P16_Families Leeds Feb 2019.qxp_Layout 1 24/02/2019 20:22 Page 11
Education
Supporting Your Child with Exam Stress As SATs tests approach in May, it can be a pressured and overwhelming time for the children sitting them and their parents. Here, children’s councillor Vicky Bellman shares some advice… Stress and anxiety in young children is particularly heightened as they deal with performance-related concerns, and their behaviour may suffer during a stress peak. It’s important to do what you can to respond from a place of calm. Invite them to join you in feeling calm, rather than you joining them in emotional chaos. With that in mind, here are a few tips on supporting your child at this time:
building blocks for emotional wellbeing. Make sure that your child is getting enough good food, water and sleep!
Free time is Vital
Yes, of course exams are important. But everyone involved needs to remember it's not the end of the world if there’s a hiccup and things don’t go as well as expected. There is almost always another chance.
It’s a difficult balancing act, but it’s important to remember that primary school age children need plenty of free time – structured studying has to be balanced with plenty of unstructured free time. Relaxation and fun are vital. Getting outside to play and spending time relaxing with family and friends are super-important at this time. A useful analogy to share with your children is that human beings are basically machines. We need fuel, and we also need to switch our engine off every now and again. Otherwise, we risk overheating!
Help Manage Expectations
Make Time for You
Working longer than is advisable for their age, or expecting grades significantly higher than their capabilities could well be detrimental to your child’s emotional and mental well-being. It’s important you guide your children appropriately in this area.
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Your children need more from you when preparing for and going through exams or tests. To be able to give more you need to be able to have more fuel in the tank.
Keep it in Perspective
Encourage Good Work Habits Primary school children may find it hard to sustain concentration for longer than 30 minutes without a break. It’s important not to schedule too many study sessions in one day – one or two would be the appropriate maximum for this age group on a weekend or school holiday day, but less if they are also managing homework. Otherwise your child will become stressed and it’s much harder for them to learn under pressure.
Remember the Building Blocks
Connection is Important Make sure you have family down time; perhaps, watching a movie one night with popcorn, or going for a family walk, or day out. Don’t just save the treats for the exam results, as this reinforces to children that they have more value when they achieve more. Let them know that their wellbeing and enjoyment of life is as vital when they’re striving for success, as well as when they’re achieving it. Vicky Bellman is a counsellor at Fegans, a charity which counsels children and provides support for parents. For more parenting advice on stress and mental health, visit: www.fegans.org.uk/parent
Again, when it comes to the real basics, we can easily forget the
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