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Martin County • August 2011

A monthly publication celebrating the active lifestyle of Florida’s boomers

Sex: Think you’re safe because you’re over 50? Page 4




Friday, August 5, 2011


Boomers need to protect medical directory themselves in many ways

Lic. # 11039

Associate news editor

This month we are looking at what Boomers need to do to keep themselves safe — in many different ways. Being safe used to mean protecting your home from burglaries and yourself from purse-snatchings and other crimes the police warned us about. These days, being safe is much more involved. The growth of the Internet has made it much easier for the bad guys to get personal information about us and made it easier for them to commit crimes from far away. In tough economic times, promises of cash sound inviting. We get sweepstakes and lottery notices by e-mail and letter, sometimes purporting to be from friends. The key

for all of this is that if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Of course, personal safety and property protection continue to be issues. Even more so in these tough times when desperate people may turn to crime to get by. Another place where recently divorced or widowed Boomers need to protect themselves is in the bedroom. For folks who have had only one partner for years, re-entering the dating scene means worrying about what seems to be arising number of sexually transmitted diseases and wading through the various types of protection you need against them. We hope that you are enjoying “Forever Young.” We look forward to your comments.

Caron Kelly of Stuart, interior designer and breast cancer survivor, keeps fit by navigating the waterways of Stuart in her spare time.


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Martin County

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Friday, August 5, 2011

Staying safe at home STUART — Domestic abuse doesn’t always involve a fist. Jill Borowicz, CEO of SafeSpace, a nonprofit organization serving victims of domestic violence in Martin St. Lucie and Indian River counties, says that it is much more than that. “Domestic violence is typically someone using physical, emotional, mental, financial or sexual abuse to gain control over an intimate partner.” For older adults, the abuse may come from exploitation by family members or caregivers. The National Center on Elder Abuse estimates that between 1million to 2 million Americans age 65 and older have been injured, exploited or otherwise mistreated. Experts agree that many such incidents go unreported. SafeSpace operates shelter in

Martin and Indian River County, and Ms. Borowicz notes that 13 percent of their clients are 50 and older. Thus far this year, there have been 67 clients between the ages of 50-59 and 15 that 60 years and older. “Domestic violence is a targeted form of violence,” Ms. Borowicz said. “It’s not violence because of stress or the economy, although they may increase the propensity. They don’t cause it. “Domestic violence is a need to exert power and control. With an elderly person, that could be control over finances. A spouse or child caregiver holds out the threat they’ll be out on the street if the victim doesn’t do what they say.” Compounding the problem is the reality that older people are less likely to reach out for help. “They are used to keeping things private and in the family,”



Safely managing medications: Seven tips for seniors and their caregivers New medication options have created a tremendous opportunity for seniors to enjoy both treatment and relief from many of the chronic illnesses associated with aging. Many of these medications have provided seniors a quality of life unattainable to past generations. However, with increased use of medications comes increased risk. Consider the following startling statistics: • Seniors average five or more prescription drugs

• More than half of all seniors are not compliant with their medication regimen • 15 percent of all senior hospitalizations are due to medication errors or adverse reactions Fortunately there are some definitive steps seniors, or their family caregivers, can take to reduce risk in this important area. Here are seven key areas of focus: See MEDICATIONS, 8

See SAFE, 17

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Associate news editor


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Friday, August 5, 2011

10 TIPS FOR SAFER SEX There really is no such thing as “safe sex.” Sexual activity of any type can put you at risk for contracting an STD (or STI, the terms are used interchangeably) even if you wear a condom. The only way to protect yourself from becoming infected is to practice complete abstinence. A person can practice certain behaviors in order to help reduce the risk of contracting an STD/STI. Here are 10 tips that may help reduce your risk.

SEX YOU COULD DIE FOR As more and more Boomers are having sex, a lack of education and communication is resulting in a rising number of STD’s and HIV

By Barbara Salter Nelson For Forever Young

A few years ago, Jane Fowler, now 76, was being prepped for minor surgery. A young anesthesiologist was questioning her about drug allergies when he suddenly asked, “How do you respond to blood transfusions?” Confused, she said, “I don’t know, I’ve never had one.” “But you have HIV,” he countered. “Yes, but this old lady got HIV through sex (not a blood transfusion),” she said. “So there.” It seemed to have not crossed the mind of the young doctor that an older person would be having sex, much less get a sexually transmitted disease. But they do – and in rising numbers. The birds do it. The bees do it. People over 50 do it, too. That’s the good news! The bad news, as Ms. Fowler first learned more than 25 years ago, is that unprotected sex — even with someone you know — can be hazardous to your health. According to a study published in the Journal of Sexually Transmitted Infections, men and women over 50 have the fastest-growing rate of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and HIV/AIDS in the country. Many of these new victims, including Ms. Fowler, don’t fit the typical profile — they’re heterosexual males and females, not intravenous drug users, and have not had blood transfusions. They could be your mother, See SEX, 18

1. Use a condom (or dental dam). Always. For any type of sex. Using condoms will help reduce your risk of contracting (or passing on) an STD. Condoms must be used correctly and consistently. Condoms are less effective in preventing diseases such as herpes and HPV, but they do reduce the risk of transmission. 2. Realize that you can contract an STD from any type of sex. Yes, we all know that you can get an STD from vaginal sex. You can also contract an STD from anal sex, oral sex, and by having genital-to-genital contact without penetration. If you use sex toys, make sure to wash them thoroughly after sex. 3. Use your condom sense. You shouldn’t be embarrassed if you don’t know everything about condoms, including how to put them on. The website www.planned has an informational video that will demonstrate how to put on a condom correctly. Remember that condoms should not be used past the expiration date, should only be used with water-based lubrications and should not be reused. See TIPS, 18





Friday, August 5, 2011



Friday, August 5, 2011



Friday, August 5, 2011


Program helps keep wanderers safe By Shelley Koppel Associate news editor

STUART — When a Palm City man with Alzheimer’s wandered off, his son was frantic. In the short time it took to take a shower, his father was gone. Fortunately, the son had enrolled his father in two programs to help the Martin County Sheriff’s Office locate Alzheimer’s patients and persons with autism or other cognitive disorders. When the son notified the Sheriff’s Office, the Return Safe system was activated. Its database searched and pulled up a photograph and details of where the father liked to go. One deputy noted that the man enjoyed bookstores, so he headed toward the Treasure Coast Mall and Borders. At the Roosevelt Bridge, the deputy picked up a signal from the bracelet the man wore. He followed the signal into the mall and found the man sitting in front to the bookstore. The man looked at the deputy and said, “I bet you’re looking for me.” These happy endings are the reason why the Martin County Sheriff’s Office has adopted the twopronged approach to finding wanderers. Sergeant Ryan Grimsdale, a

sergeant with the Community Policing Unit at the Sheriff’s Office, spoke about what these programs can do. “Law enforcement is great at collecting information but sometimes not as great at distributing it,” he said. “There’s a time delay. “With a missing person, we set up a perimeter, but it’s problematic to get out a description. There may be 50 people who fit the description. With this system, everybody has the photo and details. The program can also be used in reverse, he said. “If we find someone in the middle of the road who is nonverbal, we can pull up the description and a photo and the contact info.” The sheriff’s office also utilizes two bracelet tracking systems. Project Lifesaver is a nation-wide program that uses radio frequency technology to help locate missing persons. Each participant wears a bracelet that is equipped with a transmitter. Each bracelet has a unique frequency. The Sheriff’s Office also recently adopted an additional tool, the EmSeeQ® locator system. It utilizes cellular technology, and unlike the Project Locator bracelet, is only activated when the service provider is notified

Eligibility: Any Martin County resident who is prone to wandering because of a cognitive disability such as Alzheimer’s or autism. To apply: Residents interested in the program should call the Martin County Sheriff’s Office Community Policing Unit at (772) 220-7000.



Marjori Meister wears a bracelet from a local police department’s Wanderer’s Assist Program. Ms. Meister loves her bracelet, ‘I have several medical conditions and if I needed help, I would need someone to react quickly’. The bracelet also has her privacy in mind as it only shows her case number and the phone number to the police department.

File photo that the wearer is missing. “The bracelet acts like a small cell phone, Sgt. Grimsdale said. “The device calls 911 and gives the longitude and latitude and we go get them.” Sgt Grimsdale said that both systems are effective. The Sheriff’s Office has purchased some of the Project Locator bracelets. The newer EmSeeQ® system is more costly, running $250-300 each. Through a grant process, EmFinders, the product’s developer, gave 14 units to the Sheriff’s Office. “The drawback to this system is that while we can provide the equipment free of charge, there is a $25 service fee that goes directly to the company to maintain the call

center,” Sgt. Grimsdale said. Martin County residents who wish to enroll a family member in the program can call the Martin County Sheriff’s Community Policing Unit. After the completion of some paperwork, a representative of the Sheriff’s Office meets with the caregiver and participant to explain how the system works, get a photograph and gather details about wandering behavior. The information is only available to law enforcement. For Sgt. Grimsdale, assisting people with cognitive disabilities is an important service. “We have a responsibility to offer the highest level of protection to all of our citizens,” he said.



CALENDAR Restaurateur to speak British author and chef Pauline Tiffany will speak at the Blake Library in Stuart on Aug. 3 about her memoir, “Ms. Tiffany’s Palm Beach: Above Stairs to Below Stairs. The 3 p.m. event is free and open to the public, but reservations are requested. Ms. Tiffany is the former owner of the award-winning five-star restaurant Bon Appetite, which is now Courtine’s. She will discuss her memoir detailing experiences from WWII Britain, encounters with Churchill and as chef to fascinating Palm Beach residents including Rod Stewart. Copies of the book will be available for sale and signing. For information or reservations, call (772) 221-1403.

Local shelter seeks foster homes The Dogs and Cats Forever shelter, located at 4600 Selvitz Road in Fort

Pierce, is a no-kill shelter. The shelter is at capacity and cannot accept more animals. It is launching a Foster Outreach program in Martin and St. Lucie counties to find foster homes for animals that can’t be adopted at this time. There is no cost to foster an animal as the shelter will absorb all costs. Contact Keri Burgess at (772) 708-3764 or e-mail the shelter m

Fundraiser set The 7th annual wine tasting, Hot Caribbean Night,” sponsored by the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, will take place on Aug. 18 from 6-9 p.m. at The Mansion at Tuckahoe, 1707 N.E. Indian River Dr., Jensen Beach. Tickets are $40 in advance and $50 at the door. Island attire is encouraged. For more information, call Ken Coe at (772) 220-7980.

Medications From page 3

1. Make a list. Include all medications from all physicians. Don’t forget to add over the counter drugs, vitamins and supplements. Having a comprehensive list of all medications helps in maintaining a good regimen, assists doctors as you consider other alternatives and can save invaluable time and reduce errors in the event of an emergency. 2. Understand each medication. Why is it needed? How should it be taken? What are potential side effects? This information is usually provided when medication is received. Take time to familiarize yourself with this information when you start any new medication. And keeping this information for reference with your master list can be helpful if new symptoms develop. 3. Set up a schedule and a sys-

Friday, August 5, 2011

tem. Having a written plan for taking medications that you can check off helps avoid missed or extra doses. Make sure your schedule and your system, such as a medminder weekly pill box, match. Group medications together as appropriate, such as medications that require eating before taking. 4. Take the medications exactly as prescribed. Many medications have to be taken exactly as prescribed in order to be effective. If you don’t agree with a medication order or feel it is too expensive, talk with your physician about your concerns so other options can be discussed. This is certainly preferable to spending money on medications you will not take. If you do accidentally miss a dose or get confused don’t hesitate to refer to your medication information or call your physician’s office for instructions. 5. Don’t take medications in the dark. Take medications with good lighting so you can be sure you are SeeMEDICATIONS, 14







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Friday, August 5, 2011

Washington considering painful cuts to your benefits By Jeff Johnson Florida interim state director

At AARP, the phones are beginning to ring with anxious calls. Some older Americans are calling to ask if the rumors are true — Congress is considering harmful cuts to Social Security and Medicare as part of a political deal to pay the nation’s bills. Unfortunately, the answer is one you probably don’t want to hear: Yes, Washington really may make painful cuts to the benefits that you and other older Floridians have worked a lifetime to earn. And if you think this is about a budget-cutting plan by House Budget Chairman Paul Ryan, R-WI – or if you think the debate only affects those 55 and younger, think again. AARP Florida is urging all older Floridians to call their members of Congress and urge them not to make harmful cuts to Medicare and Social Security. To make this easier, AARP has set up a toll-free number at 888-722-

8514. Call this number to be connected to your member of Congress at no charge to you, and urge them to attack waste and fraud in federal spending, rather than targeting your Medicare and Social Security benefits. Plans for benefit cuts are still taking shape, but this much can already be said: Both Democrats and Republicans have put forward plans for arbitrary budget limits that would force across-the-board cuts to benefits if federal spending goes over a certain fixed limit. You might question whether another political argument in far-off Washington could possibly affect you. Actually, the impact could be substantial, and it could come as soon as next year. For example, if Congress included Medicare reimbursements in those programs subject to across-the-board cuts — and most plans now under discussion do, including the Ryan plan — your doctor or your hospital could see reductions in reimbursements quickly. This could have a direct impact on

your ability to get care at your hospital or to see your doctor. Don’t believe claims that today’s seniors would not be affected. These budget reductions would affect not only future Medicare beneficiaries but also those receiving benefits today. If you’re ill, you need to be able to see your doctor, not be forced to scramble for alternative care because Washington can’t wring the waste out of federal spending. Other proposals under discussion could result in Social Security cost-ofliving adjustments that make you fall further and further behind the rising cost of living. Sound familiar? Older Floridians already have gone two years without a Social Security cost-of-living adjustment. AARP is fighting these cuts. Hundreds of AARP state-level leaders and volunteers have traveled to Washington to meet face to face with members of Congress to demand that they attack waste, fraud and abuse in the federal budget, rather than targeting your

retirement benefits. Hundreds of thousands of AARP members have poured calls and emails into the Capitol. AARP is running an aggressive series of national television advertisements to urge our 37 million members nationwide to raise their voices on this issue. AARP also is mailing information on this urgent issue to tens of millions of Americans 50+. AARP’s position is clear: Congress should attack waste, fraud and abuse in federal spending rather than targeting the Medicare and Social Security benefits you have earned. As the national discussion over reducing our budget deficit goes forward, it’s in your own interest to raise your voice in this debate. Call 1-888-722-8514 to be connected to your member of Congress toll-free and urge them to attack waste and fraud in federal spending, rather than targeting your hard-earned benefits. Call now. It’s important.

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Genealogy is more than just a hobby G enealogy is the study of the history of your family. It is one of the largest and fastest-growing hobbies in the world. Anywhere there is a group of genealogists gathered for a meeting, workshop, seminar, etc., everyone is asking, “Where did your family come from? What are their surnames?”

With just a few questions, you have established common bonds with each other. When we were children, we all said the nursery rhyme: “Rich Man, Poor Man, Beggar Man, Thief: Doctor, Lawyer, Indian Chief”. Chances are, you will find at least one of each in your family tree, along with many other interesting characters. You will find it more exciting to solve the mysteries and intrigues in your own families, than anything you will ever see on TV or in the movies. These are true-life stories, and they belong to you! They can be glamorous, romantic, gruesome, thrilling or horrifying. You will be a amazed at the thrill you will receive as you discover the accounts of your




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forefather’s endeavors; births, marriages, deaths, wills, land transactions, etc. You will run into problems as difficult to explain, as they are hard to imagine. Some will be solved quickly, while others may take years, and even others, you may think you will never know. Over the next few months, I hope to take you along on some of my journeys of successes and failures, and give you hope and help in delving into and solving your own family mysteries. One of the best ice-breakers in a group of

E-mail us at: news@ FAX us at: (772) 467-4384. Mail your press releases to: 1102 South U.S. 1, Fort Pierce, FL 34950.


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Friday, August 5, 2011

Calendar From page 8

Street festival set The popular Dancin’ in the Streets festival, sponsored by Stuart Main Street, will take place in Aug. 27. The event will feature three stages with live entertainment, games, children’s activities, food and drink, a full skate ramp and more. The event is tailored for the entire family. For more information, including sponsorship opportunities, contact Stuart Main Street at (772) 286-2848.

Museum seeks volunteers The Maritime and Classic Boat Museum in Jensen Beach is seeking volunteers. The museum is devoted to the collection, preservation and interpretation of the maritime and boating history of the Treasure Coast.

FOREVER YOUNG - AUGUST 2011 Educational programs and exhibits, as well as opportunities to restore classic boats are all part so the museum experience. The Museum is rich in artifacts that span the history of boats from the canoes of the Ais Indians to internationally significant developments including the sport fishing boat, Rybovich chair and Evinrude motor. The Museum is busy this summer and volunteers are needed for the membership committee, collections committee and the gift shop. To volunteer or become a member, contact Katie McCarthy at (772) 6921234 or visit the Web site

Library system has new director The Martin County Library System has named Brett Lear library director. The appointment, which became effective June 29, is the result of a national search following the retirement of Donna Tunsoy in 2009. Mr. Lear comes to Stuart from

Friday, August 5, 2011

Portland Oregon, where has coordinator of reference, adult services and programming at the Multnomah County Library. Mr. Lear holds a master’s degree in library science from Florida State University and is the author of a book for the American Library Association, “Adult Programs in the Library.”

Ongoing •Camping at Phipps Park, located along the Okeechobee Waterway: The campground is near the Florida Turnpike and is easily accessible via Interstate-95. Enjoy fresh and/or saltwater fishing. For more information, visit the Martin County Parks and Recreation website at or call (772) 287-6565. Jensen Bookwalk: noon-6 p.m. every Tuesday at Historic Downtown Jensen Beach. Sponsored by Jensen Beach Village Mainstreet and Treasure Coast Writer’s Guild. The Elliott Museum: Hours are from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Monday-Saturday, and Sunday, 1-4 p.m. The muse-

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um is located at 825 N.E. Ocean Blvd., on Hutchinson Island, Stuart. Admission is $8 for adults and $4 for children ages 6-12. For more information, call (772) 225-1961. Florida Oceanographic Coastal Center nature trail adventures: The daily, 90-minute guided walks start at 11 a.m. and 3 p.m. at the center, 890 N.E. Ocean Blvd., Stuart. Free with paid admission to the center. Admission to the center is $8 for adults and $4 for children ages 3 to 12. For information, call (772) 2250505 or visit House of Refuge museum is at 301 S.E. MacArthur Blvd., Hutchinson Island, Stuart. Hours are from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Monday-Saturday, and Sunday, 1-4 p.m. Admission is $6 for adults and $3 for children ages 6-12. For information, call (772) 225-1875. Maritime and Yachting Museum features classic and antique boats, ship models, nautical artifacts and tools, paintings and books. The museum is at 1707 Indian River Drive, Jensen Beach, and is open See CALENDAR, 21


Friday, August 5, 2011



Be wary of some ‘free’ listing sites

See WARY, 16

“The problem is that the Internet is so saturated with bait and switch sites, the government would never have enough resources to prosecute them all. So, it’s really up to consumers to beware and be aware of the kinds of sites that are out to get their money, get their e-mail addresses or just flat out rip them off,” says Todd Drowlette, chairman of classified listing site


Like the TV commercials say, “Free is better.” The only problem with the Internet is that it’s not always free, and sometimes the price can be steeper than you’d ever want to pay. That’s the warning offered from Todd Drowlette, chairman of classified listing site Mr. Drowlette said that his research into the consumer-to-consumer advertising space on the Internet revealed a wide variety of practices that exist for the sole purpose of deceiving the consumer. “We all tend to have faith in the ‘truth in advertising’ laws protecting us from bait-and-switch scams,” Mr. Drowlette said. “The problem is that the Internet is so saturated with bait and switch sites, the government would never have enough resources to prosecute them all. So, it’s really up to consumers to beware and be aware of the kinds of sites that are out to get their money, get their e-mail address-

es or just flat out rip them off.” His tips include: •Free or premium — Before signing up with a listing site, surf it carefully to ensure that all their user listings are free. It’s common for them to charge companies for display ads and banner, but that’s only one oftheir revenue models. Many sites advertise free user listings, but in reality, only the first one is free and only after you sign up for a paid membership. Make sure you understand exactly what you will be getting for free before you sign up. * Credit card for ID purposes — Some sites will ask for your credit card information to determine that you are of legal age to place an ad. Don’t believe it. If someone wants your credit card information, it’s because they want your money, not your ID. In some cases, you’ll find an unauthorized charge on your card, but because you didn’t read the fine print when you signed up, it’s impossible to get the charge reversed. * The fine print — When you register

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6. Don’t be afraid or embarrassed to ask for help. Medication regimens for seniors can be very complicated and seniors are at particular risk for adverse reactions to medications. Ask a family member, neighbor or friend to assist with the set-up and monitoring of your medications. Asking for help is certainly preferable to the potential of a medical emergency because of medication errors. 7. For friends and family, if you have concerns that a senior loved one is not taking medications correctly, take the necessary steps to assist and protect. In some cases this may be to simply implement some of

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the ideas above. In others you may need to be more active in ensuring your loved one is safe. Managing medications correctly is a critical component of successful aging and is just too important to ignore. Benton House of Titusville holds a monthly workshop for family caregivers who are caring for senior loved ones at home. This informative workshop entitled “The 5 Biggest Challenges Facing Seniors and How Families Can Help” offers both tips and tools to help caregivers assist seniors with successful aging. Tickets are complimentary for family caregivers. For more information or to reserve your space at our next scheduled workshop, call (321) 383-2112. Michael Allard Director of Operations Principal Senior Living Group The Benton House


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The Truth About Back Pain Don't Even Think Of Taking Another Pain Pill Until You Read This • • • • •

Lower Back Pain Muscle spasm or strains Bulging lumbar discs Numbness or soreness in your legs Shooting hip or thigh pain

Having back and leg pain can bring life to a standstill. You might not be able to play golf, work, or even sit in the car for a 30-minute drive. It’s almost impossible for anyone around you to understand how you feel. You can’t remember the last time you even had a restful night’s sleep.

I’ve seen hundreds of people with back pain leave the office pain free. Because I've seen it with my own eyes, I strongly believe... Back pain is NOT "just a part of life" and something you have to live with. Chiropractic has been around for over a hundred years, and has been used to help everyone from tiny babies to the elderly. Even top sports stars and entertainers… like Tiger Woods, Emmitt Smith, Tony Robbins, Joe Montana, and Lance Armstrong receive chiropractic care. These professional athletes have the money to hire any kind of doctor they want, yet they choose to have a chiropractor on their team. Here’s what some of the top medical researchers had to say about chiropractic… “Manipulation [chiropractic adjustments], with or without exercise, improved symptoms more than medical care did after both 3 and 12 months.”– British Medical Journal “Chiropractors’ manipulation of the spine was more helpful than any of the following: massage, biofeedback, acupuncture, injection of steroids into the spine and back corsets, and ultrasound.” -- Stanley Bigos, MD, Professor of Orthopedic Surgery This means in just a matter of weeks you could be back on the golf course, enjoying your love life, or traveling again.

Is back pain keeping you from enjoying what you love to do? You've got too many dreams left undone to let back pain slow you down. Too many special moments waiting to be experienced. Life is too short to let pain slow you down. Pain is your body’s warning sign telling you something is wrong. Sure, you can numb the pain if you take enough Vicodin, Soma or some other pain pill. But if you mask the pain, it can prevent your back from healing – maybe even damage it further. Not to mention many of the pain medications available are quite addicting and can have devastating side effects. Could This Be The Solution To Your Back Pain? My name is Dr. Becky Campbell, owner of Treasure Coast Spine and Nerve Institute. Since we’ve opened the doors,

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Some warning signs of an abusive relationship

From page 3

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Sex From page 4

father, grandparents, friends or neighbors. They could be even be you.

The Big Between-the-Sheets Secret As Bob Dylan said many years ago, “the times, they are a-changing.” The divorce rate for people over age 50 has doubled in the last 20 years. Viagra and other similar drugs are helping some men enjoy an active sex life longer than they would have without them. But Dr. Dorree Lynn, author of “Sex For Grownups: Dr. Dorree Reveals the Truth, Lies, and Must-Tries for Great Sex After 50,” doesn’t think these are necessarily responsible for the significant increase in STDs for Baby Boomers. Dr. Lynn is a practicing psychologist, intimacy expert, AARP media “Sexpert” and founder of the Fifty and Furthermore ( website. She believes the primary cause is a lack of education about safe sex practices. “Our generation, especially women, still associates the use of condoms with pregnancy prevention, not disease.” Dr. Lynn cited a study conducted by the University of Indiana. “Only one in five men and one in four women over 50 use condoms. Very few people realize that if they’re in the dating scene in any kind of non-monogamous relationship, they are susceptible to an STD and the HIV virus. The STD virus can be in your system for 12 years or longer without a person even knowing it. It’s a big between-the-sheets secret.” Dr. Lynn said older people are left out when it comes to sex ed. “Unlike their children and grandchildren who received sex ed in school, most seniors are clueless,” she said. “There aren’t any STD awareness campaigns designed for them; little or no condom advertising geared to their age demographics, and doctors and family members rarely feel comfortable speaking about sexuality with these older adults.” John, a 57-year-old Ormond Beach business owner, knows exactly what she’s talking about. He was divorced four years ago after more than 30 years of marriage. He practices safe sex now, but didn’t when he first started dating. “I did have an experience where I picked up venereal warts,” he said. “It happened about three years ago. I

FOREVER YOUNG - AUGUST 2011 noticed a couple of warts and when I went to my family doctor he told me that they were transmitted through sexual contact.” John said he didn’tuse a condom because pregnancy wasn’t an issue with the lady in question and “she looked clean. I just made that assumption.”

Assume nothing Assumptions in lieu of communication can be very dangerous. “My HIV infection came through unprotected heterosexual contact with a man who had been a good friend my entire adult life,” said Ms. Fowler, a journalist turned HIV educator who was infected with HIV a few years after her 24-year marriage ended in divorce. “You never know the sexual history of anybody but yourself. Take precautions.” For four years after her diagnosis, Ms. Fowler lived a semi-reclusive life and spent time only with her family and close friends who were supportive. “I didn’t have the courage to put myself in situations that might be painful; where I might experience rejection or prejudice.” Then her son encouraged her to get out and do something positive. “I decided to take my writing skills and speak out. I wanted to put another face to the epidemic — an old wrinkled face — to show people that HIV does not discriminate, that it’s not who you are or how old you are, but what you do and don’t do in regard to transmission of HIV. Unlike some of the other diseases affecting older people, this one is preventable.” Ms. Fowler helped found the National Association of HIV Over Fifty and HIV Wisdom for Older Women, a not-forprofit national program dedicated to HIV prevention and care for older women. She has given hundreds of educational presentations about HIV prevention and the dangers of unprotected sex to audiences of all ages throughout the country. Wake up, people! There is sex after 50 Despite spending more than 15 years trying to educate people, Ms. Fowler is still not sure that people are getting the message. “I am continually amazed by the response of the general population. Even health care providers don’t think that older people are at risk because this is a sexually transmitted disease,” she said. See SEX, 22

Genealogy From page 11

strangers is asking about their hometown or origin of their surname. This will start a conversation about their home, friends or names you have in common, or at the very least the genealogist in their family— and every family has one. You will be amazed at the contacts and new friends you will make and even new relations you will find. Information you will glean from these casual conversations you have started with the person sitting next to you may become invaluable. No one and no place is sacred; strangers, old or new acquaintances, planes, trains, parties, work or vacations. A genealogist asks questions everywhere there is an opportunity.

Tips From page 4

4. Talk to your partners. Don’t be afraid to talk to your partner about his/her and your sexual health. If you want to know how many partners your partner has had, whether or not your partner has been tested, and what your partner wants to do to prevent STD transmission, then ask. 5. Don’t fall into the “he/she looks clean” trap. A lot of STDs don’t show symptoms. Keep in mind that anybody can contract an STD, so judging your partners on their looks, background, wealth or group of friends will not tell you whether or not they have an STD. 6. Limit your number of partners. Research indicates that your risk of contracting an STD increases if you have a higher number of partners. If you are going to have more than one partner, make sure to reduce your risk for STD transmission by using condoms.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Your education will take a giant leap forward. You will begin to learn history, geography, politics, religion, economics, law, learn to read old maps and legal documents, and get an insight into the customs of your people and the places they have lived. You will learn about their occupations, illnesses, finances and feuds, customs, migration, nationalities and religions. You can often trace physical traits, medical conditions and even personality traits back through the generations. I recently discovered that my fourth great-grandfather on my father’s side, was a ship’s carpenter in the year 1800. His sons and grandsons are listed as carpenters down through the years. Maybe that would explain why my father’s lifelong See GENEALOGY, 21

7. Get tested. As stated before, a lot of STDs don’t show symptoms. You might not know you contracted an STD unless you actually get tested. 8. Be careful when mixing sex with alcohol and other substances. Using alcohol and other substances can lower your inhibitions and cause you to make decisions you aren’t comfortable with. 9. Birth control is just that — birth control. Birth control methods, such as the pill, patch, ring, diaphragm and spermicides do not protect you from STDs. The only thing that can reduce your risk of contracting STDs is the condom. 10. Respect yourself and your partners. Your body is yours. If you don’t want to have sex, that is OK. Your partner’s body belongs to your partner. If your partner doesn’t want to have sex, that is his/her decision.

— University of Pittsburgh


Friday, August 5, 2011



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desire was to live on a river and own a boat. At age 30, he built his dream home on a river, bought a boat and spent most of his life “working” on his boats. My brother & sister also live on rivers and own a boats. The gene survives. I have made many new friends, and found relatives I have never known. We exchange family photos, stories, recipes, etc. I have had them give me family mementos because they felt that I would appreciate and take care of them better than other family members. Names and dates are only the bare bones of your family history. Fill in the flesh. The stories of when, where, why, and who, are of more interest than their names. Don’t be judgmental! If your mother runs off with the minister, it is embarrassing, but if it was your second great -grandmother,

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from 10 a.m.-5 p.m. on weekdays, and from 1-5 p.m. on Sundays. For information, call (772) 692-1234. Singletarian Society of Martin and St. Lucie counties: Active single, divorced or widowed folks ages 57 to 70 are invited to join. The club meets formally once a month for a buffet lunch and news of upcoming events. For more information, call (772) 398-2345. •Stuart Community Band meets every Monday from 7-9 p.m. at the Stuart recreation center. New members with some musical experience are welcome. For more information, call (772) 220- website at or call (772) 287-6565. Stuart Heritage Museum: The museum, 161 S.W. Flagler Ave., Stuart is open from 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Monday through Saturday and 9 a.m.-1 p.m. on Sundays. Admission is free. For information, call (772)



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220-4600. •Stuart Green Market is held every Sunday from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. year-round in front of Stuart’s City Hall, 121 S.W. Flagler Avenue, Stuart. Fresh produce, bromeliads, shrubs and small trees, local growers, seafood, baked goods, boiled peanuts, honey, conch, crepes, barbeque, breakfast and lunch items, beautiful jewelry, soaps, candles, sundresses, local authors and artists, Highwaymen paintings, great live music and more. For information call (772) 528-8900. •Open “pick-up” tennis: Saturday, starting between 7:30-8:30 a.m. at Halpatiokee regional tennis courts on Lost River Road. Everyone is invited. There is no cost, but occasionally bringing a can of balls is suggested. To submit a calendar event, email the information to or fax it to (772) 465-5301. Information must be received two weeks prior to the publication date.



Friday, August 5, 2011


Friday, August 5, 2011

More information about safe sex CDC STD Fact Sheets fact_sheets.htm Learn About STIs/STDs American Social Health Association “Sex, Seniors and STD’s” (AARP - Inside E Street) “Swinger Shock: Older Age No Defense Against STDs” inger-shock-older-swingers-high-riskstds/story?id=10996369 Safe Sex After 50: Preventing STD’s, Using Condoms, and More

Sex From page 18



“Wake up, everybody! Statistics show that yes, aging individuals remain sexual beings into their 60’s and 70s, perhaps longer,” she added. “Midlife and older people can be at the same risk for HIV infection as their younger counterparts, especially if they aren’t educated about transmission and prevention of sexually transmitted disease.” Like Ms. Fowler, Dr. Lynn also believes that the under 50 crowd tends to stereotype seniors. “When seniors talk to their doctors about their symptoms, STDs are often ruled out by misdiagnosis or without testing by doctors who do not take into consideration that their elder patients are still sexually active,” she said. “We need to re-educate older adults because as their relationships end or their partners die, if they begin dating and have multiple partners, there may be no danger of pregnancy but the STD risk is certainly present.”

Sex Ed for grownups Some doctors, like Neil Oslos who is affiliated with the Halifax Hospital Cen-

Recent trends in STDs and HIV/AIDS for adults older than 50 in Florida • In 2010, 21% of all new HIV cases reported in Florida were age 50+ at diagnosis. (Florida Department of Health) • The percentage of reported AIDS and HIV cases in adults ages 50 and over in Florida has increased since 2000, especially in the 50 – 59 age group. (Florida DOH) • According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), sexually active older people are much less likely than the young to use condoms mainly because they do not see themselves as at-risk for the disease or pregnancy. • People over 50 often mistake the symptoms of HIV/AIDS for the aches and pains of normal aging. (CDC) • In 2010, gonorrhea accounted for 48% of the Florida STD cases reported for ages 45 to 54; 33% in ages 55-65 and 40% of those 65 and older. There has been recent identification of strains of this STI that do not respond to normal antibiotic treatment. As a result, the Florida DOH and the CDC are carefully monitoring cases of gonorrhea. ter for Family and Sports Medicine and Florida State University’s Department of Geriatrics, counsel their patients about protecting themselves after they end a long-term relationship. “Age doesn’t protect you from bad diseases like STD’s and AIDS,” he said. Similarly, when 54-year-old Veronica, a teacher who lives in Ponce Inlet, mentioned to her gynecologist that she had met someone special, the doctor spoke with her about practicing safe sex. “It’s scary,” Veronica said. “There is a lot of bad stuff out there. I don’t want to die from having unprotected sex.” Veronica said she could have been safer when she first began dating. “I just took people’s word for it.” Veronica is lucky that her doctor would even talk to her about it. Some doctors are uncomfortable bringing up the topic with their older patients. The same is true for adult children when their parents are dating again. “While having the talk with a senior patient or family member may seem awkward or embarrassing, the need is critical to ensure the health and well-being of this growing demographic,” said Dr. Lynn. “Now that people are living longer and have been given these wonderful bonus years why do we let them become ill, or even worse die, due to lack of education?”


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131 Personals



Friday, August 5, 2011

Robert H. Fier M.D.

Board Certified Ophthalmologist

“At Fier Eye Care & Surgery Center our Doctors and staff are committed to providing comprehensive eye care and surgery to all in a manner that emphasizes quality, consideration and efficient delivery of needed care.”

• Cataract • Glaucoma • Macular Degeneration • Lasik • Dry Eye • Eye Examinations

Dr. Christopher Frey O.D.

Rebecca Grunbaum Bobo M.D.

Trained in Comprehensive Ophthalmology

Board Certified Optometrist

Kevin T. Kelly, M.D. Board Certified Ophthalmologist Fellowship Trained Retina Specialist

Easy to talk to... Easy to understand... Easy to trust 30 Years Experience in Ophthalmology Serving the Treasure Coast 1441 East Ocean Boulevard • Stuart, FL 34996 (772) 286-0007 Medicare Assignment Accepted


514 SW Prima Vista Blvd. • Port St Lucie, FL 34983 (772) 878-3437

MARTIN-FY-Aug2011 fyx  

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