POSITIVITY 4 EVER MAGAZINE Positivity 4 Ever is a quarterly mini-magazine designed to promote positivity, and provide helpful resources to enrich everyoneâ€™s life. You will enjoy reading positive conversations from authors, entertainers, and entrepreneurs. Positivity 4 Ever was created by Glenda Staten in 2012. Copyright 2012 by Glenda Staten, North Carolina Printed in the United States of America
TABLE OF CONTENTS Positive Conversation with Author Cornelia Brown . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Page 4 The Matter of Giving and Receiving by Katie Keller . . . . . . . . . . . . . Page 7 Relationship Resolutions by Pam Reaves . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Page 9 Special Thanks . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Page 11 Order Information . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Page 11
Positive Conversation with author Cornelia Brown Glenda: Hello Cornelia, how are you? Cornelia: I am doing well; I am truly a blessed woman! Glenda: Please tell us about yourself? Cornelia: How much time do you have???? : ) I grew up in Southern Bavaria in Germany as the daughter of Anneliese Nagler and Josef Nagler. My entire family, including me, worked from a very young age in our family business. My grandmother owned several hotels in the pretty Alpine villages Lenggries and Bad Toelz. I loved to sing, dance and write! I was an outgoing girl who always looked for new things and adventures. I guess this is how I ended up in America; my curiosity and the desire for learning all about God’s wonderful world, cultures and its people. Today I am a wife, the mother of two wonderful adult daughters, and the grandmother of two little ones, a boy and a girl. I am an author/speaker and advocate for multi-racial families. I work with the multi-cultural bone marrow drives all over the world. My newest venture is that I am a local coordinator for foreign exchange students and I am placing high school kids from all over the world with American families for a semester or the entire school year. Glenda: Why did you become an author? Cornelia: I had a lot of hurt and pain within me because of falling in love with my African American husband. Many things took place overseas and then in America that absolutely shocked me. Quite frankly, some things still shock me to this day. When I turned fifty, it was time to reveal what was in my heart, and put it all on paper. God made a way for me to do that, and so I did. Glenda: Tell us about the books you have written, especially “Black and White Makes Brown”. Cornelia: My books are all about inclusion and I am trying to give people that still live in mono-racial communities an opportunity to read about my life because many of them don’t like multi-cultural families. My hope is to trigger some positive discussions and to bring encouragement to families that have been hurt.
My message is that it is okay to love whom you love no matter what the skin color. What God puts together, no human being has the right to judge or separate. God creates life and our children are productive human beings in communities all over the world. Our children are not half-breeds or war-babies or whatever other awful names there are. Our children are wonderful masterpieces, whole, nothing lacking and nothing missing because GOD never makes a mistake. He allows life because it is good. My book, “He died for you and me and He died for all shades of humanity” is a fun little book of poetry and short stories from brothers and sisters all over the world. My children’s books teach about multi-cultural children and are great tools to teach kids to accept each other. I wrote “Constance the Little Angel Wants Curls” and the little booklet, “Constance the little Angel and the precious drop of healing serum.” The booklet is my fundraising item—20% of the profit goes to “A place for us National” with the bone marrow drives. It teaches children and adults about the desperate need of a match for bone marrow! Glenda: Why did you choose the title “Black and White Makes Brown”? Cornelia: My publisher and I searched and searched for an appropriate title because I wanted it to be different and not just another typical “interracial” type of title. One day I went to pick up my little granddaughter and she had to answer questions from other children about my race. She is a beautiful brown and most kids are a bit shocked when they see me, but my little Kayla always knows what to say. Once I picked her up and she shouted as she got in my car “Oma, Oma I know why our last name is Brown! It’s because black and white makes brown.” Immediately I knew that this was the title and the publisher agreed. Out of the mouth of babes speaks God’s mighty wisdom! Glenda: What do you want readers to learn from your book? Cornelia: I want people to stop and think about how they interact with multicultural couples and families. There are still so many people that make hurtful remarks when they see those families. I want them to think before they speak and then to embrace and love them.
I want God to reveal to the reader that with HIM all is possible even if you may think that you have done something so terrible that you may never ever be able to return to HIM. I want people to understand that â€?Love loves all colors, yet is colorblind!â€? Glenda: How do you stay positive during stressful times? Cornelia: Oh boy, I cry a lot and smile a lot! I believe there is healing in crying and smiling and always talking to GOD. I am a very active person but when I feel stressed, I slow down. I begin to withdraw from the hustle and bustle of everyday activity and only speak to positive friends and family. I have learned to receive only kind words from others! I remove myself from negative people and negative forces. I release my cares unto my Father in Heaven and keep doing it until I am strong enough to leave my cares there. Glenda: I purchased your book when we met, but please tell everyone where your books can purchased. Cornelia: www.mrscorneliabrown.com , www.tatepublishing.com and www.amazon.com . You may also purchase my books at all book venues. Glenda: Thank you for having a positive conversation with us. Cornelia: I am so thankful for this opportunity! My prayer for you and your wonderful message is that He leads and guides you always, that no weapon formed against you can or will ever prosper and that the path is cleared from any roadblocks from the world because the windows of Heaven are pouring out abundant blessings. I bless your mission with my positive thoughts and true agape LOVE! AMEN!
The Matter of Giving and Receiving by Katie Keller That tender look in someone’s eyes: the look that says “thank you” without words. It is a thank you that comes from the depth of the spirit and soul. It is a look brought on by grace. There is a pure gratitude that comes from one person having their needs met through another. The awe, the astonishment, the wonder as we remind each other that there is goodness in this world. There are people who love you, notice your burden, and wish to help you. There is a stewardship that goes into working with other people. When we work with others for any amount of time, we find out things about them. As a result, we need to be sensitive to their needs. We can give to help meet their needs through a variety of ways. We can give financially, give provisionally through food and clothing, give an encouraging word, give opportunities, give our time or just give support by listening. This world can seem to have more problems than solutions if we let it. We can be encouraged though, because we are each other’s solutions. Each of us has the capacity to meet the needs of other people and in return have our needs met. I recently have transitioned from being part-time to full-time with my art and design business. I have had a business partnership with an urban public school since 2010. For the 2010-2011 school year, I worked with five 2nd and 3rd grade classrooms just about every Friday that school was in session. They asked if I could focus on one of their greatest needs, mathematics, and I accepted. As a result of my time there, it came to my attention that the school did not have an art teacher or a formal art program. I personally know and believe in the healing power of the expressive and meditative nature of art. So I was disturbed that a school where the children are overcoming poverty, gang culture, and a local economy with the drug trade embedded into it did not have a formal arts outlet for the children. The arts can help the students channel some of their anger and despair into nonviolent creative expression. Do I blame the schools? No. The teachers I worked with were dedicated and effective. Do I blame the leadership? No. The principal at this school is amazing. It is not about blaming; it is about fixing a problem. I know and believe in the healing power of creativity. So it is my responsibility to make a difference.
I was further developing my business since I had made the full-time transition. As a result of the time I had given to this school, I received a renewed clarity and mission for the business: to fill the world with positive and original art and design to help provide arts education for all schools. So because I gave, I received. When this phase of development was completed, it was a â€œlast piece in the puzzleâ€? moment. There was a deep sense of completion. I was able to contact the principal about doing some arts education. He put me in contact with the after-school coordinator and I was given the opportunity to teach a monthly program to fulfill my renewed company vision. I was able to receive my need because I gave to help their needs. We all have situations in our walk of life where we see a need and have an idea for a solution. We see needs like love for a person who has recently suffered a loss, strength for an elderly person who is carrying something heavy, provision for a person who appears to be homeless, or deliverance for someone battling an addiction. We can send a card or call the person who has recently lost a loved one. We can ask that senior citizen if we can help with his or her bags. We can buy new clothes or fresh food for the homeless. We can continue to be kind to that person who is battling an addiction and refuse to say this person has no purpose. Or maybe it is the single parent that just needs a word that acknowledges that you see what they are going through and you believe in them and can assure them better days are coming. Bring your thoughts to action. Trust that your acts of kindness will be wellreceived. We never know whose prayers we are answering when we take a step of faith to help another person out. And we never know how our prayers will be answered as a result of our giving. Katie Keller is a designer and the owner at Graceful Works. www.gracefulworks.com She can be reached at email@example.com . Images used with permission and attribution to www.freedigitalphotos.net
Relationship Resolutions by Pam Reaves Once I Leave a Relationship How Do I Move Forward? Moving forward after a relationship has ended is crucial to the healing process. If the relationship ended, chances are something happened or did not happen that you expected, wanted, or needed. Whatever it was, the consequences left you feeling hurt, unfulfilled, neglected, or just wishing for something and/or someone different. Although ending a relationship usually happens because something just isn’t right, there are those individuals who struggle with moving on. They become stuck in what I call the Zone of Personal Paralyze (“ZPP”). In the ZPP, a person is miserable because the relationship ended, but unable or refuse to move on and beyond. I once wrote an article regarding struggling with residual feelings, and in that article I explained to readers why residual feelings can adversely affect even the strongest of us. You see a relationship, whether it’s good or bad, over time becomes a part of us. During the relationship, one or both individuals were developing feelings, emotions, and bonds with his or her partner. Development is a process, which involve stages. So when you’ve been developing feelings, emotions, and bonds over a period of time, it is unreasonable to expect that those feelings, emotions, and bonds can be completely discarded immediately without any lasting effects. Never beat yourself up just because you have residual feelings. While they contribute to the struggle with going forward, they can be dealt with. Some people believe that just because certain feelings are still with them, this means they should remain in a relationship that may very well need to be dissolved. So once again, I will stress “residual” means left over, scraps, remnants, odds and ends, etc. When you continue to entertain, embrace, and operate from the basis of residual feelings, you become your own roadblock to moving forward. That is not what you want and certainly not what you deserve. If the roadblock is you, then you are in the perfect position to remove it because you can handle you. Never minimize your inner-strength and conclude that you cannot help yourself. Yes you can. You just have to believe it and exercise the power within. 9
Going forward after a relationship has ended requires self-love, courage, and a commitment to your own wellness. Allow yourself a period of solitude, grieving, or whatever it is that you need in order to decompress, figure things out, and decide your next move. But that Down Time has got to have limits, and you are not to remain in the ZPP indefinitely. You must love you enough to decide that going forward is necessary and what’s best for you. You must exercise the courage that you do possess in order to face your fears. Remember, the relationship ended because something wasn’t right. So turning back is not an option. You must remain a part of the world and get involved in other things that you like to do, or would like to do. If you develop multiple joys, they will sustain you when one part of your life isn’t going well. "While you're busy involving yourself in other things and people, there won't be time to remain stuck in the ZPP." People who are unable to go forward are, or will become unhappy, bitter, stressed, and defeated. These are toxic attitudes that will affect your health. So come on, a relationship that has ended can never be worth your health and/or your life. “The Power Begins Within. Live Like It” © Pam Reaves Pamela Reaves is the Founder and CEO of NELLA LLC. She is a Certified Professional Coach, with concentrations in Motivational Coaching and Relationship Coaching. Pam is also the author of the thought-provoking and powerful book, "Is It Love...Or Merely a Sick Attachment?" "Is It Love..." is published by Tate Publishing & Enterprises and has been well-received by readers as far away as Africa and Australia. Pam is a platinum level expert author who writes articles for EzineArticles.com. The next book Pam will release is entitled “Loving Scott Harrington”. Loving Scott Harrington is a fictional novel based on the real life story of Pam’s maternal grandfather who was born into slavery and became a free man at the age of 17. Pam holds a Bachelor of Science Degree in Business Management and has over 30 years experience in working and thriving in diverse corporate cultures in the areas of human resource, labor relations, finance, legal, and real estate. She has appeared on a number of radio talk shows, participated in numerous blog-radio talk shows, and on cable TV talk shows. She has co-hosted virtual think tanks, and she’s been a featured author and speaker at a host of other cultural events, book festivals, and expos. Please visit www.pamreavesnellallc.com to learn more about Pam, her life coaching practice, upcoming books and events.
Special Thanks Cornelia Brown, thank you for your positive conversation. You are an inspiration to everyone. Katie Keller, thank you for sharing “The Matter of Giving and Receiving.” Pam Reaves, thank you for providing positive insight in your column Relationship Resolutions by Pam Reaves.
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Glenda Staten grew up in Georgia. She enlisted in the Army and worked for numerous organizations in the United States and abroad before retiring in 2004. While Glenda was assigned to The National Defense University in Washington, DC, she was selected for the Senior Noncommissioned Officer in Charge position for the Vice Chief of Staff of the Army at the Pentagon, and she completed her military career while assigned to the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Personnel Administration and Services Division at the Pentagon. Glenda received numerous awards while in the military including two Defense Meritorious Service Medals, the Meritorious Service Medal, and the Joint Service Commendation Medal. She completed her Masterâ€™s Degree in Management from City University of Seattle in Bellevue, Washington. She enjoys helping others by contributing to local and national charities.
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