Be Prepared… A Short Zombie Survival Guide Part 1: It has begun… Picture this: You’re relaxing in your home on a day that seems normal. Then you get a call from your friend who tells you to turn on the TV. The first thing you see is a government news report, “Breaking news! There is an outbreak of a strange virus all over America. There is no known cure for it and is proven to be contagious! All civilians are required to stay in their homes until further notice!” Well. You then realize that you hear screaming, cars crashing, and gunshots outside. You look out your window and see people running away from other people. You’re confused at first until you see a couple of the shuffling figures attack a person and bite him! You see some people fighting back the (now you realize that they are infected humans) infected by shooting them. You’re sure the infected will be dealt with easily until you realize that the people are shooting them a ton of times but to no avail! You are really panicking now! So… That’s just one scenario of an apocalypse. Just to let you know, not all apocalypses will start out this way. But before we get to all that you might be thinking, “what are the chances of that ever happening?” Well, it’s more than you think my friend! A zombie apocalypse is not when the dead rise from their graves and inherit supernatural powers from some kind of voodoo magic. You simply need a disease like Mad Cow Disease for humans with some other extremes added. These extremes would be like feeling no pain at all, having superhuman senses and strength (but terrible coordination), and attacking and eating all other living things except for other infected. So you see? An apocalypse is more likely to happen than you think! This guide is a very simple outline on things that you should do when a zombie apocalypse in case; God forbid, should ever happen.
So let’s go over the basic procedures when an outbreak occurs: 1. First off. Don’t even think about leaving your house for the first few weeks. 2. Turn on all the sinks and showers in your house and store water. This will be very useful because you never know when water supplies will be cut. Thirst is as big of an enemy as the infected. 3. You should inventory all your items in your house that can be useful. It’s a good idea to stay organized in a situation like this! 4. Move all your items to a higher area within your house and destroy all access to your area like stairs, ladders, etc., when it is necessary. 5. If you don’t have any weapons then you should craft some weapons. One thing you should know is that if you have a firearm you can safely leave your house at the beginning.
So this is something you would do when you don’t have a firearm. If you do, then you can go wherever you want, shoot a couple rounds in the air, and sit back and relax as you watch the people get the heck out of the place. Now all you have to do is get the good stuff! You might
think, “but this will also attract zombies!” but it doesn’t matter too much, because remember. This is in the first week or two of the apocalypse. There are not too many zombies, and the people would already be making enough loud noise to attract zombies, so a few shots won’t add much. However, you must also remember to still stick to some of the law. The worst thing for you would be to get arrested and get locked up in a cell. You’ll either starve or be trapped if the prison gets overrun by the infected. So don’t go around doing stupid things while there is still some law enforcement. You do that when there is no law enforcement. You understand? By the way, don’t believe anything about there being a safe haven from zombies. It’s either government run (which is bad because they’ll probably use you as a lab rat), or it’s actually not safe at all. Just a quick overview on the government: THEY ARE NOT GOOD IN AN APOCALYPSE!!! If you go to a government run base or “refugee” camp for help, they’ll probably put you in concentration camps and all together, and they won’t trust you with guns. Say you’re in one of those camps, there are three things that could happen: 1. One of the civs gets infected and starts spreading it. The government will probably kill you all to be safe. 2. The government force you to work for them and run tests on some of you. You might be one of those unlucky people! 3. The base gets overrun and the government just ditch you and leave you for the dead! So you see? The government isn’t really to be trusted. You might have other plans however like going on the run. You can either go alone or with others. Both have their advantages. Going alone lets you conserve your supplies more easily, make it easier to travel, attract less attention, and make you less worried about others lagging behind. However, there are some downfalls like being alone, and not being able to carry as much as more than one person could. Having more than one person also has its advantages and disadvantages. Having more than one person has its own strengths, like having guard shifts when resting, carrying more supplies, having more manpower, and just having some company with you. However, there are also the downfalls. You make more noise in a group, use more supplies, and you may have people who can’t keep up. There are many more things that I could say about travelling, but I don’t really have enough room so here’s a simple overview: I personally think that small group of about five is the best. However, this might vary depending on your location and what your mission is. Also, when you’re going on the run, or even a simple scavenging mission from your house, ALWAYS, I repeat, ALWAYS, know where you’re going, how you’ll get there, how to get back, and have a back-‐up plan should something go wrong. Now, before I end this part, let’s go over a few weapons that you should use. If you can, try to get a police car. They have radios (useful), and probably have a twelve gauge shotgun on inside roof of the car. The car itself is also pretty durable, so it’ll be useful to travel around in. The ammo for that gun is very common, so it shouldn’t be too hard to get. Also, the police belts
have pistols that also use very common ammo. You should also get a carbine is you can, because it also uses the same light weight ammo as the pistol. For close up weapons, a crow bar is great, because it can also be used to pry doors open. Also, the katana is probably the best blade you can get. It can easily cut through rotted zombie flesh and is very durable, but finding battle ready versions is very hard. You can also get machetes at military stores, which are also black, which gives you some cover at night. There are many more weapons that you could use, but this is all I can write down for now. Also, don’t think that the biggest weapons, or the ones used in movies are the best. They’ll probably get you killed. Some of these weapons include: 1. The chainsaw: It’s heavy, needs fuel, and is really loud. 2. The heavy machine gun: Remember, you need a headshot to kill a zombie. The HMG is really inaccurate, and not all zombies are the same height. 3. Grenades: They only use shrapnel, and the chances of that hitting the zombie’s head aren’t as high as you think. Well, to make the list shorter, you should know that some of these weapons are made to kill humans, not zombies. A person can be shot in the heart or stomach and die, but a zombie must be hit at the head. However, you if you don’t want to go through the trouble of killing the undead, then you should just cut their heads off. But, you should remember that that severed zombie heads can still bite. You could blow someone’s legs off, and they would die, but a zombie would still survive. The zombies actions all come from the brain, which means that it’s like the “HQ or battery” of the body. If you destroy it, everything else doesn’t work. So for non-‐gun related weapons, you should consider weight, safety, and how easily it can break a zombie’s skull and brain. For guns, you should think about how common the gun’s ammo is, how heavy the gun is, and if it’s convenient. Also, zombies don’t need to breath, sleep, and did I mention that they don’t feel pain? However, you can starve them! But that takes a long time… Another thing I should mention, even though I’ve told you that some guns aren’t that good, you should still use them, but only as last resort. For example, if you have a 50. Caliber machine gun and a 50. Caliber sniper rifle, you should use the ammo for the sniper rifle first. You should only use the machine gun if it’s last resort. And, a quick thing to say to sum it up: A gun (no matter how bad it is) is better than no gun. Here’s some other advice. Say a zombie gets to you and attacks you. You might wonder, “What should I do now?” well if you still don’t know by now, then good luck! I’ll still tell you though. If you’ve been paying attention, you should have learned by now that the brain is the vital point of the zombie. So if you’re ever in close combat, then get your weapon and bash there head in, or just press a pistol to their head and pull the trigger. Also, try to keep the zombies teeth away from you, and don’t let them scratch you. This will get you infected. These things however can be hard if you’re not wearing the right stuff (yup, no more fashion in an apocalypse!). You should wear clothing that fits you nicely (not loose), avoid hoodies and clothing with strings that hang loose, and
you should also keep your hair short. A zombie can grab you by the hair and drag you off to your doom! I’m not saying you should shave your hair bald and wear gymnast tights! You can have some hair and still be safe and fashionable! Also, you should always feel comfortable in your clothing. How’re you going to fight off zombies while your extra-‐ skinny, skinny jeans are suffocating you, and your shirt is cutting off the circulation to your head and arms?
So, that’s all for part one and I hope you use this info to good use. And another thing to mention: Don’t waste your whole life on preparing and all that. Even though I said the chances are higher than you think, it doesn’t mean that it has a good chance of happening at all. So just keep it stored somewhere in the back of your head and continue on with your life. PS, here are some tips that can help you: 1. 2. 3. 4.
Zombies don’t have fear, so why should you? Blades don’t need reloading. Be organized! There is no safe… only safer.
Published on Mar 4, 2013