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DAN'S PAPERS, November 20, 2009 Page 37 www.danshamptons.com

House/ home By Susan Galardi

In the next week or so, many parents will be sitting down with teachers to discuss their children’s progress. Now that our son is in first grade, we feel that finally, this process will have some teeth. No more of that touchy/feely “plays will with others” stuff. We want to know the real dirt, the bottom line, the hard facts. In other words, is he the smartest kid in the class or isn’t he? And if he isn’t, what are you teachers doing wrong and why aren’t you seeing him for the extraordinary child he is? When our son was in pre-k at the East Hampton Learning Center, I remember muscling Miss Sandy to give us the goods. As she was discussing his cognitive abilities and showing us the difference in his coloring over the semester, I insisted, “But would you say that he is in the upper level of his class? He is advanced, isn’t he?” Sandy maintained her characteristic calm (probably the same demeanor she displayed with a child in a full-throttle temper tantrum), pointed to the paperwork in front of me, and said something noncommittal like, “As you can see, he has improved over the semester in keeping with expectations of his age group.” She probably wasn’t allowed to be candid, you know, for legal reasons or privacy issues. But after much jockeying, pushing, inferring and generally being unwilling to leave her office until she said what I wanted to hear, she finally threw me a bone: “He’s a very bright little boy and he’s a pleasure to have in class.” Aha! Just as I thought: Our son IS the perfect student and the smartest. Hmpf! As a kid in parochial school, I was always confused about why God the father sent his son to suffer for the sins of mankind. “If he’s so loving, why didn’t he go himself? Why did he make his son go through all of

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 20 KIDS KNEAD CHALLAH – 5:30 p.m. Challah breadmaking, songs, Kiddush juice-making, and grand children’s raffle. Free, no affiliation necessary. Chabad of Southampton, 214 Hill St. 631-287-2249. SHELTER ISLAND LIBRARY – “Books, Babies, Songs and Rhymes” at 10:30 p.m. Program is for children up to 3. Contact Jennifer Blume at 631-749-0042. SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 21 GOAT ON A BOAT – Lize Joyce and puppets present the Brement Town Musicians. Tickets are $10. $9 for grandparents and members, $5 for children under 3. 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Contact Liz at 631-725-4193. HAMPTONS BASEBALL CAMP - For children of all experience levels, ages 4-13, who want to play baseball in a safe, fun, positive learning environment. Emphasis on effort over talent, team concepts and core fundamentals; plus tips on diet, fitness. Come for the day or for the season. SYS Youth Services, Southampton. 631-907-2566. LIL COWPOKES PONY CLUB – Every Sat. from 10 a.m.-12 p.m. for ages 3 and up. Learn about animals and how to ride a pony. Amaryllis Farm Equine Rescue, 93 Merchants Path, Southampton. 631-537-7335. ART AT GOLDEN EAGLE– “Turkey Sculpture” clay art workshop. Recommended for ages 6-13. 10am-11am $20. 14 Gingerbread Lane East Hampton 631-324-0603. SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 22 PETTING FARM AT AMARYLLIS SANCTUARY –Love animals? Especially rescued ones? Visit Octaveous and Sir Lancelot the potbelly piggies; Binky the mini burro and others! Every Sun. 1:30 p.m.-3:30 p.m. 93 Merchants Path off Sagg Road, Sagaponack. $5. 631-537-7335. MONDAY, NOVEMBER 23 AFTER SCHOOL PROGRAMS

– And Toddler

He’s the Model Student! Just Say It!

that?” I thought, maybe worried as a young child that my mother might make the same sacrifice. Then I had a child, and realized that most parents would take the bullet for their kids whenever they could, because it’s far more painful to see your child suffer than go through the most horrific suffering yourself. Maybe this is a bit of a dramatic comparison to make in the context of a parent/teacher meeting, but it’s discomforting for parents waiting to hear the painful truth: that your son is struggling with math concepts, your daughter is so shy she cries when she’s called on, there may be some learning disability requiring remediation. While many parents angst over the black-and-white academic issues (will he get good grades and go Ivy League?), other parents (like me) worry about how a child is doing emotionally. It wouldn’t bother me so much to learn my son doesn’t grasp double-digit addition (which I wouldn’t learn because he is brilliant), but it would keep me up at night if I learned that he feels defeated and insecure. But next week, we’ll learn what’s going on with our son at our parent/teacher meeting. And just in time, I got an email recently from the Huntington Learning Center of Calverton, offering suggestions Beth Troy

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Kid’s Calendar

Workshops sponsored by The Parrish Art Museum. Registration required, call for info: 631-283-2118, ext. 30 to register. 25 Jobs Lane, Southampton. KIDS KARAOKE – Mondays. 5 to 7 p.m. Regulars Music Café, 1271 North Sea Road, Southampton. 631-287-2900. ONGOING CMEE – Children’s Museum of the East End. Check out the new Lego table, improvements to the general store, new sand table and a new art area. Interactive exhibitions, arts and science based programs and workshops, special events. 376 Bridge/Sag Turnpike, Bridgehampton. $7 for non-members, members are free. 631-537-8250. cmee.org. GOAT ON A BOAT – Puppet shows, programs for children. Rte. 114 and East Union St, Sag Harbor. 631-725-4193. goatonaboat.org. SOUTH FORK NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM (SOFO) – Museum hours 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. 7 days a week, year round. A walk through the museum is like an interpretive nature hike. The museum even provides a field guide to exhibits. Displays make you feel like a naturalist exploring a new territory. 377 Bridge/Sag Tpke. 631-537-9735. JACKSON POLLOCK FAMILY DRIP PAINTING WORKSHOP – Tour & Explore the Pollock Krasner House & Studio, followed by a drip-painting workshop. 10 -11:30 a.m. For Thurs. or Fri. workshop contact Karyn Mannix at 631-329-2811 or jacksonpollock.wordpress.com. For Sat. workshop contact Joyce Raimondo at 917-502-0790 or joyceraimondo.com. Reservations required. SOUTHAMPTON YOUTH SERVICES – Kids’ programs daily in sports, dance and more. 631-287-1511. YOUTH ADVISORY COMMITTEE – Sponsored by the Town of Southampton Youth Bureau to give kids a voice in town government. 631-702-2425. ART AT THE GOLDEN EAGLE – 14 Gingerbread La. East Hampton. 631-324-0603. SOUTHAMPTON TOWN WORKSHOPS – Call to reg-

of questions to ask teachers at progress meetings. Here are a few. On General Progress: Is my child performing to grade level standards? Is he keeping up with homework and participating in class? What are his strengths? In what areas could he improve? What skills should he master this quarter/semester? On Grading/Tests/Homework: Will there be standardized exams this year? How do students prepare for them? What are classroom grades based on? How much time should my child spend on homework each night? Parent Involvement: How can I help my child improve? To stay organized with assignments and projects? How can I support you in your classroom objectives? Good Communication: What is the best way to communicate with you? What should I try to accomplish with my child before our next conference? How can I inform you of my progress? To those, I would add: Is my child happy in school? Does he have a good relationship with you and the other teachers? Do his classmates like him? Do they invite him to join in their activities? In other words, gulp, does he play well with others…?

ister for classes 631-728-8585. MUSIC TOGETHER BY THE DUNES – Music/ movement program for children 0 to 5-years-old and their caregivers. Mon. and Tues. mornings – Dance Centre of the Hamptons, WH Beach; Thurs. mornings – SH Cultural Center; Fri. mornings – SH Town Rec Center, Majors Path. 631-764-4180. STORYTIMES HAMPTON LIBRARY– Saturdays 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. Children ages 4 to 7. Stories and music making. Rhyme Time – Thursdays, Saturdays, Tuesdays.10 a.m. 6 months to 3. Stories, rhymes and songs. Registration required. Main Street, Bridgehampton. 631-537-0015. JOHN JERMAIN LIBRARY – Thursdays at 10:30 a.m., Main St., Sag Harbor. 631-725-0049. ROGERS MEMORIAL LIBRARY – After school stories on Tues., 4:30 for K-2. Lap time on Thurs. 11:15 for 18 to 36 months. Fri., songs/stories for 0 and up, 11:15 For 1 month to 17 months a “Mother Goose” program at 10:30 a.m. on Mondays. 91 Coopers Farm Rd, Southampton. 631-287-6539. MONTAUK LIBRARY – MOMMY AND ME at 10 a.m. for pre-schoolers and parents/caregivers. Montauk Highway. 631-324-4947. AMAGANSETT FREE LIBRARY – Saturdays, 10 a.m., 215 Main Street, Amagansett. 631-267-3810. Send all events for the kids’ calendar to events@danspapers.com by Friday at noon.

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Dan's Papers Nov. 20, 2009  

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