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Volu m e 3 7 , Is su e 2

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PRESIDENT PHIL HANLON engages a classroom in instruction

Image courtesy of Dartmouth College

Academic Rigor Mortis Joseph R. Torsella Executive Editor

“It is… a small college, and yet there are those who love it.” - Daniel Webster             There are few things as central to Dartmouth’s self-conception as its size. Students are proud to be able to walk from one end of campus to another, to be able to truly get to know their professors, to feel a sense of abiding familiarity with the nooks and crannies of their Alma Mater. And, as all of us students know, the College takes advantage of this unique status. Although its focus has seemed to shift in recent years, looking towards broader graduate programs and institutes, the core of Dartmouth’s pitch to prospective students is still its size – the small seminars, the tight knit

community, and the beautiful campus that feels like home. Dartmouth is a college, not a university, and both alumni and students seem to want to keep it that way. It is not surprising, then, that attempts at expanding have in recent years met with some opposition. Proposals in 2012 to expand the graduate program met with opposition from such distinguished alumni as Joseph Asch ’79, and in 2016 a petition protesting the expansion of the College reached 1800 signatures. Aside from the expansion of Dartmouth’s graduate programs, much of the agenda of current president Philip J. Hanlon ’77 has been focused on maintaining Dartmouth’s unique identity within the Ivy League. One notable example, a central tenet of the Moving Dartmouth Forward initiative,

has been the increased focus on academic rigor. In 1965, the median GPA at the college was a 2.66. Today, that has increased to a 3.46. Further grade inflation is rightly viewed by the administration as a threat to Dartmouth’s reputation as a serious academic institution. But, since 1999, a little-known academic policy at the College has threatened the core character of this institution – and undermined the well-intentioned policies set to maintain it. For 18 years, Dartmouth has forcibly cancelled classes with fewer than five students. It is the only Ivy League institution to do so. An investigation by The Dartmouth Review has revealed that this policy is deeply flawed, hurting professors, undermining students, and diminishing Dartmouth’s academic integrity.

A New and Unique Policy The source of this issue is a single policy – one that is tucked away in an unassuming corner of Dartmouth’s Catalog of Organization, Regulations, and Courses. In the “Instruction” section, under “Time Sequence,” the sentence is hidden in a paragraph governing course scheduling: “Dartmouth reserves the right to alter, including cancel, course offerings if enrollments (fewer than five students), resources and/or other circumstances in the judgment of the Trustees and Administration require.” It is unclear whether the trustees are ever consulted on specific courses as the clause suggests; The Review’s reporting suggests that the decision is confined, in large part, to the administration itself.


The Response to Trump Elliott A. Lancry Erik R. Jones

Associate Editor Contributor

Since the shocking outcome of the 2016 presidential election, the Dartmouth administration has made every effort to portray Donald Trump’s victory as an undisputed national tragedy. In the days following the elections, students were bombarded with campus-wide emails sent out not only by administrators, but also by a collection of outraged student groups. Although the administration addressed the campus in a more subtle and civil and less raw and vulgar manner than some of the student groups (though, admittedly, it is difficult to get less subtle and civil than “F**k Trump), there

was still a somber tone in the emails that did more than simply hint at favorability toward the losing candidate. They were quick to remind the student body of the counseling facilities that they have made available on campus, supposedly for the Clinton supporters who found themselves in need of therapy following their loss in the general election. One of the recurring elements in the post-election emails has been an emphasis on catering to the needs of the undocumented immigrants on campus, and specifically those who are relying on DACA (Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals) to remain in the United States.





Editor-in-Chief Jack F. Mourouzis offers his perspective on the dangers of ideology.

The Review takes a look at the College’s admissions strategy for the Class of 2021.

We examine the recent appointment of Neil Gorsuch to the United States Supreme Court.




2 Monday – April 24, 2017

The Dartmouth Review

The Dartmouth Review





For thirty-five years, The Dartmouth Review has been the College’s only independent newspaper and the only student opinion journal that matters. It is the oldest and most renowned campus commentary publication in the nation and spawned a national movement at the likes of Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, and countless others. Our staff members and alumni have won many awards, including the Pulitzer Prize, and have been published in the Boston Globe, New York Times, National Review, American Spectator, Wall Street Journal, Weekly Standard, Village Voice, New Criterion, and many others. The Review aims to provide a voice for any student who enjoys challenging brittle and orthodox thinking. We stand for free speech, student rights, and the liberating arts. Whatever your political leanings, we invite you to come steep yourself in campus culture and politics, Dartmouth lore, keen witticisms, and the fun that comes with writing for an audience of thousands. We’re looking for writers, photographers, cartoonists, aspiring business managers, graphic designers, web maestros, and anyone else who wants to learn from Dartmouth’s unofficial school of journalism.


EST. 1980



Liberty and Ideology

Jack F. Mourouzis

Editor-in-Chief Emeritus Sandor Farkas

Executive Editors Joshua L. Kauderer Joseph R. Torsella

Managing Editors Jack S. Hutensky Rushil Shukla Zachary P. Port

Associate Editors Shawn E. Honaryar Elliott A. Lancry B. Webb Harrington Brandon E. Teixeira

Senior Correspondents

Brian Chen & Marcus J. Thompson


– Inge-Lise Ameer, Vice Provost for Student Affairs

Robert Y. Sayegh

President Emeritus

Meetings held Mondays at 6:30 PM at our offices at 32 S. Main Street

Matthew R. Zubrow

(next to Lou’s in the lower level office space)

Vice Presidents Jason B. Ceto & Noah J. Sofio

INSIDE THE ISSUE Rigor Mortis: Class Size at Dartmouth

The Review examines with a critical eye the College’s practice of cancelling classes that enroll fewer than five students, taking a look at the potential problems that such a policy poses for the academic integrity of the College........................................................... PAGE 1

Dartmouth Admissions

The College’s declining admissions numbers have been cited often in recent times, but it appears that there is still a silver lining in the situation, as new practices might ultimately turn out beneficial for Dartmouth................................................................................. PAGE 8

The Administration’s Response to Trump

Justice Gorsuch: Tremendous!

The Week in Review

The Review Reviews: Salt Hill Pub

We take a look at President Hanlon and his administration’s response to recent policies instituted by President Trump........................................................................................ PAGE 1

Various writers document and reflect on the events of the past week, offering commentary and a valuable conservative perspective............................................................... PAGE 4

SUBSCRIBE The Dartmouth Review is produced bi-weekly by Dartmouth College undergraduates. It is published by the Hanover Review, Inc., a tax-deductible, non-profit organization. Please consider helping to support Dartmouth’s only independent newspaper, and perhaps the only voice of reason left here on campus. Yearly print subscriptions start at just $40, for which we will mail each issue directly to your door. Electronic subscriptions cost $25 per year, for which you receive a PDF of The Review in your inbox at press time. Contributions above $40 are tax-deductible and greatly appreciated. Please include your mailing address and make checks payable to:

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The Review takes a look at the credentials of the United States’ newest Supreme Court associate justice, Neil M. Gorsuch.................................................................................. PAGE 10

Our tried-and-true team of reviewers takes on the Hanover casual staple in the latest installment of our award-winning restaurant review series........................................ PAGE 11

“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win great triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to takerank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.” —Theodore Roosevelt


SAFE “Because every student deserves a safe space”





Monday – April 24, 2017


Greg Fossedal, Gordon Haff, Benjamin Hart, Keeney Jones

Legal Counsel

Mean-Spirited, Cruel, and Ugly

Board of Trustees

Martin Anderson, Patrick Buchanan, Theodore Cooperstein, Dinesh D’Souza, Michael Ellis, Robert Flanigan, John Fund, Kevin Robbins, Gordon Haff, Jeffrey Hart, Laura Ingraham, Mildred Fay Jefferson, William Lind, Steven Menashi, James Panero, Hugo Restall, Roland Reynolds, William Rusher, Weston Sager, Emily Esfahani-Smith, R. Emmett Tyrrell, Sidney Zion


NOTES Special thanks to William F. Buckley, Jr. “C’est ce pour quoi je me bats. En votre nom... Aux nom du peuple!” The Editors of The Dartmouth Review welcome correspondence from readers concerning any subject, but prefer to publish letters that comment directly on material published previously in The Review. We reserve the right to edit all letters for clarity and length. Please submit letters to the editor by mail or email: Or by mail at:

The Dartmouth Review P.O. Box 343 Hanover, NH 03755 (603) 643-4370

Please direct all complaints to:

In his 1882 manuscript God and the email under the banner of the Dartmouth State, Russian anarchist and philosopher Action Collective. Their message is not Mikhail Bakunin wrote that “The liber- one that many would take issue with; the ty of man consists solely in this: that he overall mission is stated to be fighting “to obeys natural laws because he has himself create a more just, inclusive Dartmouth, recognized them as such, and not because where all students… feel safe, supported, they have bene externally imposed upon fulfilled and get the most out of their acahim by any extrinsic will whatever, divine demics, extracurricular activities, and soor human, collective of individual.” While cial lives.” It is an honorable goal, and not his thoughts regarding the state and oth- one that is wholly unachievable. Unforer most important structures of mankind tunately, however, the Dartmouth Action do not hold true in today’s society, Collective’s rhetoric often does not I believe that Bakunin’s words line up with their actions or the are indeed applicable when actions of Dartmouth’s greater looked at in the context of liberal contingent. ideology – especially in toIt is evident in many day’s society. spheres of student life. First Historically, it is quite and foremost is the “shut up clear where ideologies have and listen” dynamic (often proved enormously influenmanifest in the equally-radtial, both for better and for ical “educate yourself ” worse. The ideology of the command) that is too American colonists — as often encountered when Thomas Jefferson put it, the left clashes with the pursuit of life, liberty, laypeople. This is damand happiness — led to aging because it wholly revolution, independence, rejects the exchange of Jack F. Mourouzis and the birth of the Unitideas, and reinforces the ed States. Typically, however, ideology has claim that the words of the left are law, manifested itself in more nefarious forms. utterly unchallengeable and categorically The ideology of the National Socialists in true. As we at The Review often discuss, Germany led to the Second World War however, this is never the case. and the horrors of the Holocaust. VladiIt was also evident in the Black Lives mir Lenin’s interpretation of Karl Marx’s Matter library protests, when protesters ideas of communism led to the ideology of stormed the library during finals period, Bolshevism, resulting in the Soviet Union, disrupting students’ studying during a the propagation of communism through- critical period of the term and antagonizout the world, and the ultimate collapse ing students who refused to participate. of “history’s greatest experiment.” In the It was evident in the misguided #Fightworld of today, the most dangerous ideol- 4FacultyofColor protests when Professor ogy is found in the form of radical Islamic Aimee Bahng was denied tenure, despite terrorism — an ideology that threatens to a questionable academic record. It was evtear at the very fabric of western civiliza- ident when students destroyed a bulletin tion. board celebrating National Police Week Ideologies, however, come in a range of and honoring law enforcement in a time sizes and scales, but these differences do when law enforcement officers are demonnot necessarily diminish their dangers. ized by such groups across the nation. It The ideology which is perhaps most in- was evident in the egregious reaction to fluential on the College (and higher edu- the election of President Donald Trump, cation in general) is what I refer to as the and the inability to accept a fair defeat in “ideology of social justice.” Unlike the a democratic election, and evident in the aforementioned historical ideologies, this attempted burning of an American flag on school of thought is disjoint, not unified the Green on Inauguration Day. by any dictating party or body. It propaWhat role, then, does The Dartmouth gates through social networks and liberal Review and the conservative student conmedia outlets, and stews within the walls tingent at the College play in this scenario? of university safe spaces — and, most im- Our task is fairly simple in nature, but not portantly, does not seek true social justice. so straightforward. In short, it is to counter It is an amorphous cloud of ideas rather this heavy-handed ideology that threatens than a coherent structure; perhaps it is due the free exchange of ideas and the securito this reason that this student contingent ty of students who dare to challenge their has never found a stable foothold on cam- beliefs. After all, ideology comes in many pus in the way that The Dartmouth Review forms, and the right can be just as guilty as has managed. The various groups that the left. Blind belief, however, ought to almake up this liberal contingent, for lack ways be sacrificed in favor of Truth. There of better name, are not even themselves is an eternal intertwinement between agreed on their tenets. liberty and ideology, complicated by the On the surface, the ideas preached by struggle to reconcile the two. Ultimately, these groups do not seem to hold much trust ought to be placed with the enlightdanger. The Dartmouth Radical, a CO- ened individual rather than the masses of SO-backed organization and “publication” groupthink. In all cases, the liberated exwith currently ambiguous status, recent- change of ideas ought to be upheld and ly released a manifesto in a campus-wide defended to the bitter end.

4 Monday – April 24, 2017

The Dartmouth Review

WEEK IN REVIEW GORDON MACDONALD APPOINTED AS N.H. ATTORNEY GENERAL On April 13, 2017, Gordon MacDonald was confirmed as the Attorney General of New Hampshire. Republican Governor Chris Sununu appointed fellow Republican MacDonald to replace Democrat Joseph Foster. After the nomination, the state Executive Council unanimously confirmed the nomination. MacDonald, who graduated from Dartmouth in 1983, has dedicated his life to public service and the law. During his time at Dartmouth, MacDonald majored in Government and was a member of Phi Delta Alpha. Prior to his confirmation as Attorney General, MacDonald worked at the law firm Nixon Peabody LLP in Manchester. As Attorney General, MacDonald pledges to combat New Hampshire’s opioid crisis and work closely with state authorities during his four-year term. As Attorney General of New Hampshire, Gordon MacDonald has joined a long list of prestigious Dartmouth alumni. His tireless work in the public sector is just one of many reasons why Dartmouth is proud of the new Attorney General. The exemplary work demonstrated by MacDonald throughout his career sets a fine example for current Dartmouth undergraduate students as they pursue their own paths into public service.

DARTMOUTH SAFETY & SECURITY: A NEW ERA The Dartmouth College Department of Safety and Security (S&S) is responsible for incident response, investigation and follow up of security matters at Dartmouth, according to the Dartmouth website. In addition to dealing with incidents, S&S is responsible for incident deterrence and prevention. It shares information and runs training programs in order to accomplish this goal. S&S’s overarching mission is to maintain the “academic excellence,

independent thought, and cultural collaboration” of Dartmouth. Incumbent S&S director Harry Kinne is set to retire in May 2017. He will turn his proverbial badge in on May 15th. He has worked at Dartmouth for 14 years, and he has worked in campus security for 37 years. Before coming to Dartmouth, Kinne was the director of safety at the State University of New York at Cobleskill. He was also a director of a criminal justice program at Nazareth College and later the director of facilities operation at Wesleyan University. Kinne came to Dartmouth seeking a more security-centric role in a community that he admired. Kinne is noteworthy for transforming S&S into an accredited, much more professional agency than it had been before his arrival at Dartmouth. Under his leadership, S&S became recognized by the International Association of Campus Law Enforcement Administrators. According to an article in The Dartmouth, recognition by this association is difficult to attain: 235 standards must be met and only 47 schools are currently accredited. A nationwide search is already underway for Kinne’s replacement. Hopefully, Kinne’s replacement will match his investment in and impact on Dartmouth’s community. In the meantime, Associate Director of S&S Keiselim Montas will serve as Interim Director of S&S.

PRESIDENT TRUMP AND WESTERN CIVILIZATION What separates the United States from lesser civilizations? It is not merely our technological advancements, our powerful economy, or even our military prowess. It is the dominance and superiority of our culture—Western culture—that distinguishes America. It is important to note that the growth of Western culture requires the appropriation and adoption of other cultures in the most respectful and admiring way possible. Western culture is so powerful because of its ability to absorb and blend aspects of other cultures. But without our culture, we are mere savages, a wandering herd of barbarians with iPhones, Centurion cards, and assault rifles. The decaying of our culture is a grave threat to even the most powerful nation in human history. Our culture is under attack. Sure, it has been for a while. Radicals from both within and all over the world have tried to undermine our culture. But, even those radicals who wish to our culture at

least want to replace it with something else. Now, as enticing as Sharia Law sounds, we should fight these indefensible threats to our culture, but we should also realize that there are other threats that may prove to be more effective in destroying Western Culture. The most prominent attack on our culture, the one which is most likely to do lasting and irreparable harm to our arts, is President Trump’s budget. Yes, it sounds absurd. How can defunding the National Endowment for the Arts (NEA) possibly be more damaging than the threat of Sharia Law? Well, quite frankly, because the dismantling of the NEA is being realized, while there are no congressmen proposing the adoption of Sharia Law just yet. The NEA being bled out is a reality, while a radical Islamic purging of our culture is merely a threat. We should be countering the threat of radical Islamic terrorism, but we must recognize that our own leader is undermining our culture and our arts—our only separation from barbarism—more than the enemies we are fighting abroad. President Trump is doing an excellent job containing and eliminating radical Islamic terrorism, but if President Trump truly cares about the maintenance and dominance of Western Culture, he will refund the National Endowment for the Arts. I love my iPhone, I love my Centurion card, and I love my assault rifle, but I also love the theater, the artwork, the music, and the culture of this great country.

STUDENT WRITES #BLACKLIVESMATTER 100 TIMES AND ACCEPTED BY STANFORD This spring, high school senior Ziad Ahmed was accepted into Stanford University. The student from Princeton, New Jersey answered the prompt of “what matters to you and why” by writing “#BlackLivesMatter” 100 times. Some may wonder why he did not choose to attend Princeton because he lives nearby. Unfortunately, the answer is out of reach as the prestigious Ivy League educational institution plausibly may have rejected him. Yet Ahmed’s admission into Stanford has raised a firestorm of controversy. Many people are hurt that this individual was admitted to a top school for writing a controversial phrase over and over. Ahmed stated: “I am many things, but I am an unapologetic progressive first and foremost.” Staying true to his belief in social justice, it is clear that Ahmed is dedicated to the cause.


Stinson’s: Your Pong HQ Cups, Balls, Paddles, Accessories

(603) 643-6086 |

The Dartmouth Review

Monday – April 24, 2017


Devon M. Kurtz Elliott Lancry Noah J. Sofio Rushil Shukla Shawn E. Honaryar William P. Bednarz

DARTMOUTH’S PLEDGE ON SUSTAINABILITY AND REDUCTION OF CARBON EMISSIONS On April 22, 2017, Dartmouth President Phil Hanlon ’77 sent a letter to the Dartmouth community announcing plans to move Dartmouth College towards a low-carbon future with strategic investments in energy, food, waste, land use, transportation, and water systems to reduce the negative environmental impact of campus operations. “Over the past few years we have made historic investments to elevate our academic strengths in the areas of energy and the environment,” President Hanlon said. “Faculty and students in departments across campus and at the Arthur L. Irving Institute for Energy and Society teach and produce research related to energy and sustainability. This work will not only have a deep impact in the world beyond Dartmouth—it will also inform the approach we take to minimize our own environmental impact, globally and here in the Upper Valley.” The plan of action that President Hanlon presented to the Dartmouth community was based upon the recommendations of the task force that Hanlon convened on Earth Day 2016 to develop sustainability goals for Dartmouth. President Hanlon’s letter noted that Dartmouth has made significant progress towards becoming a more sustainable campus over the past decade. It has increased recycling rates, reduced energy consumption, and improved the sustainability of its food system. However, much work remains to be done. Hanlon endorsed the task force’s recommendation to cut greenhouse gas emissions by fifty percent by 2025 and eighty percent by 2050. Dartmouth plans to achieve this goal in two ways. First of all, it will transition from No. 6 fuel oil to renewables by 2025. Second, it will work to improve the efficiency of Dartmouth’s energy distribution system by twenty percent. These changes to campus infrastructure will undoubtedly involve much effort, time, and expense; however, this writer hopes that Dartmouth will be successful in its goal of building a more sustainable future.

SAECULUM PRAESENS FUTURUMQUE MILONIS YIANNOPOULI (TRANSLATION: THE PRESENT AND FUTURE OF MILO YIANNAPOULOS) Ante Diem X Kalendas Martias Anno MMXVII, visum Milonis Yiannopouli defendendi amorem sexumque inter viros et pueros promulgatum est. Milo dixit multas comparationes amplas significantesque inter viros et pueros, qui homosexuales sunt, esse. Addidit has comparationes pueros iuvenes homosexualesque a desolatione suicidioque servare possunt, si voluntas est. Statim plurimi homines, viri et mulieres, democratae et republicani indiscrete, exarserunt. Postridie, Milo nuntium fecit. Dixit sexum inter viros et pueros foedum esse, et non confirmare. Dixit se Breitbarto deposivisse. Milo quoque pro dictis suis satisfecit! Homo qui numquam satisfacit, satisfecit! Sed Milo multos clientes suos alienavit. Homines pii credunt sexum inter viros et pureos vitium magnum esse. Cum hi homines visum Mili audirent, irasci sunt. Fons visi anonymus, sed dolosus erat. Communicatio liberalis visum longum tempus habebat, sed non promulgavit. Cur? Tempore Commodo, cum Milo laetissimus pros-

perissimusque esset, Aggredi volat. Communicatio liberalis liberos floccifecit;modo auctoritatem famamque milonis corrumpere volat. Sceleratum! Quid Miloni Accidet? Rationalabilier cursum suum non constabit. Non iam liber suus prodetur, non iam in CPAC loquetur, non iam pro Breitbarto scribet. Non licebit Miloni In pleris Universitatibus loqui. Peccatum maximum fecit et fortasse non convalescet. Liberales gaudeant igitur, et advocati orationis apertae lugeant. Translation: On January 20th, a video of Milo Yiannopoulos defending pedophilia was published. Milo said that many important and significant relationships are among men and boys who are gay. He added that these relationships can save young gay boys from desolation and suicide, if there is consent. Suddenly very many people, men and women, democrats and republicans alike, were enraged. On the next day, Milo made an announcement. He said that pedophilia is

gross, and he doesn’t support it. He said that he has resigned from Breitbart. Milo also apologized for his remarks! The man who never apologizes, apologized! But Milo alienated many of his followers. Religious people believe that pedophilia is a great sin. When these people heard Milo’s video, they grew angry. The source of the video was anonymous, but cunning. The liberal media had the video for a long time, but they didn’t publish it. Why? They wanted to attack in a convenient time, when Milo was the most successful and prosperous. The liberal media does not care about the children; they only want to destroy the influence and reputation of Milo. Atrocious! What will happen to Milo? His career is probably over. No longer will his book be published, no longer will he speak at CPAC, no longer will he write for Breitbart. Milo will not be allowed to speak in most universities. He made a grave mistake and he may not recover. Let the liberals therefore rejoice, and the let the advocates of free speech mourn.


“And that’s why Marine Le Pen is going to be President of France.”


“But I’m just too busy. I have three midterms on Thursday!” “Wait. I thought you were only taking two classes!”

6 Monday – April 24, 2017

The Dartmouth Review

A Threat to Academic Prosperity

Class Sizes at Dartmouth The policy itself seems to be a modern innovation for the College. According to The Dartmouth, the clause first appeared in the ORC of 1999. The origin of the policy is another mystery; there appears to have been little notice of it when it was introduced – none at all in publicly available contemporary news sources. Aside from a single article in The Dartmouth, the policy has consistently failed to attract the attention of the community. This deserves to change. The Dartmouth Review has determined that Dartmouth’s policy is wholly unique in the Ivy League. No other Ivy League institution forcibly cancels courses when they fall below five students. This should be cause for concern in itself – unless there are compelling reasons for doing so, Dartmouth should not flaunt the standards of academic practice established by her peers. There are no compelling reasons, and ultimately, the evidence speaks clearly against the policy. A Case Study in Dysfunction In investigating this issue, The Dartmouth Review had the opportunity to speak with Professor Michael Lurie of the Classics Department. A distinguished scholar in his own right, the story he has to tell about his experience with this policy is astonishing. The trouble began in Winter Term of this year. Professor Lurie was slated to teach two courses: a second term of an Elementary Greek sequence, and an advanced seminar in Euripides’ Bacchae. Both, coincidentally, had only three students enrolled. The course in Elementary Greek was easy to get approved – the students, after all, had been promised full instruction in Attic Greek. But the advanced seminar offered serious problems. Professor Lurie was teaching this course for the first time – although experienced in the subject matter. Teaching a new course requires a lot of preparation. Apart from developing a new syllabus and teaching program, putting together a new extensive course page on Canvas, and other course-building work, Professor Lurie wanted to organize webinars with leading international scholars in the field: “The students might not always realize it, but developing a modern, intellectually ambitious, and academically rigorous course is an intellectual, pedagogical, and logisti-

cal challenge in its own right, and it requires a lot of work and preparation. The way I run advanced seminars now is that, in addition to everything else, I also try to organize webinars with interesting international scholars who have done important work on the topic the course is concerned with. These webinars give the students a unique opportunity to engage in a fascinating intellectual dialogue with some leading scholars whose work they have read, and they have proved to be exceptionally popular with students. But these events have to be carefully planned: the scholars have to be invited months in advance in order to secure a date.” When he discovered early in November that there were three students enrolled in the course, Professor Lurie contacted the chair of the department. “I asked the chair of the department what was going to happen, because it seemed that there were just three students in the course. I asked whether it was going to run or not – and I told him that I would like to know soon because I need to invite these international scholars. I was told that it would not be decided whether my course was going to run until the beginning of the term, and that it was my duty as a faculty member to recruit enough students for the course to run.” Professor Lurie was further advised that he should not request advanced approval from the Dean – and that the need for preparation did not warrant such approval. As a result, he had to cancel the planned webinars, but continued putting together a course without knowing whether it was going to run. According to Professor

the course, he began the winter term unsure if any of his efforts would be fruitful. After the first week of classes, still without information as to the status of the course, he informed the chair of the department that

Lurie’s estimates, however, there were only six or seven students on campus who were even eligible for the course. And, of the students who theoretically could take an advanced Greek seminar, it is not reasonable to expect that every one will take such a course every term. So, having spent a great deal of time preparing extensively for

dent. This class was a defining part of my Dartmouth experience and has taught me more than any other class I have taken here.” Quayle’s comments echo the sentiments of many students who have taken low enrollment courses at Dartmouth. They provide so many unique benefits – increasing student ac-

countability, ensuring student engagement, and allowing for one-on-one instruction and help. So it is difficult to understand why these courses are in the crosshairs of Dartmouth’s administration. Quayle himself

“No other Ivy League institution forcibly cancels courses when they fall below five students. This should be cause for concern in itself – unless there are compelling reasons for doing so, Dartmouth should not flaunt the standards of academic practice established by her peers. There are no compelling reasons, and ultimately, the evidence speaks clearly against the policy.” he would continue to teach the course regardless of whether it was approved by the College. A week later, the course was finally approved. The course itself ended up being a phenomenal success. Zachary Quayle ’19, one of the three students to take the course, was effusive in his praise. “Greek 24 was a spectacular course for a variety of reasons, and that was partly because the enrollment in the class was so small. I had more of an opportunity than in any other course to take an active part in discussion and build a close relationship with Professor Lurie. Perhaps the biggest thing about a small class is that, with a three-person class, everyone is so invested in it. You can’t just show up; you need to be prepared to contribute. We had better discussions in that class than I’ve had in almost all of my classes at Dartmouth, and I learned so much because the nature of the class both forced me to be very prepared every day and gave Professor Lurie much more time he could devote to each individual stu-

“It seems deeply unfair to professors – especially professors in small departments – to hold their time hostage until a determination is made on the small courses they teach. Professors contribute so much to the College – in their research, writing, and teaching – that Dartmouth ought to afford them every measure of stability possible.”

was troubled by the ever-present possibility of cancellation during the first two weeks of the course. “The concern about whether the course would be canceled was very stressful for me. As a double major, I have to plan my courses carefully, so I would have been in a bad situation had the course not been allowed to run, because I would have been scrambling to find a class that was both interesting to me and within the relatively limited parameters of my major requirements.” Although this story ends well, there are many that don’t. The Dartmouth Review has been made aware of at least one course that was cancelled under the policy this term. But, even though many courses make it through the gauntlet, there is a lasting negative effect on Dartmouth’s academic standing. Exploiting Professors Perhaps the most facially concerning aspect of the policy’s impact is the way it affects the faculty. For temporary and visiting professors, the cancellation of a course under the policy means a reduction in compensation. If the professor is tenured or tenure-track, then they effectively “owe” Dartmouth another course. They might teach a course in the current term for which they have not prepared, they might be forced to overload their schedule for the next term, or they may be told that they are expected to teach five classes as opposed to four during the next academic year. Even on its own, this is troubling. It seems deeply unfair to professors – especially professors in small departments – to hold their time hostage until a determination is made on the small courses they teach. Professors contribute so much to the College – in their research,

Monday – April 24, 2017





The Dartmouth Review

writing, and teaching – that Dartmouth ought to afford them every measure of stability possible. This lack of stability is made even worse by the fact that Dartmouth has among the lowest faculty salaries in the Ivy League. Combined with this, the low course enrollments policy puts our faculty on a level of financial and academic insecurity that is unheard of at peer institutions. If it continues, we may have difficulty attracting top scholars to faculty positions. Reflecting on his experiences with the low enrollments policy, Professor Lurie fears that it can also have a negative effect on the quality of course instruction. Even when a course is not cancelled, he says, the process itself discourages professors from preparing for their own classes. “I can spend weeks preparing for the course. I can prepare a syllabus and handouts and spend hours putting together a Canvas site – in order to be able to teach a course the way it ought to be taught – without knowing whether it’s going to be cancelled and all of my preparation is for nothing. Or I could learn my lesson and reduce my preparation to an absolute minimum: no extensive Canvas pages on Canvas, no sophisticated teaching programs, no comprehensive handouts for each class, no webinars. If the course happens to run, I could just sit there with a text of Euripides and let students translate, or talk, for an hour, without trying to make an advanced Greek seminar an ambitious and sophisticated exploration of Greek literature and intellectual history. But, you see, this is not what I think an advanced seminar is supposed to be like at one of the best universities in the world. We have amazing students, and I think they deserve better.” How can we expect professors to heavily prepare for a course under threat of cancellation? As students, we rarely see the full extent of the work that goes into designing and running a course. Aside from the selection of course materials and the planning of its structure, instructors are expected to have read the material themselves to the point at which they are able to answer any and all questions on the material of the day. Dartmouth rightly prides itself on its undergraduate teaching – students regularly tout the knowledge, preparation, and accessibility of the instructors in every department. This teaching strength is one of

the most important assets of Dartmouth’s central mission of teaching. For seminar courses and small classes, this teaching skill and preparation is even more important. Small classes often mean more work – students are much more liable to ask questions, go to office hours, and delve deeply into the course material, especially in advanced seminars. So why do we make instructors prepare for these classes without assuring them that they will be allowed to teach their courses? When we tell a professor that their upcoming course may be cancelled against their will and against the wishes of their students, we tell them not to bother preparing and to be happy if the course runs at all. It is a testament to the scholarly attitude of those professors teaching such courses that few seem to have given in to this incentive. “Your Business Here is Learning” If the impact of the policy were confined to introducing additional uncertainty into the academic lives of Dartmouth professors, then the policy would be bad enough. Unfortunately, Dartmouth’s code on low course enrollments also hurts students directly by undermining the academic integrity of the College. The policy necessarily changes the relationship between professors and students for the worse. In a well-functioning institution, professors offer classes to students, students choose based on interest, and professors give students the grade they deserve. The low course enrollments policy destroys this relationship, even when it is not used to cancel a course. Any student who pursues a major in a small department at Dartmouth knows that such departments are on a constant hunt for new students. This is as it should be. Departments ought to be actively looking for new students and coming up with attractive course offerings – but this should be occurring only insofar as a Department should be constantly improving. According to Professor Lurie, the low enrollments clause introduces an unhealthy fight for students between professors. “It creates competition between faculty members who are trying to poach students for their courses. It puts the pressure on you to design courses that will attract enough students instead of focusing on providing proper service for students who want to take the course in the first place.” This Mr. Torsella is a sophomore at the College and an Executive Editor at The Dartmouth Review.

does not seem to be a problem for introductory and survey courses – those are meant to attract a large number of students. But it does undermine all seminar courses in small departments. The unique appeal of Dartmouth in general – and its small liberal arts departments in particular – consists in the small advanced semi-

to feel free to give the grades they think students deserve. But if departments and professors feel the heat when they have low course enrollments, then they might naturally turn to increasing medians and decreasing academic rigor. When professors feel obligated to give a student a high grade for any reason other than the quality of

nars that are on offer by leading scholars in their respective fields. It may be the case that only four students on campus are even eligible to take an upper level course in such departments. Why, then, do we force professors to harangue and persuade students to take their courses? This is not the sort of relationship that we should cultivate at an Ivy League institution – professors should not need to beg students to take their classes simply to satisfy an arbitrary enrollment number. What is the harm in letting three passionate students explore a complicated topic with an experienced and equally passionate professor? This competition, too, is a driver of grade inflation, says Professor Lurie. “You find yourself under increasing pressure to make your courses easier, because students who don’t do particularly well in one course are unlikely to take another course with the same professor. This can lead to grade inflation. If I don’t want to be blamed for low enrollments, or not be paid for low enrollments, then of course I have to make my courses interesting and captivating in order to attract more students – and this is a good thing. But I also have to make sure that the students want to take my courses again. So even if the student deserves a B, then I fear that I am supposed to think twice, because if I give the student a B or B plus then it’s very likely that the student will take courses with other professors and not me in the future.” The integrity of any academic institution is measured, in part, by the objectivity with which it measures the output of its students. At a time when Dartmouth continues to fall in national rankings of undergraduate institutions, such integrity is more important than ever. Professors need

that student’s work, then something is deeply wrong. If President Hanlon is as serious about increasing academic rigor as he seems to be, then he ought to end the low course enrollments policy for its impact on grades alone.

“The unique appeal of Dartmouth in general – and its small liberal arts departments in particular – consists in the small advanced seminars that are on offer by leading scholars in their respective fields. It may be the case that only four students on campus are even eligible to take an upper level course in such departments. Why, then, do we force professors to harangue and persuade students to take their courses?”

A Crisis in the Liberal Arts If some professors choose to combat low enrollments by increasing medians, then they are fighting a losing battle. A look at the status of the humanities at Dartmouth reveals a staggering crisis in numbers. According to the Dartmouth College Fact Book, in 2002, 23 percent of students with declared majors were majoring in a department in the humanities. Today, it is only 12 percent. The English department alone has fallen from 167 majors in 2002 to 52 majors today. That department used to be twice the size of the Com-

policy on humanities departments. For many of these departments, the past few years have seen more and more classes falling under the low enrollments clause for a single reason – fewer and fewer students are pursuing majors. It is deeply unfair to treat the traditional departments of a Liberal Arts education – Classics, English, and the like – as academic outcasts. And if more and more classes fall under scrutiny, some fear that their departments may lose vital resources. Professor Lurie expressed this concern, one that touches the very survival of our humanities departments, to The Dartmouth Review. “If we don’t increase the numbers of students who are interested in humanities courses – if we don’t convince the students who come to Dartmouth that they’re here to receive a Liberal Arts education, and that the very idea of Dartmouth is that you can major in English or Philosophy or Art History and then still get a job as a diplomat or lawyer or hedge fund manager, then the numbers will continue to drop. And there will be a moment when there will be several courses in a row in which there are low enrollments. There is a danger if the policy remains in place and the number of students doesn’t go up.” In 1999, the low course enrollments policy may not have been biased against the humanities. It may even have been well-intentioned. But the College cannot now continue a policy that increasingly puts pressure only on the Humanities, especially if it wants to continue to survive as a small liberal arts school. The Ability to Lead When asked for comment about the policy, Dartmouth

“Dartmouth is unique among the Ivy League in many ways. This is not one that we should be proud of.” puter Science department. It is now one third its size. Across the humanities, the story is the same. Philosophy and Religion have seen similar declines, with the latter department now at an astonishing one eighth its size in 2002. You need no special affinity with the Liberal Arts to see this as a problem. More and more students are using their time here as vocational training, eschewing a classical education in favor of studies in Economics, Government, and Computer Science. For proponents of traditional education, the decline in majors in the Liberal Arts is something to be mourned. But you do not even need to see this as a problem to be worried about the disparate impact of the low enrollments

cited financial efficiency. In an email, the communications office had this to say: “The purpose of the policy is not to discourage small classes – we value them at Dartmouth. We monitor the number of classes with five or fewer students to ensure the College’s scarce resources are used wisely. The deans have wide discretion and in many cases classes with five or fewer students are allowed to move forward as circumstances warrant.” As far as The Review has been able to find out, the College is right in one respect here – they do not cancel most classes that have fewer than five students. On the contrary, they appear to allow most to run. But much of the impact of the policy is not on the courses that are cancelled,

but on the courses that are under that possibility and on the professors who fear it. As for the scarcity of resources, The Review has been unable to determine the savings afforded by the cancellation of courses under this policy. But, considering the wide negative impacts of the policy, it seems incumbent on the administration to find another way to save money. When asked, Professor Lurie was skeptical of a justification on the basis of limited resources. “We don’t charge students who come here less than Harvard or Yale. So if we say we have limited resources and can’t provide the services that Harvard and Yale can, then we should charge less. What are the limited resources, exactly? 10 percent of Dartmouth’s budget goes to Faculty salaries. 10 percent. So what do we do with the rest of the money, and why are the resources so limited?” That 10 percent figure, confirmed by The Review, is astonishing. Over the same time that faculty and staff compensation for academic programs rose from 24-27 percent of the total budget, Dartmouth’s ranking in faculty compensation fell precipitously, according to the Committee of the Faculty. It is disheartening that Dartmouth continues to undercut its core academic mission while at the same time taking on more and more staff. Considering his experience here, Professor Lurie recalled the practice of top universities in Europe. “I have never seen anything like this before, neither in the UK nor in Germany or Switzerland. In Germany, there is a saying that three make the course (‘tres faciunt collegium’) – two students and a professor.” Such a reasonable doctrine would be a good change for Dartmouth. Even a system of enrollment requirements under which higher-level courses are exempt would be an improvement. Whatever the alternative, though, the current policy must end. Dartmouth is unique among the Ivy League in many ways. This is not one that we should be proud of. At its heart, Dartmouth is a liberal arts college. You can see it on the Green, in the classroom, in the library – ours is a small community that we love. It is, then, difficult to countenance the existence of the policy on low enrollment courses. At its core, it puts pressure on professors both financially and academically, undercutting their support at the same time as it suggests they reduce rigor. It is, quite simply, a bad policy – and wrongheaded, too. If we are to remain the prestigious College on the Hill, then it is time that the administration ended it.

8 Monday – April 24, 2017

The Dartmouth Review


Dartmouth’s Admissions Strategy

LEFT Lee Coffin, Vice Provost for Enrollment & Dean of Admissions and Financial Aid; RIGHT McNutt Hall, home to Dartmouth’s Admissions Office Images courtesy of Dartmouth College decade or so. The most extreme abled second-choice schools like of student diversity. Though that College must find some way to Devon M. Kurtz example of this move is Ameri- Wesleyan University, Bowdoin parallel does not necessarily counter. Despite the infectious Contributor can University. In 2009, Amer- College, and New York Univer- speak to the ethics of raising the nature of these treasonous ideIvy Day – for any unknow- ican University’s acceptance sity to effectively attract students early-decision acceptance rate, it als, the College—unfortunateing readers – is the name of the rate was 53.2%, a similar rate as who were rejected from their does not seem to be detracting ly—cannot use amputation as a day when all eight Ivy League the previous few years. A year dream school in early-decision from top tier institutions’ diver- treatment. As nice as it would institutions release their deci- later, the acceptance rate had or early-action rounds and to sity initiatives. be to expel those among us who sions, and it reminds me of a dropped nearly 10% to 43.5%. bind those students into attendLower acceptance rates are stand against the College’s traquote from Apocalypse Now, What caused this drop? At this ing when admitted, with a yield not the only benefit of more ear- ditions, Dartmouth is an instibut slightly adjusted: “I love the point, it seemed to be caused by close to 100%. Many lower tier ly-decision acceptances. Due to tution that has always respectsmell of [incinerated childhood a combination of factors, includ- schools have had high early-de- its binding agreement, early-de- ed and welcomed free-speech, dreams] in the morning…” ing increased number of appli- cision acceptance rates for years, cision admission attracts stu- so that is simply not an option. Every year, tens of thousands cations, increasing popularity but more recently not only have dents who know enough about But, what if we could decrease of the best and the brightest of AU’s early-decision II policy, those schools raised their early Dartmouth to declare that it is the presence of these traitors, high school teenagers finally and most importantly a higher acceptance rates ever higher, but their first choice. The result is a while simultaneously increasing have their chance, which for rate of admission for students upper tier schools have begun larger number of students who the number of students who see three years (or more if you have applying through both early-de- to do the same. Most recently, want to be here, and were at a more idealized view of Darthelicopter parents) they have cision routes. The acceptance this trend has even penetrated some point previously exposed mouth as the reality? Problem been preparing for, to apply to rate of AU stayed around 43% the Ivy League, with Penn, Cor- and are somewhat acquainted solved. This is not far-fetched their childhood dream college. from 2010 to 2014, and their ear- nell Brown, and Dartmouth all with the culture and traditions either, as the College is already Most of those dream colleges are ly-decision acceptance rates was increasing their early-decision of Dartmouth, and will likely doing it, knowingly or not. EarIvies, and most of those kids are around 70%. In 2015, however, acceptance rates over the past stay here for their entire under- ly-decision admission by nature crushed, rejected, and denied the regular decision admissions six years. With Harvard, Yale, graduate education. It is worth will have this effect. While it by those Ivies. However, be- rate dropped by almost another Princeton, and Stanford pushing noting that with fewer students may not be a massive, sweeping cause we are being so honest, we 10%, to 35%, and its early-de- the low acceptance rate competi- transferring out of Dartmouth, change, it is quite likely that as should look at the numbers and cision rate increased to 76%. tion to new lows, the other Ivies our transfer acceptance rate— our early-decision admission the facts to see how Dartmouth Finally, in 2016, AU admitted a have felt the pressure to keep already among the lowest in the rate increases, the respect and is stacking up to our peers and mere 25% of students, placing up, turning to the early-deci- nation—would become more love for the traditions and culour past. them in the most selective 1% of sion method to lower their ac- selective. But statistics aside, it ture that define our College will Good news, my fellow elitists, universities in the United States. ceptance rates at a faster pace is easy to see that having more also grow. our acceptance rate for the Class As one would expect, based on than their marketing campaigns students on campus who are It is rare that an institution of of 2021 was the lowest since the trend outlined thus far, AU’s could ever accomplish in the choosing Dartmouth because the caliber and prestige of Dart2013, at 10.4%. This number is early-decision acceptance rate short term. they have some semblance of mouth should take advice or slightly misleading, however, rose to a far less threatening While the early-decision strat- connection to it, rather than just adopt the strategies—especially as the College’s early decision 85%. egy does make sense to lower choosing it because it was the admissions strategies—of lesser acceptance rate was 27.8%. The With an ever-growing empha- acceptance rates, there are con- “best” option available or the colleges and universities; howCollege received 20,021 appli- sis on selectivity and rankings, sequences that arise from it. The most accommodating financial ever, the case of early-decision cations for the Class of 2021, a and a reinforced association of most often discussed issue with aid package, would be good for admission is one of those rarimore than 3% decrease in the academic prestige with low ac- early-decision is that it notori- the College. ties. While the Ivy League nornumber of applications from ceptance rates, it is obvious why ously favors students from prep With the traditions of the mally sets the trend, for once it for the Class of 2020, but it re- colleges and universities are schools, the Northeast, athleti- College constantly being sub- is the Ivy League that must folceived 1,999 early-decision ap- willing to pull out every trick cally competitive high schools, verted by radically dissident stu- low the trend. But, there is never plications, a nearly 4% increase and marketing strategy possible and wealthier backgrounds, as dents, this admissions strategy shame in making the right decicompared to the Class of 2020. to lower their acceptance rates. well as students with parents serves as a sort of self-preser- sion, even if other colleges and While our acceptance rate is de- Historically, the Ivies have relied who are alumni. Early-decision, vation. Students of the College universities have already been creasing overall, it is important on marketing and branding to and its “benefit” of a higher ac- ought to want to be here, and practicing this early-decision to note that we are following the successfully raise the number of ceptance rate, seems to favor increased early-decision admis- strategy for over a decade. The trend of many other institutions applicants and thus lower their the already privileged students, sion ensures that more students benefits of early-decision speak in accepting more students ear- acceptance rates to maintain while lower income students will arrive in Hanover with a for themselves: lower acceptance ly-decision. their domination of single-digit from adverse backgrounds and pre-existing connection to Dart- rates, more loyal students, highMany colleges have adopted acceptance rates. Other colleges, lower tier high schools battle mouth. The backlash against er four-year retention rate, lowthe practice of accepting more such as the University of Chica- it out in the fiercely competi- the old traditions of Dartmouth er transfer acceptance rate, and students in the early-decision go and Tulane University, have tive regular decision round of is not new, but it is has only perhaps the best defense of our round of admission in the last removed their application fee, admission. This point is valid, grown in size and absurdity in traditions. While Dartmouth hoping that without any finan- but it should be noted that an recent years. With resistance to Admissions is often criticized, Mr. Kurtz is a freshman at the cial cost to apply more students upward trend in early-decision these invading ideals waning, it deserves favorable recogniCollege and a contributor to The would submit applications. The acceptances has occurred simul- those of us remaining who still tion for its decision to adopt this Dartmouth Review. rise of “early-decision II” has en- taneously with an upward trend have a deep-rooted love for the strategy.

The Dartmouth Review

Monday – April 24, 2017



The Administration on Trump


> CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 Since the election, there has been a nationwide push for “sanctuary cities”, and now “sanctuary campuses” as well. Cities across the country have been declared sanctuary cities as a way to preemptively counteract any steps President Trump may take to deport illegal immigrants. This strategy has garnered significant amounts of controversy, as many people question the legality associated with cities’ refusal to comply with federal immigration law. College campus administrators have followed suit, making similar statements about how they will proceed if there is any radical transformation of U.S. policy on illegal immigration. In the Ivy League, university presidents of the University of Pennsylvania and Columbia have yielded to the relentless protests by declaring their schools sanctuaries. Princeton University’s President, on the other hand, directly rejected the premise of a sanctuary campus in the first place, stating that it has “no basis in law.” More common seen is the strategy utilized by Phil Hanlon, specifically regarding the way he responded to the requests from the Dartmouth community for his public endorsement of the label. Members of CoFIRED (Dartmouth Coalition for Immigration Reform, Equality and DREAMers) had launched a petition demanding Hanlon’s acceptance of the “sanctuary Mr. Lancry is a freshman at the College and an Associate Editor at The Dartmouth Review. Mr. Jones is a freshman at the College and a contributor to The Dartmouth Review.

campus” label, along with several other requests, including college funding for legal counsel on behalf of student beneficiaries of DACA or for any undocumented students. Hanlon’s response to the petition, which received some backlash from the Dartmouth immigrant community, did not directly address many of the petition’s demands. In the email sent to the entire campus on November 18th, President Hanlon stressed his support for DACA, and noted that he has joined about 600 other university presidents in signing the “Statement in Support of the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) Program and our Undocumented Immigrant Students,” which is currently hosted on the website for Pomona College in California. But as The Dartmouth reported, in an article from Debora Hyemin Han entitled “Hanlon responds to CoFIRED’s petition,” Hanlon did not directly address many of the components of the petition. Hanlon attempted to show empathy for the students by writing that “at this moment, some members of our community feel vulnerable and at risk,” but did not seem to support or oppose many of their demands. Since Trump’s stances on immigration policy were not entirely clear at this point, Hanlon made the effort to reassure immigrant students that may have been jarred by the election’s outcome. In addition, President Hanlon made sure to emphasize that the administration will stay “within the bounds of the law” in their efforts to minimize the impact of Trump’s potential policies on these students. In her article, Han accurately summa-

rizes Hanlon’s reaction to the complaints by saying that he “reaffirmed the school’s support for its undocumented students but has stopped short of adopting the title” of “sanctuary campus” for Dartmouth College. The College administration also responded to the temporary travel ban administered by President Trump. Public outrage ensued when Trump signed the executive order that would temporarily ban travel to the United States from a specific set of countries deemed high-risk for producing radical Islamic terrorists. On January 29th, President Hanlon sent a campus-wide email summarizing the executive order, and offering advice to any members of the Dartmouth community that may have been affected. The executive order itself originally outlined a 90-day suspension of entry into the United States for migrants from Iran, Iraq, Libya, Somalia, Sudan, Syria, and Yemen: all countries that had been dubbed “countries of concern” by the Obama administration. The national media was quick to label this action as an early sign of Islamophobia in the Trump administration, and the term “Muslim Ban” and, more commonly among younger populations, #MuslimBan, took off on social media. The term came from the fact that these seven countries have Muslim majorities, but of course the ban was not going to impact all Muslim-Americans that happened to have been traveling at this time. The email continued to state that Dartmouth was in agreement with the statement from the Association of American Universities, “calling for the repeal of the executive order.” Perhaps the primary intention behind the email was to advise anyone with connection to the Dartmouth community that is from one of the seven listed countries not to travel internationally. The email ended on a sentimental note, with an effort to unify the community, reading as follows: “Thanks to each and every one of you for pulling together as a community during this time of need.” On March 6th, following Donald Trump issued a second executive order calling for lighter provisions than the first executive order, which had been frozen by the federal court system. In the second executive order, signed March 6th, only six of the original seven countries were affected, with Iraq unaffected. Additionally, previously issued visas remained valid and the Trump administration placed a cap of 50,000 on the number of Syrian refugees granted asylum in the United States,

in contrast to the indefinite ban of refugees the first order called for. In response, Hanlon sent another email to campus two days after the order’s signing. Though again characterized by disdain at Trump’s order, Hanlon’s second email was much tamer than his first. He wrote that although the March 6th order “may cause less disruption than the first order” he still believes that the provisions are “incompatible with [Dartmouth’s] institutional values.” Furthermore, the second order drew outrage from student groups, immigrant advocacy agencies, and Democrats alike. The purpose of President Hanlon’s letter seemed cloudy. He proclaimed that Dartmouth joined 47 other campuses across America in writing a letter urging President Trump to “rectify the damage” caused by the first executive order. He also affirmed Dartmouth’s “commitment” to any member of our community, no matter his citizenship or country of origin. He additionally affirmed Dartmouth’s continued support for the Obamaera policy of Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals, which protects families consisting partially of undocumented immigrants. Hanlon talked about Dartmouth’s ideals and its commitments to its students, however he did not offer much in terms of solutions. Other than reassure students that Dartmouth’s infamously inefficient Office for Visa and Immigration Services would continue to do their job, Hanlon ultimately offered no solutions. If President Hanlon is indeed so serious about tackling President Trump’s agenda, which has been deemed so “inconsistent” with Dartmouth’s values that he has already written multiple emails on the subject, then why hasn’t he offered up any solutions? With their series of emails, President Hanlon and his administration have succeeded only in stirring up outrage and undermining the legitimacy of America’s political leadership. Though Trump’s executive orders are questionable in actual effectiveness, and not even agreeable among Republicans, the administration’s response has accomplished little, if anything at all. Rather than offer tangible assistance to affected students, it has simply bragged about its broad commitments and values and its incompetent OVIS. If the administration truly cared, they would tighten their bootstraps and offer up some serious solutions for those students they believe are in danger. The administration’s broad response and lack of action in

the wake of what they consider a crisis are part of an alarming trend at the College. Ever since President Hanlon announced Moving Dartmouth Forward in January of 2015, Dartmouth’s administration has received overwhelmingly negative feedback for questionable decisions and blunders. The housing system launched by the administration in November 2015 is still a burden to the campus at large, accomplishing little to actually build stable residential communities. Students are forced to live only with other students in their arbitrarily selected house, and according to The Dartmouth, construction costs of professors’ homes reach into the millions of dollars. This does not include the money spent on the social houses and many other costs necessary to institute the system. The social houses are not simply working, and remain practically vacant on most weekday and weekend nights. Indeed, the administration’s response to President Trump is just the latest in a series of quite unfortunate blunders. We at The Review remain hopeful that there will be positive change in the administration and their measures taken to affect student life at the College. Their response to the election and early policy of the Trump Administration, however, unfortunately fit within the continued trend of incompetence and lack of concrete action. Rather than emails founded by generality about commitments or values here at Dartmouth, President Hanlon’s administration could talk about real measures that would actually impact the lives of the students it feels are being targeted.


10 Monday – April 24, 2017

The Dartmouth Review

The Dartmouth Review



God, Gorsuch, and the Supreme Court

NEIL M. GORSUCH The newest addition to the United States Supreme Court - does not actually read The Review ly, he recalled his father’s love. that his family raises at their that the harder you slapped the B. Webb Harrington Associate Editor Gorsuch has a distinguished home in Boulder County, Col- line on the water, that someset of credentials, including a orado. how the more the fish would On Friday, April 7, the Unit- B.A. from Columbia UniverPerhaps some of the most love it.” Finally, Gorsuch fined States Senate voted to con- sity (Phi Beta Kappa), a J.D. important parts of what Justice ished his remarks on what he firm Judge Neil Gorsuch as from Harvard Law School Gorsuch stated in his remarks had learned from members the 113 th Justice of the Unit- (Cum Laude), and a P.H.D. were the lessons that he had of the Supreme Court by refed States Supreme Court. A from Oxford University, where learned from the two mem- erencing Justice Jackson, who few days later, the smiling sil- he was an esteemed Marshall bers of the Supreme Court that was a prominent Democrat ver-haired justice was sworn Scholar. However, he men- he clerked for: Justices Byron before joining the Supreme in. tioned none of these degrees White and Anthony Kennedy. Court, and was famous both In understanding Justice in his hearings, humbly prefer- While Gorsuch almost seemed for his dissent in Korematsu Gorsuch there are two import- ring to share the lessons that more impressed by White’s v. United States, where he opant aspects to consider. First, he learned from people out in In this case, Gorsuch and the majoria growing amount of infor- the world to those taught in mation on Justice Gorsuch’s any classroom. Rather than ty of the 10 th Circuit decided that the character has come out, both seeking to impress the Senate Obamacare requirement that health inthrough his long career, as well Committee with stories of his as during the long process of accomplishments or constant surance must apply to all forms of birth confirmation hearings that he reminders of his numerous control, could not apply to private comunderwent before the Senate achievements, he declared that panies with strongly held religious bevote. Second, we must keep the senators should examine in mind his impressive histo- his record as a judge and a liefs against birth control. This decision ry of legal analysis, both as a lawyer to determine if he was judge and a lawyer. The Amer- fit to serve on the Supreme was later upheld by the Supreme Court. ican Bar Association said that Court. One statistic that he achievements in the NFL than posed President Roosevelt’s Gorsuch was “well-qualified” did emphasize was his record his own Rhodes Scholarship, executive order that interned to serve as a supreme court of agreement with other judg- Gorsuch quickly became se- Japanese-Americans, and for justice, which is their highest es and how often this happens rious, stating: “He followed his role as a prosecutor in the rating. In order to best under- for any judge. He emphasized the law, wherever it took him, Nuremburg trials after the stand Gorsuch, and how he that judges try to understand without fear or favor to any- Second World War. Gorsuch adds to the court, we will go and pass judgments based on one!” He quickly proceed- referenced Justice Jackson by through some of his most im- the law and the facts of the ed to declare what he found remarking that, “He wrote so portant cases. case. While on the 10 th Circuit most admirable about Justice clearly that everyone could In his opening statement to Court, Gorsuch made 97% of Kennedy. “He showed me that understand his decisions. He the Senate Judiciary Commit- his rulings as part of a unan- judges can disagree, without never hid behind legal jargon.” tee, Gorsuch spoke in a deeply imous panel, and more than being disagreeable; that every- While Justice Gorsuch went passionate manner about some 99% of his rulings as part of one who comes to court de- on to extol the importance of the defining experiences, the majority. Seldom did the serves respect; that a case isn’t of an independent judiciary memories, and stories of his judges of the court come to just a number or a name, but a and several other meaningful life. Several times, he seemed different understandings. life’s story, and a human being values, these stories illustrate like he was brought close to Statistics and legal judg- with equal dignity to my own.” what Justice Gorsuch thinks is tears, whether from thoughts ments did not dominate GorFinally, Gorsuch spoke most important. about recently lost relatives, such’s entire remarks, and about two more of his heroes Gorsuch spent many years or from recalling his happiest were only a small part of how from the Supreme Court, and on the bench prior to joining memories with his two daugh- he introduced himself to the what their examples taught the Supreme Court, and three ters. He spent a great deal of committee and to the Ameri- him. First, the seat filled by of his cases are worth discusstime evoking the lessons that can people. Pausing part way Gorsuch on the Supreme ing. First and perhaps most he had learned from his par- through the remarks to hug Court was once occupied by famous was the case of Hobby ents and grandparents. His his wife, it quickly became the memorable Justice Antho- Lobby v. Sebelius. In this case, mother served in several im- obvious that the Gorsuch val- ny Scalia. Gorsuch said of Sca- Gorsuch and the majority of portant roles, including as ues the concept of love. A true lia that, “He reminded us that the 10 th Circuit decided that head of the EPA, and Gorsuch Colorado native, with deep words matter; that the judge’s the Obamacare requirement recalled her courage. Similar- family roots in the state, Gor- job is to follow the words that that health insurance must apsuch also gave details of his are in the law, not replace them ply to all forms of birth conpersonal life, from his love of with those that aren’t…[Scal- trol, could not apply to private Mr. Harrington is a freshman fly-fishing to tales about the ia] fished with the enthusiasm companies with strongly held at the College and an Associate Editor at The Dartmouth Review. garden, goat, and chickens of a New Yorker: he thought religious beliefs against birth

control. This decision was later upheld by the Supreme Court. A second case worth noting is Gutierrez-Brizuela v. Lynch. Gorsuch and the other members of the 10 th Circuit decided unanimously that a case involving an illegal immigrant, previously decided under an ambiguous statute by the Board of Immigration Appeals, ought to be granted a review by the judiciary. This ruling is important for two reasons. First, it demonstrates that Justice Gorsuch thinks about the importance of separation of powers. It provides further evidence that Gorsuch will be his own man, not simply a voice for President Trump on the court, as a minority of Democrats have unfairly surmised. Second, the case demonstrates Gorsuch’s willingness to challenge precedent. Gorsuch’s third notable case is less dramatic, and relates to the civil liberties of ex-felons. This case – United States v. Carloss – nevertheless stands out as important to understanding Gorsuch’s legal views. In this case, federal agents from the ATF followed up on a tip that an ex-felon, Ralph Carloss, had illegal firearms. The agents entered into the unfenced yard of Carloss, despite several “No Trespassing” signs put up in the yard. The lower court decided that the agents had implied consent based on the common customs of the land. Gorsuch disagreed with the lower court’s ruling; in his opinion, the government had taken away Carloss’s rights by acting against the Fourth Amendment’s guarantees against illegal search and seizure, and that the agents only should have entered Carloss’s yard in an emergency, or with a warrant. In his career as a judge, Justice Gorsuch decided over 3,000 cases. The three cases outlined above may not representative of all of those cases, but they represent Justice Gorsuch’s fierce defense of the law over personal notions of justice or politics. Now that Gorsuch has joined the Supreme Court, we hope that the court will benefit from his deep humility, cheerful humor, and his deep dedication to following the law, wherever it takes him.

Monday – April 24, 2017 11

The Review Reviews: Salt Hill Pub

THE POUTINE TOWER Truly a life-changing experience

Gil Hanlon Alfric Macallan


After a long hiatus due to their impressively busy schedules, Gil Hanlon and Alfric Macallan reunited in the streets of Hanover and made their way towards a local watering hole famed by students, locals, and faculty alike. Passing by establishments such as Molly’s, Murphy’s, and the esteemed Canoe Club, Gil became worried that he may never find food and that Alfric was leading him into a morsel-void abyss. However, a left turn and a short stroll had them standing in front of the Salt Hill Pub, Hanover’s very own slice of Ireland. Gil was delighted to get off campus after a prolonged stay with his younger brother Phil, the fearless captain at the helm of the College. The 30-proof capstone had taken a toll on Gil, an indiscriminate connoisseur of spirits and liqueurs from far and wide. Alfric, on the other hand, experienced a sinking feeling in his stomach. A fervent Scotsman, he had several issues stepping foot inside an institution that stood for everything he loathed. He spat on the ground in front of the entrance to let his disgust be made public. Eying a group near the front of the restaurant relishing in a free buffet, tensions began to brew that not even the sweet sounds of the fiddle could soothe. The waitress wandered Messrs. Hanlon and Macallan are longtime friends of The Review and staunch supporters of both Brexit and Scottish Independence.

over and asked if the group were ready for food and drink. “We need beer!” they demanded in unison. “Of course you do, here are some that I personally like... let me bring you some tasters!” She understood their plight. The eldest Hanlon specified that his preference was an India Pale Ale. “How original!” Alfric replied as he had become bitter of such hops. The waitress recommended two IPAs, one dark, and one lighter. “Give me whatever is hoppiest,” replied Gil, ever eager to showcase his sophisticated palate to any and all in the vicinity. Soon after, the waitress returned with the ominous sounding Double Black IPA. “Be careful, it’s 8.5% alcohol,” she warned. “Ha, I remember my first beer,” replied Gil, with a heavy dose of machismo. The beer turned out to be dark and hoppy, as expected, but otherwise exceptionally smooth. Gil likened it to a hoppier, more alcoholic Guinness (Gil wanted us at The Dartmouth Review to remind our readers that Guinness should never be drank in the United States, being only appropriate to consume on tap in the United Kingdom and Ireland, where the brew is significantly different - and better than its American counterpart). The waitress chose two different amber ales for Alfric: Great Northern Brewing’s Driftboat Amber Ale and Smithwick’s Irish Ale, but, for her own safety, did not announce either beer, thinking it best to let the men decide

in an unbiased manner. Upon tasting the irish ale, Alfric spat it out abruptly. “This tastes like bloody leprechaun piss!” Despite its darker color, the beer tasted remarkably like the fermented water rumored to flow through the basements of campus. Washing it down with the Driftboat Amber, Alfric was pleasantly surprised. The beer was heavier with a distinct amber color and hearty bread after taste. Alfric found himself staring into the glass, the amber hue reminding him of a lover long lost. As to avoid one of their infamous libation sessions, the fast friends decided it necessary to order food, a round of hearty appetizers to soak up the beer. First out of the kitchen was Salt Hill’s famed pulled pork nachos. Despite the pub’s Irish heritage, the chips were shades of red, yellow (read: white), and blue. The pulled pork pork was sweet and tender, qualities of a properly slow cooked pig. Balancing out the sweet pork was the savory cheese and salty chips, along with spicy jalapenos and a ornemental dollop of whip cream crowning the pile. Hands collided as the three reached into the mass of chips, taking special care to pick chips with a balanced proportion of ingredients. What self respecting pub-goer wants a chip with just cheese or jalapenos and no pulled pork? The pile was quickly reduced to rubble as the group prepared for their next appetizer. Merriment was had and another round of drinks was requested. Alfric and Gil’s attention turned towards one of the many flat screen televisions lining the walls of the establishment. Displayed was a rerun of an European football (read: soccer) match which prompted the duo to rehash their past misadventures. For the year of 1983, President Phil Hanlon’s rambunctious older brother Gil took his talents to a study abroad at King’s College in London. In what will be no surprise to those who know the man well, Gil quickly gained a reputation throughout his dormitory as the uncouth, barbaric, and impolite American. Alfric, however, quickly saw Gil for what he was, a phenomenal drinker, unstoppable womanizer, and most importantly, a legendary pub warrior. The two became the best of friends instantaneously, starting trouble on the streets of the west end, gambling in Soho’s sleazy casinos, and occasionally partaking in a class-fueled skirmish at one of central London’s signature student watering holes. Despite their supreme compatibility, Alfric, a die hard fan of Glasgow’s famed Celtic football

club, at first had a difficult time convincing Gil to share his love for European football. “These p***ies never even score,” Gil would say. “Where’s the contact, where are the MEN on this field? Any sport where someone 5’6” can be a world class player sure ain’t no sport to me.” “‘Did you just say ‘p***y?’” replied Alfric, highly offended and triggered. Eventually, Alfric realized that the answer to sharing with Gil his love of football had been in front of him all along. One Saturday afternoon, Alfric took Gil to Islington, then one of the most unseemly and dangerous neighborhoods in inner London, to watch a match between Arsenal and Watford at “The Round House,” a famed football pub. Gill couldn’t derive much excitement from the game itself, but he enjoyed the dark beer and the surrounding debauchery of the Arsenal “hooligans,” as they were called. To the delight of the pub’s patrons, Arsenal ultimately pulled ahead 3-1 late in the second half, the lead becoming more insurmountable by the minute. Gil was getting bored, but Alfric knew that he had to keep his beloved American within the premises for just a few more minutes. “You can’t leave yet mate, you still haven’t seen the reason we’ve come.” It was just then that nearly two dozen Watford supporters rushed into the pub, screaming obscenities that even the foulmouthed Gil had not heard. Alfric turned to his American counterpart: “You feeling like an Arsenal fan today? Or more of a Watford bloke?” Gil smiled. “Looks like our Watford boys are outnumbered mate, they could use some AMERICAN STEEL on their side!” The details following this very moment are hazy, but at at least one moment Gil stood up on one of the bars’ tables, proclaiming “I love this sport!” while holding an unfortunate Arsenal supporter by the collar of his shirt. The details from the rest of Gil’s time in London are hazy as well, but this wasn’t his last rodeo within London’s thriving “hooligan” scene. The waitress, oblivious to memories the duo were reliving, interrupted them with an order of twelve juicy bone-in wings Gil must have ordered by mistake. For some reason or another, the wings were split with regards to flavor, featuring honey sriracha and a house dry rub. The wings were excellently prepared as the crispy outer layer gave way to the tender chicken hiding beneath. Honey brought out sweet aftertones to mellow the heat of

the sriracha culminating in an extremely satisfying wing. The dry rub presented an interesting new take on a classic. Without sauce, the crunch of the fried skin could shine, yet the rub lingered with assorted spices giving it the hot quality one looks for in wings. There was very little conversation during this part of the meal as the duo went from wing to wing, amassing a pile of bones that would make even a curator of the Parisian catacombs jealous. Just as the two thought they could eat no more, Gil caught a looming object in his peripheries. Could it be? An appetizer they forgot they even ordered? The waitress, struggling even to carry the constructed tower of food, placed the plate on the table. The impact of ceramic and wood sent tremors through the table and up the diners arms as they stared in awe at the spire before them. “This is our take on the French-Canadian classic poutine,” explained the waitress as Alfric, quick to the draw, stabbed his fork into the pillar of french fries held together with melted cheese and bacon. Unfortunately, or more fortunately yet unexpected, the fries fell from the fork before they could reach the scotsman’s mouth. However, the fries were actually enhanced by the fall as they plummeted into the moat of gravy and cheese curd that surrounded the tower. The dish was as filling as anyone could expect. Excellent for soaking in the alcohol that the old friends had already imbibed, but detrimental to their arteries, tried and burdened by a life of debauchery. As they stopped to discuss their last dish, the two realized they were less than impressed. “Remember the poutine we enjoyed on our trip to Montreal?” Alfric reminisced. “Why of course! I do recall the chef came out and called us boorish individuals with no manners before serving us.” The spite of the angry New York chef trapped in Canada did not phase the two, however, as his poutine had set a benchmark that, unfortunately, Salt Hill could not quite reach. The old friends ended the meal in the same fashion that they prefer to start their journey into the cold, clear, New Hampshire night. Short glasses were brought to the table and filled with a healthy pour of Talisker 10-year Scotch. Alfric took to the spirit as would a baby boy to his mother’s teat. With the glasses empty and the plates cleared, the two stumbled out of the pub and into the darkness, ready to take on whatever Hanover could throw their way.

12 Monday– April 24, 2017

The Dartmouth Review



“The President is aware of what is going on. That is not to say that something is going on.” –Ron Ziegler, Nixon’s press secretary

“Listen, smile, agree, then do whatever the f**k you were going to do anyway.” -Robert Downey Jr.

“Classless society is the dream of people with no class.” -Robert Zend

“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I’ve never tried before.” -Mae West

“I must get out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini.” -Alexander Woollcott “They shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.” -Walter Winchell “If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” -Earl Wilson “The intensity of dark circles unde a student’s eyes is inversely proportional to the time remaining in the term.” -Wilson’s Law “France is a country where the money falls apart in your hands and you can’t tear the toilet paper.” -Unknown “When I was young, I thought that money was the most important thing in life. Now that I am old, I know it is.” -Oscar Wilde “We’ll blast them back into the stone ages!” -General William C. Westmoreland

“I never use the words Democrats and Republicans. It’s Liberals and Americans.” -James Watt “The ignorance of French society gives one a rough sense of the infinite.” -Joseph Renan “If we had to depend on the likes of the U.S. Postal Service to defend our country, we’d all be speaking Russian.” -Dartmouth Student “I believe in the two party system, but not in the same night.” -Fraternity Member “History: big abstract words with “isms” at the end.” -Dartmouth Professor “There is no damn reason for it; it is just our policy.” -Dean of Students at Princeton “I don’t know why we have a non-Western requirement. Who cares about the Third World anyway?” -Dartmouth Student


Hanover Iced Tea Ingredients

1 part Gin 1 part White Rum 1 part Silver Tequila 1 part Vodka 1 part Triple Sec 1 part Simple Syrup 1 part Lemon Juice Cola to Taste 1 Large KAF Hot Chocolate

Spring has finally sprung in our beloved town of Hanover. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the snow has long since melted. Our beloved green is a brown mud patch, and yet scores of the Dartmouth faithful still lounge about to enjoy the sun again for the first time in months. In this 80-degree weather, it is almost sacrilege not to don our seersuckers and sundresses and lounge out on the porches of our dear College for a little afternoon cocktail. After all, drinking outside is a storied Dartmouth summer tradition. With that in mind, we here at The Review would like to provide you with our take on the classic Long Island Iced Tea, tweaked just a bit for spring in Hanover. Mix one part gin (don’t tell Phil!), one part white rum, one part silver tequila, one part vodka, one part triple sec, one part simple syrup, and one part lemon juice. Add cola to taste. Pour over ice in a plastic Stinson’s cup and make yourself comfortable on your porch of choice. Then, scream in anguish as the sky darkens, the wind begins to blow, and the temperature drops thirty degrees. Pour out your drink, buy a large hot chocolate from KAF and spike it with enough rum to substitute for the jacket you thought you no longer needed. Retreat indoors and stay there until May. Cheers!

— Keg Norman

“If Apple ever has trouble making it as a corporation, it might consider applyingt for tax-exemption as a religion.” -Philip Schrodt “A dull, dark, depressing day in Winter: the whole world looks like a Methodist church at Wednesday night prayer meeting.” -H.L. Mencken “There are no umployed, either in Russia or in Dartmoor jail, and for the same reason: reson.” -Philip Snowden “The democrats are like a kamikaze group.”

-Mort Sahl

“If Apple ever has trouble making it as a corporation, it might consider applying for tax-exempt status as a religion.” -Philip Schrodt “In debate, one of my favorite words is ‘pismire’. Everyone thinks it’s a dirty word. Actually, it’s a little red ant.” -Senator Hugh Scott “There isn’t much to be seen in a small town, but what you hear makes up for it.” -Kin Hubbard “As an ultimate objective, “peace” simply means communist world control.” -Lenin


Business as Usual? (4/24/17 Issue)  
Business as Usual? (4/24/17 Issue)