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THE P110RK1:

Vol. 1 Issue 1



[The Phorkel Underground GCS (Catacombs) Issue 1

Rush for Change in Atmosphere!!!

Volume 1

Abortion and Environment S t u d e n t ' s views i1


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Vol. 1 Issue 1

Fr@m the Editors Top Ten lists. Editorials, Reviews, and Stupid Awards! What else can you ask for ITGAI.LY? It's all r i g h t here in the first ever underground GCS Newspaper! We have worked on this paper for a month and have excreted it w i t h pride. It's f u n , printed on recyclable paper, AND is lemon-freshened. Our four fore-fathers have spent much time and sweat into this t h i n g and hope you like it. Now READ IT! A day of acquaintance, And ilien the longer span of custom. Rut first The hour of astonishment.

OMEGAÂŤGI.ORY's Top Ten Ways You Can Tell That Mr. Diveki Has Gone Over the Odge. 10. He jumps around the room yelling, "More 'splosions, More 'splosions" 9. Two words: Safety Shower. 8. He starts licking the grease board clean. 7. Makes everyone sing H u n g a r i a n folk songs before class. G. Instructs students on how to l i g h t your mattress on fire w i t h o u t matches. 5. He makes Top Ten Lists. 4. Gives children lobotomies IN CLASS. 3. He announces t h a t it is "Nap-Time" and falls asleep. 2. Makes kids stick paper clips in electrical outlets. 1. He starts faking H u n g a r i a n accents. All correspondence s h o u l d be left w i t h P h o r k e spokesperson Neal Scoones in 8K. A l l m a t e r i a l m u s t be in w r i t t e n form. C o n t r i b u t i o n s (Cash or A r t i c l e ) are welcome. This issue of the Phorke is dedicated to Laura Price S t u p i d Award of the M o n t h : Michael Spencer for h a v i n g d i f f i c u l t y opening his chocolate milk.

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Vol. 1 Issue 1

Editorial: GCS' Hiring Policies


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Recently, there has been an increased interest in the GCS teacher employment policy, spurred by the recent firing of grade 7 and 8 English teacher, Laura Price. Basically, the system works like this: Once there is an opening, a panel that consists of Mr. Ervin, Mr. Davidson, the division head (in our case Mrs. Collet), and the <A.y .irtment head, looks at the resumes they receive. After a process of elimination, the pool is lowered to four or five teachers, who are then called in to teach one of the classes that the position would cover. At this class at least one committee member is present, and they observe how the class proceeds. The final decision, however, is put into the hands of the headmaster, or in his absence the assistant head. Then, the teacher who e v e n t u a l l y gets hired is p u t on a three year probationary period, d u r i n g which they could be fired for any reason. At the

end of that period the teacher is given "implied tenure", which in essence means they could be fired anyway, but the administration liked what they saw, and probably isn't going to fire anyone without a reason. This outdated policy might have worked well in the economic boom of the '8()'s, but in today's tough job market? The public school teachers are given much better contracts and higher salaries too. By using this system, t h i n k how many good applicants we looseto other schools. The school recongnizes that these people are skilled workers, yet they insist on using this policy t h a t gives them less job security t h a n many unskilled workers. As concerned students we believe that this system is thwarting the continuing development of Grace and should be changed. Our teachers should get the respect they deserve from the administration. 4 -Shortee

Editorial : Abortion Lei's j u s t say for a second that you had no choices in life. Somebody whom you never met decided to control everything that you did. You couldn't eat what you wanted, you c o u ' d n ' t sleep when you wanted, and you c o u l d n ' t t h i n k what vou wanted.

This sounds like t h e plot to an Orson Welles book, but t h i s is w h a t many pro-choice activists say about a n i i abortionisim. They say that it takes away a basic right of a woman: the right to bear her child. The pro-choicers have a woman's r i g h t s based a r « u m c n i

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the only choice except legalized abortions) kill women. The Lambs of Christ (a pro-life organization) says a fetus is a human being and human beings are creations of God and should

while pro-lifers have a religion based argument. The Anti-abortion (or pro-life as they call themselves to mock the pro-choicers) believe that children are sacred and should not be killed Question What do you consider yourself?

; Pro-life | 0%

Pro-choice 90%

| i

because it would violate God's Will. This argument has attracted many important figures including George Bush. Many celebrities (and Democrats) are pro-choice. It is a firm argument and not easily penetrated. It argues "back-alley abortions" (usually

never be killed. The Women's Action Coalition refutes that statement by saying that a person is somebody that is independent. Therefore, they suggest, a fetus is not a person and it would not be immoral to kill one. Both of these views have a good deal of backing. Whether you are pro-choice or pro-life, you have a respectable position in this argument of abortion. 4 OMEGAQGLORY

Editorial: Environment Civil Disobedience is the practice of non-violently breaking the law to voice one's strong opinion on an issue. The main purpose of getting arrested is to see that your views are widely covered by the press â&#x20AC;&#x201D; to get on the front page. Question Do you think breaking the law for the environment is a worthy cause?

Generally, before the action, an agreement is reached in which

the demonstrators are detained for a short time and then released. The environmental organization, Greenpeace, strongly believes in this method of protest

Yes 50%



< No 45%


and hires people to scale walls and hang large

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Vol. 1 Issue I.

Tlil: PllOKKIi

banners. Most of the time, the infractions involved are minor ones like trespassing and blocking traffic. One of the more memorable recent actions was when SI-AC (The Student Environmental Action Coalition) demonstrators went out and stenciled ten foot tall messages on the middle of four avenues at three in the morning. Also, some of you might have heard the fiasco at the U.N. d u r i n g the

preparations for the Rio Conference where demonstrators chained themselves to parked cars and the U.N. gate. My personal opinion is that if the protest does not jeopardi/e anyone, but the demonstrators, And if the}' feel strongly about the issue, they are f u l l y justified in their actions. 0 -S nor tee

Reviews MUSIC S i n g l e s Soundtrack The Singles Soundtrack is an a l b u m centered on the Seattle music scene. Though it is compiled of songs from the same place they have a wide variety. There is a metalsounding song from Sound Garden called Birth R i t u a l , an acoustic ballad from Chris Cornell and a track from Paul Westerberg t h a t is q u i t e upbeat compared to the rest of the album. 1. Alice in C h a i n s Would? The first track from the album is a song centered around its baseline. I t is one of the worst, if not Till:, track on the a l b u m . Amongst its drawbacks are its drone and unimelligibility. 1 could not tell you w h a t it's about because I can't understand a word except for an occasional "would".

2. Pearl fam Breath Breath is q u i t e unintelligible itself but offers more of a song than Would?. Breath is uneven in its progression and offers much more to follow than Would?. The g u i t a r solo is great and the drums are good too, so it is d i f f i c u l t to get bored. 3. Chris Cornell Seasons Seasons is the acousticballad 1 mentioned before. It is about an outsider who has been t h a t way all his life. Chris Cornell wrote and performed the song himself, and he does a perfect job. 4. P a u l Westerherg Dyslexic Heart Dyslexic Heart is about a man who claims to have a dyslexic heart, and, as a result, has a tough time with women. This song is very upbeat and a

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Birth Ritual, co-written good break from the rest of the album. by Chris Cornell, Matt Cameron, 10. Paul Westerberg and Kim Thayil, is a killer Waiting for headbangin' track. Thayil's no Somebody mercy lead makes this song Waiting for Somebody is very moshable. Chris Cornell another upbeat song that comes provides kick-ass vocals that at a great time. It is selfare very good to sing along to. explanatory and is much like This song gets the Head banger of the Album Award. Dyslexic Heart. 5. Love Mongers Battle of 8. Pearl lam Evermore State of Love and The Battle of Evermore is Trust a classic Led Zeppelin song that This song is co-written by I think is more effective w i t h Eddie Vedder, Mike McCready, the two vocalists the Love and Jeff Ament. Though I can't Mongers have understand the because Robert words I s t i l l Singles Soundtrack Plant (Zeppelin t h i n k it's a wild j AAA Metalness vocalist) could track. A guy Mellowness ! AAAA not achieve the talkin 1 being i AAAA O v e r a l l harmonies the helped from ! Coolness Love Mongers himself is a great have. song for the selfG. Mother Love Bone destructive like Hendrix, John Chloe Bon ham, and J. Morrison Dancer/Crown of (Musicians who died of Thorns substance abuse). Chloe Dancer/Crown of 9. M u d h o n e y Thorn seems out of place with a Overblown piano carrying the sound and This song owes itself to the angelic voice of the late the d r u m m e r with a swingin' Andy Wood. This song is an rhythm. This song is definitely eight m i n u t e effort with light one of the best on the album. guitars compared to the rest of It's basically about t h e the album. Though it doesn't popularity of Seattle based rock seem like it belongs there I n' roll and how Mudhoncy t h i n k it is a good break from thinks it's "overblown". the electric onslaught of the 13. S m a s h i n g other tracks. Pumpkins 7. Sound Garden Drown Birth Ritual


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A great ballad that I think could stand to lose a little feedback. 1 mean during the guitar solo it's cool, but not for 8 minutes. The song does have a few good parts. 12. Screaming Trees Nearly Lost You As in Overblown the drums support this song. As does the lead guitar. I think that this is the best track on this exceptionally good album.0 -Wacky the Spatula BOOK


"It" by Stephen King is a gory talc of horror and suspense that really wants to make you want to keep on reading. At 1090 pages, it is on the long side, but it is worth the read. Ry making the story long, and putting in some good sex scenes, King makes it so you really get to know the

Vol. 1 Issue 1 characters. For you gore fans out there, there is very graphic detail in some sections of the book, but It is much more deep than Freddie Kruegar. Basically, the storyline runs like t h i ~ : There is an entity that lives and feeds on the small town of Deny, Maine. Even7 27 years this entity, known as It, comes out of hiding and feeds on the minds and bodies of little children, and those who get in its way. Each of It's periods of terror that occur every 27 years. Then, in 1957, a group of seven children are brought together by some force to try to bring It to its doom. What happens then? Does It die? Am I asking enough stupid questions? Well, kids, this is how you find out: READ THE BOOK.O -Shortec

The Phorke is: Editors: OMCGAQGLORY, Shortee, Wacky the Spatula, The Walrfi.s Writers: Publisher: OMEGAQGLOKY Copying: The WalrUs Artists: 2 Drug Addicts: Group Psychologist: Oscar the Grouch Disclaimer The Phorke is meant to be a more current, student-run editorial publication. Our purpose is to portray our opinions, and make known certain school policies (hat have come into dispute. This publication is not, however, meant to offend anyone in a Hbelous manner, or to incite undue action against the administration. Any responses to articles seen in this paper should be put in written form to a\'oid unnecessary conflict. We hope you enjoy our works, and read on.




'Lft us go then, you and I, When the evening is spread out against the sky Like a p a t i e n t etherised upon a table; Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets, The muttering retreats Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells: Streets that follow like a tedious argument of insidious intent To lead you to an overwhelming question. . . Oh,do not ask,'What is it? 1 Let us go and make our visit.


How do I know what I'm going to do when I grow up if I don't know what I'm going to do after Innch.-- -rDennis the Menace

I don 't know what's gonna happen m a n , but I wanna get my kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames


With my hair down/so.- What shall we do to-morrow? What shall we ever do?' 3L. the spacemen are calling voices linger but st -ill you are immune to their pain then you come back to us they offer a cige^r^tte you take it and proceed the spacemen can usually get them cheaper than most i am still hearing hints of their chatter just a little smell of their smoke we scaled the jails walls and became confused we had not yet dealt w/life we became subject to ridicule 'i was not bothered but i could see she was i had a star once that brought me joy i miss that girl i opened the window because it was hot that morning i awoke to find myself on a roof amidst sun i felt as if the sky beared its weight upon me basically my head

still i missed the star whom had tolc

me things with her light like streets for walk-ing had been refined to transport more than people ,that idea made me sad i wanted the smell of smoke to stay it was a freindly smell â&#x20AC;˘ their voices ware like this as well good-night Angelina when we wake i know their wil] be s t a r s . . .

' If a cat always lands on its feet, and bread always lands butter-side up what would happen if you tied .bread butter-side up to a cat's jback? Q â&#x20AC;˘-1


It must be unless I'm wrong. And I'm never wrong. -Kumper Dink

The Phorke Vol. 1 Issue 1