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March 20, 2014 | Volume 6, Issue 10 | Athens, GA

www.theodysseyonline.com | @ugaodyssey | Facebook.com/TheOdysseyUGA

HOOKED AND WIRED PAGE 2

FACEBOOK STALKING: THE CYBER SIDE OF RUSH page 3 LET THE BIG DAWG EAT: BULLDAWG FOOD page 5 TINDER: IT’S A NUMBERS GAME page 6

HAS TECHNOLOGY TAKEN OVER OUR LIVES? WE PEER INTO THE FUTURE OF STUDENT TECHNOLOGY. Photo provided by: https://www.facebook.com/uga.edu


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Editor's note

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HOOKED AND WIRED We’ve all been there. Glancing over at your clock last night you can’t help but wonder: “What the hell, when did I get here, why is it so late? I shouldn’t have scheduled that 8 a.m.”

DANIELLE WEINER Phi Mu

Editor-in-Chief

Danielle is a junior studying English and history. You may contact her at dweiner@uga.edu.

It’s within the wee dark hours of the morning. You’re not asleep, your mind is racing and you’ve put off your work, yet again, until the last minute – for example, writing an Editor’s Note – with no one to blame but yourself and your unhealthy relationship with technology. We’ve all suffered from this at one point or another – caught in an, It’s Always Sunny Netflix vortex or another Facebook binge. “One more episode” our minds collectively chant, as your eyelids begin to droop and the caffeine kick fades. Alone in your bed, you crave stimulation. Ignoring signs of clear exhaustion, you cave. We all have our favorites: Netflix, Instagram, Facebook, perhaps even Tinder. Yet, shockingly. you deny your obsession. Let’s just face the facts; it’s something that we can’t escape. Exhausted the following day, the alarm blares at 8:30 a.m. and we crawl out of bed, blinded by the morning light. Running on three hours of sleep, dark bags begin to form under our eyes as we walk around campus like zombies. Dragging our feet, the cravings settle in yet again with signs of addiction including sleep deprivation, excessive consumption, secrecy and solitude, relationship issues and, above all else, denial. If you’re sitting in a dark corner with your headphones in, staring blankly at a screen you may fall into this category.

It’s a desire to stimulate our retinas, as we scroll through images for college football updates or Facebook stalk. We all do it and if you find yourself disagreeing, just remember that one of the first signs of an addiction is denial. While some of us are better at hiding it than others, I’ve noticed that there’s a select group of us that repeat this process day in and day out. Although a majority of my professors ban computer usage, I can’t help but stare as I scrawl in my notebook at the back of a lecture hall. If you don’t believe me, try crashing an introductory biology class to tell me otherwise. Hundreds of screens glow from the back of a professor’s lecture. Reminiscent of Christmas lights with varying colors and transitioning screens, it’s really something to behold. Life passes us by with the mere click of a mouse, the tragedy of our generation. We are dominated by an image-obsessed society. Social media is rampant. Although we are connected, we are also separated through the barriers of false interfaces. The tools at our disposal are incredible. We have devices that help us accomplish forms of intimacy which we never thought possible. However, since when did face-to-face contact become so intimidating and why do we accept darting eyes with texts as norms? If I could label our generation as being known as one thing, it would be connected. With lines of communication constantly at our fingertips, we seldom find ourselves alone. In a cloud of constant buzzing, when our phones fail to yield responses after a day of classes we start to freak out. When we are alone, it is unfamiliar and terrifying.We use our phones or laptops as a form of escapism so we never have to confront ourselves. We watch life pass through the lenses of fantasy on a screen, living in a world dominated by distractions. As cliché as it sounds, whatever happened to living in the moment? Turn it off. Unwind, and disconnect. After all, it’s easy to forget what it feels like to be un-hooked in a wired society.

THE ODYSSEY AT UGA EXECUTIVE TEAM

EXECUTIVE TEAM

President Poulomi Purkayastha

Editor-In-Chief Danielle Weiner

Sales Executives Dilreet Kaur

Contributing Editor Giles Wasson

Rachel Hamil

Social Media Director Alex Iscaro

Sigma Sigma Rho

Delta Gamma Delta Gamma

Phi Mu

Alpha Tau Omega

Phi Mu

Photographers Dilreet Kaur Delta Gamma

Dana Heyman

Sigma Delta Tau

OLYMPIA MEDIA GROUP 888.272.2595 | OlympiaMediaGroup.com Brittany Binowski, Managing Editor | Grant Hohulin, Designer

We want a representative from every house! To apply for a writing, photography or sales position, TheOdysseyOnline.com/creative © 2014 Olympia Media Group, LLC All Rights Reserved. The Odyssey is a private entity not associated or governed by UGA or the UGA Greek life office. The views and opinions shared in The Odyssey are those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Odyssey and Olympia Media Group.


Scene on campus

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FACEBOOK STALKING: THE CYBER SIDE OF RUSH Most guys don’t

seem to understand the concept of rush for girls. They wonder why we wake up at the crack

CELIA BOYD Phi Mu

Celia is a junior studying advertising and public relations. You may contact her at boyd3@uga.edu.

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Facebook’s impact on rush is a game changer. It is our goal, as active

members, to make sure when these girls enter our houses, we make them feel as comfortable and relaxed as possible. With Facebook, we know their birthdays, we know their friends, their high schools, we probably even know their favorite color and the name of their dog.

of dawn to curl our hair

I was one of the members who always thought rush was not going to

and find the perfect

be my thing. But it’s amazing how much you care when it all begins.

outfit, why we scream on our porches until our voices go hoarse and

Facebook stalking is a bizarre aspect of rush and, like I said, boys will

why we spend countless nights awake, praying that “Jane Doe” chooses

probably never understand it. But every girl who has spent the time

us.

blankly staring at the faces of potential new members knows exactly

Recruitment is a bizarre situation. Girls are trying their hardest to impress other girls, with the hopes that they will be seen as a good fit. However, the most bizarre concept of rush would have to be the hours spent Facebook stalking. The weeks prior to formal rush, Greeks all along Milledge return to Athens to begin what many call hell week. The process is exhausting and taxing but, by the end, it is rewarding. Facebook has opened up a whole new world during rush. I can’t imagine how hard it was to link a face to a name before social media was existent. For the active members, it creates an easier way to memorize every freckle and scar so precisely that when Sally walks into the sorority house, it feels like you have known her for years. On the opposing side, it can really hurt some of the girls who are going through recruitment. Now that I am on the opposite end of rush, I see how seriously Facebook stalking is taken. Some days of rush are spent entirely on memorizing the faces and hometowns of these girls. We scroll through hundreds of girls over and over again. And Facebook plays such a crucial role in this process. It is almost as intense as when one is applying for a job. Girls look at pictures from freshman year of high school, stalk Instagram, follow tweets, etc., all just to find out if this girl belongs in their sorority. A word of advice: take off anything provocative or inappropriate. We all had our fun in high school, but it does not need to be displayed on the internet.

what I am talking about.


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Scene on campus

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DANK SINATRA BRINGS ORIGINAL SOUND TO ATHENS

Local Athens band, Dank Sinatra, is playing April 18 at the Green Room for another original concert.

ALEX EVERHART Alpha Omicron Pi

Alex is a sophomore studying p re - j o u r n a l i s m a n d p u b l i c relations. You may contact her at abe1993@uga.edu.

Dank Sinatra started in 2010 and is beginning to see success. Touring mainly on the east coast, the band now consists of five members with a unique bluesy sound. The band said it is hard to categorize their music but, in the past, they have labeled it as “super funk” and “electric blues.” Coming into their fourth year, Dank Sinatra has three albums under their belt and is starting to focus as a collaborative band. “Moving forward, it’s very much like starting a restaurant or business,” Matt Henderson, pianist and vocalist, said. All songs have been arranged and produced solely by the band. Their most recent album, Strange, was released in November and consists of six new songs. The band has created around 30 original songs since their humble beginnings. “More rock-n-roll feel to some extent,” Joe Gaines, guitar and lead vocalist, said. He said the band is now more focused on their songwriting and maturing as a group. Gaines and Henderson are both original members of the band, which began while the members were undergraduates at UGA. The band started as a fun activity before taking off a year later. They practiced wherever they could, including the Kappa Alpha house, Gaines’ former fraternity, and people’s basements. Their first official gig was at Rye Bar, now known as The Grotto, and that’s when their life as band really began. “Within a year or two of the band starting, it started become a reality,” Gaines said. Most people wonder, however, where their name stems from. According to Henderson, the guys were playing a game of Scrabble while listening to Frank Sinatra on an iPod before their first concert. They realized they needed a name and decided to combine the word “dank” from the Scrabble board and Frank Sinatra’s last name. Henderson said the name has stuck, ever since. Athens has been the band’s home base and they pride themselves on their hometown. The music scene in Athens is an incredible place, but sometimes difficult to break into, especially for a self-produced band. “Definitely challenges with so many people playing,” Henderson, said, “You have to stick out some way or another.” He said the band is now maximizing the time in the studio and learning the ropes of the music business. Henderson started his musical career in elementary school with piano lessons. He stopped for a while, until he met up with the band in college. Henderson is also focusing on perfecting his craft on keyboard.

Gaines has played the guitar for years and started the band his sophomore year of college at UGA. He is the lead vocalist, but the band constantly works together to create their music. The other band members are Clint Meadows, bass; Josh Birmingham, drums; and Jimmy Bones on guitar. Dank Sinatra is slowing gaining a fan base and is hoping to play at more music fests in the upcoming years. They have played at the Georgia Theatre as well at the Athfest, the past three years. Gaines said the band’s ultimate dream is to play at Madison Square Garden in NYC or Red Rocks Amphitheater in Colorado. As for now, the band is looking for small successes and improvements. For more information on Dank Sinatra’s upcoming performance at the Green Room in Athens, go to www.danksinatramusic.com.


Scene on campus

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LET THE BIG DAWG EAT: BULLDAWG FOOD You’re a freshman, living in the dorms and on the seven-day meal plan. Although it’s Sunday night, you have no car, and you don’t know what to eat for dinner. What do you do? Order Bulldawg Food!

MALLORY MOSKOVITZ Sigma Delta Tau

Mallory is a sophomore studying journalism. You may contact her at malmoss@uga.edu.

What is Bulldawg Food exactly, and how does it work? It’s very easy. Simply log onto the website www.orderbulldawgfood.com and pick from one of the 85 local restaurants offered. The restaurants range anywhere from East West Bistro and Shokitini to Choo Choos and Pita Pit. You can place your order online as well as over the phone. Orders can even be customized to fit your standards. You can also pay online. Estimated delivery times can be anywhere from 30-60 minutes. There’s

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a $2.99 delivery fee that pays for the first 3 miles away from the restaurant, and an extra $0.80 for every additional mile after that. Bulldawg Food is literally your own personal driver picking up your food and delivering it directly to you. It is recommended to order Bulldawg Food with multiple people, so the price of the driving fee is split and cheaper. They stop delivering once the restaurant closes, though. Be sure to tip the driver as well, because they are driving around the city for you. Personally, since I have a car this year, I have not needed to use Bulldawg Food, although I did use it quite frequently last year. It’s a great idea and super easy to use, so even if you’re having a rough Saturday morning and can’t move, Bulldawg Food can be the way to go. So next time you’re asking your sorority sisters if you can borrow their car for dinner, just order Bulldawg Food and enjoy your food piping hot in the comfort of your own futon.


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Ideas debate & discuss

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TINDER: IT’S A NUMBERS GAME

Match.com and eHarmony may promise marriage to the lovelorn, but today’s newest app, Tinder, settles for “hooking” them up. Tinder, with its slogan: “Tinder–It starts here... It’s like real life but better,” is an app for screening, then meeting, people in your area.

ALFRED MILLS

Pi Kappa Alpha Danielle is a junior studying communication studies. You may contact him at amills@uga.edu.

Young people have found a shortcut. No more hanging out to find that special one. Instead, flip hassle-free through a pool of local online candidates to find the one who suits you. It is a numbers game, a contest consisting of an electronic deck loaded with profiles of people within a preset distance. A candidate’s photos, short profile and matching interests or Facebook friends appear on the screen. Swipe right for hot, left for not. If any of your right swipes also deem you worthy, you are matched. After both parties settle on one another, they can now tinderize their target. (Tinderize: the process of getting mind-raped with intelligent words from an attractive individual over the tinder app.) But don’t fret. If one party regrets the match, he or she can be easily blocked. It’s all very easy. If one is not interested, a swipe to the left

leaves a large, red “NOPE” stamped across the picture. Lke-wise, a green “LIKED” results from a swipe to the right. People can now be heard describing others as a “swipe right” or a “swipe left”. Sound innocent enough? Maybe. But this app is marketed to college students, folks who believe they can’t be labeled alcoholics until they graduate. Tinder has become the new drinking game on campus, as well as the new go-to for a nightly hook up. Many people find themselves devising new pre-games to work alongside the new app. For instance, there is the Five Swipe, a game in which one has to either swipe right twice in the next five profiles or take a drink. Some players choose to take a shot for every match they make (a game better for girls since they seem to find matches much easier), while others drink continuously for a duration of seconds equal to the number of similar friends and interests the potential couple may have. Regardless of the game, the underlying question is the same: will I find my Tinderella tonight? Many boast the next morning about their digital conquests. One student asked about his Tinder experience was quoted saying, “I’ve hooked up with two matches. That is all I have to say.” While he may have found success, there are others who still dream of their first magical night with their “Tinder baby”. As the app’s popularity increases, so do the expectations of where a match will lead. Tinder is a fad that may not fade quickly. It is a perfect combination of anonymity with real life possibilities. As you go to class, look around. Someone may be swiping right on you.


Ideas debate & discuss

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DATING IN THE AGE OF TECHNOLOGY

I n t o d a y ’ s s o c i e t y, technology has a huge presence. We are constantly on our phones and Delta Delta Delta computers. With a new Elizabeth is a freshman studying iPhone coming out every business. You may contact her at six months, it is hard to elizels@uga.edu. keep up with the latest technology craze. While technology allows us to stay connected and communicate more efficiently than in the past, the way we communicate has changed negatively.

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ELIZABETH SAYERS

My dad, much like any other middle-aged father, adores ranting about the flaws of our and our abuses of technology. Raised in an era where cordless phones were but a far off dream, he specifically criticizes my generation’s courting techniques. From his perspective, we fail even with our most basic interpersonal skill sets. He laughs at the absurdities of texting as well as my lack of ‘actual calls’. My usual response is to roll my eyes and ignore him. However, I’ve started to realize that perhaps my old man is actually on to something. I recently sat down with grandmother and was confronted by a drastic change in the forms of our culture’s courting techniques. Somehow, in the midst of our conversation, we found ourselves on topic of my mom’s high school boyfriends. I asked her about my mom’s dating experiences. She replied, saying that boys would call her at home and formally ask her on dates or even to the latest school dance. It made me think about how communication, specifically between adolescents, has changed over the last twenty years. Due to our generation’s cell phone addiction, I can honestly say that I feel we rarely establish formal dates.There’s always the off chance that a boy might shoot you a text saying, “What are you doing late?” However, let’s not flatter ourselves. Often times, due to an endless list of available contacts, these “suitors” treat dating with the utmost casualness. It’s a shocking truth, but these boys don’t necessarily have to make grand gestures or put themselves out there. It’s rare that you’ll encounter a boy willing to revert to “old fashioned techniques,” typically involving emotional vulnerability and investment. Today’s dating game has become a contest surrounding the idea of who is less interested. For instance, let’s say that a girl becomes busy and a guy texts her with an open-ended question. After the passage of a couple minutes, maybe even an hour or two, if a girl does not respond in a timely manner, the boy will simply respond with a “never mind.” This allows him to avoid rejection, and prevents him from forming any real personal

connections. We have learned to build up walls because of this dependence on technology, walls that cause us to be disconnected from real life. We don’t want to allow ourselves to become vulnerable in a phone call where we have to tell a boy that we: 1 are uninterested, 2 are busy, or 3 would love to go out with him! Being caught off guard is seen as less-than-cool and collectively terrifies us. Being seen as aloof is the new black, and we suffer because of it. We alienate ourselves and our generation suffers from higher rates of depression and suicide compared to our parents’, which I believe is a direct side effect from our flawed techniques of communication. We have forgotten how to truly communicate in its rawest form. Raised to stare at a computer screen, all of our communication is done though either technology or face-toface interaction. If we are interested in someone, instead of approaching them in person, we opt instead to get their number from a friend, friend request them on Facebook, look them up on Twitter or find them on Instagram. In other words, hard-core creep, which by definition is weird and impersonal. Again, we have found yet another way to avoid personal connection in hopes of achieving just that: a connection with another person. Sure, texting is easy and convenient, but there is something sweet and endearing about having a nervous boy ask you out. As a girl, I know I am automatically less interested in a guy who gets my number from a friend and texts me. If a guy in interested in a girl, if he’s serious, he should at least have the decency to walk up to her and ask for her number. After all, it’s impossible to build a solid relationship through solely texting. I don’t expect much, just a courteous smile and a little old fashioned chivalry. Not to sound cliche, but do you think things would have ended so well if Ryan Gosling had decided to just text Rachel Adams? Everyone who’s anyone knows that any girl would love to experience a Notebook-type moment where Noah hangs on the Ferris wheel to merely talk to Allie. Ignoring the fact that’s she’s already on a date, that, my friends, is what we call a “putting yourself out there”. Caring is not a crime. In fact, it’s appreciated. Next time you find yourself in a possible romantic situation, whether it’s seeing someone who interests you or asking someone out, at least consider taking technology out of the equation. I can guarantee that your future special someone will find the change refreshing. Bear in mind that the world is full of options when you stop finally hiding behind a screen.


MARCH MADNESS


10 I-PHONE, OR I-DISTRACT? The list

What do you do when you’re bored? You don’t twiddle your thumbs or play pattycake with the person next to you--you pull out your phone and use an app to keep you entertained.

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CHRIS FREEMAN Sigma Pi

Chris is a junior studying MIS. You may contact him at chrsfreeman181@ gmail.com.

Talking to another human takes far too much effort. An anti-social app provides the best solution. The amount of entertainment that is on your phone is definitely more captivating and exciting than what your professor has to say. I know we all hardly pay attention in class anyway. So, what’re are the most addicting, fun, and mind-numbing apps to keep from paying attention to everything? Well, here’s my list: 1. Instagram: It’s the easiest way to keep entertained in class…well, at least until you’ve viewed everyone’s photos. It’s quiet, doesn’t require a lot of thought, and you get to creep on that guy you like but are too scared to actually talk to him. Oh, and there’s nothing better than getting that 11th like on your photo. 2. Twitter: It’s just like Instagram, except it actually requires you to read--but thankfully no more than 140 characters (thank the Lord, because I can barely stomach reading that

many). You can tweet about how boring this class is or how classless Flans was the night before. Either way, it’ll provide you with at least 50 minutes of amusement.

3. Flappy Bird: easily one of the most addicting and simple games out there. Just tap the screen to make the bird go up while navigating through an endless stream of pipes. Easy, right? Dead wrong. Its creator removed the game from the app store because it was SO frustrating. Even though it’s fun for a couple of minutes, I don’t recommend you spend the entire class period playing it, because you could easily throw your phone against the wall in frustration or go insane. 4. Yik Yak: It’s basically an anonymous twitter for everyone in your area. Though a good idea, it has quickly become overrun with posts that only bash other people, sororities, and fraternities. If you find demeaning others amusing, then by all means download Yik Yak, because it will hold your attention for the entire class period. 5. Vine: 6-second videos of anything. Though you will have to put some headphones in, which is pretty easy to do in a large lecture hall class, this app will definitely make you laugh. With so many videos to watch and with a length of 6-seconds max, this app is perfect for our ADHD-ridden generation. And that’s my list of the top 5 apps to download if you’re bored in class, on the bus, or just find yourself with some free time and nothing better to do. Download these apps so that you will constantly be looking down at your phone’s screen and ignoring everything and everyone around you, because life is too short to not enjoy these mindless gifts from the tech gods.Oh, and please make sure to use these apps while you’re driving, because what’s the point of driving a 2 ton metal box if you don’t tweet about it while simultaneously taking a selfie and posting it on Instagram so everyone can know that you’re #blessed.


The list

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THE LIFE AND DEATH OF APPS There are few things more exciting than the discovery of a new app.

CATHERINE SCHMITT

Nowadays, new apps Kappa Delta can make their way to Catherine is a sophomore studying user’s phones in a matter journalism. You may contact her at of days, or sometimes, catherineschmitt94@gmail.com. hours. While these apps seem fun and exciting for a little while, their 15 minutes of fame can wear off pretty quickly. Some apps are worth keeping for good, while others might need that delete button. Here are some apps that are worth keeping on your phone. 1. UGA Bus App: This app can be the best/worst app on your phone. On some occasions, its accuracy can be on point. And sometimes, its inaccuracy can make you despise the bus system. However, this is a handy app to have, and you should keep it on your phone, regardless of the inconsistency.

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2. Yik Yak: This is one of the most popular and most downloaded apps, and there is no doubt that it’s a college student’s go-to app at the moment. This anonymous Twitter-like app lets people view posts from people only in their area. So it is basically a place to catch up on your university’s latest gossip. While this app can be extremely fun and funny, it also can contain some hurtful comments. So keep this app on your phone, but use at your discretion. 3. Quiz-up: This fun app allows you to compete with friends using your knowledge about a variety of topics. Anything from movie quotes to fruits and vegetables--there is a topic for everyone’s liking. This is an app to definitely keep. 4. Songza: Many people are hooked on iTunes or Spotify, not knowing that there is an app that allows you to choose music based on your exact mood. Songza gives you a range of moods to choose from, and then gives you songs to fit your exact mood. Some new apps come and go in a matter of weeks, but these apps are worth keeping on your phone for much longer than that. Although new apps become popular every day, keep these apps on your phone when you need a nice laugh, study break, or if you really need to catch that East-West bus downtown.


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500 words on music

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THE IPHONE ADDICTION

It’s the summer before my first year of college, and my primary form of communication is my Gamma Phi Beta dependable Blackberry Mackenzie is a freshman Pearl from 2007. Unlike the studying finance & psychology. You may contact her at smartphones that everyone mjr924@uga.edu. else on the planet seem to own, my Blackberry isn’t equipped with internet access, music libraries, Siri, or any other fancy app. I figure that all I really need from a phone is to be able text and call people, so I stubbornly refuse to hop aboard the smartphone craze that’s washing over western culture.

MACKENZIE RANDOLPH

My sister thought that because I had no desire for an iPhone there was something seriously wrong with me, so she decided that it was in my best interest to buy me my first iPhone for graduation. Although I wan’t necessarily thrilled about my brand new iPhone 5, I accepted the gift and gradually started to appreciate how convenient smartphone technology actually is. It’s remarkable how, in one hand-held gadget, you can access email, surf the internet, tune your guitar, make a playlist, and so much more. If it wasn’t for my iPhone, I would have been perpetually lost my first semester of UGA. I am one hundred percent serious when I say that without Google maps I would have ended up in Florida instead of my 9am German class on the first day of school.

Smartphone technology is revolutionary. There is no denying the impact that it continues to have on our society. However, in some important ways, that impact is negative. People are constantly on their smartphones, either texting or scrolling through social media sites, infatuated with what everyone else is doing. iPhones are the addiction of the 21st century. Everyone is concerned about battery percentage and data, and it’s as if the apocalypse has begun if someone’s phone somehow ends up lost or broken. Since so much time is wasted on our phones, we aren’t able to utilize that time for more productive tasks. Smartphones have put us in a situation where instead of actually socializing with our friends, we stalk them on Instagram. Instead of asking someone if they are in a relationship, we check their status on Facebook. For this reason, I miss the simplicity of my old Blackberry, but I would never switch back because I am addicted to my iPhone. In spite of all my complaints against smartphones, I think I would suffer some sort of withdrawal if I just threw my phone away. In some ways, technology has failed me, because it doesn’t provide means for people to connect on more personal levels. Technology cheats, because it allows people to communicate without actually having to talk face-to-face. And without these conversations, it becomes almost impossible for people to truly develop deep relationships with each other.


500 words on video games

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MOST ANTICIPATED VIDEO GAMES OF 2014

I realize that by writing this article, I run the risk of sounding like a huge nerd. Let’s be real, though. We are all secretly closet geeks. I can’t deny my love for video games: a veritable art form, in my opinion. It is such an exciting medium because it fuses together storytelling, stunning visuals, huge entertainment computer programming.

THOMAS WASSON

Alpha Tau Omega Thomas is a senior studying accounting. You may contact him at gtwasson@gmail.com.

value, and mind boggling feats of

They can make you feel and they can make you think (also, they can waste a lot of time because they’re so darn fun). Also, unlike movies, TV, and music, video games have seemingly limitless potential as far as in-game graphics and the power of the machines running them. They just keep getting better and better. So without further ado, here’s my list of the most exciting titles slated to come out this year. Destiny. Release date: Sept. 9 Bungie’s first project since Halo 3, Destiny shows a lot of potential. Sci-fi inspired, galactic spanning plot with gorgeous visuals? Check. First person shooter with futuristic weapons? Naturally. Completely new universe and story penned by former Halo writers? Why not. Budget on par with a major motion picture? Duh. Online play being incorporated into the purportedly epic campaign? For good measure. I guess you’ll have to wait until September to see if it is as good as Bungie claims. Titanfall. Release date: Mar. 11 After some creative differences with their publisher, the two masterminds of the Modern Warfare franchise said “screw you” to their bosses at Activision and started their own studio. That was a few years ago, and since their coup, they’ve been hard at work on their new brainchild, Titanfall. In the game, players fight in online multiplayer-only matches that take place on a futuristic battle-scarred urban landscape. Gameplay consists of skirmishes where players control customizable mechs and their nimble pilots. The action promises to be fast-paced like Call of Duty, but Respawn studios describes the game as bringing “scale, verticality, and story” to first-person shooter multiplayer gaming, incorporating elements traditionally used in single-player campaigns. Overall, it looks pretty solid and innovative for the genre. Elder Scrolls Online. Release date: Apr. 4 Personally I will not be playing this one, because I think MMORPG’s are just a huge time suck and waste of your life, but this game looks like the first true contender to upend World of Warcraft. Think Skyrim but online...and suddenly virgins everywhere are salivating. Also, Elder Scrolls online is likely to increase the demand for a few more video game addiction rehab clinics. Game of Thrones. Release date: TBD There’s not a whole lot of information on this one yet, but it’s going to use the TV show heavily as source material, so it’s likely to be awesome. Licensed games don’t always provide great incentive to make a great title, but Telltale studios has shown with The Walking Dead episodic games that they are true artists.

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South Park: Stick of Truth. Release date: Mar. 4 A send-up of fantasy games and society in general, the Stick of Truth is a turn-based RPG that the South Park creators have had a huge hand in creating. With Matt and Trey’s significant creative input into the project, players can expect a hilarious, entertaining, satirical, and unforgettable journey. The dynamic duo seems like they want to prove they can excel at pretty much every form of entertainment media.


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Humor tweets

@JukeJointJesse: My bucket list. 1. Buy bucket.

@CubanaMama82: I dunno who decided on the spelling of bologna, but it’s obvious he had no idea how letters work.

@BradBroaddus: I’ve found that nowadays most people don’t like holding hands in public. Especially if you don’t know them.

@Pmerrily: Stole a cart from this woman at Walmart today. I like to think of it as playing grand theft auto suburbs edition.

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@JulieSnark: Pepsi and Coke can’t even be @shutupheav: Yelling REEEEEMIX, when in the same restaurant together and society your boss stutters on a conference call is wants us all to get along. Pffftt. looked down upon.

@jwoodham: FITNESS TIP: Stretching is @_SetTheHook_: So, when people say “LOLZ”, important. Stretch out flat on your back. does that mean they laughed themselves to Stretch your eyelids over your eyes. Stretch a sleep? blanket over your body. @Ms612: My neighbors are drunk & climbing @JermHimselfish: Accidentally fell asleep up the balcony. Or possibly being robbed. smoking an e-cigarette and when I woke up Whatever. my whole house was on the internet. @NonCombosMentos: People who say @glittergirlD43: The Discovery Channel “adorbs” make me miserbs should be on a different channel every day.


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