Issuu on Google+


“A tongue-in-cheek look at our social media excess.” — THE DENVER POST

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:eb`am&a^Zkm^]`b``e^hgahp^o^krhg^lZ]]b\m^]mh?Z\^[hhd' — GEEK MAGAZINE

:anfhkhnlehhdZmma^\hffhg[Z][^aZobhkl' — FAMILY HEALTH AND WELLNESS

@^mhgma^?Z\^[hhd=b^m  — CAMPUS CIRCLE


The facebook diet gemini adams





www . unplugseries . com


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you know you're a facebook addict when . . .


you open your account just to check for messages but find you'RE still sitting there five hours later.


you've started to mark things you "like" with post-it notes.


you get car sick on every journey because you're busy checking your status updates and news feed.


you check in wherever you go.


YOu suffer from withdrawal symptoms

when you can't

access your account.


the guru you worship isn't the buddha, jesus, or allah, it's . . . mark zuckerberg.


you're suicidal if you don't get more than

200

happy birthday

messages posted on your wall.


You "poke" random strangers when you want to get their attention.


After a "great" night out, you awake, not to the alarm, but to hundreds of new friend requests and tags in some really embarassing photos.


"GRRRR ... Doesn't he know I like my privacy!"


You've created a page for your imaginary friend, cat, car, or your dog.


you phone your friends to ask: "did you see what i wrote on your wall today?"


if you've fallen deeply into the technoloGY rabbit hole that is facebook, then maybe it's time 0+1*,(1#* 0'!0!$-detox. we prescribe . . .


the

facebook diet


It's time to unplug!

c

lose

your

facebook

account. . . duh.


take a tech-detox!

s

tart or join a club. one with real live human

interaction, spit, warts, bad breath, and all!


It's time to unplug!

f

all in love.


take a tech-detox!

s

pend a year living with an amazonian tribe deep in

the jungle.


It's time to unplug!

t

ake up knitting or bird watching, but not the

angry ones.


It's time to unplug!

D

onate

your

laptop

to

electronicstakeback.com,

but first check its real worth at buymytronics.com


take a tech-detox!

S

pend

your

Facebook

time

studying

Roget's

Thesaurus for synonyms of "like," in order to develop your vocabulary.


with special thanks to . . .

a

huge mexican wave of thanks goes out to guy hoLmes (my hubby),

deanna leah, john wilson, finny foxdavies, nancy L. reinhardt, scott rose and george adams.


more on the unplug series . . . visit unplugseries.com for more funny tech-detox diet tips and hilarious pictures of addicts tapping in to technology. look for @facebookdiet or tweet using #facebookdiet or #unplugseries


about the author . . .

G

emini adams has facebooked for britain! when not feeding her facebook addiction, she can be found writing, drawing, or throwing the ball for her two woofers! meet her at: GEMINIADAMS.com


the end share your funny facebook addiction stories with us at . . . confessyours.com


$!!++'%!0 Published by Live Consciously Publishing, Ltd. Registered Offices: 2 Woodberry Grove, North Finchley, London, N12 0DR www.liveconsciouslynow.com ePub ISBN: 978-­0-­9554656-­4-­2 Copyright © Gemini Adams, 2013. All rights reserved. Library of Congress Control Number: 2012910445 Any unauthorized copying, broadcasting, or public performance will constitute an infringe-­ ment of copyright. No part of this publication may be reproduced, scanned, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, or otherwise), without prior written consent of both the copyright owner and the publisher. This publication is in no way associated with, in partnership with, affiliated to, sponsored, or endorsed by Facebook Inc. Names, characters, places, or incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.


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The Facebook Diet: 50 Funny Signs of Facebook Addiction and Ways to Unplug with a Digital Detox (The