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something?” I was surprised by her attitude. She usually got mad when I came home this late. "Hi," I said. “A sandwich would be nice. I’m beat. I need a bath." I headed for the stairs and looked in on the girls, both sound asleep, and as always my heart stopped when I looked at them sleeping. Wide awake they could be a handful, but there is something about a sleeping child that moves me beyond speech. By the time I’d finished in the bathroom there was a sandwich and a cup of tea on the bedside table ready for me and I was grateful I didn’t have to go back downstairs. There was no sign of Rachel but I could hear the TV, so I ate the snack and lay down, and I suppose I fell asleep for a while. I don t know what woke me to be honest, but the bedside clock told me it was past midnight and I could hear Rachel talking on the phone again. I remembered she said she’d call back to whoever it was she was speaking to, but it was late to be having a chat. On the other hand, I had learned that women can talk at any time of the day or night with consummate ease, pick up where they left off two days ago or two weeks ago as if nothing had disturbed the conversation. On my way to the toilet I heard Rachel say: "I get so exited when I see him, like I used to get with Mike only better." I stopped dead while she listened to the caller. “Well I know, but I can’t help myself. I Just can‘t wait to see him, I can’t stop thinking about him." She looked up then and saw me coming down the stairs. “I have to go," she said and put the phone down.

"Did you mean that Rachel? What you just said. Did you mean it?” For an instant her face looked so vulnerable and scared I remembered how I had once loved her. But it was a fleeting thing that vanished the moment she opened her mouth and became angry. “Well I’m sick of my life if you must know, all I do is look after the girls and this house and you, and you’re always at work. It’s pretty obvious we’re over." “Oh,” I mumbled, still in shock. So she wanted romance instead of, or as well as, all this that she once wanted? Rachel had said all she ever wanted was a nice house and a family, that‘s what she said, gazing at me at the time as I recall, and looking as if she meant it. And I provided that because I thought it was what she wanted. “Well I want a divorce Mike. I don’t love you any more and I know you don’t love me so there it is, I want you to leave." "What!" That stung me out of my stupor. “What are you talking about? Where do I go exactly?" "I don’t know but I want you out of here. You'll be impossible to live with now you know, and I wont stand it Mike, I won’t.” She started to cry, and as tired as I was I went back upstairs and packed an overnight bag, kissed my sleeping girls, and left the house in a daze. I really didn’t know where to go or what to do, I wasn’t even sure of what had just happened. Was it a row? Or had my marriage just ended? But I did need to get away from her at that moment. I remember that.

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Gold Dust

issue 35 summer 2019

Profile for Gold Dust magazine

Gold Dust Issue 35 ~ summer 2019  

Twice yearly magazine of literature and the arts. This issue contains 10 features and reviews, 7 short stories, 4 pieces of flash fiction an...

Gold Dust Issue 35 ~ summer 2019  

Twice yearly magazine of literature and the arts. This issue contains 10 features and reviews, 7 short stories, 4 pieces of flash fiction an...

Profile for golddust
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