Big Open Heart

OPEN

DIANA MORGAN-BURGESS -i-

BIG OPEN DIANA MORGAN-BURGESS

HEART BIG OPEN HEART © Copyright 2021 Cover Illustration by Garfield Morgan Design & Layout by LIENO Innovations

Contents Table of

Preface Acknowledgements Introduction Part I: Living with a Big Open Heart History Matters The Early Years Connect The Dots Growing Up Healthy Health Concerns The Running Refuge Doubted Misunderstood Mistreated A New Decade The Gift Of Life Support Before You Need It Part II: Living from a Big Open Heart Wake Up And Live It Is All Taken Care Of Your Affairs In Order Just Talk About It Make It Count Art From The Heart Reflection

I

Preface

have spoken on various platforms about aspects of my journey and still I have kept much of the details of my open heart journey hidden and closed off from the world. Maybe in an effort to protect my heart or out of made up fear.

This book may seem to have taken longer to be released than many people including myself expected. In a strange kind of a way, this book has been in the making and almost like it has been writing itself over the years.

Whenever I share snippets of my journey, members of the audience would line up to talk to me and almost always I am left trying to answer the question “Diana when are you going to write your book”. Even without understanding the real truth behind my response, I often shoot off my cute response “my book is being written everyday”. I have been jokingly told by a friend that “I need to hurry up with writing and publishing my book or she will be forced to do it because people are waiting for the message”. I have tried to downplay aspects of the journey, or have shared in a way that leaves people questioning how it is that I am able to share such chilling experiences as if it happened to someone else.

So why now? you might ask. Because now more than ever, I see a world whose ‘heart’ has been as damaged as my heart was. A World where people are dealing with so much hurt, neglect and pain. A world where people are counted out and misunderstood. I see a world longing for those same people who’ve gone through so much, to find a way to heal and to begin to live more fully with an open heart. Yes, your heart might have been damaged, neglected and misunderstood as was my physical heart. Still it is possible to open your heart and to say YES, YES, YES. Yes to opening your heart even while there is still pain, yes to figuring out the lessons and using them to expand and extend your heart in service of your world. And yes to taking your place and stepping up to your role you need to play in a world that is waiting for your big open heart.

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I am not typically that person who could be accused of being a planner or one who invests the required amount of time needed to pull things together.

So, I respectfully caution you against expecting this book to flow in the way you would expect of other books.

I will be sharing from my heart and even with the skilful work of my surgeon performing what he described as “A reconstruction job” my heart is still not perfect and neither will whatever flows from it.

I strongly believe that the experiences I have had over the years are not unique to me. I want to share how I see my journey connecting with others and how we can all learn together about living from an open heart, no matter what we’ve been through.

This book is an example of possibilities, faith and miracles. It is my hope and prayer that readers tap into their own uniqueness and see beyond challenges to identify possibilities for themselves either on their own health journey, for their own relationship to faith and to the miracles that are possible when we can trust, just be still and just know.

I remember when I was being wheeled into surgery, the only message I received so clearly in my spirit was “BE STILL AND KNOW, TAKE NO THOUGHT FOR YOUR LIFE”.

I believe I went through the experiences and came out so that I can help to ignite the same faith and the same hope and the same sense of possibility in other people and that’s why I share my story.

I thank you for taking the time I thank you for giving this book a chance.

Thank you for all the feedback and guidance. I thank you for investing your time and your money into downloading this book.

Much more love and blessings

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I

Introduction f you have ever had one of those days when things moved so fast it feels like a whole year was rolled up into one. You will understand my experience on Christmas Eve December 2009 as I walked away to my doctors’ office after being told that I needed major open heart surgery. The days and weeks that followed tested me more than I can begin to explain. I did survive the shocking reality of the unknown defects I was living with. I survived the surgery that doctors said only had a 40% chance of survival. As they attempted to manage my expectation, I was cautioned that I likely would only live 2 years after surgery. Today, I am still alive heading into 11 years later. In a way, after surgery, I recall laying there in my hospital bed hoping for peace and quiet, hoping that for at least the next hour no one would knock on the door asking to come in to check my vitals, administer medications, check if the incision was leaking or to introduce another batch of student doctors overly excited to see and touch the patient with heart described as being different to 99.5% of the world’s population. On one particular morning, this student doctor of Asian descent came to my room before dawn. He did not disguise his reason for coming. He explained that he visited the day before with a group of his batch mates but wanted to come alone just to chat. By now I am pretty much going with the flow.

Although he had read the surgeon’s report and had seen my history, he was still trying to wrap his mind around how on earth I made it to this age alive. After countless questions, he said “I hope you realize that you cannot ask God for anything else for the rest of your life because you have already lived on bonus”. Similarly, after all I went through with heart issues, surgery and recovery challenges, I silently expected that my life would be easier than before and that I would be spared some of the challenges that tested my strength of character. Still, post-surgery I have had so many opportunities that forced me to grit my teeth and decide to choose over and over again to come from open-heartedness, to choose love over fear and to - vi -

constantly see or create possibilities from the challenges. It is my hope that you will find inspiration from the journey, the lessons and the blessings.

What follows is about the journey of my big physically enlarged heart.

About how I made it against the odds. As you read, there will be opportunities for you to connect to your personal journey and to see that you can make it, you too can win against the odds. You can overcome neglect and countless challenges just like I did. While they described my heart as different to 99.5% of humans. I want you to tap into and embrace your own uniqueness. The miracle of having my heart medically removed during a very risky surgery said to have only a 40% chance of survival is remarkable.

The surgeon reported that it was a reconstruction job� and another doctor went on to say that there was no medical explanation for how I lived beyond puberty or made it out of surgery alive. Maybe the power of God needs to be part of the medical training. As you read, I hope that you will ignite or rekindle your faith in God, in possibilities and also in yourself.

My hope is that the experiences I share will challenge perceptions of limitations we sometimes place on God and on the human spirit. Hope It might make you want to pack up your excuses and take them on a journey to someplace you have been wanting to go but been holding back.

I will connect how living with a damaged heart is only one side of the story. The other really important side is about how it is possible to step up and respond to a world, our world that is waiting to be impacted by our open hearts Every day we are presented with windows of opportunities to open our hearts in service of others, in service of causes greater than ourselves.

Of course, the experiences altered my perspectives and forced me to live each day as if it was my last. The truth is that every day we all live with that same reality.

It is my hope that you will not wait to be given 2 years to live before deciding to open up your heart and to live fully and totally from your heart.

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