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Family Constellation

than other girls with "her boys'" successes, especially when they accept her nurturance and care. She cart give them comfort and consolation, and does it with a certain satisfaction. When other people are in trouble, they come to her, and she likes that The younger brother of a sister is usually allowed to pursue his own wishes and interests in a rather carefree and sometimes even in a selfish or incoherent manner. He is treated more tolerantly and more generously than his big sister, and frequently more so than, say, a younger brother of a brother. The younger brother of a sister increasingly learns to understand his sister better, but he does so ultimately for his own purposes. He tends to take her help and motherly care as a matter of course. If he cannot get what he wants, he finds ways to lure his sister or other girls into acting as mother on his behalf. A little pretense of helplessness or a minor compliment may already do the trick. There are also good possibilities for identification and interaction with the parents in this configuration. The older sister can play mother for her brother or her father; the brother, in turn, could play father for his sister and his mother. The sister does this, but the brother tends not to, and may encounter some disapproval over his reluctance or tardiness. He is accused of selfishness and indifference. He does not think of others enough. He does whatever he pleases. He lets them help and wait on him. In conclusion, we can say that the younger brother of a sister and the older sister of a brother both remain more interested in contacts with peers of the opposite sex than of the same sex. Even outside the family the sister tends to wish to direct and care for boys and young men, whereas the brother is likely to entice girls and women to mother and spoil him while he continues to do what he wants without much regard for others. Parents, incidentally, tend to approve of such a course of development, since the brother is the younger and smaller one. Some parents are initially disturbed by the fact that the relationship between their children is the converse of roles assumed in conven-

Profile for FamilyConstellation

Walter Toman - Family Constellation - Its Effects on Personality and Social Behavior  

Walter Toman - Family Constellation - Its Effects on Personality and Social Behavior

Walter Toman - Family Constellation - Its Effects on Personality and Social Behavior  

Walter Toman - Family Constellation - Its Effects on Personality and Social Behavior

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