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Queensmount is set in a peaceful area close to the heart of Bournemouth, overlooking the golf course. It has recently been refurbished to the highest standards, enhancing the care and comfort of the residents. Key features at Queensmount: đ 52 ensuite rooms đ Bar đ Full lift access đƫFlat screen TVs with Freeview đ Conservatory đ Hair salon đ Bright lounges đƫMobile library đƫWiFi available

Care available at Queensmount: đ Nursing đ Residential đƫPalliative đ Respite đ Convalescence For more information about Queensmount, please call 0800 012 1508 quoting CH2700 Search ‘Bupa Care Homes’ If you are looking for a career in nursing or the health sector please visit our website for more information on job opportunities within Bupa or call 0800 028 0275.

Welcome to the rest of your life!

in this issue...

Age is a funny thing that seems to happen to other people – just when did those children become adults with children of their own? But age also occasionally becomes visible out of the corner of one's eye as one passes a mirror. It is not, though, time just yet to reach for the wrinkle cream, but instead let us pause for a moment and reflect on how life has changed. 50 years ago, a 50-year-old man looked like an old man; 60 years ago, a 60-year-old wearing jeans was a cowboy; 70 years ago, wireless was something that a 70-year-old listened to; 80 years ago, an 80-year-old would already have lived 20 years longer than the average life expectancy. We are not just living longer, though, we are spending longer living; we are much more likely to be much more active, both mentally and physically, for much longer. All the above is by way of saying that, whilst those in their 20s and 30s are becoming infantilised by wearing 'onesies', those who have passed their 50th year are not 'not acting their age', they are simply enjoying the fruits of their labours and not allowing their actions to be determined solely by their date of birth. Welcome to the rest of your life; this is Senior Living… be sure to enjoy it!


For extra copies of this magazine, call us on 01929 551264 or email:

The sandwich generation +

Keep fit and carry on CWa_d]j^[ceije\oekh^[Wbj^WdZ\_jd[iihƒ]_c[


Where to go and what to do ?Z[Wied][jj_d]_dlebl[ZWdZ\_dZ_d]d[m_dj[h[iji


Eat, drink and be happy >emje][jceh[ekje\[Wj_d]_dWdZ[Wj_d]ekj


Time to travel Effehjkd_j[i\ehjhWl[bW\j[h+&


Inspiration or perspiration :eoekb_a[jej_bb]WhZ[di"ehl_i_jj^[c5


Save, invest, borrow or spend? ;nWc_d_d]j^[efj_edi\ehbWj[h#b_\[\_dWdY[


Upsize/downsize the empty nest? J^[a_Zi^Wl[\bemd"Xkjj^[ocWoX[XWYa


What is this life if full of care? M^Wj^[bf_iWlW_bWXb[je]_l[jeWbel[Zed[5


A moving target? A[[f_d]ceX_b[_idej`kijWXekj\_jd[ii


Senior moment D[Wb8kjj[hmehj^imhobeeaWjb_\[W\j[h+&_d:ehi[j


SENIOR LIVING 2013 is published by The Dorset Magazine Ltd from 7 The Leanne, Sandford Lane, Wareham, Dorset BH20 4DY. Tel: 01929 551264 Publisher: Lisa Richards Editor: Joël Lacey Advertisement Sales Director: Dave Silk 01305 836440 Business Development Manager: Julie Cullen 01258 459090 Editorial Designer: Mark Fudge Printed by: Pensord, Blackwood Reproduction in whole or in part prohibited without permission.









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The sandwich generation 8cXe@cc`e^nfik_nXjcffb`e^ ]finXi[kfjfd\k`d\]i\\f] i\jgfej`Y`c`kpY\kn\\eZ_`c[$ i\Xi`e^Xe[^iXe[Z_`c[i\e% K_\e_`j0*$p\Xi$fc[dfk_\i ]\ccXe[Yifb\_\i_`g¿% UNTIL HER fall, my mother had been astonishingly healthy. In her eighties she was still attending League of Health and Beauty fitness classes. Once when I telephoned, she said she was doing some ironing for the old lady next door and when I asked the age of the ‘old lady’, ‘74’ was the reply; my mother was 85 at the time. At the age of 90 she danced almost non-stop for two hours at our daughter’s wedding. She devotedly nursed my step-father through his last illness, but she had been widowed for three years at the time of her fall and had resumed her busy life, taking a full part in the activities of the Warwickshire village which she had made her home when she married my step-father 20 years earlier. For my five siblings and me, her fall took her from being a respected parent, good company and a source of pride to being an almost constant cause for worry – we had become members of the sandwich generation. The immediate concern was to make her as comfortable as possible in hospital, and not only physically. In many ways she had led a sheltered life, and the sounds, sights and smells of an NHS geriatric ward caused her great distress in her weakened and frightened state. Only when she moved to a convalescent home with a calmer, less institutional atmosphere did her morale begin to improve. Meanwhile there had been much discussion about what should happen next. We faced the first great moral dilemma of the sandwich generation: how far do you let an elderly parent make her own decisions, even if you have serious fears that she is putting herself in danger? My mother’s wish for independence had survived the accident intact, and she insisted that she could go home and resume her life as before. But she was still unsteady and could not really get about without a Zimmer frame. A gastric infection picked up in hospital proved difficult to shift, so her continence was unreliable. As a result of the traumatic experience, there were signs of mental confusion – not a great deal at that stage, but enough to make us worry about, for example, a gas ring or a bath tap left on. Some of us felt that this was the time for her to go into a care home, while she was comparatively strong enough, mentally and physically, to gain advantage from the company and the activities. Others felt that if she wanted to live on her own, she

Kdj_bh[bWj_l[bo h[Y[djbo"ekh cej^[hmWi Ze_d]_hed_d] \ehj^[[bZ[hbo bWZod[njZeeh" m^emWi_d\WYj [b[l[do[Whiekh cej^[hi`kd_eh should be allowed to do so, with a carer coming in a couple of times a day. She was fortunate enough to be able to afford a full-time, live-in carer, and that was finally the solution on which we all agreed, my mother only after some gentle persuasion. It proved a good solution at first. My mother was happy in the familiar surroundings of her own home, and on sunny days she could spend time pottering or just sitting in her beloved garden. Although she could not go out and about, her village friends called for a chat or to sing along with her to ‘Songs of Praise’ on a Sunday afternoon. She was well enough not to be a worry while the carer took off the two hours to which she was entitled every afternoon. The carer was changed by the agency every few months and almost without exception, they were superb. Their patience, cheerfulness and professionalism impressed us hugely, and some of them became dear friends. Over two years, however, the situation gradually deteriorated. Heart and other problems restricted my mother’s mobility and put an ever-increasing load on the carer. Her mental confusion grew more noticeable. Worst of all, she became desperately bored. She could rarely go out into the garden, her eyesight and her powers of concentration worsened to the point where reading or watching television were difficult, her friends called less frequently as she became more querulous and they got on with their own lives. Several times she said that sitting in a chair all day, looking at the same window, was driving her mad: her spark of independence and her sociable nature remained, which in some ways was admirable, but now they were working against her and driving her into deep depression.


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The medical and social care professionals agreed with us that the time had come for residential care, so we faced the next big question for the sandwich generation: how on earth do you choose the right home for your elderly parent? The answer is that you can follow all the advice, visit dozens of homes and ask all the right questions, but you just don’t know until after she has moved in. It is not only a matter of checking the facilities; even the least paranoid of us has read of ‘elder abuse’ in places like Winterbourne View, so the weight of responsibility is huge. We found a delightful home in the nearest town to my mother’s village. The staff were unfailingly kind and competent, the place was

clean and bright, and to her credit, my mother went there in a positive frame of mind, prepared to make a success of the new arrangement. Within a week, though, it was clear that it wasn’t working. Nobody was at fault, but my mother moved to a nursing home near my brother and sister in Hertfordshire, where she is today, cared for brilliantly and as happy as she is likely to be anywhere. We have been very lucky in being a large family; the pressure on an only child is hard to imagine. We have been able to spread the load, one of us dealing with financial matters and having power of attorney, another liaising with the domestic care agency, another being the contact for the GP and other medical professionals, and so on. At the same time, there is potential for deep family strife at a worrying, emotional time. Fortunately, we all get on well and have felt able to express our views while accepting that the only concern is the best interests of our mother, and that those would not be well served by creating divisions through a refusal to compromise. Our main lesson from the experience is the rather depressing one that there is no good solution to the problems of an elderly parent who needs increasing levels of care; the most one can hope for is to find the least bad one. Her quality of life is inevitably going to deteriorate along with her physical and mental health, to the point where one wonders why so much effort is put into warding off conditions which a century ago forestalled the miseries of old age; pneumonia used to be known as ‘the old man’s friend’. My mother has said often in the last year that she hoped the Lord would take her during the night, and it would be difficult to regard it as a tragedy if He did. The tragedy is the slow decline of an independent, spirited old lady into a sad, confused geriatric, but it is one with which the sandwich generation increasingly has to deal.


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HIGH QUALITY RESIDENTIAL, NURSING AND MEMORY CARE WITHIN THE MOST LUXURIOUS ENVIRONMENT Spend the morning with us and explore our home and facilities whilst enjoying this social gathering and discover what we can offer for you and your loved ones.

You are invited to join us for coffee any Thursday morning between 10am - 11.30am

We look forward to welcoming you and highlighting how Regency Manor cares to make a difference.

Please contact us on 01202 715760 or and quote DLANN Blair Avenue Lower Parkstone Dorset BH14 0DA

Don’t worry..

...about a thing Every aspect of Dunwood Court has been carefully planned and considered to make retirement living completely worry free.

The seven remaining apartments are individually designed with generously proportioned rooms, extra wide hallways and spacious bathrooms bedrooms and wet-rooms. The development also boasts a residents lounge, kitchenette, two guest suites, physiotherapy and hairdressing facilities. Based just 5 minutes by car (or our own minibus) from the centre of Romsey, Dunwood Court offers rural living in extensive grounds with beautiful views over the surrounding countryside.

It is specifically designed for people over 65 who want to enjoy independent retirement living in their own luxury home, but, remain secure in the knowledge that care and support are immediately available on-site, if and when they may need it. Plus our unique house swap offer gives you full market value for your existing property (and there are no caveats or clever smallprint) or cash buyers can get up to £43,000 discount. While our free move service and 2 week window to move your belongings from your old property to your new one, all help take the stress out of moving.

So why not see for yourself what Dunwood Court has to offer, just call us on 01794 517064 to book an appointment. We’ll be delighted to see you.

Dunwood Court, Sherfield English, Nr Romsey, Hants SO51 6FD.

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FITNESS IS a little bit like laundry, do a little bit regularly and it is easy to keep on top of things; leave it too long and you'll end up having to buy new clothes! An absence of fitness doesn't happen overnight, it sneaks up on you until you find yourself sweating and breathless; likewise, a return to fitness doesn't have to be done in one intense session… with the same results. One of the alternative names for RSI (repetitive strain injury) is SPOD: Static Posture Overuse Disorder. This, though, is a term which could validly be applied to the sedentary lifestyle which it is all too easy to slip into – not only when the daily imperative of getting up and going to work goes away, but equally when one is sitting at a desk, sitting in a car from home to work and sitting down at home. There are serious health implications of this kind of lifestyle – significantly exacerbated by smoking and poor diet – not the least of which are, in no particular order: heart risk, stroke, pulmonary problems, disturbed sleep, digestive issues and feeling tired. In much the same way as the word 'pension' is boring, 'exercise' has a feel of punishment to it. It conjures up images of sweaty gym bunnies and lonely joggers looking bright red and miserable in the sleet. There is no doubt that exercise as an end in itself can be quite difficult to get into, but strangely (and not wholly healthily) addictive once one is dedicated to it. The key to improving and maintaining fitness is not to look upon exercise as the goal. Taking a stroll by the sea on a beautiful day sounds a lot better than exercise; communing with one's dog on a walk

in the woods sounds much more fun than pumping iron; playing with one's grandchildren is much more rewarding than sitting on an exercise bike… as is, incidentally, actually getting on a bike to go for a pub lunch in a country village. The key to fitness is not to punish oneself with exercise, but to reward oneself with it. Yes, you will get fitter faster if you have a personal trainer who is 'beasting' you into 'another 30 reps of bicep curls', but why would anyone want to be bullied into feeling better? The answer, rather depressingly, is that we often need an external stimulus to help us to start and to continue with a fitness regime. So, for those without a dog, a bike, a personal trainer or grandchildren, what is the best way to get, and to keep, fit? The answer is simple: find someone else who is looking to do the same thing. This might be in the form of group exercises (and your local GP's surgery will often have information on this kind of thing), it might be in the form of taking up a new sport, or re-engaging with one from one's youth. If it is the latter, and this is particularly, but not exclusively addressed to the male readership, do not for one instant think that a lay-off of forty years is perfect preparation for high impact sports; it really, really is not. Overdo it at the beginning, and pain is coming your way. There is a more serious point here. If you start to do high-impact exercise, do remember your knees may be carrying more weight and with less muscular support for your ligaments than was the case when last you exercised seriously; this can lead to injuries.

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An alternative to serious exercise is, well, to exercise in a way that is silly. The Silly Army is a group that meets up every Sunday behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance in Kings Park in Bournemouth and plays alternative games. There are throwing games, ball games like big tennis and combiball, which are perversions of well-known sports, but huge fun as well as other bizarre takes on what constitutes sport, often involving space-hoppers. The age range runs from students to those who should know better, but it's an incredibly enjoyable way to get fit. If this kind of organised sport seems a little intense, you can take other small steps, literally, to keep yourself fit. A staircase is a cheap gym: go up and down the stairs a few more times than usual. And choosing to walk for any trips of two miles or under can boost your fitness quite quickly. Remember, exercise can be aerobic or anaerobic, so if you are out of breath, that is not a bad thing, it just shows you have been putting effort in; the key to fitness is how quickly you stop being out of breath. At the beginning, this may be quite a while. The more exercise you do, the more quickly you will recover. Suppleness is often one of the first things to 'go' when you have not exercised for a while. You can devote just a few minutes per day to gently stretching your muscles and improving your flexibility. Greater flexibility makes other physical exercise easier, so do try to incorporate this into a daily or weekly routine:

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it could be as simple as gently stretching after a bath or shower, reaching around a bit further with a towel to dry oneself, stretching on tip-toe, or gently reaching down in the direction of touching one's toes. The key is just to try a tiny bit further each time, but without forcing things to the point of agony. Health is not only about fitness and our locomotive powers, which may dissipate over the years without a little maintenance; general health also includes sight, hearing, and dental health. As well as permitting us to keep active in lots of different spheres, having decent sight is a must if one is driving and effective hearing is fundamental to safety when cycling on country lanes. Furthermore, sight testing may reveal early indicators of other, more general, health issues. Defective eyesight is not only annoying and occasionally dangerous, but can lead to headaches and unnecessary pain. Likewise, a poor dental routine, as well as inevitably leading to tooth and gum problems, can lead to pain that is on a different level to practically anything else in ordinary life. Hearing loss can have an altogether more insidious side-effect, if left uncorrected: that of isolation. If you start to avoid situations where there are groups of people as you can't easily understand what is being said, it can be the start of a slow, inexorable move into isolation. Loneliness is a medical issue; it has been estimated that being lonely has the equivalent deleterious health effect as of smoking 100 cigarettes a week! On a less mortal, but equally important note, whilst mishearing or not hearing one's spouse may occasionally have hilarious consequences, it is very, very annoying for the other party, and in may cases is almost entirely unnecessary. Whilst the one-time stigma of wearing glasses has now been reversed to the extent that people without an eyesight problem wear them for fashion reasons, hearing aids (Manchester misery Morrissey, of the Smiths, aside) have not become a fashion item. However, they have come on leaps and bounds in terms of both their effectiveness and their size. The golden rule for health â&#x20AC;&#x201C; whether in terms of fitness, pain, sight, mobility, hearing or teeth â&#x20AC;&#x201C; is to do something about whatever may be bothering you by talking to someone about it, and then doing something about it. Few things in life are catastrophic if left for a few days; it is, however, all too easy to let a few days become a few weeks, months or years, by which point the minor issue may be a major problem and may be may be too late to resolve.

Yaffle Care, a new type of care home, has opened in Broadstone, Poole. The new concept brings together over 30 years of nursing home experience of Sarah Jessup and her family with Burwood Nursing Home which they built in the early 1980s. The new home accommodates residents with varying degrees of nursing care including dementia and is based on the idea that residents not only receive nursing care but also stimulation and variety, so they can continue to enjoy doing the things that they always have done. There are separate facilities for different activities, which means that family members can also be involved. You can go with your family to the 1920’s styled theatre to see a show or a movie, to the Railway Tavern for a game of cards and a ploughman’s lunch or bake some scones in the residents' kitchen. Mealtimes are important daily occasions. At Yaffle, the open-plan dining room allows residents to see their food being prepared, cooked and served, and they can also let the chef know what they would prefer to eat and how they would like it cooked.

The New Yaffle Care Nursing Home

Quality Care in a homely environment We are a family run care home in Broadstone, Poole. We provide all aspects of nursing care, including dementia, within a new purpose built 42 bed home set amongst beautiful woodlands. The direct involvement of our family on a day to day basis means that we provide care of the highest quality within a homely environment.

Yaffle Care offers: 24 hour nursing care including dementia Own minibus providing regular excursions Spacious and light rooms with private balconies  Comprehensive activities schedule  Extensive communal space including dining rooms, hair salon, pub, music hall, library and activities rooms.  Aromatherapy and hydrotherapy treatments  All bedrooms with digital television, internet access and telephone Ensuite wet rooms to bedrooms  Convenient location with a bus stop right outside  Real home cooking in our open plan kitchen  Wonderful and loyal care staff

All bedrooms are attractively furnished and include modern comforts such as: an ensuite wetroom; a television with internet access; an electric, profiling bed and ceiling hoists to facilitate the safe and comfortable movement of less-mobile residents. Other facilities include kitchen/diners on each floor, hydrotherapy and aromatherapy bathing, a hairdressing salon and the Chinese Library, which has a fish tank looking through to the open-plan lounge. Yaffle has its own minibus enabling regular outings to local attractions such as Wimborne Market, local garden centres and Poole harbour boat trips, which are always very popular.

Yaffle Care Come and see the new home and our refreshing approach to care based on activities, stimulation and the love of nature. Drop in anytime and we shall be pleased to show you around. 100 Dunyeats Road, Broadstone, Dorset BH18 8AL

100 Dunyeats Road, Broadstone, Poole, Dorset BH18 8AL

Tel: 01202 693224 Email

Tel: 01202 693224 Email

Yaffle Care

Volunteers crucial in helping older people to beat loneliness. Research published has shown that around 10% of older people over 65 are chronically lonely in the UK. This means they are lonely all or most of the time. This has the same health impact as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Local charity Brendoncare offers a solution to this problem by running over 20 friendship and well-being clubs across Dorset. The clubs are tailored to the needs of the communities they serve. They provide a relaxed environment where people over the age of 60 can meet and share common interests. Crucial to the success of these clubs is the hard work and dedication that volunteers bring. With new clubs opening all the time the need for new volunteers has never been greater.

Club locality Manager Tony Hanson said: ‘Clubs in Dorset are thriving. We’re delighted to have opened our first ever club in a pub earlier this year. Brendoncare clubs are small, intimate and friendly and the members get a big say in how the club runs and the activities that are provided. We want to grow the number of clubs across Dorset but we need many more volunteers to meet the demand. If you have a couple of hours spare each week then we’d love to invite you to come along and discover more about our clubs.’

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Would you like to join a friendship club for people in the South? Brendoncare Clubs are devoted to giving older people the opportunity to meet new friends, take part in activities and enjoy club outings. Here are just a small selection of clubs running in your area. Why not come along and try out one of the activities and see how you can become a member....we’d love to welcome you there. Whistlestop Club West Moors Memorial Hall, 231 Station Road, West Moors, Ferndown, Dorset BH22 0HS Tuesdays, 2pm-4pm

Penny’s Friendship Club St Mary’s Church Hall, Church Road, Ferndown, Dorset BH22 9EU Wednesdays, 2pm-4pm

Castle Club Waterford Lodge Hotel, 87 Bure Lane, Friars Cliff, Christchurch, Dorset BH23 4DN Mondays, 2pm-4pm

Juniper Jumpers Bure House, Loring Road (off Jumpers Road), Christchurch, Dorset BH23 2AZ Tuesdays, 2pm-4pm

Alpha Club Greystones Hall, Waterford Road, Highcliffe, Dorset BH23 5JL Wednesdays, 2pm-4pm

Bright Sparks Hamworthy Community Library, Blandford Road, Poole BH15 4BG Thursdays, 2pm-4pm

 We really enjoy our weekly meetings, this club is great and we thank Brendoncare for making it possible. Margaret Townsend

This is just a small selection of clubs currently running in the South with new clubs opening all the time. Visit or contact Tony Hanson on 01202 722211 to find your nearest club and become a member. Registered Charity No: 10913454 12

Where to go and what to do E`Zb:_liZ_`cc\oXd`e\jfgk`fej]fib\\g`e^Yljp WITH MORE time to do the things you want to do, life after 50 is a golden age to be enjoyed without the everyday responsibilities of being a parent or homemaker. Increasingly active and getting more out of life, the over 50s are expected to account for around 40 per cent of Dorset’s population by 2015 and the activities available to them are evolving to reflect that. Whether through extended learning, developing a sporting life, helping others, discussing the issues of the age, or simply getting out there and making the most of time, current and future generations of older adults are more active and engaged than they’ve ever been. Learning for its own sake is one of the joys of older age and explains why the University of the Third Age (U3A) courses are so popular with the over 50s. Local U3As are self-managed learning co-operatives for older people no longer in full time work that offer opportunities for members to share learning in a wide range of interests and to pursue their love of learning for pleasure. No qualifications are required for admission and none are given since fellowship and a desire to learn are the essential features and courses often develop by consensus as small groups of members gather to study. Activities – be they academic, cultural, physical or recreational – may change to suit the strengths and abilities of group leaders and the local members’ interests. Allied to this, though not restricted by age, the Café Scientifique movement takes learning out of the traditional academic environment and meetings often take place in restaurants, bars, café or theatres where, over coffee or wine, participants can explore new ideas in science and technology with a guest speaker and lively debate. Dorset has Cafés Scientifique in Bournemouth and Dorchester where recent discussions have included the use of prosthetics in sport and Dr Robert Sheldrake expounding on the theories in his book The Science Delusion. Less academic, but no less enlightening, research online has driven the boom in genealogy and Dorset is blessed with many groups that minister to the growing enthusiasm for tracing family histories. Encompassing absolute beginners as readily as experts, the Dorset Family History Society is a member of the Federation of Family History Societies with its network of contacts throughout the country. The Society, which is run from Poole's Treetops Research Centre, organises a programme of talks and discussions on particular aspects of genealogy, as well as regular coach trips to destinations such as the National Archives at Kew. There’s also a monthly computer group that offers guidance for online researchers. Of course, one of the principal joys of having time

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on your hands is finding things for those hands to make and Dorset has a myriad of arts, crafts and makers’ groups covering everything from charcoal making to embroidery. With several craft shows, fairs and seminars at which to showcase work and develop new skills, there is plenty of opportunity to share the fruits of one’s labours. Dorset is also home to a year-round cycle of wellestablished food festivals, fetes and fairs where local producers come together to sell goods and share their skills in workshops and demonstrations. Wouldbe food artisans can further explore their tastes in private lessons and cookery groups. Continuing a time-honoured tradition of giving back some of their knowledge and experience, older adults support their local communities with volunteer, community, and civic service through volunteer groups and all manner of local causes and events. The Dorset Volunteer Centre – along with the separate centres in Bournemouth and Poole – is part of a national network accredited by Volunteering England that helps voluntary and community organisations recruit and manage volunteers, as well as helping people find interesting and enjoyable opportunities to volunteer. Vacancies are advertised online at uk and in local offices where volunteers can register their interest and availability – from single days, to on-going regular commitments there are plenty of jobs to be done irrespective of age, education, background, health or wealth.



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Regular exercise and a good diet is important throughout life, but particularly so after turning 50. A few changes in the daily routine can go a long way to improving physical and mental health and Dorset’s sports centres and fitness clinics have a range of groups aimed at older adults. Of course, turning 50 is no reason to stop an already active lifestyle and there are local associations for senior cricket, football, swimming, weight training, dance, yoga, boxercise and walking among many other pursuits. Staying in touch with the community is central to preserving health into older age and Dorset’s Fiftyplus Forums are independent local groups run voluntarily by people over 50 in which members share views on local and national issues, raise concerns and get their voices heard. Funded by Dorset County Council, NHS Dorset and Age UK Dorchester, the county’s 13 Forums (and their 3000 members) aim to influence the planning, development and delivery of local services as well as provide information and a life-enhancing social and communication network for older people. The Fiftyplus Forums also work with Dorset’s POPP (Partnership for Older People Programme), which performs functions including providing an information, signposting and support service (POPP Wayfinders) and administering the Community Initiatives Commissioning Fund to seed fund local initiatives. Since 2006, some 350 projects have been provided with start-up funding, including lunch clubs, table tennis clubs, computer classes, exercise equipment and classes, memory cafés and carers’ support schemes.


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West Borough Wimborne Box Office 01202 885566 For the best in latest films and shows. Programmes include comedy, ballet, music and opera. Support YOUR local Theatre

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Visit Wimborne Minster a town for all reasons - a town for all seasons The historic market town of Wimborne Minster is an enticing blend of old and new. Shop in Wimborne’s high quality modern stores and charming independent boutiques. The colourful Town Square and attractive streets offer a diverse mix of clothing, furnishings, gifts, jewellery, crafts, books, music, florist and antique shops as well as all those handy food, hardware and everyday stores. Relax and enjoy the natural beauty of Wimborne’s setting on the River Allen and the historic architecture of the Minster Church of St Cuthburga. Enjoy a relaxing lunch, tempting afternoon tea, or a delicious evening meal in one of a range of places to eat including cafés, pubs and restaurants. Lots of places to visit, the Tivoli Theatre, the Model Town, Walford Mill and the Priests House Museum to name just a few. Festivals take place throughout the year such as the Folk Festival, Festival of Choirs, the Literary Festival, the Food & Drink Festival in October and the Diwali Festival in November.

For more information on what’s going on in Wimborne go to This advertisement is published by Wimborne BID Ltd., a Business Improvement District making Wimborne great! 15

Book now for


Easter Sunday: 31st March St.Georges Day : Tuesday 23rd April Drusilla's Mid Week Madness - 3 courses for ÂŁ13.90 (2 courses - ÂŁ10.90)

available Mon â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Fri Lunchtimes and Sun â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Thurs evenings (excl. Bank holidays) Weekend Special Menu - 3 courses for ÂŁ16.90 (2 courses - ÂŁ13.90) available Fri & Sat evenings & Sat lunchtime Quality Fresh Food â&#x20AC;˘ Real Ales â&#x20AC;˘ Fine Wines â&#x20AC;˘ Lunch & Dinner â&#x20AC;˘ Bar Snacks Function room available great for weddings & parties - no hire charge if food ordered

Traditional Wessex freehouse, friendly, with fabulous view of Horton Folly Tower Wigbeth, Horton, Wimborne, Dorset BH21 7JH Open daily 10am-11pm




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Tom, our chef is pleased to be able to offer a wide range of food and beverages all day whether you just want a quick snack or something more substantial. Set in the peaceful surroundings of Cranborne Manor Garden Centre in the village of Cranborne, East Dorset.

The Old Potting Shed Tea Room Cranborne Manor Garden Centre Cranborne, Wimborne Dorset BH21 5PP

Our tea room is open to serve cooked breakfast 9.00am to 11.30am Monday to Saturday, lunch service is between 11.45am and 2.15pm. We serve a range of light lunches from salads to something a bit more substantial such as a casserole. Last orders for tea are taken at 4.30pm.

01725 517546

Eat, drink and be happy 8c`kkc\f]n_Xkpfl]XeZp ZXe[fpfl^ff[#XjZXe Xc`kkc\f]n_Xkpfl[fek# Xj;\\9fpc\\ogcX`ej DESPITE THE avalanche of celebrity chefs and recipe books, wall-to-wall cooking programmes and the widest range of ingredients in supermarkets and specialist shops that there has ever been, research shows that most home cooks essentially prepare the same eight meals – over and over again – in rotation. Partly this is to do with speed and convenience, partly it is to do with our knowing what our families like – and perhaps, more importantly, don't like – and partly it is because there is a fear of the unknown, of getting something wrong. One of the great joys of decisions on meals being decided by a constituency of two, rather than pandering to the whims of the kids, is that one can be a little more adventurous. Delivering meat and two veg, followed by nursery puddings, may well result in a contented post-prandial nap, but it is neither the only, nor the most healthy, way to prepare food. So how does one go about expanding the canon of one's cooking, to make the transition from spare-tyre cooking to Michelin standard meals? Well the honest answer is with a good deal of work, trial and effort, and a certain change in mindset, one which can be greatly advanced by the use of eating out. Many of our dining preferences are in fact prejudices – often based on years-old bad experiences: 'I don't eat seafood because…', 'vegetarian meals are boring', 'offal is awful', 'fowl is foul' and so on. Simply because one has a bad memory of leather-hard liver with lumpy mash from school days does not mean that liver cannot be meltin-the-mouth beautiful, not to mention incredibly cheap and very high in iron. Just because one was brought up on potatoes does not mean that the

many varieties of rice and pasta cannot be equally satisfying if prepared properly and well seasoned. Merely because one has a belief that meat should be red, not white, does not mean that any number of different birds cannot be just as rich, flavoursome and delicious as a steak. So, how best to go about changing attitudes? One of the most imaginative methods is the "Anything but…" eating out system. The rules vary depending on the couple and the size of the menu in a given restaurant, but the basic principle is this: on being presented with the menu, one partner selects a given number of menu items (normally around a quarter of them) which the other person is not allowed to choose. The idea is that your dining partner tells you that you can choose 'anything but…' those items which they know you would normally choose. If any gentlemen reading this feel a little hard done by (as, by and large, it is the men who will more

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often choose the same meal over and over again), what you lose in the starter and main course, you can get your revenge for in the desserts, which is where female partiality tends to be greater. There will inevitably be failures – or other factors that further restrict the selection; those taking statins or other medicines may be unable to select certain menu items. But it is surprising how often an item which might only have been fifth or sixth on one's likely list of selections, turns out to be delicious and can be added to one's home-cooked meals… and remember, the more adventurous you are, the harder it will be for the person who is saying 'Anything but…' the next time around. It is also a good idea, assuming that one is not driving afterwards, to look at the drinks which one selects to accompany one's meal. If the restaurant has a sommelier, or a 'goes well with' wine list, give it a try. There is no doubt that if budget is the alpha and omega of the dining experience, selecting a wine that contains the word 'house' is always likely, but the difference between a house wine and one of the other items on the list is often really not that much… and if you think the recommendation is a lousy one, you can always take the difference from the tip! Once one has accepted the idea of variety and change in eating, the health benefits can start to accrue: getting one's five a day is a lot easier if one is eating lots of different meals: if mince and chips is on the menu, again, all of those five-a-day need to

be derived from elsewhere. Oh, and cows are not concentrated greens, neither is wine concentrated grapes, nor (outside the USA) does ketchup count as one of your five a day. Too much of anything is bad for you, that's why it's called too much! But very few things in food terms are evil. If you like salt, feel free to add a little, but ensure that you don't add it to already very salty prepared foods, and avoid snacks with high salt content. If you like butter, eat butter, but don't overdo it; if you dislike eating fruit, but are happy drinking fruit juice and eating veg, that's fine too. One needs a certain level of hydration during the day, but there is no need to sluice one's system out with expensive bottled water every day: food contains water, as does milk and tea and coffee. Some people counter that coffee is a diuretic… so what? Are they planning to keep all that water on board permanently? There is also a good deal of smoke and mirrors about food marketing. So-called superfoods may be good for you, but most things are in moderation. There is no single ingredient which will cure all ills: anyone who says differently is trying to sell you something. Likewise, when someone is trying to sell the idea of convenience, consider firstly how convenient it is. Washing-up aside, is a meal which takes 20 minutes to cook in the oven more convenient than one which takes 20 minutes to cook on the hob? And one doesn't have to think terribly hard to recall that when this convenience is sold at a knock-down price, there is probably something else going on. Have a think about the cost of food in general; 'value-added' foods, like premium yoghurts, are pretty much all marketing and profit. If you are paying a lot for a single ingredient – say fresh, locally sourced meat – then there is a good reason for that cost; it is likely to be of better quality and taste than the homogenised, artificially red and under-aged meat one gets wrapped in plastic. So the moral of this piece is: be informed about what you buy, be creative about what you cook and be relaxed about what you eat. Bon appetit!

Family owned country hotel set in six acres of landscaped gardens at the foot of the Purbeck Hills. Ideally situated for exploring all the beautiful Isle of Purbeck has to offer. u Special discounted rates with a local golf course. u Our own well-stocked lake just a short distance from the hotel. u 67 en-suite rooms, some with balconies overlooking the gardens and lift access, ground ďŹ&#x201A;oor rooms available.


u Indoor heated swimming pool, spa bath, steam room, gymnasium, squash courts and snooker room. u Restaurant with an extensive snack and Ă  la carte menu using many locally sourced ingredients including beef from our own farm. 2 nights from ÂŁ150 per person to include 3 course dinner, room and full English breakfast, inclusive of VAT.

For further details visit our website www.thespringďŹ

SpringďŹ eld Country Hotel Leisure Club & Spa, Grange Road, Wareham, Dorset BH20 5AL

T : 01929 552177 F : 01929 551862

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Marine Parade Lyme Regis

Al fresco dining breakfast coffee cappuccino snacks lunch cream teas sandwiches dinner & drinks 7YRHE]VSEWXWÂ&#x2020; 3TIRMRKXMQIWZEV] Marine Parade Lyme Regis Dorset DT7 3JQ England

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t: 01297 442059 e:


P O RT I Q U E Est. 1971

Jewellers, Silversmiths & Diamond Merchants

Repairs Restorations Replating Stones matched and set Sizing of Rings Pearl Rethreading Hand Engraving Valuations, Insurance & Probate t Old Gold and Silver purchased t t t t t t t t

Buyers of Secondhand & Antique Jewellery & Silverware

42 EAST STREET, WIMBORNE BH21 1DX Tel: 01202 884282 No. 5 Antelope Walk, Dorchester, Dorset, DT1 1BE

Come and visit our unique collection of designer fashions for this spring/summer. You can also complement your outfit from our range of hats, bags & stunning jewellery.

Tel: 01305 259 700 email: 20

Time to travel J`dfe;\in\ekcffbjXkk_\ X[mXekX^\jf]#Xe[k_\ fggfikle`k`\j]fi#,'$gcljkiXm\c THERE IS an urban myth that a guard on the Waterloo down train in the 1970s used to advise passengers that: 'this service is for Southampton and the continent, and for Bournemouth and the incontinent.' Both travel in general and the way that society views its older people have thankfully evolved somewhat over the last 40 years – not least because there are a lot more of us now! Whether travelling abroad or discovering new parts of the country, there is a wide range of options for the mature traveller. While 'bucket-list' favourites like seeing the Northern Lights or going to Vegas, remain popular, travel has become more sophisticated. When one gets to a certain age, relaxation tends to be found in a rather different manner to one's teenaged years. Rather than a compulsion to take to bed, it is in discovery, learning, or simply being immersed in a new environment, which provides the greatest value for money… although being perpetually pampered on a cruise does also have its merits. There is no doubt that the internet has opened up the possibility of putting one's own holiday together, and this offers opportunities for the traveller who, perhaps for the first time in a long time, is not trying to cater primarily to children. When one's time is one's own, last-minute travel opportunities can significantly bring down the cost of a break. Admittedly, last-minute cheap flights are nowhere near as common as they were, but travelling out of the peak season has other rewards too. Traditional holiday times in the southern European countries can border on being too hot – better to visit Greece, for example, in June and September, rather than July and August. Attractions at just-off-peak times will still be open, but less crowded. When, as a couple, it becomes progressively more difficult to find a holiday which combines, say, golf with horse-riding, or cultural tours with mountain climbing, it might be time to think about holidaying separately. This might sound like a frightening concept, but there are plenty of opportunities for individual travel with increasing numbers of organisations and companies dedicated to finding like-minded companions for, as it were, travelling alone together. When one has been widowed or got divorced, holidays can also seem a lonely time, but when a tour is designed around individual travellers – with none of the outrageous 'single supplement' charges, being alone in a group can also be a great way to meet new people whom you know already share your interests, or else they wouldn't be on the trip. Whether your wont is for sport, outdoor activity, language learning, archaeology, learning a new skill, visiting the home of unchanged indigenous peoples or seeing natural wonders off the beaten track, there are tours, trips and groups for pretty much everything… and they are often for people of one's own age, so there is none of the impatience of youth, nor their

9beYam_i[\hecjef0W][djb[YoYb_d]jh_f_d<hWdY[" ediW\Wh_Wbed[je][j^[h"WdZj^[WkhehWXeh[Wb_i rowdy behaviour, to destabilise the group. The cost of these tours varies enormously: one can be looking at the thick end of £2500 for a two-week guided tour of China, £1000 (without flights) for a twelve-day trek to Everest Base Camp, £750 for eight days exploring the Pyrénnées on foot, by bike, 4WD, and river raft, £530 for a five-day cycling trip around the Loire valley, or £300 for a day-trip to Rome. Finally, if you want to do more with travel than just go and come back, there are community programmes one can join – essentially gap years for grown-ups, where one can spend a much longer period volunteering for projects around the world.

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Bramley Home Care offers a bespoke, holistic and comprehensive care package tailored to your needs, enabling you to continue to live independently in your home. t t t t t t t

Excellent Quality Care Experienced Carers Administration of Medicine Domestic Help Hairdressing/Beautician Sleep in Service Sitting Service

t Waking Nights

A purpose-built nursing home run by Christchurch Housing Society, a charitable organisation.

t Preparation and Serving of Meals t Shopping & Escort to Appointments t Pet Care t Maintenance & Gardening

Delightfully set in landscaped gardens. Individualised care provided by well trained and motivated staff. Well equipped to provide for all nursing needs. Short stay and respite care by arrangement. Very attractive fee rates. En-suite rooms available.

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Call Liz Today for a Chat About our Services.




Tel. 01425 272919 Please contact Jude Powell, Matron/ Manager, Silverways Nursing Home, Silver Way, Highcliffe. Bh23 4LJ

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Care Match services available throughout Dorset and South Somerset, and homes in Dorchester, Maiden Newton, Weymouth and Yeovil.

5 YE AR â&#x20AC;&#x201C;2 S


Altogether Care is a family business established for 25 years and brings family values to life. Creating the ideal environment and support for individuals we deliver just the right balance between independent living and professional care.

01305 300161

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THE BENEFITS of exercise, being outdoors and gardening are widely documented – gardening is, for example, used as an alternative to heavy doses of anti-psychotic drugs in some low-security mental institutions, and as a means of bringing prisoners out of themselves in institutions for young offenders. Not that anyone who loves gardening needs telling this, however, as within the sanctuary of the greenhouse a menial task like potting on can allow one to reach a Zen-like meditative state… or at least forget about the worries of the modern world while one's mind is focused on a mentally unchallenging element of manual work. At times, a good deal of thought needs to be put into one's planning and planting; at other times, when weeding, mulching, mowing and composting, gardening is that most glorious of things: a thinkless task. Gardening is a year-round activity and, whilst some of the enjoyment certainly comes from having a wonderful display or a serene place in which to relax, a greater part of the joy of gardening lies in the pride one feels in knowing that the only reason the garden looks as it is is because of our own labour.. It is not just in the doing of the gardening, though, that the wider therapeutic benefits of communing with the natural world can be accrued. Visiting larger gardens, at stately homes or National Trust properties, is good from an exercise point of view,

positively uplifting and, at some times of year, can almost move one to tears. It can sometimes be a little difficult to figure out how one can translate the grand scale of planting – not to mention the hundreds of acres and decades upon decades of work – one sees at a large formal garden into a context where it will help in one's own, rather more humble plot. If only there were some middle ground where one could bimble around a spectacular garden on a more normal scale, pick up hints and tips, planting suggestions and design inspiration. Well there is: the National Gardens Scheme open gardens. With 3700 gardens nationwide opening at certain times throughout the year, there are very many within the county of Dorset that open to the public (see box overleaf). Not only are these visions easily translatable to a 'normal' garden context, but, depending on which you visit, there are many which will share soil types, drainage issues, wind direction and microclimate with your own garden. Best of all, the gardeners themselves are often on hand to explain what works and what hasn't worked, thereby saving you from making expensive planting mistakes. For the less keen gardener – or one who doesn't necessarily enjoy the cycle of manual labour

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required to keep a garden like those in the NGS in tip-top form, it is merely an excuse to enjoy the wonderful outdoor space for which someone else has done all the donkey work, and to get a nice warm glow from the knowledge that your entrance fee is supporting worthwhile local and national charities. When seeking inspiration, it is often useful not to try to transport ideas too literally; OLA, a garden by the sea, uses a dinghy as a planter to underline its maritime link, but if your garden is in, say, an area whose dominant landscape is its dairy pastures, perhaps a churn, or drinking trough might be a more appropriate planter. Another thing to look out for when visiting open gardens is to see how they have been laid out. Any plot can be made to be interesting to the eye, but it is often worth breaking up a garden so the visitor is firstly not trying to take everything in at once, but

also so you are drawing someone into the garden, so that they are eager to discover what lies beyond a hedge, trellis, fence or pergola. Remember, too, that merely because gardening is good exercise, and that you have some dramatic ideas for how to transform your garden, does not mean that you yourself have to do – both literally and metaphorically – all the heavy lifting. There is no shame if you find lawn mowing dull, rather than a route into meditative bliss… get someone else to do it. If you don't feel like putting eight tons of hardcore scalpings, old wool carpet, manure and topsoil into a raised bed – or indeed making the raised bed in the first place, then get someone who enjoys the physical and DIY side of things to do it. Gardening is fun, at all costs avoid doing things which take away from that concept.


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ȃǯǯǯ ‘Ž›ŽȱšžŠ•’¢ȱ˜ȱŒŠ›ŽȱŒ˜ž—œǯǯǯȄ Džȱ’žŠŽȱ’—ȱ‘Žȱ ŽŠ›ȱ˜ȱ˜˜•Žǯ ȱ DžȱŠœ’•¢ȱŠŒŒŽœœ’‹•Žǯ ȱ ȱ DžȱŠœŽž••¢ȱŽŒ˜›ŠŽǯ ȱ ȱ ȱ Džȱ‘›ŽŽȱ’—Ž™Ž—Ž—ȱœ™ŽŒ’Š•’œȱž—’œǯ

DžȱŠ’•˜›ŽȱŠ—ȱ’—’Ÿ’žŠ•ȱŒŠ›Žȱ™•Š—œȱ ’‘ȱŠȱ™Ž›œ˜—ȬŒŽ—›ŽȱŒŠ›ŽȱŠ™™›˜ŠŒ‘ǯ Džȱ˜ž—Žœȱ ’‘ȱ‹ŽŠž’ž•ȱŸ’Ž œȱ˜ȱ˜˜•Žȱ Š›‹˜ž›ǯ Džȱ˜–™›Ž‘Ž—œ’ŸŽȱŒ‘˜’ŒŽȱ˜ȱŸŠ›’Žȱ–Ž—žœȱ˜ěŽ›Žȱ‹¢ȱ‘Žȱ˜—Ȭœ’ŽȱŒ‘Žǯ DžȱŽ’ŒŠŽȱŒ’Ÿ’’Žœȱ˜˜›’—Š˜›œȱ™›˜–˜’— ȱȱȱȱȱšžŠ•’¢ȱ˜ȱ•’ŽȱŠ—ȱœ’–ž•Š’˜—ǯ

—Œ•žŽœȱŠ—ȱ ȱǻ•Ž›•¢ȱŽ—Š••¢ȱ —ę›–Ǽȱž—’ǰȱœ™ŽŒ’Š••¢ȱŽšž’™™Ž Š—ȱœŠěŽȱ˜ȱŒŠ›Žȱ˜›ȱ’—’Ÿ’žŠ•œȱ ’‘ȱ•£‘Ž’–Ž›ȂœǰȱŽ–Ž—’ŠȱŠ— ˜‘Ž›ȱ–Ž–˜›¢ȱŠěŽŒ’—ȱŒ˜—’’˜—œ

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Call 01929 553472 to arrange a financial review or pop into the office to talk to us at NFU Mutual Office, Units 10 & 12 Leanne Business Centre, Sandford Lane, Wareham, Dorset BH20 4DY NFU Mutual Financial Advisers advise on NFU Mutual products and selected products from specialist providers. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll explain the advice services we offer and our charges.

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NFU Mutual is The National Farmers Union Mutual Insurance Society Limited (No. 111982). Registered in England. Registered Office: Tiddington Road, Stratford upon Avon, Warwickshire CV37 7BJ. Authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority. A member of the Association of British Insurers. For security and training purposes, telephone calls may be recorded and monitored.


Save, invest, borrow or spend? <i`Z9cXZb\oXd`e\jk_\fgk`fej]ficXk\i$c`]\]`eXeZ\ THE LOVE of money may be the root of all evil, but having a heathy disrespect for living in abject poverty is certainly not one of the seven deadly sins. Most of us lie between these two extremes with the current generation in, and approaching, retirement riding the crest of a wave in terms of pension provision, certainly when compared with those that came before and those that will come afterwards. The huge majority of those already retired will have either a finite pot of money or a fixed income with which, no more employment opportunities being possible, they will have to live on until the end of their days. For those approaching retirement, there are more options, but these are also constrained by the single most important factor of any investment: the point at which one sells an investment or buys an annuity to give a monthly income. Not knowing precisely what state an investment will be in in a few years' time can be frustrating and can cause real-life financial problems. As was all-too-clearly demonstrated by the international ratings agencies' 2006/2007 motto 'Everything is going great guns… er, hang on a minute, no, everything's terrible', looking even a short distance into the future can be problematic, whether one is a supposed expert or not. When one is an individual, the import of decisions taken in a moment of exuberance can have an impact long into the future. The English language is peppered with useful idioms for the decision-making process surrounding money management. In Alice in Wonderland, the White Queen explains to Alice that: 'The rule is, jam to-morrow and jam yesterday – but never jam to-day', which is as good a metaphor for the current government's austerity measures as you are likely to find. John Maynard Keynes used 'jam tomorrow' to mock excessive saving and its effect of causing stagnation in the economy, but one supposes he

wasn't down on his uppers personally when talking about this. But in this world of historically low interest rates for savers, just what is the best thing to do with one's money: to save, to invest, to borrow or to spend? Reaching into the book of financial clichés once again, the maxim: 'Cut your coat according to your cloth' is one with which we are all familiar. Buying what one can afford and no more, has been inculcated into anyone of a certain age, but is it right? One of Jean Paul Getty's maxims was 'buy that which appreciates, lease that which depreciates'. It is just that little bit harder to determine what will appreciate these days. If your money is earning practically no interest in a savings account in number terms it could be better to spend it on something which, if not appreciating in terms of being an investment, will certainly increase in price by more than the increase in savings over a given period. In terms of investments, despite the turmoil in the world economy, the US Stock market is approaching a historical high, but does that mean one should invest in a rising market? Well, Greek and Italian government bonds are offering a pretty good yield at the moment, but investors are hardly proclaiming their virtues from the rooftops. There is risk and sometimes reward in any investment and the golden rule – in investments as in no-limits poker – is that if you are not an expert, don't play. So are there any risk-free investments out there? Investing in domestic energy efficiency is about as close as it gets; many see the installation of solar PV not as a hedge against rising energy prices (although it is that too), but as a fixed return investment over the lifetime of the installation. Equally, one might be tempted to think that with safe investments and savings offering such low returns, might one do better to remove one's money

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and put it to use in other ways? There is one idea, though, which is universally accepted to be an awful one: 'liberating' funds from a pension scheme. Laying aside for a moment the wholly legal schemes, there has been a massive upsurge in fraudulent pension fund liberation. If someone contacts you out of the blue suggesting it, do not, under any circumstances, be seduced into accepting it. Likewise if you get contacted out of the blue with a fabulously tantalising investment opportunity ask only this: 'Why are they contacting me, rather than putting all their own money into it?' The answer is that, like the pension liberation, it's a scam. In terms of genuine schemes to release equity from pension pots, there is still very little but downside to the exercise; the whole point of pensions is that they are the most tax-efficient vehicle for long-term investment. Remove your capital from that tax-free world, and HMRC will want its pound of flesh. It is always easier to turn capital into income than it is to turn income into capital. Savings, like politics, can best be equated to the long, slow boring of dried boards. It is always worth bearing in mind that there are no sure-fire winners when it comes to personal investments; for every person who buys in at the bottom of the market and sells out at the top, there are two people who have sold and the wrong moment and bought at the wrong moment. So are there ways to turn capital into income without losing the capital? One could lend one's children money to buy a house and get that money back as an income, but the word 'lend' in the context of family members nearly always has inverted commas around it. There are very real dangers of a catstrophic family breakdown if things don't work out – and there are plenty of ways this might happen without it being someone's fault.

How much money does one need to see out one's life? The answer needs to be always more than is actually needed. Why? because we no more know the moment of our passing than we do the ebbs and flows of the world financial markets. The odds of successfully calculating how much money one needs to live on until one's ultimate day, and not a penny more, are infinitessimally small. Which leads nicely to the question of care funding and inheritance tax planning. For some, the issue of having something to pass on to their children is massively important – owners of a family business, farmers and landowners. But for others, inheritance is more of an abstract concept; the Government's conversion of the Dilnot Plan from a cap of £35,000 maximum contribution to care costs to a £75,000 cap, not including the 'hotel' costs (ie the cost of shelter and food in a care home environment), means that many of the next generation are reconciling themselves pretty quickly to the idea that if their parents live for a reasonable time, there will simply be nothing left for them to inherit. Cretainly not enough to trouble the inhertance tax 'nil-band' threshold of £325,000. So it seems that whilst it is certainly increasingly difficult to survive, or at least to continue to maintain the living standards we have become accustomed to, in a world of increasing prices and diminishing savings returns, things could be an awful lot worse… we could have been born thirty years later! Perhaps the best thing we can do with some of our money is to treat our family to the occasional day out; after all, it is unlikely they will be in a position to do the same for their children when they come in turn to retire… aged 75.

Should you be concerned about Long Term Care? W

ith more of us living longer, serious consideration must be given now to how you will fund Long Term Care fees without eroding your family’s legacy. Most of us would prefer to see our home, savings and other assets eventually pass on to our family and loved ones, yet government guidelines for Long Term Care funding mean that this wish may never be a reality. For further information, or to receive your complimentary guide to Long Term Care:

KAREN CARN Associate Partner Tel: 01202 881497 Email: Web:


The Partner represents only St. James’s Place Wealth Management plc (which is authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority) for the purpose of advising solely on the Group’s wealth management products and services, more details of which are set out on the Group’s website The title ‘Partner’ is the marketing term used to describe St. James’s Place representatives.

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Upsize, downsize or extend? N_Xkj_flc[fe\Y\Xi`ed`e[n_\ekXb`e^jkfZbf]fe\jgifg\ikp6 C\\IfY\ikj\oXd`e\jk_\fgk`fej% THE CHANGING nature of the needs of a family are often fairly rapidly reflected in its car choice at different times: sporty hatchbacks become saloons and then MPVs or estates. However, making a property choice once the chicks have flown the nest is a different proposition altogether. The children may have left home, but is it for good? In today's difficult and expensive housing market, when couples split, it is possible that your children may be coming backâ&#x20AC;Ś, and they may not come back alone. On a much more positive note, pleased as one is for one's children to have left home (by which we mean, naturally, we are pleased that they have decided they are able to make own their way in the world), it would be nice if, every now and again, they might deign to come back to visit, particularly once grandchildren are on the scene. Quite apart from the fact that property decisions are of a different order of financial magnitude than cars, the levels of stress and inconvenience involved in moving, not to mention the somewhat hit-or-miss nature of selling in the current market, also make it a decision to be entered into only after a long period of careful consideration. What, then, is there to be considered and what are the options available? Hard as it may be for your offspring to consider that they would ever not want to share their own partner's bed, there can come a point when 35 years of snoring, late-night reading, television watching or a desire to bounce up with the larks, may not be quite as appealing, or tolerable, as it once was. When space is not an issue, and one is spending a lot of one's waking hours together, a good night's sleep in a separate bedroom can have a powerful draw. Your children's view of the possible uses to which 'their'

bedroom may be put, will naturally be limited to it being 'their' bedroom â&#x20AC;&#x201C; even if it is only for three weekends a year. Disabuse them of that notion by asking them fairly early on, which of their childhood items they wish to be put in storage and which they would be happy for you to dispose of. Redecorate sooner rather than later and present them with a fait accompli; it won't in any way improve their reaction, but it will resolve the issue. But this leads us to a bigger question. Once all childhood bedrooms are no longer needed as childhood bedrooms, once the back garden no longer needs to be a football pitch or a children's playground, when perhaps maybe a third of the house is no longer in regular use and when proximity to specific schools or places of employment are no longer issues, is it perhaps time to think whether the house itself is still your 'forever' house, or whether it is time either to think about moving to a house which better suits your needs, or to alter the one in which you are living. Downsizing is a popular activity for those who

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suddenly find themselves rattling around in a big empty house. On the positive side one has to spend less time keeping rooms which are never used clean, heating bills can be much lower as a smaller house is (all other things being equal) cheaper to heat. If you are downsizing within the same area as your existing home, there is also the benefit that it is likely to be much cheaper and you can either end up with a nice pot of cash or become mortgage free at a time, if you have retired, when your income is fixed and other costs are still rising. Downsizing or 'outsizing' (where you move out from a more expensive urban area to a cheaper rural area but keep the same sized property) is something that once done, cannot be undone, though. Estate agents fees, stamp duty, moving and refurbishment costs are not insignificant and should always be borne in mind when doing a cost/benefit analysis of moving. Also bear in mind additional travel and heating costs (you may be restricted as to your choice of fuel) if moving to a rural area, though. The fundamental question that needs to be resolved is that of flexibility. Will the new place function

as one suitable for two (or for one â&#x20AC;&#x201C; depending on one's circumstances), while equally being able to accommodate the full menagerie that constitutes a family Christmas? If moving to a new area, consider carefully what activities and amenities it has to offer as well. There's no point in moving to a perfect house, only to spend a good deal of one's time travelling to other places for social, leisure and shopping reasons. Perhaps a less painful route is that of adapting one's house; box rooms can be turned into en-suites or walk-in wardrobes, kitchens and decor can be updated now the whirling vortex of small children intent on literally making their mark has dissipated. You can invest in renewable energy installations to mitigate rising energy costs. All this costs money, which brings us back to downsizing in order to liberate capital with which to do these jobs. Whilst energy efficiency changes will eventually pay their way, changing decor is not necessarily going to be anything other than a cost. If one wishes to sellup later, personal choices on decor â&#x20AC;&#x201C; particularly on big-ticket items like carpets, bathrooms and kitchens, will need to match any prospective purchaser's tastes, or a buyer will simply see them as things to be redone which will cause the buyer to drop their price to accommodate the necessary expenditure. The final option is that of granny-flatting â&#x20AC;&#x201C; converting a property into two discrete, but linked, homes, one of which is the ideal size now, the other part of which can be let-out in the first instance, to bring in revenue, or into which one might choose to move should a child's family choose to move back. Granny flats can be created in a single property, where appropriate, or by building an extension. There are costs to this, but these can be recovered by letting out part of the property. Whatever you choose to do, even if it is nothing at all, it is still always worth exploring all the possibilities, just to make sure that what was once a busy family home does not end up being an expensive white elephant, preserved solely to cling on to a memory of what once was.

Is your home insurance policy good enough?

To discuss your individual requirements please call NFU Mutual in Wareham on 01929 553472 or pop in to our office at NFU Mutual, Units 10 & 12 Leanne Business Centre, Sandford Lane, Wareham, Dorset BH20 4DY NFU Mutual is The National Farmers Union Mutual Insurance Society Limited (No. 111982). Registered in England. Registered Office: Tiddington Road, Stratford upon Avon, Warwickshire CV37 7BJ. Authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority. A member of the Association of British Insurers. For security and training purposes, telephone calls may be recorded and monitored.


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01202 889404 email:



7KH0DOWKRXVH 5HVLGHQWLDO&DUH+RPH The Malthouse is ideally situated in the rural, peaceful outskirts of the Dorset town of Gillingham in Bay Road.

â&#x20AC;˘ Situated near to the beautiful Weymouth coastline â&#x20AC;˘ Comfortable rooms, most with en-suite facilities â&#x20AC;˘ Two lounges â&#x20AC;˘ Spacious new conservatory â&#x20AC;˘ Two 8-person passenger lifts giving level access to all rooms â&#x20AC;˘ Hydrotherapy baths â&#x20AC;˘ QualiďŹ ed massage, aromatherapy & reďŹ&#x201A;exology â&#x20AC;˘ 24-hour care for long-term or respite requirements â&#x20AC;˘ Day-care facilities with free transport for the elderly at home â&#x20AC;˘ Complimentary use of our own mobility scooter â&#x20AC;˘ Full and varied programme of events for residents including day trips, visits to shows and Keep Fit to Music held in the home

For further details, call Residential Proprietors,

01305 775462

Sue or Robin Hasler on or view our website and virtual tour at

14 Alexandra Road, Lodmoor Hill, Weymouth DT4 7QH National Care Association Members. NVQ Trained Staff

The historic building has a long and colourful history dating back to the 16th century and has a very beautiful, secluded rear garden which offers a tranquil area of harmony with nature including water features. Areas with ample seating and level walkways are provided to give both visitors and residents the opportunity to enjoy this area of seclusion. A courtesy car is provided for local journeys and trips to the shops, day trips, afternoons out for a cream tea and trips to local places of interest. We also offer, on a regular basis, gentle exercise and mental stimulation such as armchair keep ďŹ t sessions, quizzes, and musical afternoons. The independent living units are either apartments within the house or purpose-built lodges in the grounds. They all offer one- or two-bedroom accommodation, ďŹ nished to a very high standard and all are ďŹ tted with the nurse call system should help be required. Why not pop in for a chat and an informal tour? The Malthouse Residential Care & Respite Home Bay Road, Gillingham, Dorset, SP8 4EW Tel: 01747 822667 Fax: 01747 821270

(-&/$"*3/)064& 3&4*%&/5*"-$"3&)0.&







What is this life if full of care? 8mX`c`e^fe\j\c]f]_\cg]fife\jcfm\[fe\je\\[efkY\kiXldXk`Z`]# \ogcX`ej8c`Z\DXZd`ccXe#k_\pXi\feYfXi[n`k_k_\`[\X SUCCEEDING IN reaching a certain age has its benefits, in terms of taking things a bit easier, but also its drawbacks, as contemporaries, friends and family start to suffer the inevitable consequences of getting older. With age comes wisdom, but it is still hard to lose the inner two-year-old sometimes, as one hears oneself declaring "I'll do it', when clearly the 'it' in question might be better left to someone else. Sometimes the very hardest thing one has to do is to accept that one might need a little help. It is bad enough when the conversation is with oneself, but when the person in question needing help is a parent or a partner, it can be heart-breaking. So how does one go about convincing someone that they need help? Tempting as it is, once you have tried 'Come on, let me help you with that', to escalate to: 'What would you prefer to do today: come out to lunch at a country pub, or put your own shoes on?', that approach is never likely to go down very well. The first line of the William Henry Davies poem which forms the headline of this piece, is followed by 'We have no time to stand and stare'. The great danger as loved ones mule-headedly refuse help at home is that in fact they will have nothing but time to stand and stare, deferring doing other things because they cannot do them â&#x20AC;&#x201C; or cannot do them with the speed and ease which once they could â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and not wanting to admit to someone else, indeed to anyone else, that they cannot do them. Contrarily, it may be to those to whom they are closest that they find it hardest to admit that they need assistance. It's worth appreciating that advice about getting help is hard to take, for example, from someone whose nappies they used to change. The first thing to accept is that one should be prepared for logic to have very little impact; try to frame a question about how they are getting on as a statement about something else. Rather than saying: 'You clearly cannot cope with the garden,' try saying, 'a friend of mine has been raving about the new gardener she got to help her with the lawnmowing/leaf clearing/digging over/ weeding the herbacious borders, so now she can concentrate on planting her annuals.' Once the principle has been established successfully of delegating the banal and quotidien to someone else, in order to focus on the fun stuff, it doesn't need to be sold in quite the same way when it comes to getting someone in to do household chores like dusting and vacuuming. And once the principle of having someone in the home helping has been successfully applied, and ideally that the

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'someone' in question has proven to be personable, helpful and companionable, then having that person help in other ways becomes easier too. All the above is based on the assumption that the relation in question has the means to finance the work that needs doing. But what if they don't, or that you cannot provide some financial assiatance? How does one go about navigating the social care system on their behalf, and in such a way so as not to provoke a very strong reaction of not wanting to take charity. The primary point to consider is that it is the person receiving the care with whom local authorities will deal, so they very much need to be

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on board with the whole idea,. Someone can only get access to social care services after the local authority has assessed you (or yours) as needing one or more services that they are able to provide. Once your Local Authority has assessed these needs, they will decide whether help is needed from the services they can provide. They assess in line with their ‘eligibility conditions’ – a scale based on a risk assessment that sets out how urgent and serious the need is for certain services. This is where the terms ‘presenting needs’ and ‘eligible needs’ appear. Presenting needs are the

issues and problems identified when you contact or are referred to social services for help. Eligible needs are those listed in a local authority’s eligibility conditions which mean it has a duty to meet these needs. There are four bands based on how serious an assessed person’s need for support is: Low, Moderate, Substantial or Critical. In these tough times, they need to focus their attention on the Critical and Substantial need cases, but what does that mean? The authority will compare the risks to a person’s independence, health, safety, their ability to manage daily routines and whether they get involved in family life and their community life with the eligibility criteria. If a person is eligible for services, local authorities should record and develop care plans in line with the assessment process. A person’s eligibility to services might be affected by the level of support they get from their existing carers and a separate assessment of the needs of the person’s carers may be done. A local authority should not take your financial situation into account until they have carried out your assessment, only once they have established what care needs there are will they decide how much you should contribute towards that care. There is, clearly, more to it it than this, but these are the basic steps towards sorting out care. For more information for your particular local authority, contact the relevant team from the box below, where there are also some contact details for carer support organisations.

LJ<=LCELD9<IJ#8;;I<JJ<J8E;FK?<I:FEK8:K@E=FID8K@FE Bournemouth Borough Council Minicom:

01202 454979 Monday-Thursday 8.30-5.15, Friday 8.30-4.45 02202 454974, Fax: 01202 454975



Call in or write to: Bournemouth Care Direct, Town Hall Annexe, St. Stephen's Road, Bournemouth, BH2 6EA Borough of Poole Council Minicom:

01202 633902 Monday-Thursday 8.30am - 5.15pm Friday 8.30am - 4.45pm 18001 01202 633902 Fax: 01202 633634



Write to: Adult Social Care Helpdesk, Borough of Poole, Civic Centre Annexe, Park Road, Poole, BH15 2RT Dorset County Council Text: 01305 267933, Minicom:

01305 221067 Monday-Friday 8am-7pm Fax: 01305 264607 01305 267933



Write to: Source Helpline, PO Box 7184, Dorchester, Dorset, DT1 1GA sçSt John Ambulance 01305 7511600 mmm$i`W$eh]$ka%i`W%Yekdj_[i%Zehi[j%YWh[hi#ikffehj#fhe]hWcc[$Wifn sçCarers UK 0808 808 7777 mmm$YWh[hika$eh] sçCarers Direct 0808 802 0202 mmm$d^i$ka%YWh[hiZ_h[Yj%FW][i%9Wh[hi:_h[Yj>ec[$Wifn sçSkills for Care mmm$ia_bbi\ehYWh[$eh]$ka sçPrincess Royal Trust for Carers 0844 800 4361 mmm$YWh[hi$eh] sçHealthpoint 01202 675377 mmm$Xehek]^e\feeb[$Yec%b[_ikh[#WdZ#Ykbjkh[%b_XhWh_[i%    #beea_d]#\eh#_d\ehcWj_ed%^[Wbj^#_d\ehcWj_ed%^[Wbj^fe_dj sçThe Education Service 01305 224422 or 01202 870130 sçDepartment for Work & Pensions 0845 606 0265 mmm$Zmf$]el$ka 36

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jĂ?Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x2013;Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;Â&#x2020;jÂ?ÂŹĂ&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă&#x2039; Ă jÂ??Ă&#x17E;Ă&#x2039;?Â&#x2122;aĂ&#x2039;jÂ&#x2122;Â&#x17D;Â?Ă&#x;Ă&#x2039; Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;Ă jĂ?Â&#x2030;Ă jÂ&#x201D;jÂ&#x2122;Ă? Our team of experts is ready to help you with all aspects of: VĂ&#x2039;8Â&#x2030;Â?Â?Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;?Â&#x2122;aĂ&#x2039;?Ă&#x201E;Ă?Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;~Ă&#x2039;+Â?Ă?jĂ Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;Â?wĂ&#x2039;Ă?Ă?Â?Ă Â&#x2122;jĂ&#x; VĂ&#x2039;+Ă Â?Ă?jWĂ?Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;~Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;?Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x201E;jĂ?Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;wÂ?Ă Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;w?Â&#x201D;Â&#x2030;Â?Ă&#x;žĂ&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;wĂ&#x2013;Ă?Ă&#x2013;Ă jĂ&#x2039;MjÂ&#x2122;jwÂ&#x2030;Ă? VĂ&#x2039; ?Ă&#x17E;Â&#x2030;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2030;Ă&#x201E;Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;~Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;Ă?j?Â?Ă?Â&#x2020;Ă&#x2039;ÂŽÂ&#x2030;Â&#x2122;WÂ?Ă&#x2013;aÂ&#x2030;Â&#x2122;~Ă&#x2039;jÂśĂ&#x2013;Â&#x2030;Ă?Ă&#x;Ă&#x2039;Ă jÂ?j?Ă&#x201E;jĂ&#x2039;Ă&#x201E;WÂ&#x2020;jÂ&#x201D;jĂ&#x201E;ÂŻ VĂ&#x2039; ?Â?Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;~Ă&#x2039;?Â?Â?Ă&#x2039;Â&#x2122;jWjĂ&#x201E;Ă&#x201E;?Ă Ă&#x;Ă&#x2039;?Ă Ă ?Â&#x2122;~jÂ&#x201D;jÂ&#x2122;Ă?Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;wÂ?Ă Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;wĂ&#x2013;Ă?Ă&#x2013;Ă jĂ&#x2039;Ă jĂ&#x201E;Â&#x2030;ajÂ&#x2122;Wj VĂ&#x2039;Ă&#x2039;Â?Â?Â?Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;~Ă&#x2039;?wĂ?jĂ Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;Ă??Ă&#x17E;Ă&#x2039;?ww?Â&#x2030;Ă Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;wĂ Â?Â&#x201D;Ă&#x2039;Ă?Â&#x2020;jĂ&#x2039;WÂ?Â&#x201D;ÂŹÂ?jĂ?Â&#x2030;Â?Â&#x2122;Ă&#x2039;Â?wĂ&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039; 0?Ă&#x17E;Ă&#x2039;-jĂ?Ă&#x2013;Ă Â&#x2122;Ă&#x2039;Ă?Â?Ă&#x2039;Â&#x2122;Â&#x2020;jĂ Â&#x2030;Ă??Â&#x2122;WjĂ&#x2039;0?Ă&#x17E;Ă&#x2039;?Â&#x2122;aĂ&#x2039; ?ÂŹÂ&#x2030;Ă??Â?Ă&#x2039;?Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;0?Ă&#x17E;Ă&#x2039;?aĂ&#x153;Â&#x2030;WjÂą VĂ&#x2039;Ă&#x2039; ?Â?Â?Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x2013;Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;wÂ?Ă Ă&#x2039;?Â&#x2122;Ă&#x2039;Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;Â&#x2030;Ă?Â&#x2030;?Â?Ă&#x2039;aÂ&#x2030;Ă&#x201E;WĂ&#x2013;Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x201E;Â&#x2030;Â?Â&#x2122;Ă&#x2039;?Â&#x2122;aĂ&#x2039;?Â?Â?Â?Ă?Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x2013;Ă&#x201E;Ă&#x2039;Ă?Â?Ă&#x2039;ÂŹĂ&#x2013;Ă?Ă&#x2039;Ă&#x;Â?Ă&#x2013;Ă Ă&#x2039;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2030;Â&#x2122;aĂ&#x2039; ?Ă?Ă&#x2039;j?Ă&#x201E;jÂą

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A moving target >\kk`e^Xifle[[f\jefk^\kXep\Xj`\iXjpfl^\kfc[\i#Ylkk_\i\ Xi\nXpjkfjkfg`k^\kk`e^_Xi[\i#Xj8CIljj\cc[\jZi`Y\j IT CAN be hard to remember the moment that the act of sitting down or getting up was first accompanied by a noise that once only signalled the lifting of heavy weights, but it comes to us all; for some, it is in their forties, for others, a little later. It is nature's way of saying: 'don't buy a low-down sofa with soft cushions'. Mildly irritating as this is, though, there are many more important issues to do with aging and mobility… or more precisely, aging and an imperceptibly slow reduction in mobility. Some mobility issues are food-and-drink related, or lifestyle-and-fitness related, others are the result of a predisposition to one of a cluster of different ailments. Depending on which of the last of these one is suffering with, problems with mobility can treated with medication or, in extreme cases, surgery. Where there are chronic or difficult-to-treat mobility issues – where in other words it isn't going to get any better, the issue becomes one of improving the environment in which one lives. In short, therefore, dealing with mobility can be summed up as: prevention, mitigation, treatment and adaptation.

First of all, though, perhaps it is sensible to examine what we mean by mobility. In the abstract, it is a combination of strength, flexibility and stamina: the strength to move oneself around, the stamina to do so over distance and actually to be able to do something once one has got somewhere, combined with the flexibility to get up, turn round, reach up or bend over. The biomechanical process of doing all these things is based on the body's bones, muscles, joints, cartilage, tendons and ligaments all working normally; introduce a weakness – whether in the form of a specific weakness like a hip problem or historical ligament damage, and mobility is reduced. There is another issue, though, that of pain. Sometimes there is a very good reason for pain – a sharp warning from the body that one is about to damage something very important, but there is also a vicious cycle, which comes from pain avoidance. Here the pain may well be real, but its effect is to limit movement further, which weakens muscles, robs the sufferer's body of flexibility, and starts a cycle of movement avoidance that inexorably reduces the scope of the person to move around. Some of this can be caused by lifestyle; the trinity of health bugbears – obesity, smoking and drinking, all play their part in reducing mobility. Extra weight can cause a loss of fitness and place much greater strain on the mechanical functions

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of the body, heavy alcohol consumption has been linked to muscle necrosis and, particularly in men, to increases in bone loss and fracture and muscle pain while smoking has been cited as an increased risk factor in the incidence of rheumatoid arthritis, degenerative disc disease and osteoporosis, not to mention the obvious reduction in lung capacity, which reduces the stamina and thus the likely levels of exercise and the strength and flexibility that the exercise provides. Lifestyle factors are as important when it comes to managing any form of movement restricting ailment as the underlying predisposition to the ailment in the first place. The message is: if you are in pain, find out from a doctor why you are getting that pain, but also meet the medical profession halfway by reducing those behaviours which may be exacerbating it, and by taking seriously pain which is regular, debilitating, constant or unexplained. Simply managing the levels of pain alone, even before addressing the underlying issue, can have immensely positive effects on shortterm and long-term mobility. Where the underlying problem is one of overuse – knee pain through running on too-hard surfaces, for example, repeating the cause of the pain is only ever going to make it worse. Exercise in the abstract is good, but where, in the context of the cause of the pain, exercise is actually the problem, try a lowerimpact form. Where there is another obvious causal factor – say a mobility impairment caused by poor posture, limited lumbar support in bed or an uncomfortable working or leisure environment, try to address that at the same time as the pain itself, or you will quite literally only be treating – or indeed just masking

– the symptoms, and the problem will continue to become aggravated. So there are three approaches to dealing with mobility-limiting pain: moderate the behaviour, mitigate the pain, or both. After all, if a friend were to say to you: 'every time I bang my head on the wall, it hurts,' you might quite quickly conclude that it was time for that person to stop banging their head on the wall. On the other hand, if someone gets a shooting muscle pain every time they lean forward brusquely, you might suggest that they practise gently leaning forward to improve their flexibility, not that they stop ever leaning forward. Sometimes, though, there are clearly issues which are not going to go away, and it is time to start thinking about not adapting behaviours, but about adapting the environment in which that person lives, or the way in which that person does certain things. So, if someone is clearly unable to stay standing for a long time, or to get up and sit down without aid, or walk long distances for a reason other than being unfit, it is clearly not a brilliant idea for them to be forced to do it. Neither, though, should that person simply give up doing these things. There are plenty of mobility aids that permit a person to continue largely normally with his or her day-to-day activities, by removing the need for a disproportionate effort into doing something others would consider banal. Lifting chairs, mobility chairs and scooters, frames and support handles around the home may deal a blow to one's ego, but there is nothing more damaging to health than being isolated and unable to do the simplest tasks, particularly when it is entirely avoidable. Grants may be available for adaptations to homes and vehicles to ensure a person can continue with their daily life, not least because health and social care professionals know that nothing is more expensive than in-patient care, and few things better for the mental and physical health of someone than (figuratively, if not always literally) that person being able to stand on their own two feet.

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Senior moment


YOU KNOW you’re getting old when someone asks you to write a column about getting old. In fairness, I’m doing the editor a slight disservice; his request for ‘a wry look at life after 50’ hardly suggests misty eyes, a comfy chair with an antimacassar and a bag full of Werther’s Originals. And 50 is the new 35, although that argument was less successful when trying to overturn a speeding fine. But when it comes to getting old, I have set my personal bar at two specific levels: When the new Pope looks like he could beat me over a 50-metre dash, it’s time to buy a car coat and, secondly, when there is more hair sprouting from my nose and ears than my head, I will buy some elasticated slacks to complement it. I actually blazed a fiery trail through the 50 barrier in 2008 on a night I still can’t remember and I am proud to say that my wife’s 50th birthday two years later was spent turning our knuckles white at Alton Towers. Of course, this is a wonderful county to grow wrinkles. I actually came here to retire in 1987, but my company’s pensions department was adamant that 27 was a bit young to be doing so. No selling job had been needed to lure me to Dorset; the place was in my blood from an early age. We travelled down from Manchester every year for six years; each time it was for the same two weeks of August, the same guest house in Southbourne and the same beach hut. Somehow we managed to ship seven of us – four children, my mum and dad and a flatulent granddad – in the family saloon, presumably with the two youngest strapped to the roof rack with the luggage; to this day, my kid brother still can’t comb his hair forward. It may have flown in the face of European health and safety regulations, but we were tough Northerners and nothing was going to keep us from our holiday in beautiful Dorset. I swear at least two days of the fortnight were taken up with travelling. One time we split up the eight-hour journey with an overnight stop in a lay-by. I can only assume my brother and sister were left on the roof overnight. To be honest, though, I don’t remember much beyond a haze of happy smiles and playing on the beach. I do remember getting into trouble for burying my baby brother up to his neck in the sand, but I now


realise I would probably have got away with it had I buried him feet first. I had no idea what Dorset’s 'tourism offer' was back then, nor did I care. Wet weather facilities? Hell, we had a beach hut. If there was sand, sea, sun and a plentiful supply of ice lollies, I was happy. Although to be fair, my only other experience of the seaside had been Blackpool: it had the Tower, the shows and donkeys on the beach, but it also had sea water the colour of weak tea. When I paddled in at Bournemouth for the first time, I ran out screaming in terror. My Dad had to take me back in and explain that those pasty white things scurrying around my legs were indeed my feet. Mind you, it was also my Dad that convinced me every one of the six years we came to Dorset that the builders would have Corfe Castle finished by the time we arrived the following year. For those willing to make the annual pilgrimage – and thousands upon thousands did – the county was a place of refinement, its pristine beaches and beautiful gardens just two of the many reasons why we kept coming back. We couldn’t afford the shows – my money-conscious Dad maintained that the Punch and Judy qualified as a theatrical experience – and eating out was beyond the family wallet. But it would be difficult to think of any better way for a youngster to enjoy an annual holiday. Fifty years on, it’s hard not to smile at Bournemouth tourism’s ‘Let There Be Love’ hook to visitors, some of whom need little encouragement given the paucity of clothing they’re wearing. But that’s an old man’s jaundiced view and I’ve a lot more Dorset summers and bracing walks along the coast to tackle yet. The trouble is, whilst a double episode of Coronation Street and a glass of fortified wine is about the height of my excitement level these days, I like to think of myself as the man who once kissed Annie Lennox, who swam naked at midnight in the Caribbean Sea and who once shared a shower with Bobby Charlton and George Best. Neal Butterworth was editor of the Bournemouth Daily Echo for almost fourteen years until late 2011 and is now a freelance writer, editor and speaker. Find out more at:

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Fresh air and fantastic care


Senior Living 2013  

The fact-packed magazine aimed at those who want to create memories, not just relive them

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