Page 47

bathroom, or a spot in the kitchen, allow your child to choose an area that will be designated as her place to regroup and calm down. Have her create a name for this special spot. Create a comfort basket. Find a basket and fill it with items that will help soothe your upset child. Certified Positive Discipline Trainer Glenda Montgomery advocates the addition of a “comfort basket” in feel-good spots. “If a child has any special toy or stuffed animal that he likes to hold when he’s upset, definitely add it to the comfort basket.” Blankets, books, and music are all excellent items to put in comfort baskets, as are lumps of clay to pound, exercise bands to stretch, and squishy balls to squeeze. Older children may like to keep a journal or sketchbook in their basket, or even a bottle of bubble bath to use. If you’re using a large area or a whole room as the feel-good spot, you could also include bigger items such as a punching bag or trampoline. The idea is to fill the area with items to help your child relieve stress and begin to calm down. Some children benefit from a physical outlet, while others prefer emotional outlets.

Ask preferences. When your child gets emotionally overwhelmed and upset and it’s time to put the feel-good spot to use, ask if she would like to go by herself or if she’d like you to come too. Children have different preferences for this; some kids may feel “banished” if they are expected to go alone, and would feel more secure if you’re there supporting them, while others need to be left alone to decompress. It is important to respect their preferences, and understand that these may change over the years. Parents can ensure that time-outs are truly in their child’s best interest if they ask for input, work together to understand everyone’s needs, remain flexible, and keep in mind the big picture; that a time-out is just a way of helping a child feel better so he can do better. Kelly Bartlett is the author of Encouraging Words For Kids. She is a Certified Positive Discipline Educator and freelance writer with a focus on child development, family relationships and discipline. You can find more of her work at www.kellybartlett.net 47

Green Child Magazine Winter 2013  

Green Child Magazine's Winter 2013 issue features a special section on a healthy, natural pregnancy, plus an in-depth look at the risks of r...

Read more
Read more
Similar to
Popular now
Just for you