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DAN'S PAPERS, June 12, 2009 Page 68

Letters INCREDIBLE SHRINKING PAPER Dear Dan, What a shock. This routine Monday morning, I wandered out to my driveway searching for my daily newspaper in its usual plastic sleeve. Almost missing it, I put on my reading glasses. There it was! Newsday shrank in size and content overnight! Just yesterday was the Sunday issue. Yes, the May 31, 2009 issue celebrated 40 years ago on Long Island. You read it. Your readers read it, too. It was the “Summer of 1969” tribute. Photos of Woodstock. Stories of the moon walk. Nostalgia of the 1969 Mets and Jets. Parents at Grumman. Boyfriends in Vietnam. All in full-size newsprint format! So, what do you think, Mr. Rattiner? Was that Newsday’s way of foreshadowing its exit – a 40-year finale of sorts? With original newspapers in hand, the “old” Newsday measures 13.5 inches high, compared to the “new compressed content” at only 12 inches. In contrast, Dan’s Papers can now assume its proper place in Long Island news: The Grandest! Dan’s Papers issue of May 29, 2009 STILL measures a full 13.5 inches high by 10.5 inches! Yes, it is a news journal’s content that matters the most. Newsday lost its Long Island heart after local writer and columnist, Ed Lowe, had to depart. Yet it is you, Dan, who remains our Long Island soul and identity. You deliver content that is relevant, true and informative, while giving “Long Islanders” our international news stand identity. For that Mr. Rattiner, I thank you. As a loyal reader, I wonder what are your thoughts and comments? Pamela J. Sandmeier Sound Beach, New York Via e-mail Next month Newsday will be wallet size. – DR

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A GOOD LAUGH IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL Dear Dan, I have been reading Dan’s Papers for many years and have read many of your articles, all of which involved a certain amount of humor, which I appreciated. However, the article in the current (June 5, 2009) issue called “If It Continues for More than 4 Hours” is the funniest I’ve ever read. Perhaps the funniest thing I’ve ever read anywhere. I didn’t stop laughing from the start of the article to the finish. You are a master of humor. You took something absurd and reduced it to its logical consequences, which were even more absurd. Thank you for a very good laugh! Maurice Wittenberg Water Mill Via e-mail You’re welcome. – DR THANK YOU Dear Dan, On Monday, June 1, my husband and I were on vacation and stayed in Montauk for the night. We were traveling on motorcycles. For dinner we walked from our motel to have dinner at Manucci’s, which was excellent. The next morning, when I was packing up my gear I realized I had left my purse at the restaurant. To make a long story short, Ray, the owner, had taken my purse home with him after calling my son to say he had the purse (my cell phone was clipped to the strap of the purse). Ray went the extra mile to attempt to locate my husband and me the previous night. I just wanted to write and publicly say that your area should be very proud to have a person like Ray. We live in the small Hamlet of Raquette Lake in the Adirondack Mountains. It makes us proud to know that we have honest people in both places of New York.

And if you want a delicious meal, Manucci’s is the place! Mary D Lamphear Raquette Lake, NY Via e-mail This is the Montauk spirit. – DR SLOW LABOR MOVEMENT Dear Dan, I just read “Slow Shingling.” I really liked the way you told the story. Thanks. And did you ever confirm whether the guy in the white truck was being paid for his “slow labor,” and if so, how much? Another story perhaps? Dorothy Watson Via e-mail I have not checked. – DR TOUGH LANGUAGE Dear Dan, Your article was great, BUT one thing was not addressed. While there is no such thing as an “American” heritage (everyone came from somewhere else!), what has many of us upset is that for the FIRST time, almost everything is not just in ENGLISH, but in Spanish also. Since the beginning of time, people came here and learned ENGLISH. Why is it that notices from school, products we buy, etc. are now in BOTH languages? As an added note, the Continental Congress voted English as the “language,” passed by one vote. Penny Whitman Via e-mail One of the losers replied, “Sacre bleu!” – DR

Police Blotter Sex Offender Alfred Balcuns was charged with sexual abuse in the first degree in Montauk after being accused of having sexual contact with a child under 11 years old, and for endangering the welfare of a child under 17.

woman in East Quogue never received this advice. The woman was arrested after her landlord called police because she was behaving erratically in the house, and when police arrived, she assaulted a 21year veteran of the force. She was sent to a psychiatric hospital for a mental health evaluation.

Attacked an Officer Here’s a bit of advice: Don’t attack a police officer. We only say this because apparently a 49-year-old

Sibling Rivalry Getting into an argument with your brother is one thing; beating the crap out of him with a baseball bat is quite another. A 50-year-old man from Mastic Beach let his brotherly feelings get the best of him. He was arrested after he beat his own brother with a baseball bat after an argument in East Hampton. His brother sustained a fractured arm and charges have been filed.

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Just Having Fun A young man from Arizona was having a bit too much fun in Bridgehampton and was arrested after he was caught breaking windows and screen doors at a residence that he trespassed onto.

Visine A man in East Hampton was pulled over by police officers, who noticed that he immediately was reaching for Visine eye drops and putting them in his eyes when they approached the vehicle. The man was then seen spitting out mouthwash and also spraying his car with aerosol deodorant. Police were not fooled, and could smell the combination of minty fresh Scope, Mountain Springs Right Guard and grade A, illegal marijuana. The young man was arrested and was given a bail set at $300 for the incident. His personal items, including the Visine, were returned to him. My Beer! A nightclub owner called police in Hampton Bays to report that two cases of beer had been stolen. Police are investigating the incident. They at first tried to look around the club to see if anybody was acting intoxicated, but that didn’t work out to be a very good strategy. Underage An underage drinker in East Hampton was given a summons after he was caught drinking at a party on the beach. The rest of the partiers got away.

- David Rattiner

Dan's Papers June 12, 2009  

Dan's Papers, the 51-year-old bible of the Hamptons, is owned by Manhattan Media, a multi-media publishing company based in New York City,...