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FEATURING... AN APOLOGY REAL SUBMISSIONS NO BABYLON 5 DOCTOR WHO

BEHI N BARS D SPEC IAL

e h t t o g e W “ ” ! d a r t s Ba

SIVE EXCLU

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ISSUE 5

WE CAUGHT THE BASTRAD, SO NO MORE RUXPIN BOLLOX.

! TICE!! S U J O GHT T RY STORY U O R IN B SOR RUXP THE FULL READ E.... INSID


FANWNAK 5 The Fanzine that just won’t furking die! EDITORIALWNAK Hi everyone! It’s me Adric!... You know... The

deceased stowaway Alzarian!... Who? What do you

mean Who? It’s me ADRIC!!, that handsome young chap in the trendy pyjamas with an obsession for

collecting gold stars... No? Oh, forget it, well guess

what? I’ve bagged the much coveted title of being FANWNAK’s new guest editor! It looks like being

dead isn’t really an issue when it comes to work

This editing malarky is a piece of Bandril p*ss

anymore, just look at Rory Williams, Pond or whatever the frigging frig his name is….

Anyway, thanks to good old Block Transfer

Computation, someone saved a back-up copy of

me onto floppy disc and accidentally loaded me up instead of

their old CV at Pharos, so I’m back again and I’m helping to address the resurrected

character equilibrium in the universe.

Right, now that i’ve dealt with all the submissions in just under fifteen seconds, it’s time

to relax. Ahhhh… that’s better… I’ve just taken an E and I feel like I’m floating in space

again. E-space in fact! Oooweee oooohhh oohh weee oohhh, Laa laaa laaa, ohhh….. Leela!, Cybermen! eek!! Oh, That takes me back, or forward, I can never remember, my mind’s

shot to pieces after being eaten by a Dinosaur and dying a couple more times in fan/audio-

unofficial- it’s not on the telly, so it didn’t happen fiction. Phew!

Hmmm… now that i’ve put my feet up I can honestly say that this must be the easiest

job in the universe! Well, it doesn’t take a numerical Alzarian to tell you that I will be a

101.2424% improvement on the previous editor! Speaking of which…. Where is it? Ahhh, here it is…. I have just received the following shocking letter on the next page… Peace and love

Adric

P.S. I’m pretty shite at design, so don’t expect anything fancy. OK?

P.P.S. FANWNAK has conquered A4 and A6 and now A5 in it’s chequered history, and I

hope you enjoy this easy to dispose of format. Why not set fire to it now to add to the excitement of reading it?

P.P.P.S I don’t do refunds and sales of FANWNAK now officially outstrip Doctor Who Insider.

CNUTRIBUTORS We are contractually obliged to thank the following that made FANWNAK 5 the joy to behold it probably is: David Adams, David Nagel, Tony Jones, Huw Buchtmann, Brian Foghammer, Fenton, Gary Brick, Zodron the Zygon Killer and Adric.

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APOLOGYWNAK

Dear FANWNAK reader,

and WNAK has been arrested, tried m you that the last editor of FAN uerading as an old Hasbro masq It is with great regret that we infor bear The ion. evas fee ce petty theft and TV licen in New Ferr y convicted for copyright misuse, lary at his potting/printing shed ehended by Cheshire Constabu appr been has pin, Rux y Tedd style images and on the Wirral. in possession of BCB copyright unknown) has also been caught Cheshire with ing work Teddy Ruxpin (real name as yet been have BCB p jail cell at HMP Liverpool. The got the is now residing in a cold dark dam a number of years and finally they outs of this wanted criminal for reab whe the track to oy his vile unfunny depl to Constabulary ade char this uses he but be a Doctor Who fan and is keen Bastrad! Mr Ruxpin purports to deems this behaviour unacceptable science fiction lovers. The BCB humour on unsuspecting cheap its brand by stuffed bears. n, with to stamp out any further abuse of ine going by the name of Panic Moo an editor of another cheapo fanz by off tip a ted by Ruxpin initia was ” The Police were given “war this tly, aren ng a one-sided war with. App c whom Teddy Ruxpin has been wagi ate price was highlighted by Pani of FANWNAK and the extortion issue first the the 3, of ity Issue qual on ble ons varia when the just begun preparati hed the incumbent editor who had w Moon. When the news of this reac and seeking shelter amongst fello ties all ng cutti g, cryin off run t response from Mr Burditt was to 3 was now in real trouble, a gues Issue AK WN FAN that e brok s n the new DOOMWATCH brethren. Whe pin. Rux y shad the ped Burditt and in step from editor was quickly selected by Mr g the few remaining submissions FANWNAK with a final issue usin Ruxpin was set the task to see off street. ious editor as he ran off down the Christmas by Mr Burditt, his the mailbag dropped by the prev ght to be safely wrapped up for thou was pin Rux , ished publ y tape Ruxpin hatched a When issue 3 was stick and r pape g ately, while wrapped in suffocatin of the night Ruxpin managed le work being complete. Unfortun midd the in order to peddle new filth. In AK WN FAN ped and on carry to plan dastardly to discover that Ruxpin had esca printer. Mr Burditt was horrified cake. olate choc of to break free and stole a laptop and slice a and tea of t about it all after a nice cup of nicked his stuff but promptly forgo . Despite having no formal base rground to work on FANWNAK unde t wen ntly eque subs pin L & TOMTIT with Issue 4 Rux DRI BAN of ery deliv the on pois about a scheme to operations and no money he set insert his issues unfortunately, has to intercept the mail deliveries and to be of FANWNAK. His dastardly plan e, of which the guilty party has yet accomplice at the local Post Offic an ired and ” requ Bear pin the Rux ert ed. “Rup work as s partially inal who pose might actually be the wanted crim DRIL & brought to justice. We suspect this means that nearly all issues of BAN now this ly, ious Obv him. for is horrified and ine Fanz L DRI the Police are still out looking BAN of r edito this nasty little publication. The with ted affec been have TIT TOM found it hilarious. TION the editor of TOMTIT Fanzine k Police sting codenamed “OPERA day was brought about by a crac Mon on s a TV drive o (wh , Mud Mr The arrest of Mr Ruxpin user t men allot tion to his operations as a fellow atten n stigating inve draw lst had Whi . pin Rux shed the OX” BOL coming from heard the Doctor Who theme tune noticed that Ruxpin's Mud Mr e, Licence Fee detector van by day) Strip Red of cans e n the local shop buying mor ition for his patch when Ruxpin was dow and were in a noticeably poor cond an unknown brand called "Adric" as with lled alarm labe the d were raise ages Mud cabb of Mr rows toes either and pin wasn't looking after his Pota the Police. acted cont tely the time of year. It looked like Rux edia imm then who t and Leisure Gardeners, and The National Society of Allotmen e lay in wait for Ruxpin to return OX swung into action. The Polic BOL ION m RAT 16m a OPE of t that fron then in was ting It d, masturba shed, to discover Ruxpin was nake (presumably Eskimo then bashed down the door to the evidence and 106 rusty film cans for d scate confi were ter prin the team, who ingested by d roye projector. His laptop and dest tely edia 1960s era Doctor Who) were imm as lled labe miscan rest easy now. osely AK purp WN , Porn y, readers of FAN and cans of Red Stripe. Hopefull the negatives with raw Cabbage mer Brian Fogham Brian Foghammer on Inc. Wackybacky Toys Plc Ltd. Corporati

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Image of David Yates stolen off the internet. Can’t remember where from. Who cares anyway?

What a movie means for Doctor Who

W

2. How Doctor Who stories are told will be changed by a film. 3. If the movie is a reboot, the character of the Doctor will become a character that can be recreated whenever a new writer or director wishes, like anyone can do with Sherlock Holmes or Robin Hood.

hen David Yates first announced his attempt to make a Doctor Who movie, many fans were worried that 50 years of history would be trampled upon. While Steven Moffat’s subsequent comments have said that any Doctor Who movie would be a continuation of the television show, there remains one important facet of the announcement. A Doctor Who movie would change the Doctor. In November 2011, David Yates spoke with the Daily Variety and announced that he is working on a movie version of Doctor Who. Big changes would be happening to the story of the Doctor: David Yates: It [a Doctor Who movie] needs quite a radical transformation to take it into the bigger arena. … Russell T. Davies and then Steven Moffat have done their own transformations, which were fantastic, but we have to put that aside and start from scratch" This was big news. For fans, it seemed that 50 years of history would be trod upon. But a movie could mean more than continuity ignored. For Doctor Who, a movie would fundamentally change everything. Okay, this sounds like hyperbole. But Doctor Who is a television series told in television ways. A movie cannot be a carbon copy of the television show, and if it is successful (both as a film and in the box office), Doctor Who as an ongoing tale will change more than it has ever done before. There are three ways that a movie will change Doctor Who: 1. The primary focus for the public will become two competing media (television and film).

No Longer a Television Series A movie would not be the first time that Doctor Who is produced outside of television. Doctor Who is not just a television series. It is already a story with novels, comics, audio dramas and more. However, these spin-off media are not the same as a movie. These other stories are specifically for fans, people who are drawn to the television series and want more. These media have smaller audiences, they are less mass-market and more tailored for the most engaged group of Doctor Who viewers. Doctor Who remains a television series for the general public, and a movie will change this all. Movies are big things. Books and comics sell in the range of the low thousands, except if they are major best-sellers. While movies can flop, many have audiences in the millions at the cinema alone, which is then complimented in the DVD/Blu-ray market, through downloads and on repeat showings on television channels. Meanwhile, Doctor Who television episodes have in the order of ten million viewers. Suddenly, with a movie, Doctor Who will appear in two major competing media: television and film. While the existing books, comics and audio compliment the television series, a movie would be competing for the audience’s attention. The Story is No Longer the Same I grew up with Doctor Who in the 1980s. For me, stories spread across weeks and separated by 7


cliffhangers were the norm for the series. Since Doctor Who returned in 2005, the style of the show changed. Most stories were self contained. Only a few would involve multiple episodes. The stories themselves were shorter, more intensely told. How Doctor Who was being told was changed. Yet it still remained a television series. We usually get fourteen episodes a year, with a varying degree of a story arc, from character evolution to tricky timey-wimey story telling. While we miss out on longer individual stories, we get a longer, interconnected series. Telling movies is different to how stories are told on television. They are more self contained — few movies have pre-defined ongoing stories like Star Wars, The Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. Some movies will provide a tease, a potential foreshadowing of a potential sequel, yet movies must remain complete in their own right. Audiences would be frustrated by not seeing a character arc completed within the current film. Television episodes are regular, while movies in a series can be separated by years. A Doctor Who movie will be self contained. It will be made as a one-off story (even with some tentative hooks for the future). We also often talk about how movies have bigger scopes. Traditionally, a television show will describe the events happening off screen. Characters will tell of the invading hoards. Movies, on the other hand, show the armies fighting. Today, television is getting closer, now showing the invading armies (albeit still in a scaled-down version), though movies hold the upper edge. With each step that television moves closer, films react. They are becoming bigger and bigger in scale, becoming more spectacle. A Doctor Who movie will change the scope of the Doctor’s adventures, and the television series will look smaller in comparison. This is the biggest difference between television to movies. The great writer Dennis Potter, who dedicated himself to television, considered that how television and films were shown illustrated the fundamental difference between the two media. Television is a technology where the pictures are projected from the box into the audiences’ eyes. Film is light projected onto a screen, and we only

see the reflection. For film, we are only observers. We are part of a faceless crowd, sitting in the dark, watching a spectacle. For television, we are often watching as part of a group. We participate with the show and more-visible audience. We interact with the environment around us while watching television. And while television ratings now include more time shifting, the majority of the audience still watches at the same time. The feel of the two media is very different. A Doctor Who movie will be more spectacle. It will be a less shared, less communal story. No Longer the Same Person Let’s ignore the Peter Cushing Dr Who and the Daleks films for a moment. Right now, the Doctor is a single character. Through the invention of the regeneration concept, we can have new actors in the role, while the character remains the same person. Despite the (occasional) dodgy continuity, we have a roughly consistent universe. This is different to Sherlock Holmes. With each new actor, the Holmes universe is given a reboot. While Arthur Conan Doyle’s novels and short stories are the “canon”, each successive movie or television series or comic is something new. Young Sherlock Holmes. Holmes fighting Nazis. Holmes in modern-day London. Each version is a reinvention. Different universes using the same creative spark. Doctor Who is different. It is the same story with the same person at its heart. Fans even work out ways to fit in the TV Comics into the single ongoing story. We can do this through the tools of regeneration and time travel. The series can reinvent itself without rebooting. But what if someone like David Yates decides to restart the story for a film? Suddenly, the character of the Doctor is split. He instantly becomes like Sherlock Holmes or Robin Hood. The Doctor transforms into a concept rather than a character. The Doctor is no longer the hero of an ongoing tale, with layers being added by successive stories. The Cushing films were different — they are a reinvention of the character as if the Doctor was like 8


Sherlock Holmes or Robin Hood. Cushing’s Dr Who was a distinct character, a human inventor with two human granddaughters. This happened in the 1960s, before the first Doctor regenerated into the second. The films themselves were superseded by later Doctor Who and regeneration. But if the story is rebooted for a film today, the Doctor Who universe will not be one. There will no longer be an ongoing single story. There are no other ongoing characters like the Doctor, and a film (especially a successful one) would stop that. He would become another Sherlock Holmes or Robin Hood. Special, but no longer different.

fifty-eighth Doctor or the 9¾th Doctor. The character can just exist in the Doctor Who universe, and the audience can create the necessary connections to reconcile the stories. Secondly, the film should not be the origin story of the Doctor. Such mysteries should remain. Revealing too much will undermine the essentials of the character. While Neil Gaiman was writing “The Doctor’s Wife”, he received the following note from Steven Moffat on the Corsair: … can we make the Corsair sound less like the man the Doctor modeled himself on? Answers too many question that should be left alone. He’s the Doctor, he does what he does for reasons too vast Where Should a Movie Should Go? and terrible to relate. But in the end, a Doctor Who movie should be Change is good. It brings new life to things. It lets looking forward. It should not be too concerned us discover new avenues. A Doctor Who movie with the past, just like the television series. It should could certainly work, even if it changes the not focus on origins but instead focus on audience’s relationship with the television series. adventures. It should expand the Doctor Who But the movie still needs to be Doctor Who. universe, not replace. There is no need for the Doctor Who story to If done right, a Doctor Who movie will mean that restart. Doctor Who is no longer just a television series, and Firstly, the movie’s producers can create a unique it is a modern myth. story in the Doctor Who world. The show’s format allows for that to occur. The movie’s producers do not even need to create an obvious link with the Huw Buchtmann writes the website television series. They don’t even need to specify thirteenfaces.com, where he explores what whether the film Doctor is the twelfth Doctor or the makes Doctor Who the story it is.

MULTIPLEADVERTISEWNAKFUNDINGWNAK

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BIGFINISHREVIEWWNAK

Situation Vacant? Following Death in Blackpool there is a vacancy in the TARDIS to accompany the Eighth doctor on his travels, and what better way to fill it than testing out four new candidates Apprentice style?! Needless to say this story is a lot of fun and allows Paul McGann great license to trot out his best Lord Sugar impression. That with a smattering of monsters, robots and challenges makes for some great listening. Summary Absolutely full credit has to go to Alan Barnes who follows Death in Blackpool with another tremendous piece of writing. Here whilst acknowledging that Lucie Miller has moved on, the Doctor soon finds himself involved in a recruitment exercise involving four very different candidates for the post of new assistant, and there are more secrets to be uncovered than in a typical Edwardian detective mystery. The set-up keeps you guessing all the way through and you are tempted to be too clever by trying to spot other characters that

might be better suited to being the new assistant. It certainly kept me on my toes at the time. Meanwhile we have aliens, disappearing scientists and giant robots all presenting challenges to the candidates. Oh, and did I mention that the Doctor hadn’t even set this up! Overall rating This story easily gets 4.5/5 – since originally writing this I have heard the rest of the fourth series which got better and better, so I save the 5/5 for one or two later stories. However, as an experience I enjoyed this so much I listened to it twice; first pass once I spotted the emerging Apprentice spoof I was chuckling all the way through. I won't give away the end, suffice it to say that all the candidates are great and I didn't remotely spot who the winner would be. Lucie Miller may be gone, but the Eighth Doctor continues in style! Review copyright 2011 Tony Jones redrocketrising.wordpress.com

The Rescue Region 2 DVD (2009) With so many enhancements and format transitions over the years, it’s important to remember how certain episodes started out. A positive change on this edition of The Rescue is the return of the lead-in to The Romans, excised on the original VHS. As a new viewer in the Nineties, I was oblivious to the curtailed ending. On this version, a fresh audience will be unaware that the inlay shots of the crash site have been stabilised, as there is no before and after option as on previous DVDs. Despite the clear improvement to the story, this illustrates the fine line between restoration and replacement. A highlight on the disc is the commentary guests’ comparison of The Rescue with the new series. Briefly reflecting on designing for black and white TV, Raymond Cusick describes

his reaction to the 2005 Daleks, and the suggestion is that unearthliness, a hallmark of the Sixties series, is somehow lacking in the current one. It’s true that to stay relevant, the revived Doctor Who has kept close ties with Earth and humanity, and trips to more remote or challenging places have been scarce. By contrast, the early stories were able to go anywhere, and this is surely why they continue to offer so much. The Rescue may itself be regarded as primitive science fiction, but with a repertoire of creepy landscapes, rocket ships and ominous beings, it certainly looks more comfortable in the genre. The visuals are critical to its success. The commentary team single out the music and lighting, and these elements help to establish a genuine sense of dread, particularly for Koquillion. On this occasion, his hunched pose, jutting head and long claws reminded me of Ivan Bilibin’s Kikimora, and it’s fitting that a pretend monster should resemble something from folklore. At various stages, Koquillion appears to alter the momentum, with the cut as he swipes the stones out of Vicki’s hands; as he emerges from his secret passage; and with the rising camera as he approaches the Doctor in the finale. 10


Raymond Cusick admits that his spaceship door is too flimsy (Bennett’s trapdoor is similar), but his slanting set, with its blasted midsection is highly plausible, and the repetition of shapes in the set and on the exterior of the model connects them on screen. The DVD gallery provides comprehensive photographs of the model, along with some amusingly chummy-looking shots of Koquillion with his arm around Vicki. A further bonus is a PDF of Cusick’s striking production drawings. The acting is equally good. The rockfall sequence allows Jacqueline Hill and William Russell to create profound unease. Their characters’ responses are totally credible, with alarm and repulsion at Koquillion, and Ian’s outright panic as he tries to reach Barbara. The Doctor’s TARDIS soliloquy is a slight hindrance, as it makes Ian look slow to react, but the tension is recaptured as a dazed Chesterton insists that the Dido people are hostile. In the documentary Mounting the Rescue, the effect of Carole Ann Ford’s departure is examined. William Russell reiterates that he found Maureen O’Brien less otherworldly; personally I’ve always thought the opposite – in fact her features alone would have made her ideal for the Doctor’s granddaughter under other circumstances. As well as demonstrating the character’s distress, O’Brien gives Vicki a detachment that expresses the chasm of centuries between the girl and the teachers. She deftly portrays a range of emotions, notably extreme fear during the first mention of Koquillion. Among the regular contributors it’s a treat to see Ray Barrett. Speaking fondly about the production, Barrett explains that he decided to play Bennett as a normal human being to preserve the surprise, but watching him again, this seemed a modest description of his performance. In the opening, Bennett’s spikiness could reasonably be judged as stemming from his ‘injury’, though it’s apparent he’s hiding something. When Vicki excitedly announces the landing, Barrett’s delivery of “What’s its location?” hints more of intent than concern for the new arrivals. Also, Bennett is clearly dismayed that Barbara is alive and well, and this is a testament to Barrett’s insight into the character. At these times, he shows that Bennett’s complete lack of empathy makes it impossible for him to feign it. The Rescue is seen as the point where the First Doctor softens, possibly because he felt greater responsibility for Susan. William Hartnell’s comedic flair is evident – the Doctor’s post-sleep fussing is one example – but in terms of powerful emotion, he’s unrivalled. The reference to Susan, and the Doctor’s scenes with Vicki are touching and brilliantly played. The Info Text reveals that, as the Doctor defends

Barbara’s actions, Hartnell wandered away from the script, but given the proposed line, viewers may prefer to think he did this on purpose! In one of Doctor Who’s best showdowns, excellently directed, Bennett advances, with Hartnell maintaining the Doctor’s defiant air. As the villain recounts his crimes, Hartnell’s eyes dart around, and it’s startling when the Doctor attacks. This is what Maureen O’Brien refers to as a “terrifying quality” that no other Doctor could match, and I’d agree that no other Doctor has communicated the fear of the unknown so vividly. William Russell’s opinion that The Rescue was quite a lastminute affair is borne out by some awkward plot holes. Perhaps the weakest is the depiction of Dido’s natives, who rather bluntly avenge their dead and secure the planet. It’s implied that the knife wall and other subterranean relics represent an ancient era, and that the carnage has made the survivors regress, but this is hard to reconcile with the Doctor’s assertion that violence is “alien” to Dido. Even without this contradiction, in a period with some of the most inventive extraterrestrials, these figures would still be disappointing. The Rescue is one of my favourite stories, and as with The Aztecs and The Tomb of the Cybermen, I was thrilled to see it in such a pristine state, and with a very respectable set of extras. What I enjoy in this story, and in this phase of the show, are the strong feeling of innocence and the impression of a family unit. The Doctor is a warm, reliable presence, and it’s satisfying that Vicki can board the TARDIS (still very much a safe haven) and feel protected and amongst friends, with real optimism for the future, not solely for Vicki, but for the viewers as well. Reviewed by David Bruntnell

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FANFICTIONWNAK

DOCTOR WHO

THE END By Grant Foxon

In the timeless recesses of the multiverse a small unobtrusive blue box ran the time winds. A battered shell like its owner. Tired but still with boundless energy. Inside the time machine The Doctor stood passively at the controls. He was alone, this was when he was at his weakest. Fully aware of all his errors and mistakes. He had recently left the planet Earth for the final time. The human race had exiled the Doctor away for good. He brought to much death and destruction in his wake. He was too much of a target for malevolent alien life forms. So now he was running through time and space. Never stopping, trapped in his own world, his own prison. Now he was preparing for a final adventure. To send the Tardis into oblivion…. Slowly Thomas surveyed the devastation he had caused. Whilst he had only fired one round from the hand gun, the viscera and mess at the crossroads suggested it was far worse. He knew that by firing the gun and killing a few motorists he would have the desired effect of distracting what was following him. Instead nearly fifty people lay dead or dying. Even worse the creature that was now following him only stopped briefly to devour a corpse. The creature had no home or family. A creature as unearthly as this what abomination could have conceived it? It existed trapped in neither heaven nor hell, but a place known by it’s inhabitants as Earth. Here lying, greed and devastation would become its family. It waited in the shadows until it was free. Thomas Morgan freed it. In 1 week the creature had killed approximately 98,675 people. All that Thomas had loved were now slaughtered by the terrible creature. The creatures appetite knew no bounds. The

confusion at the crossroads was the act of a desperate man trying to save himself. The Doctor was a timelord a being of great intelligence and ability. A time sensitive from an ancient race. But he had visited Earth to often and left traces of himself. These remained after each time he left. A small time rift bled life into these traces. They created the monster without physical form that was now haunting Thomas Morgan. Despite this The Doctor knew he couldn’t return to the Earth for making the creature stronger. Therefore he was sending the Tardis into a black hole. Causing the end of himself and in doing so unleashing the full energies of the Tardis into the eye of harmony creating the time lords time travel ability. The Doctor discovered he did this long ago when he himself was in the matrix on Galifrey. He was the third person with Rassilon and Omega. Thomas now lay in a field. The sun beating down on his face as he lay so gently and effortlessly on the ground. Had he sowed the seeds of himself and also the entire human race. He knew the creature would never stop. Thomas looked one more time at the shinny pocket watch in his pocket. It had a massive significance which he could no longer remember? Instead he threw it in anger. What did it matter now? The whole planet was doomed? Thomas thought bitterly. Suddenly he could feel the creature nearby. “Why? Why are you doing this!” Thomas screamed with all the energy he had remaining. “Foolish creature. We are the same you and I”. With that the creature lunged into to the hidden mind of Thomas killing him. The body collapsed to the floor emaciated. With that there were no more timelords.

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DAM GIVES A WHO write and produce your own show is nothing short of fantastic. I hear you cry the word 'amateur' and think of us as some fanboy parading in funny clothes peddling twaddle into a bucket, well maybe once upon a time it was like that, but no more! Some of us are actually producing audios that compare to even those from the officially licensed... Where it all began, like any first production however, is always a bit shakey. I mean, when you get ello reader! You may or may not be over the fact that Big Finish’s own ‘Sirens of Time’ has familiar with Doctor Who fan output, Peter Davison, Colin Baker and Sylvester McCoy hang on! what am I saying?! You’re saying words never spoken before, you begin to see the reading a bloody fanzine – of course you are! audio as it really is; an overly elaborated plot with some And as you may know there is a lot more to fandom average sound design. But even they were pioneering than just fanzines and conventions, there are even unique, unheard adventures for the Doctor and that’s some of us that like to dress up in funny clothes and exactly what we’re doing. pretend to be the Doctor too! Err, well not just at Copy cats? No. Hardly! home or in the shower with a bubble bath sonic We were ‘Sirens of Time’ in the summer of 2001 screwdriver, we sometimes spend time making fan with our first audio ‘The Big F Up’. audios and fan films, unless I'm the only one that likes And you were right in assuming the title summed it wearing funny clothes in the shower? up perfectly. Nothing is ever perfect and nor was our Yes? Well then... first outing in the TARDIS; recording ourselves with a I'm David Nagel, founder of small multimedia cheap karaoke microphone, two fan boys (well one was company DAM Productions, whom since 2001 has a fan boy, the other was humouring his best friend) been producing an unofficial series of Doctor Who fan who wanted to get into media production and make audio plays and fan films featuring two homebrew something tangible, something that one could boast Doctors. about afterwards and sure enough, that time came, ‘Audio plays?’ I hear you cry, ‘don’t Big Finish do again and again with each new audio we penned and those? What’s the point!’. Yes, you’re right, Big Finish recorded. And that soon morphed into our own take do do audioplays with official TV Doctors but there on the classic TV show, starring David Nagel as the was once upon a time when there was both no Doctor Doctor with companion Mike, as played by Michael Who on our screens (until every year now) and there Maher. was no Big Finish (OK in 2001 Big Finish had been Inspired by the groups that had gone before, like the going for 3 years but that’s besides the point). Like Big now defunct Floorten Audios and the still hanging on, Finish, we endeavoured to create our own approach to Crossover Adventures, DAM Productions (then the Doctor Who universe by creating our own named DAM Audios) was well on the way... monsters, revisiting old monsters but meeting them To give you a potted history of our early audios, let with our own fan Doctors with brand new stories. me elaborate in a paragraph... or six. When we initially There is something magical about producing your own meet our first fan Doctor, he is given a mission by the script, your own vision of Doctor Who. The ability to Time Lords to play something called the ‘ratings game’

H

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DAM GIVES A WHO but no idea what this is the Doctor then given a device that will travel him from any time and dimension, through an opening and closing portal in the fabric of reality. What? No TARDIS?! Yes, that’s right. The TARDIS was removed early on to allow short fan films to be made, minus the time, space and money needed to build a full size police box or console interior. Instead, the appropriately named ‘sliders’ portal would be a simple visual effect to allow multiple and varied storylines at various locations. Unfortunately, given the complex ability at the time to organise a film shoot, the audio series continued without any supporting fan films. The series thus spawned six complete adventures, each in different times and places and posing various threats against the Doctor and his newly acquired companion, Mike. By 2004 and the audio “Check and Mate” our skills had improved immensely we had better, wittier writing with superior recording equipment and even enhanced sound design and knew exactly what we were doing. If there is one audio you should start listening from, its “Check and Mate” featuring the dreaded Sontarans (voiced by some superb guest stars). Around this time we were getting endless requests from a certain Matthew Chambers to make his first Doctor Who fan fiction “The Opening”, this needed improvements or even adaptions to fit within our already established continuity. But Mr Chambers was persistent and soon turned into not only our next fan Doctor but also a lifelong friend. To introduce this new Doctor a fan film was needed and

what better to film a “The Two Doctors” come “The Five Doctors”-esque involving Daleks, Longleat and Time Scoops! DAM’s first fan film “Chimera” was born and thus secured further adventures for both Time Lords. Matthew Chambers has his own continuing audios which can be downloaded from the website. At present, there is no planned regeneration, nor any indication which Doctor comes before the other – wait and see. Now that a permanent team was found, the show has gone nothing but go on to new heights and new stories. Not only has the David Nagel Doctor endured a further 11 audios (a clever combination of narrated audio book and full cast audios) with the Matthew Chambers Doctor to have a more fuller series of his own in the future. Both Doctors have a mixture of short trip adventures venturing into the surreal to the sublime. Each Doctor has also been popping up in more fan films too, including the multi-Doctor charity fan film “Pudsai” which has over 11 other Doctors from other popular fan serieses. There is more than enough to get you started over at the DAM Productions’ Doctor Who website and so much to love of these mad cap adventures with two fan Doctors, so why not download a story, get a brew and put your feet up. There is more coming, so watch this space... www.doctorwho.damproductions.org 15


FANWNAK 4 For those of you that sadly missed out on a copy of FANWNAK 4, I have taken the

controversial decision to reprint it here, only because I have run out of decent articles and

I’ve got three bloody empty pages left and this seems like a good excuse to have a laugh at Mr Ruxpin’s pathetic excuse for an isssue. Thank god my issue of FANWNAK is back up to

the quality you’ve all come to love and respect. Peace and love

Adric

THE STIL NOT TH L FINAL E ISSUE ISSUE

G FEATURIN

U KE WILL YO FCUK’S SA OH, FOR CK IT IN NOW PA

ISSUE 4

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FANWNAK

Fcuk the BBC

must inform the It is with regret that I ger willing to lon no am I BBC that payment of the support them through ar, I feel it is be dy ted a licence fee. As to expect me to pay unfair of the bulllies for watching t jus them every year, e it, there is f*ck all fac t’s Le . ho Doctor W dio stations that Ra else on their TV and ement to inform I feel meets my requir ever changing and educate me in the ffed bears. Just stu ced world of over pri strongly worded wait until they get my bastrad from the letter. I’d like to see the try and lock me van tor tec licence fee de a right cnut. up. He will look like

editorial ! hahaha n’t you? No such hahahahahad seen the last of me did pping

istmas wra Thought you escaped from my Chr luck I’m afraid. I’ve release a much needed new issue of n paper just in time to seething over being left with the trai left me with a FANWNAK . I am still e 3. That Scott Burditt wreck that was Issu and I feel that in order to sur vive the ng over all taki right load of bollox am I nonsense almost complete whole “FINAL ISSUE” ibilities. Despite the production respons (thank god for Andrew Orton and lack of contributionsI’m confident that we will shift more myself ) to this issue ody Panic Moon, who I’m sure are copies than that blo and are selling all their worldly goods probably broke nowt will teach them for trying to take us on eBay. Good. Tha muscling in on their market share down. Anyway, I’m rosoft I am going to cut off now and just like Mic their air supply. Teddy Ruxpin Editor

is nts that FANWNAK P.S. No more complai r please, I the worst Fanzine eveYou just am sick of hearing it.r me on. know that it will spuistmas. Oh, and Merry Chr me. There. I’ve said it. Sue

Teddy Ruxpin

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Contributions

Contributions

Some smart arse reviews of the latest TV, Audio and Books should be here but no-one can be bothered to write any for us. So you will have to go elsewhere for your diet of Who. Try the internet or something.

It would have been nice to have a review of Season 6 here. I’d do it myself but to be honest I couldn’t be bothered to watch it. Has Moffat left yet?

x o b r e t t e L

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18


Is Doctor Who Healthy?

my favourite series, I have benefitied from it. How? Low calories snack food? No. Starvation then? No. The treadmill and my trusty old iPod. Yes, that's right. Doctor Who keeps me fit. There, I've come out of the closet and said it. Without my iPod and portable Who I'd probably be several stone heavier. Anyone, who has used a treadmill will probably find it very boring after a few minutes without some kind of entertainment and Doctor Who fits the bill perfectly. You might argue that I could watch any ou series or maybe, god forbid listen to high energy dance music instead but despite trying, I always go back to Doctor might wonder what this article Who. Most of it is perfectly timed for workouts too. The is going to be about with a title like that. Although, old 24 minute-ish format is a good minimum goal to you'd probably guess it isn't going to be about the Doctor's fitness or an analysis of the Doctor's diet or achieve. A song might change my mood after a few minutes but with Doctor Who, a good clffhanger might it would be called, "Is The Doctor Healthy?". Besides, that would be a stupid question to muse. Wouldn't mean another episode and another 24 minutes of it? Bear with me then, as a half arsed article is cmoing up... punishing running. Trouble is, it really has to be Doctor Who. A comedy series A quick glance at new Doctor Who would reveal that he is can have me laughing too often and will slow my pace. indeed in very good shape but maybe a little skinny for some. To be fair, the Doctor is always running around, so Saying, that, a few classic series lines have slowed me down a bit. Especialy from Time and the Rani "I have the probably has never been healthier. I'm not saying his loyhargil", and "Leave the girl, it's the man I want" Mind you, choice of a diet of fish fingers and custard would be for there is something so very right about getting physical with everyone though but at some point you might have Kate O'Mara spurring me onward to exhaustion. considered trying it. Silly you! The classic era of Who plays greats on an iPod too. It's If you can be bothered looking at Classic Doctor Who, it might reveal a very different story, especially with the first relatively slow moving which suits my pace. It's also a good excuse to lose yourself in the moment for a bit. Doctor Doctor. Hartnell wasn't really up to being any kind of Action Man but he was seen to be enjoying a good walk in becomes a lot more of a personal experience. It feels selfish and made just for me. Oh, but which episodes to a few episodes at least. Although, his early preference for choose! This can waste a good 20 minutes at my computer tobacco was quickly stamped out. Anyway, I could go on but I digress. So, is this article about the very old fashioned undoing some of the hardwork on the treadmill... An Apple a day keeps the Doctor away, An Apple iPod a perceived negative social implications of watching an old day keeps the Doctor home. Just doesn't quite have the sci-fi series with the "not we" then? same ring to it though does it? Nope. Adric I am actually suggesting that instead of having a negative Peace and Love impact on my personal fitness through watching hours of

Y

19


Letterbox NOW THAT RUXPIN IS IN THE NICK, HOPEFULLY, WE WON’T BE SUBJECTED TO THE SAME UNCHECKED DODGY LETTERS THAT HAVE APPEARED IN PREVIOUS COPIES OF FANWNAK. ESPECIALLY ISSUE 4. (I Wouldn’t Count On It) Ed.

OK, I’m really friggin’ bored now. I’ve spent hours arranging my Books and DVD’s into story order and there is nothing left to do except Hoover my wnak stained carpet. Can anyone tell me what on earth am I going to watch now that Who is once again off the friggin’ air? I mean, how many times am I going to have to watch Love and Monsters to stem my Who cravings? Yes, Love and Monsters! A Blow job giving alien paving slab! Get in :) Mr P. Encilcase Frodsham

BARROWS! BARROWS! BARROWS

GOING UNDERGROUND? Oh, for God’s sake, the Doctor is going incognito is he? No he bloody isn’t. Just because he is known to die on 22nd April 2011 doesn’t mean that every villain will now feel safe does it? The Doctor has a frickin’ time machine and can appear anywhere in the universe before and after this stupid date, rendering this bum fluff information redundant. Besides, the Doctor will be seen to either regenerate or announce himself as The Doctor with a new face after his eleventh incarnation and this will be recorded by someone at some point. Undercover or not, he will be discovered by his favourite nemesis the Daleks or even the Cyber(Cybus)men eventually as Character Options will see to that. So feck off Moffat.. Mr I. Swallow Hull

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Has anyone here, seen my dog Fenton?... No? Oh, Jesus Christ! Mr F. Entonhasgoneawol Still running around the UK somewhere...

OBITUWNAK

Just Call our hotline today and grab yourself a bargain!

The BCB issues an apology upon hearing that a Doctor Who fan commits suicide.

09011 44576 00077123

Herman Vonbinkle (48) who had spent the last ten years painstakingly re-creating an animated version of Galaxy 4 Part 3, committed suicide upon hearing of the discovery of the real episode. Working alone in his bedroom whilst living off Baked Beans and listening to pirated copies of Big Finish Audios, he had set about the thankless task of re-animating the classic episode. A Neighbour has told FANWNAK that he has never heard of Mr Vonbinkle but will make up an interesting story for us for just £15. Anyway, Mr Vonbinkle has thrown himself into the Thames. A sad loss. Probably.

or visit my horny new webshite at www.jazzhand-wheelbarrowsjbapproved.wnak You will Openly proud get wheely carried away with my sponsors of Wheelbarrows! FANWNAK (not) Truthfully, John Barrowman does not really endorse this Bolox.

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FANWNAK Issue 5  

The latest issue of the Doctor Who Fanzine

FANWNAK Issue 5  

The latest issue of the Doctor Who Fanzine

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