Following your heart in times of change
Life is ever changing. Standing at a crossroads can be simultaneously daunting and exciting. I know because I’ve been there.
Those moments when your life spins on it’s axis. Redundancy, bereavement, illness, divorce. Everything changes in a heartbeat. Nothing is the same again.
I remember how lost and confused I was. How scared I felt. I wish I had known then, what I know now.
That life was leading me somewhere. A place beyond anything I could imagine. A place that was better for me, my heart and my soul.
In those moments when you feel disorientated, lost and can’t see a way out…
…here are ten questions you can ask yourself, to help you flow with life.
#1 What really works in my life today?
When you are faced with big change, it is easy to think everything is broken. It isn’t. In fact nothing is broken, although I know that can be hard to believe. Make list. Today. Of everything that works in your life. Remember to breathe – it’s going to be OK.
The journey of a thousand miles begins beneath one’s feet. Laozi
#2 What do I want?
You may think this change means you have no choices. That you just have to take something and run. This isn’t true. At this crossroads you get to write the next chapter. Now is the time for dreaming. Take a moment for yourself. Go somewhere quiet. Answer this question: what do I really what?
All our dreams can come true. If we have the courage to pursue them. Walt Disney
#3 What makes me thrive?
You probably think you just have to get on with things. Put other’s needs before your own. There is another way. You are being given an incredible opportunity. A point in your life where you can reset and rebalance. You can only do this fully if you know what makes you thrive. The environment, types of people, your passions. Create a beautiful mind map of everything you need to thrive.
I rise to taste the dawn, and find that love alone will shine today. Ken Wilbur
#4 What is my vision for me in my life?
You may think that you have no place to be visionary. That visions are for others right now, not you. Think again. You are here for a reason. We all are. A vision can be to be the best mother you can be. A vision can be to inspire and touch thousands of lives. It doesn’t matter what it is, what matters is you know yours.
Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes. Carl Jung
#5 How does my vision relate to this change?
You are half way through. How are you feeling? However you are is OK. It’s time to get practical. To join up the dots between all you have learned so far. Review your answers so far. What are the themes? The common threads? Take your time. How does this change link to your vision?
Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Golda Meir
#6 What are my options and choices?
You may still be feeling lost and confused. Be patient with yourself. Change takes time – except when it doesn’t! You have gathered a lot of information. Information that will help you to reflect on your options. It’s time for another mind map. Write down all of your options and choices, big and small. You don’t have to act on them, just know that you have choice.
You know you have made the right decision when there is peace in your heart. Shaa Wasmund
#7 What am I most scared of?
Some of your options and choices won’t look very appealing. Some of them will look pretty scary. That’s normal. Change does feel frightening, it can also be exhilarating! You are on the edge of something truly wonderful for yourself. Get a blank piece of paper. Fill one side with all of your fears. On the reverse write one undeniable truth about you.
Fear is excitement without breath. Dr. K. Bradford Brown
#8 Who can help me?
It is easy to believe you are alone. That you are isolated. You’re not. You have people in your life, near and far who can help. Draw a circle on a big piece of paper. On the inside write the names of people you feel closest to. On the outside add the names of any other people you know. This is your support network – they rock!
Leap and the net will appear. John Burroughs
#9 What’s my first step?
The time has come. To take your first small (or big) step. You can’t get it wrong. You can trust yourself. You know what to do. I think you knew that all along though. Remember now you have a plan, to hold it lightly. The dance you do with life, will lead you to your desires.
If you follow the whispers, life doesn't need to shout at you. Danielle La Porte
#10 How shall I celebrate when I’m through?
There is a certainty. That life is ever changing. Take time to look at how far you have come. Acknowledge yourself. Thank others. Celebrate with loved ones. Breath it all in. Feel grateful for who you were, and who you have become.
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. Oprah
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© 2014 Danielle Marchant Photography Credit: Amanda Clarke