipse once every 400 years. - Firefox is the most used browser in Antarctica. - In the Melbourne suburb of Camberwell, restrictions placed at the beginning of the 20th century determined that local drinking establishments could only be built on one side of the road, leaving the other side pub-free.

THE GLOBE I - March 11 2013

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Peng’s Ha-Ha Jokes

P-Week Report with Clifford Lee Hey IHers!!! P-week is now over, I would like to thank all my P-weekers for the awesome job they have done to make this happen, all of this would have not been possible without them. Special thanks to Tamara and CaterCare for providing much of the delicious snacks and goodies throughout the week. I hope you guys enjoyed all the activities as much as I enjoyed organizing them. The week started off with Bring Your Own Plate (BYOP) where everyone had chocolate fondue with cakes, fruits and candies.

In anticipation of the 2013 LANtroduction Event, which is going to be happening on Friday the 15th, 8pm in the JCR, this week's jokes corner will feature gamer-edition jokes: You know you've been playing Halo too much when the weatherman announces flood risks and you take out your shotgun. I'd catch a grenade for you. LOL JK that would totally ruin my killstreak.

Tuesday saw everyone put their flexibility to the test with Giant Twister!!!

Q:What does Mario sit on when he is tired? A: A toadstool

Fustal Afternoon on Weds brought the sporty side of the guys and gals.

You know you've been playing Call of Duty too much when you instinctively reach for an RPG whenever a helicopter flies overhead, and go around to get mail in case the mailman planted C4.

Brainiacs were pitted against each other during Trivia Night last Friday and everyone learnt something new that night. A Chilled Afternoon Stroll brought students round various parts of the city to have a good time. The week ended with a blast at Strike Melbourne Central with Laser Tag Once again I would like to thank my awesome P-weekers for without them P-week would not have been possible. And of course you guys, for whom all the activities were organized for. Without your enthusiastic participation, P-week could not have been this much fun and enjoyable. It was great to see freshers getting to know returning IHers and even ex-IHers throughout the course of this week. Look forward to more fun activities during the semester here in IH and be ready for the Panda Cup games to begin!!

Remember: Friday 15th, 8pm JCR = LANtroduction Event. Be there!

How to survive O-Week as an O-Weeker with Richard Toh Get excited! Nothing kills the group dynamic faster than a deadpan O-week leader, so bite through the fatigue and be awesome instead! Stay open-minded! You’ll never know what your fresher group can and will throw at you, so keep an open mind and take whatever comes your way, because ultimately, you will want to create a memorable experience for the freshers. Help each other out! O-week can be a really tough and demanding experience for everyone, with deadlines to meet and events to plan, one can easily get swamped by the sheer amount of work to do. If you find yourself with nothing on your hands, seek out an O-week leader who could use some form of help from you. You’ll never know how much it will matter to him/her. Stay healthy! We need to bring our A-game to every event so we can maximize the experience for the freshers, so keep the fresher flu blues away with OJ and vitamin Zzz! (both you will find to be in short supply) Take care of your voice! O-week can really shred your vocal chords, what with all the chanting and shouting over 160 freshers AND lack of sleep, so stock up on the lozenges and cough syrup and keep that voice box lubricated always!

THE GLOBE I - March 11 2013

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editor Erin Moncrieff

photo editor Wei Ming Seah

design team Felix Modlmayr Darcy Richardson

contributors Clifford Lee Austin Carroll

THE GLOBE I - March 11 2013

regulars Riley Metcalfe Peng Tiong Susannah Tindall

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GLOBE XI - Issue 3b  
GLOBE XI - Issue 3b  

O-Week edition! And a new-look Globe with a snazzy new calendar!