Page 1



connection mag�ine april/May 18 Issue 81

Inside this issue... Book reviews Recipes What’s On


Country Mutters Puzzles Jane’s Walks

The Connection is delivered free to homes in Aldham, Fordham, Great Tey, Chappel, Wakes Colne, White Colne, Colne Engaine, Countess Cross, Pebmarsh, Earls Colne, Bures St Mary, Bures Hamlet, Mount Bures , Wormingford, West Bergholt, Eight Ash Green, Copford, Braiswick, Lexden, Coggeshall, Kelvedon and Feering. Also available in Halstead, Sudbury, Assington, Stoke by Nayland and Nayland.

Reaching the heart of the community!

Purpose built for babies from three months, Baby Pippins is set in idyllic orchards and staffed by a qualiďŹ ed, caring team. At two years our babies progress to Pippins, our accredited Montessori nursery.

01787 228 567 2

or visit

Pippins White’s Farm Bures Road White Colne Colchester CO6 2QF

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts



I was perhaps a little ahead of myself when I chose our front cover for the February/ March issue! It was somewhat Spring like and little did I know that the Beast from the East was about to descend upon us! I’m playing safe with this issue and going with potential April showers. I do hope it stays nice and rain free for the outdoor activities that are coming our way in April and May. Over the May Bank Holiday there’s going to be numerous walks organised by local people celebrating the legacy of Jane Jacobs. While walking, you will be invited to discover history trails and haunted Colchester. Take part in street photography or learn all about Colchester’s textile history and the local music scene. These are just a few examples of what will be on offer. There’s over twenty walks to choose from. Take a look at pages 20 and 21 for more details. Also, a little further afield and later on in May the Suffolk Walking Festival will begin and this promises to be good too. There’s also a Rural Ramble in Dunmow , a Pier to Pier walk in Clacton and a Bubble Rush at Highwoods Country Park in aid of St Helena’s Hospice. All details can be found on the What’s On and Notice Board pages.

6 - Home products 8 - Book Reviews 10 - Recipe 12 - Notice Board 14 - 19 What’s On 20 - 21 Jane’s Walks 22 - Country Mutters 24 - Sudoku 25 - Spot the Difference 26 - Codeword 28 - And Another Thing 29 - Puzzle solutions 29 - Useful Numbers 30 - Index


Editor and Publisher: Sarah Banks Editorial Assistant: Amanda Findley Contributors: Amanda Findley , Ann Haldon,Alison Runham and Tom Hughes. Advertising and Editorial: 01787 210701 / 07527 489847 Email: Address: Applegarth, Whitestreet Green, Boxford, Sudbury, Suffolk CO10 5JL

Please get in touch if you want to advertise your business. Call me on:

01787 210701 or email:

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in any retrieval systems or transmitted in any form - electronic, mechanical , photocopying, recording or otherwise - without the prior permission of the publisher.

Competition winner

£25 cash sudoku winner - D. Birkin from Maldon. TheConnectionMagazineColchester

Recently I met with Jacky Ling from Business Growth Landscaper who has a wealth of experience in the world of small businesses. Jacky’s on a mission to help home based and new business owners to maximise their potential in the marketplace and she does this through her one to one coaching sessions and her workshops. Q: What experience do you have? Jacky - “I’m a business development professional with 30 years’ experience in a variety of roles, businesses and market sectors in the UK. I cut my teeth in the family business many years ago calling pubs, restaurants, shops and tourists attractions for their chilled and frozen food orders, up selling and cross selling from the wide product range. Since then I have worked in telesales, account management and sales management roles in finance, advertising and online businesses to name a few. For more than ten years my background has been predominately in the management consulting, professional training, and coaching industries. I have a particular passion for the science behind how we learn. I am also a certificated performance coach and I have a creative collaborative style”.


Q: What type of business owners have you helped? Jacky - “A wide variety. Solicitors, accountants, personal trainers, coaches, marketers, social media, PR, photographers, publishers, networking business owners and image consultants, to name a few. I have also worked with a variety of multi level marketing business owners”. Here’s a small selection of testimonials. More can be found on the website or on Jacky’s Facebook page at businessgrowthlandscaper. Relaxed, informative, encouraging and reinforcing.... all without breaking the bank! Highly recommended.

Personal Trainer and Gym Owner

Fab session with Jacky today loved it could have stayed all day! Hospitality Attended a great session on Follow Up’s with Jacky today. She clearly knows her stuff and it was useful and thought provoking. She has a lovely approach to training others. Highly recommended! Photographer and Trainer

Advertisement Feature

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

Back by popular demand!

;7-m- †m1_ -| $_; -ѴѴ;u‹ Reopening Wednesday 4th April 12pm

ol; -m7 ;Šr;ub;m1; -m ;Š1bাm] 7bmbm] orাom -| "|oh; 0‹ -‹Ѵ-m7 o|;Ѵġ oŃ´= Ĺ&#x; "r-Äş Enjoy a quick and healthy Mediterranean-themed lunch bm o†u 1om|;lrou-u‹ Cuv| Yoou u;v|-†u-m|ġ $_; -Ń´Ń´;u‹ġ ‰_bŃ´v| ;mfo‹bm] r-mou-lb1 ˆb;‰v oˆ;u |_; Ń´-h; -m7 0;-Â†ŕŚž=†Ѵ uoŃ´Ń´bm] omv|-0Ń´; o†m|u‹Ĵ r;m om7-‹Ŋ ub7-‹ Ć?Ć‘rlĹŠĆ‘rlÄş oohbm]v -u; -7ˆbv;7 0†| mo| ;vv;mা-Ń´Äş

‰‰‰ĺv|oh;0‹m-‹Ѵ-m7Äş1ol $o 0ooh rŃ´;-v; 1-Ń´Ń´ Ć?Ć?Ć‘Ć?Ńľ ƑѾƔќƒƔ ou ;l-bŃ´ u;v;uˆ-াomvĹ v|oh;0‹m-‹Ѵ-m7Äş1olÄş Stoke by Nayland Hotel, Golf & Spa, Keepers Lane, Leavenheath, Colchester CO6 4PZ | Tel: 01206 262836


Luxury Private Hire Swimming Pool

for your exclusive and regular use

swimming pool White Colne, Colchester CO6 2QF t 01787 227 064 e

willow fences We specialise in weaving willow fences in situ. Our fences are tailormade to suit your Further information exact specification. please contact: Screens or fences, Angus Scobie curved or wall-mounted, 01787 227171 this organic material blends perfectly into all 07905 894869 natural environments. Whites Farm, Bures Road, White Colne, Colchester, Essex CO6 2QF


Home Products Decorating With Dark Colours

By Katherine Sorrell

Deeply dramatic interiors create a striking effect and are oh-so-fashionable. Do you dare to take the plunge?

Don’t Be SCareD of tHe DarK… • Dark colours can look warm, cosy and inviting, as well as intensely luxurious and sophisticated. They work especially well in a WC, snug, library, dining room, home office or games room, but – with a bit more decorative courage – are hugely effective in living rooms and bedrooms, too. • What colours to choose? Charcoal grey is intense and eye-catching, yet neutral enough to work as a backdrop for most furnishings. If you prefer a colour, however, navy, burgundy or forest green will make even more of an impact – but will be harder to co-ordinate with. • If all-over dark is simply too much, add drama to a room by painting or papering just one ‘feature’ wall in a distinctive deep colour, or perhaps choosing one or two key items of furniture with which to inject moody character. • Remember that surface textures affect how light or dark a room feels. Matt surfaces absorb light whereas glossy surfaces reflect it. Painting floorboards black, for example? Choose a high-gloss finish to shine light all around. • The deeper the background, the more other colours ‘pop’ out in front of it. Raspberry pink, crimson, lime, orange, emerald and mustard are all great choices for accessories in a dark colour scheme.


A deep blue makes a fabulous backdrop for vivid colours such as lime, pink or yellow. Annie Sloan chalk paint in Napoleonic Blue, £18.95 per litre. An oversized mural adds to the sense of drama in this inspiring black and red scheme. Kahrs Classic Oak Nouveau Charcoal Wood flooring, £69.99 per square metre, Carpetright.

A black splashback contributes intense style to a kitchen. These chevron tiles cleverly contrast matt and shiny surfaces. Chevron wall tiles in Black and Black Matt, £53 per square metre, The Baked Tile Company. This blue upholstery shines out when contrasted with a soft, dark grey backdrop. Algernon threeseater sofa in Mallard Blue velvet, £1,140; and Roscoe armchair in Teal, £455; both Perch & Parrow.

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

Ziel Design Sam Wilson Jugs from £15.95


Sophie Allport Garden Birds mug £11

Th he Shop forr People wh ho love theeir Ho ome... the Heeart of Eaarls Co olne

Painted wood lamp & shade £85

Tea Tidy £7.99 Seed Tin £14

Jola Designs small make up bags £13.95 The Old Forge, 39 High Street, Earls Colne CO6 2PA Tel: 01787 222989 • Monday - Saturday 10am - 5pm zielearlscolne •

Crackle glaze lamp base with shade £110


ADVERTISE HERE Established Local Trusted


Reach over 12,000 homes in over 20 villages E:

call: 01787 210701


Monday evening 6.30-8pm £7.00 Christchurch, Upstairs Hall, Coggeshall. A drop-in class, suitable for beginners, returners and experienced. If you’re interested in coming along and would like any further info, please contact Judy:

01376 564121 or 07710 281722


Be Happy With a Book Whether you love curling up with a psychological thriller or prefer biographies, enjoy flicking through a cookbook or need business advice, we’ve got just the book to keep you and your e-reader happy. How Not To Be a Boy – Robert Webb Actor and comedian Robert Webb has turned his hand to writing, with great success. How Not To Be a Boy is part biography, part reflection on the expectations that are put on boys and men to act a certain way. Webb reveals his grief at losing his mother and his difficult relationship with his father, and ruminates on how trying to ‘act like a man’ has had a negative effect on his life. Through it all, Webb writes with his trademark humour, taking the reader from laughing out loud to blinking back tears in moments. The History of Bees – Maja Lunde The History of Bees tells the stories of three people, all connected by bees. In 1851, William is attempting to build a revolutionary beehive to bring honour and fame to his family. In 2007, George is struggling to keep the family bee farm going. Almost 100 years later, Tao is enjoying a rare day off from her job hand-pollinating fruit trees, when her son is taken seriously ill. The History of Bees was a surprise international bestseller last year and is ideal for fans of dystopian fiction.


Anything You Do Say – Gillian McAllister A split second decision has lasting implications for the protagonist in this tense psychological thriller. Late at night, believing that she’s being followed, Joanna lashes out, pushing her pursuer down a set of concrete steps. Does she call an ambulance, or walk away? Both scenarios are then explored. Ingenious, original and fast-paced, this is perfect for fans of Gone Girl and Girl on a Train. The Paying Guests – Sarah Waters It’s 1922, but the roaring twenties have yet to reach the quiet corner of London where Frances and her mother live. Frances has resigned herself to a life spent looking after the family home, but the arrival of lodgers Lilian and Leonard Barber reawakens her life, energy and passions. Paying Guests was published in 2014 and was named ‘Fiction Book of the Year’ by The Sunday Times, for good reason. A modern classic, it’s beautifully written, with believably flawed characters, plot twists and a building tension that’ll keep you reading ‘just one more chapter’ until late into the night.

Ultimate Fit Food – Gordon Ramsay Planning to get a bit fitter before the summer? Gordon Ramsey’s latest book might help. It’s split into three sections, each of which offers a range of dishes to promote general wellbeing, achieve weight loss or provide fuel for work-outs. There are recipes for everything from healthy snacks and breakfasts to impressive main courses, and plenty of treats are included too. The emphasis is on dishes so delicious you’ll almost forget they’re good for you. Start Me Up – Various If you’re thinking of setting up your own business, take advice and inspiration from people who’ve done just that. Enterprise Nation is a website for small businesses and has recently released a free ebook. Start Me Up features stories from 100 entrepreneurs, including the owner of Cool Cold Brew, which will soon be available in Sainsbury’s, and the founder of the fastest growing baby food brand in the UK. You can download Start Me Up from the blog at www.

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts



Winners look like winners Book online at 45 Church Street, Coggeshall

01376 562160

Lorraine Whitby LCPH Established 1991

Homeopath & Holistic Therapist Would you like natural help for your wellbeing?

� Stress Management: rid yourself of fears � Support through concep�on, pregnancy, menopause � Protocols for be�er sleep – children and adults � Improve memory, focus, drive, concentra�on � Increase energy levels and vitality � Relaxa�on through Hypnotherapy and Reflexology � Nutri�onal assessment

Consulta�ons available in Earls Colne, Chappel and Southend License to prac�ce from Essex County Council – Fully insured Call Lorraine to discuss your needs on 07590 644778, or contact her via


Spice Crusted

Baked Salmon fillets Serves 6

ready in 1 hour

this salmon dish is ideal for easy weekend entertaining. Bake the day before and when cold cover and chill in the fridge overnight. allow to come to room temperature for 30 minutes before serving.

• 6 x 150g salmon fillets • 2tsp mild chilli powder • 2tsp ground coriander • 2tsp ground cumin • 1/2tsp freshly ground black pepper • Squeeze of lemon or lime juice • 2tbsp olive oil TO SERVE • 6tbsp mayonnaise or soured cream • 2 spring onions, trimmed and finely chopped • Zest and juice from 1 lime • Lime wedges and spring onion curls (see tip) to garnish


Preheat the oven to 200C, 180C Fan, Gas 6. Run your fingers along the top of the salmon fillets and remove any fine bones with tweezers. Mix together the spices and rub over the surface of the salmon fillets. Season with a little salt. Place the salmon pieces in a foil-lined roasting tin. Whisk together the lime or lemon juice and oil and drizzle over the salmon. Bake for 20-25 minutes until the salmon is just cooked to the centre. Remove from the oven and leave to cool completely. Arrange the cold salmon fillets on a platter. Mix together the mayonnaise or soured cream, spring onions and lime zest and juice. Serve the salmon and mayonnaise garnished with lime wedges and spring onion curls.

tIP To make spring onion curls use a sharp knife to thinly shred a few spring onions. Place in a bowl of iced water and leave in the fridge for about 1 hour until curled. Drain on kitchen paper before using.

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

Non caustic Biodegradable products Fully Insured Trading standards approved and all technicians are CRB checked Trading since 2005 We clean all makes of cookers inc. Aga’s, Ranges, Rayburn, Microwaves, BBQ, also clean Extractor Fans and Hobs, Fridges, Freezers and Dishwashers. Clean includes shelves, loose panels, grill pans and roasting trays supplied with the oven. We dismantle and clean inside the glass on your oven doors, remove and clean behind control knobs (where possible). We also carry some spares such as hinges and door seals and carry replacement lamps to suit most ovens.

Contact Essex Ovencleaners

Telephone: 01245 451 003 Mobile: 07816 762 869 Email:

Lady Interior Decorator 20 years experience Does your home need decorating, but you have no time to do it?

Ring Alison Walters 01787 221937 Good Work/Quick & Tidy Colour & Design advice available


Notice Board Marks Hall Garden and Country Show

Following the continued success of this bi-annual show, the event returns on Saturday 21st and Sunday 22nd July, with the hope to raise £50,000 for the three charities, Essex and Herts Air Ambulance, Marks Hall and the Rotary Club of Colchester. As part of this show we are again looking for ‘budding’ young children in Essex and Suffolk to enter our ‘Grub in a Tub’ display. The theme is for edible plants grown in a container and the finished container can be anything in which a plant can grow successfully. Entries must be portable so that they can be brought along and displayed at the show. The entries can be by individuals, schools or other youth groups such as Cubs, Brownies, beavers etc. Now is the time for those wishing to enter to start thinking about and planning their display. More information and entry details are available by emailing for an entry form.

Pippins nursery

Pippins Nursery has an opportunity for a level 3 childcare practitioner to work in its Ofsted outstanding nursery. This is a full time position within an enthusiastic setting with a hardworking and committed staff team. Please contact Lynne Dear on 01787 228567 for further information.

Magazine Distributors required

Like walking? Get paid to exercise! We are looking for adult, mobile distributors for all our distribution areas to join our existing excellent team to deliver either on a permanent or regular basis, or on a part-time basis for holiday and sickness cover. Villages include, Aldham, West Bergholt, Eight Ash Green, Fordham, Fordham Heath, Pebmarsh, Bures, Colne Engaine, White Colne, Earls Colne, Coggeshall, Kelvedon and Feering. Please register your interest by emailing;

Local W.I. groups

The Connection Magazine is delivered to homes in many villages throughout the Colne Valley. If you’re on a W.I. committee and recieve your magazine through your letterbox and are looking to increase your membership, then please do get in touch with us. We will happily publish group details here on the Notice Board page.

“Music through the Decades”

Aldham Village Hall Saturday 14th April 2018. An evening of music. The evening is devoted to popular music from the 40’s to the present day. Entry by ticket only. Tickets £10.00 each which includes a substantial buffet, music, dancing (if you like), a music Quiz and an Auction of Promises. Social Club Bar open all evening. Contact Andy on 01206 210963 or Anne on 01206 211624 for further details and tickets. The event starts at

Call for entries Walk to support St Helena Hospice at Pier to Pier 2018!

Come together with your friends, family and work colleagues on Sunday 22nd April and enjoy the sea air and fantastic atmosphere at the St Helena Hospice Pier to Pier 2018 sponsored walk! You can start your walk at 10am from either Clacton or Walton Pier and have a choice to walk 7 or 14 miles. The walk is a great opportunity to reminisce on good times with loved ones or to catch up with friends. Lots of our walkers take part in memory of someone close to them who has died, walk for a catch up with old friends, or sign up a team from work to get to know each other better! Register for free today by visiting piertopier18 or by calling the events team on 01206 931468.


We are pleased to invite all children in Essex and Suffolk to enter a tub display at our major charity garden show in July. The theme for the edible container display is Grub in a Tub 21st 22nd July 2018 Marks Hall Garden & Country Show Marks Hall Gardens and Arboretum Coggeshall, Essex CO6 1TG

For more information or to obtain an entry form please email nigel@garden

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

The story behind Doogles Dog Grooming

In 2011 I was looking for another dog. My dog at the time George was in the last few months of his life. Knowing that George was on borrowed time I decided I didn’t want to be without a dog so began looking into re homing one. On Easter Monday we welcomed ‘Doogle’ into our home. We named him Doogle because his previous owners had only ever named him Dog. So Doogle was the closest I could get to dog without continuing to call him dog! Little did I know the changes ahead Doogle had in store for me. Unlike George, Doogle required regular visits to the Dog Groomers. And so, my interest began. Having always been a dog lover, I had finally found a career that interested me and involved dogs! I went on to train at Writtle College. I have completed my City and Guilds Level 2 & 3 qualifications and spent the last 2-3 years working at a local grooming parlour gaining experience on a variety of breeds. Fast forward to 2018 and now ‘Doogles Dog Grooming’ is open. I have set up a parlour within my own home meaning I can offer a personal one to one service with my customers. Jane Turley - Proprietor of Doogles Dog Grooming

❅ 13


BANK HOLIDAY FUN DAYS 6 & 7 May Inflatable assault course, treasure hunt, steam train rides, petting zoo and real ale from our miniature pub, The Viaduct.

FATHER’S DAY STEAM UP! - Dads go FREE 17 June Dads drive a diesel loco or take a family steam train ride. We’ll fire up our BBQ or simply bring a picnic and relax in our lovely rural surroundings.

KIDS RUN THE RAILWAY 14 April | 21 July | 18 August Let off steam at our new kids’ activity days… Operate the signals, be a crossing keeper or guard and ride a diesel train.

SUMMER STEAM GALA 8 July Join us as we celebrate our 50-year anniversary. All of our steam engines will be running - a full day of intensive steam engine action!

TRANSPORT EXTRAVAGANZA 27 & 28 May Classic cars, vintage motorbikes and modern head turners as well auto jumble and steam train rides on this great family day out.

A STEAMY VINTAGE ENCOUNTER 29 July Steam train rides, vintage stalls and scrumptious teas, swing jive workshops and live music from the fabulous Fox, Wiggle & Sass.


Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

What’s On General Fellowship Meetings At the United Reformed Church, Kelvedon

Thursday 19th April 12 noon – 2.00pm Come and join us in the main hall for a Fish and Chip lunch with tea/ coffee and a time to chat. Everyone welcome. Thursday 10th May 2.00pm - 3.30pm Come and join us in the main hall with Baz & Harv (music duo) followed by tea/coffee and a time to chat. Everyone welcome, free of charge. For more information please call Gwyn Pegram on 07875 109472.

Shopping Day

St Helena Hospice Bubble Rush At High Woods Country Park, Colchester Saturday 9th June 11.00am – 4.00pm A total of 5 bubble cannons will blast out colourful bubbles as you run, walk or dance around the 5km course. This is a family friendly event for all ages and abilities. Wheelchairs and prams are welcome but please be aware of the hilly terrain around the park. There will also be a bubble village where there will be activities and refreshments for both participants and spectators to enjoy! Sign up now to be part of the bubble fun at sthelenahospice. or by calling St Helena Hospice’s Fundraising Team on 01206 931468.

Rural Ramble

At Lavenham Village Hall, Church St, Lavenham CO10 9QT

At The Forgotten Gardens of Easton Lodge, Little Easton, Dunmow CM6 2BD

Monday 30th April 10.00am – 3.00pm

Saturday 14th April

Supporting Cancer Research UK. Hotfooted ladies shoes, collections of ladies clothes, jewellery, fashion accessories, gifts, plants and more. £3 entrance to Cancer Research UK (£2 after 1.00pm). Refreshments and light lunches available.

This is a unique opportunity to enjoy a beautiful walk in aid of the Helen Rollason Cancer Charity. There are three distance options for participants to choose from; 10 mile walk and garden visit, 4 mile walk and garden visit or a 1 mile walk family trail and garden visit. As part of the visit a delicious

cream tea is included with each ticket, or if you prefer you can just simply explore the gardens at your leisure and then enjoy your cream tea.

homemade teas, hot dogs, strawberries and cream. Adults £2, children 50p, concessions £1. Free parking. All proceeds to St James Fabric Fund.

You can register online at www.helenrollason. or call 01245 380719. The closing date for registration is Friday 6th April.

Flower Festival and Display and Sale of Paintings by local Artists

Ride for Helen At the Crix, Hatfield Peverel, Essex Sunday 13th May Cycle ride open to riders of all ages and abilities. Wherever possible all of the routes seek to avoid main roads, so it’s your choice as to which distance you decide to ride: 6, 15, 35, 65 or 100 miles all in aid of the Helen Rollason Cancer Charity. For more information please visit www.

Nayland Church Fete At Nayland Playing Field, Nayland

Monday 28th May 1.30pm Plants, jewellery, china, toys, vintage, glass and garden tools stalls, sports races, tug of war, sideshows and The Victory Jazz Band. Refreshments include ice cream,

At All Saints Church, Little Cornard CO10 0PD Saturday 12th May and Sunday 13th May 11.00am – 4.00pm Flowers and a display of paintings by local artists. There will be a cake stall and refreshments of scrumptious cakes and drinks and a well stocked plant sale. Supporting Success after Stroke (Gt. Cornard), Repair fund for Little Cornard Village Hall and Church Funds. For more information please call Brenda on 01787 227615.

Bures Open Gardens At Bures, near Colchester Saturday 26th and Sunday 27th May 1.00pm - 6.00pm Approximately 20 village gardens open over two days. This year’s event will have a dragon theme. In addition, there will be an art exhibition and sale, cream teas, cake and book stall. Refreshments

What’s On continued over page

What’s On in various gardens and St Mary‘s Church. There will be a pop-up restaurant on Bures Common on Sunday from 12 noon to 2.00pm, weather permitting. Proceeds to St Mary‘s Church and Essex and Herts Air Ambulance. Plant sales in various gardens. £5 entrance which covers two days, accompanied under 16s free. Tickets can be purchased from the church, Bures Post Office and from various gardens.

Coggeshall Art Group Annual Exhibition 2018 At the Church of St.Peter ad Vincula, Church Green, Coggeshall CO6 1UD Friday 4th May 9.00am – 4.00pm, Saturday 5th May 9.00am – 4.00pm, Sunday 6th May 12.30 – 5.00pm and Monday 7th May 9.00am – 4.00pm. Come and enjoy the usual high standard of artwork, in a wide range of styles and media, by local artists in a new venue at the church. There is no entry fee, just an invitation to make a voluntary donation to Church upkeep and local charities. All artwork will be for sale. For more information please see Coggeshall Art Group Facebook page or contact: Sue Fraser on 01376 563518 or email

Chappel & Wakes Colne Village Hall Craft Fayre At Chappel & Wakes Colne Village Hall Saturday 14th April 10.30am - 5.30pm Numerous stalls including jewellery, clothes, cakes, cards, and many more. Refreshments available. The Village Hall restoration work is ongoing and we need your support please to help raise funds.

Events at the East Anglian Railway Museum At the East Anglian Railway Museum, Chappel Station, Colchester CO6 2DS Bank Holiday Fun Days Sunday 6th and Monday 7th May Inflatable assault course, treasure hunt, steam train rides, petting zoo and real ale from our miniature pub, The Viaduct.

train rides on this great family day out. For more information please visit www. or call 01206 242524.

Events at Prested Hall Friday April 27th 7.00pm - late

Ladies Night at Prested Hall Great food, photobooth, naked waiters and dancing. What more could you want?! Come and let your hair down with the girls in the relaxing surroundings of Prested Hall. Tickets £40 call 01376 573300 to book Sunday April 29th 12.00pm – 4.00pm

Kids Run the Railway

Transport Extravaganza Sunday 27th and Monday 28th May Classic cars, vintage motorbikes and modern head turners as well auto jumble and steam

At St Peter’s CofE School, Myneer Park, Coggeshall CO6 1YU Sunday 20th May 12.00 noon – 4.00pm Enjoy an afternoon of unlimited bouncing and fun on the Giggle City inflatables and rides. There will be a BBQ, bar and stalls. £5.99 per wristband For more information please email: lynda.

Quality Jumble Sale At St Francis Church Hall, Colchester Rd, Halstead (opposite cemetery). Saturday 14th April 9.30am - 11.30am Good quality clothing for all ages. Bric-a-brac, household goods, books and more. Free car parking. 20p admission. All proceeds to be donated to charity.

Copford Scarecrow Festival

Saturday 14th April Let off steam at our new kids’ activity days… Operate the signals, be a crossing keeper or guard and ride a diesel train.

St Peter’s Family Inflatables Fun Day

Prested Hall Wedding Fair A wealth of wedding experience at Prested Hall, plus a chance to view the rooms and meet the team. Perfect for anyone planning to get married. Expect top tips, helpful information and great advice.

Saturday 10th – Sunday 24th June Scarecrows on a theme of movie stars and film characters throughout Copford. Prizes and

What’s On winners announced at the Strawberry Tea and Mini Fete on Sunday 24th June 1.00pm – 4.00pm at Copford School.

and tombola. Our Songs of Praise service will be at 6.30pm on Sunday.

For more information please contact Sarah on 01206 212525 or email

At St Andrew’s church, Park Lane, Earls Colne.

Pew Boot Sale

Janes Walk Friday 4th – Monday 7th May A weekend festival of local walks (in Colchester, and in towns and cities worldwide), honouring the late urbanist and activist Jane Jacobs. For more information please see pages 20 - 21 or visit: www. walkcolchester.wordpress. com/janes-walk-2018/

Ardleigh & District Horticultural Society Plant Sale At Ardleigh Village Hall, Station Road, Ardleigh CO7 7RS Saturday 19th May 9.30am – 11.30am Plants, cakes and refreshments.

Wormingford Flower Festival At St Andrew’s Church, Wormingford Saturday 26th Monday 28th May 10.00am – 5.00pm. The theme is “Up London Town”. St Andrews pantry will be selling home-made produce and serving lunches and cream teas. Also there will be our usual Bric a Brac

Saturday 14th April 10.00am – 12.00 Second hand clothes, toys, books and more. Refreshments available. To sell please contact Helen on 01787 222526.

Plant Sale At Aldham Village Hall Sunday 13th May 2.00pm – 5.00pm The hugely popular Plant Sale is now in its 5th year and getting bigger every year. Large and varied selection of perennials, also geraniums, herbs, tomato and vegetable plants. Afternoon teas available. £4 free entry.

The 2018 Suffolk Walking Festival Saturday 12th May – Sunday 3rd June You can kick start your day with a Dawn Chorus Walk, try Nordic Walking, discover the amazing history of Suffolk’s Wool Towns and have a go at GeoCaching. There are short strolls to long hikes and everything in between including the launch of the Walking

Festival Fringe, a series of exciting and imaginative events that get you close to nature in the very heart of the countryside. Experience a “Woodland Twilight Safari”, capture “Iconic Images” on our photo assignments, and experience a “Hedgerow Cream Tea” where you gather your very own afternoon feast! For more information please visit: www. suffolkwalkingfestival.

33rd Colchester Real Ale and Cider Festival At Colchester Arts Centre, Colchester

The Britishness Project At Firstsite, Colchester On now until Sunday 17th June A groundbreaking exhibition that explores national identity through art. Works in a variety of mediums including collage, stop motion animation, sculpture and photography, and engage with ideas of identity, landscape, sub-culture, democracy and political voice. By inviting young people to speak up about issues that affect them and their future, this is an opportunity to generate wide-ranging conversations in a public forum on the shifting social, geographic and political identity of Britain.

Geeks – Colchester Comic Con Tuesday 29th May - Saturday 2rd June 12 noon – 11.00pm every day. The festival will offer over 160 real ales, Real Cider and Perry, Belgian Beers, English Wines and Soft Drinks. Live Music on Saturday night. Food available at all sessions. Free entry to cardcarrying CAMRA members. Others free entry 12 noon to 3.00pm, £3 thereafter. No advance booking - please pay on the door. Accompanied children welcome until 6.30pm. Full wheelchair access available.

At Charter Hall, Colchester Leisure World Saturday 5th – Sunday 6th May 10.00am – 5.00pm Jam packed with interactive games and stage show, the UK’s finest traders, a fantastic cosplay competition, and prop displays to keep you all entertained over the weekend. In a first for GEEKS Events, we are dedicating Saturday to our super celebrity guests

What’s On continued over page

What’s On from Red Dwarf, Game of Thrones, Doctor Who and more, and Sunday to fantastic cosplayers. For ticket information please visit www.

Music Another Evening of Song At The Headgate Theatre, Colchester Saturday 14th April 7.30pm Quattro Amici, the popular and exciting vocal quartet returns to the Headgate to present an evening of music to suit all tastes - from opera and operetta, to modern musical theatre via Broadway musicals, and modern pop. With a wide variety of quartets, duets and solos (and a live piano accompaniment), there will be something for all to enjoy. Tickets: £12, £10 (conc) from www.

Free Music Recitals At St Andrew’s church, Earls Colne Thursday 12th April and Thursday 10th May 1.00pm - 1.45pm Refreshments are available beforehand for a donation. For more information please contact Liz on 01376 561307.

Concert Celebrating the Life of the late Roy Teed by the Colchester Symphony Orchestra At St Botolph’s Church, Colchester Saturday 21st April 7.30pm A wonderful programme with outstanding soloists. Our programme includes Brahms’ Double Concerto for violin and ‘cello with soloists Martyn Jackson and Rowena Calvert, Grieg’s ‘Peer Gynt Suite’, Roy Teed’s ‘Phantasy for Flute and Strings’ with soloist Debbie Rogers and Symphony no. 7 by Sibelius. Tickets are £15, £13 concessions, £3 students. Under 17’s are admitted free to all our concerts. Tickets are available on the door or may be reserved in advance by calling 01206 271128. Please see www. colchestersymphonyorchestra. or colchestersymphonyorchestra for further information.

Hallelujah At St James’Church, Nayland. Saturday 21st April 7.00pm Nayland Choir will sing several well-known choral pieces by some of the greatest classical composers, particularly Handel. One half of

the concert will be a shortened version of The Messiah, and the choir will be joined by Nayland school choirs to perform the Hallelujah chorus. The other half will include approachable works by Haydn, Mozart and Bach. Tickets £10, under 16s free, from Nayland Post Office, any choir member, on the door, or call 07954 334548.

Cinema Leavenheath Village Hall Digital Cinema At Leavenheath Village Hall, Wrights Way, (signposted from the High Road) Doors open 7.00pm for 7.30pm start. Refreshments (wine, beer, soft drinks, tea and coffee) will be available before the film starts and during the interval. Tickets £3.50 per adult and £2 per child. You can now reserve your seat online at or please call Lesley 01206 262505 or Ken 01206 263266 for tickets. Saturday 7th April ‘Breathe’(12A) Starring Andrew Garfield, Claire Foy, Tom Hollander, Hugh Bonneville, Diana Rigg, Ed Speleers. The inspiring true love story of Robin and Diana Cavendish, an adventurous couple who refuse to give up in the face of a

devastating disease. Their heartwarming celebration of human possibility marks the directorial debut of Andy Serkis.

Dedham Films At The Assembly Rooms, High St, Dedham Dedham films screens a monthly feature on the third Wednesday of each month, 7.00pm doors open, 7.30pm film begins. If there is a suitable break in the film, there is a 15 minute intermission for drinks at the bar and ice cream. There is open seating at all our screenings, so get there early. Tickets are £4. There are usually a few tickets for sale at the door, but this cannot be guaranteed so please buy your tickets at the previous screening or as soon as you can from Shakespeare House Gallery, Dedham High Street or online at www. Wednesday 18th April ‘The Death of Stalin’(R) The one-liners fly fast in this uproarious, wickedly irreverent satire. Moscow 1953: when dictator Joseph Stalin drops dead, his parasitic cronies square off in a frantic power struggle. But as they brawl, and backstab their way to the top, just who is running the government? With rapidfire farce, this audacious comedy is bitingly funny and performed by a sparkling cast.

What’s On Wednesday 16th May ‘Paddington 2’(PG) Paddington is happily settled with the Brown family in Windsor Gardens, where he has become a popular member of the community, spreading joy and marmalade wherever he goes. While searching for the perfect present for his beloved Aunt Lucy’s 100th birthday, Paddington spots a unique pop-up book in Mr. Gruber’s antique shop, and embarks upon a series of odd jobs to buy it. But when the book is stolen, it’s up to Paddington and the Browns to unmask the thief.

Talks and Workshops Feering and Kelvedon Garden Club

narrow boats and sale of artifacts. Members £1, visitors £2. All Welcome. For further information please contact Annie Northfield on 01376 5127527.

Colne Valley Flower Club events Wednesday 18th April 7.30pm At Orpen Hall West Bergholt

Demonstration by David Wright Wednesday 16th May 7.30pm At Orpen Hall West Bergholt Members meeting and plant sale. For more information please contact Manya on 07759 331719 or Alison on 01206 240262.

A talk entitled “Roses and Castles” by Keith Liley; all about traditional craft of

With no further obligation. You really have nothing to lose. No experience needed! Just come and RELAX and see the difference it will make to your life! And those around you!

Colchester Farmers Market The Arts Centre, Colchester Friday 6th April and Friday 4th May at 9.30am - 12.30pm Contact Rowley Castiglione 01206 367776

Wivenhoe Farmers Market

Please contact Kathryn on 07721 437372.

Congregational Hall, Wivenhoe

Farmers Markets

Saturday 21st April and Saturday 19th May at 9.30am - 12.30

Please note that some dates may be liable to change so for more information contact individual markets for details.

Lavenham Farmers Market At The Village Hall, Lavenham

At The Institute, Kelvedon Tuesday May 1st 7.30pm for 8.00pm start

Relax! Brilliant new concept. Weekly sessions across Colchester and surrounding area. Please get in touch and we’ll save a space for you. By the way, the first session is FREE, on us, no charge.

Contact Rowley Castiglione 01206 367776

Sudbury Farmers Market At St Peters Church, Sudbury

Stressed? Tired? Uninspired? Fed Up? Not Sleeping?

Sunday 22nd April and Sunday 27th May at 10.00am - 1.30pm

Friday 27th April and Friday 25th May at 9.30am - 2.00pm

Then you need one of our relaxation classes.

Contact Justine Paul 07704 627973

Contact Justine Paul 07704 627973

The Connection has listed all the events in What’s On in good faith. We cannot accept responsibility for inaccuracies, changes to events or cancellations. It might be advisable to check with venues before attendance.

Feature your not for profit, village, community or charity events FREE OF CHARGE in our What’s On pages by emailing your listing to We also welcome details of slimming groups, keep fit classes, language courses, farmers markets, boot sales and regular clubs, groups and societies.

An international weekend of local walks led by local people, in celebration of the urbanist and activist Jane Jacobs (1916-2006). Thursday 3rd May EVENT (FORUM & ORBITAL LAUNCH) Colchester’s 1st Forum on Walking (networking event) and launch of The Colchester Orbital. Venue: The Minories Café, 74 High St. 7-9pm

Friday 4th May WALK: Photographing Campus (University of Essex) A look at the varied architecture of the University and discussion on photographing buildings. With Peter Brothers. Meet: 1pm, centre of Square 2 (1hr) WALK: All Trees Great & Small (Uni of Essex) An intro to 30 of Wivenhoe Park’s finest trees with expert on all things dendrological Christopher Howard. Meet: 5pm, outside The Silberrad Centre (1.5hrs) EVENT (FILM & FESTIVAL LAUNCH) Citizen Jane: Battle for the City (2016) Documentary about festival namesake, Jane Jacobs. After party with DJ Sam Leppard. Venue: Firstsite, 7-11pm.

Saturday 5th May WALK/S (all day!) Walk on the Wild Side at Bourne Valley! A day of walks & nature activities for all ages (11.30am - 3.30pm). Meet: 11.30am Bourne Mill, or come and find the welcome tent! CYCLE: A Jane’s Cycle (The Colchester Orbital) With Nick Oakley. Meet: 10.30am, High Woods Visitor Centre (approx. 14m; 2.5 hrs) WALK: The Hythe & its 3 Quays Stories, history and regeneration. Visit the Colne Lightship & other POI. Share memories & views. With Belinda Baker. Meet: 10am, Hythe Community Centre (2.5hrs) WALK: Colchester Remarkables Some of the curious things and remarkable people of Colchester - walk and street theatre. With Dorian Kelly. Meet: 11am, outside Colchester Central Library, Lion Walk (2.5hrs) WALK: Concrete Legacy: The murals of Henry Collins & Joyce Pallot A restoration update. With Kath Wood & Ann Turner. Meet: 1.30pm, Town centre Sainsburys, Priory Walk (1.5hrs) WALK: Colchester’s New Northern Face Explore the diverse, changing landscape & architecture of the town’s northern approach. With Robert Johnstone. Meet: 2pm, ECC Park and Ride (1.5 hrs)

WALK: The Story of Colchester’s Water Supply Filthy water at wells to clean water for all on tap – intrigue, conflict and humour! With Brian Light. Meet: 2.30pm, Jumbo Water Tower (2hrs) WALK: Inspired by Colchester - A Literary Trail of Books in & about Colchester Through the Ages With Alex Clare et al. Meet: Town Hall, 3pm (1.5hrs) WALK: Birds of the lower Colne An early evening walk along the river, from Jumbo to Wivenhoe (with peregrine observation post at the 6th Form College). With Michael Padmore. Meet: 5pm at Jumbo (3hrs)

Sunday 6th May WALK: Walk the Colchester Orbital With Jane Hindley. Meet: 11am, High Woods Visitor’s Ctr Car Pk (ap. 15 m; 5-6hrs) WALK: The murder of the child John Harding, and life in Victorian Colchester With Alex Jones. Meet: 11am, Abbey Gate, St John’s Green (2hrs) WALK: Forage the Dyke A walk through history; Gryme’s Dyke, the Romans & the plants they foraged. With Mitch McLean. Meet 11am, The Leather Bottle, or 11.15am, Gosbecks Archeology car park (3.5hrs) WALK: All Trees Great & Small (Colchester Castle Park) A tour of 60 of the beautiful trees gracing the park. With Christopher Howard. Meet: 2pm, at the bridge to castle entrance (2hrs) WALK: Monkwick Memories History, childhood stories & ghosts! St Michael’s Ch., Audley Chapel & Iron Age dykes (Charlotte’s Grove). With Wayne Baker & Cllr Dave Harris. Meet: 2pm, The Silver Oyster PH (2hrs) WALK: Colchester Quaker History Trail: from the 17th century to the present With Rosalind Kaye. Meet: 2.30pm, Minories Café/garden (2hrs) EVENT (FILM) Walking the Camino: Six Ways to Santiago (2013) Film followed by Q&A with pilgrims Kath Wood, and Adam Wells (Head of UK Distribution, Firstsite, 5-7.30pm. WALK: Haunted Colchester: East to West With Rob Brown. Meet: 8pm, The historic (& haunted) Town Hall (1.5hrs)

Monday 7th May WALK: Labour Day, Living Wage Join trade union activists with megaphone for a walk/talk on campaigns, wages & workers’ rights. With Rebecca Rocket. Meet: 10am, Job Centre, 40 Chapel St (1.5hrs)

WALK: Colchester’s Music Scene Local venues, past & present, which have hosted the likes of AC/DC, The Stones, Radiohead. With Ben (Benedetti & Howard) & Carl Allen. Meet: 2pm, The George Hotel (2 hrs)

WALK: Greener Living in Colchester You are invited to travel sustainably to this walk. With Mark Goacher & Pam Nelson. Meet: 10.30am at The Minories (2hrs)

WALK: Colchester Quaker History Trail: from the 17th century to the present With Rosalind Kaye. Meet: 3.30pm, Minories Café/garden (2hrs)

WALK: Street photography: capturing Colchester’s shopping streets With Jonathan Doyle. Meet: 11.30am, Space Studios, 37 Queen St (2hrs)

EVENT (FILM): Redwood Highway (2013) Film followed by festival closing drink! Firstsite, 6-7.30pm.

WALK: Unravelling Colchester’s textile history A journey looking for clues to Colchester historical links with the textile industry. With Lorraine James & Anni Howard. Meet: 12noon, Minories Café (1.5hrs)

All walks and events are FREE and OPEN TO ALL. All times approximate. Please see website for further walk details and accessibility info; also for films/events connected with the festival


Gardens & Arboretum

A striking heritage landscape in Coggeshall, with an enviable collection of mature trees and leafy paths. Enjoy home cooked food in our Essex barn and browse the plant centre and gift shop. See our website for tree climbing, outdoor theatre and children’s trails. Feel inspired.

t.01376 563796


Country Mutters Virtually There By Lady Muck Watching a Herculean struggle for Olympic Gold in the ice hockey final from the comfort of my armchair recently, I found myself yearning for a life where achievement means more than making it out of doors in time to catch the 8.20 bus or nabbing the last triple chocolate muffin in Greggs. In search of a life less ordinary I find myself spending quite a lot of time re-imagining the mundane. If I make a cake I can’t lick a spoon without smirking suggestively at an imaginary camera. I can’t go on a walk without striding out at a furious pace, woman pitting herself against the elements to conquer nature’s might, with family members bringing up the rear moaning about Mum ‘doing her Nanook of the North thing again’. Unsurprisingly there are many photographs of me striking attitudes at landmarks – arms outstretched in a Roman amphitheatre with myself as Maximus accepting the roars of approval from the mob, communing with the Otherworld at stone circles or staring intently out at rain-swept moors looking for Heathcliff. I wonder if most competitors at the Winter Olympics started off like me. They must have got into their chosen sport by many quality hours spent imagining themselves winning a gold medal. Not the snowboarders of course, who are all a bunch of laidback hippies nice enough to actively enjoy watching their competitors land a perfect 360 Triple Quad Spine Twangler regardless of what it means to their own placing. I mean those people who dedicate their lives to the dream of being the best in the world at launching themselves


into the air at furious speeds for improbable distances, revolving umpty times, landing safely on one foot on dangerously slippery surfaces and looking graceful all at once. But look at what those Olympians have to go through to achieve greatness. No-one could actually enjoy having to live in Nottingham, get up at 4.00am every day, consume 3 steaks garnished with 28 eggs for breakfast and slog around an ice rink getting shouted at by some hatchet-faced coach with the added frisson which comes from the distinct possibility of acquiring a smashed kneecap or coma induced concussion. It beggars belief that anyone could actually go through all that on a daily basis without the constant weight of an invisible shiny disc of metal hanging from their neck while they try to remember the words of their national anthem. Dealing with a humdrum existence is a genuine problem for t’ youth of today, many of whom spend their evenings traversing shiny new worlds and battling evil insectoids to win eternal glory against overwhelming odds and then find that normal life is a tiny bit flat in comparison. But maybe the answer does lie in the virtual world. It can’t be long until we’ll all be able to put our VR goggles on of a morning and spend our days balancing account sheets while playing a virtuoso violin performance at the Boston Symphony Hall, climbing Mount Everest and lunching with Brad Pitt. Until that day, if you need me, I’ll be rehearsing my Oscar acceptance speech in front of the bathroom mirror. Just in case.

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

Richard Sullivan established Swim2Swim to promote the importance of learning to swim and of being confident in and around water. Richard’s passion for swimming began at an early age and his skills and ability continued to develop through his youth and into adulthood competing at a high level both in swimming and water polo. There is no doubt that being able to swim is an important life skill, however being confident in the water has so many other benefits for all ages. As well as being a good full body workout, swimming is also good for overall well-being; it has been reported that swimming regularly can lower stress levels, reduce anxiety and depression, and improve your sleep patterns. Feeling the mental benefits of swimming takes just a light swim. Research has shown there are many other benefits of learning to swim at a young age, although swim2swim believe it is never too late to learn or to master or improve your technique.

Because of continued success and to meet demand, Swim2swim are in the process of building a purpose-built swimming pool in Little Tey. You can find more information on their website or feel free to give Richard or Karen a call and they will be happy to help. What Swim2Swim customers say: “Fantastic facilities and great swimming coaches, we’ve put all 3 of our boys into lessons and they’ve all come on leaps and bounds!” “His confidence and skills have all been thanks to the fab teachers he has had at his time with swim2swim” “Definitely would recommend Swim 2 Swim to any parent, even if your child isn’t keen which is how my son started all those years ago.”

Advertisement Feature


Sudoku Competition

How to play

Fill in the grid so that every row, every column, and every 3 x 3 box contains the digits 1 to 9, with no repetition! That’s all there is to it. You solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic - there’s no maths involved and no adding up.

WIN £25 Fill in and cut out and send to: Sarah Banks, The Connection, Applegarth, Whitestreet Green Boxford, Sudbury, Suffolk, CO10 5JL The first correct entry out of the hat will win the prize.

Closing date 25th May 2018


Pests cause Disease & Destruction

20 Years Experience


East Anglia's Premier Pest Control Company

For all your pest control problems

Call 24 hour

01206 213738 Head Office: 22 Windmill Court, London Road, Copford, Colchester, CO6 1LH


Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

Spot the Difference

There are ten differences - can you find them?

Answers on page 29

ROB BREW ER Tree Surgery Landscaping


Starting at 1 and finishing at 49, track your way from one square to another, either horizontally, vertically or diagonally, placing consecutive numbers into the empty squares as you go. Some numbers are already given.

Hedge trimming Fencing NPTC Qualified Fully Insured 01206 210209 07583 953576



LPPG Natural Gas and Oil Boilers Plu umbing - Taps, toilets and bathrooms Heeating - LPG, Natural Gas and Oil Safe registered Eleectrics - Lights, sockets and system checks LPPG Boilers - Repaired or replaced. Many with 7-10 year warranty

We offer a FREE BOILER SERVICE with every powerush of a central heating system. All work is fully guaranteed and inssured. No job is too big or small. Clean, tiidy and efficient. Friendly family business with 30 yeears experience.

07825 348 536 01787 278 511

Find us on

Call today for a free quote or book us in for that job that needs attention.

CoDeWorD Each letter in this puzzle is represented by a different number between 1 and 26. The codes for three letters are shown. Once you have filled these throughout the grid you can start guessing words and reveal other letters. As you find the letters enter them in the box below.


Answers on page 29

MDJ Landscapes Contract Grasscutting & Care, Hedging, Rotavating, Fencing, Turfing, Powerwashing, Weed control and all Grounds Maintenance

FREE ESTIMATES from Mark on 01787 220 396 07908 722 884 AR COOK PEST CONTROL Rats • Mice • Wasps • All small insects Bird and Rabbit proofing Fully insured • 25 years in pest control No VAT • No call out charge

Ask for Arthur

Fully qualified, certified & insured. No job too small - just give us a call!

Golden Acre, Rectory Road, Copford, Colchester, Essex, CO6 1DJ

T: 01206 211106 M: 07802 821537

Member of the National Pest Technician Association

Tel: 07545 125 376


• Landscaping • Construc�on %6F /DQGVFDSH *DUGHQ 'HVLJQ Based in Mount Bures, we work throughout Essex and Suffolk in all areas of hard and so� landscaping. Any size job welcome, call Mark for your free, personal quote.

Hedge and Tree Plan�ng Fencing and Gate Installa�on Brick Walls and Pa�os Tree Felling and Pruning Turf Laying and Decking 07742 696766

Property and Garden Maintenance Colchester Workhorse Paul Richardson


Brick & Block Work Rendering - Welding Punctures Mended Concreting - Fencing

3 Tonne mini-digger plus driver now available!

Tel: 01206 241530 Mob: 07889 805839


Gardening Grass Cutting Tree Topping Hedge Cutting Small Garden Walls Fish Ponds Sand & Ballast Deliveries HGV Tractor Driving






and another thing... tom receives a Proposal II by tom Hughes If you recall, Dear Reader, previously on And Another Thing, my old chum and workmate Nigel had been fatally struck by Cupid’s bow and had resolved, for reasons best known only to himself, to make an honest woman of Val, his long term squeeze. Yours truly was appointed best man and was duly tasked with organising the stag do. So, after rejecting Newcastle (too chilly), Amsterdam (too hazy) and New York (too far), Nigel, being a big fan of the Beatles, plumped for Liverpool. And so it came to pass that twelve middle-aged workmates alighted the train at Lime Street and, rucksacks in hand, trudged towards the Adelphi. We were standing in the lobby when Terry (marketing) unzipped his suitcase, pulled out an enormous flesh-coloured rubber suit and presented it to the groom. “Here Nige, the lads want you to wear this.” Nigel stared at the object for less than a second. “Terry, put that away and don’t be silly.” Now it was my turn. “Here everyone, put these on.” Twelve black t-shirts appeared - “WATCH OUT LADIES - IT’S NIGEL’S STAG!” A few of the guys pulled them on over their shirts, the material straining to cover their considerable girths. Colin, Nigel’s brother (clearly miffed because he wasn’t the best man), objected. “I can’t wear that - it won’t go with these chinos.” “Listen Colin, if you prefer, I can ring Val and see if you can go on the hen do?”


Then it was Brian’s (finance) turn to pipe up. Brian was bald, 5’ 3” and wider than he was tall. He squinted through round spectacles. “Tom, do I have to wear one? What if I get chatted up? I won’t be able to look Margaret in the eye.” Brian blinked as he pushed his mistcovered glasses back up his little nose. “Don’t worry Bri, if I see any strange women approaching you, I’ll be sure to let them know you’re completely off limits. Right, everyone follow me Liverpool here we come!” And so The Dirty Dozen hit Liverpool’s bars. As I was best man, it was only reasonable that I was in the chair for the first round. “OK, what are we having?” Colin was the first to pipe up. “Err, Tom, can I have a lime and soda?” “No. You can have a Guinness. Ken?” “I’ll have Guinness. And I’ll have Colin’s too if he doesn’t want it.” After a few ales, in order to line the stomach, we repaired to a pre-booked Chinese restaurant. After a gut-busting banquet, it was time to settle up. On the back of a napkin, Brian totted up one twelfth of the bill. “Right, that’s £31.50 each please.” Colin cleared his throat. “I don’t want to be picky, but I never had the soup, so technically…” Colin’s protestations came to an abrupt end when Big Larry (transport) shoved a banana fritter down the back of Colin’s shirt. As old friends were reacquainted

and new friendships made, the laughter grew louder and the hugs became more frequent. By six o’clock, spirits were high. By eight, the atmosphere was convivial. By ten, the conversations were distinctly lachrymose. Colin, a confirmed teetotaller, was crying into his umpteenth Guinness as he put his arm around my neck. ‘Yer know summat, Tim?” “Tom.” “You know summat Tom? Our Nige, well he, he, loves the very, the very, the very…” “Bones?” Colin stopped mid-stutter and shook his head. Unfortunately, whether it was my skeleton or something else that Nigel adored would forever be unknown, because it was at this point that Colin fell backwards into a potted plant and collapsed into a drunken stupor. Then it hit us - no one had seen the groom. After a frantic search Nigel was located sitting under a street lamp, toying forlornly with the hem of his t-shirt. Slowly, I eased myself down next to him. “What’s up, old chum?” “Tom, am I doing the right thing?” “Well, I don’t think this pavement is doing much for your piles.” “No, marrying Val. I mean, you love your Sarah, don’t you?” Oh goodness, now it was my turn to start the waterworks. But as for Nigel, well I began to wonder if his toes hadn’t begun to turn ever so slightly chilly...

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

Useful Numbers

Local Schools St. Peter’s C of E Primary School Tel: 01376 561328

An established Arborist and Tree Surgery Company based on the Essex/Suffolk borders FULLY INSURED AND N.P.T.C. QUALIFIED Tree Felling, Reductions, Pollarding, Thinning, Crown Cleaning and Hedge Trimming Tom has over 15 years experience working as a professional arborist. Please call Tom Veater regarding any enquiries or for a free quote

Tel: 07758 305742 or 01787 267986

Puzzle Solutions Codeword

Honywood Community Science School

Tel: 01206 710030

Tel: 01376 570411

Stanway Surgery

Feering C of E Controlled Primary School

Tel: 01206 572372

Tel: 01376 570296

Tel: 01787 222022

Tel: 01787 222205

Tel: 01787 227529

Colne Engaine C of E (Aided) Primary School Tel: 01787 222717 Bures C.E V.C Primary School Tel: 01787 227446 Chappel C of E School Tel: 01787 222296 St. John the Baptist C.E.V.A Primary School Tel: 01787 269300 Great Tey C.E Controlled Primary School Fordham All Saints C of E Primary School Tel: 01206 240251

St. Mary’s Lower School Tel: 01206 211242 Stanway Fiveways Primary School 1. Bees 2. Leaves 3. Cloud 4. Tanktop 5.Pattern 6. Moustache 7. Rabbit ear 8. Cup 9. Book colour 10. Worm

Spot the Difference

call: 01787 210701

The Pump House Surgery/Earls Colne

Earls Colne Primary School and Nursery

Tel: 01206 574819


Marks Tey Surgery Tollgate Health Centre

Stanway Primary School

Reach over 12,000 homes in over 20 villages

Tel: 01206 241137 Tel: 01206 213513

Tel: 01206 210439


West Bergholt Surgery

Kelvedon St. Mary C of E Primary School

Copford C of E Primary School

ADVERTISE HERE Established Local Trusted

Tel: 01376 561242

Tel: 01376 561231

Tel: 01206 210415


Coggeshall Surgery

Tel: 01206 574849 Holy Trinity C.E. Primary School Eight Ash Green & Aldham Tel: 01206 240880 Soaring High Montessori Coggeshall Tel: 01376 564392 Stoke by Nayland C.E. V.C.P School Tel: 01206 262418 Nayland Community Primary School Tel: 01206 262348

Doctors Kelvedon and Feering Health Centre

Bures Surgery Branch Surgery Tel: 01787 227529 Hardwick House Group Practice Tel: 01787 310000 Nayland Surgery Tel: 01206 262202

Village Halls Aldham Village Hall Tel: 01206 240682 Mount Bures Tel: 01787 228753 Bures Community Centre Tel: 01787 227278 Nayland Tel: 0774 895 3175 Stoke by Nayland Tel: 01206 262943 Wormingford Tel: 01787 228615 Feering Community Centre Tel: 01376 572467 Great Tey Village Hall Tel: 01206 210248 White Colne Village Hall Tel: 01787 221919 Colne Engaine Village Hall Tel: 01787 223668 Earls Colne Village Hall Tel: 01787 224370 Bures Community Centre Tel: 01787 227278 Eight Ash Green Village Hall Tel: 01206 540245 Copford Village Hall Tel: 01206 211235 Chappel and Wakes Colne Tel: 07771 622525

Tel: 01376 572906 Kelvedon Surgery Tel: 01376 574560


Index of Advertisers Business Coach Building Services Children's Nursery Dog Groomers Decorators Electrician Florist Flooring Garden Design Garden and Arburetum Garden Services Gift shop

4 31 2 13 11 27 7 31 27 21 27 7

Golf Club Home Improvements Hairdressers Holistic Therapy Homeopath Therapist Interior Designer Leaflet delivery Landscaping Optitians Oil Boiler Servicing Oven Cleaning Pest Control Property Maintenance

Pond Specialist Plumbing & Heating Restaurant Railway Museum Removals School Storage Swimming Lessons Swimming Pool Tree Surgeon Veterinary Surgery

5 31 9 9 9 7 30 27 32 24 11 24, 27 27

Willow Fences Wedding Venue Yoga



Stoke by Nayland



Riv er



Greenstead Green


Earls Colne

White Colne Wakes Colne Chappel

Great Tey



Fordham River


Stratford St Mary Dedham

Little Mount Horkesley Bures Wormingford Colne Engaine

5 5 7




27 11, 24, 26 5 14 11 2 11 23 5 25,29 13



West Bergholt Braiswick


Eight Ash Green




Lexden A12

Feering Kelvedon

��������� �� ���������� �� ���� ���� ���������� ���� �� ������� �� ���� ����

ADVERTISE HERE Established Local Trusted


Reach over 12,000 homes in over 20 villages E:

call: 01787 210701


Connection Magazine

We can deliver flyers and leaflets to 1000 - 12,000 homes and businesses in our distribution area. For more details call 01787 210701 or email:

Whilst every care has been taken to ensure that data in this publication is accurate, neither the publisher nor its editorial contributors can accept, and hereby disclaim any liability to any party to loss or damage caused by errors or omissions resulting from negligence, accident or any other cause. All adverts are published in good faith using information supplied by each company, on the understanding that relevant permissions for copy and images have been obtained. The Connection does not officially endorse any advertising material included within this publication. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in any retrieval systems or transmitted in any form - electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise - without the prior permission of the publisher



C J Wynn

Tree Services Professional tree work from a qualified and fully insured tree surgeon � All forms of pruning � � Tree and stump removal � � Hedge trimming, reductions and removal �

For a free quote or any enquiries please call Chris on 07704 572982 or 01787 223120

Renovation Loft Conversions Garden Rooms Bathroom Refits Driveways Fencing & Gates

Extensions Conservatory’s Kitchen Refurbs Windows Patios Fully Insured

For a Quote & Quality Service

01376 563055 07850 239373


When you buy any complete pair of glasses worth over ÂŁ125 Offer runs from 1st April to 30th June 2018. Cannot be used with any other offer. Terms and conditions apply.

50 Gainsborough Street Sudbury Suffolk CO10 2ET 01787 372492 28 High Street Halstead Essex CO9 2AP 01787 472209 32

Please mention The Connection when responding to adverts

April / May 2018  

This bright and breezy issue has lots in store for those of you who enjoy the outdoors. Several walking events are planned for the next two...

April / May 2018  

This bright and breezy issue has lots in store for those of you who enjoy the outdoors. Several walking events are planned for the next two...