Our Weekly Member’s Only Newsletter
Date Thai Ladies issue 12
A Dowry? In THIS Day and Age?
You’ve gotta be kidding, Right? see her on page 3
Our Member Aon
Contents Letter from Nathamon 5 A Dowry?In THIS Day and Age? - You’ve gotta be kidding, Right? 8 Thai Adventures 11 Dating Without The Dilemma 13 Thai Phrases 15 Our Favorite Places 17 More FAQs
Welcome to newsletter #12. If I were with you in person I would be offering you a friendly “Wai” right now. Do you remember what that is? That’s right. It’s the common Thai greeting made up of a bow with your palms pressed together as if in prayer. You’re doing well to remember your Thai customers, and this will go a long way to impressing our women. This week our featured article looks at the tradition of paying a “bride price” when marrying a Thai girl. We’ll explain what’s expected of you when it comes to the big proposal. We tell you everything you need to know about boating in Thailand so you can make the best of the local waters. And we’ll give some pointers to those trying to win the affections of some of our younger Thai beauties. As always we want to hear from you. Please write to us with any comments or suggestions you have for our newsletter so we can make sure we fill the newsletter with the content you want to see. Let’s waste no time and get straight to it! Here’s an overview of this issue… • • • • • • • •
Featured Article - A Dowry? In THIS Day And Age? - You’ve Gotta Be Kidding, Right? Spotlight On Featured Member – Meet Aon Thai Adventures – A Complete Guide To Boating In Thailand. Dating Without The Dilemma - 10 Ways To Win Over Younger Thai Women. Thai Phrases – Polish Up Your Thai With These Handy Phrases Our Favorite Places – Discover Where the Locals Wine & Dine FAQ – Got Questions? We’ve Got the Answer Now It’s Your Turn – Get in Touch With Us and Don’t Forget to Check Out What’s in Store in Newsletter #13
So grab yourself a cup of coffee or tea, sit back in a comfortable chair and let us guide you to a magical place – a country where the people smile a lot, where the food is to die for and where the right women are waiting to make your acquaintance.
see her on page
Let’s get to really know Thailand… Nathamon
Spotlight About Me My name is Pritaree. My nickname is Aon. My parents broke up so I was raised by my aunt who loves and cares about me the most. In my childhood, I learned and thought by myself. I was responsible for myself and was a nice kid. I might be naughty sometimes as a child. I worked to support my study expenses until I graduated with a bachelor degree from Ramkhamhaeng University. Now I am studying for the second bachelor degree at Chandrakasem Rajabhat University, majoring in Business Computer. I plan to pursue a Master degree. My dream is to own a small, lovely coffee shop and to have a warm family with someone who understands me, supports me and never leaves me when I have problems.
MyWork Now I am working as a Sales Executive for a company. I love my job because it is fun meeting a lot of people. My colleagues are nice and helpful.
What I Like On weekends, I usually read, watch tv, do gardening and hang out with friends. Sometimes we sing karaoke. I like going to the sea. I used to visit Jomtien beach and had a chance to work there. The beach is nice and the food is yummy. My story I used to have a 5 year relationship with a man. We lived together. He was very flirtatious. All the time we were together, I was often sad because of his other women. One day, I finally knew that I should not have tolerated such things any more because it killed my feelings. I decided to break up with him to give myself a chance to find the man who could take care of me and my family.
What I am Looking For I am looking for someone sincere and not flirtatious, who is a family man and is willing to have a warm family together. We will be there for each other when we grow old. We will have our small business to earn for the family. We will take care of each other, share our ups and downs, and walk through all the problems together. If I meet the ONE, I promise we will have a warm family, sharing our honesty and being together for the rest of our lives.
A Dowry?In THIS Day and Age? You’ve gotta be kidding, Right?
A Dowry?In THIS Day and Age? You’ve gotta be kidding, Right? The idea of a “dowry” or “bride price” isn’t a new one. But there’s a difference between them.
The Dowry A “dowry” is the traditional collection of money, goods, and property that a woman brings into a marriage. Historians think this custom, which dates back many thousands of years, might have served a few purposes. First, it was thought to protect the woman, because in many ancient cultures, women were often ill-treated, widowed, or abandoned. The collection of money, goods and property she brought into the marriage helped to provide for her and her children if anything happened to her husband. Many societies considered the dowry as an early payment of a woman’s inheritance from her own family, and the money and property
was only inheritable by her children, not any children her husband may have fathered with other women. If the couple died without having had any children, the property was returned to the wife’s family. Second, the dowry a bride brought to the marriage was a way to help the husband with “seed money” to help establish a household and provide for his family. Third, a dowry helped fulfill political ambitions and cement alliances. In medieval Europe, for example, it wasn’t uncommon for marriages to be arranged based on what property the woman could bring under the control of her husband’s family. Contrast this idea of a “dowry” with a “bride price” – the payment a man makes to a woman’s family in exchange for their permission to marry.
The Bride Price The “bride price”(XXXXX, pronounced[sĭnsòt]) you’ve no doubt heard of in Thailand is a payment that you will be expected to give to
your Thai lady’s parents when you announce your engagement. In very basic terms, you will be expected to pay for the financial loss of your bride’s labor and fertility within her family. Thais believe that the “bride price” is a way for a man to demonstrate to a woman’s family that he has the means and the willingness to support her – and possibly her family. It’s also a tangible way for the man to demonstrate his love, affection, and financial standing…as well as to demonstrate publicly the whole notion of “face” or honor that helps elevate the social standing of the bride’s family. This custom is also thousands of years old, practiced all over the world, and is cited in the Bible, the Koran, and the Torah. While some cultures have abandoned the custom, thinking of it as literally “selling” a woman, Thai families all maintain it to one degree or another. Traditionally, the bride price is paid to the woman’s family during the engagement ceremony. It consists of three elements: cash, Thai gold (96.5% pure), and more recently, a diamond ring (a tradition imported from the West). In modern times, the amount can range from nothing more than an engagement ring for the bride to many thousands of dollars (millions of Thai baht). Let me give you some examples about how the bride price is handled in modern Thailand.
Should You Pay? And if so, How Much? How much gold? How much cash? The answer is not an easy one. There are no etiquette guides for brides and grooms like there are in the West. In the U.S., for example, a traditional wedding guide will tell you that a good rule of thumb is to pay up to 3 months’ salary for the diamond ring. But in Thailand there is no such rule of thumb. If you are planning to marry a young, well-
educated, beautiful woman of high social standing, you can expect to pay a much higher bride price. If your Thai lady is older, has been previously married, has children from another man, or has a reputation for being a “loose” woman, the expected price will be lower. For example, a typical middle-class, universityeducated Thai woman can usually command a bride price of between 100,000 and 300,000 baht. The price might be higher for a woman of a prominent family – a million baht or more is not unheard of. But for an uneducated village girl, a divorcee, or a woman with a loose reputation, bride prices well below 100,000 baht are more appropriate. Take into account your fiancée’s status. Is she young? Well-educated? Has she been married before? Divorced? Widowed? Does she have children? Has she gone with many men before? All those factors come into play when determining the amount to pay.
You will want to offer enough to make a statement about her worth, your worth, and her family’s standing in the community, but you don’t want to be overly extravagant or worse – too cheap! And for sure, you don’t want to be taken advantage of or cause her or her family to “lose face.”
– and specifically mentioned gentle direct communication and compassion as critical to a lasting relationship. I bring that up here to remind you that the bride price may be a matter of honor for your bride-to-be, so you must remember to communicate clearly, directly, and gently about what your financial limits are.
Negotiating the Bride Price, or Sin Sot
Once you have made it clear to your Thai woman what your limits are, you will have to trust her to communicate your offer to her family and communicate with you what the “ritual” will be, so that everybody knows exactly what to expect.
In a traditional Thai-to-Thai engagement, the bride price is usually negotiated between the bride’s family and the groom’s family, with her grandmother or significant older female relative and the groom’s closest brother or best friend as the chief negotiators. That works well, as the families of bride and groom in all probability know each other, and may have even arranged the match. In your case, as a Westerner marrying a Thai, you may not be able to negotiate that way. If you are lucky enough to have a good, wellrespected male Thai friend who can negotiate on your behalf, you could choose to have him negotiate for you. But many Western men who marry Thai women have relied on their future bride to handle the negotiations with her family herself. In the last article, I shared with you some of the secrets of a successful, long-term relationship
As Thailand is becoming more modern and westernized, paying the bride price may be nothing more than a ritual performed at the engagement ceremony – you give your fiancée a diamond ring and give her family cash or gold publicly at the engagement ceremony, and her parents return the bride price to you as a wedding gift. Each family will behave differently, but if your Thai partner can explain to you what to expect, you won’t be taken by surprise. It may seem strange to you, this custom of “bride price,” but think about it…you are marrying into the Thai culture when you marry your Thai lady. It honors her, her family, and her culture to respect her traditions! Until next time…
Thai Adventure Articles A Complete Guide To Boating In Thailand The waters of Thailand offer visitors a wealth of options for exploration. Travelers can choose between a stunning cruise off the coast of the southern islands or traveling down the rivers of the north. The possibilities are limitless. There are boats available for every interest, from the fisherman to the kayaker to the yacht enthusiast. Here’s the guide to everything that you need to know to help plan your perfect boating experience on your trip. Koh Samui This island paradise has a wide variety of great boating options. Starting with the simple canoes and kayaks that are available for rent on the beach at Chaweng, located on the island’s eastern shore, these small boats are a great way to get out and enjoy the feel of the water. Those looking for a bit more power and speed can charter speedboats for the day from one of the many tour boat operators. Then for those that are looking to get out on the water and take it easy, the same tour companies offer a wide range of day trips for fishermen and snorkelers alike. Koh Pha Ngan Leaving Koh Samui, visitors to this smaller island to the north have the option of
traveling in style by boat taxi. These long boats pick up passengers as they travel around the island, taking people to and from their hard to reach destinations. This is the only way to reach the famed Bottle Beach on the north side of the island. For the scuba divers looking to get to know the fish better, there are daily trips out to the various marine nature reserves like Ang Thong National Park. The national park that is reachable only by boat is an hour’s ride from the island and well worth the trip. The charter takes the traveler on a ride of a lifetime as it maneuvers towards the collection of some forty-two small islands. There are also charter tours to the island of Koh Tao with its breathtaking coral. Phuket On the other side of Thailand’s mainland, there is the island of Phuket that offers up its own brand of boating. Those looking to take advantage of the winds around the island can go out on catamarans and other sailboats. Phuket is also home to one of the largest yacht clubs in Thailand. Tourists can go out on fun filled, day long chartered yacht trips around the waters of the island. Throughout the year, there are a number of regattas that draw in competitors from
around the world. Those wishing to learn the basics of sailing can take lessons here. As in Koh Samui, there are also the choices of charters for big game fishing in the Andaman Sea. The charter boats will also take guests out to the islands of Krabi and Koh Phi Phi to experience the world-renowned diving. Another must on the diving circuit is the Similian Islands that can be reached as a part of a charter boat tour. Phang Nga Bay is another must see sight with its incredible standalone rock formations. Coral Island, not surprisingly, is known for its reefs and is only 20 minutes away by boat. Bangkok One of Bangkokâ€™s best-known sites is its floating Damnoen Saduak market along the River Kwai. Tourists visiting the city can take motorboat taxis up and down the river to experience the sights and smells of this amazing market place. There is the choice between those that wish to just travel by taxi and the different tours offered by guides. Travelers can opt for the full day cultural tour or the half-day cruises. Chiang Mai Heading north to the province of Chiang Mai, travelers are still presented with a number of great boating choices. The rivers and tributaries of the north provide various tours as parts of treks
and jungle experiences. For the more adventurous trekker, there are bamboo raft rides down the rivers. The Mae Kok River is one of the more popular river rides. The Mae Kok, which originates in Burma to the north runs through the jungle and past many of the Hill tribe villages. This charter tour gives travelers the opportunity to experience the natural beauty around them and to meet the people of these isolated tribes. The boat tour also passes the Karen tribe where tourists can stop, buy handmade crafts from the tribesâ€™ people and watch an elephant show. Whether youâ€™re out for adventure or for relaxation, Thailand has a world of choices when it comes to boating. The wide selection of small and large watercrafts that transport you to and from the various sights and experiences are themselves an integral part of the Thailand adventure.
Dating Without The Dilemma 10 Romantic Ways to Win Over Younger Women: A Gentleman’s Guide
The reasons for older men wanting to date younger women are seemingly obvious, but why would a younger woman want to date an older man? The truth is that there are countless reasons that range from the security that he can provide to the comfort of being with someone who has more life experience. Unfortunately, these relationships are over before they start because older men don’t know how to court a younger woman. Follow this guide and have a new lease on your love life. Take Her to Dinner… And Pay Even the most liberated and progressive women want a man from the fairytales, who will coddle them and make them feel like a princess. Taking a younger woman to dinner isn’t only an opportunity to have
enough time to warm up and get into your comfort zone, but it also allows sharing, and allows you to discuss the food when the conversation about yourselves slows down. When the bill comes, be a gentleman and pay for it—show her that you’re stable in your finances and enjoy treating her to an enjoyable evening. Have a Picnic in the Park The fundamental rules of romance never change. Having a picnic in the park not only allows you two to enjoy nature together, to pick your own foods, to spend time together in a less pressurized and more public environment, but it allows you to have the freedom to take a walk afterwards and to continue your date if it’s going well. More than this, a picnic is simply a perfect
way to spend the afternoon so you don’t have to commit to evening plans if either of you find that you’re not compatible with each other. See A Movie This medium of entertainment is special because it doesn’t involve talking, but communicating in other ways. If it’s a sad movie, you can comfort her, if it’s a funny movie, you can laugh with her, and if it’s a boring movie, you can enjoy leaving together and having a drink at a nearby bar. Take a Walk Together Nothing is more romantic than a man who doesn’t have to hide behind dinner or a movie. This is the perfect way to see if you’re compatible and also to show her that you’re a good listener to what is happening in her life. Many older men fall victim to nature’s trap that being older means being more interesting. Women want to be heard, they want to be celebrated and they want you to help them feel this way. Sometimes it’s not all about you. It doesn’t have to be all about her, but encourage a conversation of sharing, sometimes listening to her, then her listening to you, and be man enough to embrace the silence and enjoy the fresh air of taking a walk together. Ask About Her Ask about her and genuinely be interested in the answer. Don’t wait to speak, wait to listen. Compliment her and encourage her to share more, understand what she is trying to talk to you about and respond to her. Cook Dinner TOGETHER Not only does this play into women’s natural instincts to find a man that will become part of her home, but also it’s wildly fun. You can go to the store together, pick out ingredients and talk about the menu you’re going to create for the night. It’s a project that you’re
creating together and that you can enjoy the benefits of equally and together as well. Give Her A Book Literature is an excellent way to explain you without having to do the explaining. This is more than sharing; this is sharing something that speaks to you in a deep emotional way, which will allow her to see a sensitive part of you and enjoy each other more. Stay Cool This is a simple rule that is too often disregarded. When she speaks to you, she may be speaking from a different general standpoint. Get on the internet and look up the things you don’t know about so you can participate in the conversations and have more engaging ones that you understand. Go Shopping Women have a hard time seeing an older man looking aged. Older is often sexy, but looking dated isn’t. This doesn’t mean buying tight jeans and getting your hair dyed, but looking classy will make her feel classy and that is true romance. Send Her Flowers Even women that are not sure if they are interested in you enjoy receiving flowers and other gifts. It shows class, confidence and style. The flowers you choose will represent you. Choose the flowers wisely and also take into consideration what you intend to make her feel, and you can always ask your florist for advice. This has never failed yet!
Thai Phrases Your bags are packed youâ€™re ready to go? Finally you have been able to plan your trip to Thailand. At last you will meet the lady of your longings in person. Still wonder what to say?
I will be in Thailand soon. Pom Ja Pai Pratheet Thai Reo Reo Nee
Do you know a good place to stay? Koon Chuay Nae Num Tee Puk Dee Dee Nooy Krub
I will stay for 4 weeks. Pom Ja Yoo Suk See Arthit
I am excited to meet you in person. Pom Tuen Ten Tee Ja Dai Jur Koon Jing Jing Suk Tee
I cannot wait anymore. Pom Raw Mai Dai Laaw
Our Favorite Places Dinner Cruise at Chao Phraya River One of the best aspects of living in Bangkok is always having something new and exciting to do, especially with that special someone youâ€™re interested in getting to know better. If youâ€™re looking for a date idea to break the monotony of the usual dinner-anda-movie then we recommend drifting along the magical Chao Phraya River on a dinner cruise with your lovely girl from Thaidatefinder.com. You may even catch the mesmerizing view of the sun dipping
into the horizon to start off a beautiful experience together. An evening on board a dinner cruise is a tried and true recipe for a romantic date. We guarantee that there is something to satisfy your every wish. Need something to talk about? Just look around you and point out to your date all the incredible sights on the river such as Temple of Dawn, the Temple of the Emerald Buddha, the Grand Palace and the
display of the royal barges. After feasting your eyes on the shimmering river attractions that are illuminated at night, you can look forward to a feast fit for a couple cruising down the “River of Kings”. In line with the Thai experience, dinner includes some of the country’s finest traditional cuisine and probably some of your favorite local dishes. Savor the distinct spices and flavors of a wide range of dishes from various parts of Thailand, and remember to share a bite of your dessert with your date! When you’ve finished chatting over
the scrumptious dinner, the two of you can get into the party mood as the music is turned up for all-night dancing. Alternatively, you can take your lady’s hand and lead her to the bow of the cruise ship for some privacy - it’s also the perfect spot to feel a gentle breeze from the Chao Phraya River.
A regular contributor to Date Thai Ladies, Yvonne live in Bangkok near the Chao Phraya River. When she's not writing, Yvonne loves to get relaxing facials and massages. An avid reader, her favorite author remains Roald Dahl.
If you have questions about dating and meeting one of our pre-screened Thai ladies, then chances are you will find the answers here. If not, please contact us and we will update this section to help other members in future newsletter issues.
no limit. We’ll arrange as many dates as you want to go on with ladies that want to meet you.
Do you take care of travel and lodging accommodations once I come to Thailand? Is it included in the cost? If not, do you work with a travel service that you recommend?
We have a “ladies first” policy. We will promote your profile and travel times, and she will pick you.
We work with some of the most reputable and affordable travel agents in Thailand. As our member we will be happy to advise suitable accommodation to suit any budget and ensure the bookings are made. We’ll also send our limo and driver to pick you up from the airport and take you to your hotel. How many ladies can I meet during the Thai Lady Dating Events?
If I opt for Thai Lady Dating Events™, can I look through all the profiles and then choose the ladies I want to meet?
You will then see the list of ladies that liked your profile and want to meet you -and see how things work out. Don’t worry -- you will be delighted by the number of sensational ladies that will want to meet you! You will probably think something along the lines of “this can’t be real”. But it is! Remember that Thai women see Western men as exotic, something they only see in the movies.
Plus, you can feel confident knowing the women you see in the profile are really We cater each trip to your specific who they say they are. How do we know? requests. Some clients choose to come Don’t forget – we meet every single one for a short visit (perhaps as part of a of these women personally, and conduct business trip). Others opt to stay in extensive background checks on them – Thailand for some time (as part of a longer with their permission. vacation). If we are wrong, and if you are scammed The number of ladies you can meet by any one of our introductions, we will is limited only by your personal time give you all your money back PLUS constraints and by how many ladies want the cost of your airfare. You will not find to meet you. The short answer is there is another service that offers this level of
commitment to their members. If you are also a member of Thai Lady Date Finderâ„˘, you can choose to meet from your online list of connections. You can also allow us to use our system to find ladies that fit your profile, who are highly likely to spark your interest (and you theirs)! You can use this knowledge to find what YOU seek in our Members section. To make the most of your newfound knowledge come and join us on the inside where you can meet a many pre-
screened Thai women who are waiting for a man like you to cherish and respect them, and to find true, long-lasting love and live happily ever after. Join us on our next Live Dating Tour Event. These women are highly intelligent. They know what they want and they are fun to be around. We should know because we interviewed and screened each one of them in person. Meet them now in person. Click here to register for a Live Dating Tour Event.
contactus Now It`s Your Turn ...
What’s in Store Next Week? Next week we put the spotlight onto another amazing Thai woman. Meet Noi. In our featured article next week we’ll help you to understand some of your Thai woman’s confusing behavior in “Understanding Your Thai Lady’s “Mysterious” Behavior – So You Can Be The Partner Of Her Dreams.”
Meet Me Now Bangkok Co, Ltd 33/7 Soi Pipat 2 Convent Road,Silom Bangkok Thailand 10500 Phone +66 2 667 0068 Fax +66 2 667 0069 Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
We’ll also give you the lowdown on the best places to trek in Thailand in “A Complete Guide To Trekking In Thailand.” And look at how to cope with a relationship with a woman who doesn’t speak English in “Tips For Dating A Non-English Speaker.” Newsletter #13 is going to be overflowing with some really important information, which will give you a huge advantage over other Western men looking for love in Thailand.
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As always we will feature a new set of handy Thai phrases to help you make new acquaintances and communicate better with our Thai women.
Meet Her Online: www.thailadydatefinder.com
Don’t put your happiness on hold a moment longer. We look forward to helping you find love.
Meet Her In Person: www.thailadydatingevents.com
Published on May 16, 2012
Full of tips and advice for meeting eligible and beautiful Thai women in Thailand. Also insides on travel and lifestyle within Thailand.