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A now-10-year-old church in Denver ministers to (as contemplated by 1 Corinthians 4:11-13) the homeless, the reviled, and the persecuted and formally named itself after the actual words in verse 13, the “Scum of the Earth” Church. The congregation touts nonjudgmental Christianity; owns an elegant, aging building (but holds services elsewhere because of fire code violations); and is a rough mix of anarchists, punk rockers, environmentalists and disaffected teens perhaps mainly keen on angering their parents. “Scum” (as church members matter-of-factly call themselves) tilt mildly philosophically conservative (though not nearly evangelical), connected only by the common belief that “God is love,” according to a December report in Denver’s Westword.

Great Art!

• Among the recent works funded by Arts Council England was a “painting” consisting of a blank canvas, for which artist Agnieszka Kurant was paid the equivalent of about $2,300 and on which she intends to paint something in the future. Rounding out her exhibition were a “sculpture” that was not really present and a “movie” that had been shot with no film in the camera. • In October, borrowing from the U.S. Air Guitar Championship (which honors self-made guitar “heroes” playing wild rock ‘n’ roll as if they were holding real guitars), the second annual Air Sex Championship was held in the Music Hall in Brooklyn, N.Y., and eventually won by Lady C. (whose performance could

not easily be described). Each contestant (solo only) had two minutes to cover “all the bases”: “meeting, seduction, foreplay, intercourse, and, if successful, afterglow,” and exposing body parts was not allowed.

Police Report

If You’re Not Safe in Your Own Home ...: (1) At 2 a.m. on Nov. 13 in Akron, Ohio, a 70-year-old woman was the victim of a home invasion when Cory Buckley, 22, broke in and robbed her. AcFine Points of the Law cording to the police report, the woman • Questionable Judgments: (1) The was seated on the commode at the time, New Jersey Government Record Council and Buckley was dressed in a clown mask. ruled in December that the town of (2) Melissa Wagaman, 33, was convicted Somerset had overcharged Tom Coulter in November in Hagerstown, Md., in 2008 by $4.04 on the $5 it collected for of a February home invasion in a compact disc of a council meeting which she broke into her neighand must issue a refund. The town bor’s house while wearing only estimates that it spent about $17,000 New Year, a bridal skirt and veil. She later fighting Coulter’s appeals (and payNew City blamed cold medicine and ing his attorney’s fees). (2) Brandi Manager marijuana. Jo Winkelman, 17, was charged in September in Juneau, Wis., Oops! with violating the state’s child • Among the Major abuse law after a schoolyard fight League Baseball players (averand risks a maximum of six years in age salary: about $3.3 million) prison. Authorities charged Winkelwho spent time on the disabled man even though her “victim” was a list in 2010: Kendry Morales classmate older than Winkelman. (Angels), who broke his leg jump• Police in Hyderabad, Pakistan, ing on home plate after hitting recently arrested a doctor for the a home run; Brian Roberts increasingly suspect crime of insult(Orioles), who was out a week with a ing Islam - after he merely tossed away concussion when he smacked himself in the business card of a man who happened the head with his bat after striking out; to have the last name “Muhammad.” Chris Coghlan (Marlins), who needed According to a December Associated knee surgery after giving a teammate a Press dispatch, “dozens” of Pakistanis are playful post-game shaving-cream pie; and sentenced to death each year for such Geoff Blum (Astros), who needed elbow tangential references to the holy name of surgery after straining his arm putting on Muhammad, but the government fears his shirt. that trying to repeal the law might incite Muslim extremism. Least Competent Criminals Fortunately for Police, Disguising His E-Mail Address Did Not Occur to

Him: Kyle D. Gore, 23, of Naperville, Ill., was arrested in December for allegedly downloading child pornography on his computer. Police identified Gore as the man trying to find people online who could help him have encounters with children, using the address “kdg31087@ aol.com” (an unimaginative identifier for someone of Gore’s initials and born, as Gore was, in 1987).

Recurring Theme

Anatomically Equipped Shoplifters: Ailene Brown, 28, and Shmeco Thomas, 37, were arrested in Edmond, Okla., in November and charged with shoplifting at a TJ Maxx store. Surveillance video revealed that, among the items stuffed in the pair’s belly fat and under their armpits and breasts were four pairs of boots, three pairs of jeans, a wallet and gloves.

Medicare In Action

The federal agency that administers Medicare acknowledged to the South Florida Sun-Sentinel in November that the government often overpays for patient wheelchairs due to a quirk in its rules. Ordinary wheelchairs sell for $100 to $350, but Medicare cannot reimburse patients who buy the chairs; it can only pay for rentals (for up to 13 months), for $40 to $135 a month. (A 2009 audit found that Medicare allowed up to $7,215 for oxygen dispensers that were available for sale for $587 and $4,018 for a power wheelchair that cost suppliers $1,048.) CS By chuck shepherd UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE

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15 JAN 12 - JAN 18, 2011 | WWW.CONNECTSAVANNAH.COM

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Jan. 12, 2011 Connect Savannah Issue  

Featuring Savannah metal band Kylesa; remembering Spitfire Poetry Group founder Clinton Powell; Live Oak Public Libraries annual gala; versa...

Jan. 12, 2011 Connect Savannah Issue  

Featuring Savannah metal band Kylesa; remembering Spitfire Poetry Group founder Clinton Powell; Live Oak Public Libraries annual gala; versa...

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