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Issue 2


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Friday the 18th of November



The Official Newspaper of the 50th International Session

Italy Changes Constitution

By Karlis the Latvian Blooded Swede

I N S I D E TH I S I S S U E :

More World News


Committee Articles



Culture and Entertainment from




Italy's parliament has given final approval to a controversial bill proposing major constitutional reforms - the first in 60 years. The Constitutional Reform Bill will eventually devolve extensive powers from Rome to Italy's 20 regions and cut the number of MPs in both houses. It also strengthens the powers of the prime minister. The Senate - or upper house - endorsed the bill by 170 votes to 132 on Wednesday evening. It has been pushed through parliament at the behest of the small but influential Northern League political party - a key member

of Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi's governing coalition. The Northern League is headed by Umberto Bossi, who suffered a heart attack nearly two years ago, forcing him to give up his cabinet post. He returned to Rome for the first time since his illness to take part in the vote. The left-wing opposition leader Romano Prodi said it was a sad day for Italy. The opposition plans to call a national referendum to repeal the reform bill before any major changes actually take effect under the new law. The major transfer of power to the regions is not due to take place until 2012 and

Sri Lankan’s Go To The Polls Today thirteen million people shall be eligible to vote in Sri Lanka’s fourth national poll in six years, an election which observers say is key to the future of the country. Members of the Tamil minority in areas controlled and patrolled by the rebel group the Tamil Tigers have decided to boycott the vote, however. Sri Lanka, with a bloody political past, has seen a peaceful lead-up to this election but the boycotting by the Tamil’s in the north and east threatens to harm the chances of the oppositon leader Mr Wickramasinghe.

certain other constitutional changes are not due to be implemented until 2015.

Two Indonesians die from bird flu

Two more people have died from the H5N1 strain of bird flu in Indonesia, raising the number of deaths there to seven, the health ministry said. Tests were carried out on a woman and a teenage girl, both from Jakarta, who died earlier this month after coming into contact with dead chickens. The H5N1 virus has killed more than 60 people in South East Asia since the latest outbreak began in 2003.

Reported by Mark “Mad Dog” McDaid

Germany’s new government plan released

By Xavier “Bubba the Schrimp Killer” Chancellor-designate Angela Merkel has high ambitions for the future "grand coalition" with her political rivals. Germany's two big parties - Mrs Merkel's conservative Christian Democrats (CDU) and the centre-left Social Democrats (SPD) - have approved a coalition agreement setting out the policies of the next government for four years. Mrs Merkel now looks assured of being elected chancellor in a parliamentary vote on 22 November. She claims the accord advances her party's key goals - overdue economic reforms and rebuilding the trust of the US and other countries. But the Social Democrats seem to have got the better of the deal, in the allocation of ministries and key policies areas. The SPD has the top jobs in eight ministries, including those of foreign affairs, finance and labour. The CDU and its partners from the Bavarian Christian Social Union (CSU) head six ministries, including defence and economic affairs. But the customary powers of the chancellor, to set or change the direction of government policies, will be much restricted in a "grand coalition". Instead, the comprehensive 143-page agreement sets out what the government can and cannot do. Any serious deviation could lead to its collapse, yet Germany's business leaders wanted Mrs Merkel to push through her radical reform agenda. She has had to scrap or water down most of it, as

follows: REVERSED: Plans to cut income tax rates for high and standard earners were abandoned. Instead top earners must pay a tax surcharge of 3% SCRAPPED: Plans to extend the life of German nuclear power plants SHELVED: Plans for more liberalisation of Germany's rigid employment laws, which experts say would help to get more people into work. In foreign policy the arguments have been more muted. Among the changes foreseen are: An end to anti-Americanism; the agreement says Germany will not see itself as a counterweight to the US, but as a partner; A firmer commitment to the Nato alliance as well as the EU; the Schroeder government backed controversial plans with France, which some saw as a challenge to Nato; Fair and open dealings in Europe; Germany will be more mindful of the concerns of Poland and other EU states; the old Franco-German partnership will cease to be exclusive; Turkey: Germany sees Turkey's bid for EU membership as problematic and will go on pushing for a "privileged partnership" as an alternative.

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P P aa g g ee 22

A letter from the Godparents

This is George who ALSO wanted his picture in the newspaper. Happy now?

Well all, it’s another one of those days. The venue has changed and so has the Money Press room. This time it’s in an airport - merely to better organise the arrival of our international Mafioso partners to the Big meeting we’re having. Co-ordination of international controversies and money-laundering projects takes a lot of meetings. Fortunately, being the Godparents, we’ve been able to take a little time from the meeting and spend it in the marvellous GA venue. The policemen cower in our presence and all, in general, is wonderful. In addition, the appearance of food raised our spirits no end. One might find it surprising that in a country where food is prized above all, there is very little time to eat any. Ah well… surely there will be fantastic dishes at the Big Boss meeting Saturday night.

-> This is Thomas Ramopoulos– he wanted his picture in the newspaper. Sorry Thomas, it was the only picture we could find.

Also, as promised, included are pictures of people who feel they deserve to be on the front page of La Baritone. We don’t feel they’re as interesting as Bird Flu and the Italian Constitution so we have placed them on page two. With murderous looks and wishes for our own personal Lavazza stand…

This is Jill. She also wanted her picture in the newspaper. This is not the pink hat the Journos stole. Danny cool.

Heili and Jonny

It’s those darn orgas again..

They’re here, they’re there, they’re absolutely everywhere! We just wanted to extend a warm thank you to ALL OF YOU—

especially Alessandra, Danny and Giulia for all the hard work put in to the session. It wouldn’t have been possible with out you. Also, everyone who sets up all the coffee breaks and everyone who makes sure we get on the buses in the mornings and everyone who runs when we

need paper and everyone who finds our lost things. Also, those who drive us from GA to the Press Room and back again and everyone who shows us wonderful Italian style and for fantastic Italian smiles and….. Oh oh oh… you’re just fabulous. Thank you Thank you Thank you! - The Journos

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C u r r e n t n e w s f o r m t h e s e s s i o n During the last day of committee work many interesting things happened; the organizers created their best friend “Marco”, THE BOX was stolen (twice!) and many many more things. The Journos were being blackmailed by anonymous people and there were threat letters constantly arriving from unknown locations. Let’s talk more about Marco and his being the loveliest creature on this side of the Earth. At the committee work venue he has his own corner from which he directs his operations; he has control over all of the Orgas who obey him at all costs. But of course, here’s what happened today. Some nasty Smellygates stole Marco’s bag from under the Orgas’ noses! Marco was really angry about this and all of the lovely organisers immediately left the jobs they had at hand to start a frantic search for the suitcase. Though it was finally brought back by the kidnappers, if you had seen the quest for the bag you surely would have been interested to know how interesting it was W h e r e t h e s t r e e t s h a v e n o n a m e


p r e s s r o o m o d y s s e y

Yesterday, the press room was… somewhere in Bari. Luckily, for the learnéd bariologist, finding the press room is not at all difficult. Here is Dr. Maternus van Schlinkenbuehls famous description of the route from the CWvenue to the hallowed press room halls: Walking out of the CW-venue, walk along the city wall, due south. Take either the first, second or third stairs to your right, due west, walk through the archway you find in front of you, and turn back right (back south).

Follow this small alleyway through all its turns, past the dustbins and the shouting Italian lady on the third floor, until, by passing through another gateway, you reach the Church of St. Nicola. Turn left (due west). As soon as you have walked past the church, turn right. According to all maps of Bari, there should be a street in front of you. There isn’t: there is only a wall, and a few confused Dutch people who want to go to the Cathedral. As you want to get to the Cathedral, too, help them find it by going through the archway due west and taking the first small alleyway on your right. Do not, under any circumstances, let yourself be run over by children on motorbikes. This area of Bari is known to scholars as “BariMordor” – keep hold of your belongings, limbs, clothes etc.

to see the Journos look for the box. Approximately five minutes before the bag was stolen, the orgas had kidnapped THE BOX and demanded 200 Lornies if we wanted it back in one piece (even though it consists of two bits: the lid and the box). Unfortunately they had put THE BOX in THE BAG, so when the bag was stolen the box automatically left with it (obviously!,orgas,orgas,orgas..). Later on in the day the bag was returned in one piece but with one surprise: The Box was no longer inside the bag. The Journos started putting up posters in order to retrieve the bag. During lunch our Dear Madame President was taken hostage by a journo and was threatened with having a staple put in her ear every hour that the box wasn’t returned. The kidnappers couldn’t put their dear session president in harms way so they gave up and returned the box with more gossip than ever…(great fun for bored journos)!!

Hakan “Quickwit”

If you have followed the instructions, to the letter, you will hit the Cathedral after approximately 500 meters. Turn left and help the lost French couple make their way to St. Nicola. Then turn back because the left was a dead end. So, to the right. Pass by the Cathedral (which is incidentally smaller than St. Nicola Church) steps and you will walk directly into a passageway called “Strada Dei Dottula”. This Strada is easy to find, as there is a bar directly opposite called, who would have believed it, “Bar”. Pass the sign: “XXIV Congresso Eucaristico Nazionale 21-29 maggio 2005” and get hit by a car. Stand up and continue down the Strada Dei… Turn left after 50 meters onto the parking lot where the most noticeable feature is a row of dustbins. Follow the dustbins. They lead you directly to “Corte Lamberti” – go in,

Eros Ramazzotti and Laura Pausini.

Italian music Born out of the strains of melodrama, the melodic traditions of Italian song have seen many a change over the past forty years, starting with Domenico Modugno. This tradition has never lost its charm, confirmed by the fact that singers like Nilla Pizzi and Al Bano are still very popular abroad, essentially responsible for the success also of modern singers such as

The explosion of rock ‘n’ roll influenced and altered Italian song from the outset: this was the time when wild young stars like Mina, Adriano Celentano, Rita Pavone and Gianni Morandi made their mark. However a truly original current in Italian song is the singer songwriter phenomenon. For Gino Paoli, Luigi Tenco, Bruno Lauzi and Sergio Endrigo, songs could express a world of inner feelings that was artistically autonomous; also the songs of Fabrizio De Andrè, while influenced by the music of Bob Dylan and Leonard Cohen, reflect a tendency towards a world of intimate thought; Roberto Vecchioni explored individual inner feelings by telling tales of Milan and its private emotions; the music of Lucio Battisti for the first time inventively blended the characteristics of American rhythm ‘n’ blues with the Italian melodic style, using simple yet dramatic language. Other major names in Italian music are Claudio Baglioni, Antonello Venditti, poets and ballad singersongwriters such as Francesco De Gregori and Francesco Guccini and rock artists such as Vasco Rossi, Ligabue, Zucchero. The story of Lucio Dalla from Bologna is quite unique: he began his career as a player in a jazz band and

even though you are sure you are hopelessly lost. Turn left, go under the arch. Try and get through the door on the left. You will find it is locked. Do not try and force your way in, you are simply in the wrong place. Retrace your steps, and go the other direction – turn right into the first door, and YOU HAVE MADE IT!!! You may now pick up your certificate “Master of EYP Orientation” Only one tip, guys. Do not EVER use a map. Most streets on the maps of Bari either do not exist or are, in fact, walls. Seek professional help when trying to navigate through Bari, or listen to Dr. van Schlinkenbuehls… By “Tightlips”

shrewdly proceeded to develop his own individual style of work which now includes even theatre musical scores. There has also been a revival of vocal romantic singing which reached its height with stars such as Pavarotti and Bocelli, following the outstanding worldwide success of the song Caruso, by Lucio Dalla. Italian light music comprises excellent singers and players whose style models are jazz-oriented, such as the piano player Paolo Conte, or inspired by the blues, as in the guitar music of Pino Daniele, or even based on ancient traditional music and folk songs, best seen in the violin music of Angelo Branduardi. Singer-songwriting has today embarked into new musical territory with figures of great talent and communicability. And we can definitely notice how vocalic Italians are by even hearing them speak, interact in the streets… and by having heard them last night at the Karaoke event :0))) CANTARE!!! Brought to you by Natalya “THE STEEL-TOED UKRAINIAN”

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A m a z i n g fa n ta s t i c c r a z y o r i g i n a l … a n d 2 c o o l f o r yo u B y

F i n n

“ F i n g e r s ”

The gods of EYP continue to test the brave bear-hunters of AFCO2… but they’re not scared, cause they’ve got guns, and bullets, lots of ‘em… yeh!! Firstly there was the room the committee got, which could be generously described as a dark depressing boxroom, kindly donated to the session by the US government testing a new design perfectly suited for breaking the spirits of Guantanamo Bay inmates. Another significant challenge for the group is the topic itself, being so vast and divisive, but the group is dealing with in true AFCO2 style… using buttspelling when more mundane communication fails them! Coraline (FR) is a very valuable resource to the group, having a unique insight into the Constitutional debate in France. Siegrid (NO) believes in creating a kind of teddy-bear constitution, that everyone can - in her words “ love and read and hug and love”! However, it is during the much needed breaks that these delegates really shine. Monika (CZ) had an interesting idea for a new method of completing the coin game when she asked “can you use your mouth?”, and was very keen indeed to see some “girl-on-girl” action! Ciarán “this isn’t what we signed up for” Gallagher (IE) must be running low on funds, as he decided to steal the coin during the game, after admitting having done the exact same in Irish nationals! Poor poor desperate dinosaur! More challenges arose at committee dinner that night, this time in edible form… or supposedly edible! The food at the dinner was also part of the same US government test for spirit-breaking products, and the restaurant staff must have been briefed not to compromise on this, despite Sara’s (IT) best efforts to negotiate us some real food! The test must have been a failure however, as the restaurant roared with laughter for the evening, culminating in the game “kiss the bunny”. No need for details here, let’s just say that some members of this committee will never be able to look at each other the same way again – Wallace (BE) knows exactly what I’m talking about! Well, lucky for me I don’t share a room with Wallace… unlike Ziggy (GE), Ciarán and Antti (FI)!

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When boring moments make you act stupidly Once upon a time in the Carrefour super-

for a trip with his best friends, Golden

the objective of finding his uncle who

market of Girona, in Spain, there was

Apple and Colgate Toothpaste. His par-

lived in Matera, quite close to Bari, to

Lady FAIRY vinegar. She was living in one

ents, who had never seen any more than

help him with his new job. His uncle was

set of shelves of the supermarket but she

the supermarket didn’t allow him to go

CALGONIT tablets. But they discovered

didn’t get on with her neighbours, FAIRY

because they thought that outside Little

that they relationship wasn’t really good,

lemon and grapefruit. One day, when she

FAIRY would disappear. Little FAIRY got

because all the time they were arguing

was crying next to the banana box in the

very angry and in a fit of nerves he killed

about how to work properly. Little FAIRY

fruit section, because she was feeling so

his parents. His parents were the latest of

preferred to hand wash all the stuff, and

lonely, she met one handsome guy, FAIRY

their promotion, so Little FAIRY, now “the

his uncle wanted to follow the capitalism


killer”, became the “anti-grease miracle”,

tendency, so use the dishwasher because

They automatically fell in love of

because he was the most powerful talking

he could clean more stuff in less time.

each other, and they began a secret love

about cleaning the embedded grease in

The fact was they couldn’t leave the ses-

affair. Their love was strong and they

pans and plates. So, he got very very rich.

sion, because all delegates put all their

decided made their love public and got

With the huge amount of money that he

trust in having all the stuff cleaned to use

married. The wedding was in the tissues

earned doing anti-grease soap action, he

it to taste the Italians fantastic dishes.

and napkins section, because she had the

decided to do a long trip to Bari. One time

So, they decided to call Little FAIRY’s

dream of wearing a white dress. After-

in Bari, he found the celebration of the

aunt, who was Mimosina and she lived in

wards, they began a new life together


EYP session. Because he was quite

Gravina. Aunt Mimosina was an effective

exclusively devoted to fighting grease. One

bored to be all time lying on the beach

fabric conditioner, and thanks to her in-

day, Lady FAIRY Antibacterial of Vinegar

sand and also he was passionate about

fluence she made the situation softer

had a baby more effective than their par-

his job, he decided to begin to work under

between uncle and nephew. All together,

ents. He was called Little FAIRY.

the orders of Lorna Burke and following

when all they were calmer, went to eat

Little FAIRY grew up really happy. He

the suggestions of Alessandra, the Head-

pistachios and were very happy cleaning

went to school, situated in the books and

Organizer. So he began to take the grease

the EYP plates.

magazines section. There he learnt that

of the EYP dinner service out.

there were more things to know and other

But Little FAIRY couldn’t do all the work

places to go. When he was four months

alone, so he asked the Journo’s team to

old, he asked his parents if he could go

put some posters around the town, with

Something sexist from THE BOX We all know Women = Time x Money And that Time = Money Therefore Women = Money² And we all know that money is the root of all Evil Money = √Evil So... Women = √Evil² Which mathematically proves that Women = Evil.

(note from Ed.) Wow. MICHAEL PIDGIN of IRELAND, If you’re that much of a chauvinist you shouldn’t have signed the note.

Carla The Heartbreaker

Easy Sudoku Not to be done in GA!!

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Order in the court! B y

E l l e n

“ C o u s i n

I t ”

AFET1 is at it again. They made it through team-building and now have swiftly moved on to the committee-room. Türgi eu’sse võtmine.The topic is well knownfor it’s comlexity and for some reason, all the people in AFET1 want to solve this problem. It wasn’t an easy task. There are a lot of different views, Layla and Ardi had some wonderful points during the discussion. Basically everyone participated actively. A blessing and a curse at the same time, but it sure made the out-coming resolution much more ……… Hubert had a sceptic point of view on the will of Turkish people at first, Simo believes more int the fact that if knowldege of something is wanted, the information will be sorted out on their own. Semih knows a lot of his country’s culture and the fact that he knows all the important dates by heart must of impressed everyone. Niclas also contributed a lot to the resolution – he was an all-time-forward-moving force. It was brilliant from Kostas to start playing „Honey, tell me that you love me!“. I think one of the most memorable things during committee work (exept from Cyprus of course!). Vlad, Semih and Simo prefered to approach guys with their love. They all had their techniques. Semih took his jacket off to be more convincing. Simo reveals that he had some rendez-vous with Niclas the night before. It was Caroline who made a crucial mistake by approaching Dave. No time to hesitate here and the belt comes off! The game had a strange impact on him it seems. Later on he was seen screaming like a girl with his feet all wet. Hubert tries to make Janet love him by referring to her as Maria. Nothing. Hubert, don’t you know that making a mistake with the girl’s name is a major no-no in any starting relationship?

„One down, only thirteen to go“

The King of Europe

In addition to the above mentioned people there’s also Halli. A wonderful girl who seems quiet at first, but if she tells you about her adventures in the karaoke bar on the way here, you’ll quickly come to the understanding that she’s funky and wild. Lucie, Vera and Janet suunasid ja muud the committee and did a grand job. And to tell the truth, Dave isn’t also only a prankster. He’s got the brains to do politics. The members of AFET1 are entirely splendid and unquestionably the coolest. It’s hard to say with 400 words why I hate journo-meetings that tear me away from this committee and why I feel happy to spend time with them. You’re simply the best and better than all the rest!

janet, halli, lucie and semih

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The committee on Foreign Affairs II is blessed! What else can one presume? In the morning of the 3rd day of committee work AFET II had an unexpected visitor: a real grey, full-feathered pigeon had invaded the committee room! Immediately, all windows went wide open but still the young, flying visitor seemed to enjoy our company and didn’t want to leave. The delegates started chasing the poor pigeon around the room until Fredrick (Chair, SW) finally grabbed it and let it out of the room to fly back to his pigeonbuddies. That incident was a sign, indeed: Gods are standing on their side! Even though the team had to change the initial structure of the discussion, spirits were high during the three days of committee work and mostly everyone seemed to be interested in the topic: first of all, the ground rules were set. The delegates had a lot of time to think and decide which rules they consider to be the most important ones and, eventually, they listed 10 of them. Just after that brainstorming took place. Many ideas were brought up, written in post-its and put on the windows. However, what all of them enjoyed the most was the coin game! It was strange, new, funny, exciting and quite easy, wasn’t it? Jagna (PL) and Eero(FI) started it, they knew exactly how to pass it through. Judging by the final result, it seemed that at least some delegates had played the coin game before, otherwise, guys, you wouldn’t have finished it so quickly, so easily and so harmlessly!! Il Barione was the restaurant where the delegates enjoyed their first committee dinner. As your respectful journo, though, i couldn’t have missed it! We sat at one of the big round tables of the restaurant, which also turned to be the EYP cafe. However, the first thing that draw our attention was, as you might has also noticed, that the restaurant’s tables weren’t ordinary ones: in the middle of the table there is that spinning-around-smaller-table, which actually proved to be very useful when the antipasti were served! Until we got used to the idea that half of the table moves regularly- sometimes even by its own will!- we bearsted into laughter while trying to pass the kimoni and the kimona! Always watch out for those moving knifes..! And then it was time for me to pay…When the committee realized that they would get Lornies if they passed me notes with gossips or other funny incidents, suddenly everyone remembered a looot of them and therefore, i had to reward them all! However, i have to stress out that telling me gossips about your friends is not the only, neither the best way to earn Loopy Lornies: make the fellow journos laugh and you’ll get the money!! Just as Michel(BE) did, by not revealing to me something he heard about a friend of his- he was rewarded for his honesty, hehe..just as Karen(IE), Mari-Liis(EE) and James(UK) did by making me see the world through a different point of view! Use your imagination and the last day of the session, at the auction, you’ll be able to buy EVERYTHING!!

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Four Frogs—sixteen eyes?!

T h a n k

g o d

e y p

T h e

i s

“ S t e e l

n o t

T o e d

a b o u t

m a t h e m a t i c s

U k r a i n i a n ”

EMPLOYMENT is definitely my favourite committee!!! That’s all I really want to say at this crucial and challenging moment, when the article is in Barion Hotel in someone else’s laptop and I have 10 minutes to write something again. “All that happens happens for better” – we say this in Ukraine when trying to be optimistic no matter what... :0) At least I can summarize the committee work in the most updated manner. Those three days flew away so quickly and sooooooo much work has been masterfully done by both the delegates and the chairs. Yet, I have the brightest impressions to be shared with you. First day of committee work was really memorable thanks to Kair’s very original way of introducing the delegates to the structure of their work, drawing some unimaginable parallels between cooperation and bread, group involvement and sausages, feeling of comfort and water...This strange guy managed in a not less strange way to make people love each other and stay respectful, attentive throughout the three days. I have to say that the anger management games helped a lot as well, as in the beginning people went crazy making those irritating sounds with their pens, click-clickclick... I was about to go crazy, too...But thank you, Kair! Now I can save money on my psychologist! Already in the end of Monday they had their brainstorming and partially grouping done. Second day was filled with passionate and intelligent (of course!) discussion of the range of things, such as intergration via education, salaries, protection of labour market and things like that...really impressing knowledge of all those things, in fact, the bigger half of the committee had printed out and draft booklets of the European Treaty and oh my God, those are smart people, they will go far in their lives! I was even more shocked the third day when I entered the room, flip-charts with little tiny letters all over the walls... and they were still writing more and more...talked about retirement, pensions, what not. When one of the orgas tried to invite Fabien for the Euroconcert rehearsal, he strongly refused: “No! I don’t want to!!!” he wanted to stay in and he DID! What a strong connection between people who just met five days ago! I don’t have time to say what wonderful things you’ve done for me, for money and just because you are nice people, like dancing, singing, what a charming and memorable committee dinner we had and so many other things, because everyone of the journos have left and they are waiting for me outside, I really need to run. But in case I don’t have a nother chance I want to tell you “THANK YOU!!!” I do love you!!! Ciao!

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w o u l d

P a g e

d o

a n y t h i n g

- L i n d a

f o r

“ J a i l b i r d ”

If you have seen people humiliating themselves in public lately, then it is 99.99% sure that they are doing it in order to get Lornies. Human abilities have no limits, and this has certainly proven it. So what have these crazy people been up to during last couple of days? As we all know, it started at the ‘20’s party’. The money was introduced and people danced like they were insane – all the borders were down. If that seemed crazy enough then, the real surprise was only to come. On Tuesday people went mad – two Greek guys chased Fredrick (Chair), forced him on the ground and gave him a kiss. The people around were amused, and Fredrick’s reaction was fine :”Yes, yes...”. Some Latvian guys reacted to this very quickly – they ran to a few people sitting near the stairs and lifted up one of the girls 20 times singing “Happy birthday to you”. The committee on Industry, Re search and Energy built a human pyramid,


l o r n i e s !

The Irish delegation took one of their green hats and went into the streets singing Irish national songs and asking for money.

which was quite impressive. During the luch break a delegate put pasta all over his face, and even posed happily for a few photos. # But this was nothing in comparison to what happened in the evening. During the EYP cafe one of the delegates literally ate a rose in front of our Godmother, earning quite a few Lornies.

A C R A Z Y N I G H T A T T H E B A R I O N H O T E L (desperate thoughts of an exausted journo and funny stuff from our lovely delegates) - By the Dark Lady Hello guys. As you all already know, EYP = non-sleeping. It’s crazy to waste your time in that way. There are 300 people to talk with, to laugh with, to flirt with. Here’s a brief report of the craziest and funniest ideas you had to spend your non-stop days, described through my particular Mafioso point of view. Ok. This is Bari. It’s 12.30 am and I’ve been working in the press room all day and dancing all night. Let me explain the situation: I’m exhausted. Oh, my God, I just want to go to bed and spend the rest of my life there. I would like to sleep a little bit but, of course, I can’t. Charlie (UK) is screaming “Hey Jude” 10cm from my poor little journo face. 12.45 I’m getting down from the bus (want to go to bed), I’m waiting for the elevator (still want to go to bed), I’m in the elevator (desperately want to go to bed). 12.50 I can see the door of my room… Come on, where’s the key? (rude words) Why is it always at the bottom of the bag? (still want to go to bed). 12.55 I’ve finally found the key. Go inside and have a hot, relaxing shower.. 1.15 What’s this noise? Let’s open the door and check. Some delegates are dancing all along the corridors. Why do they have so much energy? Am I becoming old? 1.20 I’m thirsty. Let’s go down and check if the lovely orgas have something for me. 1.25 I’m waiting for the elevator (I’m thirsty). 1.28 Still waiting for the elevator (and still thirsty). 1.29 Wonderful, the elevator has arrived. 1.30 I realize that I’m not alone. There’re at least six Norwegian delegates who’re going up and down just to meet new people. 1.31 Say hello to them with the smile you usually use while speaking with mad people. Where are the orgas? 1.35 I’ve finally found them(lucky orgas, they’re having a meeting from 3 to 5 am and they’re going to wake up at 6. (Life, it’s hard guys...) 1.40 Coming back to the fifth floor (and meet again the crazy Norwegians) and I’m finally wearing my pyjama. Everything is ready to go to bed. I realise I still have to write a 500 words article about the Italian culture. Shall I write it now? Nooooooooo…Good night guys, enjoy yourselves..

You all have done extremely well this far, but we are still waiting for your creative ideas to impress us even more – just remember TASTE IS KEY. Keep it decent ;) But remember, we know how much money we have printed! We are going to ensure that you have a wide variety of things to choose from in the auction – personal things of your chairs and organisers. If you have any suggestions though, you are most welcome to find a journo and tell him or her what you have thought of. The mafia will be waiting for you...

S o m e Wo r d s w o m e n u s e F i n n “ f i n g e r s ” n o n s e n s e g u i d e f e m a l e e y p

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FINE This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments. FIVE MINUTES This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade. NOTHING This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine" GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows!) This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine" GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows) This means, "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off. LOUD SIGH This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing" SOFT SIGH Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content. THAT'S OKAY This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay", means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow." GO AHEAD. At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble... PLEASE DO This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay" THANKS A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome. THANKS A LOT This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing"

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If you decide to climb up the stairs to reach the third floor of the committee work building, you are probably going to hear the lively debate of the Economics and Monetary Affairs committee from far away. The group, conscient of the precision of its subject concerning mainly the budget reforms of the european Common agriculture policy, got boosted from the beginning on by a lot of previous personnal researches. Soon after the first minutes during which Ullika gave hints related to all the working steps, the committee appeared already very lively. With the energic trio Philip (SWE) - Thibaut (BEL) - Enrico (IT), it was already obvious that the committee had taken its independance in organising their project. Using the EYP nice yellow stickers, the brainstorm brought to memory unsuspected themes such as the high moral standards and the custums problems. Zoran (MD) kept on the dialogue, drawing a wonderful threelegs horse symbolising Europe on a poster that the committee sticked on the wall of the committee room. Nina (CS) insisted on her point of view and realised that explaining is not always the easisest task… Zeynep (TR) then helped to note down the amount of words on the board, while Debby (NDL), Vladimir (CZ) and Coralie (BEL) were the two key elements to participate into redirecting the dialogue whenever needed. Indeed, discussing was sometimes difficult as everyone was answering loudly to the other creating a disturbing noise. José (PT) was always there to warn if a problem occured, be it in the formulating of the sentences or in the ordering of the phrases… The « magic bottle » to speak then changed the vision of the committee improving its efficiency a lot. Oskars (LAT), quite shy since the beginning, showed with a good joke that he liked the advantages of this system. The committee also enjoyed the « sing a song » rule reserved to the one who arrives late. Even Ullika had to go through it ! Furthermore, as time went by, it appeared more and more essential to have frequent coffee breaks ! But this did not make any prejudice to the resolutions as the EMA was the first to finish wrinting them. Quality added to efficency, what better qualities could a chair ask for ? The committee loved the games organised together by Ullika. Indeed The Big Buddy one had a big success but Nina had a difficult start …. Buddy 3 are you there ? It was nice to gather all together as a real group and to feel the wonderful ambiance of EYP surrounding. Now that I have the picture of Zoran’s drawing of Europe, I could easily stop my carriere as an EYP journo but it is so exciting to be with such a great committee that I wouldn’t drop my camera and my pen for anything in the world. Oh and one last thing : if the coffee breaks of the GA taste better than the ones you had until now, don’t worry it’s normal. It means you did a great job !

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Fact: this committee rules.

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Goal: spreading the word.

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Means: ENVI-protocol.

This is Big Sister reporting to her inhabitants. I have been watching you for a while now.. I’ve seen you evolving from 15 individuals to an extremely healthy group, with the right “environmentally friendly legislative attitude”. Even the most silent between you are not afraid to sow a question or to plant a comment. It’s the circle of life! So in order to communicate this to all other delegates, which is crucial to make the world better and healthier, I hereby suggest an ENVI-protocol with 12 rules to obey. (Because 12 is such a nice European Union number)

1. All girls and boys must increase their body temperature with at least 0.95°C when meeting a male of female delegate from ENVI,

2. All of you must use the words “more or less” at least twice in a sentence,

3. All of you must use the word “kaput” instead of “extinction”,

4. 5. 6. 7.

All of you will bear in mind that “it all comes down to living”, All of you will know the word “priority” in at least 8 different languages, All of you must acknowledge and admire the greatness of the ENVI chair Thomas (GR), All of you will have the beauty, kindness and warm friendly smiles of Monika (CZ), Lia (FR),

Nina (CH), Katarina (EE), Felipa (PT) and Heidi (EE),

8. All of you will have the efficiency, modesty and thoughtfulness of Khyle (UK), Stefan (AT), Albert (SP), Kristaps (LT), Lars (NO), Stamos (GR) Ruben (NL) and Fredrick (SW),

9. All of you shall from now on use “netherlandish” instead of “dutch”, 10.All of you shall not be jealous that I’m giving each and one of them 50 loopy Lornies because they have impressed me with their hard work, All of you who pollute life by not respecting this protocol shall not be taken into consideration during GA. You’re (filthy) air! Given that this protocol can only be approved by the European Youth Parliamentarians and thus not by the whole world, which is a tragedy, we could suggest a “body” or “lobby” for neypo’s (pronounced kneewhy-pose, non european youth parliamental organisations) that’d convince the rest of the world of the ENVIprotocol. I think it is pretty obvious.. This committee rules, I have spread the word, Etcetera, etcetera. Carole “Amaretto”

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«All you need is love », used to say the Beatles thirty years ago, and LIBE (also known as the love committee) has learned their lesson. While I’m here listening to their amazing discussions, I can concretely feel that love is in the air, and that these guys are really having fun together. Love is all around me.. they’re having lunch and dinner together, laughing , feeling, dancing, LIVING TOGETHER. I guess this experience will change their lives. Lorna and George’s training transformed a group of worried people in a perfect organic team, in which every component has found his own space and his own role.. that’s teambuilding, good work guys ! This kind of love atmosphere is deeply influencing LIBE’s work : the discussion process is relaxed but effective, conflicts are solved through polite mediation and cultural barriers are broken down by an efficient translation system. Jutta (GER),Thalia (CH) and Céline (FRA), in deed, are managing to translate almost every point of the discussion in French, in order to achieve a deeper understanding of the problem, using hundreds (but thousands is better) of pocket dictionaries. Do you want to have fun during coffee breaks ? First of all FEED THE BOX, and then join us.. George (CYP) uses to entertain this fellows with the saxophone (the perfomance of the Pink Panter was really amazing), while Helen (EST) makes them playing funny games, training also to teach her strange language(sorry Estonia,, I love you !). Yesterday evening, during our committe dinne, the guys were very hot.. even if Valtis(ICE) complained becouse of the lack o time for changing our clothes (and I definetly agree with her.. Come on orgas, girls want to look nice !), everybody was excited by the idea of tasting «le specialità greche » (for the translation, ask Cristina the organiser). After playing some funny gamas on the street, screaming as in the true italian tradition, and after making Dan(ROM)crazy with the pointing game(listen very carefully, Dan, I’m sure one day you’ll understand it !), we finally went to the restaurant, where I managed to know a little bit better my lovely delegates. While discovering that the sweetie Vanessa (AUS)can speak fluently five languages(and consequently feeling quite ignorant), I finally talked with Danielle (NED) , who told me about her national EYP session.. She didn’t want to attend it ! ! Ronghild (NOR) looked a little tired, probably still under the effects of Monday’s party. « Privet kak dela ? ».. I’ve also tried to learn some Russian frases, but, even if Stas (RUS) was a very patient teacher, my brain refused to remeber those kind of strange sound (sorry Russia !). Between tasting some enormous pitas and tzatziki (how can Greek people eat so much !), thaks to a firendly and relaxed Greek atmoshpere, Bulza (KOS) showed her great voice performing »Killing me softly ». Everyone was feeling like he was with old friends, smiling all the time and having fun. Guys were really crazy while coming back to the hotel.. they managed to stole Edward’s (UK) shoes, and he as forced to walk all along the bus without them, thinking that the driver got it (Jutta hid them in her bag !). IN JUST THREE WORD : I LOVE YOU GUYS ! ! (OK, four words..)

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Chancellor-designate Angela Merkel has high ambitions for the future "grand coalition" with her political rivals. Germany's two big parties - Mrs Merkel's conservative Christian Democrats (CDU) and the centre-left Social Democrats (SPD) - have approved a coalition agreement setting out the policies of the next government for four years. Mrs Merkel now looks assured of being elected chancellor in a parliamentary vote on 22 November. She claims the accord advances her party's key goals - overdue economic reforms and rebuilding the trust of the US and other countries. But the Social Democrats seem to have got the better of the deal, in the allocation of ministries and key policies areas. The SPD has the top jobs in eight ministries, including those of foreign affairs, finance and labour. The CDU and its partners from the Bavarian Christian Social Union (CSU) head six ministries, including defence and economic affairs. But the customary powers of the chancellor, to set or change the direction of government policies, will be much restricted in a "grand coalition". Instead, the comprehensive 143-page agreement sets out what the government can and cannot do. Any serious deviation could lead to its collapse, yet Germany's business leaders wanted Mrs Merkel to push through her radical reform agenda. She has had to scrap or water down most of it, as follows: • REVERSED: Plans to cut income tax rates for high and standard earners were abandoned. Instead top earners must pay a tax surcharge of 3% • SCRAPPED: Plans to extend the life of German nuclear power plants • SHELVED: Plans for more liberalisation of Germany's rigid employment laws, which experts say would help to get more people into work. In foreign policy the arguments have been more muted. Among the changes foreseen are: • An end to anti-Americanism; the agreement says Germany will not see itself as a counterweight to the US, but as a partner • A firmer commitment to the Nato alliance as well as the EU; the Schroeder government backed controversial plans with France, which some saw as a challenge to Nato • Fair and open dealings in Europe; Germany will be more mindful of the concerns of Poland and other EU states; the old Franco-German partnership will cease to be exclusive • Turkey: Germany sees Turkey's bid for EU membership as problematic and will go on pushing for a "privileged partnership" as an alternative.

‘Angela Merkel has struck a markedly different tone from Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder.

TERROR SUSPECTS ARRESTED IN ITALY Karlis “The Latvian-Blooded Swede” Three Algerians suspected of planning a terrorist attack have been arrested in Italy. The men were detained in Naples and Brescia, and were "potentially operative", police said. They had contacts with Algeria's Salafist movement, which is believed to have links to al-Qaeda, police added. Italy has acted against suspected Islamic extremists before, arresting an imam and five other men in June who were suspected of Salafist connections. The men were named as Yamine Bouhrama, Khaled Serai and Mohamed Larbi, reports Italian news agency Ansa, quoting Naples police. The Salafist Group for Preaching and Combat (GSPC) is the main armed Islamic organisation in Algeria. It reportedly wants to overthrow the Algerian government, create an Islamic state and attack Western interests in the region. Italy, which has a 3,000-strong military contingent in Iraq, has stepped up security following the 7 July London bombings. It has conducted several emergency drills in major cities to test it’s response to a terrorist attack.

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ITRE1—MORE ENERGY! Quel commité! Impressive, impressive, mumbles the casual onlooker, as he watches this committee power on through all topics energetic. Focussing their background knowledge and using all available resources (of whatever kind…) the committee has been trudging through the mountains of “combustible sludge” surrounding the one question that is all on our minds: How will I be able to watch the Simpsons in 30 years’ time?! Lluis (ES) gave a first answer: Buy Russia!! How exactly we would extract energy from Russia remains a mystery, but looking back at their country presentation, Russia has a LOT of hidden resources we could tap into if and when oil and gas run out. Hah! Mumbles the scientist: what will be in a hundred years? Ask the committee, they have widened their horizon to consider all energy problems up to the 31st century, far beyond the borders of imagination, mystery and technology. ITRE’s energy was always completely focused inwards – except on one noted occasion, when Aksels (LT) earned himself some Loopy Lornies by rolling around the committee… um… yessssssss…. Luckily, their chair lost his voice a few days ago, which has opened up room for everyone to let their opinions be known. And not only their opinions on the topic - amongst each other, the group has been moving steadily along the FIRO-Cycle and are coming ever closer to the ultimate goal: true OPENNESS! Honest and open feedback in the evenings, DJSAMming and – my heart grows to the size of a succulent steak – glimpses here and there of true caring between them are just some of the wonderful little fires they have lit amongst each other. Nevertheless, AnnaClara (SWE) will probably never be able to teach Jay (that is Jeroen (NL) – a name unpronounceable for foreigners…) how to pronounce the Swedish “i”. Espen (Norway) added some Norwegian words to everyone’s dictionary, which everyone memorized with great joy. But for Minna (Finland) the joy didn’t last very long, as the commitee decided to do some games, like the pointing game. Games like theese are everything but loved by the ones who can’t understand the point. Martin (Germany) and Andreas (Cyprus) are both engaged in the discussions, and almost manages to lure out some info and opinions from their beloved journo, as they are out of more ideas, but soon after they are back on track. As the CO2 level in the Committee Work room rises, the only way to avoid CW-room warming is by avoiding hot air, and there is very, very little hot air being emitted here!! After having created their own challenge in teambuilding, ENERGY is now creating their own challenging resolution – watch out for them, they will Syrtaki you!! This committee has a seemingly unlimited supply of energy, with these guys around, Europe should be safe for the next couple of decades! The Spy and Kris “The Fist”

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THE funky Droi vs journo evil B y

H a k a n

“ Q u i c k w i t ”

Director: Tara Actors: Rob Hanna Mona Jean-Baptiste Darina An-Sofie Greg Stella Chirag Iryna

A dark shadow appears by the door at the end of the third floor corridor. As the shadow slowly reaches for the door knob there is a short pause. “What’s that?” it thinks, hearing noises coming through the keyhole. The dark character is suddenly blown a couple of feet away by an explosion. As the door shatters into million of bits they don’t see the evil journalist recovering from the shock in a little corner behind a fire extinguisher. Since they are leaving their work area to have a little fun all together the evil journalist parks himself in the most official looking chair and starts taking photos of everything.(for documentation of course). The venue is being gradually evacuated for committee dinners whilst somewhere in the dark areas of the ground floor a top secret meeting is going on. All of the wicked journalists are hatching another of their nasty plans… (As usual) Further into the night what was observed by random Bari inhabitants was that groups of 3 0 youngsters dispersed into their favourite restaurants shouting: “Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny oops Johnny, oops Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny.” (or variations including Bella and Tommy) whilst looking like they were counting with their fingers! The cruel journalist had the feeling that something was very very wrong when people started doing this in groups of five all focusing on a person who was still trying to get the trick of it. Seeing that the DROI’s were all having so much fun, “This isn’t what we wanted” the journo said as his head headed(this is fun) in the direction of his lap. “Why?” he asked himself. “Why shouldn’t these guys be having fun? That’s what they are here for...” His facial expression changer from an evil grin to a smile as the realisation process took place in his head. The DROI’s were all enjoying themselves immensely, as usual really.

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After 3, a bit long hours and 44 speeches the FINPS came together in the committee room for the first time. Some admitted being a bit tired at the opening ceremony but they admired the ambassadors speeches despite the tiredness. There are 3 ambassadors in this great FINP committee and they are Thesis(CY), Theo(GR) and Ana. To shake things up a bit we played a little common game called fruitsalad/fruit basket. There where apples, strawberries and oranges. Nobody seemed to like oranges but everyone loved strawberries for some reason. When everyone were ready for some debates and hot discussions Kristine gave them 10 minutes to choose the 3-4 most important words of the question. When they had choosen 3 “combinations of words” they had a disagreement about the word strengthen being one of those words. Some thought that what else could they be doing then strengthening the EU? “It’s not like we want the EU to burn in Hell” Michaela(CZ) said. The 10 minuts given turned into 30 minutes, “We’ll call it a first day” Kristine said. After those 30 minutes some finphs were already asking for a coffee brake ! How embarrassing! Then came my personal favorate, Brain Storming....... It went all well and everyone participated with some interesting ideas but Finps are very talkative creatures and at one point it really bothered Kristine who wanted to fill out the paper, it worked. For technical reasons the journalists could not go to committee work on Tuesday morning so when I arrived after lunch they had done a lot. Kristine was not there but they still manage pretty fine. Not everybody liked committee work as well as other or so it seemed because Maria(RU) went out to buy some shoes. Because we are the Finps and other committees are jealous of us we where the only ones who could not choose a restaurant so we had to get the one available in the end. IN YOUR FACE, the food was great ! We went to a spanish restaurant with good music and a 7 course meal or so, for 10 euros only ! Kristine and Thea(NO) thought us a Norweigian drinking song which everybody have to learn, it makes them soooo proud ! People sitting on tables around probably thought we were weird because sentences like “It’s so big, I can’t even fit it into my mouth” and “Do I have to swallow?” were flying over the table. You can decide for yourself what they were discussing, it’s amazing to see what a Finp does for some money! Wednesday flew by with some serious discussions and resolution making. The Finps were happy and seemed to have solved the problems they had. After the toothpick eating during committee dinner Kristine spilled it out that her body is resistant to wood ??

“It’s not like we want the EU to go to Hell”

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Legal affairs committee went to a “Spanish restaurant” for the committee dinner. We were in the same restaurant as FIMPs. “La Taberna de Juan” pretended to surprise us transporting us to Spain. But I’m Spanish and I felt more in an Irish bar than in a Spanish restaurant. True that decoration of the walls had got bulls paintings, but the waiter didn’t know any word of Spanish, and the music wasn’t flamenco, the most famous music of Spain; and there were lost of GUINESS posters. At the same time, all the plates were made of plastic, and we got confused with the cola jar thinking there were sangria inside. All food was quite strange. This was because the food that they gave us was all except Spanish. First, they brought us some appetizer: chips, some bread, olives and some kind of nuts. After, we ate octopus arrabbiata, I suppose it was an Italian meal, because I can’t remember any Spanish recipe like this. The presence of the octopus in the table made noses frown of Mira (Austria), Sharon (Nederland) and Simon the boot Legger. All they are ANTIFISH! After, we ate some salad. Thanks god, because all days we have eaten pasta and pizza all time and the body asked us some green food. The main course was paella, of course. But it was mysterious paella. First of all paella is not spicy, but the cooker had the fantastic idea to put into it some Tabasco. Please try to don’t confuse Spanish and Mexican food!! Also paella hadn’t got mint and please, you can’t make paella putting in there carrots. You just need tomatoes, garlic, pepper and a few peas. The Taberna paella had got seashells too. But the better paella had got very big and red prawns, muscles, clams, king prawns and small lobsters.

The antifish group tried to obtain some meat paella, and they brought them chicken rice. But, PROBLEM! Mira is 100% vegetarian (because she doesn’t like the texture of meat and fish when is in her mouth), so after several attempts of get the vegetarian rice; the waiter gave to her an enormous salad with lots of different things. It had olives, mozzarella, artichokes, lettuce… and several non common vegetables. Also we ate cheese crêpes and drank Corona beer, a Mexican one. If you have read it, maybe you are thinking about the failure of the dinner, but it wasn’t. We had spent a wonderful time, laughing and trying to know more things about the others. We had discovered that Cécile (France) drinks beer, Mira (Austria) is vegetarian, Simon and Sharon (Nederland) are ANTIFISH, and Mira (Austria) and Matthias (Germany) are very good friends. Moreover, Nicholas (Greece) explained to us that he will study law in UK. And Alyaksyey (Belarus) explained us a hilarious anecdote. He proved the heavy problems some people have to distinguish the word FOCUS with the expression **** US! The lovely legallies brought to me, so to their journo, a beautiful white rose. So, it was a tender present, so I brought to them some Loopy Lornies. But the greed seized the group and they began to ask for more money. I explained to them that the Loopy Lornies were going to be brought to these people who surprise any journo. For that reason, The FIMPs and the Legallies began to sing the Zulu song in the middle of the Square!! After, other boys, like Danny (Ireland) try to continue surprising me singing lots of love songs [Pretty woman, for example], but they didn’t surprised me, maybe because they needed more passion. Carla The Heartbreaker

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I(nformative)T(echnical)R(especting)E(qual)2 =human pyramid With a view over a yard with a huge palm tree in it, we all gathered in the room that for the following days was to become the committee’s workplace. Nas arrived with the feared paper cloth and made the group to struggle with the “turn-the-sheet-over-game”. I followed them with great interest as I had never played the game and it really looked impossible to me. Nas stated though that it was very much possible, and that she had turned it over with 16 people even! So the group didn’t give up and came up with a method after a while. There wasn’t time to really try it out, so proof of their capability of really turning the sheet should come shortly. As hectic journo-life can be, I could just stay for a part of the brainstorming and ran off to the press-room in the afternoon, leaving the committee with loads of yellow post-its around them. In the evening I spotted the “researchers” at the gangsters’ party – dancing, cheering and having a great time. When I arrived at the venue next day, after lunch more precisely, the committee wanted to earn some Lornies. As a generous journo I am, I gave them the opportunity to get some money each one of them. So they headed out in the hall and surprised me (once again!) by building a human pyramid. Not only are they sportive, musical and party-loving, they are also acrobatic! During the second day of committee work a very nice and harmonic discussion atmosphere was forming, and their work was productive. Towards the end of the day they forced me to play the “pointing-game”, knowing that I had never got it. The torture just went on and on, me feeling more and more silly, trying in different ways to understand it without success. In the evening the historical moment finally arrived – me, and also Richard, got the game! Fantastic! We had very cosy committee dinner at an oriental restaurant, getting to know each other even better. I found out that many of them would like to study either law or economics, except Llaurenç who wants to do chemistry, and Rosie who wants to study physics. Chatting and enjoying lovely Italian starters I felt more and more like a member of “the family”. On the final day of committee work the real work-effort was to be made. Warming up with “fruit salad”, the group jumped on the huge resolution-writing-task and did some very good work. But you don’t have to be serious all the time - for some relaxation we all played “honey-please-tell-me-that-you-love-me”, and it was amazing to see that Tomas was impossible to make laughing. He stayed serious as a rock until the end! I am convinced that my committee will do a great job during General Assembly; they are very well balancing serious effort making with friendly fooling around. And of course - “We are energy itself”!

Karlis “The Latvian-blooded Swede”

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WEAREONOUROWNANDWEARETHEBEST! Here goes the sun, and committee work has begun… after all that fun in the two previous days it is time at last to get started with the real stuff! Delegates, dressed in their best clothes after the opening ceremony, are running up and down looking for their committee room. Chaos everywhere. And then silence. I go into the committee room of the glorious CULTs, where the brainstorming is on his peak point. Small papers hang all around the walls with stickers. The first impressions of the topic, according to each one of them, stand on them in addition to some more keywords important for the topic. Chair Bent makes a short introduction in order to introduce some tips for the way the CULTs can work and after that the engine goes on: productive discussion, fruitful debate, and lots of brilliant points written down. Issues are getting separated into categories, according to the general topic they are affected by. In the question of protecting national diversity causing a distortion of the principle of equal access to the market the delegates respond with four categories, which are the following: Culture, Economics, Language, Education. First to be set on the table is Culture. They are trying to make things a bit more clearly for the public by defining the cultural factors and standards that are relevant to the discussion. There is a break though: the Expert has come! His speech sounds quite interesting, but it includes many special terms and values hard to define and that makes it a bit difficult to understand. Anyway, his presentation doesn’t take very long and he leaves the room confident that all the valuable information he has given is noted down and will be used wisely during resolution writing process. The discussion about Culture goes on and a conclusion is about to come. This doesn’t take long, so next issue is to come on the table: Economics. Taking into consideration some of the basic values of Economics, provided by the economics students, the CULTs are trying to figure out the best way to handle all the financial aspects of their subject. But it has been quite a long time since committee work began, so the effects of tiredness are obvious. That is why they decide to have a short break. But after the break, the engines are on again and the 13 brilliant minds are shining again! A long and very productive debate begins and many new ideas are heard. Everyone has his own opinion to express. Economics is no more an issue to bother with as all available data have been analysed and reformed into clauses.

On the board now stands Language. However the committee is of the opinion that the outcome of the two previous discussions is more than enough to cover the fields of Language, so they decide to leave it aside for the moment. That is when Bent tries to make things a bit more understandable for everyone by explaining the famous cross of economics! Bearing in mind the new information gained by this little lecture delegates start to talk about education. Of course with their standard, extreme, hardworking and facilitated pace it is only a bit later that they gladly announce to chair Bent that they are finished with that task as well!

And what is next? An excellent committee dinner taking place in a beautiful pizzeria with candles, where we are served some drinks. We also have lot of chatting and more important, lot of fun. So, this is actually the pleasant and relaxing end of a very hard and tiring day. But the next morning is going to be even harder, because the resolution formation is to follow. That is why delegates must go rest and charge their batteries and be ready for what awaits them next…

Good luck guys and have fun! Orestis “The Dirty Bang”

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DEVE – dangerous, enthusiastic, valuable and energetic!!! B y

L i n d a

“ J a i l b i r d ”

It seems that the teambuilding was just the beginning of an action-packed week, because we are going to break the stereotype that committee work is less fun. And trust me – I have proof for this! First of all, on Monday we arrive to our wonderful committee room, which at least has indows and is big enough for all of us to fit in. So far, so good. Tim has a birthday ( happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you...!), and I have hidden sweets to hand them out later. Everybody is in a good mood, girls are chatting lively (Tim hasn’t arrived yet due to the reception). But a moment later the ambassadors and Michel arrives and we start writing down guidelines for the committee work. We have done only a few, when Michel manages to break one of the cupboard windows – glass splattered on the ground, everybody laughing. The atmosphere in the committee room gets only better. The time comes when we have to leave for the coffee break, which is supposed to last for 20 minutes. Unfortunately there is nobody 20 minutes later, 7 people after half an hour and then five more minutes later we are all there again. Luckily enough, that doesn’t happen again during the next two days. On the second day of committee work we have a marvellous quote again – “Let’s leave Africa by itself”. Sure, that is just one random sentence, because the committee is trying really hard to make poverty history. After all the long discussions I meet the committee sitting on the floor and giving a massage. We sing a song along with some movements suggested by Priya. And then we decide to go and disturb the committee next door – ITRE II. We just run into their room and scream at the top of our lungs. They seem quite surprised, but I am can tell you – we are the ones who win over them (the loud, loud voices of 14 girls and 2 boys). I have to admit that the committee dinner is going to be one of my favourite memories of the session. When our, Lorna’s and George’s committee arrive at the Greek restaurant, I feel that every-

body is going to have a good time. Sure, it takes us half an hour to order our food, but we do it!! And we definitely are a lot louder than the other committee sitting next to us. While waiting for the food, Emma sticks pieces of bread to Tim’s sweater, I take pictures, Michel complains of having lost his deo called “Magic men” ( now we know why he chose the adjective “magic”, don’t we?) and we get to know more things about each other. The decision to play brain teasers is taken, so we start with “One up, one down”, and continue with “I’m going to the moon”. It is an evening of lively talks and getting to know each other better. Moreover, after the EYP cafe DEVE is the only committee which walks to the bus singing their hymn. Last day of committee work is tiring, also because of the reason that some of us have caught a cold and don’t feel that well. However, the discussion goes amazingly well, everybody takes part in the process and contributes to the resolution. In the middle of the day we are attacked by Hakan, the journo of Tara’s committee. He sellotapes the door of our committee, so nobody can get out, although there is a try to cut it with a pen. Fortunately, the tape is cut in the end, and we are free again. But just wait, we will take revenge on this evil committee! So now the next committee article is going to be about the General Assembly, about your resolution and about yourselves. You told me wonderful quotes yesterday, and here is one from me to you, said by Oscar Wilde:” Life is too important to be taken seriously”! This session is going to end in a couple of days, and you have to start preparing for having PED (post EYP depression). One of the best ways how to get over it is thinking about the next session!

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R e l i g i o n , C u l t u r e a n d a h o s ta g e s i t u a t i o n M a r k

“ M a d

D o g ”

M c D a i d

- The French said ´Non´, the Dutch said ´Ni´, AFCO1, however, say ´Yass´

Having emerged as a fully fledged military unit from teambuilding, the Committee on Constitutional Affairs embedded themselves in the moral maze that is religion in present-day Europe. The room seemed fitting for the topic, having tall windows, pillars, archways and old stone walls it resembled a church (as if the organisers had planned it that way, but they would´nt be that smart, would they?). Wihout much time for reflection on the architecture, the committee were submereged in debate, clearly serious about the task at hand. Sorting out some points in the prelude to debate was first on the agenda, with a contentious definition of a ´Cultural Heritage´to be included in the preamble. The committee seemed to be aiming at the more liberal route to the topic as they continued with points asserting Europe´s multiculturalism while condemning fanatacism of any sort; a successful end to the opening. The ´sticky things´ came out the next day, as delegates posted their thoughts for discussion 'onto the freshly varnished floor. Informed contributions from everyone left the committee with much to discuss but they saw this as an opportunity for a good debate rather than a strain on time. Chair Klara led the team into the grouping stages, as Ben (UK) straddled the discussion points, playing ringmaster for the time being. They created 4 groups, as a strange man with a camera entered to film them

( Who was that guy?!) and proceeded to discuss these until lunch swooped them away on its cloud of nutrition. Such a smooth two days seemed almost unreal for the constitutional´s, yet any tranquility was immediately shattered with a haenous act of insanity: an unprovoked journo attack, tieing this fine example of humanity up and holding him hostage for doughnuts. This crime against humanity left all involved shocked and off-kelter as the debate disintegated into nonchalant tomfoolery, with Aria (CYP) mentioning that she ´sounded like an idiot´. The horrific act had obviously affected the group deeply. The team never lost its killer instinct however, as they played through a game of mafioso, where they managed to kill off the policeman first, leaving the gangsters to run riot. Perhaps Italy has gone to their heads? The final day of work left the committee with just phrasing to do, although they still used this time to have a discussion over national sovereignity within the constitution. Mara (GRE) led the debate with Nil (TR) following with the opposition as the other delegates spoke to keep the discussion on target. Debate such as this punctuated the three days spent toiling in that strange room, debate which this journo has no doubt has created a fantastic resolution.

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04:00 – You will find the nearest room and land on a vacant bed. Your eyes hurt. 04:12 – The person you landed on twitches in agony. You let the poor thing breathe and proceed to the bed next to it. 08:11 - Wakey-wakey! Try to understand where you are. Yes, it is a totally wrong person you harassed last night and you should probably apologize. Weren’t there supposed to be curtains in front of the windows?!? 08:13 - Bus leaving in 7 minutes. You jump out of bed and twirl around in the room. Reassure the suspicious glances by saying it’s your national rain-dance. 08:13:13 - Why are you wearing someone else’s underwear? God only knows. 08:16 - You find „I LOVE PUERTO RICO“ written all over your stuff with a waterproof black marker. Jolly good! 08:17 - You realize that there’s 3 minutes until the bus leaves so you take action inyour own hands. You attack your room-mate under the shower and make him wash his hair next door. 08:17:55 - You fall asleep in the newly conquered shower. 08:23 - You find yourself next to the toilet and the shower, soaked. You put on your (dirty and 4 times worn) socks and jump out of an emergency exit on the third floor. The sky is blue, though. 08:36 – You wake up on a patch of grass next to the hotel. Wrong hotel. Start running towards Hotel Barion. 08:48 - You find everyone still waiting for the bus to leave. Discover the huge miscalculation with wearing only socks. Oh, well. Have a nice day!

Our artists impression of Marco if he was stretched and baked in the oven at 200º C for 30 - 35 minutes. Only kidding! At least 220º C.

MORE CUTTHROAT THANKS We would like to commend all the family businesses below for contributing to this Gangster™ production. In addition, the following mobsters must be saluted - the Pressroom Mafia for the blood, sweat and tears from their various victims, Seba “The Hair” Loukas, Marco if he actually exists, doughnuts and other refreshments provided by the rival “Orga” team and the incorrigible spirit of ‘The Family’.

This project has been carried out with the support of the European Community in the framework of the Socrates Programme.

La Baritone - Issue 2  

Sri Lankan’s Go To The Polls By Karlis the Latvian Blooded Swede Reported by Mark “Mad Dog” McDaid More World News 2 certain other constitut...

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