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EYDIS “Goddess of the Island” and “Giver of Good Fortune and Gifts” An intuitive and imaginative woman who breathes charm, femininity and sensitivity. She embraces the concept of living her dreams and aspires to leave the world a better place. eydismedia.com

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Beautiful You Although the Butterflies life is short, it is an amazing transformation of what we all experience in our lifetime. Life presents many choices. It is our choice to be as strong, or not, as we chose to be. It all starts with an egg, and inside a tiny caterpillar. As the caterpillar begins to grow she becomes very hungry and begins to bite through the milky weed that surrounds her. Because this substance has a glue-like feel, a number of caterpillars often don’t make it through this stage, as their mouths are glued shut in the process. The ones that fight and survive break through the skin and triumph. A striking combination of colors begins to blossom. The caterpillar then grows bigger and more vibrant. Tentacles begin to grow and as she continues, tiny little feet appear. As the caterpillar grows, she feels strong as she moves quickly in search of a place to spin her silk for the next part of her journey. In finding that perfect place, while connected to a leaf, hanging upside down and without falling, this amazing creature wiggles to free herself from her old skin. Through this difficult process, she never gives up. The transformation of shedding her old life has now begun.

“Just when the caterpillar thought it’s life was over, it showed great faith, trust and strength, and became a butterfly.” Maria Savoy

Safe within her cocoon, she is protected to grow and is disguised from all predators. Without knowing where she is going, and with complete and utter trust, she is allowing her transformation. It is within weeks that she will emerge with wings to fly. This amazing butterfly, completely shedding what does not serve her, now flies into this beautiful new world, one that she has only seen in her dreams. She made it, total freedom. This is the story of all of us. We are born of this world into so many possibilities. There are times along the way we develop a glue-like substance that prevents us from speaking our truth. Along the journey, we strive to find the strength to break out of old patterns and old habits, daring to find that light in the world. Life experiences can be difficult, but with complete and utter trust in one’s self and one’s source, we can and will emerge stronger and brighter than ever before. Do not fear the journey, it is meant to teach both you and others. Stand strong in who you are, know that you are of the most high and that you are being guided. Trust, believe in yourself, find your way and know that if God put a dream in your heart, he will be right there to see it through.

Maria Savoy – Publisher maria@eydismedia.com 10 | Eydis Magazine

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Cover photography by Philicia Endelman 12 | Eydis Magazine

August 2016 Simply Spiritual The Dream Experts Tell Us Your Dream 62

Eydis Living Talk to Tamara Relationship Expert August is American Artist Appreciation Month Elvis Lives! Do You?

To Judge or Not To Be Judged


Suffering is Optional Get Back to Happy






Dear Liberty Missing an Estranged Son Connecting You With You Being Willing & Committed to Live Your More Multi-Dimensional Children In Our One-Dimensional World


Wealth Consciousness Don’t Be An ATM Parent



Five Tips to Giving and Getting Support Make a Better World 56


Healthy Living My Evil Twin


Use Plant-Based Eating to Break the Diet Cycle


Life’s Deadheads


Three Ways To Improve Your Health Immediately 98 Oodles of Zoodles 100

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Photo by Philicia Endelman

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by Maria Savoy


hen you think about making a contribution to the world, many of us think of it as, giving money to a charity or fundraiser, contributing funds to your church, or doing volunteer work at your local nursing home, and that would be true. There are many ways to make a difference in this beautiful world. However making your life’s mission and work a way of contribution to millions is what Valerie Sheppard is committed to doing. Valerie Sheppard is a personal transformation expert sharing wisdom as a speaker, author, coach and university lecturer. She has a diverse background, including business strategy and marketing, creative and performing arts, event planning/production, and personal/professional development. She started her more than 30-year marketing career working in causerelated marketing, helping non-profits strengthen

communication and grow their memberships. After working to get her honors MBA, she worked with powerhouses such as Procter & Gamble and Sergio Zyman, was a Vice President of the 2.5 billion dollar Grocery Division of ConAgra Foods, and was certified professionally qualified to teach in collegiate schools of business by the AACSB. Valerie’s passionate about helping people reach their full potential. She is a certified Sacred Contracts coach and has been trained in compassionate communication, spiritual direction and HeartMath. She has coached young girls, mentored homeless women, and taught in corporate universities and collegiate schools of business. Valerie has been able to help people from all walks of life overcome obstacles to achieve success. She believes in life-long learning and living authentically, which she accomplishes through ongoing

exploration in spirituality, human achievement, personality dynamics, and communication.

GROWING UP VALERIE Originally from Virginia, Valerie grew up in a military family. Her father was a Marine and her mother, a civilian working for the Department of Defense; Valerie lived a life of high discipline.

In grade school, her teachers scolded her for being very talkative, even calling her a bit bossy. “I wish I could have told them then what I know now,” Valerie smiles. “Bossy in grade school could mean a visionary leader later in life. Establishing direction is one thing leaders do, so it might be a good idea to re-evaluate labeling a young girl’s behavior as “bossy.” Being a very artistic child, Valerie was performing by the time she was 3 years old, dancing ballet on the Claire eydismedia.com 15

although she portrayed herself as optimistic and comfortable, Valerie felt the cards were stacked against her. The words she was taught as a child, would replay over and over again in her mind, that ‘Black people have to work twice as hard to have half as much.’ She even remembers a male counterpart telling her that also being a woman, made her a “double negative.”


and CoCo Show. In high school, she acted in lead roles and was also doing some Television, which grew to include independent short films, commercials, and voiceover work. “Something I didn’t know I was doing then, but in retrospect realize it now, is that I was being a messenger. It seems like everything I have done has contributed to that aspect of what I am doing today,” Valerie shares.


Being a cheerleader, captain of the track team, and playing for all-star soccer teams, Valerie was active and visible. But she often felt like she was clawing for every bit of recognition in an attempt to

stand out in a positive way. Always comparing herself to others, she never felt like she measured up. In high school, her family was 1 of only 3 Black families living in her neighborhood, walking distance from her school. She felt like it was hard to create friendships with the Black children who came from further away. Valerie explains, “I felt I didn’t fit in with the Black students and I didn’t fit in with the White students so I felt very isolated and alone. Some Black students even called me “Oreo,” black on the outside, white on the inside.” The struggles of not fitting in followed her into her corporate years. Many times,

Taking a look at honest feelings about situations in life is not always easy. “What I have learned,” Valerie shares “is that some of the aspects of what was going on with me growing up were related to my own inner feelings of inadequacy. There was an inner subconscious me that wasn’t really that thrilled about being Black. I didn’t dislike Black people,” she continues, “but the 1960’s, 70’s and 80’s race-centered experiences I had were often scary, and in some cases, dangerous. I couldn’t really talk about them for fear I’d get labeled hyper-sensitive and angry Black woman. I think I built up resentment in my heart at my feelings of not being enough when measured by the color of my skin. I sometimes wondered what my life would have been like if I’d

been born White. Looking deeply at myself back then, I think being super articulate, striving to excel at everything, needing to fit it at all costs, were my attempts to be judged as ‘as good as White’ so I could have a better life.” These and other realizations of sub-conscious selfjudgments that Valerie has unraveled and healed are the reason the centerpiece of her work with others is developing self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love.


One of Valerie’s passions is acting and she’s good at it. She had a recurring role as “Mail Carrier Carla” in the Emmy-nominated Hip Hop Harry on the Discovery Kids Channel. She was the voice of the Cat on “The Wheels on the Bus,” and has interviewed people at many events as a live correspondent. She was a regular cast member in the multi-award-winning OC-based ImprovCity, which is very fitting for her, as laughing is one of her favorite things to do.

with no script. It’s all very exciting! Most people don’t realize what acting really is. They think it’s pretending to be someone else. It’s way deeper than that. An actor has to become the character, which means to release their own identity and physicality to be able to think, feel and act as the other. That means going deep inside to pull up the emotional resonance to bring with the words in the script to life. I love it.”


Valerie has a passion for personal development. What she has discovered is that there is an aspect in every one of us that is calling us

to just what we need next to grow and evolve as beings. We need only hear and respond to that call. “Some have it so powerfully that they can’t ignore it, and others have to get out of their heads and quiet their mind chatter to allow it through,” she explains. “But we all have it. We often have to awaken to our own creative and intuitive abilities to get the full message. The intellect is not always our friend!” Her ability to do just that: quiet her mind and tap into her intuitive voice, has helped Valerie become very comfortable seeing the unseen and hearing the unspoken.

Valerie Sheppard with Hall of Famer, Mitch “The Rock” Richmond.

“My favorite place to be, besides the beach, is on a set. The pace, the creativity, regrouping as scripts are being rewritten in the moment; or in the case of improv, creating a whole environment and relationships on the fly eydismedia.com 17

her “Uh-oh, here we go” reaction. After working with me for a few months, she knows, I will hear a whole constellation of hidden meaning behind what she says that’s signaling to me that we need to engage there. When we do, I can guide her deeper into something that is about to pop open, some wound that needs forgiveness, or some limiting or false belief that is playing out negatively in her life. I always say you can’t change what you are unwilling to look at, and I’m grateful my clients and students trust me to shepherd them to their higher ground!” Valerie explains.

As a coach, it allows her to hear below the surface of her clients’ stories to uncover the real issues in many situations. “Yesterday, I was starting a session with a client and 18 | Eydis Magazine

as she started sharing her latest life adventure, I heard something in the way she characterized the situation and said, “Hold on just a minute, what was that you just said?” I could feel

The strongest counseling tool Valerie uses is her heart. She can literally feel her way with clients. She calls this her “ears not necessary” listening, through which she receives perspective about situations from the sense of expansion or contraction she feels in her heart. Expansion is positive, contraction is negative. “The heart is actually our most powerful guidance system, and when we get practiced at discerning the messages, we can live a higher vibration overall experience,” says Valerie. She uses her heart to figure out how she can help them heal their hearts and reach their full potential.

“My favorite moments in coaching come when I feel clients and students connect to what I’m sharing. It’s always so amazing when they get really quiet, and I actually can see their realization that what I just said is on target. There’s this opening that happens where they can expand into a truer version of themselves.” Valerie loves working with young adults and feels that she can really go deep into the spiritual teachings to help them create a vision for themselves and what they can contribute to the world. She feels very blessed to be able to work on the University of California, Irvine campus, where she’s moving into the second year of teaching her spiritually-based life mastery curriculum called Living 101: Being Happy and Whole. Valerie believes that college shouldn’t just be about getting a degree, but that young people need co-curricular programs that teach them about who they are and how to be in the world.

making lots of money, having a family, or retiring. There were happy moments in between of course, but there was also still plenty of struggle and striving. What she has found is that although that conditioning is still pretty prominent, young people today don’t want to build their lives that way. They want immediate and ongoing happiness and they want to make it a more prominent part of the whole journey through life.


Valerie believes that our lives are speaking to us through pivotal moments and how well we listen and respond determines the outcomes. One of her most significant moments came about 10 years ago. She had reached the pinnacle of her career and

on the outside, it appeared she had everything. So why didn’t she feel happy? Why was it all so unfulfilling? During a meeting with her team at work, she started having symptoms that made her think she was having a heart attack. She was later diagnosed with a benign super Arrhythmia, meaning although her heart was behaving abnormally and it was a serious problem, cardiologists could not find a physiological cause. “That was when I really began to question what my life was all about. How could this be my life? I’m successful, but also stressed, angry, and I’m sick of struggling. How is it that I’ve reached the pinnacle of my career and I’m feeling so unfulfilled and unhappy?” Valerie remembers asking herself.

In Valerie’s new book “Living Happy to Be ME!,” she talks about being conditioned to accept “deferred happiness.” How past generations lived in a state of, ‘we’ll be happy someday after we achieve something first. So happiness happened as the result of having a successful career, eydismedia.com 19

In her journey to understand her predicament, Valerie learned so much about herself and how she was running her life. One important piece was that she had been compartmentalizing her life, and living as a somewhat different person in each one. In one compartment, she was a daughter, in another a friend and yet another a businesswoman. She wasn’t integrating all of herself in any of them, which is why she felt fragmented. She now refers to this as dis-integrating. “We have to be all of who we are in every aspect of our lives. When we integrate our whole selves, especially our spiritual essence, into everything we do, life is very different,” she explained. Now fast forward to 2015 when Valerie experienced yet another pivotal moment. She was facilitating an all-day leadership workshop, when in the middle of it, she had a catastrophic hemorrhagic stroke, sending her back to the same hospital emergency room where she was 10 years prior. “Again, it was a scary yet powerful experience with a message. But this time, it wasn’t about a new learning about myself, but rather an opportunity to go deeper into embodying the spiritual me. It’s my call to unequivocally BE, that which I teach, to embody the wisdom.” 20 | Eydis Magazine

to be resolved. She talks about the inner exploration she did on her radical sabbatical from her previous life, and how she has gained clarity, healing, forgiveness and resolution that enabled her to “spiral up” in her Consciousness, and feel more happy and free-spirited - no matter what else is going on.

THE INSPIRATION BEHIND “LIVING HAPPY TO BE ME!: DANCING YOUR SOUL LIGHTSTYLE© Being diagnosed with a serious physical problem that could not be traced to a physiological cause made Valerie re-evaluate her life, who she was being in that life and how that was contributing to her situation.

“What was so troubling with my heart that caused it to react that way?” She pondered. She candidly shares a lot of her personal life story in her new book. “It’s really not about the ups and downs as much as what I discovered was underlying them.” It became clear to her that the heart trouble was a symptom of a deeper issue that needed

Little by little she kept track of what tools and practices had the deepest and most lasting impact. Eventually, she saw some common themes and decided to write about them to help others struggling to find lasting happiness and peace in their lives. That is how “Living Happy to Be ME! was born. “Living Happy To Be ME!”, teaches a four-step process for personal transformation. It’s not about just learning the steps and you’re done; it’s really a lifestyle change, which Valerie changed to lightstyle to mean being the lighter version of you. Dancing Your Soul Lightstyle is all about shedding the weight of your false self so that you can soar. “Writing this book for me is about giving back and asking the question how can I support others on their own journey of transformation. I really love how this book turned out, she continues, and I want to get it in as many

hands as possible. I feel there are many hearts hurting out there and they don’t have a place to turn.” To purchase Valerie’s book on Amazon go to http://tinyurl. com/LivingHTBM


I grew up my whole life believing I was walking my talk, but here’s the thing: too much of the talk was coming from the false self. I may have been in integrity - doing what I said I was going to do - but what I know now is that authenticity is a higher and deeper spiritual principle than that. One can be in integrity and out of authenticity.

acceptance of who you are coming to you from you. You experience yourself being full of compassion and forgiveness for yourself and others. You feel a peacefulness and happiness inside even when you’re amidst chaos and pain outside. You feel connected to everything and everyone and looking for the best in every situation. You give and receive love Connect with Valerie: HappytoBeME.net Valerie@HappytoBeME.net

Valerie facilitates a group experience called the Happy and Whole Connection Circle that meets on Wednesdays at 7pm Pacific online. She opens with a meditation, teaches for about 20 mins and then opens the lines for those who want to participate in what Valerie calls a heart-toheart. If you would like to be involved, learn more at http:// happytobeme.net/be-happyand-whole/

What I mean by that, is your authentic self is the spiritual essence of you that is not covered up by the negative patterns of conditioning that you took on as a child and grew up believing. That’s the ME that’s in the book’s title. The Magnificence Essence of you is this true, Divine aspect of you that is also in everyone. It’s the peace, love, joy and freedom that is the deepest, truest you. So how do you know when you are living your most authentic life? When you are being your authentic self, you feel an expansion and fullness at the heart level. There’s total eydismedia.com 21

Eydis Living

Talk to Tamara Tamara, the relationship whisperer, is like a walking instruction manual for all of your love, dating. and relationship questions. Ask her your burning questions and she’ll guide you in the direction that is right for you. To ask your questions go to eydismedia.com’s home page and click on Tamara’s picture, under our “Let’s Talk” section.

by Tamara Green

“Make peace with you and your life’s circumstances.” Tamara J. Green, LCSW

Dear Tamara Being single again after a 22-year marriage is sometimes leaving me with the feeling of emptiness. This feeling usually shows up on weekends when I don’t have any social plans. And, if I’m being very honest, I certainly felt times of emptiness during my failing marriage. I’m already in therapy, but what I’d love from you are some simple tips on how to get myself through an occasional evening of feeling this way. Signed: Sometimes Alone & Empty 24 | Eydis Magazine

Dear Sometimes Alone and Empty, I’m glad to hear that you are in therapy to help you get through the emotional roller coaster of divorce. That’s a good thing! To help you through your occasional feelings of emptiness, I suggest that you try these simple, even fun, ideas for a great release: •

Ask yourself this awareness question, but do not answer it: “What unawareness am I using to create the feeling of emptiness that I am choosing?” Keep asking yourself this powerful question until your mood lifts and you sense a release. Feelings are just feelings. It’s when you attach meaning to them that judgment is made. For example, you might be saying to yourself (subconsciously) “I feel empty, therefore I’m not lovable.” Is that even close to being true? Absolutely not! In fact, your judgments are just interesting points

of view, nothing more. By repeatedly asking yourself the awareness question, you’ll release the judgment and feel better in no time. •

Acknowledge your feeling by saying out loud, “I feel empty.” Sometimes, just by naming your feeling, a release begins to happen. Then, like a very dramatic actor from a bad B-movie, act out and exaggerate your feelings of emptiness. Use your whole body by getting down on your knees and throwing your hands up in the air, looking upward and yelling, “God, why me? I feel so, so, so empty! Why me?!” If you’re not laughing yet, then get louder, sillier, and even more exaggerated. I love

this exercise because it gets you to lighten up quickly and helps you to stop taking everything so seriously. Go ahead and have fun with this exercise. I promise that it’ll lift your spirits. Tamara Want free relationship advice right away? Take advantage of Tamara’s free 45-minute guidance session where you will finally get clarity and relief from your dating or relationship struggles. Whether you are single or are experiencing relationship upset, by clicking here, you no longer have to figure this out alone anymore. Yay!

Elle Magazine dubs Tamara Green, LCSW “The Soul-centered Love Expert.” She is an author, speaker and trainer, helping thousands of people to navigate the waters of love, dating and relationships – all while falling madly in love with themselves in the process. Trained as a Love Mentor® by Dr. Diana Kirschner, Individual and Couples Psychotherapist, Meditation Practitioner and Hypnotherapist, Tamara’s coaching is highly effective as she combines her many years of professional training with her gifts as an energy healer, intuitive and seer. As a result, Tamara creates an exciting catalyst for deep emotional healing, giving her clients greater success in life and love. She has devoted her life to helping women rise out of pain and fear so they can finally experience the long lasting and loving relationship of their dreams. As well as working 1-on-1, Tamara offers free weekly meditation audios that take you on a journey of love with ease and joy. Join Tamara’s community at tamaragreen.me; Facebook facebook.com TGreenLoveExpert; youtube: youtube.com/channel/UC9MqTnZEJYNEpKnwrjsZ40A eydismedia.com 25


by Mella Barnes


ugust is American Artist Appreciation Month. It’s a time to celebrate, explore, and appreciate art that is being created right in your hometown. As a musician, I’m going to focus on that aspect of art, but you can apply these same tips to any type of art you know and love! So, how can you show support for your local artists? There are many ways that vary in time, effort, and money, but you don’t have to do them all! Choose whatever you feel most comfortable doing and know that you’re making a huge difference to that artist and their craft.


of supporting your local music artists is by checking your local venues. You don’t have to know the artist to drop by, and sometimes it’s more fun if you don’t! Look through the photos and choose one that looks the most interesting, or pick the name you like most. If you’re still unsure, close your eyes and point. Whichever one you point to is the winner for the evening. If this seems like a small thing and you feel like you aren’t contributing, please trust me that this is a big deal to artists! The more people we have in the room, the better, and your presence is valued and appreciated. The same goes for an artist with a gallery opening. You might have seen the story in the news about the grandma who had an art showing and no one came. Thankfully the story had a happy ending and she got a lot of attention from it, but this happens far more often than people realize. Having people show up validates our efforts and we really appreciate every single person who takes the time to come out. As a bonus, it’s often free or cheap, so it’s a fun night out for next to nothing!

INTERACT You can just come to the show and

leave when it’s over, and that alone will be enough. If you want to do more, you can talk to the artists after the show. Most local artists are more than willing to mingle with people after a show, so please introduce yourself! Tell them what you liked most or what spoke eydismedia.com 27

them I like their work seems like a nightmare. Thanks to the internet, there are many other ways to interact with your local artists:


to you. It is so valuable to us. Years ago I dragged myself onstage, and I really didn’t want to perform. I am a studio session singer so performing in front of crowds is terrifying to me. I was nervous and awkward, stumbled through my explanation of why I wrote the song, sang it while staring straight into the back of the wall, and slunk back to my seat. A man approached me after the show and told me his brother had just died, and hearing my song made him smile for the first time in weeks. I still think about that story today, and it made such a difference to me. It gave me a reason to try again, and also made me thankful that I gave it a shot. Please don’t think your words have no meaning to us; I promise you they do! If interacting in person seems daunting, I totally understand. I’m an introvert, so the idea of approaching someone just to tell 28 | Eydis Magazine

artists are active on social media because people need to know about them in order to support their work. A lot of work goes into maintaining a social media presence, and interacting with artists can really show your appreciation. Simply following them on Twitter or Facebook is fine, but leaving a comment is even better. Artists often deal with internet trolls and negative people who actively try to bring them down. Your positive, uplifting comments can make their day. If social media isn’t your thing, you can also send an email letting them know you appreciate their work. Snail mail also works; I once got a card mailed to a venue I played at, and they sent it to my home. It was such a surprise and so nice to know that someone enjoyed my work enough to take the time to write. It’s important to mention that artists may not always get back to you. Depending on how many emails they receive and how actively they check, they may not have time to respond. I don’t even read comments on my YouTube channel because I just don’t want to deal with negativity, so if anyone ever left me something nice there

I wouldn’t know about it. But your words do make a huge difference and we definitely appreciate them.

BUY MERCHANDISE Most local musicians will have a table or booth to sell items and talk to people. Many venues don’t pay the artists at all, so artists will play for little or no money in exchange for exposure and the chance to sell items after they perform. You don’t have to buy anything from them, but if you have the extra cash and enjoyed the work it wouldn’t hurt to show your support in that way. Most artists spend their own money funding their craft. Artists have to buy their own paint, canvases, and

tools. Musicians have to buy their equipment, pay their producers/mixers/musicians, and nowadays most of us have to pay to maintain a working website. Your financial support helps to offset the cost and, of course, boosts morale as well. Kickstarter and Patreon are also ways to support artists financially. These are websites that allow you to contribute money to an artist’s project in exchange for rewards they create. For example, you may choose to donate $10 and receive the album when it is finished, or $20 and receive the album plus a thank-you in the album notes. Sometimes an artist cannot continue to create

without financial support, so any little bit will help fuel their creative passions.


a writer for a local paper? Do you work in advertising? Do you know someone who might be able to use the artist’s services? Do you have family or friends who might be fans of the artist? Please let us know! Of course, you aren’t obligated to do any of this and you shouldn’t feel like you have to offer, but if you enjoy the artist’s work and think you could help it is always much appreciated. This one definitely requires the most work out of the list of options, but it can help the artist in more ways than one.

If you are able to do even one of these for a local artist this month, I guarantee you’ll make a difference! Helping others is a great way to feel better about yourself too, and you might turn that artist into a lifelong friend. Have an amazing August and enjoy some art. Mella is a session singer, songwriter and producer living in Nashville Tennessee. Also an animal lover, she has three dogs, a rabbit, and any number of foster animals in various shapes and sizes. She is the author of Way Less Cowbell, a book on communicating with session musicians. If you would like more information or to hire her onto your project, please visit www.mellamusic.com

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30 | Eydis Magazine


Your Heart by Elaine M. Grohman


oom-boom, boomboom, boom-boom. Precious echoes carry rhythmic vibrations through the caverns of life. A melody is carried through these percussive vibrations, signaling a call to action to each relevant building block. One by one each resonates to its one perfect specialty, answering the call to join the miraculous synergistic, celebratory dance. Life begins.

There was a time, in your own pre-history, when your own microscopic cells listened to the beat of your mother’s heart, unquestioningly trusting this sacred sound. Each beat brought comfort, each beat brought growth, and each beat urged the precise cells to coalesce, in their perfect placement, in their perfect size, and to unquestioningly work together as one while every beat brought you closer to your life that was about to unfold. After birth, we instinctively seek comfort in loving arms, still following the sonar of our mother’s heartbeat. We lay our head on her chest seeking the familiar boom, boom, boom, that told us all was well, washing

away pain, fear, and confusion. Time distorts our perception and we believe that we could be permanently separated by distance and time, and this perceived separation from our original sonic chamber widens the distance that we falsely believe separates our lives into individual moving parts.

Still, deep within our body, protected by flesh and bone, our own heartbeat does not stop entraining each cell within us, reminding each cell that they are part of one body. If we forget this fact, we feel isolated and alone. If we live knowing this truth, our life can help us remain open and resilient to all that may come our way. It is time for us to remember how to listen to our hearts. Our own hearts carry the same signal as in our first days of life, reminding the body, and all of its perfect parts, that each and every one is necessary for a healthy and happy life as one individuation of humanity. We must learn to listen to the heart’s call so that we can come together as one human symphony, whose collective beat begins to follow the

rhythm set in place millenniums ago, echoing though the cosmos long before we knew that life existed at all. We must find our rhythms once again so we can become tuned to the greater songs that life has yet to unfold before us. We are in the incubation time once again. As we learn to come together to be one healthy whole, we will see life anew. If not, as with life, when harmony is not gained and systems are unable to sustain life, a spontaneous miscarriage will occur and life as we know it will cease to be. But if we collectively close our eyes, trusting and remembering the vibrations of life that we heard so long ago? Perhaps we can be born again, new and fresh, as joyful new inhabitants who recall that life’s rhythm is indeed our own and within us.

Elaine Grohman is a speaker, author, energy healer and angel reader. She has a private practice in Farmington, MI. For appointments please contact Lainie Rubio at 248.320.6532 or visit her website at www.elainegrohman.com

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C.H.A.N.G.E. Creating Hope and Awareness and Nurturing Growth through Empowerment The St. Clair Butterfly Foundation was founded to inspire a movement of C.H.A.N.G.E. by providing all children and youths with the tools to overcome any adversity and help them to realize their full potential to soar! Based in Oakland County Michigan, this nonprofit organization offers: Community Outreach Programs Creative Art Programs Scholarship Programs Legislative Initiatives Your donation goes directly to helping kids find their voice The St. Clair Butterfly Foundation has successfully helped to change laws in several states to better protect children.

Each year 1-in-4 girls and 1-in-6 boys are victims of abuse. Let’s help these children find their voice. Founded in 2007 by Chip and Lisa St. Clair, and based on his bestselling memoir, The Butterfly Garden, the St. Clair Butterfly Foundation utilizes the power of creative arts, literature, and overall well-being to impact the lives of children facing adversity. Listen to Chip and Lisa’s radio show: The Divine Frequency: Turning Your Passion Into Purpose Tuesday at 9:30 am Eastern Time on Empower Radio

Your donation gives the greatest gift to a child! 33 It shows that they are loved and that they deserve to eydismedia.com be heard.

ELVIS LIVES! DO YOU? by David Larson

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e boarded the bus to go pick up tickets to one of our favorite shows in Las Vegas, Le Reve, and, on the bus returning home, sat two seats ahead of a guy dressed in an Elvis outfit. I immediately asked him if he was going to be in the show we were seeing the following evening involving an Elvis impersonator. He said he wouldn’t be performing at that venue, but it did start a nice conversation. “Did anyone ever tell you you look like Alan Alda from

M*A*S*H?” he said to me. “All the time,” I replied, “Does anyone ever tell you you look like Elvis?” The whole bus erupted in laughter, making me realize everyone was listening to our conversation. My wife Carol and I continued to chat with “Elvis,” a.k.a. Charles David, the charming and interesting fellow who had just befriended us in this exotic city. He began to tell us all about Elvis’ life, his favorite songs, and his own history of impersonating Elvis for more than thirty years, interspersing

tidbits of information between verses of his rendition of “Hound Dog.” Along the way, he spontaneously broke out into a number of Elvis tunes, commenting on how many people think all you have to do to be Elvis is “put on a white jump suit, some side burns, and a red scarf. It takes a lot more than that,” he said. “You have to know how to move, carry your body, and yes, you have to know how to play guitar and sing! It’s got to be in your blood. It’s not a matter of acting—it comes from your soul,” he said, as he broke out into a verse of “Jailhouse Rock.” The career had been good to him financially, reporting he’d made a ton of money stepping into Elvis’ blue suede shoes.

“Ever been to Graceland?” I asked. “Sure, I’ve sung there several times. Even got to sit in his living room chair.” You could see, as evidenced by the sparkle in his eye, that he was reliving a memory special to him. “Elvis loved the gospel tunes best,” he said. “Oh, ya, he loved those hymns, didn’t he?” I replied. “Look your wife in the eyes as I sing this.” I turned to Carol and he broke out into a chorus of “Love Me Tender.” It was really sweet…serenaded during a eydismedia.com 35

and never believing the naysayers who said what they dreamed of couldn’t be done, they found not only public recognition, but, more importantly, life fulfillment. Your turn: What’s your dream? Who will you let talk you out of it? Do you do what you think you “should” or “have to” do? Or do you follow the yearnings of your heart, never to be silenced by critics, health problems, or life circumstances?

chance meeting with Elvis. He seemed oblivious to the fact that he was also entertaining the entire bus.

struggles and challenges Alan Alda faced to become the Tony and twenty-time Emmy winning actor that he was in his career.

“I make all my own clothes,” said Elvis, “including the ones I’m wearing now,” as I noticed its jewels sparking in the sunlight coming in through the bus window.

Known most for his role as Captain Benjamin “Hawkeye” Pierce in M*A*S*H during the 70s, life was not always easy for Alda. Even though his father was in show business, Alda had a rough start living many of his pre-school years in smokedfilled railroad cars, being raised by a mentally unstable mother who tried to stab his father with a knife when Alan was six, and struggled with polio as a child. It reminded me that success does not just fall into someone’s lap. You work your butt off for it. You follow your heart even if it doesn’t make sense to others. You face challenges that others would use as an excuse to give up. But with the tenacity and courage spewing from the souls of Charles David and Alan Alda,

“Really?”, I asked. “Sure, when I started out and had no money. I thought, well, if others can do it, so can I! So I learned how to sew my outfits. Other impersonators loved them so much I began sewing for them too. I’ve outfitted over a 100 Elvis impersonators around the world.” As he told me all this he went through to be a success at his chosen profession, I remembered some of the 36 | Eydis Magazine

“If we meet again, I think I’ll call you ‘Hawkeye’,” Charles said. We smiled at each other as we fist-bumped, “And I think I’ll call you Elvis.” Take it from the “The King” and “Hawkeye:” dream as big as you can let yourself. Persevere, ignoring obstacles that you see only when you take you eyes off your vision. And make yourself happy by being who you came here to be. David is a licensed psychologist in private practice who has been leading people into life fulfillment for more than thirty years. His work with Kate Sholonski at Triumph Leadership Group involves creating and sustaining healthy and productive relationships in the workplace. David is a contributing author to four books, has been a TV talk show host, and resides in rural Minnesota with his wife, Carol.

Live your authentic life

Take the road less traveled eydismedia.com 37


Dear Liberty by Liberty Forrest

Dear Liberty, My son (in his 30s) and I have been close throughout his whole life. I adore my son and would move heaven and earth for him. He’s always been easy-going and we’ve never had any problems in our relationship. He’s never been great at responding to messages or emails, but we’ve always talked for hours when we’re together. So when he wasn’t replying recently, there wasn’t anything different, yet something didn’t feel right. Eventually, he wrote to say he’s working through some resentments and wants some space to do that. I’m heartbroken! I can’t imagine what I’ve done that has left him feeling resentful toward me, and I’m really upset to think I’ve hurt him in some way. I’m pretty good at recognizing when I’ve messed up with someone and I have no problem apologizing, so he should know I’d want to say I’m sorry if I owe him that. I have no idea why he’s upset with me and I feel just terrible. Even worse, he’s choking on resentment when talking about it would allow me to apologize or explain myself so we could put things right and he wouldn’t have to feel like this anymore. I fear his silence is going to do a lot of damage to our relationship. I want to write back and tell him that but I fear making him even more upset if he doesn’t want to hear from me. What should I do? Signed, Heartbroken Mom Dear Heartbroken Mom, As the mother of five children, I’ve experienced this sort of situation myself so I can understand how painful it is for you.

perhaps he’ll remember that you wouldn’t have done anything to hurt him on purpose and that will soften the edges of his feelings.

First, if your son has asked for “space,” he might see your behaviour as disrespectful if you write again. He’s a grown-up and I’m guessing he knows that you’re the type who apologizes, so perhaps he wants some time to discover why he is feeling resentful.

And when he does surface and you’re able to talk about things, maybe he’ll discover that he should have spoken to you a lot sooner for the reasons you mentioned in your letter. This could be a valuable life lesson for him.

By that, I mean it’s possible he will come to the conclusion that he played a role in whatever is upsetting him—because this is often the case in any unhappy situation between people. Or

Whatever is bothering him, he’s asked for space, so I would highly recommend that you give that to him and let him figure it out for himself. I know it’s hard. But if he’s already feeling resentful, I don’t

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think you want to give him one more reason to make it worse. I hope you hear from him soon and trust that with a solid lifelong foundation until now, you’ll be able to work things out. In the meantime, all you can do is be patient and when you think of him, send him love.

Best Wishes!


Liberty Forrest is an award-winning inspirational author and Huffington Post contributor. For five years, she did frequent phoneins on the BBC as a psychic/ medium. With a background in social work and counselling, Liberty’s unique program uses a highly creative multifaceted approach to get people unstuck so that they can move forward in their personal and spiritual evolution.

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Connecting You With You



re you willing and committed to live your MORE, no matter what? Do you give your self permission to imagine beyond what you know in this present moment? Do you tap into the power within you, which can guide and direct you into your more?

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OR do you argue for your limitations and your ‘circumstances’? Do you stay stuck in what you know and what’s familiar? Or do you blame something or someone and live in the past? Well, your Soul and the Universe has so much in store for you if you

are willing and committed to embark on the adventure it has for you! When you are willing to be open and vulnerable to hear, see, feel, and do what it takes to allow change and possibilities to occur by connecting with

allow yourself to be open and to connect. Remember, at the core of you is your soul’s essence, your true self and your original divine blueprint, which is based on LOVE (Living Only Vibrant Energy). You are a child of divine source and the universe wants what is in your divine order and highest diamond potential! The “diamond potential” is the energy of the brilliance of your soul expressing through your personality/egoist self. It is what divine source wants to provide to you if you allow it and how the divine channels live through you and your true self, your soul’s essence.

your soul’s essence, it opens the doors to your MORE! Your soul’s essence channels in the divine light, love, and truth from the universe (God, higher power, the divine, divine source, however you define this for yourself) through your personality/egoist self when you

We weren’t taught to feel into if someone or something is in vibrational alignment to our highest order and fullest potential. Usually we just say yes because we think we should or it’s the right thing to do. Or we think and believe (many times subconsciously) this is how we can get energy, get something or get someone to do or be a certain way (including our own self) to accomplish and have what we want. In fact, this is the epitome of co-dependency and why most live life looking to the outside for their love, acceptance, approval, validation, safety, and security versus finding it ‘inside’ of themselves.

Most think their way through life, rather than feel into and through an experience, choice, decision, or action. Our society has taught us to answer the question “what do you think about ______?” versus “what do you feel about ______?” or “how do you feel?” Notice it in your speaking how many times you say the thinking phrase and immediately go into a mental process, rather than into a feeling into process.

It’s powerful to find out more about your own co-dependency and how it may be running you. You can take our free Co-Dependency Survey and receive an in-depth report reviewing your different traits and characteristics, which are affecting your way of BEing and doing, your relationships, and all aspects of your life. This can support you to becoming aware and healing the past so you can manifest your MORE. Go to: http://cocreateyoursuccess.com/ success-tools/assessments/.

Try changing your thoughts and speaking to “how do I feel?” and see how many times this is not the norm in your thinking or speaking. Practice switching the words from think to feel. As you do this more often and consistently, it will create a new wiring as to how you approach life.

Your journey of life is really about feeling and knowing what’s true within for you by connecting with the vibration of your soul’s essence and receiving guidance from the universe. Give yourself permission to approach life this way because it actually takes the pressure off the personality/egoist self to not try to figure things out

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Power ©2015 Keenawah & Associates, LLC

Image: Power from The Diamond Co-Creative System™

The Universal Energy Form of Power from The Diamond Co-Creative System™ provides the energetic vibrations to help you activate your Soul Codes of Destiny and connect to the Power within you. This sacred geometry technology assists you to tap into your Soul’s power and live your MORE by aligning your energetic bodies with your Soul’s Essence and the Universe’s Highest Potential that it holds for you.

and make it happen, and allow for the divine unfoldment. Your feeling and knowing within can change your skewed and/or old beliefs, which can be based on the past, conditioning, and programming. You might even discover some of your beliefs are not even yours…they are other people’s opinions and imprints you took on as your own from them. Your beliefs can be sourced from your genetic or linage encoding too. 44 | Eydis Magazine

So be willing and take this opportunity to see, hear, feel, and know what’s true for you so you can shift into vibrational alignment with your soul’s essence and highest diamond potential! With willingness, add in the energy of commitment to help you take a stand no matter what the personality/egoist self (mind) tries to create as a challenge, obstacle or excuse, (even if it seems like a good one). Tapping into your soul’s

essence (heart) and power will assist you to journey onward, even when you don’t think you can or want to, or if you don’t feel like it. Remember, how you do anything is how you do everything! COMMITMENT Commitment can be a tricky thing and a four letter word to some. Maybe in the past you’ve become overwhelmed by it and don’t follow through to achieve what you want, you stop five minutes before your miracle, completion, and/ or manifestation. A reason for this is that you could have commitment wired up in a negative way, such as: “Commitment is too much responsibility.” “If I am successful, I will lose something or someone.” “I have to pay a price for my commitment and success on some level.”

you falter to default with old habits and ways of BEing and doing. But think and feel commitment as if your life (or your child’s life) depends on you keeping your commitment. Wouldn’t you do whatever it took to keep your commitment if that was so? Well, it’s true because you can’t achieve any intention, goal, or vision if you don’t keep your commitment to yourself (or even others), so your life does depend on it.

“I’m not good enough or worthy enough to have what I want or to be successful.” “There’s not enough time and I have too much to do.” So your commitment wanes and

Your well-being, your new life, and your co-creations and manifestations of your intentions into your MORE does depend on it! And, as you tap into your soul’s power within, you will have even more energy, awareness, and clarity as to what you’re thinking, feeling, believing, and doing; be willing and committed to go for your MORE!

SUGGESTED MEDITATION: I am willing and committed to be open to see, hear, feel, and do what it takes to tap into my soul’s power and allow for my divine order and highest diamond potential to manifest!

As the Developer of The Diamond Co-Creative System™, Amanda Butler has helped thousands over the last 14 years to heal their past, activate their Soul Codes and create vibrational alignment with their Soul’s Essence and personality/egoic Self. The result is … they feel connected with their authentic Self, purpose and love with the ability to manifest and live their MORE and Highest Potential. www.CoCreateYourSuccess.com https://www.facebook.com/ createyourdiamondlife http://cocreateyoursuccess. com/28dayjourney/

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ARE YOU AN EMPATH? by Sharon Carne


or as long as I can remember, I have always been deeply empathic. I had no idea how deep until one day I had one of those realizations that really hit me. This one felt like a baseball 46 | Eydis Magazine

bat. This realization changed my life and deeply challenged my entire belief system. Many years ago, a student arrived for his guitar lesson saying that he had suffered from

a stomach ache all day. After making sure that he did not need medical attention, and that his parents knew about this, we enjoyed playing his favourite music and he left feeling better. But now I had the stomach ache.

in anything I had learned up to this point that explained how such a thing was possible. I also realized that I had probably always been doing this, but was completely unaware of it. Now I was aware! And I had a big problem. I had to figure out what was my own stuff and what I had soaked up from someone else. Some days I felt like a sponge! My curiosity was ignited. My trail to the library and bookstore deepened and I signed up for Reiki and yoga classes to learn to become more aware of my body and energy systems.

And I knew for certain it wasn’t mine! And I also knew that this wasn’t the first time I had taken on someone else’s pain. How on earth had that happened? There was nothing

As I began to accept the reality of the human energy system, I started to collect some skills and tools to figure out what was my stomach ache and what was somebody else’s stomach ache, and to figure out how to release anything that didn’t belong to me. As I expanded my curiosity into finding out more about energy and vibrational medicine, my belief system expanded.

Did I stop being a sponge? No. Actually, I became more of a sponge. That is, the empathy deepened as I learned more about it. I found out that I am a physical empath, which means that I can easily take on the symptoms of those around me. The understanding, skills, and tools that I have been learning usually keep things in balance. I also believe that it is one of my greatest gifts in my service to others. I was ecstatic when the Calgary Herald published an article on July 21, 2008 by Albert Nerenberg, which was all about empathy and the scientific discovery of what is believed to be the physical basis of empathy—mirror cells. I also learned that the energy system is measured by frequency. The whole system responds to, heals, and comes into balance with sound and frequency. A large percentage of the human population is born eydismedia.com 47

with, or is developing, deep empathic abilities. Like it or not, there can be serious physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual symptoms to this ability.

followed by an unbelievable wave of deep sadness. It shook me to my core.

So, fast-forward to March 2011. A devastating earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear emergency in Japan captured most of the world’s attention and emotions because of the immediacy of the information. Especially that was sent over social media.

I wrote down the time and when I checked the newspaper the next morning; it stated that there had been a major explosion at the nuclear plant at Fukushima, the same time I felt the explosion in my body! It took days of my own personal emotional meltdown to process that experience out of my body.

This event also had many of the sensitive empaths around the world reeling. A few days after the earthquake and tsunami, as I was getting ready to go to bed, I felt a huge explosion in my body. This was

Many people these days are having difficulty managing a deepening sensitivity to what is going on, not only in their own lives and community, but to what is going on in the world in general.

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Since my baseball bat ‘realization’ many years ago, I have been collecting as many tools as I can get my hands on to help me manage this empathic sensitivity. Since I know that I am not the only one struggling with this, I am sure that many others are also trying to figure out how to deal with this. There has been a lot of information flowing lately about humanity’s growth in consciousness. What few people seem to be addressing is that there are physical symptoms associated with the expansion of awareness. With the deep connection that has been created through the internet and social media,

we really see and feel what others are experiencing. We are deepening our sense of connection with each other. And our empathic response. Growth in awareness or consciousness expands empathic ability among other things. Some of the accompanying symptoms are puzzling and some of them downright distressing. The medical community even has a term for this sensitivity: compassion fatigue. Deeply empathic nurses and doctors who serve people with traumatic and serious injuries will take their patients’ conditions on, creating symptoms not unlike post-traumatic stress disorder.

Here are a few other characteristics or symptoms: •

You are uncomfortable or overwhelmed in crowded places like the mall.

You pick up on other people’s feelings like they are your own. Sometimes it is really hard to tell what is yours and what is theirs.

You suffer from fatigue often.

You are drawn to holistic therapies or healing.

You can be overwhelmed by negativity.

You are highly intuitive.

You sometimes take on the symptoms of those around you.

Your sense of smell, taste, sight, touch, hearing, etc. is acute.

Sound is one of the most powerful tools you can use to help manage a deep empathic sensitivity. I use it daily to help keep me centered and clear. Here are a few tips: •

Put on some lively music and move or dance. Move out any energy that is not yours.

Stand in the grass in your bare feet. Ground into the earth and let any energy that is not yours drain out through your feet.

Listen to nature sounds. They bring you back into balance so gently.

Check my article, “Sing a Healthy Song” on pages 93 to 95 of June’s issue of Eydis Magazine. The first tip describes a vocalized sigh, which is a great way to release any energy you may have picked up or your own emotional energy. Tip two, where I describe the “Ho” sound, is also helpful.

Laugh! Laughter is great medicine that returns you back to harmony in a wonderfully fun way.

If you feel or know that you may be an empath, I encourage you to explore the depth of your sensitivity. It is one of your greatest gifts and will serve you well as you serve others. Sharon Carne is an author, speaker, musician, recording artist, sound healer, Reiki master and consultant. Sharon is the founder of Sound Wellness, whose programs are at the forefront of education on how sound and music can be easily applied to your everyday life—to reduce stress, help you concentrate, energize you, inspire you, support your health and so much more. www.soundwellness.com

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f you have been reading my articles, you already know the terms Indigo, Crystal and Star Children. These children (and adults), whose traits include being wise, intuitive and caring, often seem

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like old souls. I also recognize their growing multi-dimensional qualities. They know the importance of peace, love, acceptance, and unity for all beings—human and otherwise— and for Earth herself.

Being multi-dimensional means being aware of dimensions that many others are not yet aware. One dimension that is recognized is the energy within and around us. Perceiving this energy as thought, images, or sounds, and accessing

and subconsciously believe they must take care of their parent, constantly monitoring the adult’s comfort levels and feeling immense responsibility for the well-being of their parent. This is not a healthy situation for the child, the parent, or the relationship.

Does your child act like he or she needs to take care of you? This pattern can be changed. Does your child act like he or she needs to take care of you? This pattern can be changed.

information from your inner and outer environment, including across time and space, brings a wider range of knowledge. What happens if you are onedimensional, with minimal to

no awareness of the additional information, or even its availability, and your child or student is multi-dimensional? I’m noting in my practice that these children realize that they can access more knowledge

I have had the privilege of counseling children and preteens who attend sessions with their parents. I have observed when the child knows s/he accesses more information than the parent and so believes that s/he knows more. While this may be true in regards to multi-dimensional information and existential knowledge, it is important for these families to remember and discuss together that parents still have the benefit of “years on Earth.” This means that the parent has very important information for the multi-dimensional children eydismedia.com 51

in regard to day-to-day life skills. Please remember parents and teachers: though you are working with incredibly smart individuals, multi-dimensional children are not mini-adults. Similar to gifted children whose knowledge base is above age level, their emotional and age-related skills are not as developed. Children must be children. Explain to your multi-dimensional child that you can take care of yourself. Here’s an example of this conversation: (Incidentally, these are not non-verbal children, but they don’t have familiarity with words for these types of dialogues, so they primarily respond with facial and body language.)

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Judy: I notice how you keep checking on mom to be sure that she is doing okay. Child: (nods yes) J: You know you and I often talk about things that your mom doesn’t seem to understand. C: (nods) J: That’s okay. Your mom has information about other things. C: (looks at me questioningly) J: There are so many things happening with friends and school and stuff that you really don’t understand. Right? C: (nods yes emphatically)

J: These are things that I know about, but so do your mom and dad, and your teachers, and other adults. Trust them, just like you trust me. C: (understands) J: There are many things that you know about that the adults don’t yet, and there will be times for you to explain it to us. There are also many things that we know about and you don’t. This is our job. And it’s all okay. Here’s another really important thing: Mom’s job is to take care of herself, not you taking care of Mom. C: (looks over at mom with deep eyes that question if this will work)

Parent: (confidently looks back) Yes, I can take care of myself. You don’t need to do this. J: Shall we begin to let this change happen? Won’t it feel good? C: (Nods emphatically) Periodically the child may look back to check on mom, but I recognize it as it occurs and assure them mom is okay. Mom confirms. Later I point out when the child does not check so I can reinforce that behavior. Though your child has multidimensional awareness, s/ he will often require explicit instruction to understand how to navigate social and other situations. Teachers and parents can appropriately guide multi-

dimensional children while still acknowledging their gifts. It is imperative that we learn to recognize the gifts that both groups—one-dimensional and multi-dimensional—can impart to the other, and to the whole. The multi-dimensional share the big picture, remind us of what’s true, and show us what we as individuals and society can attain. In turn, those who are single-dimensional can provide loving, protective support for the multi-dimensional to develop their natural gifts and to provide social skills for the world that they are trying to navigate. We have an opportunity to listen to those who live multidimensionally and learn what they can offer to us now, and for

our future. Especially when they are in adulthood, it is likely that those with multi-dimensional abilities will guide us to neverbefore thinking that can deliver us from many of our current problems, and into a world of peace, love, and oneness.

Judy Lipson is a licensed, professional counselor and educational strategist in West Bloomfield, MI. She helps clients of all ages who have learning difficulties, work or school related anxiety, ADHD, Asperger’s Syndrome or Autism Spectrum Disorders. Contact Judy at 248.568.8665 and judylipson@ spiralwisdom.net, and visit SpiralWisdom. net for more information. This article is for informational purposes and is not meant to replace medical care.

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The Butterfly Moment What is a “Butterfly Moment?” There is an incredible “HAPPENING” that occurs when a caterpillar becomes a butterfly. The caterpillar is encapsulated by a cocoon of its own making. It is imprisoned in a state of total immobility and darkness. Understandably, it must be a time of pain, panic and despair. However, as a certain life force of “allowing” takes over, this creature instinctively “lets go and lets God” an incredible transformation occurs. It is a transformation and struggle that is totally personal. Scientist tell us that if you help a caterpillar by cutting it out of the cocoon it will die because this struggle pushes life giving energy deep into its growing wings. In other words, “no pain…no gain.” As life energies slowly break loose the caterpillar from the cocoon, an incredible moment occurs. This caterpillar has a realization. It is a moment when it finally understands that all of this pain, panic and despair were for a reason. The caterpillar is not what it thought it was! It is one of the most beautiful insects in the world… that can fly!

Can you think of a more “AHA!” moment that this?



John Schalter and Carrie Hall (married) are professional Life Coaches, who specializes in personal growth, relationship and career coaching. Their solution-focused coaching techniques offer a highly-personalized program tailored specifically to you. With compassion and understanding, they work with you to help build on your strengths and attain the personal growth you are committed to achieving.

Specialized Areas: • Personal Growth

• Confidence & Personal Power

• Professional Development

• Inner Peace

• Relationship Coaching

• Achieving Balance

• Communication Skills

• Health & Weight Issues

To hear more Butterfly Moments from John and Carrie, listen to Empower Radio, Tuesdays at 9:00 Eastern Time. To find out more about Quantum Leap Coaching go to butterflylifecoach.com or call 586.997.4357 10% of all proceeds are donated to the St Clair Butterfly Foundation where John sits as the Board President To find out more about the St Clair Butterfly Foundation visit stclairbutterflyfoundation.org

by Anna Pereira


hen we are feeling bad and seek support, we are more receptive to love filled support. How can we better

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serve our friends and loved ones when they are not feeling so great? How can we meet them where they are and help them get to where they want to be?

I sit in my chair, behind my computer, as I work mostly from my desk, and feel my breasts resting on a fluffy shelf—my belly. Recently, I put


Make a Better World

my boobs and hanging over my jeans, which I had to go up a size in? Where did it come from? What is this tire that has developed that was not here before? Now my breasts rest rather comfortably on a fluffy pillow.” I’m not happy about this at all. I know I’m getting older and my body is changing and things happen. I know hormones change and, sometimes, it’s not just about diet or exercise. So, I have an appointment this week at the doctor to get a check-up. I really do not want to step on the scale. I know that part of the doctor’s job is to give me a thorough examination and part of my overall health evaluation is to track my weight. I get it. But emotionally, I do not want to know. I’m sure many women, and men, can relate to how I feel. I know I gained weight! My clothes don’t fit right, I’m not feeling good, and the last thing I need to know is how “fat” I really am.

on some weight. My diet hasn’t significantly changed and I try to keep a rather healthy lifestyle. I know I can definitely get some more exercise in, which wouldn’t

hurt, but this weight came on rapidly and almost overnight. That’s what we all say, right? It’s like, “What is this under

It’s his job. It’s his responsibility to let me know. I get that. I need to know as it aids in my taking responsibility to change my lifestyle to get down to a healthier weight. However, emotionally and mentally, it’s one thing I really don’t want to deal with. The insensitive, eydismedia.com 57

clinical part of being explained I’m not in optimal condition. I know what needs to be done! I run an entire community about wellness for goodness sake, but I’m going to see the doctor. I’m hoping to learn if there are reasons, other than the obvious, that attributed to this sudden gain. I need to know about my health via medical tests, for my hormones and metabolism, that I cannot know without the proper test, like my thyroid for example. I’m going there to see if there is something else causing my lack of energy, weight gain, and other symptoms that I’m feeling. I wish that the doctor can just meet me where I’m at and take me where I want to be as far as my health. Just tell me what’s wrong and help me to get better. The piece of getting

on the scale and being told my weight, I can do without. But I know he has to go into areas and explain things to me so I’m fully educated. This is where being a friend to someone comes in. When we are being a good friend to someone and a great support, sometimes we just need to meet them where they are and offer to support them to get to where they want to be. It’s not our job to give them every detail of where things are wrong, lacking, or need improvement if they already know they are unhappy in a specific area of their life. In fact, coming across as insensitive, or with lack of tact or sensitivity (like doctors sometimes do), may just make them resentful, defensive, and want to separate themselves from you. Opening

up space to listen to what’s going on with them and assisting them get to where they want to be with compassion and love will help them get to a happier and healthier space. You do not need to solve the issue or condemn them. Making someone feel worse by pointing out what they feel bad about already, doesn’t aid in helping anyone. And yes, sometimes we see the red flags waving high, but supporting them is helping them with a positive approach. If I were to talk to my friend about how I felt physically and emotionally about my weight gain, a friend would probably make sure to pick healthy meals to eat with me or even go out on a walk with me. This is positive support and takes me from where I am currently to where I want to be. This is ideal to me rather than a doctor dictating to me what I’m doing wrong, how unhealthy and/or sick I am, which emotionally is such a toll when you are already aware of your challenges. I’m aware that I’m not at an optimal weight and (this really happened) accusing me of over-indulging in cakes and desserts is not helpful. How can we better serve a friend and the collective consciousness by supporting someone? • KNOW WHEN YOUR POSITIVE SUPPORT WILL BE WELCOMED. Your friend must be ready to

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be supported. Sometimes you have to wait until they are sick and tired of being sick and tired so your love and support is received positively. • OFFER TO BE THERE FOR WHAT THEY NEED AND WHAT THEY ARE READY FOR. Sometimes the advice we want to give isn’t what they want to hear or is overwhelming in itself. If we know what their goals are, we can offer better advice to support them. In my example above, bad advice from a friend would be, “Hey let’s go run five miles right now.” Uh, no thanks. I don’t run. Perfect advice would be, “Let’s take a nature walk. Maybe three to five miles? Are you into that?” That is supportive and really shows their love for me and my well-being. • HAVE AN OPEN HEART AND MIND. What we think is best may not be what they feel is best serving for them at that particular place and time in their lives. • LISTEN. Sometimes they just need you to be there and just need to be heard, and you don’t have to take them anywhere. Allow the space

for them to purge a bit of emotional baggage so they can begin to see where they need to go to be happy. • TREAD LIGHTLY. Almost all of the manifestations of stuff that happens in our lives are the result of deep emotional or physical trauma. When supporting someone to get to a better place, know that sometimes your help, although you have tried your best, will not get them to where they “want” to be. There may be unresolved issues, or issues they don’t even know exist, that must be healed before they can move forward. When we do our best to help a loved one out and they arrive at a better place, it creates a ripple. If they feel good, they will pass on the good vibes, raising the collective consciousness on this earth.

I strongly believe if we are all healthy in mind, body, and spirit, we are happy. If we are all happy and conduct every action from a love filled space with an open heart, peace is the result. Imagine that? World peace. So how can you assist someone, to get to where they want to be? We all contribute to the wellness of humankind when we help each other. Be well and spread love. I am a world changer. I needed a place to thrive and be with like hearted people who care about the world, so I created “The Wellness Universe”. Along with my co-founder, Shari Alyse, I invite you, who impact the world in a positive way, to join us. Visit www.TheWellnessUniverse.com, a platform and network in our community. We are building this for people like you and me.

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SIMPLY Spiritual

M A E R S D T E R E TH P EX Dear Frustrated, I go to a new town to visit a friend of mine. I go to Dear Dream Experts, a chiropractor to see if she can help. I tell her that I dreamt was with husband we were talking to this asking questions, and mystructure husband Roninwas answering them. He my neckI has no my curve andand I need someone to lady. fix She was You desire to build your life (healing was giving great answers, so I told him “You are blowing me away!” The lady said she heard some noises around my husband and said “It’s it. She says she doesn’t know what that means. I your neck and spine). There is a part of you that probably those entities around that want to be your babies. I know you just had sex.” My husband agreed. realize at that point that she probably isn’t a very understands healing (chiropractor), but do not Sincerely, good chiropractor. When I leave the office, I go feel able to heal your need for structure. You do Embarrassed in one room that has all these healthy, natural find some valuable knowledge (healthy treats) snacks. I take some of the snacks and leave. There within yourself about healing. When you move Dear Embarrassed, are some tough looking boys that start coming away from your healing, you become fearful of toward so Ionrun away. I go tothat the place where to (husband) different of yourself (boys You are me, focusing a part of yourself you are committed andparts you recognize that this part ofchasing yourself isyou). quite brilliant. is another part of yourself thatisyou have not identified (the lady). See if of youyou can describe herthought in one or two my friendThere is supposed to be, but she not there. I There is a part that you youwords. could This (lady) part of yourself has something to do with inner listening (hearing the entities that want to become babies). Babies get mad at her that she wasn’t there. She said she count on (your friend), but you realize you can’t represent new ideas or new ways of being. You have set into motion the potential to create some new ideas (sex). These new ideas left and was sorry that she couldn’t see me. rely on this part of yourself. are getting your attention.

Sincerely, Frustrated

Email your dream to the address below for a chance to have it featured in an upcoming issue of Eydis Kathryn and Patrick Andries are the dream experts. They are the authors of the recently released book from Ozark Mountain Publishing, Naked in Public: Dream Symbols Revealed, and The Dream Doctor. If you would like a dream interpreted, please send it in the body of an e-mail to: intuitiveschool@sbcglobal.net. Learn more about their books at www.ozarkmt.com.

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I want to go on a vacation. I was talking to someone on Facebook that was a friend that I never met. She asked me if I wanted to come visit her in Nevada. I decided I would go, even though I knew it would be a long trip because I live in Kansas. I bought the plane ticket and my friend picked me up at the airport. We drove through the city to get to her house. There was a lot of traffic on the roads and people were weaving in and out of traffic. I told my friend to slow down, and at first she got mad at me, but then she agreed that she should slow down. Then we kept driving towards her house that she said was in the country. We arrived at her house and it was surrounded by water. The waves were huge. The house was made of glass. We were sitting down trying to get to know her family and I couldn’t focus on the people because the waves were crashing against the house. We ran outside to get away. I was thinking I should call my parents and tell them what happened. I tried to call them but my cell phone didn’t get service out there. I tried to find the home phone, but couldn’t.


rick An and Pat n y r h t a by K

Dear Lost Tourist, You are desiring to take a mental break (vacation) from your regular thinking patterns. You want to focus on a new way of thinking associated with your friend. When you decide to focus on this new way of thinking, it leads you to a different mental state (Nevada). In order to think in this new way, it requires you to set your mind on a new goal (airplane ride). At first, the transition to this new way of thinking is difficult for you and your body (traffic and road congestion). You felt the need to slow down, yet there was a part of you that wanted to race through life; after some cooperation within yourself, you were able to slow down. You now feel isolated and overwhelmed (waves crashing on the house). You feel a lack of privacy, which adds to your sense of being overwhelmed. You fear your experiences are so overpowering that they are going to cause you harm, so you run away. You want to connect with your higher-self (parents). However, you have difficulty connecting with your higher-self (unable to find a phone).

Sincerely, the Lost Tourist

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by Jodi Grinwald


ow many people do you know that like to be judged? How does it feel when someone places judgment on you? We all have the right to have an opinion, but sometimes that opinion goes a bit further.

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These phrases may sound familiar: “oh, look what she is wearing,” “wow can’t believe they said that,” “they shouldn’t have done that because it would have been better if they did it this way,” or “I wish for once she would have…….” Not too long ago I attended my niece’s oratorical contest. She wrote this amazing speech about kindness and how your best brings out the best in others. She is in the sixth grade. It was an empowering speech and so much of it was about my Dad, her Grandfather, that we lost to ALS last year. As I was sitting there listening to my niece share her four plus minute speech, I looked around at the audience. In the audience were four people with clipboards, the dreaded judges. They sat amongst the contestants and their families. I watched as they took notes. I couldn’t read what they were writing about my niece. I just thought about how proud she was to write the speech. As I sat listening to the speech for the first time, and watching these judges take notes and their facial expressions, I kept thinking how I was hoping they weren’t writing anything negative. I had a knot in my stomach about what their judgement was of my niece. Between daily conversations with others, and within our own minds, we spend a lot of time without even realizing it judging others, comparing them to ourselves, and then we ultimately judge ourselves as well.

We listened to all the contestants speak and I watch the judges around the room write on their magic clipboards eydismedia.com 65

that decide who is going to get a financial scholarship. At the end of it, the decision is made and only three out of seven people win and my niece was not one of them. I felt so disappointed for her, but more importantly I saw the disappointment in her face. While chatting with her afterwards some family members start to discuss why they felt that the other contestants didn’t do as well as they thought she did. That moment I realized the other families may have been saying something to the contrary as to why their child won against my niece. My niece put herself in the situation to be judged as so many others do. From pageants, to promotions, to scholarships, we are always competing. In some instances, you may be doing it to yourself,

while in others it may just be the way it is at your job or school. What is most important to know is that when you, on your own, put yourself in a situation where you are asking to be judged, you have to be ready for whatever the outcome may be. Disappointment is normal and a part of life. However, is it fair to put others down because of your loss or your win? We definitely learn from these experiences and, as someone once told me, there is always someone better than you at doing something and someone who isn’t as good as you. My question is, does it really have to matter? It does if you want to place yourself in situations where being the best is so important. Sometimes we think we need that because it helps with our self-worth, but does it really? The problem with using competition as a

way of feeling better about ourselves is that it could backfire and that leads to more self-doubt and negative selftalk. When deciding to go into a competitive place its always best not to be too attached to the outcome. Difficult for sure, but when you are not attached to the outcome you will not bring on the negative self-talk. Competition is all around us. The question is what you do after you win or lose. When you are about to judge someone here are a few things to consider: • Question: Ask yourself, why is it important to evaluate someone’s words or actions? • Circumstance: We tend to think that the way people act at every moment represents their true character. That way of thinking never allows for any extenuating circumstances. Someone cuts you off on the road and automatically you of course think they are inconsiderate and may even call them a few names. However, maybe they are in a hurry because they need to get home due to someone in their family not feeling well, or they are rushing to say goodbye to a loved one leaving to go overseas. It all depends on the story you tell yourself because you will never really know the truth. • Time: How much time and energy is it taking you to decide why someone may

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or may not have done something that was right or wrong? Aren’t we all asking for more time in our schedules? • Benefits: How do you truly benefit by judging someone? • Acceptance: This is the opposite of judgement and therefore provides the antidote. When someone shows you who they truly are, believe them. You may not like it. You may not agree with it, but you cannot change someone else. The other part of judgement is around the judgment of ourselves in comparison to others. We all at times feel a bit insecure because someone may be better at something that we really want to be good at. Someone may have gotten that promotion, is more flexible

in yoga class, writes better, is reaching their sales quotas quicker and easier, or is just a better speaker than you. Go back to the five tips above and use them on yourself. No good comes out of negative selfjudgement. Meet yourself where you are. You can always strive to do better, but if you do it because you are judging yourself in comparison to someone else the likelihood that you are thinking about whatever you are doing in a positive light is small. Do it for you and that changes the whole dynamic. When you think you have the answer for someone else’s journey, you infringe your beliefs on them and that takes away from their learning experience. That needs to come from within. If you decide to put yourself out there to be judged, know that is exactly what you are going to be. It’s not someone else that

has to tell you that you are good enough. That first has to come from within. If you don’t go within, you will go without. Jodi Grinwald, CPC, ELI-MP is CEO & Founder of Today is the Day Coaching, Consulting, and Leadership Development. Jodi is a Connection Coach and empowers individuals to connect to their highest level of success, fulfillment, and happiness. She has just launched a workshop called “From Diaper Bag to Briefcase” in an effort to work with those who are struggling to juggle career, family, and all the heavy bags they carry in their lives that represent their multitude of responsibilities. She is helping people find effective ways to live their true passion. Jodi is also a business and executive coach working with employees to better understand their role within an organization, ultimately connecting to their organizations mission and performance standards.

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The art of writing is the art of discovering what you believe. –Gustave Haubert

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Write For Eydis Media eydismedia.com/be-heard

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GET BACK TO HAPPY! by Gary Stuart

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ummertime is the time to enjoy the outdoors and nature, and family and friends, using the good weather for pleasurable activities. Summer is fun with picnics, concerts, visits to lake beaches, or mountain treks are on everyone’s schedule. This is the time of year to connect in less stressful ways than we normally allow ourselves to connect. We see it as a time to be happy with life and the weather and enjoying getting away from the daily grind. It feels good to break our daily routine and escape all the stresses that go along with our personal and professional commitments. As we know, time flies and then it’s back to school as the fall season starts before the next holiday season commences.

The million-dollar question is, are we really happy doing it all and managing the stress, responsibilities, and turmoil that follow us in everyday life? Life and time is too short not to be enjoying the journey as we go along our path towards our future. Yes, as we know, life throws many curve balls with health, aging parents and end of life decisions, newborn children, or grandchildren to contend with. It seems to never stop coming at us. It’s important to remember that it’s all a gift and enjoying the daily journey is the key. As the seven dwarfs taught us as baby boomer children, “whistle while you work.” It’s also important to include those who aren’t happy or ecstatic with their daily grind for survival without the tools or the money to be happy. One of the biggest ways to “get back to happy” is gratitude! It’s not my intention to minimize anyone’s suffering from less than desirable circumstances. Remember, no matter what your station is in life, one thing that universally holds true is that suffering is optional, or even a choice. eydismedia.com 71

Many of us came from families that seem to wear a badge of courage for how much suffering we took. There can also be a hidden belief that happiness is light or meaningless and pleasure isn’t the point of life at all. As we all know, misery loves company! These beliefs are old habits from reinforced negative dynamics/mindsets that can be really hard to break no less transform. Most families have a silent set of rules of belonging, most often unspoken but strongly implied. We as family members are expected to know these unspoken rules inside out and respond in kind. The elders feel they have to enforce

this history, thereby repeating itself however dysfunctional. Each family seems to have been molded by its own ancestral history. Even we too buy into it as the newest generation as well. The deeper irony is that when anyone bucks the status quo of the family system, they pay a price. Nine out of ten times that person is rejected or made an outcast, or mostly a black sheep, for challenging what is known with something that’s new and unknown. It’s a big price to pay for belonging, but so often worth it, as stagnation can be deadly not to mention boring as all-get-out. Many who disagree or agree to disagree know it’s

worth the price of admission to speak up. Why suffer or be miserable till death for familial release, or become a casualty from inaction? Many agreeable family members feel that it’s their required fate and destiny to toe the line. Suffering is commonly viewed as respect and many of us feel it’s the price for belonging to our family of origin. This doesn’t have to be true but many feel the familial obligation to suffer accordingly. We often become fearful to rock the boat due to consequences by the majority of the status quo. I find very often it’s a deeper sense of guilt for betraying that really freezes us into inaction when our

Our life is like money, it’s ours to spend however we wish!

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you. I recommend you leave the misery with those who forgot why they’re here in the first place. If you doubt this, look at a newborn baby laughing and filled with joy. Maybe each generation gets reminded of this through each baby that comes to remind us of the hope, joy and happiness that’s our birthright! I leave you with a question to ponder: is your life worth living if you sacrifice your desires for the needs of other to be happy instead of yourself? Ask yourself why. Remember, you happily came here to be you!

Take my new happiness test at www.TestYourHappiness.com and get a FREE live consultation! family is a dysfunctional group we belong to. So much for our personal happiness? I find many family members unconsciously reenact dramas and traumas of others who came before. It’s a show of loyalty and love as a way of honoring those who passed from other generation. It’s like the ancestral memory is contained in the surviving future descendants. These symbolic emotional prices are paid in tribute to the suffering of those who came before. This suffering may be easier to endure rather than the guilt or shame of being different. This fear of betrayal and its consequences holds many in line, which makes “happiness” not a viable option. “How can I be happy when others suffered and died horrible deaths before me?” I’ve found suffering to

belong has its own secondary gain; as stated before “misery does love company.” Maybe there’s comfort in bonding through dysfunction that becomes normal for most relatives within our family system of origin. The fear of being rejected from them for speaking up has its own cost; there is an emotional price to be paid either way. I always go for making trouble, which is much livelier than denial or complacency and it’s less depressing too. It’s a tight rope for all of us or, at the very least, a balancing act to keep our place in our family and keeping everyone happy. We really need to put ourselves first to feel empowered as what is the point otherwise? There are plusses and minuses either way. I find what makes you happiest in your heart is the right choice for

Gary Stuart, Author, Constellation Facilitator, Teacher, Lecturer, has been documenting his healing experiences over the past several decades. As a young student of Primal Therapy and Shamanism, his insightful writings provide a unique perspective on the correlation between the micro and macrocosmos, between our inner and outer worlds. His first book on constellations, Many Hearts, ONE SOUL, set the stage for his latest book, Master YOUR Universe: How to Direct & Star in Your Own Life on Kindle or paperback at Amazon.com. He leads workshops and trainings nationally and internationally and resides in Los Angeles. Visit www.HealingInActionNow.com or www.ConstellationHealingInstitute.com eydismedia.com 73

Wealth Consciousness Manifest your destiny



hat if your kids could grow-up having a healthy relationship with money? Would they choose careers they love as opposed to ones they think they should be in? Would they fight less with their spouses about money? Would they be generous, charitable, and financially responsible?

Early Money Experiences Matter Think about what your own financial upbringing was like. Was money discussed in your home or was talking about money off 76 | Eydis Magazine

DON’T WAIT Very young kids grasp the idea of saving, sharing, spending, and waiting for what they want. Tots can hold money, make small purchases, and learn to spend only what they have. These early beliefs and attitudes about money are carried into adulthood, having a strong impact on their financial lives. DO SHARE YOUR VALUES For example, if education is a value in your home, let your kids know you are deferring spending money today so you can put money away for their education in the future. Or, if you are planning a family vacation, find an example of not spending money today so that you can use this money instead on your vacation. Teach kids to be deliberate with money.

limits? What you saw and heard about money growing up likely affects how you handle your finances today. You have a wonderful opportunity to teach children responsible and healthy money lessons. Here are my top tips for raising prosperity-minded kids:

DON’T WHISPER Money doesn’t need to be such a secret. I’m not suggesting that you need to divulge every little detail about your financial situation or financial woe, but open up the conversation about money with your kids. Explain what is happening in the economy today and how this affects you, them, and your family. Share with them how you’re saving and talk about investing in front of them. DO EXPRESS GRATITUDE Teach kids to focus on what they are grateful for. When our children were little, before going to sleep, my kids and I shared

five things we were grateful for. They would list things such as: I am grateful we are a family, I am grateful for my friends, etc. DO HAVE FUN WITHOUT SPENDING Instead of going to sporting events, movies, or shopping as a way to spend family time together, find ways that don’t cost anything. Playing board games or playing games outdoors are ways to spend time together, have fun, and they don’t involve spending money. These are often the activities that, no matter the age, your children will value and remember most vividly. DON’T NEGLECT THE POWER OF YOUR MIND Train your kids to use their minds to picture the results they desire. We have the ability to mentally rehearse the results we desire and greatly improve our ability to realize these outcomes. When Olympic athletes are asked how they prepare for an event, they talk about their mental preparation. They may picture themselves crossing the finish line first or earning a perfect score on the balance beam. Teach your children to do this for any goal they have, including financial goals. DO CREATE PROSPERITY PICTURES In addition to having your kids picture in their mind what they desire, encourage them to actually make pictures. This can be done with drawings or by creating an actual “prosperity picture.”

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financial principles, but not so much that they think money is unlimited. Let them learn to make choices based on financial limits.

This is where you take images from magazines that represent goals and put them on a poster board for inspiration. Give these images a frame and place them on the board according to how much money they’ll take to reach and the time it will take to reach them. Make sure to hang your kids’ prosperity pictures somewhere they can see to remind them of their vision. DO GIVE BACK Giving to others is one of the best ways to not only share our values with our children, but also to help them focus on their blessings. Whether you volunteer as a family or make decisions on charitable contributions as a family, you are helping your kids realize that one of the blessings of money is being able to help others. DON’T SPREAD NEGATIVE MESSAGES Children are amazing at sensing attitudes and messages, even those that are

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not verbalized. Are you teaching your children that money is scarce or financial decisions are frightening? Do they hear you arguing about money with your spouse? Be aware and deliberate on how you discuss money with them and around them. DO GIVE ALLOWANCE An allowance is a great tool for teaching money management. For example, children can divvy up three portions: saving, spending, and giving to help others. Give your kids enough money to learn important

DON’T BE AN ATM (Always There with Money) PARENT I’ve seen many parents hand their kids money whenever they ask for it. With teenagers, it’s saying yes to “Mom, I need money for dinner with my friends.” There’s certainly nothing wrong with wanting to support our kids. The question is: if you’re always handing money over to your children, what are they learning? Are they learning what you want them to learn? By being conscious of what we say and do with our children regarding money, we can help them form positive money habits they will keep for their entire lives. Ellen Rogin, CPA and CFP®, is an Abundance Activist® and author of the New York Times best seller, “Picture Your Prosperity: Smart Money Moves to Turn Your Vision into Reality.” Learn more about Ellen and her programs at. www.ellenrogin.com


Advertising that Works


Healthy Living

MY EVIL TWIN by Liz Bull


think we all have an “evil twin” that lives within us. They have the nasty habit of lurking in the background waiting for an opportunity to rush to the forefront of our minds and criticize us relentlessly, making fun of our heart’s desire, crushing our dreams, and breaking our hearts. 82 | Eydis Magazine

My evil twin, for example, is really convincing and persuasive. She shows up most often when I am entering new territory or wanting to try

something new. She’s quite accomplished at mocking my desires to try out new things, like writing articles, learning to salsa dance, taking an improv

class, or even travelling to a place I’ve not been before. You may have found that it’s your evil twin who has been eydismedia.com 83

So how would you like to quiet your evil twin/inner critic? Here are five steps:


Positive self-talk is so important here. Each time your evil twin attempts to shoot you down or discourage you, praise yourself. Say, “I am fabulous. I know what I’m doing; now beat it.”


When your evil twin gets in your way and stops you from moving forward, stop and pay attention. Ask yourself what is the underlying fear? Fear, after all, is just a feeling. It’s not real. I love the acronym F.E.A.R.—False Evidence Appearing Real. Ask if it is worth sacrificing your creativity, your dreams, or yourself.


Avoid comparing yourself to others. It’s deadly. In fact, in the Basque language, the translation of “criticism” is “little murder.” There is always going to be someone out there who is smarter, more talented, prettier, or taller. So what? Embrace your uniqueness. You are good enough just as you are. You’ve got this!


Form a mutual admiration society. Spend time with people who are supportive, say nice things to you, recognize your beauty, and accept you for who you are.


When your evil twin is loud and just won’t shut up, just let her ramble. If she’s bent on criticism, tell her that she may continue to speak if she likes but she can only whisper. Put her on notice that there is no way that you will actually listen to her. And at this point you may just start singing “La la la la la la la la... I’m singing over you and I cannot hear you. ha! ha! ha! ha! ha!” Sounds silly and it works!

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mocking you about permanently losing the weight that has crept on, letting the best version of you shine through. My evil twin is really quick to say that I’m not smart enough, pretty enough, rich enough, young enough, clever enough, talented enough, or even tall enough (I’m 5’2”). “Forget it,” she says, “you’re just not good enough.” Or, “Ha! That’ll never work.” Years ago, as far as weight loss was concerned, she pointed out that I had a slow metabolism and Hashimoto’s disease. I am not entirely sure she even knew what metabolism or Hashimoto’s were, but that did not stop her from commenting, oh no! She pointed out that I loved cheesecake, hated exercising, and that I must have fat genes because of my mother’s side of the family and, after all, my mom weighed close to 300 pounds. My evil twin is a master at triggering all of my insecurities and fears. I spent decades believing her. And, her words came loaded with feelings of defeat and shame. I would say to myself, “I’m never going to make it, or have it, or do it, or be it. I may as well quit before I really humiliate myself.” My evil twin would then slide

demanded that she come forward. Here’s what I found. She wasn’t at all what I imagined. In fact, I found that she was a bit like a parrot who simply repeats what it has heard over and over again. Then I began to see her attempts to thwart me as rather amusing. You see, if you listen closely to your evil twin, a.k.a. your inner critic, you’ll find that she often sounds a lot like things said by teachers, friends, siblings, and especially parents. What they said may have possibly been helpful twenty or more years ago, but it’s no longer relevant to you. Worse, some of the things they said may have been downright mean and hurtful. Many of them were outright lies (some well-intentioned, some not).

quite contentedly (and smugly) once again to the recesses of my mind. There she would stay until my next thought of being, doing, or having. Standing up to her never worked. She’s so clever and accomplished! It seems like she has been with me my whole life. Then, one day, I had a eureka moment. I realized

that she was an enigma and like a shadow. My evil twin had no name or face. She was simply “the voice,” the voice of my inner critic. I started to think that perhaps there must be something more to her, something that I could work with to quiet her. Frankly, I just wanted her to shut up! So I closed my eyes and

What if John Lennon had listened to his auntie? “Playing the guitar is all very well, John, but you’ll never make a living at it.” I’d love to hear about your evil twin; email me at liz@lizbull.com or call (9am-5pm EST) 919-357-5054. Want some help taming your evil twin? Sign up for a complimentary test drive with me at www.lizbull.com.

Liz Bull helps women (and brave men!) who are fed up with weight loss programs that don’t work to finally get a body and a life they love. She is dedicated to busting up the myths, misconceptions and misinformation about obesity. With her innovative signature program she works with her clients to release their limiting beliefs, doubts, and fears, and helps them tap into their natural abilities and their bodies’ wisdom, making weight loss easy and safe. A Medical Intuitive, Master Theta Healer and Certified Virtual Gastric Band Practitioner , Liz has long been fascinated by the important role mind, body, and beliefs play in our lives. Her other studies and certifications include EFT, Psych-K, Matrix Energetics, Access Consciousness, QiGong, NLP and Transcendental Meditation. She has transferred her successful healing/mind-set work with businesswomen to the arena of weight loss because she has experienced first-hand the havoc and misery that obesity creates not only for the sufferer but for their families. www.lizbull.com eydismedia.com 85


by Vanessa Chamberlin


ur country has a diet problem. Heck, our world has a diet problem. If you’re reading this and you don’t live under a rock, you’ve noticed the vast array of diet plans available right now. Anyone who has browsed a shelf of diet books or joined Facebook and had their friends market weight loss programs to them is probably familiar with the sea of diet trends. Those of us who’ve been around the diet block a few times have seen them all come and go. From high-carb low-fat to high-fat 86 | Eydis Magazine

(usually plus a little extra) once they go back to their normal eating habits. Do you know why? Because their normal eating habits are no good! Plus, when you deprive your body of what it needs to survive, you get strong cravings to fill that void. The dieting cycle ultimately leaves you craving high-calorie, sugary, and fatty foods because you’ve taken away what your body needs: whole, balanced nutrition that satisfies you.

low-carb, to cabbage soup to bananas—it is bananas! Even though some of these diets have the staying power to garner several years of TV appearances and book after book, I think we can all agree that they don’t really work, right? Don’t get me wrong, some people will try a diet and lose weight and keep it off long term. That is extraordinarily rare. Most people will try a diet and fail. A good number of people will try a diet and lose some weight in the short term, and then gain that weight back

There are a lot of reasons why people fail at diets, but what you need to remember is that you didn’t fail. The diet failed you because it set you up for unrealistic expectations, it deprived you, and it took away essential nutrients by urging you to cut entire food groups. These diets fail because they do things like tell you that one little change can make up for simultaneously eating a lot of junk, or they convince us that we have to buy some overly-processed, packaged food instead of buying natural ingredients. The diet programs fail you because they promise the world for what seems like a small price, but they promote unsustainable methods for losing weight and their products will inevitably end up being too expensive, impractical, or just downright gross. And then there are the contraptions that promise you a hard body in no time, but I’m not even going to get started on that. eydismedia.com 87

So, if the diets don’t work and we’re surrounded by bad food that tempts and tricks us into getting addicted, overeating, and putting on pounds while simultaneously being undernourished, what in the world are we supposed to do? The answer is all around you: plant-based eating. You can start a little at a time; edge out the food that doesn’t make you feel good and replace it with veggies, fruits, nuts, seeds, beans, and other plant-based items that give you nutrition, energy, and satisfaction. Or, you can jump in all at once and ceremoniously empty your fridge, pantry, and snack drawer. It’s all about what works for you.

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The wonderful thing about adopting a plant-based diet is that it’s not a diet. There’s no counting calories or using other equations to see what you’re “allowed” to eat. There’s no thought at all put into macronutrients or fat grams, protein, carbs, or sugars. For the most part, you don’t even need to worry about portions or going for seconds because, if you’re eating nutritious veggie dishes without added fats, sugar, and salt, then you can simply listen to your body and eat when you’re hungry. Your body will adapt to whole nutrition and send you appropriate signals so that you know how to stop when you’re full. By following some simple, plant-based eating suggestions,

and making an effort to eat a rainbow of colorful fruits and veggies, your body will totally change. People who make the switch and adopt this approach to cleanly and completely fueling their bodies have seen physical changes like better skin and hair to boosted energy levels, mental changes like clarity and improved memory, and spiritual changes like higher self-confidence and self-love. More Benefits to Plant-Based Eating • Lower risk factors for disease •

Help prevent or manage chronic illness

Greater energy levels

Healthy weight

Beauty inside and out— have wonderful hair, skin, and nails as well as strong muscles and bones! Experience better moods and lowered stress

By changing your habits forever—not just for a month, a few months or a year—you are changing how your body functions. You are changing how you interact with the world, how you see yourself, and you are taking an active role in fueling your beautiful and vibrant outer self as well as your passionate inner self. Stop the diet cycles! Get rid of the diet mentality forever. Stop feeling guilty and deprived. Give your kitchen a makeover and update your grocery list

minerals, and will have the added benefit of giving you a healthy glow.

to start on the path to the you you’ve always wished you were. Plant-Based Eating Tips If you’re eating a whole, fresh, plant-based diet, you can follow all of these principles and get to a healthy weight and maintain that weight with no counting or measuring—just long term wellness and life! •

Eat when you’re hungry. Stop when you’re full.

Drink water frequently to stay hydrated and make sure you’re not mistaking thirst for hunger.

Look for colorful fruits and vegetables. The various colors mean they contain different vitamins and

Eat plant-based foods to fuel your passions and your workouts—don’t forget that stress management and exercise are part of a healthy diet!

Vanessa Chamberlin is a Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, Lifestyle Coach, and author of The FireDriven Life: How to Ignite the Fire of SelfWorth, Health, and Happiness with a Plant-Based Diet. For more information, please visit www.vanessachamberlin.com and connect with her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/VanessaChamberlin/ or Twitter @vkchamberlin. eydismedia.com 89

your path your dream

Own your own local Eydis magazine


by Kate Sholonski


love a good metaphor and I love nature, so the combination of the two will often speak to me in a way that simply makes sense and provides some wonderful life lessons. My latest learning came from taking care of my multiple hanging baskets of petunias that decorate my front porch. Although I don’t consider myself a gardener, and typically leave the watering, feeding, and care of our flowers to my husband, this year I decided to take on the responsibility of keeping our plants alive and beautiful myself. A large part of this necessary care is removing the deadheads (the dried up flowers that no longer serve a purpose, not to be confused with Grateful Dead fans). I have found a way to make what can be a tedious and even boring job, such as searching for and picking deadheads, enjoyable. In this case, it was by focusing on seeing the removal of the dried up, no longer needed buds as a necessary step in facilitating new growth. Without it, the plant stops flowering on a regular basis, leaving me with bald hanging baskets several weeks before the end of summer. So what may be an obvious metaphor for life is how necessary it is to also remove our unwanted, unneeded, and unnecessary components of our lives that, if left untended, will ultimately stifle our growth. 92 | Eydis Magazine

Some potential deadheads of life: •

Repeated negative or scary thoughts that hang on and prevent us from taking risks that could be beautiful adventures.

Daily habits that, although familiar, prevent us from seeing what else is possible.

Obligations that do not bring out the best in us, but we do nothing about ending them because we’re afraid to say “no.”

People that are not fun to be around and seem to steal your joy.

A job that no longer stimulates you to grow and expand.

Clutter in your home where the the only purpose is to gather dust.

Book shelves loaded with books you have no intention of ever reading.

Extra body weight that makes it challenging for you to move and do the things you would love to do.

A refrigerator and pantry filled with unhealthy foods.

Clubs, activities, and pasttimes that no longer engage and stimulate you.

Old beliefs that keep you stuck.

What else? To keep this job of removing deadheads interesting for me, I make it a meditation time where I peacefully consider what unnecessary particles of my life can be plucked, making room for new growth to emerge and bloom.


Kate transitioned from a 28 year nursing career to life coaching and as a personal fulfillment workshop leader in 2001. After many years of coaching people from all walks of life, she and her business partner repeatedly heard requests from their clients to combine joy and fulfillment with leadership principles. It was that concept that led them to create their business, Triumph Leadership Group, where they focus on training teams from all sized businesses to build positive and productive cultures. Kate and her business partner, David Larson have co-authored two books, Wide Awake: Three Minutes a Day to an Inspired Life and Heartfelt Leadership: Creating a Culture of Connection. They believe when relationships don’t work, the business doesn’t work and that workers who share heartfelt connections will help business thrive on every level. eydismedia.com 93


Self-Care Wiz

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by Dr. Kate Siner


fter years of working my tail off, I realized that if I didn’t take care of myself one of two things was going to happen: either I was going to compromise my health or I was going to compromise my results. Self-care became my battle cry. Over time, I learned the undeniable merits of self-care. I also came to understand that practicing self-care can sometimes be difficult to fit into a busy day-to-day schedule. When I made my practice of self-care a priority, both my health and my ability to get better results increased. This was a win-win for my life. My strongest suggestion to help you be your personal best is self-care, self-care, and selfcare! Self-care is an investment in your personal resources. Whether the achievement of your goals requires a lot or a little of your resources, you need to take care of your most important tool–yourself. eydismedia.com 95

Here is a list of ten self-care techniques you can use to be your personal best.


and almost immediately look at our smartphone or TV. If you haven’t already put yourself on a technology diet, I’d suggest doing so. Limiting the amount of time you spend looking at screens can have a fabulous effect on your quality of life.


Be Less Negative and Spend Less Time Around Negative People. It takes two to tango. If you’re in a negative mindset, then chances are the people around you are too. Take some time to work on your mindset first. Bring more positivity into the way you think and speak. Then choose to be around people who reflect your new mindset, whether they are new acquaintances or not.

Move Your Body & Feed Your Body. Movement and nutrition are essential to self-care. Learn to lovingly and joyfully move your body. Dance, do yoga, stretch, walk, or engage in more vigorous exercise. Feed yourself everything your body needs to be healthy. If you’re not sure what this is, start by drinking more water and eating more greens. Spend Time in Nature and with Animals. Both of these experiences have a positive effect on our overall wellbeing. They help us de-stress and relax. An animal’s playful and loving ways do wonders for our moods. And taking a walk in the woods can help us feel connected to the larger world. If you can’t get outside, get a plant, or two, or three.


Unplug and Watch Less TV. We’re wired 24/7 these days. We wake up

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4 5

Let Go of Grudges. Nothing pulls your wellbeing down more than un-cleared anger and resentment towards others. The only person suffering from your negative thinking is you. People can be short-sighted and can sometimes make mistakes. Yet holding onto the mistakes of others is the biggest mistake of all.


Spend Time with Awesome Friends. Spending time with people you love and doing fun things with them—especially things that include lots of laughter—is a wonderful way to relax and connect two important aspects of self-care.


Mental Hygiene. Obsessive thinking and worry are so commonplace that people think it’s normal to act and feel these ways. While common for sure, these are not healthy patterns. Learn to stop yourself when your worry or catastrophic thinking gets the better of you. Simply say stop and focus your mind on something more pleasant or productive.


Make A Difference. Being of service is a powerful way to bring good feeling and wellbeing into your life. Service to others gives us a sense of purpose in the world. So, take a weekend to volunteer at a food bank, community garden, or your local Habitat for Humanity. You’ll put some good juju in the world.


Emotional Hygiene. Sometimes you just need to tend to your emotional backlog. If you have a lot of built up emotion or if you’ve been dealing with a lot of stress, the best self-care might actually be to throw a fit. Lie down on your bed and kick and hit the mattress with your arms and legs. Scream if it feels right. You’ll feel like a million bucks afterwards.


Gratitude. Nothing changes your attitude like gratitude. Take a moment every day to write or state at least three things that you’re grateful for. So many of us have so much to be thankful for. Remember this is a form of self-care.

Dr. Kate Siner is an award-winning Entrepreneurial and Personal Development mentor, speaker, author, and radio show host. She has a PhD in Psychology and years of both clinical and coaching experience. Her passion is to help people move past whatever holds them back so that they may embrace all they can be. Kate has developed a series of successful personal development programs, newest of which is LifeWork Virtual. Learn more at www.katesiner.com or email her at admin@katesiner.com.

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Immediately by Rachel Tipton


n today’s fast paced world, we are always looking for a quick fix and instant results. While fitness and weight loss are two things that do not happen overnight, here are three ways you can instantly improve your well-being starting today.

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FIND A WAY TO MEDITATE. Imagine that you woke up this morning, and immediately began doing bicep curls continuing that exercise all day long without a break. Your biceps would be fatigued to the point of screaming, right? Well, that’s what we do to our minds. Now, imagine your mind is a muscle. It gets worked harder than any other muscle all day long: planning, figuring out things, worrying, calculating, etc. Meditation scares most people because they find it difficult to quiet the mind. The point is, that we all have trouble with that. Meditation is a practice that takes practice. Simply put, you can start meditating by taking five minutes to focus on your breathing. Set a timer, sit quietly with your eyes closed, and focus completely on the breath moving in and out of your body. Choose a word or simple phrase to repeat. When your mind starts to wander (and it will), gently bring your focus back to your breath and your mantra. When you make this a regular practice in your life, you will notice that you become calmer and more clear-headed. You are finally giving your mind a break for a few minutes, which is exactly what it needs so that you can function at peak performance.


STRETCH FIRST THING IN THE MORNING. Most people, even the UltraFit, generally place flexibility at the bottom of the priority when it comes to fitness. After a crushing workout, drenched in sweat, we want to get to the shower and seek some calories, right? I know for myself, even though I am a dancer and know I need to stretch (especially when I am hot and sweaty; it’s the best time to stretch), I neglect it sometimes, too. If you really want to feel 100 percent better than you did yesterday, start your day off with a stretching session. It does not have to be something super intricate. Start by pulling your knees to your chest before you get out of bed in the morning. Once you get out of bed, reach up, touch your toes, and roll up slowly through your spine. Repeat that a few times while your coffee brews. You will find that a good morning stretch will wake you up and get your blood flowing. You will find that you feel better all day long. When you do, start adding a few more stretches, and before you know it, you will have an entire morning yoga routine!


DRINK MORE WATER. In the summer months, when the weather is hot, our bodies naturally crave more water. However, in the winter, when the heat is on inside, our bodies tend to get dehydrated as well. Take your body weight and divide it in half; that is the amount of water you should drink per day in ounces. If you are sweating and working out, you should drink more than that. Most people balk at that amount, thinking it is way too much. The fact is, drinking more water is the most effective weight loss aid. Nine times out of ten, when we feel hungry or hangry, we are actually dehydrated. Drink a big glass of water before a meal, and you might also find that you are less likely to overeat. Try it today; drinking more water is an inexpensive and simple way to feel more alert, improve skin elasticity, and improve energy levels.

Rachel Tipton is a fitness coach based in Pawleys Island, SC. Her background in dance gives her a unique perspective on all her specialties: aerial fitness, golf conditioning, and general personal training. Her goal is to help people overcome their personal obstacles so that they can live the most fulfilling and productive life possible: The UltraFitLifestyle. For more tips, or to contact Rachel for assistance on enhancing your fitness journey, please visit www.UltraFitLifestyle.com or call 843-424-0995

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zood les OODLES OF by Jennifer Knutson


• zucchini “noodles”

• 1/2 cup torn basil leaves • flesh of 1 ripe avocado • 1 cup peas (fresh or frozen) plus more for garnish • 1/4 cup walnuts, chopped • 1 Tbsp lemon juice

he dog-days of summer are upon us. It’s hot. It’s humid. It’s August, and the last thing anybody wants to do is stand in a hot kitchen or eat heavy, processed food. Enter, the spiralizer. I’ve had my spiralizer for almost a year and I can tell you, it is a staple in this household and used at least once a week!

“Zoodles” are zucchini “noodles.” They are gluten free, paleo, primal, vegan, low carb and wheat belly friendly.

• 1 clove garlic, mashed

They can be sauted, boiled, roasted or eaten raw. They are about the most perfect food and a great way to use up those beautiful zucchini’s you have in your garden. A tasty light side or meal!

• crumbled feta or grated parmesan for topping

Veggetti Pro, Amazon, $21.89 Spiral slicer comes with 3 interchangeable stainless steel blades - thin, thick & ribbon Easy to clean, dishwasher safe

This is what I use!

Zucchini Noodles with Avocado Pesto

• 1/4 tsp salt • 1/4 cup olive oil • black pepper to taste

• chopped walnuts for garnish (optional) If you are using frozen peas, quickly blanch them in boiling water and then refresh the peas in iced water Add the basil leaves, avocado, peas, walnuts, lemon juice, garlic and salt to a food processor and pulse until finely chopped Add the oil and continue to process until you have a thick paste Add fresh ground pepper to taste, check the seasoning and add more salt or lemon juice to taste Gently mix the zucchini noodles with the pesto until all the noodles are coated Top with crumbled feta or parmesan cheese and chopped walnuts Serve immediately and enjoy!

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Shrimp and Zoodles in a Parmesan Pesto Cream Sauce • 3 medium zucchini squash • 1 Tbsp butter • 1/2 cup room heavy whipping cream • 1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese, extra for topping • 2 Tbsp homemade or store bought pesto • 8-10 oz cleaned peeled shrimp • 1/4 tsp garlic powder • 1/8 tsp paprika • 1/8 tsp sea salt • 1/8 tsp black pepper • extra virgin olive oil for drizzling

Wash and slice the ends off your squash. Using a spiralizer or a veggie peeler, slice your zucchini into noodles and set aside. Bring a nonstick pan or skillet to medium heat and melt your butter and add your heavy whipping cream. Sprinkle in parmesan cheese and stir, then add your pesto. Reduce heat to lowest setting and allow sauce to stay warm while you cook your shrimp. Bring a pan or skillet to medium heat and add a drizzle of olive oil (or use butter if you prefer!) and your shrimp. Season with garlic powder, paprika, sea salt and pepper and cook on each side for about 2 minutes until shrimp curl and turn a pinkish-orange and opaque. Add the noodles to your shrimp and stir, giving the zucchini noodles a chance to soften slightly. They’re best al-dente, slightly tender with an nice bite to them. Pour your sauce over the mixture and serve. Top with freshly grated Parmesan cheese and your choice of extras from the list above.

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Spicy Thai Zoodles • 3 medium zucchini, spiralized into zoodles • pinch of salt • 16 ounces mushrooms, chopped • 1 bag of shredded carrots • 2 large eggs, beaten • 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes • 1/3 cup lite soy sauce • 3 Tbsp brown sugar • 1 tbs sriracha • 3 cloves garlic, minced • 1/2 inch knob ginger, peeled and minced • 1/4 cup cilantro, chopped • 4 green onions, chopped 1.

Lay zucchini noodles out on a couple layers of paper towels, sprinkle with salt, then cover with a layer of paper towels. Let sit for 10 minutes to remove the extra water from the zucchini noodles.

2. In the mean time, heat a skillet over medium heat, spray with non stick spray, add beaten eggs and red pepper flakes and stir to scramble the eggs. Remove the eggs from the skillet and set aside. 3. Spray skillet with nonstick spray again and return to stove. Add carrots, mushrooms, and garlic; saute over medium high heat for 5 minutes or until veggies are a bit undercooked. 4. In a medium bowl combine brown sugar, soy sauce, sriracha, and ginger; whisk well to combine; pour mixture over the vegetables in the skillet. 5. Press the paper towels against the zucchini to absorb the moisture- you can even roll up a bit to get the most water out as possible. Add the zucchini noodles to the skillet, toss gently to coat/mix. Saute for 2-3 minutes, then add eggs, green onions, and cilantro to the skillet; toss to combine/ coat well. eydismedia.com 103

TIPS WHEN COOKING WITH ZOODLES: Make sure that you have a large enough pan to catch all the zucchini noodles. The best thing is a half sheet pan. Get zucchini which are medium in size. Large zucchini will have too many seeds. You may want to break some of these up before cooking them. It is much easier to do while they are raw than when they are cooked. When cooking this zoodles recipe, it is best to use tongs. You have to keep them moving in the pan, otherwise they will lose too much liquid and become soggy. Sprinkle some salt on the spiralized zoodles. The salt will help draw out extra moisture. Blot with a paper towel before sauteeing. Make sure NOT to start cooking these until just before you absolutely need them. Why? Because they get cold quickly and will turn to mush if you make them more than 30 minutes ahead. Zoodles do not reheat well. But they are super yummy cold, as left-overs! 104 | Eydis Magazine

Caprese Zoodles • 3 large zucchini

Using a spiralizer, create zoodles.

• 2 Tbsp extra-virgin olive oil

Add zoodles to a large bowl and toss with olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Let marinate 15 minutes.

• kosher salt • Freshly ground black pepper • 2 cup cherry tomatoes, halved • 1 cup mozzarella balls, quartered if large • 1/4 cup fresh basil leaves • 2 tbsp. balsamic vinegar

Add tomatoes, mozzarella, and basil to zoodles and toss until combined. Drizzle with balsamic and serve.

Live in the moment

Believe that you can do anything


Profile for MY Authentic Life Magazine

August 2016  

August 2016