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CHALLENGE The Newsletter of the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County – Serving New Jersey’s GLBTI Communities Since 1972

Volume 36, Issue 4, May 2010

The Voice of GAAMC By Andy Skurna

Over the past 17 months there have been a few occasions where the “Voice of GAAMC” has come into question. And, as GAAMC’s president, those questions usually come to me. Several members of the Board of Trustees have stated that the president has the right to speak on behalf of the organization. And in certain circumstances that seems wholly appropriate. However, my personal preference is to avoid speaking for someone else, especially an organization that’s been around for nearly four decades. Now, there are certain public arenas in which a stance must be taken. For example, when asked by members of the press to speak about marriage equality, I obviously stated that GAAMC fully supports equality for all people when it comes to the civil right to marriage, and all other basic rights. Believe it or not, there are members of the GLBTI community who, like some straight people, disagree with this most basic position. And to them I say I’d never force anyone to marry. But, should they wish to get married, I will fight for their right to make that decision for themselves.  And, if a poll of GAAMC members was taken, I have every confidence that the overwhelming majority would agree that everyone should have the same rights. I have also received negative comments regarding my article “Immutable Characteristics,” (see page 14 in Pride Guide 2009-2010) as some felt it unfairly attacks followers of Christianity and other belief systems. I have also heard that it may offend members of the African American community.  And, “GAAMC” should not make these statements.  My answer then and now is that GAAMC did not make Inside Challenge these statements, Andy Skurna did. GAAMC Events........................... page 2 The Bulletin Board..................... page 3 Getting Personal........................ page 3 This Month's Contributors............. page 3 Gleanings................................. page 4 When it comes to GAAMC’s members and guests and their use of our outlets, I try Calendar .................................. page 5 to employ a conservative, hands-off policy.  I avoid interfering in the dialogue, Coconut Curried Chicken Recipe .... page 7 unless I see that someone is making unsubstantiated claims, personal attacks, or any mention of illegal activity.  I believe in the power of the community to self- Join the Hike-Nics!..................... page 7 Ten Safety Tips.......................... page 7 regulate, and to offer support and guidance. Dancing to Architecture............... page 8 Two recent examples come to mind.  Several months ago a battle raged in our GAAMC Information................... page 10 Yahoo! Group message board.  A former GAAMC member, and repeated contributor to our newsletters and programs, made an unsubstantiated claim about a religious leader.  Followers of that religion called him on it, and a battle ensued.  After several days it was brought to my attention and I was asked to intervene.  I quietly asked the author to choose his words more carefully, and to avoid repeatedly posting his catalogue of articles to the group.  I even suggested that he add a tag line at the end of his posts inviting those interested to read his blog. In contrast, I have signed letters to elected officials, and statements of support for Census 2010, and even press releases, as the president, on GAAMC letterhead. I try to make certain that GAAMC’s Board of Trustees is aware of any such documents or position statements, and I give serious consideration to any concerns or requests for edits.

He immediately accused me of censorship. I was stunned and disappointed.  He then made a public claim that “GAAMC” was censoring him, and I received several requests (more like demands) for clarification from users in the Yahoo! Group.  I did not respond to any of the requests.  Simply put, I had a private dialogue and no one was going to waste my time by goading me into publicly disputing ridiculous claims. When I did not respond, he defiantly reposted the offensive material.  As GAAMC’s president and webmaster, I felt it was my duty to enforce the policy stated on the home page of the Yahoo! Group.  I deleted the message.  I also changed his rights so that his future posts would have to be approved by a moderator.  He repeated his claims of censorship and withdrew his membership in GAAMC’s Yahoo! Group. In recent issues of Challenge, GAAMC member and Challenge’s volunteer editor, Allen Neuner, intelligently and passionately expressed his feelings regarding NJ’s battle for marriage equality.  Whether or not I agree with Allen is irrelevant, and I continue my refrain from comment. Just as in the case of my “Immutable Characteristics” article, I received calls and email from GAAMC members, and some community leaders, expressing dismay that GAAMC would take such a position.  Once again, I was asked to publicly speak on behalf of GAAMC, and to clarify GAAMC’s position. No.  I will not. There is nothing within that original work, or the responses to it, that leads the reader to believe that GAAMC is expressing its opinion on any matter.  If any reader overlooks the name of the author and wrongly assumes they speak for GAAMC, let this serve as clarification. Unless the article, post, speech, or other work clearly states that it contains a public statement by GAAMC’s Board of Trustees, it is solely the opinion of the author.


Page 2 CHALLENGE May 2010 CHALLENGE Volume 36, Number 4 May 2010 ISSN 0277-1675 Staff Editor .....................Allen Neuner Assistant Editor ............. Bill Stella Advertising Manager ............. open Circulation Manager ............. open List Manager ................ Sue Harris Submissions The deadline for all articles, inserts, and advertisements is the fifteenth of the previous month. All submissions must be provided as electronic files. E-mail submissions to Challenge AT GAAMC.org. Ad Rates Single issue: Full page, $125.00; Half page, $85.00; Quarter page, $45.00; Business card, $25.00. For multi-issue rates, contact the Editor. GAAMC members may place one free classified ad per month, of no more than 200 characters in length. Change of Address All address changes should be sent to the List Manager at ChangeAddress AT GAAMC.org. Challenge is © 2010-2011 by the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, a 501(c)3 tax-exempt not-for-profit corporation. All rights reserved. All articles reflect the views of the original contributors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of GAAMC, its officers, or executive board. All copyrights revert to the original contributors upon publication. No portion of this publication may be reproduced without the express written permission of the contributor. All articles, contributions, and advertisements are printed at the discretion of the Editor and/or GAAMC Executive Board.

GAAMC Events Every Monday 7:00 Dining Room Circles-NJ Discussion Group This is a closed discussion group, lasting roughly twelve weeks, with a limited number of participants. Moderator: Gordon Sauer. Note: There will be no Circles group on May 17th. 7:00 Library OpenTalk Discussion Group This is a regular weekly discussion group, open to all. Moderators: Elias Scultori, Kerry Dinkin, Sherri Rase.

Main Events May 3: Please join us at GAAMC when the dynamic Stephanie Battaglino speaks to us and provides a screening of her episode from the GLAAD award-nominated documentary series Sex Change Hospital. Stephanie will discuss her involvement in the project and her experiences with it from its inception through its airing on the Women's Entertainment (We TV) network in the fall of 2008. There will be a question and answer session after the screening as well. Please plan on joining Stephanie for an informative and enlightening evening.   May 10:  Baritone Dale Livingston has appeared at an impressive array of performance spaces ranging from the Montclair Art Museum to Alice Tully Hall at Lincoln Center. He has sung leading roles in oratorios, is a frequent soloist with the Choral Art Society of New Jersey and Calvary Chorale, and is presently a soloist at First Congregational Church in Montclair. Tonight, this talented GAAMC member shares his gift with us in a recital program with something for everyone. Don’t miss it!   May 17: What do you get when you combine an attorney, a published author, a public safety director, a parent of two grown kids, and a comedian?  You get Terry Bogorad, GAAMC’s featured speaker tonight. Pride has many faces and not all of them garner smiles. Terry is going to show us how to be more aware of our surroundings and how to protect ourselves and our friends during one of the biggest months in the LGBTI calendar, Pride Month in June. Deputy Director of the Department of Public Safety at William Paterson University, Terry is expert in helping defuse confrontation with civility and humor. You owe it to yourself to be with us so mark your calendars now!   May 24: GAAMC Film Festival continues with the cult favorite Boondock Saints. What do two brothers who go on a killing spree have in common with a light-in-the-loafers FBI agent? Come find out and see one of the most interesting and quirky movies ever.  Dark, gritty, and urban, this movie make you look at everything a bit differently. May 31: GAAMC pulls out all the stops to kick off summer in style!  The Social Committee is putting together our annual Memorial Day Social where GAAMC provides burgers, veggie burgers, hot dogs, rolls, and condiments and you bring your pic-a-nic specialty!  Is it your ambrosia that makes everyone go ape? Does your red velvet cake make people blush? Did you put the "fruit" in fruit salad?  It’s time to show off! Let Charlie know what you’re bringing – send an email to Socials AT GAAMC.org. We’ll see you here!

Coming Next Month! June 7: GAAMC is full of innovations and even more so during Pride Month! There is a new group forming at GAAMC for men of experience and tonight's guests include the primary forces behind that group. In addition, our Discussion Group Resources chair, Gordon Sauer, and facilitators Elias Scultori and Sherri Rase will talk about the many offerings our discussion groups will bring throughout the summer and into the fall. Don’t miss it! We’ll also be sharing stories of our experiences from Sunday, June 6!   June 14: June is Pride Month and the Social Committee is holding GAAMC's Big LGBTI Social in the Terrace Room.  Ring out wild bells and open the doors for the sunshine – dress to impress in your best Pride and summer duds and have a great time with the ragingly beautiful GAAMC habitués!


May 2010 CHALLENGE Page 3

The Bulletin Board GAAMC members and friends will carry panels of the AIDS Memorial Quilt in the Pride Parade in Asbury Park on June 6th. Our goal is to carry 3 of the 12' x 12' panels. This will require 25 volunteers.  We'll convene  at the parade's starting point at approximately 11:30.  After marching the 1.5-mile route to the Pride Festival grounds, we'll take the panels right to The Names Project's tent.  Each member of our team will get a white GAAMC tshirt to wear on the march.  If you are available to  participate, please contact Andy Skurna at President AT GAAMC.org. 20/30-Something Group to be Started at GAAMC:     The Discussion Group Resources Committee is planning to start a 20/30-something discussion group in the next few months.  We are now looking for men and women to serve as group facilitators.  If interested, please contact Gordon Sauer at discussions AT gaamc.org or at any GAAMC meeting. Join Hudson Pride Connections on May 1st to celebrate the annual HPC Gala! Funds raised at the Gala are used to support the Hudson Pride Connections Center, a community services center dedicated to meeting the needs of the LGBT communities and all people living with HIV in Hudson County. Tickets are $60/person, $110/couple. For more information, or to order tickets, go to www.brownpapertickets.com/event/102993. Asbury Park's QSpot announces the formation of the first Jersey Pride Marching Band for 2010! The band, whose mission is to promote the interests of the GLBTIQ commuities of Monmouth and Ocean counties and Asbury Park, will be holding full band rehearsals May 2nd. For more information, call 732-604-1791; to participate, contact info AT jsqspot.org. New Jersey Buddies is sponsoring the Twelfth Annual AIDS Walk - Northern New Jersey at the Saddle River County Park in Ridgewood on May 1st. This 5K walkathon is raising funds to meet the growing needs of people living with HIV/AIDS in northern New Jersey. For more information, to pledge, or to participate, go to www.njbuddies.org or call 201489-2900. Join Chillfest on Sunday, May 9th, for their fifth anniversary event! The featured movie is The Lady in Question Is Charles Busch, a witty and entertaining documentary about the life and career of the famed playwright and performer, which won the Best Documentary award at the 2007 International Gay and Lesbian Film Festival. For more information, or to order tickets, go to www.myspace.com/chillfestjerseycity. Hudson Pride Connections and JCLGO present their Third Annual Health Fair on Saturday, May 15th, in Jersey City. The fair includes free HIV testing, massage therapy, raffles, giveaways, and BBQ food! For more information, contact Tyree at 201-963-4779, extension 155. In case of bad weather, the rain date is the following Saturday, May 22nd.

The Jersey Shore QSPOT invites you to their third annual Pride Dinner and Dance on June 5th at the Berkeley Oceanfront Hotel! The festivities include a Carnival themed reception, cocktail hour, and dinner dance. Special overnight rates are available at the hotel for those who wish to stay and get an early start on the next day's Pride parade and celebration. For tickets or for more information, call QSPOT at 732-604-1791. The Legends Dinner, Garden State Equality's annual gala benefit, will occur on Saturday, June 26th at the Maplewood Country Club. This black tie event will include an opulent smorgasbord, jazz, and cocktail hour, a sit-down dinner, and an after-dinner party with dancing. Celebrities include Gary Beach, Sandra Bernhard, Christine Ebersole, Lee Roy Reams, Anwar Robinson, and the cast of "Forbidden Broadway". Honorees include Senator Frank Lautenberg, state senators Bill Baroni, Nia Gill, and Raymond Lesniak, John Otto III, and Marsha Shapiro and Louise Walpin. Tickets are on sale now, so please save the date! For more information, or to order tickets, go to gardenstateequality.org/legends2010.html. Right now, the weather outside is still a little chilly. But things are heating up for JCLGO's 10th Annual Pride Festival on August 28th! This year, the theme is "Standing Strong - Equality for All". Also, for the first time, there will be a march for full equality preceding the Pride Festival, running from Grove Street and Christopher Columbus Drive, past City Hall, and down Montgomery Street onto the Festival grounds! For more information about the Pride Festival, go to jclgo.org. To be part of the march, contact marchdirector AT jclgo.org.

Getting Personal FOR SALE: Roof Bars for 2002 Jetta – fits other model years as well.  Excellent Condition, first $150 OBO takes ‘em.  Email Sherri at Info AT GAAMC.org for more details and to make arrangements for pick up!

This Month's Contributors Anthony Agabatt lives with his husbear, Kevin King, in Metuchen. Terri Bogorad is the Public Safety Officer at William Paterson University. Bill Realman Stella writes Dancing to Architecture because writing about music is like that. He hosted the eclectic pop music show Highest Common Denominator in his mind for twenty years before getting it on the radio for six, and will host it again. Bill has been collecting music since age 4, when for each song he'd hear on the radio, he'd ask his mom, "Do they have a record?" Making a record good enough to play on the radio remains a small miracle after all these years. If you'd like Bill to write, DJ, or promote for you, get in touch. Comments and suggestions also welcome. Please send your correspondences to bearealman AT gmail.com.


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Gleanings

Queer news from around the world Kathy Gerus-Darbison, co-chair of a blood safety committee for the National Hemophilia Foundation, is standing in opposition to lifting the lifetime ban on men who have sex with men as blood donors. Gerus-Darbison's husband was a hemophiliac who died from transfusion-related AIDS, which was passed on to her. (Los Angeles Times) Restore Equality 2010, a group working to repeal California's marriage-equality ban, was not able to gather enough signatures to put a question to repeal Proposition 8 on the 2010 ballot. Organizers vowed to work towards getting a similar question on the 2012 ballot. (San Francisco Chronicle) The White House ordered the Department of Health and Human Services to draw up rules allowing patients to decide who can visit them in the hospital. The rules, which would allow same-sex partners of patients to visit over the objections of family members, affect any hospital receiving Medicaid or Medicare funding. (CNN) Legislative language for ENDA has been finalized, according to Representative Barney Frank (D-MA). The bill will be ready for committee debate by early May. Frank is encouraging the GLBT community to increase their calls to the 16 uncommitted Democratic Senators if the legislation has any chance of passing. (DCAgenda; Advocate.com) The Supreme Court heard arguments in a case involving a Christian group with a policy denying membership to gays. The group is suing a public law school in California for not recognizing and subsidizing it. Questioning by the justices suggest the Court is sharply divided over the issue of whether religion-based groups seeking public funding can discriminate against those not sharing their beliefs. (Associated Press; USA Today) The Department of Justice filed a brief in the case Log Cabin Republicans v. United States stating that the "don't ask, don't tell" policy should not be rescinded because of concerns about the privacy rights of the troops. The suit seeks to overturn the policy as an unconstitutional infringement on LGBT service members' First Amendment rights. Experts on privacy rights from the Palm Center, a think tank at the University of California, blasted the DoJ for completely misstating their views on privacy rights concerns related to "don't ask, don't tell" in the brief. White House press secretary Robert Gibbs also took issue with the brief's inclusion of arguments made in 1993 by Colin Powell which Powell later renounced. (DCAgenda; Advocate.com; The Politico) Marriage applications in the District of Columbia have skyrocketed since the District started issuing licenses for samesex couples. About 1,100 marriage applications have been filed since March 3rd, nearly six times the average monthly count, according to courthouse spokeswoman Leah Gurowitz. (Washington Examiner) Hundreds of protesters in Los Angeles demanded equalization of Social Security benefits for same-sex couples in domestic partnerships, civil unions, or marriages. Representatives Linda Sanchez (D-CA) and Judy Chu (D-CA) said at the event they would co-write legislation to change Social Security Administration policy. (Los Angeles Times)

Air Force Lt. Robin Chaurasiya, a lesbian in a civil union with another woman, was not discharged from the military by her commander, Lt. Gen. Robert Allardyce, after Allardyce received a copy of an e-mail in which Chaurasiya revealed her sexual orientation and civil union status. Allardyce claimed Chaurasiya, who did not deny writing the email, revealed her sexual orientation solely to avoid military service, which is considered by some officers as an exception to the "don't ask, don't tell" policy. Chaurasiya denies Allardyce's claim. (Los Angeles Times) Army Secretary John McHugh told reporters he misspoke when he said gay troops would not be discharged for participating in a Pentagon study about implementing a repeal of the "don't ask, don't tell" policy. McHugh said the policy remains law until Congress repeals it, and that he and the Department of the Army are obliged to uphold it. (New York Times) Retired US NATO Commander John Sheehan issued a written apology for his comments at a Senate hearing linking the Dutch army's failure to stop genocide in Srebrenica to the presence of out military personnel. The apology was sent to retired Dutch General Hank van den Breemen. (Associated Press; Agence France-Presse) The San Francisco Board of Supervisors voted to approve a $157,500 loan to help the city's LGBT Community Center with its mortgage. The money will be used as a reserve fund to be tapped if the center can't pay its mortgage; any funds used would be repaid to the city with 1 per cent interest. (San Francisco Chronicle) Oklahoma state Representative Mike Shelton (D) withdrew his version of a bill to stop state and local officials from cooperating with federal authorities investigating hate crimes against homosexuals, effectively killing it. Shelton took over as the bill's House author with the intention of stopping the bill. The bill's Senate author, Steve Russell (R), said he will seek to use House rules to revive the measure. (The Oklahoman) A judge in Argentina annulled the first gay marriage in Latin America, citing an article in the country's civil code forbidding marriage between two people of the same sex. The married couple, Alex Freyre and Jose Maria De Bello, plan to appeal the decision. (Agence France-Presse) Iceland's legislature is considering a bill that would establish marriage rights for same-sex couples. The bill was submitted by the government of Prime Minister Jóhanna Sigurđardóttir, the world's first openly LGBT head of government. (SDGLN.com (San Diego)) Ang Ladlad, a gay-oriented political party in the Philippines, will be allowed to participate in national elections. The Philippine Supreme Court overturned a ruling of the Elections Commission which banned the party because it could offend religious groups. (Associated Press) Approximately 300 gay Iranians have left the country since Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was elected president. Many have fled to Turkey where homosexuality is tolerated, scattered in numerous smaller cities while seeking asylum in such countries as Canada, Australia, and the United States. (Washington Post)


May 2010 CHALLENGE Page 5

May 2010 Calendar

Recurring Contact Information *Hackensack

Peer Support Groups: 800-508-7577; njbuddies AT aol.com Center, Highland Park: 732-846-2232; www.pridecenter.org ‡Hudson County Peer Support Groups: 201-963-4779; HCP AT HudsonPride.org λLGBT Center Rainbow Lounge, Princeton: www.princeton.edu/lgbt †Pride

Monday – Friday 9:00 am to 1:00 pm – HIV testing, Asbury Park; 800-947-0020 9:00 am to 11:00 am - The Daily Grind coffeehouse, Princetonλ Every Monday 7:30 pm – GAAMC, Morristown (see page 2) 10:00 am – "Generation Q", WRSU 88.7 FM; wrsu.org 10:30 am – The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info AT hyacinth.org 2:00 pm - Sex in the Center, Princetonλ 7:00 pm – Bowling, Union; merenl AT comcast.net 7:30 pm – S.E.L.F. HIV Men’s support group, Hackensack* 7:30 pm – New Jersey Gay Men’s Chorus choir practice, Princeton; 609-396-7774; www.njgmc.org 7:30 pm – Overeaters Anonymous, Pride Center† 8:00 pm – Bowling, Green Brook; 732-388-3548; qcrollers AT aol.com Every Tuesday 12:30 pm – The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info AT hyacinth.org 1:00 pm – HIV Support Group, Hackensack* 2:00 pm - Sex in the Center, Princetonλ 4:00 pm – Treatment Adherence Support Group, Jersey City; 201-432-1134; info AT hyacinth.org 6:00 pm – GLITZ, Jersey City‡ 6:30 pm – Fresh Start HIV Trans support group, Jersey City‡ 7:30 pm – Tuesday Night Lesbian Connection, Bound Brook; 908-791-3764 7:30 pm – Men’s HIV support group, Asbury Park; 732-7755084; apstillpoz AT yahoo.com 8:45 pm – Bowling, Belleville; 973-256-5936; NJGLB AT aol.com 9:00 pm – Bowling, Jersey City; 201-933-6028; JoeyNJ AT aol.com 01 Sat 9:00 am - AIDS Walk, Ridgewood (see Bulletin Board, page 3) 2:30 pm – HiTOPS 1st & 3rd for GLBTI Youth, Princeton; 609683-5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:00 pm – Women's Coffeehouse, Pride Center† 7:00 pm - Hudson Pride Connections Gala, Jersey City (see Bulletin Board, page 3) 02 Sun Noon - Jersey Pride Marching Band rehearsal, Asbury Park (see Bulletin Board, page 3) 4:00 pm – Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-857-4040; Dignitymetronj AT msn.com 6:30 pm – Gay Men’s Opera Club; 732-249-9034; hagol AT msn.com 03 Mon 7:00 pm – Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero AT umdnj.edu 04 Tue 6:00 pm –- Gay Pride Business Network, New Brunswick; www.gpbn.net

9:15 pm – Bowling, Edison; 732-548-4550; cnjgbl AT yahoo.com Every Wednesday 10:30 am – The Wellness Community, Jersey City; 201-4321134; info AT hyacinth.org 6:00 pm – Positive People peer support group, Hackensack* 7:30 pm – Men’s Living Out group, Pride Center; njwarrior AT aol.com† 7:30 pm – Men’s Coming Out group, Pride Center; njwarrior AT aol.com† Every Thursday 6:00 pm — Pride Thursdays, Hard Grove Cafe Bar, Jersey City; jclgo.org 6:00 pm - Our Youth weekly support group, Jersey City; www.myspace.com/our_youth 6:30 pm – Double Jeopardy peer support group, Hackensack* 6:30 pm – Living Beyond HIV Men's peer support groups, Jersey City‡ 7:30 pm – Rainbows on Cleveland Street, Orange; 973-2565936; rbowsoncleveland AT aol.com 7:30 pm -- Writers Group, Pride Center† Every Friday 3:00 pm - Tea at Three, Princetonλ 3:30 pm – Youth Connect, Jersey City‡ Every Saturday 3:30 pm – Youth Connect, Jersey City‡ Every Sunday 10:30 am – MCC of Christ the Liberator, North Brunswick; 732-846-8227; mccliberator AT excite.com 2:30 pm – Liberation in Truth Unity Fellowship Church, Newark; 973-621-2100 7:00 pm -- ComeOUT & Play, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – LGBT Fellowship, Belleville; 973-751-0616 7:30 pm — PCNJ Board of Trustees meeting, Pride Center† 05 Wed 7:30 pm -- Gay Dad's Coming Out/Support Group, Pride Center† 06 Thu 7:30 pm – Alternate Thursdays East, Montclair; kjdinkin AT comcast.net 07 Fri 7:00 pm – Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 7:00 pm - Under the Rainbow, Pride Center† 7:00 pm - Karaoke Party, Pride Center† 8:30 pm - Time for Me, Pride Center† 08 Sat 1:00 pm – Youth Drop-In, Pride Center† 2:00 pm - Lavender Graduation, Princetonλ 7:00 pm – Movie Social, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – Dignity New Brunswick gay Catholic liturgy; 732968-9263; dignitynb AT earthlink.net


Page 6 CHALLENGE May 2010 09 Sun 1:30 pm – PFLAG Northern New Jersey, South Orange; 973267-8414; www.pflagnorthjersey.org 4:00 pm -- Chillfest film festival, Jersey City; www.myspace.com/chillfestjerseycity (see Bulletin Board, page 3) 6:00 pm – Gay Men’s Classical Song Club, Kingston; pbrown02 AT worldnet.att.net 10 Mon 7:30 pm – PFLAG of Morris County, Mendham; 973-5437229; craig.bcc AT verizon.net 7:30 pm – PFLAG, Princeton; 609-663-5155; www.pflagprinceton.org 11 Tue 3:00 pm – Health Center Drop-In, Princetonλ 8:00 pm – Lesbians and Gay Men of New Brunswick, Pride Center† 12 Wed 7:30 pm – TGLCA monthly meeting, Trenton; 609-396-9788; tglca AT aol.com 9:00 pm -- Dine with Pride, Metuchen ; jennifer.horsey AT cit.com

7:00 pm - Art Space, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – NJ Women Coming Out Support Group, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – Alternate Thursdays West, Denville; kjdinkin2comcast.net 21 Fri 7:00 pm – Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 7:00 pm – NJ Furries Art Workshop, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – Dignity New Brunswick social; 732-968-9263; dignitynb AT earthlink.net 8:00 pm – “Out of the Box” open mic night, The Cave, 19-21 Second Avenue, Highland Park (sign-up begins 7:30) 22 Sat 11:00 am - Hike-Nics, Clinton (see article, page 7) 1:00 pm – Youth Drop-In, Pride Center† 2:00 pm – Strategy Games Group, Edison; www.pridecenter.org 2:00 pm – Youth Support Group, Pride Center† 7:00 pm – Gay Bowling, Asbury Lanes, Asbury Park; 732-776-6160 7:00 pm – Men's Games Night & Dessert, Pride Center† 24 Mon 6:00 pm - LGBT international dinner, Princetonλ

13 Thu 6:30 pm – RainboWomen, Pride Center†

25 Tue 8:00 pm – Lesbians and Gay Men of New Brunswick, Pride Center†

14 Fri 7:00 pm – Foreign Film Fest, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – NJ LGBT Cancer Support Group, Pride Center†

26 Wed 6:00 pm – Queering the Color Line Family Dinner, Princetonλ

15 Sat All Day - Deadline for submissions to Challenge Noon - Health Fair, Jersey City (see Bulletin Board, page 3) 2:30 pm – HiTOPS 1st & 3rd for GLBTI Youth, Princeton; 609683-5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:00 pm – Rainbow Bowling, Bradley Beach; 732-774-4540 7:00 pm – NJ Gay Film Society & Potluck Dinner Club, location TBA; gayfilms AT bigfoot.com 16 Sun 4:00 pm – Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-837-4040; Dignitymetronj AT msn.com 4:00 pm – TrueSelves trans support group, Pride Center† 17 Mon 7:00 pm – Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero AT umdnj.edu

27 Thu 6:30 pm — RainboWomen, Pride Center† 28 Fri 7:30 pm — Release from the Closet, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – Crocheting for a Cause, Pride Center† 31 Mon 8:30 pm – Meditation Group, Pride Center†

KEVIN P. SUSZKO, PC Certified Public Accountant

18 Tue 6:00 pm – Gay Pride Business Network, New Brunswick; www.gpbn.net 7:00 pm – ComeOUT & Play, Pride Center† 7:30 pm – Lesbian Alliance of Princeton; 609-924-8174; Loisj AT msn.com 7:30 pm – PFLAG of Hunterdon County; 908-812-1558; pflaghc AT yahoo.com 8:00 pm – PFLAG Bergen County; 201-287-0318; www.pflag-bergennj.org 8:00 pm – NJ Women, Secaucus; info AT njwomen.org

-TAX PLANNING & PREPARATION -FINANCIAL PLANNING -ACCOUNTING SERVICES -DAY & EVENING APPOINTMENTS -OFFICES IN NEW JERSEY & NYC

19 Wed 7:30 pm – United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez AT comcast.net 8:00 pm – Capital Rainbowfest planning meeting, Trenton; capitalr AT capitalrainbowfest.org

Phone: 973–376–4121 P. O. Box 701 Short Hills, NJ 07078 E-Mail: KPSCPA@COMCAST.NET

20 Thu 7:00 pm – GAAMC board meeting, Morristown; all GAAMC members are invited to attend.


May 2010 CHALLENGE Page 7

Coconut Curried Chicken by Chef Anthony Agabatt

4 lbs. boneless skinless chicken, cubed Half a stick of butter 4 tbsp. olive oil 1 large sweet onion, chopped Powdered curry or curry paste 1 heaping tsp. chicken base or 4 bullion cubes 1 can coconut milk 1 lb. rice of your choice 3 cans diced water chestnuts

1 tbsp. chili oil 1 tsp. sesame oil 2 tbsp. soy sauce 1 tsp. hot curry powder 1 tsp. ground ginger Toasted sesame seeds Crunchy noodles Naan or flat bread

In a pot no smaller than 5 quarts, over medium heat, combine half a stick of butter, 4 tablespoons of olive oil, and one large chopped sweet onion and sauté until onions turn a translucent golden color. Add 4 lbs. of boneless skinless chicken cubes to the pot. Cook chicken, stirring regularly until cooked throughout. Add a powdered curry or curry paste and 1 heaping teaspoon of chicken base or 4 bullion cubes. Cover chicken with 1 inch of water and bring to a boil on medium high heat, stirring often. (Now is a good time to start cooking the rice and preparing the water chestnuts.) When the liquid in the chicken pot has reduced to the top of the chicken, add 1 can of coconut milk and stir well. Taste the chicken, adjusting seasoning to taste. Bring chicken mixture to a slow boil, and then reduce heat to low and simmer for about 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. In a serving bowl, put chicken mixture on top of rice. Top as desired with spicy fried water chestnuts, toasted sesame seeds, and crunchy noodles. Serve with spicy fried water chestnuts, toasted sesame seeds, and crunchy noodles as toppings; serve with lightly toasted buttered naan or flat bread if desired. Spicy Fried Water Chestnuts: Drain and rinse 3 cans of diced water chestnuts. In a sauce pan on medium high heat, combine a tablespoon of chili oil and 1 teaspoon of sesame oil. When the oil is hot add the water chestnuts. Toss and fry the water chestnuts until hot and sizzling. Add 2 tablespoons of soy sauce to the water chestnuts; continue to toss and fry until soy begins to reduce. Add 1 teaspoon of hot curry powder and 1 teaspoon of ground ginger to the water chestnuts. Coat the chestnuts evenly and cook for 3 to 5 minutes, stirring often.

Join the Hike-Nics! Hike-nics aren’t official GAAMC events, but rather events organized by one or more GAAMC members.  Typically, a small group of 8 to 14 men and women get together to share low-impact hikes, walks, and picnics throughout New Jersey and eastern Pennsylvania.  Most trips are either free or have extremely low admission rates.  All participants are responsible for their own transportation and safety.  If you’d like to learn more, please email Ed Schell at sche357 AT aol.com. Here's a list of our upcoming events: May 22nd - Round Valley State Park: At 11:30 AM we’ll gather to take a hike/walk at Round Valley State Park near Clinton, followed by a picnic.  June - Stickley Museum & Craftsman Farms: Nearby Morris Plains holds a little treasure that too few have discovered.  We aim to change that.  Join us for an edutaining afternoon at the home and workshop of Gustav Stickley, a leader of the Arts and Crafts design movement. July - Schooley’s Mountain County Park: Nestled among the hills of western Morris County, Schooley's Mountain Park offers visitors 797 acres of active and passive recreation facilities.  Come take a hike, then enjoy a picnic. August - Tubing down the Delaware River: Once again we’re taking the plunge!  Join some of your friends from GAAMC as we take to the waters.  This is a great way to cool off those dog days of August.

Ten Safety Tips by Terry Bogorad

1. Carry only what you need on your person. 2. Store all personal identification materials (Social Security Card, Passport) in a secured area. 3. Keep your computer identification information a secret. 4. Post only general information about yourself on the internet. 5. Pose only for pictures that you want circulated. 6. Remember that a dominating person begins by controlling your conversation. 7. Ignore your instincts only after you have found three good reasons to do so. 8. Know where you can exit a building and where you can find help within a building. 9. Use your cellular telephone as a safety tool by calling someone when you are in a strange area and talking to the person until you have arrived at a safe place. 10. Listen to what is being said and what is not being said. (Editor's note: Terry Bogorad will be our featured speaker on May 17th.)


Page 8 CHALLENGE May 2010

Dancing to Architecture™

Music reviews & news with Queer ears by Bill Realman Stella My queer ears are oriented toward hetero creators a mite bit more this month than usual. (They ain't dishing about their lives — neither sexual nor romantic — to me.) But for those few out artists who I mention below, I can't vouch for anyone's sexuality. But I don't rule out anything about anyone either. Meanwhile, these first three albums are contenders for Top 10 Best of 2010.

Shelby Lynne ~ Tears, Lies, and Alibis

Shelby Lynne is a modern master of the recording studio, and her new Tears, Lies, and Alibis is a clear early front-runner for Best Album of 2010. Tears, Lies, and Alibis simply accomplishes an incredibly rare feat, that of a mature talent in intimate contact with her muse and in control of her career (this is her first release on her own label, Everso Records), recording an album of great songs with great performances — and nary a one that's skippable. These masterful miniatures have just the right balance of every good thing in contemporary music that would cause me to fall head over heels in love with an album. And I have fallen in love with TLA. Lynne writes and records in the great American tradition of assimilating pieces of a variety of cultures into a new, from-the-heart creation. She solicits contributions from C&W's Western Swing and Bluegrass styles, from mainstream Country Pop, from Contemporary Acoustic Folk, from Roots Rock and Tin Pan Alley. She invokes what's required as needed. It's no checklist of fashionable trends. It's the substance on which the entire recipe depends. It's not just for spice, but it sure is for flavor. She bakes for her own pleasure. For the aroma alone, you'll want to be in her kitchen. The sounds from in there are inviting.

The Hold Steady ~ Heaven Is Whenever

Characteristically iambic phrase after iambic phrase, anthem upon anthem, with Heaven Is Whenever, The Hold Steady come as close as they ever have to delivering a classic rock and roll album. But I can't focus on the macroevent of a monster-to-be in the making. That way leads to heartache (See Graham Parker, monsterto-be deferred of 1978, '79 and '80, the vocal godfather to The Hold Steady's lead singer Craig Finn, and whose newest fine album Imaginary Television has just come out.) So let me focus MY GAWD on DID HE JUST SING ABOUT THE BAND HUSKER DU IN THE ALBUM'S LOVE SONG? "We Can Get Together," an alluringly beautiful song's lyric provides the album title. AND it references Bob Mould's seminal band AND "Paradise By The Dashboard Light" AND Todd Rundgren's band Utopia's "Love Is The Answer"! Meanwhile, the departure of keyboardist Franz Nicolay (for a while the man behind the 'boards with brilliant but oft overlooked cabaretrockers The World Inferno Friendship Society) means the keys have been toned down, replaced by thick heaps of guitars. Release date: May 4. Exclusive first listen at NPR: tinyurl.com/y7r9bpf. TheHoldSteady.net

Ted Leo and the Pharmacists ~ The Brutalist Bricks

"‘Bricks’ could be the most confident, kinetic and varied work in Ted’s canon, and considering his body of work until now…." That’s a lot for Leo's label (Matador) to claim, but that's the blurbage they're standing behind. It's not merely hype. Buzzy-bee album art is not the only "cover" by which you might well judge this music's first impression: Just look at some of the song titles: “The Mighty Sparrow”, “Even Heroes Have to Die”, “Where Was My Brain?”, “Bartolomeo and the Buzzing of Bees”, “Gimme the Wire” — even “Mourning in America” is a take-active-control and take action title. Not to say The Brutalist Bricks is music heard once, judged easily and tossed. Ted Leo and the Pharmacists' reliability is another of their canon's qualities, music that never trades punk's energy for intelligence deficit disorder. Leo's songs have one of the highest Earned Punch Averages in rock and roll. Their catalog's consistent high quality will amaze you. This set evokes a variety of memorable markers in rock history. One can hear riffs lifted (with love and respect) out of the catalogs of everyone from My Aim Is Trueera Elvis Costello, to early-70s pre-punk party bands like Thin Lizzy, to acoustic Led Zep. But the most frequent touchstone is early Joe Jackson Band: Tight-cut punk guitar shards relentlessly slash across rankin' riffs rife with reggae/ska backbeats and motivate a restless dissatisfaction with the song style worn the last time out — one must procreate a new style into existence with every new song. Strike your blow against the vapid, and land your copy of this worthy addition to their nervy oeuvre as soon as you can. Learn more at TedLeo.com.

Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings ~ I Learned the Hard Way

Hooray! This set returns to full form the best soul singer you haven't heard yet and the best R&B outfit you have heard but haven't realized was them. (They're the band on most of Amy Winehouse's monster Back To Black album, along with other appearances elsewhere.) SJ&TDK's last album was good, but just wasn't as great as Naturally — the previous one. I Learned the Hard Way is the album SJ&TDK deserves now — as does their fans. I like the songs on ILTHW a lot: The kind of love in these songs is the kind earned the hard way; it's no romantic picnic. Nothing here is less than soulful and creative. But nothing is on fire with inspiration, nothing jumps out and shouts "Breakthrough Hit!" neither. And I keep wishing for one, a hit that will put the names Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings in the hearts and on the tongue-tips of just about everyone. They deserve a taste of that kind of success too. Meanwhile, we'll just have to make do with the new video for the title track. See it at SharonJonesandthe DapKings.com/ecard/video1.html. Don't be too disappointed, after you hear her sing about a phone answered "with a gasp and a click", to discover the next line does not rhyme. (Instead it's "Was that wrong number wrong, or was she after your… love?") Based on their in-concert performances — and the comments I've seen about them —


May 2010 CHALLENGE Page 9 what we fans must clamor for is a big official live album. Catch this while you can: NPR.org has a full set of SJ&TDK in concert at Austin, TX's SXSW Festival from earlier this year. That spirit and fire I have the nerve to yearn for out loud (in print)? You can get a taste, a feel for it at npr.org/templates/story/story.php? storyId=124091931. It has that extra special live performance smoke that I know SJ&TDK cooks with because I got to see SJ&TDKs in concert myself (Allen's anniversary gift to me a few years back.) And after the show Sharon Jones kissed my cheek: In my imagination, that kiss has never washed off.

Galactic ~ Ya-Ka-May

I've been meaning to review Ya-Ka-May since February for y'all, and regret not getting to it sooner, so you could have sought it out by now. It's a fine N'awlins concoction, every available flavor gathered from the hands, minds and hearts of every available Louisiana-phile the band could muster, run through a deep current of what's going down right now, and served piping hot. Galactic started out over a decade ago as an instrumental act in the tradition of the Meters, the JB's, and Booker T. & the MG's bands equally comfortable recording their own material or working with vocalists. This time out Galactic hosts over a dozen guest vocalists. Quoting musician/author/musicologist Ned Sublette extensively: "This is some post-flood musical reality from a 291-year-old city that’s had a near-death experience.

This is not your grandfather's New Orleans record. "New Orleans isn’t the same city it was five years ago, and it’s the same city it’s always been. Both these statements are true. One thing’s for sure: these days no one takes New Orleans for granted. And for all its problems – like, when are we going to take care of the wetlands that protect the city? – it’s in a good moment of music. This record shows you how alive New Orleans is, right now. "New Orleans music is above all about community. You see your friends, and there’s music there. It’s a social process. Every Sunday you can go on a second line, an ambulatory block party where thousands of people come together to strut down the street, pushed along by a brass band or six. Those parades have been going since the 19th century, and they’re alive and strong today, and to me that means New Orleans is alive and strong. "...[A]ll the times and genres are present at once. But there’s a lingua franca that ties it all together: in New Orleans, whatever your ostensible style of music, it’s gonna come out funky. "Which brings me to Galactic. They’re an instrumental band, ...but they love to collaborate with vocalists. And why limit yourself to just one when the whole damn town is ready to sing?... "Ya-Ka-May features all-new material generated by the band in collaboration with a stellar series of guests, who range from iconic figures of the 1960s to the younger veterans to the underground. These invitees appear here outside their normal contexts and away from the sound you might typically associate with them, like putting a picture in a different frame. "Guaranteed you know some of their names, but it’s unlikely that you know them all, even if you live in New Orleans, so you’re about to discover scorching talents from the worlds of music you know – and one you may not have encountered before: bounce. …[H]iphop, which in New Orleans grows out of a local style called bounce, is part of the New Orleans music family. To have Rebirth Brass Band, Irma Thomas, Allen Toussaint, Trombone Shorty and Corey Henry [among Ya-Ka-May's guest artists] together with Cheeky Blakk, Big Freedia, Katey Red, and Sissy Nobby – now that’s New Orleans. Those last three names are part of an energetic local gender-bending music scene where sissy (their word) rappers write and perform bounce music -- something new that’s also something old, in a town long known for what used to be called “female impersonators.” (Emphasis added.) For all its variety, the finished composition avoids the specialguests pitfall of a disjointed collection, because 1) it’s all New Orleans, baby, and 2) as strong as the personalities of the guests are, this is Galactic’s album and they tie it all together. It’s an experiment that works.... "And the title? ... Ya-Ka-May is ...the name of a soup of Chinese origin that’s been an Afro-Orleanian specialty for years...." Ya-Ka-May is music you can play to get you in the mood while waiting for Treme to come on HBO. Or to hold onto the mood after Treme is over. Or to taste some of that unique, constantly evolving, bayou, New Orleans, funkified gumbo flavor whenever

you feel like some. Hear the entire album stream at Paste Magazine's site: pastemagazine.com/blogs/av/2010/01/listen-to-galactics-new-alb um-ya-ka-may.html

Coheed & Cambria ~ Year of the Black Rainbow

Five albums into a career as heirs-apparent to the complex melodic hard rock of Rush, the musicians of C+C pick up the helm (from where Rush by and large left it) not with Rush imitations (with a track or section or uncannily Geddy Leelike falsetto vocal excepted here and there) but by doing the right thing: heeding their inner voices' creative sparks to bring a rich balance of engaging ideas and out-there skills to capture the listener's imagination; to uncage your repressed headbanger. I really love the track "Far," with its theme of love transcending physical distance reflected in the outer spacey guitar soloing's contrasts with the steady, buzzy signal riffing of an arpeggiated guitar line. "Made Out of Nothing (All That I Am)" is another highlight, a ringing anthemic vow of a song. It's followed by another highlight, the unusually pretty "Pearl of the Stars," which deftly sidesteps the pitfalls of becoming the obligatory power-ballad. C+C suffer from the unfair disadvantage my generation puts newer rockers in, a kind of precedent trap that gives no room to those bands who follow none-too-closely in a successful band's footsteps. Without that breathing room, these bands suffer by comparison. I prefer to see the new bands — and comparisons to older ones — as starting points, not molds. I'm a fan of Rush, but I'm glad new bands — especially C+C — sound not like revival or nostalgia bands but like they're tapping veins previous explorers just didn't discover.

They're tapping veins previous explorers just didn't discover.

Jonsi ~ Go

Maybe some of the most blissfully beautiful newborn music that exists, maybe some of the most mysterious and ephemerous, but my inner jury is still deliberating over Sigur Ros band-member and Out Gay man Jonsi's new solo debut album Go. "Boy Lilikoi" is a flittering, jittery rococo intertwining of flutes and beats and bowings and plucks, all swelling, all gliding. This hypereuphony often rises on the wings of Jonsi's gorgeous voice into a proverbial fever pitch, seeming to generate its own shine at the moment prior to searing its speeding elements into a harmonicsrich tonal singularity. "Go Do" is every bit as hiking-downhill pastoral as its "surrender to summer" lyric. Driven by vocals reaching for boy soprano territory, "Grow Till Tall" roots itself in the longerheld atmospherics more familiar to Sigur Ros fans, before tipping into a staccato stampede of snares and fuzzy static. (Yes, I wrote those descriptions: It's the truth of what I hear. I stand behind them.) Go listen to these three tracks and the rest of "Go" yourself at jonsi.com/go. Folks, last month I mentioned that Soulkiss' Tim Dillinger has a very much worth reading blog. May I please re-direct you to that blog again, especially Dillinger's recent post "Who Is The Real Jesus?"

http://timdillinger.blogspot.com/2010/04/who-is-real-jesus.html. It's his tale of his relationship with Jesus and christianity, setting down at a number of points along the way to his public coming out in 2007. HIs personal testimony is moving and insightful, and I believe it has value whether you're gay or christian or not. Meanwhile, the title track can be heard at myspace.com/ soulkissdas/playlists — I DARE you to sit without feeling moved by it to bounce up and down and shake what you got — and an in-concert performance video (with mediocre sound but great spirit) is up at grownfolksmusic.com/blog/?p=6410. I promise a full review of Good Intentions (the album) next issue, OK? You should know:

Melissa Etheridge ~ Fearless Love is in stores

April 27. Other than the fine title track I haven't heard it all yet, but I expect/hope it stands up to the promise of the returning champion-like promotional push that's behind it. One of my favorite Lesbian musicians continues to defy the odds. She's a true classic. Dancing To Architecture® contents © 2010 Bill Stella.™, ® & © items included in the column for review purposes are ™, ® & © their respective owners.


Page 10 CHALLENGE May 2010

GAY ACTIVIST ALLIANCE IN MORRIS COUNTY

Officers President....................................................Andy Skurna....................................... President AT GAAMC.org VP Community Services.................................... Sherri Rase..............................................Info AT GAAMC.org VP Operations............................................... John Livoti Secretary .................................................. Gordon Sauer ...................................... Secretary AT GAAMC.org Treasurer (acting)......................................... Andy Skurna....................................... Treasurer AT GAAMC.org Trustees Paul Greenberg, Marty Grifone, Mitch Rubin, Mickey Suiter Trustees Emeriti Sue Harris, Robin Schneider, Mark Wydner Committee Chairs Activism.............................................................. open........................................ Activism AT GAAMC.org Archives....................................................Mickey Suiter ........................................ Archives AT GAAMC.org Discussion Group Resources............................ Gordon Sauer .....................................Discussions AT GAAMC.org Facebook....................................................Andy Skurna Fundraising............................................. Paul Greenberg.................................... Fundraising AT GAAMC.org Information..................................................Mitch Rubin.................................... FreeLibrary AT GAAMC.org Member Services/Front Desk............ John Livoti, Allen Neuner Membership......................................................... open...................................Memberships AT GAAMC.org Pride Guide................................................... Sue Harris..................................... PrideGuide AT GAAMC.org Programs..................................................... Sherri Rase....................................... Programs AT GAAMC.org Public Relations............................................. Sherri Rase..............................................Info AT GAAMC.org Socials................................................... Charlie Murphy.......................................... Socials AT GAAMC.org Speakers Bureau........................................... Chris Selitto............................... SpeakersBureau AT GAAMC.org Volunteerism.................................................Sherri Rase...................................... Volunteer AT GAAMC.org Webmaster ................................................. Andy Skurna..................................... Webmaster AT GAAMC.org Yahoo! Group................................................. Sue Harris YuDu....................................................... Suzanne Kaye............................................ YuDu AT GAAMC.org Intern Ali Melillo GAAMC, the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, has served New Jersey’s gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, and intersexed community since 1972. GAAMC is a not-for-profit volunteer-run organization that provides social, educational, and outreach programs. GAAMC also offers opportunities for individuals to become politically active on issues related to the GLBTI community. Our intent is to maintain a positive, healthy, respectful, and supportive environment in a safe space. Meetings are held every Monday evening at the Morristown Unitarian Fellowship, 21 Normandy Heights Rd., Morristown, NJ (near the Morris Museum). Discussion groups meet from 7:00 to 8:00. The evening's program starts at 8:00 pm. Refreshments are available. For program information, call our information line or check our homepage (see below). Members and non-members are always welcome. Annual membership dues are: Regular, $40/single, $70/couple; Students/Seniors, $30/single, $60/couple. Those looking to help out at GAAMC can contact the Volunteer Coordinator, Sherri Rase, at Volunteer AT GAAMC.org. How to reach GAAMC Mail: PO Box 137, Convent Station, NJ 07961 Telephone: 973-285-1595 E-Mail: info AT gaamc.org Home page: http://www.gaamc.org Mail List: http://groups.yahoo.com/subscribe/gaamc

Challenge, May 2010  

The monthly newsletter of GAAMC.org, the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County NJ. Proudly serving the GLBTI communities since 1972

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