Broken Themes
Golden Keye(s)
Small Portions
Nick Hunter questions effort of theme day participation see Opinion - pg. 3
Mason Berger profiles Connor Keyes’ journey to Minnesota see Sports - pg. 8
A new Quill feature collects little known facts and info see Back Page- pg. 16
Published by the Students of Elder High School
February 28, 2020
Volume 88 Number 6
Hope Squad making immediate impact Rob Engelhardt ‘20 Staff Writer
Earlier this year, Elder students were
introduced to Hope Squad. Hope Squad is a designated group of students from each grade that were voted upon by their peers to serve as student advisors. Their main role and purpose is to serve as a set of ears if students want to come talk about their struggles. Whether their problems be in or out of school, Hope Squad members give advice and are friends to all.
First, I asked him what their purpose is. Connor replied by saying, “Our main purpose to be a main support group for anyone needing help in the school. We have been trained with tactics to help ease situations or potentially harmful relationships both at home and at school.” Junior member, Mitchell Meyer, has similar thoughts about Hope Squad. He said, “I think it is very special that Elder was able to create our own Squad. I think it is very important for guys that have so much pressure on themselves, like us, to
Senior Hope Squad members (left to right): Nathan Bill, Eli Darnell, Connor Ammon, William Doepker and Jack Telles.
Senior, William Doepker, further expanded on this idea of openness by saying, “We try to be the people in the halls who are smiling and greeting everyone to make them feel comfortable.” He later went on to say, “Personally, this has impacted me a lot as I now pay closer attention to my peers around me. It just goes to show how much I can impact a person that I didn’t know before talking to them.” Connor summed up his thoughts by saying, “We are fully prepared to help
stand and be recognized for their courage of accepting their nominations. All 23 members of this group are genuine and supportive guys that are always there to talk. After all, each member was voted upon by his peers so they must be good dudes. So, for now on if you ever are having trouble in or out of school, I am sure these guys are the best people to go to for advice or help.
Junior Hope Squad members (clockwise from top): Jacob Steins, Mitchell Meyer, Adam Duwel, Michael Macke, JT Miller and Brandon Vetter.
Sophomore Hope Squad members (left to right): Aidan Murphy, Leo Bill, David Gruen, Phillip Hoffman, Trey Jansen and Logan Bacher.
Freshman Hope Squad members (left to right): Ben Johnson, Bradley Lanter, Luke Flowers, Samari Freeman, Will Summers and Tommy Weber
Elder and Seton are testing this tool out for the first time this year. Most schools in our area have had groups like this, but most of these groups are adultled. Hope Squad is special because it is all student-led. Recently, I caught up with senior member of Hope Squad, Connor Ammon, to further ask about this coalition of students.
kids handle any sad or difficult situations that they are going through. Personally, I have found it to be so helpful to be able to go to my fellow members and just talk. That’s the kind of atmosphere we want to have while assisting kids: openness.” The student body was introduced to all the members of both Seton’s and Elder’s Squads at Mass a few weeks ago. At this Mass, all members were asked to
have fellow guys to go talk to. Whether it be about school or any other causes of stress, we are always here.” Having guys like these to go to in tough times is definitely reassuring to many students who may seek help in their personal lives. The students in Hope Squad are sort of like counselors that are not adults and may be an easier outlet to talk to and connect with.
Inside The Quill
Opinion....................................... 2,3 Faculty Features......................... 4,5 Student Features......................... 6,7 Sports......................................... 8,9 Features.................................. 10,11 Arts & Entertainment..............12,13 News........................................14,15 Back Page.................................... 16
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Friday February 28, 2020
Opinion
Bring back Hawaiian Thursdays Cafeteria food fills the bill Mason Berger ‘20 Co-Editor in Chief
Henry Mazza ‘21 Staff Writer
only Purple Fridays. That theme was Hawaiian Thursdays. This theme day speaks for itself. On Thursdays, students wear Hawaiian shirts along with their school pants. Instead of wearing the same school shirt that you wear every other day, change things up a little and sport a nice Hawaiian shirt on a nice Thursday morning at Elder. In a 2017 Quill article written by Wyatt Albers (’18), this quote by Eddie Cliffe (’18) is a great description of what Hawaiian Thursdays could bring to school: “Think of it as a Purple Friday on a Thursday. The ones dedicated to this are what we like to call the Elder man. Someone who will go out of the ordinary and get out of their comfort zone to express a little sense of solidarity in the school.” This is what we’re going for with the Hawaiian Thursdays idea. While this idea was for the most part limited to seniors in the past, this could be something that expands to all four grade levels, and possibly faculty. Everyone needs a break from normality every once in a while. When I brought this idea up to The Purple Quill staff, there were plenty of positive things to be said about it. The real question is, however: will people really stick with the theme? Jack Telles, who was spotted wearing a Hawaiian shirt as he sprinted the last quarter of a mile on the Big Whiskey hike in Wyoming, is all for the idea of bringing back Hawaiian Thursdays. “I think it would be awesome to bring Hawaiian Thursday back to Elder to show some color around the school.” says Telles. He also brought up the idea of the opportunity for Hawaiian aficionados to showcase their sense of style each Thursday, which would be nice. You may be wondering, why would I want to wear a Hawaiian shirt when it’s cold outside? Well, it’s not so much about warmth and comfort, but it is about partaking in something that is bigger than the individual. Bringing that tropical and colorful vibe to a classroom on any given Thursday is sure to bring a smile to one’s face. In the months of April and May, when the weather is warm, hopefully, people will want to get away from wearing the same purple collared shirt and go with the festive Hawaiian shirt that screams festivity. People want to see summer-like colors at this point of the year, and Hawaiian shirts do this exactly. My extensive knowledge of the Elder High School student handbook says that Hawaiian shirts should be viewed as acceptable dress code. Hawaiian shirts are shirts that button from the collar to the bottom of the shirt, so therefore, they are acceptable for every day dress at school. So, don’t worry about breaking rules when wearing Hawaiian. This extends to Hawaiian shirts and Hawaiian shirts only. Nobody wants to see someone be fully dressed in Hawaiian attire (i.e. hula skirt, coconuts, other Hawaiian clothing). Hawaiian shirts give off the all-business yet “I’m here to have fun” vibe, which is a total morale booster for anyone who sees or wears one. If you do not have a Hawaiian shirt, they are quite easy to find. Find your nearest thrift store and you can buy several for cheap. Most people will probably have one already, but if not, attaining one is simple. Hopefully, this is something that can at least last throughout the duration of the 2020 second semester. Again, this is not a new idea. This is just a proposal to the student body of a possible resurrection of the long-lost Hawaiian Thursday theme day. Make Thursdays tropical again. Let’s do this thing.
won’t be eating again until almost 6:30 or 7:00. For some, eating lunch starts at 10:30 in the morning which is completely ridiculous in and of itself. For a high school dude, waiting eight hours for the next meal is impossible without almost eating your hand. At this point, you are faced with a few choices. One, you can look around your table and scavenge for an extra turkey sandwich or bag of chips to eat after school or throughout the next couple classes. Two, you can plan on setting some money asides to grab some Chipotle or Chick-fil-A on the way home. Or three, buy some food in the cafeteria to satisfy your hunger. The cafeteria has a lot to offer these days. I remember three years ago when the best choice of food was a paper-thin burger that tasted like it was made with a mix of cardboard and fat. But, an entirely new cafeteria system has been implemented lately. They call it “AVI” foodsystems, installed to offer students a healthier and more well-rounded options when we meander down the lunch line. They have added what they call the Panther Express for those who need a quick snack in the morning or during lunch. The cafeteria also offers a daily special. So, each day there will be a main entre and some form of a side on the way out of the line. One fan favorite is the Skyline conies that Elder tries to mock. Although, they are not reminiscent of Skyline at all, they are still surprisingly satisfying. But, this was not provided by AVI. AVI actually has categories every day with specials inside of each category. For example, the “AGAVE” is the Mexican aspect of the cafeteria while the “PIAZZA” is the Italian side of it. However, you are looking for a cheap, reliable alternative to supplement the lunch you just ate. Some of the offerings that are up every day include chicken sandwiches, hamburgers, cheeseburgers and some form of potatoes such as potato wedges and or tater tots. However, the most infamous fast food that Elder has to offer has to be their pizza. Pizza is a universally liked food indeed. If someone says they don’t like pizza, you should probably check to see if they have a belly button because they may be from another planet. Elder’s pizza, though, can be hot or cold. Not temperature wise necessarily, but sometimes it is better than other days. For example, if it just popped out of the oven, it will be crispy, fluffy, and the cheese will be perfectly stringy, yet since the sauce has a higher heat capacity, you may burn the roof of your mouth. If the pizza has been sitting out it is easy to spot. The cheese will obtain this weird form of transparency and the crust loses all crunch. Despite some of the pros and cons of the relative time of sitting out, the new food system provides such quality ingredients that you can really never go wrong.
The brown bag lunch you just ate was good, but its only 11:00 a.m. and you that you
Pizza and cafeteria photos by Henry Mazza ‘21
Way back when in 2017, the students of Elder partook in a weekly theme that rivals
Hawaiian graphic by Tyler Macenko ‘19
The Purple Quill
The Purple Quill is published nine times per academic year by the students enrolled in the Journalism class at Elder High School. Content is determined by the staff and does not necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of Elder High School’s faculty, administration or student body. Signed editorials and columns reflect the views of the writer. Letters to the editor and guest commentaries are encouraged and must be signed, although anonymity can be granted on a case by case basis. The staff reviews letters to the editor, advertising and guest commentaries and reserves the right to edit and refuse material. Reasons can include length, clarity, libel, obscenity, material disruption of the educational process at Elder High School or violation of copyright laws.
“Give students the freedom of expression and soon everyone will want it.” Co-Editors in Chief: Mason Berger ‘20, Carmine Domenicone ‘20 Faculty Advisor Mr. Gary Rogers
Faculty Advisor Emeritus Mr. Edward Menkhaus ‘63
Graphics Guru Jack Langen ‘20
Staff Writers Jacob Byrne ‘20 Michael Connolly ‘20 Robert Engelhardt ‘20 Nicholas Hunter ‘20 Lukas Marlman ‘21 Henry Mazza ‘21
Gus Middendorf ‘21 Thomas Peters ‘20 Dakota Postel ‘20 Nicholas Seger ‘20 Jason Thomas ‘20
Friday February 28, 2020
Opinion 3
Theme Days are broken Nicholas Hunter ‘20 Staff Writer
Everyone knows how it goes when it comes to Elder theme days. The majority of
photo by Nicholas Hunter ‘20
people either just hear “purple Friday clothes allowed”, or if they don’t, they simply don’t come out of uniform. Rarely ever do we see a large portion of the school participating in an actual theme. This is a complete failure on the part of the theme day system. Obviously raising money for the causes the theme days donate to is a priority, but active participation in the theme could promote a happier school and therefore more participation in the future. I mean, what’s the point of a theme day if very few people participate? Why not then just make those days out of uniform days? These are the questions true men of Elder must consider. In my quest to seek answers surrounding the theme day crisis, my mission first took me to the library where only the most opinionated students reside. Inside, I found Aidan Corey ‘20 reading Hamlet, and I decided to ask him a few questions about his opinion of theme days. When asked about his feelings on theme days Aidan responded negatively: “Theme days are just pointless. Kids don’t actually do the theme because they are given the option to come in purple Friday clothes. We already have a day for that every week. In my opinion, students should be the ones to create the theme days and not the Elder staff. That way the themes are relevant and there is no excuse for not following the theme”. After hearing Aidan’s response, I could not help but agree. The theme days are pre-decided by Elder staff before the year starts instead of by students in organizations such as student council. If student council were allowed to create the themes then the days would be created by the students, for the students. More original theme days may inspire more participation. While I continued my search for answers, I discovered another intelligent student lurking Ethan Plagge in the library: Ethan Plagge ‘20. I asked him a few questions too, and thankfully he gave me consent to include his response in my piece. Ethan had the following to say on the theme day topic: “I understand why students don’t participate. Wearing purple Friday attire instead of the theme is comfortable. If someone wants people to follow the theme then they need to remove the ability to come in normal clothes. That way kids either participate or suffer in uniform; however, until teachers hand over control of deciding theme days, I say don’t remove the purple Friday alternative”. Ethan’s ideas made complete sense to me as well. It would not be reasonable to remove the purple Friday alternative until students are the ones creating the themes. Upon returning from my journey to the library, I had ample time to reflect on what I had discovered. There are indeed critical problems in the theme day system, and it would appear that there is a solution. Imagine an Elder where student council decided on the theme days at the beginning of the year. These students would create fun and original theme days to be passed on for future years to come. When the theme day rolls around, the day is promoted and no purple Friday alternative is allowed: forcing the students’ hands. They either come out of uniform following the theme or they don’t. When the theme days roll around, there is a large amount of participation and the problem is solved. Now that is a world I would like to live in, and I won’t even be here next year.
XFL Fans. (from nbcsports.com)
The XFL is back; but will it last this time? Lukas Marlman ‘21 Staff Writer
Many people either know about the XFL or are just confused about what the XFL even
is. The XFL is a professional American football league owned by Vince McMahon’s Alpha Entertainment. Yes, it’s the same Vince McMahon that owns the WWE. Vince first started the XFL in 2000 but the first game wasn’t played until 2001. On February 3rd, 2001 the opening game took place at Sam Boyd Stadium in Las Vegas, Nevada, which was less than one week after the NFL’s Super Bowl XXXV. The New Jersey Hitmen and the Las Vegas Outlaws were the first two teams to play an XFL game and the Outlaws came out with a 19-0 victory over the Hitmen. For it’s 2020 reboot, the XFL currently has eight teams; four in the West and four in the East. In the East are the New York Guardians, St. Louis BattleHawks, Tampa Bay Vipers, and the DC Defenders. The West includes Seattle Dragons, Los Angeles Wildcats, Houston Roughnecks, and the Dallas Renegades. While the original XFL began in 2000, it lasted only one season (10 games.) This was due to the poor planning and communication of the owners. Even though the first game pulled in 54 million viewers; the XFL didn’t hold up to expectations throughout the season. The whole concept was rushed too fast. McMahon proposed the XFL and made initial headlines, but he didn’t even have players, coaches, teams, stadiums, or support staff ready at all. The XFL officially went bankrupted due to his poor planning and poor management. McMahon promised to give the viewers “faster, more violent tackles, creative new rules, a brash attitude and scantily clad cheerleaders” in the XFL. If you want to see what the XFL’s major and severely different rules from any other football league were in 2001, be sure to check, xflnewshub.com or search the XFL’s rules in 2001. In May of 2018, Vince McMahon released a video of him stating that the XFL was coming back in 2020. McMahon held true to that statement because on Saturday, February 8th, 2020 the first XFL games were played after it’s nearly two-decades absence. To see the scores of these games and future games and scheduled games, just visit XFL.com. I think that the XFL back in 2001 was too much for its own good. There were too many different rule changes that had never been seen before, but the concept was good. If it was introduced a little differently and not rushed and hyped so much, then I think that it might have succeeded. The vision that McMahon had was great in my opinion, because the NFL is getting to the point where there are too many rules and they are taking the fun out of the game. While they say it’s for the players’ safety and health, they could take a whole different path and still keep the fun in the game. But we are here to talk about the XFL not the NFL. McMahon had the right idea, just not the best execution. However, with the reboot of the XFL for the 2020 season and seasons to come, McMahon hired many people that know about football, and they helped make the rules and made sure that the new league didn’t go too far to the extreme. One of these people is Oliver Luck, yes Andrew Luck’s father. Oliver Luck is the CEO/Commissioner of the XFL, while Vince McMahon is still the owner. I think that the changes that the XFL made are great because not only have they hired the right people, but they have taken their time to make the league work. They also have made great rule changes. For example, during the kickoffs, “the kicker kicks from the 30yard line and must kick the ball in the air and in play between the opponent’s 20-yard line and the end zone. The coverage team lines up on the return side 35-yard line and the return team lines up on the 30-yard line. Each team must have exactly three players outside the hash marks on both sides of the ball and cannot move until the ball is caught by the returner. Out of bounds kicks and kicks that fall short of the 20-yard line will result in an illegal procedure penalty, taking the ball all the way out to the kicking team’s 45-yard line. Players can move when the ball is touched by the returner or three seconds after the ball touches the ground (when the official waves his hand down).” According to xfl.com/rules. In my opinion, this kickoff rule change gives the game a different style and tempo. I think that it is a great way to keeping the players safe while still for the most part keeping the fun and “danger” in a kickoff. While the XFL folded after its first season in 2001, I think that the XFL will stick around longer than one season if they continue the way they started. With the rule changes they made from the 2001 season to 2020, the XFL has a great chance at sticking around for a long time.
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Faculty Features
Friday February 28, 2020
Who’s throwing the brutal bricks? Henry Mazza ‘21 Staff Writer
Elder’s disciplinary system has been
ever present throughout the halls of its castle. There has been no shortage of bricksheets, demerits, and even in some cases, further punishment. At the the lowest point of the discipline pyramid, I like to call it, is the bricksheet. The bricks are mainly used at the teacher’s discretion. The punishment can come from very simple acts or maybe from an elaborate prank in the classroom. Nonetheless, no one enjoys straining their wrist for 30 minutes, writing down useless verbiage. But, bricksheets do not just come in one level of difficulty. Teachers across the halls have been developing elaborate schemes to punish their students in ways which will give the instructors a grin. One teacher that adores the art of bricksheet giving is Mr. Bell, who has one of the quickest triggers of them all. I have witnessed first hand the handing out of bricksheets to many students. No one will ever find more joy in making a student cringe over a piece of paper than Mr. Bell. While he hands the bricksheets out, you will see him smiling ear to ear, soaking up pure joys from the punishment, yet it is never malicious. All recipients of a Bell Bricksheet rightfully deserve their penalty. For example, a student who shall remain nameless, *wink wink*, happened to write an inappropriate team name on the board during a review, and, in turn, received a bricksheet from Mr. Bell. Though the name got a good laugh out of the class, doing the crime means he/I had to do the time.
Turning the bricksheet in the next morning in homeroom, Mr. Bell announced to the corners of the earth that he has struck once again. Some teachers don’t give out just bricksheets, though. Some make the students pay for what they have done. In all of Elder, no teacher has more distressing bricksheets than Mrs. James. Since Mrs. James is a teacher of one of the most challenging subjects at Elder, she has access to vocabulary well of lengthened words that almost don’t seem real. I got to experience of these up close and personal after I fell victim to an alarm set on my phone in homeroom. This was by far the roughest and most taxing bricksheet ever conceived by man, or woman. Trying to fit words like “hydrocarbonate” and “tetramethylsilane” into the miniature boxes was near impossible. And, there weren’t just two words like this. As many huge words as possible were jammed into a sentence
until it was barely grammatically correct. If there is one bricksheet you never, ever, want to receive, it is one from Mrs. James. While most of the time, bricksheets are a onetime event to teach a kid a lesson; sometimes, bricksheet feuds break out. This is when the rare occurrence of a student actually eats bricksheets like they are breakfast while they don’t even faze him. This year, a famous bricksheet feud that has been taking place since the first semester is between Jimmy Kearns and Mr. Quatman. I am not in this class, yet I hear a substantial amount of the happenings that go on inside the closed doors of room 26. As the Joker once said, this is a classic case of “when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object.” The unstoppable force being Jimmy against the immovable object: Mr. Quatman. I had a chance to speak with Jimmy and ask him about what has been going down in the last couple months between him and Mr. Q. To start he said, “It’s all out of love, remember that.” I asked him some of the most ridiculous times he has been tagged with bricksheets from his foe, and he said, “One time, all I did was fart and I got two bricksheets. I mean c’mon it was not worth two bricksheets.” Honestly, I have to agree with him here. We are in an all-boys school and to assume that gas won’t slip out is an ignorant presumption. When I asked Jimmy if Mr. Quatman was even responsible enough to have to power to fling bricks, he said, “I mean he’s a teacher so, yeah, I can’t stop him, but he needs to give a justifiable reason why he’s giving me a punishment.” Although, I am sure the depth of this quarrel has roots deeper than what can be examined, Jimmy
has a good point that Mr. Q can become trigger happy at times. To make sure that each side of this had a voice, I stopped by Mr. Quatman’s room after school to see what he had to say about the situation as a whole. I started off by asking him what his strategy is regarding bricksheets and his favorite ways to give them out. He said, “Now, I start off by giving two bricksheets right away because one does not seem to be doing the trick. If they act up again that day, I’m now just going straight to demerits. My new favorite way to give them out is by making them write pages from the chapter they read, or didn’t read, the night before. This one has been seeming to work lately.” Then I got to the meat and potatoes. I asked what he was doing about the tug of war with Jimmy and he said, “One time Jimmy farted in class after I specified I didn’t want anyone to do that anymore. So, I gave him a bricksheet. Then, thinking to get back, he farted in the general area of my desk so I gave him another.” Apparently, events like this are not uncommon in Mr. Quatman’s classroom where students can take bricksheets like Rocky takes punches. Moral of the story: bricksheets are an active part of Elder disciplinary system and it works on most, but not all.
Friday February 28, 2020
Faculty Features 5
Some faculty members are hiding super powers Jake Byrne ‘20 Staff Writer
As you’ve spent time in your classes
throughout the years, you’ve probably picked up on many of your teacher’s tendencies or commonly used phrases. But depending on the teachers you have had, you might have noticed that some of your teachers are unusually talented at frustratingly difficult tasks (such as drawing or writing with a computer mouse) or have mildly unusual talents (such as fixing baseball gloves). Yes, I’m talking about Mr. Louis and Mr. Boeing, who will henceforth be referred to as “The Glove Doctor” in this article. To put it simply, Mr. Louis is absurdly good at drawing with his mouse. To those who have never tried to draw or write something with a mouse or with their touchpad, this skill may not seem worthy of the “superpower” moniker, but if you’ve ever tried to write a sentence with a mouse you are fully aware of how impressive Mr. Louis neatness is. It is difficult to describe how hard writing with a mouse/touchpad is, so if you’ve never tried writing a with one, give it a try. It’ll likely take you about twenty seconds
“Mr. Roush is really good, but Mr. Louis is the Chief of Digital Penmanship.”
-Nick Hunter and Mike Connolly
to write a single word and the odds of anybody being able to read that word are infinitesimal. Not only is Mr. Louis’ skillfulness with his mouse impressive to witness, it is quite helpful for students. Since Mr. Louis’ writing on the computer is neater than most people’s actual handwriting, it takes away the hassle of having to struggle to read what a teacher is writing on the board. In addition, Mr. Louis’ masterfulness extends beyond just writing neatly with a mouse. He navigates SMART
But could Mr. Louis control his mouse while wearing a baseball glove?
Notebook with swiftness and grace, accesses rulers or protractors in seconds, and changes the color of his pen in the blink of an eye. Senior Luke Hastings had Mr. Louis freshman year for geometry and said “I noticed how good he was drawing with his mouse immediately” and that he was “taken aback”. However, I have heard from some students that Mr. Roush is
pretty dexterous and capable of giving Mr. Louis a run for his money as Chief of Digital Penmanship. I asked seniors Nick Hunter and Mike Connolly, who both had Mr. Louis and Mr. Roush, about these claims, they agreed that “Mr. Roush is really good, but Mr. Louis is the Chief of Digital Penmanship.” Mr. Louis’ meticulousness while drawing with his mouse is a sight to behold and amazes his geometry students each year. A lesser known skill possessed by a faculty member is Mr. Boeing’s knack for fixing and restringing baseball gloves, earning him the nickname “Glove Doctor”. Of course, everybody is familiar with Mr. Boeing’s assertion that “the Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell”, but not everybody is aware of his ability to repair baseball gloves. According to members of the baseball team, the Mr. Boeing is a master at his craft and has been fixing baseball gloves for quite some time. Senior Mike Connolly says that has gotten his mitt restrung by the Glove Doctor and plans to go back to Mr. Boeing again before the start of the season. Mike said that “Mr. Boeing is very good at it and that whenever an Elder baseball player needs a glove restrung they go to him.” These two aren’t the only teachers that have “superpowers” however. Others include Mr. Rogers’ ability to teach his Graphic Design class with his eyes closed 80% of the time and how good Mr. Currin is at doing math in his head.
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Cooper Mullen Nicholas Hunter ‘20 Staff Writer
At Elder this year, there have been sev-
eral athletes who have made the decision to carry on their athletic career in college. Everyone knows about the big commits like Royer, James, and Kandra, but some at Elder might not know about a sleeper D1 commit who has dedicated countless hours of his life to doing what people do every day: just a little faster. Also known as the “king of the simps”, Cooper Mullen is the face of cross country at Elder and for good reason. His fast times have allowed him fantastic opportunities at the high school level; one of which being a state appearance this past year. His successes have allowed him to fulfill his long-term goal of running in college, and next year you
Student Features will be able to find him running at Ohio University. Recently, I had the opportunity to sit down with Cooper and discuss his future in running at Elder and beyond. First and foremost, I asked Cooper about the upcoming track season and his hopes. He said his “ultimate goal would be to crack Elder’s one-mile record of 4:16”. He is currently running a 4:24, so he will need to drop 8-seconds this season in order to do so. His inspiration for this goal was clearly his dad who currently has the record for the two-mile at Elder. Besides his personal goals, Cooper also talked about the track team as a whole this season. When asked about some standout individuals, Cooper responded that “Kan-
dra will dominate throwing this year, Ammon will dominate the jumping, and the long-distance crew is always strong”. Based on Cooper’s answers, I feel it is safe to assume the track team will at minimum be decent this year. Absent from that list, however, was fellow runner Mark Schweinberg. Mark is the yin to Cooper’s yang. The two have historically been close teammates as well as business partners within their self-made lawn care company called Mullenberg. It appears that this close friendship has walked a thin line as of late due to Mark’s decision to quit the track team his senior year. Cooper had a strong opinion on this topic and said sternly about Mark that “you don’t just run for years and quit your senior year. You just don’t”. While this statement holds value and appears highly critical, Cooper made it clear that he still possessed undeniable love for his partner. With two aspects of Cooper’s current life covered, there was only college to discuss. It is always a big decision choosing a college and the decision to compete at a further level is not for the faint of heart. Cooper did not appear intimidated by the decision and said that his decision was made in his best interest: “College is
Stowe-away with the Reds Carmine Domenicone, Jr. ‘20 Co-Editor in Chief
Most students have a typical job during
their high school years that is thought of more as a burden rather than a perk. However, senior Gabe Stowe has a job that many would be very lucky to have. Stowe will begin his duties as the Cincinnati Reds bat boy for the third year starting this spring. He started working at the end of his sophomore year and has been a busy man ever since. The Stowe family has had a long-standing history with the Reds organization, dating back to his grandfather, Bernie Stowe. His dad, Eric, took over the role of clubhouse manager after the death of Bernie in 2016. His brothers Luke and Noah both also work for the team. Luke started out as a bat boy just like Gabe, but now works as an assistant to their dad in the clubhouse. Noah works with the suites as a runner. With that being said, its pretty self-explanatory how Gabe landed the job. Despite the experience being around professional athletes every day, when it comes down to working, it’s by no means easy. “Before the game, I get to the stadium and set up the bench and dugout. I help
Gabe flexing with Joey Votto. (photo provided)
clean lockers, do laundry, clean shoes, and shag balls during batting practice. I also do other individual stuff for the players with whatever they want or tell me to do. Then I get ready for the game,” said Stowe. During the game, his head is always on a swivel. He went on to explain the details saying, “Batboy during the game consist of getting foul balls, keeping the umpire stocked up with balls/drinks, keeping the on-deck circle clean and filled with pine tar and weights, and getting bats.” He added, “During the game I try to
keep the home plate umpire happy so he gives us a few calls.” After the completion of the game he told me he begins the cleaning process. “I first clean the dugout and bullpen, then head into the clubhouse to clean shoes and lockers, do laundry, and hang the stuff back up for the next day,” told Stowe. Safe to say that it’s quite a demanding job, yet rewarding at the same time. Some days he’s down at the ballpark from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed.
Friday February 28, 2020
Schweinberg and Mullen
whatever you make it out to be. It can be fun, productive, or neither of those two at all depending on what your work ethic and attitude is like. I believe Ohio University offers me a great opportunity to be able to succeed academically, socially, and in the world of running.” He is looking to study something business related next year. Make sure to make it out to a track meet this season in order to watch the team and Cooper compete. They are usually pretty entertaining stuff. Going on three years now, he’s had some good memories down at the ballpark. He told me his favorite memory was wearing all the different jerseys in honor of the Reds’ 150th year as an organization last season. He told me his favorite uniform was undoubtably the grey cutoffs. Joey Votto came up to him one game they were wearing them and said, “Gabe let’s flex together.” With some big moves made this offseason, the Reds are shaping up to be a real threat in the NL Central this season. Hopefully with a strong-armed staff and a power threat offense, there will be some more memories to be made. Curious to see if Stowe was interested in continuing to work for the Reds when he gets older, I asked him what aspirations he had for the future. “I don’t know honestly. I’ll definitely be working there during college and probably work two jobs fresh out of college. I’m hoping to get that “real job” during the day and keep the Reds job at night.” Aside from Stowe’s work for the Reds, he has been a part of Elder’s golf team all four years and helped them make a push for state the past two. His hard work on and off the field is a commitment and he’ll probably go down in the history books as having “the coolest job at Elder.”
Friday February 28, 2020
Student Features 7
A black belt among us? Gus Middendorf ‘21 Staff Writer
The sacred art of karate dates its origins
hundreds of years ago; however, it is alive and well at Elder High School. In the process of investigating rumors of a blackbelt, I interviewed several belt-wearing karate practitioners and sought to learn just how well our school is trained in the martial arts. During my quest to find a certified black belt, I first came across senior Ryan Hill, who claimed a yellow belt, the second lowest honor in the system. “Like everyone else, I went to the Glenway Academy of Kung-Fu and Tai-Chi. I was about eight and went for a few weeks… until I accidentally kicked my teacher in the head; that pretty much ended the classes for me.” After talking with this rogue warrior, I began to feel his martial prowess, even though it was only that of a weak, yellow belt. My journey continued, then, with junior Jake Stiens. Meeting Stiens, I instantly felt his much stronger karate-fighting power, as he was awarded the honor of a green belt, two steps higher than Hill’s yellow. He was a strong believer in the meditative aspects of karate, claiming that karate should be used for personal growth and balance, not destruction. Reflecting this belief, his signature move was what he called the “crane kick pose,” popularized by the 1984 classic The Karate Kid. Despite his apparent mastery of the pose, I still doubted that it was a real karate stance. Seeing these two supposed karateka being unsure of their skills, I began to hesitate that Elder contained any true
warriors. My worries were halted, though, when I was told that a black belt did indeed walk these halls: Nick Hunter. To verify this claim, I asked the man directly, approaching him with great carefulness as he was said to be able to chop down trees with his bare hands. After talking to him, though, I realized I had failed my test. “Technically I’m not a real black belt, but when I was 12, I broke a piece of wood so they gave me one.” This terrible realization was devastating, crushing my dream of finding a karate master, as it seemed that almost all of these karate stars took these classes when they were children as some kind of a “cheaper day-care”, as Hunter called it. My hopes of finding a real martial artist gone, I concluded that all karate was a horrible lie, designed to give parents a place to stuff their kids for a few hours a week. However, in my darkest moment, I found a real karate master, senior Kyle Gutzwiller. Kyle was a true martial
artist, enrolled in the prestigious Cincinnati Martial Arts Club and awarded with a legitimate and certified red belt, which laid only two steps below the treasured black belt. When asked if he had any signature moves, Kyle told me of his experience with the “tornado kick”, a complex motion, which he describes as a “powerful spinning kick designed to confuse the opponent.” Bearing witness to true mastery of the sport, I now realized that, despite the gross mockery that many students pass as true karate, there is at least one real warrior here at Elder High School. We would have to wait for and wish luck to our karate master to achieve the highest honor.
Kung-fu photos (clockwise)
Nick Hunter (notorious black belt); Jacob Stiens demonstrates his improvised “crane kick”; Glenway’s finest institution of karate; Ryan Hill, face of a warrior. (Glenway Kung-fu photo by googlemaps; others by Gus Middendorf ‘21)
8
Sports
Friday February 28, 2020
Elder to Thomas More Express Michael Connolly ‘20 Staff Writer
Elder student athletes have a plethora
of different universities where they can continue their athletic careers. Simply to name a few, there are currently students committed to Ohio State, Louisville, Ohio University, Indianapolis University, and Wabash Valley CC. However, one college seems to stand above the rest when it comes to Elder athletes. That college, is the newly named Thomas More University. Thomas More is located in Northern Kentucky, the perfect place to #stayhome for athletes in the Cincinnati area. Recently Thomas More moved to the NAIA level of colleges, meaning they could provide athletes with scholarships besides academics. Currently, Elder has two baseball players and one golfer committed to the college, but rumors are beginning to swirl that they’re looking for a lot more. Graduate of 2019, Michael Newsom, even went as far to turn down the top business program at UC to continue his dream at Thomas More. Naturally, I inquired as to why he made this decision and how it has gone for him so far. “I chose TMU because it was the best option for me and my family. It was also my best option to come in and play right away. That was a big factor in playing baseball here.” When asked about his excitement on the possibility of playing with some of
his former teammates, Newsom said, “I think it’s so cool that I get to play every day with guys I’ve played with before and been around at Elder. I’m even more excited to play with the guys coming next year because we had such a great time over the past couple of years playing together.” This excitement is not only felt with players on the team though, but also with players that are ready to take the next step and join the team next year. Senior
Zach Dugan
baseball players Mychal Grogan and Zach Dugan have both committed to take their athletics abilities to the Saints next year. I asked them both what about the program captured their attention compared to other schools. Grogan responded by saying, I chose Thomas More over some of the other schools because they had the perfect fit for me. Just knowing the coach and seeing his plan for me, and knowing I could make an impact right away.” Dugan had a similar response, but first focused on the academic aspect of the university compared to the athletic aspect only. “From an academic standpoint, I feel like TMU is the perfect fit. It’s not too big, it’s not too small. You are able to develop close relationships with the professors at TMU because class sizes only range from 35-70 kids.” When Zach decided to discuss the university from a baseball standpoint, his answer connected back to what he has been taught at Elder so far. “A lot of people from Elder go to TMU to play because they know that it’s been successful for many kids there. They have that old school philosophy kind of like Elder and win a lot of games because of that philosophy.” Going to a school with a lot of familiar faces will definitely help, as they can help “show people the ropes”, and truly “define the leadership positions early in the season”, according to Grogan.
Michael Newsom
This was one of the things many brought up between all of the players both attending and planning on attending. The atmosphere between Elder the TMU is extremely similar, and it is something that many of the student athletes feel extremely comforted by. Regardless, the athletes have the ability to continue their dream at a school they love, and in the words of Zach Dugan, “It’s simply the best fit.”
Keyes’ journey to the Golden Gophers Mason Berger ‘20 Co-Editor in Chief
There have been many student-athletes
throughout Elder’s history that have worked hard and battled adversity to earn their spot on the field or onto a college roster, but not many guys have worked harder than Connor Keyes. Keyes (Butch), who has accepted a preferred walk on offer to the University of Minnesota, has had to earn his way into his current position every step of the way. His two older brothers both attended St. Xavier, yet, Connor still ended up
Keyes played with an intensity and passion that is hard to match. (photo from Kevin Ludwig, EHSports.com)
choosing the good side and coming to Elder. “I felt like I’d fit in better at Elder,” said Keyes on his decision. In his junior season, Connor played linebacker, and played in all ten regular season games. “It was my first year ever playing middle linebacker, so I really had to focus and learn that side of the ball since the middle linebacker runs the defense,” said Butch. Unfortunately, he broke his finger in week eight, and the injury ended up requiring surgery, and he was unable to play in the 2018 OHSAA playoffs. “We thought it was just jammed so I played the following two weeks as well, but we found out my finger was badly broken and had to get surgery,” said Keyes on his injury. He was not very highly recruited after his junior season, but he did still pick up a couple of scholarship offers from Division II colleges. He planned on attending several recruiting camps across the region during the spring and summer of 2019, but pulled his hamstring multiple times, which in turn kept him out of any sort of running. “I was only able to go to one camp, and that was the Minnesota camp.” Butch stood out in this camp, receiving complements from the linebackers coach/defensive coordinator, Coach Rossi about his performance. After this, Connor went back up to Minnesota to train with his cousin, Kyle Rudolph. He was to fly out on Sunday, but was throwing up a little bit the Friday and Saturday prior to his departure. Connor didn’t want to back out of his trip on the last minute, so he decided to battle through the sickness and fly up to Minnesota. “Getting off the plane was the worst it felt, and I could hardly walk to Kyle’s car. But I still tried to play it off not wanting anyone to think I’m a coward for having a stomach ache. My dad did say, ‘don’t go up there complaining about your stom-
ach’,” said Butch. The next morning, Connor still felt terrible and got sick many times that morning alone. Kyle set up an appointment with the Vikings team doctor, and the doctor told him he had a ruptured appendix which had been leaking for days. He was supposed to be out of the hospital after surgery within a couple of days, but more and more complications kept happening, and Connor stayed in the hospital for a total of fifteen days. “The fourth day I was there they shoved a tube through my nostril, through my throat, and into my stomach to suck out stuff inside of me.” Butch wasn’t able to eat or drink anything for those fifteen days in the hospital other than being hooked up to an IV. He lost thirty pounds over that two weeks and a day period. “Even days and weeks after I got out of the hospital my stomach still hurt,” said Keyes. He wasn’t cleared to lift for six weeks after he got out of the hospital, and missed the entirety of camp and the majority of double practice days in the offseason. By week one, however, he was back on the field, but not feeling 100%, “First couple
of games, the coaches were holding me back from playing because of my surgery and they wanted me to be healthy for the full season,” “The first game of the year, I felt and was super slow so I was extremely mad and started running sprints up hills in my neighborhood on Sundays after the first few games of the year,” said Keyes. In week four of the regular season, Connor was asked to switch from linebacker to defensive end, which he gladly accepted. The rest speaks for itself, as Connor was a First Team All-GCL selection, and was the defensive lineman of the year for the Panthers. “I knew going into the season we would have a great team. It was a great team to be a part of and it’s a shame it had to end up as State Runner-Up,” said Butch. Connor picked up one Division I scholarship offer from the Virginia Military Institute in the middle of the regular season, and that would be his lone offer from a D-1 school. On January 15th, Connor received a preferred walk on offer from Minnesota, and committed two days later to the Gold-
Friday February 28, 2020
Sports 9
March Madness
Fickell decides to stay home
As we begin to near the end of February,
head coach at the University of Cincinnati. As a head coach, Fickell has a 32-20 record, along with back to back 11-win seasons. He announced his return via twitter on February 10th by tweeting a video of his football team with the caption, “Looking forward to more of this in 2020! Who’s with us?” There were several rumors going around about him leaving the Bearcats and joining Michigan State as the head coach. Mark Dantonio, previous head football coach at Michigan State, suggested Fickell to the program after announcing his retirement. Fickell met with them on February 9th, and everyone believed he would be receiving and accepting an offer from Michigan State on this day. However, the next day Fickell met with the new athletic director at the University of Cincinnati and ultimately decided on staying with the Bearcats. In an interview with Cincinnait.com, Fickell said that the culture around UC played a large part in his decision. He said that the fans and the players he has are both something special. The culture at Michigan State is not the same right now because of all the recent controversies and allegations toward the athletic department there. Most of these allegations are sexual assault cases towards athletes, including the Larry Nassar scandal. Also, Fickell said his decision was partly “selfish.” He said that because of his kids’ ages and the relationships Coach Luke Fickell likes what he’s got at UC.(bizjournals) they’ve built staying here made more sense. He did not want to continue to move his family around from place to place. Cincinnati is now home to him, and he wants it to stay this way. Fickell’s decision is very big news for both the Bearcats’ football team and their fanbase. Finding a new head coach is never an easy job for any team. A job search costs a lot of money, time, and resources. Fickell has completely turned the Cincinnati football program around. Being a fan myself, I can say it is nice to finally have a good sports team in Cincinnati. Also, if Fickell would have left this would mean that many recruits may have decommitted. He plays a big part in the recruiting process. Players get the opportunity to build a relationship with him, so his departure would most likely result in their departure as well. I am very excited with Fickell’s decision and cannot wait to watch him continue to lead the Bearcats to many successful seasons. Personally, I believe he will be staying here for the remainder of his coaching career. He has ended the last two seasons on big bowl wins, and I think it will only get better from here. There are at least 15 starters from last year’s team that will be returning. Also, his 2020 recruiting class is the best in school history, along with the highest rated recruit UC football has ever had (including local standout Evan Prater from Wyoming). Fickell has brought in a surplus of talent. I predict next year’s Bearcats will have one of their best seasons ever. The future is very bright for the Bearcats with Luke Fickell as head coach.
Nicholas Seger ‘20 Senior Staff Writer
Dakota Postel ‘20 Staff Writer
and the beginning of March, one of the most exciting times of the year comes upon us; MARCH MADNESS! This years’ season of NCAA basketball has been quite interesting so far, and there have been a fair share of shockers and upsets. Andy Katz, a college basketball analyst for the Big Ten Network, has already filled out his bracket, on the predicted seeds of teams that he thinks will be going to the dance this coming month. In his bracket, two new teams are now present at the number one seed, and both of them have never been No. 1 seeds before. The Baylor Bears and the San Diego State Aztecs have made their way into Katz’s No. 1 seed prediction. These two teams have had a very impressive season so far, with Baylor at ranked #1 in the Big 12 currently and San Diego State sitting at #1 as well in the Mountain West Conference. Neither of these teams have ever entered March Madness as the top ranked seed, and it will be interesting to see if they can make it happen this year. The other two teams, who are more familiar with the top seeds, are the Kansas
San Diego State
en Gophers. He said this about his experience on campus at Minnesota, “What I really loved was Coach Fleck brought me into his office and just talked about their culture, and I felt like Minnesota would be a great fit for me.” Looking back on his time in the purple and white, Connor will forever cherish the experience of playing in the Pit. “There isn’t one high school in the country that has a stadium like ours, and I’ll also cherish playing with my brothers and all the coaches who were always there for me on and off the field.” Connor has a mentality that is second to none, and he will be bringing his killer mentality with him when he heads up to Minnesota. “Make the most of it! Never give up and work hard. I’ve learned over my years at Elder that hard work and patience will get you to accomplish things small-minded people don’t think you could ever do,” said Connor. I have personally known Connor since the third grade, and he has been and always will be a great friend to me. I have witnessed first-hand the intensity and passion that he brings to football and lifting, and I have witnessed the positivity and happiness that he has at school every day. Everybody notices it. Nobody, and I mean nobody, has worked harder to achieve their goals than Connor Keyes. You can take that to the bank. Minnesota is getting their diamond in the rough. You can take that to the bank, too.
As announced several weeks ago, Luke Fickell will be returning for his fourth season as
Iowa Hawkeyes
Jayhawks and the Gonzaga Bulldogs. Kansas has been seeded at No. 1 fourteen times, and has not been seeded lower than four since 2000! The Bulldogs on the other hand have been in the spotlight since they landed the top seed in 2013 for the first time, then did it again in 2017 and 2019. Now to step away from the wellknown powerhouses, there are plenty of teams who are making their way up the rankings and the seed line. Among some of those teams is the Iowa Hawkeyes. They were ranked at 33rd, which is a 9 seed, on January 14th, but jumped to a 4 seed after a hot streak, beating Northwestern, Michigan, and Rutgers. Other than Iowa, some additional “on the rise” teams are Houston, Florida, Marquette, Arizona, and Florida State. In Katz’s projected bracket, the Big Ten, as of now, has the most teams with 11 of them projected to make an appearance in the dance. After that, the ACC, Big 12, Big East, Pac-12, and the SEC are projected to have five teams a piece in the tournament. This season has been a very interesting one so far, and I really believe that there is not a team who is much more superior than the others. As you know, March Madness is well known for it’s upsets, so anything can change in one shot, foul, or block.
Jeffrey Wolber Elder’s #1 Super Fan is Back!!!
Lukas Marlman ‘21 Staff Writer
I can personally say that Jeffrey is a
dedicated man to Elder’s sport teams. I remember just this past football season seeing him at the Elder football games, and when we would run back to the grotto after the game to pray he would be there handing out high fives and just being cheerful to be there.
While I’m sure most of you have heard about Jeffrey’s condition and how he was at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital due to his spina bifida and also because he is battling a respiratory infection. I am happy to write that in a tweet from Gregory L Wolber, “Free at last free at last thank God almighty free at last from bed and oxygen mask. Thanks for all your prayers” Jeffrey is the strongest man and strongest Elder High School fan out there! While Jeffrey did spend two and a half weeks fighting intensely in the ICU at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital, he re-entered his spot on the sidelines on Saturday February 22nd, as the basketball team took on the Anderson Redskins. Most and if not all of the student in the cheering section was wearing the “Jeffrey Strong” t-shirts as Jeffrey took his place on the sidelines. In an interview with WCPO Sam Harmeyer ’20 said, “It also goes to show just how big a role Jeffrey plays in this part of the community.” When Jeffrey wasn’t at the Elder vs. St. Xavier game on Friday January 31st people noticed and were wondering were he was. That was Jeffrey’s first game he’s missed in an extremely long time. But when Jeffrey made his great comeback from the hospital fans cheered as he entered. Greg Wolber, Jeffrey’s father had a statement to make, “The support Elder has given us, Elder Nation, and just complete strangers that know Jeffrey, it’s hard to
explain. It’s hard to explain. It’s just unbelievable the prayers and support.” The Elder nation prayed hard for Jeffrey’s return and for his well-being, and it paid off! The Wolber family said they are thankful that Jeffrey is better, and they’re happy to get back to normal. As the Wolber family is returning back to normal so is the Elder community, we got our #1 fan back. With Jeffrey at the game the Panthers were able to secure a victory of the Redskins with a score of 65 - 43. While Elder has its community and fans its just not the same if Jeffrey isn’t there. Adam Duwel ’21 tweeted, “I’ve had hundreds of thousands of Elder Fans watch games from all around the globe. But to know that this one fan, was able to watch the game is more important than all the other fans combined!”
Elder Superfan Jeffrey Wolber:
(top left) in the hospital (@wolber_l on twitter) and (above) on football field with his favorite team (Jake Ryle twitter)
10
Friday February 28, 2020
Features
Maslow’s Army explains their mission to Elder Jason Thomas ‘20 Staff Writer
A few weeks ago, Samuel and Susan
Landis, co-founders of Maslow’s Army, came to talk about their nonprofit organization that benefits the homeless of Cincinnati. During the presentation, students were able to hear their personal stories about their experiences with being homeless, and how they took what they learned from their rough situation to make something positive. The mission of Maslow’s Army is to equip the homeless of Cincinnati with the tools necessary to become productive members of society. Maslow’s Army primarily does this through their Basic Needs Outreaches. These events take place on Fridays from 12:30 to 1:00 and Sundays from 12:00 to 1:30. The Friday outreaches are hosted at The Hamilton County Library sidewalk at 800 Vine Street, and provide bagged lunches to the homeless with the help of Our Daily Bread, a soup kitchen and social center located in the Over-the-Rhine neighborhood. The Sunday outreaches are more of an event, as they are popular with volunteers who desire to help the community and experience what Maslow’s Army does first hand. These outreaches are hosted at the Hamilton County Justice Center Plaza located at 1000 Sycamore Street, where volunteers provide free La Rosa’s pizza, bottled water, fruit, dessert, hygiene items, and haircuts to those in need. Items such as clothing, and hygiene products can also be donated during Sunday outreaches. These donations are collected at the outreach location from 11:00 am to 12:00. The collection is followed by the serving
of the homeless, which takes place from 12:00 to 1:30. To volunteer, simply show up at 11:30 on either day to help set up and serve. Questions about volunteering can be sent to info@maslowsarmy.org. Donations can also be made at their website, https://maslowsarmy.org/. Besides distributing food and other useful products, Maslow’s Army also provides other services such as peer support, navigation specialists, and shuttle services to transport the homeless to emergency shelters. The organization also came out with a resource guide for the homeless last year, which included places where they can receive free food, shelter, education, and help from addiction. Many people have contributed a lot to Maslow’s Army, including Trey Hopkins, an offensive lineman for the Cincinnati Bengals. Growing up in Houston Texas, Trey and his grandmother would pass out care packages to those experiencing homelessness in Houston. Elder also regularly contributes volunteers to the Sunday outreach with the help of Mr. Nugent, who I got the opportunity to talk to about the experience of volunteering at Maslow’s. I asked about the interactions between the volunteers
Sam and Susan at Sunday Outreach. (image from maslowsarmy.org)
and the homeless, to which he replied “It’s a unique experience because you get to actually hand them the food rather than preparing it and having it shipped to them. You can sense the amount of gratitude they have by seeing how they eagerly eat the food and how much they need it. It’s a very fulfilling experience that makes you feel as if you’re making a difference.” He went on to talk about Elder’s involvement and how we helped Samuel and Susan with funding the organization. “They’re very grateful for us. Whenever the purple shows up, they’re excited. There will be multiple schools there volunteering and everyone will still cheer for Elder.” Mr. Nugent said that there are some challenges when it comes to being downtown, but 95% of Elder students volunteering at Maslow’s. the people that come through have (image from wcpo.com)
positive attitudes. Basically, as long as you wear the purple, they’ll recognize you as Elder and give you a warm welcome. The goal of Maslow’s army is to not only to help the homeless become productive members of society, but to also show that homelessness is not an identity, but a situation. Through their efforts, Sam and Susan worked their way out of their situations and have given back to those who are currently in the same situation that they were once in. They have generated a community that makes the homeless feel welcomed and safe amongst one another. Maslow’s Army also provides an opportunity for volunteers to expand their worldview, and get to better know what it means to be homeless through hands on work and experience.
Friday February 28, 2020
Features 11
Elder’s
rooftop pool Carmine Domenicone ‘20 Co-Editor in Chief
“Seeing is not always believing.”
– Martin Luther King Jr.
These famous words spoken by King
himself are the prime message the upperclassmen here at Elder are trying to get across to the freshmen, or as some like to call them, the “non-believers.” History of the long-standing pool on the roof dates back to the early 1920’s when Elder was first established. With over a hundred years of wear and tear from being exposed to harsh weather at such a high altitude, the students have made efforts to raise money for renovations over the years to keep it in business. Why freshmen year in and year out can’t seem to wrap their heads around the concept is mind boggling. It’s as true as true can be and a staple of Elder’s historic school building that has no right to be doubted. Senior Frank Jett is a frequent user of the pool and had this to say to the haters: “IT’S 100% REAL. The price of admission is quite high, yet the reward is great. Taking laps helps me calm down after my long nap in physiology. If anyone doubts my creditability, I’d be more than willing to meet them in their sixth period class, soaking wet in my Panther head speedo.” I also got a chance to catch up with Mr. Bill who is well known for his sense of omniscience regarding traditions held here at Elder. I told him there have been
Surely no one can doubt the existence of the rooftop pool following the release of this unretouched photograph.
rumors going around that the pool doesn’t exist and many underclassmen are doubting its long-standing legacy. He responded, “WHAT RUMORS? The pool has been a cornerstone ever since Elder opened in 1922.” He told me it was originally designed just for the priests, but has since opened its doors to all students and faculty. He went on to tell me that the original design of the building was only two stories and when the third
Clues as to the true existence of the Elder Pool can be found around campus in the most unlikely places. (again, this is not photoshopped)
story was added on, the high dive had to be removed because the pool was too shallow. Who manages and lifeguards the pool you may ask? According to my sources, Ms. Schad has the most experience managing pools and per Mr. Bill, “she has lent her training skills to the entire faculty.” Now, everyone has probably made a visit up to the help desk in their time spent here at Elder, but what many fail to notice are the life preservers that hang directly behind Mr. Horvath’s desk. “Little known fact, it’s not called the help desk for nothing. Before heading up to the pool, each faculty member and student needs to check in at the help desk to pick up their board approved life preserver,” said Mr. Bill. When making the trek up to roof, however, it’s essential you bring a personal towel because there’s nothing worse than sitting their dripping wet for the rest
of the day in class…just ask Mr. Kreimer about his leaks in the ceiling back in ’82. While the pool is a unique feature, many people forget about the hot tub that spans the length and width of the fifth floor tower. When speaking to Mr. Bill, he told me, “there’s nothing better than the sight of Coach James’ cannonball from the fifth floor hot tub into the pool down below.” The hot tub is a big hit for the trainers. Many times, they will send injured athletes up to the roof to get a 30-minute hot tub session in to help with recovery. After reading all this and hearing from a creditable source like Mr. Bill, I’m not sure how you can still doubt its existence. The pool is open from the start of first period until the end of the day, if you’re interested feel free to contact Mr. Bill to get a pass. Swim at your own risk.
12
Arts & Entertainment
Lil Dicky’s DAVE to premiere in March Nicholas Seger ‘20 Staff Writer
Since the release of his hit album Profes-
sional Rapper in 2015, Lil Dicky has been fairly quiet. He has blessed his fans with a couple hit songs in recent years (Earth and Freaky Friday), but his consistency has not been where it used to be. However, Lil Dicky announced via Instagram that 2020 will be a completely different year for him. He will be releasing an album and his very own TV show. It will be titled DAVE because Lil Dicky’s real name is Dave Burd. Although a release date has not been set for his album, his show will be premiering sometime in March on FX Networks. The executive producers for the show are Kevin Hart and Scooter Braun. Hart is a huge fan of the rapper and is glad to be a part of the production. Hart has his own company called HartBeat Productions. He has produced the movie Night School and is in the process of producing Fatherhood. Braun is a longtime friend who has worked with Dicky several times before as a music manager. He also manages some of the best musicians in the game such as Ariana Grande, Kanye West, and Usher. The co-stars alongside Dicky for the show will be Taylor Misiak, Andrew Santino, GaTa, Travis Bennett and Christine Ko. Misiak has worked with Lil Dicky in his famous music video, Pillow Talking, which has over 37 million views. Santino is an actor and a standup comedian, like Dicky was prior to becoming a rapper. GaTa is one of Dicky’s closest and most
trusted friends. Bennett, also known as Taco, is a famous actor writer and actor. Last, Ko is an actor who is best known for her role in the sitcom The Great Indoors. All of these co-stars have expressed how excited they are to be a part of this project. Also, the show will be featuring some big-name stars like Justin Bieber, YG, and Kourtney Kardashian. The show itself is a semi-autobiographical fictional series about Lil Dicky. The episodes of this comedy will be about 30 minutes long. The plot is centered around a man in his late twenties who is certain he will become one of the greatest rappers of all time. He needs to convince his closest friends of his destiny, so he can have some help in accomplishing this. The show follows the rapper through his everyday life, and his eventual rise to fame. Personally, I am the biggest Lil Dicky fan out there. I am thrilled for his new album and excited for the release of the show. I have been a fan for several years
Friday February 28, 2020
Big winners at the 2020 Oscars Jake Byrne ‘20 Staff Writer
Many fantastic movies have been
released in the past year. Some of the most critically acclaimed films include 1917, Parasite, Joker, Once upon a time…in Hollywood, The Irishman, Knives Out, and Marriage Story. Each of these films was nominated for an Oscar and most of them received multiple nominations, but which films brought home the most hardware from the 2020 Oscars? Parasite was the clear winner from the 2020 Oscars; it brought home four awards (the most out of any movie) including Best Picture, making it the first non-English film to ever win Best Picture at the Oscars. Bong Joon Ho also won Best Director for his crucial role in producing Parasite. Parasite received high scores from many review websites including a 99% fresh on Rotten Toma-
Lil Dicky (from billboard.com)
and am curious to see more of Dicky’s everyday experiences in this new show. Not many rappers, or all celebrities for that matter, show their fans who they truly are, but Lil Dicky is doing exactly this. He is proving yet again how versatile he is. The man is a comedian, rapper, and now an actor too. I believe Dicky has mastered comedy and the rap game, and now we all will get to see what kind of actor he is.
Friday February 28, 2020
Arts & Entertainment 13
Beyond Friday nights The Elder band does much more than just sporting events Thomas Peters ‘20 Staff Writer
Loudly and proudly, the Elder marching
The epic 1917 won three Oscars.
toes. Although Parasite enjoyed the most success at the Oscars, plenty of other movies received attention as well. 1917 won three Oscars including Best Achievement in Cinematography, Best Achievement in Visual Effects, and Best Achievement in Sound Mixing. 1917 also received nominations for Best Picture among many others, and Sam Mendes received a nomination for Best Director. Although 1917 didn’t win as many awards as many thought it would, I personally loved the movie and highly recommend seeing it. Joaquin Phoenix won Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role for his part in Joker, and Brad Pitt won Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role for his part in Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood. The Irishman failed to win any Oscars but received nominations for a whopping ten awards including Best Picture. In addition, the murder-mystery film Knives Out did not win the Oscar for its lone nomination of Best Original Screenplay. Toy Story 4 won the Oscar for Best Animated Film of the year. Toy Story 4 was a great film and elicited a strong feeling of nostalgia. I loved Toy Story 4 and appreciate how the series hasn’t decreased in quality as it has progressed. Also, former Bengal player Matthew Cherry’s video Hair Love won the Oscar for Best Animated Short Film. The 2020 Oscars certainly had some its fair shar of “snubs”, which is inevitable when so many worthy movies are nominated for the same awards. Based off of my personal opinions and what I’ve garnered about each movie from the internet, each Oscar, most notably Best Picture, was given to the most deserving nomination.
band plays an essential role in the Friday night experiences at The Pit during football season. Everyone in the stadium notices their presence, and everyone save the visiting team appreciates it. For years, the band has helped fans increase their excitement, enjoy their celebrations, and rally behind the Panthers on the field, as well as provide fitting ambience in between plays to keep the crowd invested. But what does the band do in the offseason? Besides football and basketball games, what do the forty-ish members of the band practice for during band class? To find answers, I followed the musical river to its source, band members themselves. After four years at Elder, I have come to know a few band members, so I asked them about what the band does besides football games, because honestly, I didn’t really know. Senior Eric Devoto, an alto saxophone player, said that besides the football games, the marching band also participates in a few events throughout the fall like the Price Hill Thanksgiving Day and Harvest Home parades. After football season, Eric said, concert band takes over for marching band and begins to prepare for their winter and spring concerts that happen over in the Seton Auditorium. Eric described concert nights: “It’s a big deal for everyone. We’ve all been practicing for weeks and we finally get to show off our new songs in front of a real crowd”. Within the band, however, there are
The Spirit of Elder in the Price Hill Thanksgiving Parade.
even more factions that are rarely mentioned. Junior Ben Kean, member of the steel drum band, loves his extra part to play: “Steel drum band is probably the grooviest aspect of the band. We play at the steel drum festival, local parish festivals, and a few other venues. We also have a show every spring at the concert with Seton” The majority of my conversation with the band members, however, revolved around the future of the band. “As of now, the future seems unsure. There aren’t lots of incoming freshman joining, and more people are leaving when they graduate than are coming in. My freshman year we had about 70 members and this year we are down to about 40, and almost half of them are seniors,” Eric said. Underclassmen just don’t seem to be as interested in joining the band for some reason. A few of the current band seniors, not to name anyone, expressed their concern about the seemingly low interest in getting involved at Elder besides sports through-
out the underclassmen, and some of their arguments were pretty compelling. Although I realize that it takes a while to get used to a new school, as a current senior with three months left at Elder I would highly recommend getting involved and doing something that keeps you here after school a couple days of the week or makes you come in early. Some of the best memories I and many of my classmates have at Elder come from groups and events that didn’t play a part in our regular school day. If you just come to school at 7:50 and leave at 2:30 for four years, you won’t get the full Elder experience, so get involved before you regret it. Finally, I asked senior Quentin Gopal what an average day in band class looked like after football season, because I can always hear them playing in the Schaeper Center but I never know what they’re doing. He said, “A typical day in band class starts with warm ups and tuning where we get ourselves ready to play, and then we try out a song in an upcoming event or sports game that we plan to play. Practicing is sometimes slow-moving, but I guess it helps us learn our songs and get better.” Obviously, the band does more than most people notice in the form of concerts, parades, and other sports games. As a community, we can all agree that the band plays a vital role in both the Friday night football and Elder experiences as a whole. In order to keep this key element to the Elder legacy thriving, the band has to keep playing. Hopefully more students, future and current, begin to join the band and other groups that will be left with low numbers after the current senior class leaves. As for the near future, I’m sure the band will continue to play their songs and encourage the fans of the Elder community whenever and wherever they play.
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News
Friday February 28, 2020
Democratic primaries continue Election preview 2020 Dakota Postel ’20 as Sanders wins Nevada Sanders, and other well-known names Staff Writer Gus Middendorf ‘21 Staff Writer
As the Democratic primaries continue
to take shape, frontrunner Senator Bernie Sanders takes another early victory in Nevada, becoming the first candidate to win the popular vote of the race’s first three states in a competitive primary. This victory appears to be a confirmation in the rising popularity of the candidate, as Sanders once sat at a distant third place in state polls just a few months ago, ultimately finished with a strong 70 percent of Nevada state delegates. His victory speech called for a “government based on compassion, based on love and based on truth,” in contrast to the current administration, which he labels as one “of greed, corruption and lies.” Though Sanders’ campaign sees this win as a clear sign of a further sweep, other Democratic candidates believe that they still have a strong shot of taking the nomination. Former Vice-President Joe Biden, once both Nevada’s and the country’s frontrunner, declared of his campaign that “We’re alive and we’re coming back and we’re going to win.” This was immediately followed with a crowd member shouting, “Comeback kid!” to much applause. Pete Buttigieg, who, like Sanders, once threatened Biden’s former lead, used his speech to criticize Sanders’ ability to defeat Trump in the national election and attacking what he calls Sanders’ “inflexible, ideological revolution.” Taking a different spin on the loss than Biden and Buttigieg, Sanders’ fellow senator Elizabeth Warren enjoyed a percentage higher than previously anticipated by both media analysts and her campaign, with many citing her successful performance in the Nevada debate just a week before voting, where she earned buzz from attacks on the relatively new candidate Michael Bloomberg. Bloomberg, the former mayor of New York and billionaire businessman, just recently joined the Democratic Party (2018) during the beginnings of many campaigns. This recent shift to the party, along with his long list of sexual harassment allegations, former associations with President Trump, and what many call the racially charged “Stop and Frist” laws passed while mayor, remain a highly controversial topic for Democrats. Also, while his immense wealth and funding allows him to dominate political advertising, his status as a billionaire raises serious concerns for his opponents, especially during an election centering around issues
like healthcare and climate change, which Bloomberg staunchly differs on compared to other, more progressive Democrats. Although he received criticism from his fellow Democratic contenders, Sanders, ironically, was praised by President Trump after his win on Twitter, where the president advised him not to “let them take it away from you!” However, Trump, in a following tweet, referred to alleged reports of Russian support of Sanders: “‘The Kremlin is reportedly backing Bernie Sanders bid to win the White House.’ Jon Scott @ FoxNews. Why didn’t somebody tell me this?” These two tweets only led to more division among the Democratic candidates, with Sander’s opposition claiming that they are proof Trump believes that Sanders would be the most easily beatable candidate.
This year marks the end of President
Donald Trump’s first term in office as President of the United States. A lot has happened with this man in the oval office, with both praises and backlashes from thousands all over the country and even the world. So, what will become of President Trump this coming November is what everyone is asking each other. The Democratic Party has a very wide variety of candidates who are making a run to be the next “tip of the spear” for the Democrats in the 2020 Presidential Election. Well, lets see who the big faces are that are in the running for President, besides the current President Donald Trump. Competing in the election for the Donkeys are some big names, such as Joe Biden, Michael Bloomberg, Bernie
Right: Bernie Sanders at his celebration in Nevada (Rollingstone) Below: Former Vice President Joe Biden vows he is still in the fight. (Axios)
While there is a large list of differing issues among contenders, it now seems that the biggest detriment to a candidate is funding. Warren and Buttigieg have been in the most financial trouble, as they have neither the record-breaking small donor numbers of Bernie Sanders, 1.8 million donors averaging $18.53 (National Review), nor the already deep pockets of Michael Bloomberg, which the Federal Election Commission reports Bloomberg spending $263.6 million of in January alone. Though, Warren’s funds might be saved after a boost following her recent debate performance, along with a controversial choice to accept money from a political super PAC, a money-raising method that she has before criticized. Although polls and analysts are beginning to show a winner for the nomination, it is still too early to definitively call, with 47 states still remaining. The fateful “Super Tuesday”, comes March 3rd, which many think will be the final deciding point for who will win. With 14 states altogether allotting 1,357 delegates, it
seems to clear to many this Super Tuesday will determine the Democratic candidate. While Sanders is still projected to lose some states such as Minnesota and South Carolina, he is projected to bring home a majority in key states like California and Texas, which could propel him to victory.
from around the country. One individual who is really standing out for the Democrats is, former New York City Mayor, Michael Bloomberg. Bloomberg officially entered the primary for the Democratic Party in November, after many years of teasing the public about running for President. Bloomberg made quite the entrance into the race, putting up an eight-figure television ad campaign and advertisements, and taking his message right at President Trump. Strangely enough, back when Obama was president, Bloomberg criticized Obamacare, and said it was just another program that was going to cost big money. Now that Bloomberg is in the running for President as a Democrat, his health care plan is all for Obamacare. The other well-known Democrat, Joe Biden, announced his bid on April 25th last year. Biden is well known for denouncing the march on Charlottesville, by white supremacists, in 2017, and Trump’s response to the incident. “We are in a battle for the soul of this nation,” Biden said in the video. On the other hand, Biden entered the race with the type of name recognition you don’t like to see. Biden has faced many questions about being accused by women of unwanted touching, money, messaging, age, and ideology in the political environment that we live in today. Biden served as Vice President for Barack Obama from 2009 to 2017, and has also served in the U.S. Senate and other political positions. Biden speaks much on taking a different approach than President Trump on dealing with foreign leaders, like Russian President Vladimir Putin and North Korea’s Kim Jong Un. Biden also has said he would end family separations, with regards to those coming from the southern border. As for the Republican Party, Bill Weld, former Massachusetts Governor, emerged as the first Republican to challenge President Trump in April last year. Weld told ABC News that he would be ashamed if he passed on the opportunity to run against Trump. “I’d be ashamed of myself if hadn’t raised my hand and said, ‘Count me in,’” he told ABC News shortly after his announcement. “I think that the president is a very divisive force and that’s just not my style, and it’s not what Americans deserve.” Well there you have it folks. That is just a few of the big names that are competing in the 2020 Presidential Election. I believe it will be interesting to see if anyone will be able to stop President Trump from achieving a second term as President of the United States.
Friday February 28, 2020
News 15
Elder attends March for Life Jason Thomas ‘20 Staff Writer
The March for Life is an annual rally
that has been promoting Pro-Life ideals since the court decision of Roe vs Wade in 1973. This event allows Pro-Life supporters to speak out against abortion at the nation’s capital of Washington D.C. This year, Elder teachers and students took the trip to Washington to participate in the march, and promote their Catholic ideals. I got the opportunity to interview some of the students who went on the trip as to why they went on it and what the march means to them. Senior Joseph Schultz said he decided to go for two reasons. “The first reason I decided to attend the March for Life was to show my support for the movement and show that this is an issue that matters to people. The second reason was to experience a political rally. I have never had the chance to participate or go to a political rally, and I felt this would be a valuable experience.” I also got in touch with Joseph Book, who gave his reasons as to why he attended, “I decided to go on the March for Life because I believe it’s a matter of putting your money where your mouth is. Now, I understand that some people aren’t able to go on it due to financial reasons or simply because it isn’t their cup of tea, however, I think that if you support the pro-life
movement and are able to go on it you should. As far as my other personal reasons, this is my senior year and I don’t see myself having enough time in the future with college and career to attend it.” Joe also went into further details about his experience, “My favorite part about the trip was just seeing people coming from all around the United States congregate in one place for one cause. It was just a thrilling thing to see – everyone, all together, for one purpose.” “I felt like I made a contribution. You don’t have to bring a whole horde of people and a banner to make an impact, I feel like simply getting out there and showing that you care is enough.” Students from Elder also bused with students from St. X while on the trip. Joe said that their harmonica and flute were pretty…interesting. It is clean that many people march for different and valid reasons. Some come to unite with other pro-life members, some come in efforts to inform others as to why they think being pro-life is important, and some march to simply experience a political rally. Regardless of what attracts people to march, they all come to contribute towards a common cause that has a basis in valuing all life from its natural conception.
Tesla solar roof, is it worth it? Michael Connolly ‘20 Staff Writer
Everyone knows the accomplishments
of the eccentric Elon Musk. He was born in Pretoria, South Africa, living there most of his life before eventually coming to the United States and studying at the University of Pennsylvania. He received a Bachelor’s degree in Physics, and initially went back to Stanford to earn his PhD. After two days in the program however, he decided to drop out and pursue a business career. He co-founded a company called Zip2 with his brother, that eventually ended up being bought out for around $340 million. He then founded SpaceX, a program which has exponentially grown in the past couple of years, and became the CEO of Tesla, and the rest is history. He has remained in this CEO position since 2004, and is the longest tenured automotive CEO globally.
“The panels are not nearly as bulky as the panels before, so there may be a drop-in power that the panel is able to produce.” The question does not revolve around whether or not the product is going to sell. I believe the new look of the solar roof is going to revolutionize the solar technology game, and I could even see it becoming a monopoly with the technology scene. The problem arises with whether or not the economy is prepared for the difference between solar and oil. The oil industry has dominated the US economy since the integration of the nation. Change is something that is not particularly easy, but it is something that may change with the societal shift of our new generation. Senior Joseph Catania commented on how the solar technology may eventually overtake the fossil fuel field, “I believe that switching to solar energy is the morally correct, but who knows if we are ever going to be able to accomplish it.” Catania
Tesla’s new solar roof features a low profile that looks simply like a regular roof, but is it worth the price?
Elder students at the 2020 March for Life in Washington DC.
Tesla has gone far past the outreaches of the conventional car company however. Tesla has now sold T-shirts, wireless chargers, surfboards, and even flamethrowers. But perhaps the most societal changing products to come from Tesla, have been in the solar energy department. SolarCity was founded in 2006, and was eventually bought out by Musk to be made part of Tesla. They just recently announced the globalization of one of their most anticipated products, the new solar roof. The roof is designed to function the same as the traditional solar panel, but it adds a level of aesthetic that has not been seen before in the solar game. Senior Ben Witsken commented on how the new look may affect the market, “The new aesthetic may bring more money in from the stark market, but it will have other implications to the homebuyer.” When I pondered further into the subject as to what he means, he stated,
also said that, “The solar energy products may just be too expensive right now to be able to fully switch up the market.” His statements have a hint of truth, as the new solar roof from Tesla costs just around 34 thousand dollars. While this is an extreme amount to some, if someone is truly passionate about the change that can be brought about by the movement to solar they will eventually pay for it. While some may disagree, Nathan Bill says, “If someone is passionate about a cause and thinks it will succeed, then the amount of money they can contribute should not truly be a problem.” Regardless of what is realistic, the team over at Tesla has done an amazing job at changing the current reality we live in, while also expanding the possibility for the future. They have revolutionized the fields which they are involved in, and they will continue to change the narrative for everyone.
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Friday February 28, 2020
Back Page
Corona-spiracy?! Thomas Peters ‘20 Staff Writer
60,014 cases. 1,370 deaths.
10% chance of recovery. Scientists are calling it the modern Bubonic Plague. You should be scared. Obviously, the Coronavirus poses a serious threat to civilization as long as it persists. Health experts believe that it could become a pandemic, but say that it has not yet checked WHO (World Health Organization) pandemic boxes. The Bubonic Plague killed nearly 60% of Europe’s 14th century population. If the coronavirus were to be just as deadly and contagious, 4.6 billion or 2/3 of the world’s human population would be wiped out. However, unlike medieval Europe, we are now more connected and aware of world affairs. This time, we know what is coming and have solutions that are much better than leeches, urine baths, and rubbing chopped onions and snakes on our bodies. Those who suffer from Coronavirus infection suffer from extreme pneumonia, and have difficulty breathing. Antibiotics don’t work against this virus, but support for lung function and other organ systems from the hospital can help those healthy enough to recover. Overall, the coronavirus does not pose a major threat to the western world. According to The Guardian: “The WHO has declared the outbreak to be a public health emergency of international concern, and says there is a “window of opportunity” to halt the spread of the disease. The key issues are how transmissible this new coronavirus is between people and what proportion become severely ill and end up in hospital. Often viruses that spread easily tend to have a milder impact.” Although the long-term impact of this virus may not be as severe as you’ve heard, the circumstances of its coming-about are somewhat unknown. Soon after the outbreak, a “highly dubious” and unpublished scientific paper recently suggested that the coronavirus had in fact been created in a lab, possibly by the Chinese government. Near the alleged market source of the outbreak in the Wuhan province, there is supposedly a Chinese super-lab. What one must always remember about conspiracy theories is that in reality they are only theories. Sources claim that the Chinese may have been crafting a biological weapon to use against national enemies. Instead, they believe, the virus was leaked into the local markets and spread from there by accident. Worried Chinese also mention Li Wenliang, a doctor who alerted authorities about the outbreak. He was silenced by police and has since succumbed to the disease himself. This evidence is very troubling. What if the virus was used against the U.S. in attempt to spread and wipe out large number of the civilian population, or if it had gotten into even worse hands that used them to spread it quickly and rapidly across the whole world. Personally, I don’t believe the claims that the coronavirus was bioengineered. Even the Chinese government must be smart enough to realize that if you start to create a deadly virus you risk spreading it to your own population. Chinese officials are above mass-murdering their own citizens, even though they do restrict their lives in many ways. However, in order for the truth to be totally discovered, officials must look into how the virus came about, as well as work with scientists in order to defeat it. Hopefully, the Coronavirus conflict will soon be resolved, and few others die from being infected. While the virus does pose a major threat, with modern medicine it should be resolved in a few months without the virus spreading too far. If the coronavirus is escaping out of Chinese laboratories, who knows what they or other nations may still have locked up.
New York student makes history Rob Engelhardt ‘20 Staff Writer
Wolf Cukier is not your everyday senior
in high school. Cukier is only a senior at Scarsdale High School in New York and is already making a name for himself in the science world. Last summer, Wolf had an internship at NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center in Maryland. While interning in such a prestigious program, Wolf made the most of the resources at his disposal. He began his internship when he was tasked with visually examining potential transits in TESS data. The TESS stands for Transitioning Exoplanet Survey Satellite. Just three days into the internship, he saw a signal from a system called TOI 1338. This system was previously believed to be nothing special but after examining it, Wolf realized it seemed like a planet. Wolf said, “I was looking through the data for everything the volunteers had flagged as an eclipsing binary, a system where two stars circle around each other and from our view eclipse ach other every orbit. At first, I thought it was a stellar eclipse, but the timing was wrong. It turned out to be a planet.” This new exoplanet is a gas planet that is about the size of Saturn. It orbits
two stars that are about 1,300 light years away from our sun so it is definitely out of our sight unless aided by extreme telescopes. The planet is called TOI 1338. This planet is the first world in the TESS that orbits two stars. According to scientists, planets like this one aren’t new, but they are very rare. Unfortunately, TESS will only be able to study this new planet until November 2023 because of its orbit around the stars. Its eventual orbit will prevent light to be shown on it. Scientists hope that by 2031, when it comes out of orbit, they will once again be able to study this strange and rare exoplanet. The fact that a fellow 17-year-old, like Wolf, is discovering planets and working for NASA is incredible to me. According to his high school newspaper, Wolf is a well-liked and very bright student who is destined for big things in his near future. This prediction sounds pretty accurate considering he has already found more planets than a majority of people living today.
Compiled by the staff
This new column will feature short “bites” of information gathered by the staff from
their efforts to find unique and interesting facts to share with you, our readers. We hope that this will become a regular feature and a new and anticipated portion of your monthly helping of The Quill. Enjoy. According to recent studies, it is said that squirrels cause 10-20% of the world’s power outages. Maybe Rick and Morty were right after all. Michael Connolly When Gerber baby foods began to sell in parts of Africa, they continued to use their usual packaging, with the cute baby on the front. They didn’t realize until later that where they were selling it, it was a common practice to help illiterate people buy things by putting pictures on the wrapper of what was inside. Thomas Peters Every second, four babies are born in the world. That means that while you read this about 20 more babies were born. Nicholas Seger. The King of Hearts is the only king in a deck of cards without a mustache. Dakota Postel The city of Portland, Oregon was decided on the flip of a penny. The cities founders both wanted to name the city after their hometowns. If the coin had flipped the other way, then the city would now be called Boston, Oregon. Gus Middendorf We hate the way we sound on recordings because when we talk we hear a mix of our vocal cords and repeated vibrations from inside our skull and bones. When we listen to a recording we just hear the vocal cords. Henry Mazza John Tyler (the tenth President of the United States) was born in 1790 and still has two living grandchildren. Jacob Byrne The unicorn is the official animal of Scotland. Nicholas Hunter According to National Geographic, the world’s most typical human is right-handed, has a mobile phone, makes less than $12,000 per year and doesn’t have a bank account. This is why its important to strive for the higher things. Jason Thomas The blob of toothpaste that sits on your toothbrush is called a “nurdle.” If you don’t believe it, there was a lawsuit over which toothpaste company had the right to depict it. Carmine Domenicone President Calvin Coolidge had two pet raccoons that wandered around the White House during his presidency. Mason Berger The Ohio Medical Board recently declined the request to include “being a Bengals or Browns fan” on a list of acceptable symptoms to qualify for medical marijuana. Mr. Rogers The average person will spend six months of their life waiting for red lights to turn green. Robby Engelhardt In 1712, Finland added a second leap day (Feb. 30th) in order to catch up with the rest of the world’s calendar. Jack Langen Wolf Cukier, senior in high school, discovered a new planet while working for NASA.