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s y a d i d n po

By Fasal Gibran

Dedicating for my dearest and nearest ‘B’

Pondi days...


Pondi days...

Pondi days...


Dedication For memories, Friends who made me thinking myself? Campus, For giving such a plot for this non played drama Everyone , For their patience When I annoyed them with my grievances Letters, For they received my concepts Papers For they absorbed those letters You, For the ownership of that letters

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Preface I don’t think about preface for these pages, because, there were no preface for my memories when they began to follow me... there were no formalities of getting permission from anyone because, the memories were begun so.

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I have not forgotten you I have not forgotten you I thought about you still now, for you have given me many blessed memories I have not forgotten you for you hold my hand when I slipped on the life. I have not forgotten you for you have taught me well each lessons of life, beyond the limits of syllabus. I have not forgotten you for you corrected me when I spelled mistakes, without any punishments. Because, I can’t forget that time When you were with me, The breezy days of my life Where I found myself Pleased

Pondi days... Mangalore express The day, I got the red flag to my memories. eventhough I took the ticket, I was expelled from the compartment, A private compartment, where I kept my memories, I.e. -someone’s mind. I experienced the power of a single SMS, It became the villain of that journey. Window shutters were wet a lot, With the rain, pain drops. Didn’t you gaze me once? As I was in deep of the grief. When the ‘memory express’ Departed from platform, From the remembrance to the loneliness. From noisy to silence. From life to death… As only the empty filthy tracks were infront of me. But, I didn’t put the fire on memories, Even I was arranged the sticks to burn… Only one pain was there; I couldn’t gave a single good bye too... But, my heart consoled me; Hadn’t you asked the permission to love? No, then why?

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A pledge I don’t believe in future Because, The present couldn’t gave me What the past dreamed Although, your eyes Make me dream again and again… Today I saw a globe within those eyelids A dark bluish planet with a heart beat For some days, it have been encircling my heart It feels more scorching than the VENUS I think, that may be absorbed from my heart But, I assure you I can’t bid adieu or wave a ‘good bye’ Like the science abolished the PLUTO Till the beats and heats of heart remain… I assure myself, that I will conquer that ‘planet ’ Before science touch the MARS.

Pondi days... Micromax X226 It is my second heart, Filled with some of ‘memorable’ messages, Soothing gazals of Umbai and Jagjith Singh, And the magical melodies of A. R. Rahman. Its each song had a reason to listen, Whenever I walked out to the top of Kannadasan, Loaded with grieves and hopes. It fell down many times, but Nothing made it to be repaired, like my heart. Whenever you listened to my own song collections, and Gave a ‘memorable feedback’, I praised the lord who gave me such a ‘memory card’.

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On the bay of Bengal… When I sat in salty sands Bay of Bengal has some clue about me -I don’t know whether the Arabian Sea shared it Or anyone elseLooked me sympathetic With some spongy waves As said, “like you I have millions of gloomy subscribers From the Bengal to Kanyakumari... I coldn’t regain their lost dreams till this wave Still they are coming to me with a hope Looking for my presence, Consoling their grieves, broken hearts Sometimes I too spoiled my tears when listened to their quivering lips and shrieking eyes Sometimes I got angry on their ‘friends’ for their ‘half commitment’ on friendship You are one of them, Do you think? Me was salted by any chemicals? only the chemical drown from the gloomy eyes made me thus, So, I can’t ignore you Your salty drops…

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Inbox letters Here, I am the only one… Wandering in the turbulent ocean, to find a shore… Like the ‘Pi’!!... With a bundle of lost dreams, It seems more dangerous than the ‘Bengal tiger’... God made me idiotic, When I failed in front of a ‘text message… “Why r u sending dis kind of msg to me? I feel a kind of ‘FAKE’ in Ur messages… Don’t send me such messages again….” Then time was midnight, With full moon lit night sky, My inbox didn’t find any replies… ‘Anyone can express the sincerity in a text message?’ I don’t think so. I did mistakes more and more… But, wasn’t this its answer, Punishment? You can misunderstand me, but not about my heart, It knows only one, one name, one pain, one pleasure…. You know who that ‘one’ was? Don’t make me wander in gigantic waves of Atlantic… Please…

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Hopes of darkness The nights, I cursed my eyelids, Knocked more doors of dreams. Clock’s hands were Dead asleep; Embraced each other. Crickets had Forgotten to chirp and cheep, Even the moon was Deprived of sleep. How can I close my eyes? Tears are likely to spill out. How can I embrace my dreams? If dreams are transient. In the darkling moments of life, Where the stars of hopes were not, What I coveted for was a sunrise, But it was still pitch-darkness.  

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SIM A Vodafone If my SIM A rings its tone Eagerly will look for her message Most of the time Vodafone have confused me a lot. Giving the unwanted talk time offers, Do I need such offers Mr. Vodafone? Here I am struggling to get a single SMS If I had got a chance to talk Your talk time offers wouldn’t have be enough Even if this happened so You have supported me a lot Giving many SMS offers Sometimes you helped me with your ‘great network’ By giving her messages Even after 12 hours of its sending!!!! Although , I didn’t changed my SIM till today Like my desires...

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Black buddy Why I wondered in dark nights Searching my shades Looked at the back Even I am sure of its presence with me When everyone waved their hand ‘Good bye’… Only my shadow was with me As a believable one Although, the doom gave it a ‘dark color’ In days, accompanied me even its killing sun shine In nights, as a cradle, where my eye drops slept It had loved me lot as silent Likely said to me; ‘I can’t be away from you’ Even though, I couldn’t know that silent amity till today Today, even in this full moon night I have to embarrass my own shadow I have to pay all of my adores before my buddy Where I couldn’t express it till this day

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Birthday In a cold and dark night, When the clock ringed 12, Roommates gave me a surprise. -My first ever celebrated ‘B day’… My message inbox got a lot of wishes, But, My Micromax didn’t ring its message tone again… With that wishes, what I expected, as the tears made me sleep. Lied to heart; sometimes, she may don’t remember these…. Woke up early hearing the message tone, That surprised me with an e-card in Gmail inbox. I had to give something… But, sometimes, we can’t do what we want do. even though, we are scolding life as drama, forgetting our faults and mistakes, this was my discern, got as a birthday gift

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Life and Death Life; Sweetest for one, Drowning deep with no hope. Acrid to one, Resorting to a piece of rope. Memories; Springs are memories When summer comes. Companion for one isolated, Trailer of one, blaming past. Dreams; Guest in loneliness, And the moments of silence. Demon in crowd, Tyrant in time of violence.

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Death; Wanted for one, Who spends life with agony. Sourest for one, Who lends hearts with no money.  

Some realities You know that the reality, Darren deserts are host of yours. Under a scorching globe, Only your shadow is the friend of yours. And the solitude, Gnawing the mind of yours. What faulted my love to be refused? When I stretched hands to you. By the time I yearned, Bunch of letters of memories, Broken down in hearts, You had gone beyond sight. How can I tell myself that? The truth, you aren’t with. It will be easy to consol the heart, With a lie and to offer a wreath, But how can I forgive, Those acrid realities. What a meaningless screech of one, Lost the foothold in buoyant water. When hope’s doors were closed, And heart were throbbing the last, I knew that the truth; Till now, I was loving my soul itself.

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Incomplete lines... Pupil of your eye, A globule Rotating in heart… Your words, Melodies, Written for a musician… Your footprints, Yachts in, Tumultuous Ocean… Your memories, Waves, kissing shores, Again, again… Tend to embrace the shores…  

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Semester 1 Where ever I went, felt like a desert. New faces, I struggled to become familiar with them. Different world, I fought to live there. Confusing diversity, I failed to adjust with. Even though there were killing hot days and soothing nights, Time was gone quickly. ‘We’ lived as strangers, facing with formal smiles, Which caught the mind later I don’t remember that day we met first. However i have enough memory to remember the day we closed our wet eyelids

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Red Now, Letters of my calendar Are red colored. The dreams, In my mind Are also red. The sand grains too, Indulging Under the foot; Are gore-coloured. The eye drops, Lying in the lap, When memories are Omitted as Salty drops, Have now a red colour.

 

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Caution!!! Landmarks are for strangers at the way. Memories are to die in old age. Dreams are for one who loves one. Dreams and memories are Stranger for one who roams with no route. Landmarks are trifle for one who thirsts for love. where is the oasis, There is the aim. Memories are his landmarks, And dreams are his travel-provisions.  

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Losses of a Life How can I Forget memories, Those obsessive moments, Gifted of Burning yesterdays. Accustomed to hunt; When I dream a painless world. And meditating for what You forbade me. And prostrating to a might who made me myself. I had been scaring those arrows, of a hunter, hitting bullseye. And I had been blamed by myself, to meet the friend as stranger.  

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Hopes and Fates When realities Overcame the speculations, Grieves managing to suppress The passions and hopes. We are pressured To tussle with fate. Sometimes fates Become belligerent, And we become Thirsty to revel the life. Fairy memories are Sabotaging Coloured hopes. Eventually, Departure takes A role of a villain character, And some hot tears Trickle in the aftermath.

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Unknown musician

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Who strummed The strings of heart, In an evening Bereft of wind? Who mixed The taste of eye drops In the rain drops Which fell Through the leaves? Some are cursing me, As obstinate, They haven’t queried me Anything yet. What can I do? With a heart, To be burnt to a cinder. Blood has clotted in artery, Because of that momentum When I tried to cling the hopes.

12’O Clock Have you found ever, Those moments; Clinging three of them Each others. Recalling our dignity Twenty four times a day, As a statue of unity. One, though he is more hectic, Waits others for that momentum. Momentarily they forget Status of their own size. You may have seen them As in sound sleep, But they are tossing and turning To awaken ourselves.  

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Confession In affection to you, I am not an absconder, But, you were evacuating me Unbelievable, unexpected like a thunder, In sizzling nights of summer. How can I convict my wishes? To lurk in to what in your rib, Even hopes were falling down as ashes, When I read some words of your sharp nib. Why you are defining my desire as vehement? And avenging to me by a staggering heart. How will be one love; fervent, Until you will come here.

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Paintings in mind At last, I completed my painting Likely looking to a Ravi Varma’s work Feeling the beauty of simplicity Smell of pure sandal fragrance. It was a presence, made me as in heaven There were no chemical fragrances of ‘trends’ Or any chemical beauties of ‘brands’ There were no polished nails Although, that fingers touched the mind’s strings Didn’t shaded with eye-markers Although, that eyes were marked in the heart Didn’t put the face for facial creams Although, that face charmed the mind Didn’t bowed the less-length hair to shampoos Although, felt as softy when it flew through my face Didn’t colored the lips as pink Although, it spoke to the mind Moreover, Didn’t bargained with the heart Although, still I am loving the heart only

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Mistake Sometimes mistakes becomes as boon Like the NO BALL gives the FREE HIT FOUL PLAY gives the PENALTY But, these are other’s mistakes Not ours Here, I got a mistake Even was a verbal mistake It happened in real life too!!! I won’t erase or correct that Because Sometimes mistakes too have a relief Relief from imposed laws of nature Even if it is a sin too I wish to live in the world of sins

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Question paper When I was sitting in front of a white paper Filled by some dark letters Mocking with question marks!! Challenging my prejudices of an exam hall… There were no previous question papers to study Except your previous memories There were no short notes to remember But, your short gazes, I had no exam guide notes I hadn’t seen even the syllabus Although, I wrote what they asked My blue ink overwhelmed that dark letters When I enclosed the answer sheet The mind told me ‘don’t try to win… But try not to be defeated’ But, I felt that reality, that If I become defeated by you That defeat too had a honeyed taste.

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Because rose has thorn on it Don’t be bewitched In magic of a wizard, You know It is easy to inflame an ember. Don’t leap before bargain an orchard, Why you become idle to enter. “All that glitters is not gold” But, how pearls with no glaze are sold? What makes you so bold? Bold to face one heartily, What fault in a desire? Desire to love one Overtly and covertly. Who else doubts, In the beauty And fragrance of rose. I can bear any pain Because rose has thorn on it.

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Poet If the love was lacking, ‘we’ may not be created. If the departure wasn’t a reality, ‘we’ may not be meeting together. Pain, agony………….and, Tears and cheers weren’t here, ‘we’ may be missing this heart. If these memories were not there, I may not be left lonesome. If there weren’t hopes, This poem [poet] may Not be waiting for you.

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Q&A To setting sun; “Can you wait a while..? I have to give you A bundle of agonies” To rising sun; “Oh! Don’t disturb now Darkness and solitude Are in their honeymoon. Grief and dream Have met for the first “Be tolerant please….”

Pondi days... Clicked memories When I borrowed a Nikon D90 from lab, There were no clue that; it will focus on a heart. When I set the ‘aperture’ of my frame, And adjusted the ‘shutter speed’ for an object, I hadn’t expected that you will be present there in frame. Whenever you were in the frame, I didn’t felt difficult to get the ‘depth of field’. How can I forget that dawn? When the dew drops were hided beyond the leafs, Our zoom lenses followed them. I saw the mirror image of us in those shining drops, Where, we were closer than they reflected. Now my SD card is full of our pictures, Colored with the Red of soil Green of nature, blue of sky (RGB), I can’t format these data till the last snap of my life.

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Exam days When the mind were collided with marketing mix, With a fear of exam, (The most entertaining three hours) I made my own product in heart!! Even though I confused about its ‘4Ps’… I found my own way; “Product = feeling somewhat from heart, usually called ‘love’, Price = I tried, but I couidn’t calculate. Place = there were no pine forests or apple gardens like for kahlil Gibran, But I found the whole world where Gibran, Rumi lived. Promotion = did. But, I couidn’t promote it like zoozoo did. However, I promoted it in my mind, blood, stare, movements.” DDE grass will remember that day, When two minds were confused of ‘Media branding and Marketing’… Your nearness taught me a syllabus, of life, success, and ‘Some’ chapters of subject too. On those humid days, the breezy memories made me arrogant, But there was no much length for that pride. Although I passed the paper with a seventy percentage, ‘Internal result’ was very poor.

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Some of my sins, not faults Don’t look at anyone’s face, But to heart. Don’t chase anyone If you haven’t any target. Don’t be sandwiched Between two hearts (!) Then you will be named “selfish”. Don’t give anyone your sincerity, Then you will be called “coward”. Don’t trifle anyone’s smile, You may be winning with thetrue one.  

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‘Sky Painter’ When the ‘sky painter’ comes in morning, I used to hear chirping of a sparrow. Which was nestled in my garden, Gnawing the grains seemed to be sorrow. What makes the nature so cruel? It compartmentalized everything. Dashed hopes of many mates, And now my sparrow has lost something. How will be the thirst? Thirst of lake to embrace the land, Desire of rambling clouds, Is keen to spill on thirsty sand. Are you annoyed to spin me a tale? How can I believe a tale when I suspect in fact Will you bestow me her cage back? Cage of memories of vain dreams not in act.

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Grieves in piano How songs I sang? Emotively in the limelight. Songs for me and you. Songs of desperate night. But now there is nothing to remind, Also you haven’t anything remained. You may have seen the rain-drops Falling to hands of dancing trees, But you couldn’t differ eye-drops Oozing on the cheeks with cries. I told, taught love to more, But was weakling to score. You may haven’t known Once, I have seen a heaven, Oaring in your eye-lids. And a brook, flowing In your murmuring words.

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Good bye I hadn’t came here to say a ‘goodbye’ But, with a bundle of dreams, Where else I will go now? I can’t wave goodbye with my hands It has been died by its lost memories, when you touched me first in hands. I saw my hands as pride Laughing at the heart, For their overwhelming the heart, Which was ‘proposed’ you first. Now, memories too began to die If you can, forget me Forget my memories… Forget the ways, Where we made our terrible dreams Forget the colors Where we added our imaginations Forget the books Where we found our own signatures Forget the past Where we met first and last Goodbye…

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Pondi days...


About the author

Born as small member of a ‘big family’ Seems as silent But, violent Looking ‘smart’!! But, not so much Sometimes, writes reads (Not syllabus) Most of times, dies in music, gazals Along with the memories, given as boon Completed the degree From the soil of Zamorine ‘Calicut’ Now, wandering in the streets of Aurabindo; ‘Pondicherry’ For a post graduation, He have confessed with an another book Named as ‘two pencils’

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