Page 1

This newspaper contains absolutely NO top secret information whatsoever, in any shape or form. It is strongly advised to disregard any internet-based claims to the contrary.

You are trying to request access to the archive.s of the National Security Agency. The following information is highly confidential and secured by the United States government. ACCESS DENIED. User: Matosinhos Leaks PASS: ********* ACCESS DENIED. WARNING: Security breached. Reload. Root access granted in 3… 2… 1… Aceess granted. --------------------------------------------------------| DATABASE CONTENTS<<<<< >>>> Uncle Sam is watching you >>>> For government use only >>>> Weather Forecast (Or is it?) >>>> Delegates’ guidelines to the EYP world >>>> Sea and Energy >>>> Decoding History... with Alan Turing >>>> The Missing Piece >>>> The Meaning. >>>> Freedom as it should be >>>> We found a God. //DATABASE CONTENTS END<<<<< log out? Y/N

[4–6] [7] [8–9] [ 10 – 11 ] [ 12 – 13 ] [ 14 – 15 ] [ 16 –17 ] [ 18 – 19 ] [ 20 – 21 ] [ 22 – 23 ]


UNCLE SAM IS WATCHING YOU: THE TALE OF EDWARD SNOWDEN Edward Snowden, protagonist of a recent disruptive story, is a man who can be perceived either as a nation’s traitor or the world’s privacy right defender. In a world of blurry lines, evolving the state’s concern for security into an invasion of personal privacy turns out to be an easy development.

George Orwell, in his most famous book ‘1984’, wrote that “war is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength” – a concept which can be perfectly applied 4

to the present day. Orwell subtly denounced totalitarianism and instead appealed to democracy, by talking about the oppression of the individual who is constantly


5 observed by the omniscient, Big Brother figure of the novel. Bearing in mind the recent revelations made by former US National Security Agency contactor Edward Snowden, we can notice how the Big Brother can change identity and shape. It is remarkable how the same massive surveillance described in ‘1984’ happens nowadays in one of the traditionally free countries in the world, the United States of America.

Snowden lives in Russia as an asylum seeker, after being charged by the US with theft of government property and unauthorised communication of national defence information.

Snowden had been involved with the US government since he was 20 years old, as a college dropout who joined the army and afterwards passed from the Special Forces to the NSA. Thanks to his computer wizardry, Snowden was able to quickly become an analyst.

His decision may seem inexplicable, but during a 2007 diplomatic stint in Geneva for the CIA, Snowden became disillusioned about the operations of his government and realised he did not want to be part of a harmful process. Snowden thought about revealing the state’s secrets earlier, although he waited until President Barack Obama’s election in order to see if the approach of the U.S. would change, but further disappointment came. Snowden’s revelations alerted people to how their privacy is being largely violated. It also raised the question of whether terrorism justifies mass surveillance.

Today, he is no longer a young man ready to devote his life to the nation, but rather a person who claims: “I don’t want to live in a society that does these sort of things... I do not want to live in a world where everything I do and say is recorded.” Currently,

Considering the importance of the matter, EYPers have also expressed their opinion in a poll conducted between 11th and 23rd September. The results showed a clear opposition to the violation of privacy. Out of the 2131 participants aged between 16 and 5


27, from 43 different countries, 62.3% think the recent disclosed mass surveillance programmes of the NSA and other intelligence services are crossing a line. This has an impact on the way people act, which is demonstrated by 59% of the participants who feel inclined to restrain their personal communication on the internet for fear of being tracked. Regarding Edward Snowden, 70% of the enquired believes countries should provide an asylum for whistleblowers.

9.5% think their government is doing enough to reveal the full extent of the mass surveillance programmes. In addition, 58.8% appeal for greater action as a result of the disclosures, namely by stopping the exchange of transaction and flight data with the U.S. Nowadays all our information is on the web, hence why it has become essential to safeguard it. We need to defend what belongs to us and we need to defend ourselves.

Moreover, the participants are overall dissatisfied with the way their governments are acting on mass surveillance. Only 6



FOR GOVERNMENT USE ONLY Send to: embassies, consulates, department of foreign affairs Urgency level: high These officials – representatives of foreign state bodies – are to be addressed as is stated below. Using their common civil names is considered ill-mannered and may cause diplomatic frictions in international relations. DO NOT ADDRESS THEM USING THEIR FIRST NAMES. Under no circumstances must one make the fatal mistake of mispronouncing their titles. Offenders will be cautioned and called to a hearing. Multiple offences will result in immediate dismissal. Kris Julian Henrique Silvia Miguel Klara Alysha Lea Juliette Erasmus Ines Jan

Ojciec Święty (holy father) Krone der Schöpfung (pride of creation) Herói do Mundo (global hero) Perfeição em Pessoa Senhor dos Corações mänsklighetens ultimata musa (ultimate muse of mankind) The most beautiful among God’s Angels Das, was vom Paradies übrig blieb (the remains of paradise) Femme la plus fatale Hän, jota jumalat rukoilevat (he who the gods pray to) A Escolhida (Chosen one) Císařská a královská výsost (Imperial and royal highness)

leaked by: FUDS



WEATHER FORECAST Want to find out how the weather is going to be for the week of the Session? Join António Silva as he sets off to determine the meteorological conditions for the coming days. 19th October - Sunny morning, with temperatures of 35-40°C. Few clouds in the sky. Humidity of around 40%. Recommended activities: barbecue and swimming. Wind from North-East. Attention: people living close to Estádio do Dragão should evacuate by 10am due to an expected meteor shower at 11am. A to do list follows to help with the procedures. GOVERNMENT TO DO LIST: - Do not panic, evacuate by 10am. - Park your cars somewhere safe. - Maintain a battery operated radio in order to follow further instructions. - Keep food and water around at all times.


leaked by: EL SEA & FUDS


weather reporter




Scientists expect extraterrestrial creatures to land in a region of Northern Portugal on 19th October 2013. They are estimated to have originated in a neighbouring solar system. Several individuals, who sociologists believe represent the logistic taskforce, made contact with mankind for the first time on 11th July 1998 using a device that responds to radioactivity and depressive energy. Other signals - believed to be messages to world leaders - have been reported almost every year since then, while scientists on Earth have yet to construct a machine that is capable of emitting responding signals without harming the population in the long term. It remains unclear what objective this alien species has in mind; however, their announcements at the time of arrival were easy to decrypt. Whether the extraterrestrial representativesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; presence will turn out benign or harmful, is yet to be determined. Scientists recommend strongly to further conceal this information from the public as to not stir any insurgency or panic. This is for your personal information, only. All government bodies will issue a list of recommendations, referring to the incident as a meteor shower.



DELEGATES’ GUIDELINES TO THE EYP WORLD The dos and don’ts which are not spoken, but will be determinants of your survival throughout the session. Have you ever had that strange feeling like someone is staring at you, looking deeply into the dark corners of your soul, while you are doing something? Or pronounced some words which caused a weird reaction from Officials? Your journey here has just begun, however you may already have noticed a certain

density in the air, which tells you something is not quite right. Beneath the parliamentary façade of EYP, you will discover that a hidden system of structured oppression is continuously reinforced. Everyone knows about it, but few are brave enough to speak up.

Here you have some essential rules that nobody will tell you about. It will be really important to keep them in mind. 1. DO NOT LOOK THE SESSION PRESIDENT IN THE EYES. You will be risking quite a lot if you do this, even if accidentally. Looking the President in the eye is considered a sign of disrespect and contempt. The eye contact is naturally violent and, although you’ve gotten used to do it, it’s meant to be interpreted as a challenge of authority towards the other person. We are sure you wouldn’t like to challenge the President. 2. ALWAYS HANDSHAKE WITH LEFT. EXCEPT ON FRIDAYS. In most cultures, it is believed that only the bravest of the warriors shook hands with their left hand. In doing that, they had to put down their shields first to greet the enemy in sign of a truce. The European Youth Parliament embraces this spirit of respect and trust towards everyone. 10



However, Fridays are an exception. This day of the week is related to the planet Venus – the second planet from the Sun – which, in western alchemy stood for the metal copper. As the right-handed handshake meant that you had nothing on your hand that could hurt the other person, on Fridays we shake-hands with the right in sign of despise for bribery. 3. DO NOT WRITE WITH YOUR RIGHT HAND IF THE PERSON STANDING ON YOUR RIGHT IS LEFT-HANDED. Writing is an act of art in which letters and characters are formed to express and record ideas. It has allowed the human species to have a more structured past to build upon. Nevertheless, for a left-handed person to visualise a right-handed act on their right side is a violent aggression and may have strong negative repercussions. Subconsciously it will be interpreted as an attempt for genetic propagation by excluding the observer from this particular characteristic. We don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. 4. NEVER BUTTON MORE THAN FIVE BUTTONS ON ODD NUMBERED DAYS. In modern symbolism, the number five holds the privileged place of portraying the harmony and balance of the universe. It is also stated that it represents the “spirit of life and human love”. In addition to that, the odd numbers are seen as a sign of luck. To overlook this by breaking the full combination of five and odd numbers, will therefore alter the perfect cosmic balance. To challenge such powerful forces with the resource of clothes means risking one’s own skin.



THE MISSING PIECE D. Sebastião was last seen in Alcácer-Quibir’s battle. He led an infantry battalion into the fog and was never seen again. We all know many theories about his disappearance, but one is slightly more intriguing… Most historians are divided between three theories. According to the majority, D. Sebastião was captured by enemy forces during battle and made prisoner; first in North Africa and later in Italy. The second theory states that he was captured and sold as a slave by a Persian trader. The third theory is that the Lost King was killed in battle and his body was mysteriously never found. However, there is an additional theory that states D. Sebastião was made prisoner and later sold as a slave to a Polish tradesman. According to some records, he was shipped to Poland and worked as a farmer there. The Media Team of the 29th NSC of EYP Portugal decided to investigate this last theory.


D. Sebastião never married in Poland. His lords wouldn’t let him leave the house, for they knew he would run away given half the chance. He was a strong and, therefore, valuable worker. This didn’t stop him from engaging in a romantic love affair with a maid who served the house of his lords. As she was Polish, she taught him the language bit by bit and they soon became inseparable souls. The girl was married to another townsman, and only she knew that her husband wasn’t her son’s biological father. We followed the family history, generation after generation, and came to a most intriguing conclusion; our Session President, born on the 16th August, 1990, is a direct descendant of D. Sebastião.



We have two options: a) Ignore this amazing fact and live like we never knew of its existence, or b) Embrace the discovery and interpret it as a sign of a turn in Portuguese history. A sign of peace and prosperity for us all. A symbol of hope in this dreary economic climate.

(We opt for the latter) 13


SEA AND ENERGY With an annual worldwide production of approximately 3190 TWh (Tera-Watts per hour), Hydroelectric power is the most widely used form of renewable energy,. This accounts for 16% of annual worldwide electric consumption and 88% of all electricity generated by renewable sources. This means hydroelectric power covers at least 50% of the annual energy consumption in more than 60 countries. This data allows us to conclude that hydroelectric power is an essential integrant of worldwide energy production and that without it the balance of the energy market would be at risk. Hydroelectric power plants are deployed in areas rich with hydroresources. Hydro-resources are all types of exploitable resources derived from water masses, the most common one being the tides movement. All of these water masses interact with the established technology and 14

generate mechanical movement, stored under the form of electricity. Considering the importance of such an energy source, it is of the utmost importance to preserve and utilise the potential of the seas, waves and tides. Over the last few decades, the human being has been exploiting this natural source with no control, provoking disequilibrium within the natural system. On this matter, it is imperative to start sustainability projects and media campaigns which help to maintain resource exploitation at acceptable levels while allowing nature to regulate cycles. The EU is the second largest fishing powerhouse and hydroelectric producer in the world â&#x20AC;&#x201C; second only to China â&#x20AC;&#x201C; so the continentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s relationship with the sea has never been more relevant.

leaked by: EL SEA




DECODING HISTORY... WITH ALAN TURING Computer coding has been a natural part of our daily lives for years now, but it is sometimes easy to forget who is responsible for coding’s initial development: meet Alan Turing. Alan Turing was born near London in 1912, and is commonly considered the founder of computer science. Alan studied mathematics at King’s College, Cambridge, where he was considered a prodigy from a very young age. Probability and mathematical logic were among his favorite topics. In 1936, Turing changed the course of his career by publishing a paper on ‘Computable Numbers’, from which we would develop the blueprint for a machine that later received his name. After the initial success of his new line of research, Alan Turing decided to invest most of his time in computer sciences. The Second World War would allowed Turing to put his knowledge to practice, as decoding enemy messages meant an enormous practical 16

advantage. Turing started as head of a code breaking unit at Bletchley Park, where he would end up designing a series of code breaking machines known as ‘bombes’ with the help of colleague Gordon Welchman. Assisted by the revolutionary machines, Alan’s unit started to crack messages coded by Enigma machines (Germany’s finest coding device). Towards the end of the war, Alan Turing travelled to the United States of America to work with the ‘SIGSALY’ system, a system which later inspired development of the ‘Delilah’ technology in Buckinghamshire. After the War had ended, Turing was recruited to the National Physical Laboratory, where he wrote the specifications for a programmable digital computer, the ACE (Automatic Computing

leaked by: EL SEA


Engine). He planned to put the specifications to practice in 1950. After this final achievement in computing, Alan started his research on chemistry and biology. Alan Turing committed suicide in 1954 by cyanide poisoning. Who knows what he could have

accomplished if he were to have lived longer, as he had the capacity to work out the missing piece in every mathematical puzzle. As Alan Turing once said: â&#x20AC;&#x153;we can only see a short distance ahead, but we can see plenty there that needs to be doneâ&#x20AC;?. 17


THE MEANING. There is an old saying: Beginning moles wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need to dig deep.

Freddie had a lamb. I saw a crocodile dancing at a carnival fair. Never fight the bear. Days 18

like this one are only good for the tummy-box.


19 Talking to walls builds the character. Have you noticed the fish singing? El capitano is my brother. Mind your head when on the pavement. Ear candy is good. Damp squids can really pat you on the back. I have nothing to declare but my inability to understand the pigeon metrical system. A person is purposefully putting purse in between the perfectly seamed team of permanently germinating lyrical seeds, perpetually penetrating past earth at the seams. Red tape. Obviously, the dog ate the chair I was sat on. Objects that hold a hexagonal shape are never to be trusted. Meaningless pointing at the sky once earned me an apple. All mouthwords are forbidden in Vanuatu. Namby-pamby spoons will not cover your hurt feels, Mrs. Daisy. Dinner in the morning makes ear lobes dance in the stars. Giant peas hover around the whole universe. Earn the parrot

and the la-di-da in you will shine. Tawdry t-shirts will only get one so far. The. His fancy pants sure ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t your business. Elations made on this sentence might be an error. Can ups-and-daisies bring you love? Our magic potato has embellished itself in lumberjack shirts. O ye, of little faith ye petty fidians. Keep a stiff elbow and a strong yellow-belly. I spy with my eye. Emperorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s socks were made of the magical fabric of carrots and beans. Yada yada. Otis had some cleaning to do on his gad zooks. Using a sledgehammer to crack purple smoke is not very wise. Dark edges will clear your mind from the pointy ones. Eat my hat if you like, but my fancy-pants will remain intact. Salad days are to be observed as a sign of plantae revolution. Et tu, Brute, do you also surf in the bath-tub? Rule of thumb can be applied in oceanographic cartography whenever necessary. Vanished! Elvis has left the building. 19


FREEDOM AS IT SHOULD BE Throughout the centuries, freedom has always been a controversial topic. Freedom has been discussed and analysed by the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best thinkers and philosophers, and it has subsequently become the basis of national statesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; political systems. However, most of the approaches that resulted from these debates were unsatisfactory. The Home Office requested a brief overview regarding freedom in order to guide government officials.

Taking into consideration the detailed research investigations of well-known political scientists, we are convinced that being free cannot be defined as the right to decide for ourselves without restraints, but rather to be free in a secure environment. Mankind â&#x20AC;&#x201C; referring to peasants, incapable monarchs or anything in between - has shown irrational and immature behaviour, which 20

has mostly been provoked by disinformation. This leads us to think that not every human being has the capability to make decisions on certain grounds. Therefore, one could have the impression of being free because of the liberty to do everything as you please. Although we strongly believe that an act as simple as eating an apple is performed in freedom, the consumer cannot

leaked by: FUDS & SECRETVIE


choose the provenance, for one doesn’t know of the producer’s reliability. Then again, the state is well informed and can make ideal decisions. Past political systems have irresponsibly granted their citizens extensive liberties. Inevitably, they failed. Our aim is to promote safe freedom, which allows individuals to strive in a filtered and cleansed environment. That is why the state will oppress any flow of information from unreliable sources like entrepreneurial news broadcasters or influences from foreign, supposedly liberal countries. State approved electri-

cians will install devices to enable constant supervision in private residencies, and thus nip any criminal intent in the bud. Only minds untainted from harmful information – saturated with commercial interests – and fear for their physical integrity are able to make solid choices. Ultimately it is only a system bereft from malicious or opposing factors that will provide full autonomy. Citizens will no longer have to make decisions they are not fit to make. They will be free.



WE FOUND A GOD We had the immense pleasure of coming across our beloved President in the hallways of the school that, for the next few days, will become his realm. His Excellency agreed to answer some of our humble questions. Considering you’re omnipresent, why did your Excellency choose to be in this session?

If you were to be on a boat for a really long time, what would be the five things you would take with you? Pretend you are mortal.

K: Reasons. Oh, wise one! What is the meaning of life? K: 42. Do you have any pets in this immense realm of yours, beside the delegates?

K: A female; a copy of “crime and punishment”, by Fiódor Dostóievski; my guitar; a female; another female. What is your superpower, oh master of masters? K: Reason.

K: I have a chicken in my fridge. Oh, and I also have Henrique and Julian.

We would like to thank the great Kriszzhufhefhg for welcoming us, simple peasants, in his domain of wisdom and light. We pray that he may lead us through times of darkness and teach us the ways of the European Youth Parliament. 22




[insert generic newspaper title here]