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EVERYBODY’S FREE TO WEAR SUNSCREEN

written by MARY SCHMICH GUZ BOOK .indd 1

15/12/2011 15:13


EVERYBODY’S FREE written by MARY SCHMICH GUZ BOOK .indd 2-3

15/12/2011 15:13


97,

WEAR SUNSCREEN WHEREAS THE REST OF MY ADVICE HAS NO BASIS MORE RELIABLE THAN MY OWN IF I COULD OFFER MEANDERING YOU ONLY ONE TIP EXPERIENCE

FOR THE FUTURE, SUNSCREEN WOULD BE IT

THE LONG TERM BENEFITS OF SUNSCREEN HAVE BEEN PROVED BY SCIENTISTS GUZ BOOK .indd 4-5

I WILL DISPENSE THIS ADVICE NOW

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE CLASS OF

ENJOY

POWER AND BEAUTY THE

OF YOUR

YOUTH

NEVER MIND, YOU WILL NOT UNDERSTAND THE POWER AND

BEAUTY

OF YOUR YOUTH UNTIL THEY’VE

FADED

BUT TRUST ME, IN 20 YEARS YOU’LL LOOK BACK AT THE PHOTOS OF YOURSELF AND RECALL IN A WAY YOU CANT GRASP 15/12/2011 15:13


THE REAL TROUBLES IN YOUR LIFE ARE APT TO BE HOW MUCH POSSIBILITY LAY BEFORE YOU AND HOW

FABULOUS LOOKED YOU REALLY

YOU ARE NOT AS FAT AS YOU

IMAGINE

DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE FUTURE

THINGS THAT NEVER CROSSED YOUR

WORRIED MIND, THE KIND THAT BLINDSIDE YOU AT 4 PM ON SOME IDLE TUESDAY

DO ONE THING EVERYDAY THAT SCARES YOU

SING

OR WORRY,BUT KNOW THAT WORRYING IS

AS EFFECTIVE AS TRYING TO SOLVE ALGEBRA EQUATIONS BY CHEWING BUBBLEGUM

GUZ BOOK .indd 6-7

15/12/2011 15:13


DON’T BE RECKLESS WITH OTHER PEOPLE’S HEARTS

THE RACE IS LONG AND IN THE END IT’S ONLY WITH YOURSELF

REMEMBER

DON’T PUT UP WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE RECKLESS

COMPLIMETS YOU’VE RECEIVED

WITH YOURS

FLOSS

DON’T WASTE YOUR TIME ON

JEALOUSY

FORGET THE INSULTS

IF YOU SUCCEED IN DOING THIS,

TELL ME HOW

SOMETIMES YOU’RE AHEAD, SOMETIMES YOU’RE BEHIND GUZ BOOK .indd 8-9

15/12/2011 15:13


KEEP YOUR OLD LOVE LETTERS,

W O R TH

AY W A

YOUR OLD BANK STATEMENTS

STRETCH DON’T FEEL GUILTY IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE THE MOST INTERESTING PEOPLE I KNOW DIDN’T KNOW AT 22 WHAT THEY WANTED TO DO WITH THEIR LIVES

SOME OF THE MOST INTERESTING 40 YEAR OLDS I KNOW STILL DON’T GUZ BOOK .indd 10-11

GET PLENTY OF

CALCIUM

BE KIND TO YOUR KNEES

GO NE

YOU WILL MISS THEM WHEN THEY ARE

15/12/2011 15:13


MAYBE YOU’LL MARRY, MAYBE YOU WON’T MAYBE YOU’LL HAVE

CHILDREN,

MAYBE YOU WON’T

MAYBE YOU’LL DIVORCE AT 40 MAYBE YOU’LL DANCE THE FUNKY CHICKEN ON YOUR

75

TH

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

GUZ BOOK .indd 12-13

WHATEVER OR YOU DO

DON’T CONGRATULATE YOURSELF TOO MUCH

BERATE YOURSELF EITHER

YOUR CHOICES ARE:

HALF CHANCE CHANCE HALF SO ARE EVERYBODY ELSE’S

15/12/2011 15:13


READ

h h h

hhh

h h h

hhh

ENJOY YOUR BODY: USE IT EVERY WAY YOU CAN

THE DIRECTIONS EVEN IF YOU DONT FOLLOW THEM

DONT BE AFRAID OF IT

OR WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF IT IT’S THE GREATEST INSTRUMENT YOU WILL EVER OWN

D AN C E

EVEN IF YOU HAVE NOWHERE TO DO IT BUT IN YOUR OWN LIVING ROOM GUZ BOOK .indd 14-15

DO NOT READ BEAUTY MAGAZINES: THEY WILL ONLY MAKE YOU FEEL

UGLY 15/12/2011 15:13


BROTHER AND SISTER TOGETHER WE’LL MAKE IT THROUGH SOMEDAY A SPIRIT WILL TAKE YOU AND QUIDE YOU THERE I KNOW YOU’VE BEEN HURTING BUT I’VE BEEN WAITING TO BE THERE FOR YOU AND I’LL BE THERE JUST HELPING YOU OUT WHENEVER I CAN

GUZ BOOK .indd 16-17

GET TO KNOW YOUR PARENTS:

YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN THEY’LL BE GONE FOR GOOD

BE NICE TO YOUR SIBLINGS:

THEY ARE YOUR BEST LINK TO YOUR PAST AND THE PEOPLE MOST LIKELY TO STICK WITH YOU IN THE FUTURE

UNDERSTAND THAT

FRIENDS COME AND GO BUT WITH A PRECIOUS FEW YOU SHOULD HOLD ON

15/12/2011 15:13


WORK HARD TO BRIDGE

ACCEPT CERTAIN INALIENABLE TRUTHS:

BECAUSE THE OLDER YOU GET, THE MORE YOU NEED PEOPLE KNEW WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG.

YOU TOO WILL GET OLD, AND WHEN YOU DO YOU’LL FANTASISE THAT WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG PRICES WERE REASONABLE, POLITICIANS WERE NOBLE

THE G A P S IN GEOGRAPHY AND LIFESTYLE

LIVE IN

NEW YORK CITY

ONCE

BUT LEAVE BEFORE IT MAKES YOU HARD-

LIVE IN

RISE WILL PRICES POLITICIANS WILL PHILANDER,

Northern california

AND CHILDREN RESPECT THEIR ELDERS.

ONCE

RESPECT YOUR ELDERS.

BUT LEAVE BEFORE IT MAKES YOU SOFT-

GUZ BOOK .indd 18-19

TRAVEL

15/12/2011 15:13


BE CAREFUL WHOSE ADVICE YOU BUYBUT BE PATIENT WITH THOSE WHO SUPPLY IT.

DONT EXPECT ANYONE ELSE TO SUPPORT YOU

ADVICE IS A FORM OF NOSTALGIADISPENSING IT IS A WAY OF FISHING THE PAST FROM DISPOSAL

MAYBE YOU’LL HAVE A TRUST FUND, MAYBE YOU’LL HAVE A WEALTHY SPOUSE BUT YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN EITHER ONE MIGHT RUN OUT

WIPING IT OFF

PAINTING OVER THE UGLY PARTS AND RECYCLING IT FOR MORE

HAIR

THAN IT’S WORTH

DON’T MESS TOO MUCH WITH YOUR OR BY THE TIME YOU ARE 40 IT WILL LOOK 85

BUT GUZ BOOK .indd 20-21

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TRUST ME ON THE SUNSCREEN

BROTHER AND SISTER TOGETHER WE’LL MAKE IT THROUGH SOMEDAY A SPIRIT WILL TAKE YOU AND QUIDE YOU THERE I KNOW YOU’VE BEEN HURTING BUT I’VE BEEN WAITING TO BE THERE FOR YOU AND I’LL BE THERE JUST HELPING YOU OUT WHENEVER I CAN

EVERYBODY’S FREE EVERYBODY’S FREE EVERYBODY

GUZ BOOK .indd 22-23

“ADVICE, LIKE YOUTH, PROBABLY JUST WASTED ON THE YOUNG “

designed by GUZEN AKNAR 15/12/2011 15:13


GUZ BOOK .indd 24

15/12/2011 15:13


everybody's free to wear sunscrenn