THE WAY I SEE IT ...
PUBLISHER’S LETTER
Robin Rogers, Ed.D.
like so many others, get sentimental this time of year. The holidays remind me most of my family, the people I’ve lost, and the people who I have gratefully gained. It’s the time of year when my mother makes candy—Martha Washington chocolates, haystacks, and peppermint bark—which she doesn’t do at any other time of the year. She scents her house with real cinnamon sticks on her stovetop, and she has a special gift, wrapped for everybody she loves, even if it is something simple. Watching her (always, but especially during the holidays) reminds me of the kind of person I aspire to be—caring, grateful, and focused on what actually matters. At Christmas, I am ever so grateful for the positive female role models in my life, who have made family their top priority.
In a storybook version of Christmas, family members from near and far gather around a perfectly dressed dinner table for a holiday meal. Historically, that has not been my own family’s tradition. When my kids were young, we were more into Christmas brunch, complete with mimosas and breakfast casserole. But last year, someone in my life—to whom I am not biologically or legally related but who is definitely my family—suggested that I host Christmas dinner. I agreed, although the idea was daunting. I am not a homemaker or “hostess with the mostest.” I do not cook. I do not like to clean. And yet, if I am having people over to my house, I hold myself to Martha Stewart standards. We have to use the nice china, real silverware, placemats, Christmas napkins—the whole song and dance. I deepcleaned my house, ordered Julie’s (because, no matter how much of a perfectionist I am, I will never cook a full holiday meal), rented extra chairs from Dot’s, and sent out the text-message invites.
unconventional family laughed and told stories and ate and drank. Everyone left saying, “We must do this every year!” A new tradition was established.
Looking back at photos of past Christmases, I am struck by the fact that life passes so quickly, even when I don’t feel like that much is actually changing. I don’t feel older, and my tree and decor look about the same as they always have. But there are subtle things that make me remember that I am in a new chapter. It seems like it was just a few years ago when I had to threaten my kids to get them all to smile for a group photo. Nowadays, they are all grown adults and willingly pose with their siblings. Santa no longer comes to my house, but I am eager to help him with his list for my grandchildren—and to take those babies to as many fun holiday events as their parents will let me. I am counting down the days to the Main Street Christmas Parade; I can hardly wait to see the festivities through their little eyes.
This year, our December issue happens to be filled with many stories about children, which makes perfect sense: Christmastime is the most special for the youngest among us. Yes, the presents are exciting for the kids, but more than that, I believe that our kids most desire love, attention, and tradition. The toothbrushes in the stockings. The roasted pecans that Mom makes best (literally the only thing I ever “cook”). The collective afternoon nap in the living room, with the smell of the real tree and (weather permitting) a fire crackling in the fireplace. Family is everything. Time with family is everything. I know Klancy and Scotty Barlow, who share our cover this month, feel the same way and are savoring every moment of their daughter’s first Christmas. Olivia and Caleb Coleman are also relishing this season, with their twin daughters finally home after more than two months in the NICU. The Balmain home is sure to be full of excitement this month, with three young boys sharing in the merriment. And the tight-knit Horton family of four is surely counting their blessings and multiplying them with generosity.
As I start to wrap my head around hosting Christmas dinner again this year, I am getting clear on my priorities. While I will certainly still stress out over placemats and pet hair and oven space for all of the delicious purchased casseroles, my goal this year is to worry less about the stuff and instead focus more on my people. Time moves so fast and is so precious; I don’t want to miss any of it.
What transpired was absolutely perfect. Our weird, wonderful,
PUBLISHER
Dr. Robin Rogers
EDITOR
Ellen Orr
GRAPHIC DESIGN & PHOTOGRAPHY
Shane Darby
SALES REPRESENTATIVE
Victoria Herman
EDITORIAL ASSISTANT
Phoebe Warren
I hope you enjoy all we share and spend as much time as possible with your loved ones this Christmas. Happy holidays, my friends, and as always, thanks for reading FSLM. See you in 2026!
CONTRIBUTING
PHOTOGRAPHERS
Debbie Brower
Victoria Herman
Cydni Lauren
Tania Olah
CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
Emily Gammon
Abigail Gold
Madeline Haak
Ellen Orr
Robin Proctor
Sarah Vammen
Greer Veon
Phoebe Warren
Four States Living Magazine is published the first business day of every month. © Copyright 2025 by Four States Living Magazine. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form without written permission of the publisher. Four States Living Magazine is distributed free of charge. Direct mail subscriptions are $40.00 per year. Reader correspondence and editorial submissions are welcome. We reserve the right to edit or reject any material contributed.
Do You Have a Story or a Photo?
We welcome information regarding topics of interest for future publications. If you have a story or photos that in some way depicts living or visiting in the Four States area and would be of interest to our readers, we want to hear from you. Call 903-792-2262 or write: Editorial Department, Four States Living Magazine, 4104 Summerhill Square, Texarkana, Texas 75503. Comments are also welcome at our e-mail address: info@fourstatesliving.com
Want to Advertise?
Advertising rates may be obtained by contacting the Sales Department at 903-792-2262, writing to Four States Living Magazine, 4104 Summerhill Square, Texarkana, Texas 75503, visiting our website www.fourstatesliving.com or emailing our Sales Department at info@fourstatesliving.com
ON THE COVER DECEMBER 2025
For Klancy Johnson-Barlow and her husband, MLB pitcher Scotty Barlow, this holiday season is the best one yet. As they unwind from the busy lifestyle of a baseball couple, they look forward to celebrating their daughter’s first Christmas.
Read Season of Joy on page 36.
The Horton family embodies generosity yearround. Following the lead of their parents, Amanda and Jason, children Charlie Jack and Avalene understand that joyful hearts are hearts that give.
Read about the Hortons’ giving spirit on page 12.
ABOUT TOWN
THE ANNUAL CANDY CANE CORRAL WAS HELD AT THE FOUR STATES FAIR PERFORMANCE & EVENT VENUE ON SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 1ST.
Aurora Covington and Shannon Adamson
CeAira Burns and Ty’Stacia Dean
Lexie Birmingham and Brianna Freeman
Brandi Coleman and Breezy Baxter
Sheila Kegley
Tiffani Jordan, Steve Mitchell (Santa Steve), and Maggie Smith
Marion Duffourd and Martina Tursi Maya Jackson and Pamela Lee
Shanda Jones, Lily Jones, and Ella Grace Birmingham Ashlynn Kegley Cortnie and Skylar Parks
Debbie Burns, Lisa Garner, Terri Smith, Blake Sisk, Kristen Larey, Jessie Thomas, and Kevin McGee
Abby Delaney and Chelsea Dougan
Charity Williams and Josh Halcomb
Mark and Debbie Hannibal with Anita Dodez
Tiffany Earnest, Ramzi Robles, and Katie Robles
Tim Palmer and Tammie Summers
Tina Mckean and Christy Mills
MyKayla Jones and Kristin McLean
Teresa and Jeff Misenheimer
The members of the Horton family talk donation drives, caregiving, and raising compassionate children
DRIVEN TOGIVE
by ELLEN ORR
Last school year, 12-year-old Charlie Jack Horton noticed something troubling among his classmates at Texas Middle School. “I would see a bunch of kids that didn’t have backpacks, and so they would carry all their stuff—their folders, binders, Chromebooks,” he said. “They would carry them around to every class, and stuff would get lost. I thought that, if they had a backpack, then it would lower the chance of stuff getting lost and help with moving from class to class.”
Last summer, with the help of his mother, Amanda, Charlie Jack recorded a video. “Each year, my fellow classmates start school in need of a backpack. Chromebooks, binders, and supplies are very heavy,” he emphasized in the video. “I’m putting together a backpack drive to help those in need.” Once the video was shared on social media, donations began pouring in. Charlie Jack collected around 40 backpacks, which were then distributed by TISD staff before the start of the 2025–2026 school year.
Taking care of the people around him comes naturally to the seventh grader, who has grown up learning firsthand from his mother.
“[Our kids’] strength comes from Mama,” Jason Horton said. “She has a mentality of, ‘Let’s get to work.’ She goes above and beyond to do what she has to do to help somebody.”
Amanda Raney Horton came to understand caretaking earlier than most. At age four, her teenage brother suffered an accident that resulted in paralysis. “Their mother, Patsy [Raney], was an amazing, amazing woman,” Jason said. “She jumped right in [as a caretaker]. I’m from a different way of life, but [the Raneys] are ‘get your hands dirty, fix the problem, and let’s make it right.’ I think Amanda has had that mentality her whole life.”
“You can’t wallow, and you can’t get stuck in self-pity,” Amanda said. “If you can’t find any joy—it’s there, so you’ve got to look for it, or you’ve got to create it. And I think a lot of that is [found] in doing things for others.”
<< << Earlier this year, Avalene raised money for her school, Morriss Elementary, by baking pecan pies in exchange for donations—as her brother did in 2019.
With friend Isaac Steel, Charlie Jack collected canned foods for a BSA food drive. submitted photos
photo by SHANE DARBY
Patsy was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in the early 2010s. As the disease progressed, the family painstakingly decided that it was time for Patsy to move into a memory care facility. Although Amanada would have never imagined herself in this position, she drove Patsy to the facility and walked her inside. When Amanda told Patsy what they were there for, in typical Patsy style, she said, “That sounds like something I need,” and walked right in.
Given the circumstances, Amanda worried that Charlie Jack and his younger sister, Avalene (now 9), would not get to develop relationships with their grandmother. Fortunately, that fear was unfounded. Throughout the disease’s cruel progression, Charlie Jack and Avalene built strong bonds with their beloved “Gabby.”
“One of the last times Avalene saw Patsy, we got a picture of her sitting on Patsy’s lap,” Jason said. “Nursing homes can sometimes feel awkward, but Avalene didn’t want to leave.” Jason explained that, while many younger people perceive older, sicker people as “frail” or hard to connect with, Avalene recognized from a young age her grandmother’s humanity. “She knew she was a person, and she loved her,” Jason said. “Both of our kids, with Amanda being as brave as she is—they’ve just clicked with that a lot earlier in life than others [do].”
Patsy died in 2024. This fall, Avalene honored her Gabby in the best way she knew how—by helping others.
“My grandma would always want to hold my baby dolls whenever I brought them, whenever I got to see her,” Avalene said. “Charlie did a
In 2020, the Horton family fundraised for, purchased, and delivered 3,700 water bottles for TISD elementary students. Due to COVID-19 precautions, water fountains were unavailable to students. <<
Charlie Jack and Avalene have treasured bonds with their Gabby, the late Patsy Raney, and Gumpy, Charles Raney.
Far left: Avalene distributed baby dolls to residents at multiple memory care facilities, including McKee Assisted Living and Memory Care.
submitted photos
backpack drive, so I thought it would be good to have a baby doll drive. There’s a lot of people that have Alzheimer’s, and I wanted to make them happy.”
Following in her brother’s video-making footsteps, Avalene shared her call across Facebook. More than 60 dolls were donated, and Avalene personally distributed them to patients at multiple local memory care facilities. “I got to see their joy and happiness,” she said. “It was really fun to see them having fun with the baby dolls, rocking them and taking care of them.”
The Hortons are quick to mention the care that they have received from others—family, friends, and community members— in times of need, especially during Amanda’s recent experience with breast cancer. Charlie Jack expressed gratitude for the care packages he received from his parents’ friends, as well as those from his classmates at TMS. Unlike many families, the Hortons chose to include their children in much of their mother’s treatment and recovery process.
“[Seeing my mom experience cancer] showed me how much of a fighter my mom is, and how she can go through anything and everything, and she’ll still love us the same and be here for us,” Charlie Jack said of the experience. “And I think it has made me a better person. I know what it looks like [to go through cancer], and if someone else is going through that, I can help them.”
Avalene and Charlie Jack joined Amanda on her first walk after undergoing a bilateral mastectomy in 2023.
submitted photo
“It worries me some that they both have such caring, giving, loving hearts,” Amanda said. “They’re old souls. It worries me that they’ve maybe been exposed to too much—but, you know, it’s life. As long as you talk it out, deal with it, and don’t suppress it, I think it will be alright in the end.”
“If something bad happens, instead of stepping back and saying, ‘Oh man, that’s bad,’ our kids will be like, ‘Let me fix it,’” Jason said, adding that he himself did not develop that instinct until much later in life. “They already know that, if somebody needs help, you just help them.”
Growing up around disability, dementia, cancer, and—most importantly—unrelenting love has undoubtedly shaped the Horton children. These experiences “made you more empathetic, though
you’ve always kind of been that way,” Amanda said to her kids. “You understand that people”—those without backpacks, with dementia, using wheelchairs, in chemotherapy—“are just people.”
While Jason and Amanda want Charlie Jack and Avalene to understand and appreciate the tangible benefits of hard work, they understand that being exposed to those benefits can be a very slippery slope. “Somebody once told me [when referring to a family’s lifestyle], ‘Be careful, because the parent’s maximum is the child’s minimum,’” Jason shared. “So we’re cognizant—especially Amanda—to teach them that, if you are able to give, then give.”
Amanda and Jason hope that practicing gratitude, having empathy, and maintaining a giving spirit will set Avalene and Charlie Jack up for more fulfilling, compassionate, and joyful lives.
SCENE ABOUT TOWN
TEXAR HELD ITS ANNUAL BANDS, BREWS, & BITES EVENT AT THE PEROT THEATRE ON SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 1ST.
Katherine and Emmanuel Otero
The Moss Brothers Band: Cody Moss, Preston Moss, Greg Lynch, and Mark Braley
Gerald and Sarah Williams with daughter Marlowe, Kelly Mitchell, Macey Terry, and Jessika Campos
Tim and Liz Eason
Hunter Ferrell and Morgan Bryant Chris and Gina Foster Summer Nelson and Lorie Owen Phoebe Warren and Ted Stone
Terry and Sabrina Whiteside
Justin and Denise Cruise
THREE BOYS, UNLIMITED BLESSINGS
Heather and Adam Balmain reflect on their foster care and adoption journey
by SARAH VAMMEN
Family movie nights, loud gatherings, and little feet pattering down the hall were always part of Heather and Adam Balmain’s shared vision of family. They are now able to live out these dreams with their three sons, whom they adopted through the foster care system.
Heather, a medical coder for UAMS Little Rock, and Adam, a lineman for Bowie-Cass Electric Cooperative and youth pastor at Myrtle Springs Baptist Church, married in 2009 and live in De Kalb, Texas. “We knew pretty much from the beginning of our marriage that we wanted children,” Heather said. While the idea of adoption came up occasionally, Heather and Adam didn’t seriously consider it until they had been married about eight years and had not yet had children. “We did always have a heart for adoption, and as time went on, God continued to grow our heart for it and reveal that plan to us,” she said.
The Balmains contacted agency A World For Children in Tyler, Texas, to become licensed for foster care and adoption. Though adopting a child was the Balmains’ initial intent, their goals evolved as they learned more about the system. “Reunification with the biological family is almost always the main goal,” Heather said. “Our first placement was the perfect picture of what foster care is supposed to be. We got to really come alongside her biological parent and help work toward reunification. It opened our hearts to a whole world and plan bigger than we could have ever imagined.”
Heather and Adam know that this was a journey they were meant to take. They’ve even become advocates for other families who are considering this path. “All it takes is a ‘yes’ to get started,” Heather said. She encourages anyone who is curious about beginning their own foster care and/or adoption journey to reach out to a local agency who can help interested families become licensed for foster care placements, navigate each family’s situation, and guide them through the legal process for adoption.
We knew our calling and continued to say ‘yes’ to the children God put in our path. “ ”
Each of the Balmains’ sons started out as foster care placements, and each adoption process was unique. “Our first [adoption process] was an absolute rollercoaster ride full of ups and downs,” Heather said. “There were a couple of times that we got close to everything crashing down. It tested us in so many ways but also strengthened our faith.” Finally, when he was 20 months old, Adam and Heather were able to finalize their oldest son’s adoption.
The family of three continued to accept foster care placements. “We knew our calling and continued to say ‘yes’ to the children God put in our path,” Heather said. They went on to adopt two more beloved boys. Heather emphasized that three foster-to-adopt cases in one family is unusual and that the primary goal of foster care is almost always to reunite children with their birth families.
The journey of building their family has bonded and changed Heather and Adam in ways they never expected. “I think it’s impossible to love and care for these little boys with all your heart and not be changed in the process,” Heather said. “It comes with sacrifices that have molded us and strengthened us for the better in all aspects.”
The boys bring joy to everything we do that we were missing before. “ ”
Now, as a family of five, the holiday season feels even more magical for the Balmains. “The boys bring joy to everything we do that we were missing before,” Heather said. “Our favorite family activity at the moment is family movie nights complete with pizza and snacks while we watch Polar Express in our Christmas pajamas.”
The joy of opening their hearts and homes to their sons has also come with difficulties. “We have lots of everyday challenges that come with parenting three young kiddos, especially kids that may not have had the easiest backgrounds,” Heather said. Learning to adapt has become a superpower for the Balmains. “Those challenges bring joy as well—joy in the little accomplishments, and joy in the fact that, at the end of the day, we are a family that is full of love and too many blessings to count.” Heather looks forward to slowing down and watching her boys bond as brothers, grow, and make family memories.
SCENE ABOUT TOWN
TEXARKANA EMERGENCY CENTER & HOSPITAL HELD A RIBBON-CUTTING CELEBRATING THEIR 10TH ANNIVERSARY AT THEIR FACILITY ON WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 19TH.
Kami Clayton, Rhonda Ivy, Molly Young, Kristen Sojo, Tina Starkey, and Ashley Bostick
Brooke Marshall and Amy Tankersley
Berkley McKnight, Chloe Wardlaw, and Brittney Haynes
Dr. Kyle Groom and Dr. Bo Kelley
Dr. Doug Brubaker and Todd Marshall
Will Humphrey and James Bramlett
Kali Bannon, Angela Herrington, and Carol Waldrum Kristi Brown and Corie Woodman
Tiffannee Watson, Billie Pritchett, and Krystal Webb
Rachael Potter and Lindsey Clark Morgan Smith and Tony Langford
Chris Black and Chuck Weerts
Billy Lavender, Brad Bailey, and Jeff Wright
STRONG OOTS
THE PERFECTLY IMPERFECT
Christmas
by ROBIN PROCTOR
When I was a child, Christmas didn’t generally begin with a catalog or a box store—although it was a happy day when my mother would pick up the copy of the Sears catalogue filled with photos of smiling children, polyester, and toys. The true beginning of Christmas for my family began in the woods. Each December, my family would pull on our boots and tramp through the trees, looking for that one “perfect” pine to bring home. Our mother had been eyeing all the trees from the road throughout the year; I can clearly hear her saying, “That would make a good Christmas tree,” even if it were July. And it never phased her if the one she selected was actually the top of a 20-foot tree; Dad would always accommodate her wishes.
“Perfect,” of course, was a matter of opinion: most of our trees leaned a little, had bare spots, and housed the occasional bird’s nest—but that never bothered my dad. He’d bring it home, set it in the old tree stand, and toenail in a few extra limbs wherever the gaps were. By the time my mother had finished stringing the lights and we’d hung our mismatched ornaments and tossed mounds of silver icicles, it was the most beautiful tree in the world. We didn’t have much money for fancy decorations, but I never felt deprived. The masterfully placed lights shimmered softly against the star at the top, and the smell of pine filled the living room. There was always a fire in the fireplace, something baking in the oven, laughter, and dad on the piano with his girls singing carols.
submitted photos
Robin as a little girl (front) celebrating Christmas with her mother Norma Choate (top left) and sisters Judy Choate-Jones, Sandy Chaote-Dunham, and Peggy Choate-Roberts.
Even now, all these years later, that memory is held in my heart, never to be forgotten.
Somewhere along the way, Christmas became louder, shinier, and a lot more complicated. These days, Christmas seems to arrive in store aisles before the turkey has been carved, or even before the leftover Halloween candy has been eaten. The pressure to buy more, decorate bigger, host, and hurry can steal the joy before we’ve even untangled the lights. The stress of “the quest” to find the perfect toy or gift is often daunting.
As an aspiring homesteader, I am trying to hold onto what Christmas used to mean, intentionally slowing down the pace of the holiday. It’s so easy to get caught up in the rush, but, counterintuitively, I relax in the realization that there are still chores to be done—animals to feed, eggs to collect, pens to be cleaned and bread to bake. I find peace in the monotony of the work.
The season feels real again when I can step outside into the quiet of a frosty morning, breathe in the smell of pine and wood smoke, and have a mug of coffee by the fire. This is the perfect reset to focus on the true meaning of the Christmas season, a gentle reminder that Christmas isn’t found in what we can buy but in what we choose to give of ourselves. The greatest gifts don’t always come wrapped in shiny paper with a big price tag. Some of the best presents are baked, grown, stitched, canned, or even made of memories from the past.
When I think back, I can hardly remember what toys I unwrapped as a child. But, if I close my eyes, I can
A Simple Recipe for Sharing
Daily, I am inspired by the creativity and talent of those I have met and followed in the homesteading community. The inspiration and wealth of knowledge they provide for others is nothing short of genius, and I have gotten from them so many great gift ideas: herbed salts, vanilla sugar, homemade vanilla, freshly ground flour, even Irish cream. With the holiday season of giving quickly approaching, this is the perfect opportunity to create your own gifts from the heart for friends and family.
If you’re looking for a small, heartfelt gift this season, try this recipe for homemade vanilla extract. It’s simple, lasts for years, and carries the sweetest reminder that good things take time.
Ingredients:
3 vanilla beans (split lengthwise)
1 cup vodka or bourbon
1 glass jar with a tight lid
Directions:
Place the split vanilla beans into the jar.
Pour in the alcohol, making sure the beans are fully submerged.
Seal tightly, and store in a cool, dark place.
Shake every few days for the first couple of weeks.
After about two months, the liquid will darken and develop that rich, warm aroma of true vanilla. The longer it sits, the deeper the flavor becomes—just like good memories. Tie a ribbon around the jar, and add a handwritten tag, and you’ve got a gift that feels personal and genuine.
still hear the sewing machine purring behind the locked bedroom door. I would sit on the other side, anticipating the things my mother was skillfully making for me: a new dress, or Barbie clothes better than anything in the store. Those were the things that lasted—the small, thoughtful gestures that said, “I thought you would love this.” More recently, my sweet niece, with the help of my sister, surprised me with a framed picture of me as a young girl standing next to my great-grandmother. I was instantly brought to tears. Simple things that meant so much.
As Christmas approaches, I find myself reflecting on those early days with my family—the crooked trees, the homemade gifts, the laughter that filled every corner of our home. Life was simpler then, but not because it was easier. It was simpler because our joy wasn’t tangled up in expectation, even if we had dog-eared most of the pages in the Sears catalog. We celebrated what we had, and when Christmas morning finally arrived, our hearts and eyes were filled with delight.
My heart is full of gratitude that the generations before me taught me the importance of this season and shared their talents. I am grateful the homemade ornaments still hang on my tree each year and reflect the stories of the past. And maybe, if we’re lucky, we’ll always find beauty in those “perfectly imperfect” trees—and in each other.
Robin faithfully hangs old family ornaments on the tree each year.
SCENE ABOUT TOWN
LONESTAR AESTHETICS & WELLNESS HELD ITS 6TH ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION ON SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 2ND.
Robyn Eaves and Pamela Beck Rachel Hoover and Amanda Razaq Hadley Hickerson and Callie Breshears
Kelly Harvin and Alissa Flanagan
Linda Leach, Summer Gerrald, and Cheyenne Epstein
Marcie Matthews and Charity Noble Ross
Kaitlin McDowell and Staci Brown
Suki O’Neal, Jennifer Studdard, and Jennifer Willis
Back Row: Ashley Allday, Samantha Harris, Miranda Mikkelsen, and Becca Turner Front Row: Amanda Ross, Hadley Hickerson, Kaylie Stephens, and Katie Peek
Renae Bowman, Marcie Matthews, Cindy Jennings, Tammy Strickland, and Gina Foster
SEASON OF JOY
Texarkana native Klancy Johnson-Barlow and her husband, MLB pitcher Scotty Barlow, share news of their daughter, Bronwyn Lake
by PHOEBE WARREN
Local Klancy Johnson-Barlow met her husband, Scotty, while he was visiting family in Texarkana. When the two were introduced, they hit it off immediately. “Of course I noticed how tall and handsome he was,” Klancy said. “I was even more impressed by his wit, sense of humor, and plethora of knowledge.”
The instant spark was mutual. “Her beauty caught my eye firstoff,” Scotty said. “Then, as we got to talking, I fell in love with her personality and sense of humor.”
Though they began their relationship long-distance, the connection deepened quickly. “Scotty and I talked everyday, nonstop, and never ran out of things to talk about,” Klancy said. “We’re different people in so many ways, but those differences somehow fit together like puzzle pieces.” They dated for nearly two years before getting engaged in January 2017 and married that November, at Garrison Gardens in Texarkana.
Their first year of marriage was a whirlwind. Shortly after their honeymoon, baseball player Scotty signed his first major league contract with the Kansas City Royals. Originally from Quaker Hill, Connecticut, Scotty had begun playing baseball at age 10, and his dream of pitching in the major leagues never wavered. His MLB debut came on April 30th, 2018, against the Boston Red Sox at Fenway Park.
“It was a wet and muddy game, but [being able] to run out to the mound to the entire stadium rocking out to ‘Sweet Caroline’
was one of the most incredible moments of my life,” Scotty said. Klancy describes that day as being surreal: “I witnessed firsthand the literal blood, sweat, and tears that had led up to that moment,” she said. The couple established their “home base” in Kansas City.
The following fall, Scotty played in the Dominican Republic and then had the opportunity to represent the Royals at the Japan All-Star series. “We spent our first anniversary flying to Tokyo,” Klancy said. “We couldn’t have had a better—or busier—start to forever.”
While their early days of marriage were a bit out of the ordinary, Klancy and Scotty each gained invaluable experiences. The couple purchased a fifth-wheel camper and lived in it together for a couple of years, along with their dogs, Harry and Heidi. “We loved feeling like we were home, no matter where we parked,” Klancy said.
While she and Scotty joke that she was “baptized by fire into the baseball world,” she has now fully adapted to the lifestyle of being married to a pro player, learning the ins and outs of the game, traveling solo, and interacting with new people from all kinds of backgrounds. “I’ve learned to embrace the chaos and unpredictability,” she said. “I also lean on the other women who live this lifestyle. Baseball families become our own little village during the season. Even with its challenges, it’s absolutely worth it. I try to soak it all in—every city, every team, every ballpark.”
All of Klancy’s custom jackets, including this 2023 opening-day look, were created by Pleasant Grove Middle School art teacher Taylor Timmons.
Klancy announced her pregnancy on her jacket for the opening day of 2025.
Klancy is on the road constantly from February to October; she has been to 26 of the 30 stadiums Scotty has played at. Scotty travels on the team plane to and from the away games, and family members must organize and pay for their own travel. Though the constant travel is a grueling part of this gig, there are some nice perks. “Scotty has been on great teams that put a lot of work into making sure the families are taken care of—a great family liaison to work with us throughout the season, a family lounge, free childcare during home games, family trips, and premier parking,” Klancy said.
Scotty is currently a relief pitcher for the Cincinnati Reds. He signed with the Reds in February 2025.
While Scotty works hard on the field, Klancy takes her supporting role seriously. In 2020, the COVID-19 outbreak made family members unable to cheer on their beloved players in-person for that season. “I wanted something unique and totally custom to wear to celebrate being back in the stands to cheer Scotty on for the 2021 season,” she said. “That opening day I wore a personalized denim jacket with Scotty’s name and number on it, along with patches of our dogs, Harry and Heidi.” She decided to make it a yearly tradition, and since then, her opening day jackets continue to grow more intricate and showstopping. “All of my truly custom jackets have been created by my dear friend and phenomenal artist, Taylor Timmons,” she said. “She has created the most stunning jackets for me using so many different materials, creating a look with so many layers and textures.”
Klancy’s jackets have become something many look forward to, eager to find out what her opening-day look will be each year. “I think my elaborate outfits garnered a lot of attention because ‘opening-day ‘fits’ weren’t really a baseball thing a few years ago, at least that I ever saw,” she said. “It was kind of considered uncool to wear something so
Klancy and Scotty were married at Garrison Gardens wedding venue in November 2017.
photo by
photo by VISUALS BY TANIA
loud and colorful with the players name and number on it. But where’s the fun in that?”
Klancy and Scotty Barlow decided to add even more excitement to their busy lives and take on a different kind of challenge: parenthood. This past July, they welcomed their daughter into the world. “Bronwyn Lake Barlow is our heart and soul,” Klancy said. “Welcoming our child into the world put everything else in perspective.”
Having a baby while navigating the professional baseball world has had its ups and downs for the Barlows. Klancy gave birth to Bronwyn during the season, and Scotty was given 72 hours of paternity leave in Kansas City before rejoining his team in Cincinnati. “While baseball is absolutely worth the challenges, him leaving so soon after welcoming our daughter was a tough goodbye for us both,” Klancy said. However, Scotty has more motivation than ever to play his best, knowing that his daughter is now a part of his fan base. Bronwyn went to her first baseball game last summer, only a month old. “Scotty loved knowing she was there, and the photos we took of them on the field are heartmelting,” Klancy said. “When the Reds made it to the post-season, we flew to Los Angeles to cheer him on as he faced the Dodgers.”
Every day is meaningful to these new parents, and they take care to appreciate the precious moments together as a family. “Waking her up in the mornings is my favorite,” Scotty said. “She wakes up so happy and excited to see us. It’s the best start to my day ever.”
With the MLB season ending, the Barlows are getting ready to travel to Connecticut and Texarkana so they can make sure Bronwyn meets most of her family. “We’re really cherishing our family time at home, learning how to be the best parents for our daughter,” Klancy said. “We’re so excited for her first holiday season.”
The Barlows may not plan to slow down for long, but their future will be filled with memories made as a family that make the hustle and bustle worth it. “I can’t wait to watch our daughter grow up and experience the world through her eyes,” Scotty said.
For Klancy, taking on parenthood with Scotty is also something to look forward to. “We’ve learned to be flexible and take things as they come,” she said. “We’re working together as a team to build the life we’ve dreamed of.”
“ ”
We’re really cherishing our family time at home, learning how to be the best parents for our daughter. We’re so excited for her first holiday season.
photo by VISUALS BY TANIA
SCENE ABOUT TOWN
TRACY LAWRENCE PLAYED A HOMECOMING CONCERT DOWNTOWN AT FRONT STREET PLAZA ON SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 8TH.
Troy and Crissy Taylor Tammy Johnson and Gina Jones
Summer Tucker and Matthew Lawson
Keith Taylor, Paisly Carter, and Misty Taylor Lexi Smith and Palyn Swann
Journey Powell and Wrangler Fletcher
Matthew and Christa Guajardo
Bonnie Bernardi, Olivia Poulton, Salina Andersson, Buck Walton, Dan Nguyen, and E.J. Jamison
Ty and Shelby Cundieff with Virgie Blanton
Lawana Rhoades and Ethan Roper
Home for the
HOLIDAYS
Olivia and Caleb Coleman celebrate having both of their babies home for Christmas, after 80 days in the NICU
by MADELINE HAAK
For some, the biggest holiday conundrum is deciding on the appropriate time to put up the tree and bring out the Christmas decorations. Olivia and Caleb Coleman, Texarkana natives and new parents to twin girls, have been facing much bigger challenges as the holiday season approaches.
When a pregnant Olivia’s water broke at 27 weeks, she was taken to Little Rock, admitted to the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences (UAMS), and prescribed six weeks of inpatient bedrest. At 33 weeks, On August 31st, 2025, she gave birth to her premature girls. Margot arrived at four pounds and six ounces, while Winley May weighed just three pounds and eleven ounces.
“Margot came out loud and proud with her hand raised in the air; we say she was praising the Lord,” Olivia said. “A wave of relief came over me hearing her cry, then I held my breath again to hear Winley. Winley came out two minutes later with her little cry. Caleb and I both were so relieved. We knew we still had a long road ahead, but we were grateful they were here safe.”
submitted photo
Above: Margot and Winley were allowed bonding time during their long NICU stays.
photo
Margot spent two months and six days at UAMS. Winley spent 80 days in the NICU before finally being brought home on November 19th. With both babies finally home, Olivia and Caleb are trying to get in the spirit of the season.
“I found myself longing last Christmas for children, and, this year, that prayer has been answered,” Olivia said. “Being with my family for Christmas and getting to be here as the girls’ mother—I could not ask for more. This is the Christmas we felt complete. A new sense of joy has come this year because of them—another thing to celebrate and a dream come true.”
The family is establishing a tradition of buying each daughter a nutcracker every year.
“Caleb buys me a Santa every year for Christmas, and we wanted to do something similar for the girls,” Olivia said. “Also, Caleb and his family have had the ‘real Santa’ over every year the day before Christmas Eve ever since he was a baby, and I’m so excited for us to have a photo with Santa and the girls, to carry that tradition on with our kids.”
Christmas traditions are not the only thing that Olivia wants her children to cling to as they grow up.
“I want them to know they will always have more strength than they think they do,” she said. “When your mind tells you that you can’t do it, you don’t always have a choice, and you will find a way.
Caleb and Olivia were married in October 2022.
Olivia and Caleb vacationed at Miramar Beach in 2023.
photo by CYDNI LAUREN PHOTOGRAPHY
submitted
photo
If they can beat the odds of their beginning, they can face any other giant in this world, and they will have us backing them.”
Caleb and Olivia’s marriage has only grown during this period of navigating newness and struggle.
“Becoming parents has made our relationship with each other even stronger,” Olivia said. “Seeing the way Caleb took care of me through all of this and staying by my side in some of the darkest and hardest times of my life made me love him even more. I am so happy my girls will have a perfect example of the type of man they should marry one day.”
Olivia has also learned invaluable lessons about herself and grown in her faith during this period of trials.
“Someone asked me once, ‘Why do you think this happened to you?’ and I say it’s because I will not be quiet about how good God is,” she said.
Olivia believes that her faith and trust in God’s plan is what carried her through the most difficult times she and Caleb faced while seeing their girls struggle.
“If I did tattoos, I would get it tattooed on me: ‘Your 41 is coming,’” she said. She was referring to the multiple instances in the Bible of 40 days or years of struggle followed
Olivia held Margot’s hand at UAMS, just thirty minutes after the twins’ birth.
Far left: In Olivia’s arms for the first time, Margot weighed just four pounds, six ounces.
At birth, Winley (pictured here with her father, Caleb) weighed less than four pounds.
For the moms waiting and worrying with their babies in the NICU: you are unleashing a strength you didn’t know you had. “ ”
by relief on the 41st day or year: “David defeated Goliath on day 41. Jesus fasted for 40 days and [was] tempted by the devil, but on day 41, the devil fled. I clung to this and said, ‘Our 41 is coming.’ Margot came home when she was 41 weeks gestational, and that’s not a coincidence.”
The community surrounding the Colemans has also been pivotal in supporting them.
“I cannot even put into words how thankful I am and awestruck by the ways my friends, family, and community helped us in this journey,” Olivia said. “I truly have the most amazing people in my life.”
If she could give any advice to other moms who find themselves in a situation similar to hers, Olivia would encourage them to give themselves grace along the journey and remember that they are setting an example for their children to admire.
“For the moms waiting and worrying with their babies in the NICU: you are unleashing a strength you didn’t know you had,” she said. “It seems like the NICU never ends, and it truly is like a roller coaster, but you will get to be the one rolling your baby out in a stroller going home one day. When your baby sees you, they see strength, comfort, their home, love, their best friend, and a woman who never gives up. It will seem like the longest time of your life, but your 41 is coming, too.”
photo by SHANE DARBY
OPPORTUNITIES, INC. HELD ITS ANNUAL AUTUMN LUNCHEON AT THE HOME OF JEANNA ROGERS ON THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 13TH.
Corie Woodman, Jeanna Rogers, and Brad Bailey Vee Collins and Mary Washington Karen Schmidt and Katheryn Schmidt
Jessica Smallwood, Dr. Loren Robinson, and Jessica Dupree Char Crane and Stephanie James
Melanie Cockerell and Jamye DeHaan Summer Floyd and Lisa Sitterley Jordan James and Gayle Wright
Tiffany Horton and Tina Griffin
Julia Carpenter and Dr. Mary Ellen Young Dianne Clem and Bertha Shipp
Melissa Harris, Mindy Williams, and Kim Rodgers
Dr. Molly Beth Malcolm, Rendi Wiggins, Cathy Lee, Erica Cain, and Susan Cogell
Morgan Gaddis and Morgan Bennett
Rhonda Allen, Suzy Irwin, and Nan Fry Suzy Irwin, Jeanna Rogers, and Yulin Brewer
Becky Bunch and Sylvia Ingram
Judge Sherry Hawkins, Camille McGinnis, and Becky Phillips Kathy Lanier, Ruth Penney-Bell, and Terri Peavy
EXQUISITE INTERIORS
MERRY AND BRIGHT
While most people are still packing away their pumpkins, Autumn Dawson gets to work early every year, transforming her home into a Christmas wonderland. Built in 2021 by Charlie McDowell, this five-bedroom, four-bath contemporary home is the perfect sleek backdrop for a sprinkle of traditional holiday charm. Autumn enjoys finding chic Christmas decor that still maintains an air of Christmases past. “I find the things I love and elevate them,” she said.
story by PHOEBE WARREN photography by SHANE DARBY
From the moment you approach the home, it looks a lot like Christmas, with string lights outlining the roof and garden beds. The windows and front door are adorned with wreaths and red velvet bows, beckoning visitors to come in from the cold and celebrate.
Crossing the threshold over a red plaid mat, visitors find that every inch of the home sparkles with festive spirit. Vibrant green garland is tied over the stair rail to the right, accented with more red velvet bows. A frosted pine tree stands regally in the entryway, decorated in red and gold. Classic red-and-white velvet stockings are hung neatly behind it, while garland peeks out from above the doorway ahead.
The living room introduces even more Christmastime charm. Red-and-white pillows and blankets accent the couch and chair, and lighted garland rests above the mantle. This gathering space hosts a towering Christmas tree decked out in red, white, gold, and gingham, and topped with a large, gleaming star.
To the right of the living space is the home’s kitchen. With white marble, cabinets, and tile, this room evokes a snowy Christmas backdrop for the wreaths and garland all placed with care. It also holds the most precious Christmas decoration in the Dawson home: a wooden Nativity scene centered atop the white kitchen island. The Nativity has been intentionally placed in the kitchen, the “heart of the home,” as a daily reminder of the reason the Dawsons celebrate. The couple wanted to ensure that the birth of Jesus was a focal point of their holiday decor, reflecting their Christian faith.
Past the kitchen is another snow-white backdrop—the dining room. A charming centerpiece of various Christmas tree statues is displayed on the dining table. In a corner of this room is another Christmas tree, this one decorated with whimsical gingerbread men and houses, and topped with nostalgic golden bells. The association of bells with Christmas dates back centuries; bell ringing was, and still is, used to symbolize the announcement of Jesus’ birth and the arrival of the Christmas season.
Two areas of the home sneak in a touch of modern-day holiday styling. In the guest bathroom, there is a splash of pink and green pastel color in the towels, Christmas tree figurines, and glittery Nutcracker. In the office, a shelf is decorated with a draping strand of baby pink, sage green, and champagne ornaments. A pink ceramic tree statue and hot pink velvet presents complete the scene.
Autumn and Joe Joe Dawson’s home glows with timeless holiday charm, blending traditional Christmas decor with contemporary structure. This blend of old and new creates a truly magical atmosphere, one that is undeniably merry and bright.
SCENE ABOUT TOWN
BAILEY CREEK HEALTH & REHAB HELD ITS GROUNDBREAKING CEREMONY AT 5111 JEFFERSON AVENUE ON WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 5TH.
Jaimie Alexander, Rep. Carol Dalby, and the Mayor Allen Brown
Emma Burton, Sarah Gaither, Kim Johnston, and Steve and Tammy McGuire Bailey Creek Staff
Jeresha Smith and Chasmine Tatum Jakob Martin and Davis McDaniel Marquincilla Glover and Tabitha Cole Steve Matlock and Melvin Fagan
Hillary Cloud and Berkley McKnight Lakeyia Black and Dr. Clay Ferguson
Fabienne Thrash and Janelle Williamson Hannia Martinez, Britain Koller, and George Dodson
by ABIGAIL GOLD
MEET M MADDAX MOORE
ost schools offer baseball, but few schools are as successful with it as Liberty-Eylau High School. In 2024, the team won the state championship. Senior Maddax Moore is an excellent team member as well as an excellent student.
“He was an integral part of winning the state championship,” said Ashley McCarter, a counselor at Liberty-Eylau. He and the team spent many days after school practicing until late in the evening, preparing for each of their games.
“[We] spend all year grinding ... to chase a state championship,” Maddax explained. Their hard work definitely paid off. “It was unreal,” Maddax said of winning the championship. “The amount of happiness I experienced that day is something I will never forget.”
Maddax said that juggling school and baseball can be challenging, but he has a good handle on it. “You miss more school during baseball season, which means more homework, but in the end, it’s worth it,” he said. Even with the extra strain of baseball, he has managed to earn the second-highest GPA in his class. “I didn’t focus on [class rank] as much at first, but now I wanna be first,” he said.
Maddax began his athletic career as a T-ball player at Spring Lake Park.
photo by
Baseball has been a big contributor to Maddax’s work ethic and philosophy on goal-setting. “Failure is a part of life, and it gives you a chance to learn from your mistakes and do better the next time you face a certain challenge,” he said. It’s that thought process that has gotten him so far in all he aims to achieve. Learning from failure, rather than cowering away from it, drastically improves a person’s drive, so it’s not surprising that Maddax has achieved so much. He’s always working to improve.
The atmosphere at Liberty-Eylau has most definitely contributed to learning such important lessons. “LE is a place where the whole community is together because everybody knows each other and we can get along easily,” Maddax said. Having a good school environment can make all the difference, and it’s great that Maddax has found a place where he can thrive. “I am very pleased with my decision to come to LE, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world,” he said.
Maddax doesn’t just show up; he actively learns from everything he does. He’s extremely motivated, and his teammates and classmates are lucky to have him. Maddax Moore is an incredible student, with an ability to learn from all that he does. As he enters the second semester of his final year of high school, there’s no doubt that he will continue to achieve great things in both baseball and the classroom.
Abigail Gold is a senior at Texas High School. She is a member of the Tiger Theatre Company with a deep love of art in all its forms. Whether performing, writing, or painting, she’s always looking for a creative outlet.
Maddax is a pitcher for the Liberty-Eylau Leopards.
Maddax was selected as pitcher for the 3A Division 1 Baseball All-Tournament Team for the 2024–2025 school year.
A SKY FULL OF DREAMS
John Veon turned his lifelong hunting hobby into a career in ecology research
by GREER VEON
For my little brother, John Veon, the duck blind is where great ideas are born, where someone can witness overhead a sky full of dreams. He spent his childhood trapping insects in our backyard and rolling his red wagon to the neighborhood pond to fish. Since he was young, John has had a natural tendency to obsess over different organisms and their environment.
John is now a PhD candidate at the University of California–Davis doing, more or less, what he has done his entire life: studying ecology. His research focuses on waterfowl and wetlands, which is fitting, because anyone who knows John would tell you that the first thing they associate with him are ducks. Growing up in Texarkana, he was one of the many kids around town who spent their holiday breaks in the duck woods of Mercer Bayou, around Millwood Lake, or in a blind at Anderson Wright’s family farm. Now, his apartment in California is decorated with vintage wooden decoys, including a 1950s Victor Majestic Mallard, which was found in the Cache River bottoms. One might assume that John has pursued this career all his life— and in some ways, he has. But, like the ups and downs of a duck population, John’s career path has not been so linear.
John’s story starts like that of many kids who grow up around outdoors enthusiasts. Our father, Robert Veon, taught him to fish and hunt before taking him out for his first duck hunt at the age of 10. “All of a sudden, [the sky] went from black to light blue, and everything went from dead silence to full of life, with big ducks zipping around,” John said. He was hooked.
Assisting USGS, John tagged a wood duck with a “GPS backpack.” The data was used to better understand the movement ecology of nesting hen wood ducks.
John remembers attending local Ducks Unlimited banquets with our dad, where people around Texarkana observed John’s growing waterfowl interest. One observer was Tommy Cabaniss, former state chairman of Ducks Unlimited and our neighbor. Tommy suggested that John meet his friend Bob Butler, a senior regional director for Ducks Unlimited, to discuss attending the Ducks Unlimited Greenwing Conservation Camp in Stuttgart, Arkansas. At 15, John spent a weekend at Ducks Unlimited President George Dunklin Jr.’s Five Oaks Duck Lodge, learning about wetland conservation from experts with the Arkansas Game and Fish Commission (AGFC), Ducks Unlimited, and Rich-N-Tone Duck Calls.
“[Greenwing Conservation Camp] was my first exposure to really understanding the practice of conservation and seeing people from all these different realms together in one space,” John said. At the conclusion of the camp, John was named 2012 Camper of the Year, an award voted on by the camp’s staff, which he remembers as a spark in his career journey.
John harvested and weighed mallards at Five Oaks Duck Lodge (owned by George Dunklin in Stuttgart, Arkansas) for his master’s research.
John presented a copy of his master’s thesis to George Dunklin (former AGFC commissioner, Ducks Unlimited president, and owner of Five Oaks Duck Lodge). George hosted the camp that John attended as a high schooler.
Along with their English setter, Scout, John’s dad, Bob Veon, took him on his first quail hunt in southwest Arkansas.
John helped the Arkansas Game and Fish Commission capture and relocate a nuisance alligator from a residential area in 2016.
submitted photos
Interestingly, John didn’t channel this experience into a career path until after studying at Hendrix College, where his time was spent playing football and studying for medical school. However, his curiosity continued to draw him back to wildlife. In 2016, John was selected to be the intern for AGFC’s Southwest Office. Like many pre-med students, he also sought out campus research opportunities, and this is where he
met Dr. Maureen McClung, professor of ornithology and ecology. She noticed John’s outdoorsman and management experiences and believed they might be of benefit to her lab’s research. Together, John and Dr. McClung developed a study investigating traffic noise disturbance in wintering waterbirds; the results were published in a coauthored paper in the Journal of Wildlife Management.
John’s undergraduate research was supervised by Dr. Maureen McClung. The two are pictured here after John was awarded Distinction in Biology.
In 2021, John joined Dr. Mike Brasher, senior waterfowl scientist at Ducks Unlimited, on an episode of the Ducks Unlimited Podcast. The episode, titled “Are Arkansas Mallards Fatter Today than 40 Years Ago?” covers John’s master’s research.
John teaches UC Davis undergraduate and graduate students about the importance of wetland management for waterfowl food resources.
John graduated from the University of Arkansas with his master of science in biology in December 2021. From left to right; Debbie (mother), John, Greer (sister), and Bob Veon (father).
This experience, along with encouragement from various Greenwing Camp experts John had professionally reconnected with, redirected him from medicine to research. He applied to several programs before landing at the University of Arkansas, where he earned a master’s degree in biology, studying trends in mallard body mass in the Lower Mississippi Alluvial Valley. John continued his work in bridging connections between hunters and scientists within the state under the shared value of conserving the beloved landscape and their species.
In 2021, towards the end of John’s graduate program, mentor and AGFC Chief of Wildlife Luke Naylor connected him to a project being developed by a collaborative team of researchers at the University of California–Davis regarding integrated wetland management techniques for mosquito control and wildlife conservation. John connected the lead researchers on the project before being accepted by the UC Davis Graduate Group of Ecology, one of the top ecology programs in the country. He is now in his fourth year of the project. With his new experiences, John hopes eventually to lead a research lab in applied ecology, with a focus on waterfowl and wetlands.
John noted that it was those in Texarkana who made the first observations about his interests and worked to nurture his curiosity. John’s advice to anyone chasing a career in research is to stay curious, open to new ideas, and persistent. “Kind of like a good duck hunt where all the pieces come together—let that hope keep bringing you back,” he said.
SCENE ABOUT TOWN
THE 3RD ANNUAL FESTIVAL OF TREES WAS HELD AT THE TEXARKANA ARKANSAS CONVENTION CENTER NOVEMBER 6TH–8TH.
Sarah and Joel Wright
Courtney Shoalmire and Monica Carr
Olivia Dowd and Natasha Dowd
Cindy Allensworth and Ginger Wells
Keira Nienkamp, Kerry Nienkamp, and Ainsley Nienkamp
Katie Peek, Angie Hopkins, and Ashley Allday
Dr. Sudheer and Morgan Jayaprabhu with Jessica Haas
Cori Mobbs and Shea Phillips
Elizabeth Lofton and Jennifer Cole
Judy Priest, Scott Swenson, and Cindy Smith
Jessica Haas with Kimberly and Braden McDaniel
Dr. Christina Payne, Ashley Carlow, Elizabeth Lofton, Bridget Contreras, Dr. Cindy Porter, and Catie Swenson
Jana Ward, Yolanda Cook, Sharon Mitchell, Rachel Overmyer, Kerry Tietze, Mollee Thomason, and Cindra Messer
Kylie and Brody Jennings
Emily in
BE PRESENT
by EMILY GAMMON
There are no “quick” trips when you’re with me. It’s an inherited extrovert trait I got from my mom. We affectionately call it being “trip trapped.” We run into people we know everywhere we go, and then we stop to catch up, and suddenly a 10-minute grocery trip has turned into an hour-long adventure.
Sometimes I have to give myself a pep talk when the errand list is 38 items long. “Emily, focus. You’re in and out. You are only entering this store to grab x, y, and z. Don’t make eye contact with anyone. In and out.”
I had a day like that yesterday—with every spare minute allotted in order to accomplish all the things that had to be done by 3:30 school pick-up. So, naturally, while I was rushing around Sam’s to grab three specific things, I turned onto an aisle and came head-on with a friend I hadn’t seen in a while. There was no running or hiding.
All it took was a simple, “How have you been?” and the dam broke.
I began to “word vomit” all the things I had been holding internally, and then there were tears, right there in the smack-dab middle of Sam’s Club at 11 a.m.
“I just don’t feel adult enough to handle these things,” I told her. Sure, I’m a full-blown adult. I have a husband, a mortgage, bills, and four children I’m responsible for. Even still, I feel like I’m 15
years old. Surely, someone else is supposed to be in charge. She said, “I know exactly what you mean. It’s ‘imposter syndrome.’ I feel the same way.”
I had never voiced that to anyone, so then I began to wonder: do we all feel that? At what point will I feel like a grown up?
No matter the answer to that, I’ve blinked, and I’m 31. I know it will only be one more blink and my children will be grown and out of the house, and then I’ll reminisce about and crave the chaos I feel now.
So, I’m going to embrace it because, yes, my kids only get one childhood, but also, these are the best years of my life. I don’t want to miss a single moment.
As we pulled out the Christmas decor, I told my husband, Joey, “I really don’t know what vibe I’m going for this year. I can’t decide.”
He replied, “Just do fun. That’s the best, and it’s what you’re good at. Who cares if it’s perfectly curated?”
So, fun it is! Our home will never be magazinephoto–worthy, but it will definitely never lack on memories.
We have hand-cut snowflakes to hang from the ceilings (followed by a whole life lesson on how there are no two snowflakes alike and God makes each one individually). We’ve made and painted salt dough ornaments; it was messy and stressful, but also a core memory I will hold onto.
As cliche as it may be, deep down, your children (and everyone else on Earth, if we are being honest) crave presence over presents.
Opening presents on Christmas morning is fun. The excitement and gratitude makes it worth it. But, 30 minutes later, it’s over, and we’re cleaning up, and the kids are fighting over who has what and not sharing (y’all know I’m telling the truth, and if that doesn’t happen in your house, then you don’t have enough children!). The presents are fleeting, but the moments we look back on and remember through the years are the moments of presence. It’s the friend on the Sam’s Club snack aisle hugging you and wiping tears. It’s the laughter of your kids mixing paint colors and hanging their handmade ornaments on the tree. It’s singing Christmas carols in the car and driving around looking at lights. These may be the best years of their life, but they’re your best years, too.
So be present, and soak up every minute.
