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A Publication

Guide to the Ashes 2013 The Who, What, Where, Why & When of the biggest sporting event this year.

A guide for ladies that love

Cricket, Cricketers & Champagne

In This Guide

In This Guide

England Cricketers Page 6

Aussie Cricketers Page 13


3. Crickette


4. Introduction

20. The Commentators

Who am I


The Ashes?

5. Who am I watching?

22. What is The Ashes?

What is

6. England 13. Australia

1. In This Guide e k c ri .c w ww

Guide to the Ashes

Cricket Grounds Page 25

How to Watch Page 30

Where are

The Ashes Played? 25 Where are The Ashes played?

30. How to watch The Ashes When can I watch the greatest

26. Test Grounds

Cricket Contest?

27. Other Grounds

31. When to Watch

Why do we watch

The Ashes? 29. Why do we watch The Ashes?

2. In This Guide

@crick etteco


Guide to the Ashes


What is Crickette? Crickette is not a cricket expert. Crickette is an online blog for fans of cricket, the players and our own sport of watching the game with a drink in hand! We like to tweet, we like to post pictures, we like silly quotes and we love to see as many ladies as possible follow this fantastic sport. Why not join us for a summer of cricket, cricketers and champagne. Send us your photos all summer long, where are you watching? who are you watching? and what are you drinking?




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3. Crickette




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Guide to the Ashes


Pour A Glass This is set to be the most compact Ashes series combination ever, with the England causing a stir with the white ball (limited overs cricket) and Australia facing their most testing times since before I was born, this will be a series to remember. As I put this guide together, the UK has finally been bathed in sunshine and the first test is due to start in the hottest temperatures we have seen this year. This is the perfect time to grab a glass of chilled bubbly and either join us in the stands or relax in front of a TV and join us on twitter. This guide gives you a quick low down of who you will see this summer, as well as where you can see them along with the all important dates for your diary. Grab a glass, fill it up and get ready to join in with the ladies that love cricket.

Crickette x

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4. Introduction

Guide to the Ashes


Who am I

Watching? Let us start with the most important part of The Ashes: Who are we watching?

... ... Who is fighting for their place in the team? ... Who is the live wire? ... Who are the stars of the game? Who is in charge?

2 Squads will face each other from England and Australia over 12 matches, in 3 different formats. But we need to know who these men are and why we should watch them this summer.

Who has stripped naked?

The Sun Deprived

The Sun Drenched

V England Australia 5 Test Matches, 2 T20s & 5 ODIs = 1 great summer 5. Who am I watching?

Guide to the Ashes


England Captain

Alastair Cook Alastair is the captain of England for test cricket. He leads from the front as an opening batman and was born on Christmas Day in 1984. He has a strong army of female fans and stripped for Cosmo magazine!

6. England

Memorable Moment: A Crickette favourite moment has o be Alastair’s wedding. It was a very country affair and even his dog made an appearance in the ceremony!

Guide to the Ashes

Who? Batsmen (mostly)

Matt Prior Wicket Keeper Matt is classed as a wicket keeper batsman and has done the job for England on and off since his ODI debut in 2004. Notably he was born in South Africa but attended school here so we will let him off. His antics on the field can sometimes be controversial so keep an eye on him!

Ian Bell Ian is the shortest cricketer I have ever met. He is seemingly well mannered but has battled his way in to the team after runs of bad form. He is now a senior member of the team and has experienced The Ashes on both continents as a winner and a loser.


Joe Root The new boy in the team is pencilled in to open the batting with A.Cook. A young boy ready to make his mark on English cricket but will the pressure of the big occasion be too much for him? The girls are already loving Joe and they will be following his every move. Good Luck Joe! @joeroot05

7. England

Jonny Bairstow The cheeky ginger has worked his way in to the team through some fantastic county performances and being a stand out player for the Lions. This is the time for This is the time for Jonny to cement his place in the team and join the history books. @jbairstow21

Guide to the Ashes

Who? South Africans (that play for England)

England has a history with South Africa. Well more specifically South Africans coming to play for England. The current two below are the most outspoken of the South Africans in one way or another.

Kevin Pietersen

We have Nasser Hussain to blame for our acquisition of KP. He is said to have inspired KP’s move to the UK to play county cricket and his search for citizenship. KP has graced many a column inch and this series will be no different. With him apparently choosing his games and being the root of the toppled ex-captain, will he be able to keep his mouth in check & perform with the bat? p.s he is married to Liberty X Jessica. @Kp24

Jonathan Trott Jonathan is well known for his batting. Yes he has scored lots of runs be he also digs a full blown rabbit hole before he faces a ball and takes his time doing it! I’m sure the Australians will have a few choice words for his technique but will they sway his sometimes miserable demeanor? Keep an eye on his receding hair line that forehead island is growing!

8. England

Guide to the Ashes

Who? The Heart-throb (or All Rounder)

Stuart Broad

Memorable Moment:

A big football fan, Stuart plays for Nottingham so the first test will be at his home ground. He will hope this will give him an advantage and the home crowd will help he skittle Australias wickets.

In May this year Stuart achieved career best figures of 7 wickets for just 44 runs. This helped to blow the New Zealand opposition out of the water and see England win by 170 runs.

Stuarts fans are led by @TheBroadettes8 who he regularly communicates with. They have even organised raising money for the Broad Appeal, a charity ran by Stuart, his sister and his father in memory of his step mother.

His name now adorns the board of best bowling performances at Lords Cricket Ground - something he will be very proud of.


9. England

Guide to the Ashes

Who? The Bowlers

Graeme Swann The joker of the pack has a confidence to rival KP. He entertains the crowd and his team mates at every opportunity but lets his feeling be known on the field. He famously got let off a driving offence because his cat was stuck under the floor board. Look out for ECB videos of Swanny and his side kick Anderson. He tweets funny things too! @Swannyg66

Steven Finn The butt of many jokes within the England Team, Finny is always good to watch. He has a legion of female fans and if he is selected he will complete a very fast and tall bowling attack. He also has an issue with hitting the stumps as he runs in to bowl. This can get quite funny, unless the game is getting a bit too tight for comfort.


10. England

Guide to the Ashes

Who? The Record Breaker

James Anderson Only two England bowlers have taken more wickets that Anderson. This year he surpassed that magical 300 mark and will be hoping to add to it during The Ashes. He is a darling of Lancashire and you will no doubt hear the calling of ‘oh Jimmy Anderson’ in the stands.

Memorable Moment: Not only did Jimmy strip off for charity in Cosmo with Cook and Broad, he also stripped off for his gay fans in 2010 for a magazine spread. The article marked an acceptance that cricketers were no longer old and stuffy. A new type of fan emerged and together with his army of lady fans I am sure they will enjoy this summers entertainment.


11. England

Guide to the Ashes

Who? The Bowlers (and reserves)

Tim Bresnan

Graham Onions Graham made his debut in 2009 for England and has been in and out of favour ever since. He has saved the team from defeat in a few occasions with the bat. Affectionately known as Bunny Onions.

A Yorkshire lad through and through Bresnan will be hoping he makes the cut this time round. He is an all rounder capable of big performances under pressure. Let’s hope we get to see him play! @TimBresnan

Boyd Rankin Another new boy on the block, but this time he is Irish. We look forward to seeing Boyd get a chance in this series and will he bring a little of the Irish luck England’s way?


12. England


You may also see... Eoin Morgan You will undoubtedly see this Irish Paddler in the limited overs games. He can hit the ball unconventionally and a long way too!


Guide to the Ashes

Australia Captain

Michael Clarke Clarke took over the captaincy from the great Ricky Ponting during a time that has seen Australia struggle to regain their winning ways. Clarke’s nickname is ‘Pup’ which makes him all the more adorable to us!

13. Australia

Memorable Moment: In 2010 Clarke dramatically left a tour of New Zealand due to personal reasons. This turned out to be the end of his very media friendly relationship with model Lara Bingle. @Mclarke23

Guide to the Ashes

Who? Batsmen (from a land down under)

Brad Haddin Wicket Keeper Brad is getting on in years but only made his test debut in 2008. He will be hoping to remain as first choice keeper and contribute with the bat with an average of over 35 runs each match. We will be looking for some Australian fighting spirit & the chirping of a keeper.

Chris Rogers Chris is a left handed opening batsman and also bowls a legbreak googly. Confusing? We thought so! What you need to know is that we may see Chris but he has only featured in one test so far for Australia and that was in 2008. Are Australia on the backfoot with this one?

Phillip Hughes Hughes has been in and out of the side but has fought his way back in to the team. However his last outing to India was on the slow side but with a new management set we may see a difference. He is seen as part of the future of Australian cricket so we can’t wait to see what he will do in England.

Ed Cowan Cowan is another batsman trying to fight for his place in the team. He will need to produce some big scores to secure his place and use his experience at Notts to give him an advantage. We will be watching closely to see what he brings to the table. @eddiecowan

14. Australia

Guide to the Ashes

Who? The Muscle Man

Shane Watson Shane is one of Australia’s most experienced batsman. He is also a very useful bowler and performed with both bath and ball beyond expectations in 2012.

Memorable Moment:

On a recent tour of India Watson returned home in a wave of controversy after refusing to complete his ‘homework’. Thankfully this wasn’t the end of his career and with a new manager in place we may see more Shane friendly Shane isn’t shy about getting his muscles assignments to stop any further media out and graces the annual cricketers scrums. charity calendar and even stripped completely for a shoot that he may wish we never got hold of!

15. Australia

Guide to the Ashes

Who? The Bad Boy

David Warner Plucked from relative obscurity David has become one of the most expensive T20 players in the IPL. After a fantastic domestic T20 season he was called up for Australia and hasn’t looked back. He will be dangerous in the limited overs games, but will he keep his head cool enough to be in the test team and perform to a high standard? He is just like any other 26 year old & he will make great entertainment this summer.

16 Australia

Memorable Moment: In 2013 Warner’s hot head got the better of him and entered into a twitter attack on Australian journalists who he believed weren’t supporting the team correctly. This landed him in some bother with the cricket authorities but he has been included in the squad for the Ashes tour. One thing is for sure, every journalist will now have his twitter account listed!


Who? The Bowlers (who may also bat)

Steven Smith It was hard to know where to put Smith in this guide. He started out as a bowler who could bat a bit but recently his batting has taken centre stage. The baby faced boy will be hoping to produce repeat performances against the English and played his first ever international test match at Lords. What a way to start a career! We think his female fans will also increase during the series! @stevesmith49

James Faulkner James is yet to make his International test debut but this may be the time to do it. A young player compared to some of the team, he will be out to use his all round skills and experience in the IPL to help Australia secure a win. We will be watching closely to see if he gets a chance at test level. If not we will be watching as the limited overs games take us further into the summer. @FaulknerC25

James Pattinson Another spring chicken, James made his test debut in 2011 and took a crucial 5 wicket haul in his last test series against India. He will be hoping to take this form into the series against England. He can also hit the ball hard so don’t stand too close to him in the field! Just like Smith we envisage his female following to increase this summer. @jpattinson19

17. Australia

Guide to the Ashes

Guide to the Ashes

Who? A name you may recognise

Peter Siddle Peter made his test debut in 2007and made an immediate impact. This was short lived and he has been plagued by a stress fracture since 2010. He will be hoping to make his mark this year and avoid any return to injury. Noteworthy is that Peter has adopted a vegetarian diet in the past year. We wonder how this will go down on the field or if his body will have adapted to its new diet to endure the strain in the field. He is definitely one to keep an eye on.

18. Australia

Memorable Moment: More of a memorable feature of two. Siddle has the face of an angry man! He is well known for getting in the batsman’s face and has earned him the nickname Sidvicious. He has also chosen to sport some odd choices of neck jewellery over the years and you can be sure we will be checking out his ensembles during the series.

Guide to the Ashes

Who? More Bowlers Jackson Bird

Mitchell Starc

Jackson is a fast bowler who made his debut in 2012. He has been unable to keep his place in the team and will be hoping to be selected this time round. It will be interesting to see what he will do given the chance and if his father will find a live stream to watch his son from Romania where he works. @jackson_bird

Young Starc has made a good start as a fast bowler in the test side and he will be hoping to add to his previous performances in this series. Whatever happens Mitchell will see his popularity amongst the ladies soar this summer as he graces our TV screens. @mstarc56

Nathan Lyon

Ryan Harris Ryan is a prolific fast bowler but is plagued by a knee injury that will stay with him for his professional playing career. Will his body hold up against the English and will he be able to add with the bat when the time comes? He will be hoping this series is one of his best.

A real rags to riches story, Nathan was spotted as a cricketing talent after taking a job as a groundsman. His rise to International call up was nothing but magical and Australians put their spinning hopes in Lyon after the retirement of their great Shane Warne. @nathlyon421


And you may also see... Ashton Agra 19. Australia

Usman Khawaja

Matthew Wade

Guide to the Ashes



Commentators Sky Sports Ashes HD

Pay to View Made up of ex-professional cricketers the Sky Sports Team is often scoffed at by the cricket purist and the arm chair fan. It is true people like different styles of commentary but we love the tension between the players, some of whom had issues on the pitch as well as differences off it. We also love the batt humour of David ‘Bumble’ Lloyd, having held nearly every position possible to do with cricket he brings a mixture of knowledge, hilarious sightings, stories and weather reports to each match. Mix this with the alcohol knowledge of Ian ‘Beefy’ Botham, it can make for a particularly funny afternoon. And a huge plus is you can see what is happening!

20. The Commentators

Who? Free Commentary & Highlights

Test Match Special (TMS) More ex professionals pop up on TMS via BBC Radio 5 live. However you will need to get used to the overly posh and critical tones of Blowers if you are tuning in. To appeal to the young audience Radio 1 presenter Greg James is also making some cricket specials for radio.

Channel 5 Highlights Presented by Mark Nicholas, evening highlights of the matches will air on free to view Channel 5.This is always good for catching the best bits of the day and is included on their catch up service. They have enlisted Michael Vaughn to give a recent outlook to the team.

Test Match Sofa A favourite amongst journalists and hardcore cricket fans, Test Match Sofa is available online and is great for tuning in at work. They have a few celebrity friends who may pop up from time to time and they can provide some hilarious commentary to the game.

21.The Commentators

Guide to the Ashes

Guide to the Ashes


What is

The Ashes? The Urn The Trophy

Pub Quiz Fact! The Urn is given to the winners of the Ashes as a gift rather than a trophy. The Urn is rumoured to contain the ashes of a cricket bail and was presented to the England captain by a group of Melbourne women. The Urn was given due to an obituary published in The Sporting Times in 1882. After England lost to Australia for the first time on home turf it was reported that ‘English cricket had died’ and ‘the body will be cremated and the ashes taken to Australia’.

22. What is The Ashes?

Guide to the Ashes


The Ashes The Ashes has been played since 1882 and alternates between being hosted in England and Australia. This series is the most compact ever with England returning to Australia this very Winter, just three months after this series is complete. Oh well, we can’t feel too sorry for them - year round sunshine! It also means a great deal of Brits take the opportunity to spend the festive season on the beach and ‘throw a shrimp on the barbie’. Notably 66 Ashes series have been played and Australia currently lead with 31 wins to 30. There have been 5 drawn series as well. The Ashes have gained an increased following in recent years with celebrities taking to the stands and commentary boxes. During the height of Harry Potter fever the actors were asked to join TMS on the radio following in the footsteps of Lily Allen - the most unlikely chart topper to be seen in the stands. In addition we will always look to see the face of Stephen Fry in the Lords Members Stand.

Series Structure 5 Test Matches (maximum of 5 days each) 2 T20 Matches (20 overs per side) 5 One Day Internationals (50 overs per side)

30 Wi


23. What is The Ashes?

Guide to the Ashes


2005 A major turning point in the popularity of cricket and The Ashes came in the 2005 series in England. After years of domination by the legendary Australian players such as Shane Warne, Glen McGrath and Adam Gilchrist, England clutched victory in a series that went all the way to the final test at The Oval. It was England’s first win since 1987. The win sparked an interest in cricket that the ECB had been hoping for. Children up and down the country wanted to emulate Freddie Flintoff, whilst boys that had played the game at school picked up their bats once again. Local clubs were happy to accept new members up and down the country and grass roots cricket received a funding boost. This has meant better facilities, bars and equipment for us to enjoy whilst watching a local game of cricket.


31 W

24. What is The Ashes?


Guide to the Ashes

Where are

The Ashes Played? Lords The Home of Cricket

Lords Cricket Ground is the official home of cricket. The ground was built in 1814 and is situated in the St Johns Wood area of London. The ground also holds the oldest sports museum in the country. Tickets to Lords are by ballot system only and to become a member you need to give your soul to cricket (or go through a long referral process). If it rains: Pop on the tube to Harrods!

25 Where are The Ashes played?

Guide to the Ashes

Where? Test Grounds

Trent Bridge Trent Bridge is the home of Nottingham Cricket club and the ground picked for the first test this year. A favourite with many a fan girl due to the young Notts team, the ground prices are fair with people coming from both ends of the M1 to sit in the stands. Watch out for the Mcdonalds wrappers flying about. There’s one very close and the ground sometimes lets in the promotion girls. If it rains: You will find the men either in the adjoined pub or in Hooters down the road.

Old Trafford Old Trafford sits opposite the football ground of the same name in Manchester. It has recently received funding after losing out at the last Ashes home series. They have now built some red lego blocks to home a bar and exhibition space. Please don’t think you will find cheap beer here because it is ‘oop north’-LCCC is famous for its ‘business’ and this means you will be paying for the services you get. If it rains: Jump on the 250 bus outside to the Trafford Centre

26. Test Grounds


Guide to the Ashes

Test Grounds Emirates Durham Formerly known as Chester-let Street before a sponsorship deal, this ground has a beautiful view of Lumley Castle. If it rains: It most likely will. Bring a coat and an umbrella.

The Kia Oval The Oval traditionally hosts the final test. It is easily accessible via the tube and surrounded by pubs. If it rains: head to the Pimms Bus

Other grounds being used The Ageas Bowl The former Rose Bowl resides in Hampshire and now includes a rather ‘tenty’ looking stand. If it rains: Checkout the other activities they will be hosting during the year

27. Other Grounds

Edgbaston The summer wouldn’t be complete without a trip to Birmingham. I have bad memories of sunstroke and good memories of the catering. If it rains: head to the champagne tent

Guide to the Ashes

Where? Wales & Yorkshire

Headingley Sat in what can only be classed as student land, parking can be tricky. It is the only ground I have experienced a huge thunderstorm at! I’m sure the weather will be better this summer tho. This is undoubtedly the home of Yorkshire Tea so make sure you head to their van for a fine cuppa. They also serve some of the best prices beverages and snacks. If it rains: Head to the local co-op and you will find a surprise - A Greggs within! It must be a student thing.

SWALEC Stadium We must not forget that it is the England and WALES Cricket team. Therefore we will see a game at the home of Glamorgan in Cardiff. This can be a fantastic venue when the sun is shining. Unfortunately Wales is renowned for its rain so bring your waterproofs and Duckworth Lewis calculations. This could be an awkward one. If it rains: Try to find the @NailsStopPlay ladies - this is their hang out and they will point you in the right direction!

29. Other Grounds

Guide to the Ashes


Why do we watch

The Ashes? Why do we watch? I watch cricket for many reasons. Firstly I was brouht up watching the test matches on terrestrial tv, I find the game quite interesting and it actually relaxes me to sit and watch a few hours at a time. It also helps to structure my day, and I usually set myself little tasks to do during the lunch and tea breaks. I've also met some great people just like me who like to use social media to comment on the current happenings. It also sometimes funny to pick out the politics in team selections.

29. Why do we watch The Ashes?

I adore going to games. It forces me to be outside for hours and I desperately need a top up of vitamin D from the sun. The game is set up to allow you to drink at your own pace throughout the day with no restrictions to take your drinks into the stands - this is not football! Yes you will get ‘the noisy boys’ but they can be fantastically funny and provide the between over entertainment. There’s really not a reason to try it. Oh and the players can be pretty tasty too!

Guide to the Ashes

How? As cricket fans we tend to come up with our own rituals whilst watching the game unfold. However no matter who you speak to, they will always mention food and/or drink. A cricket tea for the players can be very elaborate or a huge picnic so here are a few ideas for snacks to keep you company.

Cricket Menu

Drinks Options

Smoked Salmon Sandwiches

Pimms (the official cricket drink) with chopped fruit & a sprig of mint

A Homemade Afternoon Tea

A well chilled cider with plenty of ice

Microwave Popcorn

A bottle of lager

Any type of homemade cake with many layers and butter cream

A cocktail of your choice in a suitable glass with a monkey & an umbrella

Cupcakes decorated in a cricket theme or with cricketer faces on sugar paper

A good quality fizz chilled perfectly in the fridge served in a tall champagne glass with a single strawberry

For those on a diet: a selection of vegetable crudites and some beetroot crisps

For those on a budget: a cheap cava chilled with a dash of orange juice

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30. How to watch The Ashes

Guide to the Ashes


When can I watch the greatest

Cricket Contest? Get these dates in your diary Test Matches July 10th - July 14th - 1st Test Trent Bridge - Nottingham July 18th - July 22nd - 2nd Test Lords - London August 1st - August 5th - 3rd Test Old Trafford - Manchester August 9th - August 13th - 4th test Emirites Durham - Durham August 21st - August 25th - 5th Test The Oval - London Don’t worry about a lot of these days being on a ‘work day’. Crickette will be at the day job too but we will be keeping up via the social media and live streams, updating when we can.

31. When to Watch

Guide to the Ashes

When? Some limited overs matches start later in the day which means we get to watch more after work.

T20 Series August 29th - 1st T20 Ageas Bowl-Hampshire (day/night game) August 31st - 2nd T20 Emirates Durham - Durham ODI Series September 6th - 1st ODI Headingley - Yorkshire September 8th - 2nd ODI Old Trafford - manchester September 11th - 3rd ODI Edgbaston - Birmingham (day/night game) September 14th - 4th ODI SWALEC Stadium -Cardiff September 16th - 5th ODI AGEAS Bowl - Hampshire (day/night game) 32. When to Watch

Guide to the Ashes

Keep up to date with all of the fun from The Ashes with

website: twitter: @crickettecouk facebook:

This is a free e-magazine courtesy of Feel free to send it your friends and spread the cricketing love amongst the ladies of the world. See you in the Champagne Tent!

Crickette Guide to The Ashes 2013  

The Who, What, Where, Why & When of this years cricketing summer.

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