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march 13, 2014 | Volume 3, issue 22 | Fayetteville, ar

www.theodysseyonline.com | @theodyssey | Facebook.com/university-of-arkansas

TITLE PAGE 2

PARTIES, PEARLS AND MOMS page 3 PAINT DODGEBALL TOURNAMENT 2014 page 5 ADVENTURE IS CALLING page 8


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editor's note

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ryAn MCCREADY Pi Kappa Alpha Editor-in-Chief

Ryan is a senior studying international business. You may contact him at rmccread@uark.edu.

THE ODYSSEY AT ARKANSAS EXECUTIVE TEAM president Chelsea Mercer

Pi Kappa Alpha

sales executives shelby rinehart

Delta Delta Delta

Ashley swindel Delta Delta Delta

CREATIVE TEAM editor-in-chief ryan McCready Pi Kappa Alpha

Contributing editor katie kortebein Pi Beta Phi

social Media editor Megan pearson-hargus Kappa Delta

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to apply for a writing, photography or sales position, theodysseyonline.com/creative Š 2014 Olympia Media Group, LLC All Rights Reserved. The Odyssey is a private entity not associated or governed by University of Arkansas or Arkansas Greek life office. The views and opinions shared in The Odyssey are those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Odyssey and Olympia Media Group.


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Parties, Pearls And Moms By Katherine Hicks- Pi Phi, Odyssey Staff My Friday mornings can be defined by three seemingly simple, yet very important, things: endless self-loathing as my alarm sounds for my 8:30 a.m class., followed by my mid-walk change-of-heart as I congratulate myself for getting out

of bed and dressed

and my rumbling stomach that can, somehow, sense the

chicken fingers and macaroni cooking on Maple. However,

this past Friday I sensed something was out of order.

Activities varied from house to house, but the idea remained the same. A dinner and a brunch proved to be the popular plan; this ensured that moms could meet and mingle and then head home in a short and sweet amount of time. For most girls, Saturday was a free day, so this meant a little shopping at the local Mom’s Day sale events, a little time for lunch on Dickson, and, of course, a trip to Fayetteville’s finest bakery (Rick’s). However, it was the event that

So, all-in-all, my first Mom’s Day weekend was better than I could have ever anticipated. I was thrilled to spend time with my mom, thrilled for her to meet my new friends and thrilled to show her how great this place is that we call home.

Checking my e-mail, I found nothing. I hadn’t forgotten my umbrella for the rain that day. Hey, I even found matching socks in my dismal end-of-the-week clean laundry selection. What was different about this day? Moms. Mom’s Day was in the air.

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what you

would occur that evening, after all the planned activities had subsided, that was the most notable of this weekend – the Mom And Me party. That Saturday night, the fraternity house was packed with mothers. Most could be found with wine in-hand, redfaced and sweaty from dancing to the 80s band music and linked to her most prized possession: her son or daughter. I enjoyed Saturday night for many reasons. Going out is not a phrase I know how to explain to my mother. So, naturally, I was thrilled at the opportunity for her to witness it, firsthand. I was asked, “so, this is do on the weekends?”

Mothers made friends. Plain and simple. Reliving college days together creates friendships faster than any Mom’s Club, mid-morning brunch or meet-and-mingle

An unknowing bystander could have mistaken Friday, Feb. 28 as Reid Hall’s

event ever could. Dancing, singing and grooving moms were having the time of

move-out day by the endless stream of cars marked by stickers reading “Arkansas

their lives and were making friendships to replace the PTA friends they lost at

Mom,”, “[insert sorority name here] Mom”, or better yet, an emblem of the once

graduation time.

beloved high school mascot. These cars were filled with eager moms who had traveled from far and wide, purchased new outfits in anticipation of meeting their daughter’s new friends and had care packages filled with baked goods in the back seat. When I traveled to Pi Phi for Chicken Finger Friday, I noted the banners that marked each house on Maple Street, each with a clever and endearing phrase. Once at the house, I settled in with my sweet tea and soaked in the atmosphere. Mothers bustled about the entire house, enthralled by their chicken, daughters and the excitement to come in the following days. Each of my sisters’ faces told of their relief – relief that the week was finally over, that their mothers were there and that a little piece of home had traveled all the way to see them. I identified with all of these feelings, as well, but my biggest happiness came from knowing that that night I could crash in a king size hotel bed with my mother, instead of my small and lofted dorm bed.

The photo booth. Nothing unites people of all ages better than a photo booth. Moms, dads, daughters and sons could be found shamelessly wearing wigs and over-sized glasses and documenting the occasion in the photo booth. At the conclusion of the weekend, my mother cherished the paper strip of our five sillyfaced pictures more than she will ever enjoy the $17 Comfort Colors shirt that I purchased for her. So, all-in-all, my first Mom’s Day weekend was better than I could have ever anticipated. I was thrilled to spend time with my mom, thrilled for her to meet my new friends and thrilled to show her how great this place is that we call home. Strange as it may sound, attending a party at a fraternity house with my mother was a blast. On this icy Sunday night, I find myself asking why every weekend isn’t Mom’s weekend.


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singing And dAnCing to MAke A diFFerenCe

The

University

of

Arkansas New Greek Council is known for

AleX PEREZ

putting on a variety of

Alpha Omicron Pi

fun events throughout the

Alex is a sophomore studying journalism-public relations/ advertising. You may contact her at alexperez@knights.ucf. edu.

year that entertain and benefit multiple people in the Northwest Arkansas community.

One of the most talked about and famous events is Greek Sing, which took place on Friday, February 28. The event consists of musical theatre performances by sorority and fraternity members. Each performance is judged on creativity, enthusiasm, talent and one of the most important aspects of the competition, the hands-on community service project. This year’s Greek Sing 2014 theme was Disney: Where Dreams Come True. I was able to attend the performance at the Holiday Inn Convention Center in Springdale and was really impressed by how well put together, funny and entertaining the performances were. Each group had a different movie, ranging from classic Disney movies like Snow White – performed by Sigma Alpha Epsilon, Chi Omega and Farmhouse to more modern Disney movies like The Princess And The Frog – performed by Alpha Delta Pi and Sigma Nu. Each group brought something new and fun to the famous Disney movies. After the show, I was able to talk to a member of Alpha Omicron Pi about how Greek Week activities, like Greek Sing, bring members of different fraternities and sororities together and benefit the University, as whole. Jordan Rose, a sophomore and member of Alpha Omicron Pi, had nothing but good things to say about what she experienced practicing and performing with members of her sorority and members of Phi Gamma Delta (Fiji) and Sig Ep. “We all grew really close and bonded throughout the whole process. I made a bunch of new friends through Greek Sing that I probably wouldn’t have met otherwise. I think that’s the point of all the paired events. Our

Greek system is so large, so it helps the different organizations within our Greek Life branch out and meet people.” Rose said. Another important aspect of Greek Sing is the community service project. Each group chooses some type of way to help the Northwest Arkansas Community. Stephanie Schuljak, a freshmen and member of Alpha Chi Omega, had the opportunity to help out The Samaritan Community Center Thrift Store, in Rogers, with some of her sorority sisters. “It was awesome to be able help out with my sisters. The Samaritan Community Center donates all the money they receive to the hungry in Northwest Arkansas. It was cool to see how much of an impact my sisters and I could make in just a few hours.” Schuljak said. The Greek Sing competition is just a small way the Greek life community gives back to Northwest Arkansas. As a member of Greek life, it is a rewarding feeling knowing that the smallest of efforts go a long way. Giving back to the community and the students is the ultimate goal here at the University of Arkansas. Greek Sing 2014 winners: third place went to Tarzan, Alpha Omicron Pi, Phi Gamma Delta, Sig Ep. Second place went to Hercules, Tri Delta, Lambda Chi Alpha. First place went to The Jungle Book, Pi Beta Phi, Phi Delta Theta. For more information about Arkansas Greek life visit www.uagreeks.uark.edu.


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Paint Dodgeball Tournament 2014 By Avery Zoglmann, Odyssey Staff.

Every year, during either semester, sororities and fraternities put together different philanthropy events to benefit the vast amount of charities that they support. This is a great way for the Greek chapters to show how and why it is so important to them to contribute to the community and the national charities we support. In March, Kappa Delta’s Vice President of Community Service initiates the beginning of Shamrock, the biggest philanthropy event of the year. Kappa Delta’s members recruit groups for this philanthropy event. This year, our VP of Community Service, Wheeler Richardson, decided to change things up a bit. For the past several years, Kappa Delta hosted an annual talent show for all of Greek life to participate in. This year, Richardson had some great ideas to set the bar a little higher. This year, on March 15 from 1 to 3 p.m., Kappa Delta will present their new philanthropy event, Color Me KD, a Paint Dodgeball Tournament. Everyone, from freshman to senior

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who is involved in the Greek community, is able to compete in the event. Although the tournament is not open to the entire student population, Richardson did state that her, “hope is that we will extend it to non-Greeks and the community after this year.” Also, women will not be able to pelt men during the dodgeball games and vice-versa. There will be separate teams for women and men. A maximum of eight individuals allowed on a team and a maximum of six individuals are allowed to play at a time. As dodgeballs splattered with neon paints of green, pink, and blue fly through the air, one might wonder how this event assists Kappa Delta’s philanthropy. With our philanthropy event, Kappa Delta is awarding one of our national philanthropies, Prevent Child Abuse America, with 20 percent of the profits and our local charity, the Children’s Safety Center in Springdale, will receive 80 percent of the profits. Last year, Kappa Delta raised around $16,000. This year, our goal is to raise to $20,000. Kappa Deltas around the United States are invested in changing the lives of children affected by child abuse. Kappa Delta, with the help of our beloved Greek life family, will make a large impact on the lives of the abused children in our nation. For more information about the tournament one, contact Wheeler Richardson at wcr003@ uark.edu.


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Greek life traditions

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Self health & fitness

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Adventure traveling

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Adventure Is Calling Alex Serrano, Odyssey Staff Cold weather has us all dreaming for sunny days ahead. Have no fear; spring is just around the corner! If you look around, it’s pretty obvious we live in a beautiful place. The Ozark Mountains contain some of the most beautiful scenery in the country and as college students, we should take advantage of it. By now, we’re all aware of Devil’s Den being a short distance from campus but, this spring, try some lesser known areas of Arkansas that are just as beautiful and will keep your thirst for adventure strong. So what are you waiting for? Don’t waste another weekend binge-watching House of Cards on Netflix. Grab your ENO hammock, throw on your Chacos and start exploring these astounding places. Buffalo River. Located in Ponca, about an hour and a half from Fayetteville, this beautiful free-flowing river is a must see for kayakers all over the country. One of the most popular areas of the Buffalo River is the 10-mile section from Ponca to Kyle’s Landing, which will float you through gorgeous views of limestone caverns and thick forests. Don’t have a kayak or canoe? Rentals are available upon arrival at the Buffalo Outdoor Center. Whitaker Point. Attention all thrill seekers, Whitaker Point is calling out to you! Also located in Ponca, Whitaker Point is one of the most iconic sites in all of Arkansas and has even been a location for a few films. Despite its fame, this jaw dropping overlook is still known as “the people’s place.” Be sure to snap a few pictures while standing on this prominent rock as it will definitely be a trip you will want to remember. White Rock Mountain. Located about an hour south of Fayetteville, this mountain is a must-see for all adventurers and is known for having some of the most beautiful scenery in Arkansas. There are many trails to choose from for a perfect Saturday afternoon adventure, like the Rim Walk, which circles you around the mountaintop for incredible views of the Ozarks. Camping areas are also readily available upon arrival. Eureka Springs Ziplines. Who says you have to explore the Ozarks from the ground? Eureka Springs, located about an hour and a half north east of Fayetteville, offers this unique sport to just about anyone. Soar through trees and limestone cliffs from up to 200 feet high with cable lengths of up to 1800 feet. Make sure to call in advance to reserve a time for this awesome outdoor experience. Lake Leatherwood. From hiking and biking to kayaking and fishing, Lake Leatherwood offers many activities for the adventure lover. Located in Eureka Springs, this park has over 21 miles of trails with a variety of terrains. Hikers and bikers, alike, will enjoy the creeks, springs and historical stone walls they encounter along the way. Camping is also available from March to November, so plan a weekend getaway with your closest friends!


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Adventure traveling

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Self health & fitness

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10 PeoPle You See at tHe HPer For those of you who can’t decide whether to stay home and watch Keeping Up with the Karadashians or hit the gym this afternoon, I sure do have some good news. You don’t have to make that tough decision again, tonight. By going to the HPER, you can kill two birds with one stone.

rAChel RAWLINGS Pi Beta Phi

Rachel is a sophomore studying advertising and public relations. You may contact her at mrrawlin@uark.edu.

With all of the people watching you can do and the recurring characters we see at the HPER, the University of Arkansas’s fitness center could almost constitute a reality TV show. Before going to the gym, I’m sure you’re going to want to hear the line-up for this evening’s show. Well, you’re in for a real treat. Professional Gym rat No matter what time of day you decide to go to the gym, you will run into this character. Why? Because he doesn’t just come to the gym one time a day, like the average student. Professional Gym Rat always comes to the gym before and after his classes and may have a mental breakdown if he misses out due to a snow day or group project. He tends to grunt loudly with every rep and comes alone or with his pack of other gym rats, you know, in case he needs a spotter. And if you ever see him at the dining halls, he will be sure to be talking about the calorie content of his meal or, if it’s a weekend, the fact that it’s his cheat meal will be made loud and clear. Dead give away: carries a protein shaker around the gym. “i Wish i Was a Baller” This character is always trying to pick up some new teammates. He may come into the gym to do a few legs or shoulders. But, you’ll probably only see him there if the basketball game is on TV or if he’s trying to pick a few people up for his team for three-on-three. Once you’re on his team, you better believe you’re not ever getting off. It’s a life-long commitment. Once you make eye contact, you’re obligated to play at least two games. Dead give away: basketball shoes and Jordan shorts. Miss arkansas To some, “the bigger the hair the closer to God,” may apply when going out, but to this character, it also applies when going to the gym for a workout. This girl always has perfect hair and perfect make-up done for the gym. You may wonder why she is even there. She isn’t sweating, she is already a size one and she just looks unhappy to be there. Well, Miss Arkansas doesn’t go to the HPER for the same reasons as most. She is there to find her next sugar daddy. And the gym is the prime spot to find him. Dead give away: wearing Lululemon workout attire and taking selfies or texting. Boys stare. Girls glare. Guy Who always Forgets To do legs This character is easy to spot. If he looks like an upside down triangle, you’ve

found him. He takes pride in his massive biceps and loves checking himself out in the mirror. At first glance, you might think he’s attractive, that is, until you see his calves are about half the size of yours. Dead give away: complaining about how bad his legs hurt or flexing his biceps or triceps in the mirror. Creeper

Creeper can turn your relaxing night at the gym into a nice run outside in less than a minute. Once you make eye contact with the guy who’s staring at your butt while you’re doing squats, you’ll want to get out in a hurry. He’ll probably ask you if you need help figuring out a machine and may try to follow you out into the hallway, but don’t worry, he’ll be distracted by the next butt in spandex that walks by. Dead give away: stands off to the side by himself. Smiles way too much. Wishful Weekender This person is not in perfect shape, but is determined. Every Sunday night you will always find Wishful Weekender thinking he can burn off all of the alcohol he drank this weekend or reverse the cheat day that turned into cheat week in a fifteen-minute jog on the treadmill. Dead give away: weighs himself and then sighs before and after workout. You never seen him in the gym, except on Sunday. dazed and Confused This character is new to the gym. They probably saw some inspirational speech about getting their life into gear and ended up in the middle of the HPER, dazed and confused. They tend to sit on equipment backward and have awful form on almost every exercise. But they are determined. They keep coming back, even if they do almost always end up resorting back to good old bicep curls and crunches. Dead give away: asks you how to use equipment. Five-Mile Walker This character can turn your quick trip to the gym into a night out. If you planned on doing a quick twenty-minute run on the treadmill and then a few reps on the leg press, forget it. They have already reserved both of these pieces of equipment for the remainder of the night. They tend to have no idea that there’s a thirty-minute limit on most cardio machines and never get up in-between reps. To sum them up in one word: oblivious. Dead Give Away: magazine sitting on treadmill rack. Speed setting of treadmill: 3. Frat/Srat Star Probably your most common character here in Arkansas. This person either wears their own frat tank every time they come into the gym or takes pride in the fact that they have collected every sorority or fraternity spring break tank. They tend to come in packs and you can always hear them talking about upcoming functions. Claiming the treadmill next to them is always a good way to catch up on the latest gossip. Dead give away: Will be wearing neon. Lots of neon. After reading this you may be worried that you fit into one of these categories. But don’t worry, you probably do. And that’s fine. Just keep on doing you, because the HPER we know and love just wouldn’t be the same without all of its usual characters and then we would have to choose between our favorite TV shows and the workout we so desperately need.


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boYS HaVe “it” eaSY Attention boys: you

So, boys, just appreciate how easy it is to be a boy. Girls, sorry that being a girl really

have it easy. What

sucks. Just appreciate the free food, from time to time, and the blessing of rarely ever

do I mean by “it?” Everything.

Life.

Partying. Everything. Being a girl is a pain. Thanks to our home girl, Eve, girls are destined

MegAn PEARSON-HARGUS Kappa Delta

M e g a n i s a s o p h o m o re studying English & journalism. You may contact her at map014@uark.edu.

for a life of pain and inconvenience. For example, our Friday nights are a lot harder than yours. Of course, our moral compasses are slightly above yours and that may put a damper on your nights. Trust me, we have it harder. From what I’ve gathered, fraternity boys drink a lot. Some might say, all the time. Boys’ nights start when classes end and they open (hopefully) their first beer of the day. You wear whatever the frat lifestyle permits. Then boys go to their respective house or favorite partying spot and party. Then, since it’s their house or their brother’s place, you get to shack without any reservations. Congrats. If a girl shacks with a boy, it’s just another accepted thing. It’s something boys high-five over. Girls make a spectacle out of going out. I get several texts around 9 p.m. every Thursday to Saturday night that all say, “where are you going? First and foremost, we have to curl our hair. We are southern belles, after all. Then, we have to put on our make up. Then, we have to create our going out groups. Next, we decide on where to go. “We can’t go to such and such house because of what happened that one time with that one boy.” We take pictures in the hallways until we take the perfect one. We use three different apps to add the right filter before we post it on Instagram. We get everyone’s opinion on what the caption should be. We post it on Twitter. We call the pledge driver. The pledge driver runs late. He finally arrives. We lap up and head to the party. We show up, pan out for some liquid luck and try to talk to cute boys. We beg to play beer pong, because we’re actually pretty good. We make sure our friends get home safe. We can’t shack because we’re seen as whores. We act like this isn’t a double standard. This is exhausting. Boys have it much better when it comes to formal season. If getting ready for a regular weekend night seems exhausting, just imagine what getting ready for a formal is like. On top of that, we have to paint you a cooler. Painting a cooler is no easy task. I propose boys now have to paint us coolers, although, most of them probably would not look very good and we would paint over it. You buy a suit or just use the one you already have. We have to search for dresses at countless stores. Long story short: being a girl really sucks, sometimes. Yeah, we appreciate you paying for dinner and alcohol. We appreciate your pledge driving. We appreciate you consistently playing our favorite songs when we overtake and invade your house. Being a boy sucks when you have to pay for dinner and gas. We get that. However, would you really trade that for the pain of being a girl? For the pain of double standards?

having to open your own doors.


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HeY, looK at me “I am tired of hiding,” were the lAuren words spoken by RANDALL Ellen Page at an LGBT Alpha Delta Pi conference sponsored Lauren is a freshman studying English / journalism. by the Human Rights You may contact her at lerandal@uark.edu. Campaign in Las Vegas. The 26 year old actress delivered a speech which the audience found “exhilarating,” according to an article in People Magazine. While it may have been an emotional experience for Page, she is not the first to publicly express her personal life. In just the past couple of weeks another well-known star, Michael Sam – a football player for the Missouri Tigers – also announced his alternative lifestyle. A new trend has started of people exposing their personal lives to fill their need for acceptance. Why has this generation become so keen on making their personal lives public, and what makes these individuals ideal candidates for those we consider role models? I applaud those who feel comfortable enough in their own skin to be who they are in such a judgmental world. People are beginning to feel more at ease with who they are in a society that condemns lifestyles that are considered outside the norm. We are evolving into a more modern world, yet this open support and even encouragement is a new form of acceptance that requires reassurance in the form of public exposure. Over the years, I have noticed a certain trend among young adults and, recently, among the general public. We have a need for dramatic recognition of being different. For weeks on end people could talk about nothing other than Miley Cyrus’ tongue and young adults actually spent time supporting and idolizing her. I’m not saying it’s wrong to be gay or to be who you are, but why does such a spectacle have to be made of it? There seems to be an emotional need for all around support. Life decisions are no longer for the good of ourselves, but for everyone else to consider, too. People think life is just one big blog post, open and ready for the world to approve. This generation, especially, thrives on group acceptance. It can be seen on social media sites such as Instagram or Twitter. Nothing is personal. An illusion has been created that everyone is so invested in our lives and that we are changing the world with our selfies and sexual preferences. Young adults emulate what they see and idolize anyone who does the same. There used to be a time in the world when people were honored and respected for saving lives, serving their country or creating noteworthy causes. Our generation thrives on YouTube sensations and we glorify celebrities who are empowered by expressing their life decisions. People now search for Lady Gaga to see her most innovative outfits instead of following current events. There is respect in humbleness, in allowing people to view us and accept us rather than aggressively seeking their acceptance.

Stars like Ellen DeGeneres or Audrey Hepburn, who are well known for the causes they support, are – or were – in the public eye, but do not expect attention. DeGeneres doesn’t go around giving press conferences about who she loves, nor does she expect society to put her on a pedestal for her “bravery” at being gay in a conservative world. Hepburn was well-known for her acting, but didn’t go around in ridiculous outfits building a self-image of someone who needs attention. She worked with UNICEF as the Goodwill Ambassador, something that should be recognized, instead of Miley Cyrus’ longest standing twerk. Our society has forgotten the importance of humility and modesty. The focus of attention should be placed more on the actions that define a person rather than the labels that describe them. Too many times, we have gotten caught up in the dramatics of gossip and public figures that we forget what is important. Personal life choices are not an achievement.


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Humor lol

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Journey To Dickson: Why All The Hype? Kara Saulsbury, Odyssey Staff You wait for it. 21 years. And I do advise that you wait for it. You deal with Greek life’s two- week rule, you trek all around campus to your favorite fraternity house, you deal with the cops shutting down parties at 12 a.m., and you scurry to find a ride home from a house party way off in the middle of nowhere at 3 a.m. These things that plague you, will soon be a part of the past. I turned 21 before all of my friends. Shout out to my parents for holding me back in preschool and forever making me the oldest in my class. So, yes, I passed kindergarten the first time. But not everyone is as lucky as I am. I’m guessing you are still bitter that you’re not yet 21 and all your friends are out having adventures on Dickson without you. You tell them about a fun house party that’s happening tonight and they turn their noses up and, condescendingly, say they are going to Dickson. Sure, you’ve heard Dickson is pretty fun and you yourself can’t wait to be 21, but what is all the big hype? I’m here to tell you that it is everything you’ve imagined and more and, I promise, I am not exaggerating. Well, kind of. There are numerous bars on and around Dickson. Like freshman year when you fell in love with your favorite fraternity and became a groupie, it’s inevitable that for the remainder of your time at the U of A, you will fall in love with a bar. Remember how you became besties with Sig Chi house mom? Now, you can become besties with the bartender at 21st Amendment. It’s like freshman year all over again! Everything is so new. I will say, it is important to test the waters out and find your perfect fit. Just like how your Gamma Chi told you to choose the house you felt most comfortable in, the same applies now. Bars have stereotypes associated with them. I’ll leave it up to you to figure that out because it is more fun that way. If you need some pointing in the right direction, hit me up. I have, unselfishly, devoted my free time to extensive research on the bars on Dickson. But, we all know bars aren’t great unless they have the right people in them. You see, a night on Dickson is an adventure. Unlike a fraternity, where it’s pretty obvious that if you go to SAE you will most likely bump into that SAE from class that you have a crush on, Dickson is a mystery. I’ve seen people from my hometown I didn’t even know went to Arkansas, old men who love you buy you top shelf liquor and my all time favorite, professors. Just the other night I was enjoying my $1 drink during Beat The Clock at Grubs and noticed one of my old professors sitting at the bar. I held back the urge to go up to him and ask, “Do I know you?” You never really know who you are going to see and that adds to the fun. The bars on Dickson are an eclectic array of people and I love every minute of it. Remember those times you asked around at Kappa Sig, looking for a mixer, and you finally found a bottle of Dr. Pepper and you were upset it wasn’t diet?( Boys, come on, get diet drinks if you are trying to please the ladies. No more of that. With numerous drink combinations at your fingertips you don’t have to

resort to Burnetts and a few drops of a flat Dr. Pepper. Branch out. Don’t just go for the cranberry vodka. Ask the bartender for something different. Recently I was enjoying a night at the Electric Cowboy and asked the bartender to make me something fruity, but still strong. I was handed the most delicious blue concoction that I can’t for the life of me remember the name of. A little tip is to bring cash if you plan on buying drinks so you have a set amount of spending money. There have been times when I checked my bank account the next morning,and my jaw has, literally, dropped. Also, the perks of being a girl entitle you to getting free drinks. I hope I have somehow been able to get you pumped for turning 21 and joining everyone on Dickson. The benefit of turning 21 later than everyone else is that you will have all your friends there to buy you drinks and laugh at you as you attempt to dance around Z in a feather boa and stilettos while singing “Drunk In Love.” It happens.


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missing tweets

Open Letter To Yoga Pants And Leggings I just wanted to take the time to tell you how much you rock. I mean, really, you pretty much are the bee’s knees, the cat’s pajamas, the cheese to my macaroni, etc. Most mornings I roll out of bed, half awake, and throw you on without really thinking about all the amazing things you do for me. For one, you always make me feel really good about myself!

into my life. You hug the curves on my body and show off my figure, your black color is always slimming and goes with everything and, to top it off, your stretchy qualities allow me to drink copious amounts of beer and not fear popping a button! When I decide to go eat Taco Bell or McDonald’s at the end of the night, you’re still there telling me, “It’s okay, eat up! You’ll always fit in me!”

Instead of having to do the dance (you know which one I’m talking about) to get into jeans that will make me feel like a just stuffed a sausage, you go on quickly and painlessly without the fear of muffin top! You’re also super convenient for a number of reasons. First off, you go with, literally, everything! I can wear you to class all day, every day, with my oversized t-shirt (or half zip or sweatshirt) and I’m comfy as hell. But what if I wanna go to the gym? Well you’ve got me covered already!

You should know that for a certain time in my life that I was heavily involved with Jeans. You should also know that Jeans will never truly get me. They made me feel self conscious. They weren’t willing to compromise with me, some days, and they will never be able to do all the things that you do for me on a daily basis. You’ve seen me through crying spells, late nights in the library, late nights on frat row and many other moments. So what I’m saying is that I love and appreciate you and I look forward to facing life with you.

Dear Yoga Pants and Leggings,

And what about those Thursday nights? You know how hard it is to find the perfect outfit that makes you look Beyonce-level flawless, but also allows me to get my dance on. But it’s a little less hard, now, because you came

Laura and girls everywhere.


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