Pastoral Transitions in the Age of Covid-19

Pastoral Transitions in the Age of Covid-19

Ideas for Pastors and Churches A Special Edition of The Clergy Connexion April 24, 2020

To my counterparts in other annual conferences: I would like to make this a collaborative effort. If you have ideas that you would like to add, please send them to me. I can add them to the doc and upload it to ISSUU. The good thing about an ISSUU magazine is that once someone has the URL link, they will always get the most up to date version of the magazine. So changes can be made at any time

One of the rituals associated with the change of pastors is saying good-bye. The good-bye ritual takes many forms. Usually, there is a send off dinner/meal. Typically cards are shared thanking the pastor for his/her ministry. Often times a monetary gift is given to help the pastor in the transition to a new church. Many pastors use the Book of Worship liturgy for saying good-bye. In addition to these formal rituals, there are also the informal drop-bys. The doorbell rings and a parishioner was just stopping by to say how much the pastor is going to be missed. A lot of these good-byes happen in the last weeks of worship.

It is quite likely that in many churches none of these things are going to be allowed to happen this year due to the pandemic. Even if church is back in session, it’s quite likely that it will not be the same as before. If a phased roll out is used, then some churches will not be able to even gather with their entire congregation in one place for many more months to come.

This creates a problem for churches and pastors. We need the closure that comes from these ritual good-bye activities. So it seems like we need to find some new ways to say good bye to our pastors.

The suggestions that follow are not exhaustive. They are simply some items that I feel might be substitutes for the way we normally do things.

Good-Bye/Thank You Cards We can still do this tried and true method of saying good-bye. However, we might have to be a little bit more creative. Unless you have a stack of cards on hand, you will have to go out and buy one. Many will not want to do that. If memory serves me, there is this thing called –letters. Why not share some of your thoughts. Hallmark may be pithy and emotionally balanced in the way they write their cards, but simple words from your heart on a plain sheet of paper may be more effective.

Good-bye gifts Most all the times that I have moved, I have been given a monetary or other kind of gift. One church gave the family a 55 inch flat screen tv. I am not advocating a tv as a parting gift. However, it is possible to still give a parting monetary gift. You could send it directly to the pastor. You could arrange for the PPRC chair to collect the gift. There are numerous ways to make such a gift happen. If that has been the tradition of your church, then find a way to make it happen with this move as well.

Several churches have given us framed pictures with wide matting on which messages have been signed. It might be hard to do that in our current setting.

However, is there a techie in your midst that could put together a series of goodbyes that were recorded? Most people have smart phones and could record a message and those individuals messages could be made into a bigger message.

Such a “virtual” gift would allow people to say their good-byes.

Move Day Parade This one would depend on geography. Is the parsonage on a street that would lend itself to having congregants line the street and wave and shout as the pastor is leaving. Think of it as a parade with the pastor and family being the grand marshals and everyone gathered on the side of the street—in socially distanced groups—as the crowd saying good-bye.

Post Move Celebration Day I know that one of the key tenets of the pastoral move is that when the pastor moves, he or she does not come back to the parish that he/she moved from to conduct funerals, weddings, or visits. However, in the circumstances given us in this setting, perhaps it would be appropriate for a celebration meal and/or worship service to be held at some point later in the year to offer a sense of closure to the situation. I think that such an event can be planned with care so that the new pastor is involved in helping the congregation say their farewells to the former pastor and pastor’s family.

Pastoral Good-Bye Message In the event that regular worship cannot occur prior to the move, then it might be possible for the pastor to record a good-bye or conduct a good-bye service via the electronic media being used by the church to hold their pandemic worship services. Portions of the liturgy for saying farewell to a pastor could be incorporated into this good-by video. It might even be possible for selected representatives from the congregation to be present to make the service more meaningful. Just remember to follow the current social distancing guidelines for your community in relation to numbers of persons that are allowed to gather in one place.

Saying good-bye is not the only issue with pastoral transitions that we must think about.

There is also the matter of saying “Hello”. I have heard stories from District Superintendents that the pastoral introductions to SPPRC’s have been via ZOOM or other electronic methods.

We are definitely living in a topsy-turvy world!

How do you say Welcome to the new person that has been assigned as the pastor of your church? For instance, I have yet to have a move where I was not regaled with food of all sorts with people knocking on the parsonage door dropping it off. Churches want to make their pastors feel welcomed. This food ritual is one way to make this happen.

Welcoming Food Ritual – Considerations This tradition does not have to stop. However, it may have to be modified. Most parsonages are going to be jam packed with boxes and movers on the move day.

Most pastoral families are trying to find the new normal. Children are getting settled in. Furniture is being placed. Boxes are sitting everywhere. Crowded is the word that comes to my mind. Therein lies the problem. Not enough space in the

parsonage.

What about using the church fellowship hall for those move day meals?

Most church fellowship halls have a kitchen. There is a fridge and most likely a stove or an oven. With planning, you can have a few “cooks in the kitchen” that can provide a meal for the pastor/pastoral family on move day. Keep in mind limits as to the number of people allowed in one place as you plan this.

I would also suggest, that a breakfast be planned for the next day. Use some different cooks for this meal. Talk with the pastor maybe even offer a series of such small meals over the course of the first week. This would allow the church members to show their love through food and also allow the pastor to meet small groups of church members. Such a method would require planning and the church would need to decide who the “cooks” would be.

If small groups continue to be limited well into the fall, then perhaps a weekly small group meal with the pastoral family and different congregants each week. It is a slow way to get to know your members, but it would be better than nothing at all.

Move In Parade This is along the same lines as the suggestion for a move out parade. Is the parsonage situated in such a location to make it feasible? Will you know the time the pastor is to arrive? This event will take some planning, but is doable.

Move in Assistance This will depend upon the tradition of the church. Some churches have people there to help move in boxes others assume the movers will do it. It might be more problematic to have church members assisting this year, but it could be done.

Check with the pastor to see the pastor’s comfort level on this idea.

Ideas from Other Annual Conferences

As you share your ideas, they will be posted in the pages that follow.

The following ideas come from Nancy Lambert

For pastors 

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Invite the pastor you followed to return to the congregation for a belated farewell party.

Walk through the pews remembering who sat where, and give a thank you to each of them. Have someone else present to record you so that this can be shared with the congregation.

Pastor writes notes to every family. Or might also choose to write personal notes to each child and/or youth.

Pastor goes to people’s homes, knock on the door and talk with them through the screen door. Parishioners can do the same for the pastor show up outside the windows of residents in the nursing home (alert the staff first)

For church members 

Parishioners show up in the parking lot with words of appreciation for the pastor on

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signs to hold up in their car windows as the pastor walks through the parked cars Have a card shower - People write notes and send to the pastor Write chalk messages to the pastor and family on the sidewalk and driveway outside of their home. Arrange for different people to do this once a week, or following a rain