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VOL. 44 ISSUE 46 • May 14 - 20, 2014 • clevescene.com


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Dedicated to: Free Times founder Richard H. Siegel (1935-1993) and Scene founder Richard Kabat Publisher Chris Keating Editorial Editor Vince Grzegorek Music Editor Jeff Niesel Staff Writers Sam Allard, Doug Brown, Eric Sandy Web Editor Alaina McConnell Contributing Writer Will Burge Dining Editor Douglas Trattner Contributing Dining Editor Beth Phillips, Jason Beudert Stage Editor Christine Howey Interns Patrick Stoops, Liz Trenholme, Eric Gonzalez Creative Services Production Manager Steve Miluch Layout Editor/Graphic Designer Alise Belcher Staff Photographer Emanuel Wallace Advertising Advertising Director Jennifer Woomer Retail Sales Director Shayne Rose Sr. Multimedia Account Executives John Crobar Multimedia Account Executives Amanda Klein, Brendan McHugh, Dan Mullin, Shannon McNally Classified Classified Account Executive Alice Leslie Marketing Director of Marketing & Public Relations Bob Rotatori Director of Events Jenna Conforti Director of Business Development Madeline Bleiweiss Business Business Manager Brian Painley Asst. To The Publisher Angela Lott Sales Assistant/Receptionist Megan Stimac Circulation Director Don Kriss Cleveland Scene Magazine is published every week by Euclid Media Group. National Advertising Voice Media Group www.voicemediagroup.com Verified Audit Member Cleveland distribution Scene is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Copyright The entire contents of Cleveland Scene Magazine are copyright 2014 by Euclid Media Group. No portion may be reproduced in whole or in part by any means, including electronic retrieval systems without the express written permission of the publisher.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Cleveland Scene Magazine Street Address 1468 W. Ninth St. Suite 805, Cleveland, OH 44113 General Information: 216-241-7550 Retail & Classified Fax: 216-241-6275 Editoral Fax: 216-802-7212 E-mail: scene@clevescene.com

May 14 – 20, 2014 | VoluMe 44 | No.46

CONTENTS 21

upfront | 7

All Johnny all the time, plus Kevin O’Brien’s unfiltered hate speech

Facetime | 11

Flower power with the guys behind Urban Orchid

News | 13

After a botched execution in Oklahoma, Ohio’s death penalty comes under increased focus

Feature | 14

The West Side Market is rooted in tradition — and that’s part of the problem. Five big changes to look for soon

Get out! | 21

The only event calendar you need to stay happy this week

Stage | 28

The post-juvenile delinquents are back in Jersey Boys

Movies | 31

Million Dollar Arm scores nicely

eat | 33

Sweet Melissa’s, local kraut, plus more

Music | 40

Alice in Chains carries on with a replacement singer, the Cleveland Orchestra takes up residency in Lakewood, plus all the concerts to see this week

Savage love | 62

@cleveland_scene facebook.com/clevelandscene

Hook up, shook up

Take

SCENE with you with our iPad app! “Cleveland Scene Magazine”

Cover illustration by Alise Belcher

Attention veterans!

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Join our next Academic Refresher session starting May 27, or ask about our Individual Study Plan! Call 216-987-4938 to get started or visit www.tri-c.edu/VUB.

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upfront

news

something johnny this WAy Comes

tHIS WEEK

Kevin O’Brien’s Hate speecH GOes Unfiltered, aGain Fear not, gentle readers. Kevin O’Brien, the Plain Dealer’s dauntless right-wing deputy editorial page editor and resident nutjob, is “standing by” his statement that illegal immigrants are driven by nothing but a “mercenary interest.” He is wholeheartedly committed to the stance he advanced in a morally outrageous column on April 8 entitled “Illegal immigrants don’t want to be Americans; they want money.” Scene received a concerned letter from the League of United Latin American Citizens saying their organization had reached out to the PD and O’Brien personally. They wanted to meet, they said, and provide some informed perspective for O’Brien and his jingoistic rantings. “Our objections...have less to do with Mr. O’Brien’s First Amendment rights to express his opinion,” Hugu Urizar, president of LULAC’s Cleveland chapter, wrote the PD, “and more to do with your decision to

REMEMBER RANDy?

Less than two years after selling the Browns, Randy Lerner puts Aston Villa up for sale. Haslam reportedly interested once he figures out the proper dollars-to-pounds rebate math.

WHERE’S BERES?

When even the local artisanal juice place is talking Johnny, you know it’s a problem. (Photo by Vince Grzegorek)

publish it.” LULAC believes that O’Brien’s unfounded views, with not a single citation or expert source, reflect badly on the journalistic integrity of the paper and “fuel the fires of intolerance” in Northeast Ohio. “Would you publish an Op-Ed by L.A. Clippers owner Donald Sterling that explained why African Americans are inferior to others,” inquired Richard Herman, Civil Rights Director for LULAC Ohio, “simply because he believed in this viewpoint?” LULAC provided a bulleted list with some of O’Brien’s more

WKYC cancels Tom Beres’ Sunday Cleveland politics show “Between the Lines” after 11 years, due to low ratings. If only the county subsidized his show...

WOBSER HAS LEFT THE ICE CREAM SHOP

After cutting ribbon at the Ohio City Mitchell’s grand opening on Saturday, Ohio City Inc.’s Eric Wobser accepts city manager position in Sandusky. Says he secretly prefers Cedar Point’s Dippin’ Dots.

objectionable assertions. (We’ve got a much longer, more comprehensive list). Among them: “Citizenship is the very last thing on [immigrants’] minds. Money is first”; “...Contrast that with the vast majority of ‘immigrants,’ who arrive illegally and with no interest whatsoever in contributing to a better, stronger America”; “In no way does the scant benefit of cheap labor begin to offset the damage that is being done to American law and culture.” O’Brien penned another editorial on April 22, in response to a private letter he received from “a very earnest fellow” — not LULAC — who took

yOUR QUALITy OF LIFE

You were surprised President Garfield’s monument was broken into, but you were mainly surprised to find out President Garfield was buried in Cleveland to begin with.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

73. ThaT’s The number of headlines on Cleveland.com since May 8 that mention Johnny Manziel. If you wondered just how crazy Manziel-mania will get in Cleveland this summer and fall, just think about that fact and then throw your computer out the window and go for a nice walk or something. Because otherwise you will be subjected to clickbait at its worst, as evidenced by some of our favorite articles penned by the journalists over at the Northeast Ohio Media Group in just the 24 short hours after the Browns drafted the Heisman-winning quarterback. “5 events Johnny Manziel will love in Cleveland.” “House Hunters: Where should Johnny Manziel live in Cleveland?” “Don’t be fooled by impostor Johnny Manziel Twitter accounts.” “Johnny Manziel would face big tax hit if he becomes a Cleveland resident.” They go on from there, but they weren’t even the worst thing in Cleveland media in recent memory. Which brings us to...

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upfront

8

Open-Carry advOCates Get testy in Medina With the right permit you can openly carry a gun in the state of Ohio. WE GET IT. That should be the end of the discussion, which often leans heavily in favor of gun rights. OK. But some

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

exception to his piece. O’Brien, again, provided no official sources for his claims and reiterated that he had no beef with legal immigrants: “Meeting legal immigrants and refugees wouldn’t change my mind, because I have no quarrel with them,” O’Brien insisted. “Meeting illegal immigrants wouldn’t, either, because it doesn’t matter whether they’re nice people or had good personal reasons for coming here. They are in the wrong, no matter their personal reasons.” The NEOMG’s Chris Quinn, Andrea Hogben and Elizabeth Sullivan sat down with LULAC and representatives from Latino media last week. According to Herman, Chris Quinn had assumed the meeting would be off-the-record. The NEOMG continued to claim that their editorials (O’Brien’s in particular, we assume) are “just one person’s opinion.” Herman contends that the “just one person” argument doesn’t hold water when you’re creating the dialogue in the region at the daily newspaper. He told Scene that O’Brien’s op-eds are symptomatic of a much larger problem about the way Cleveland talks about immigration. Herman says LULAC requested an official apology from O’Brien, a retraction, and the appointment of a Latino in a leadership position at the Plain Dealer, but he’s not counting on a response.

45

news pro-gun “advocates” thought to drive the point home last week in fairly suburban Medina, where they posted up in historic Public Square to talk policy and flaunt AR rifles and other firearms. And, yeah, they were on fine legal ground, as it happens, but the problems began when people dialed 9-1-1 in rapid succession - 10 times during the May 5 afternoon event alone. People were calling 9-1-1 because there were other people walking around historic Public Square with AR rifles. The visual is unsettling; the implications are harrowing. None of that has anything to do with Ohio’s open carry laws. Medina police have caught flack for approaching these guys and asking for ID and generally trying to ascertain what in the world was going on. We’re certainly no police apologists here at Scene, but, wow, if there are guys strolling around Cleveland with firearms en masse, we would like to think an upstanding officer or two would touch base with them ever so briefly (hold the 137 bullets). The broader problem with this whole thing is that literally no one is saying these people can’t own or carry their guns. In the realm of public demonstration, this is useless — and the ripple effect of armed civilians congregating and warding off police presence makes for a very alarming way of life in otherwise quiet Medina. Police Chief Pat Berarducci sounds weary when he addresses the concerns of this crowd and says that once an officer confirms all the right permits are in place, “We don’t care what you do.” Pretty simple, really. The pushback from open-carriers comes from a perception that officers are treading on their rights by

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requesting ID. Sure, if a person is walking down the street and doing nothing more than humming the latest Beyonce song, then of course there’s no legal basis for an officer to get all up in their grill. But the plain-view sight of a firearm prompts officers to request state ID and papers - just to make sure and maybe even celebrate that such a person is following the law. It can be fun! It’s not a “reasonable suspicion” issue; it’s the simple fact that a machine created solely for the purpose of killing things is being introduced into a public setting. Which is fine, per Ohio law, as long as a diminishing list of requirements is met. Police are the people that society grants the ability to check out those reqs, however illbegotten their methods most of the time. “We take no issue with an officer responding, requesting ID or having a consensual encounter,” members of Northeast Ohio Carry say via a public statement. “We only take issue with the fact that the chief thinks that merely exercising a constitutionally protected right and carrying a firearm openly gives him reasonable articulable suspicion to force detainment and force ID. It does not.” How articulable.

COurt denies tJ Lane’s appeaL Monday, the 11th District Court of Appeals denied Chardon shooter TJ Lane’s appeal that his life sentence — three consecutive life sentences, actually, without parole — was unconstitutional because Lane was 17 at the time of the shooting. Lane, now 19, shot and killed three students, paralyzed another and injured two more in his spree in

Fine assessed against Shane French (“Rover”) after he pleaded guilty to those July 4, 2013, fireworks-related misdemeanors.

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Expected cost of revamped MetroHealth campus, announced Friday morning by CEO Akram Boutros, whose name not even Mayor Frank Jackson can properly pronounce.

“...IT DOESN’T MATTER WHETHER THEy’RE NICE PEOPLE OR HAD GOOD PERSONAL REASONS FOR COMING HERE. THEy ARE IN THE WRONG, NO MATTER THEIR PERSONAL REASONS.” — KEvIN O’BRIEN

February 2012. Judge Cynthia Westcott Rice was unmoved by arguments on Lane’s behalf: “Appellant did not act on impulse, on provocation, or under pressure from peers or adults,” the ruling read. “To the contrary, he planned this attack weeks in advance before he went to school that day with a loaded gun. He shot three young students to death. He shot another student several times, confining him to a wheelchair and subjecting him to a life of pain and disability. Appellant also brought indescribable pain, grief, and lifelong tragedy to the victims’ families.” The ruling also reveals how Lane manipulated medical staff into thinking he was depressed, suicidal, sexually abused and schizophrenic. A doctor from the psycho-diagnostic clinic concluded that Lane “fabricated these symptoms in order to evade prosecution.” Lane’s behavior at his sentencing in March, 2013 was also referenced in the ruling. He wore a T-shirt with “KILLER” written in black marker across the chest, much like the one he wore the day of the shooting. He also delivered an obscene statement to the families of those he killed. Lane will spend the rest of his life

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene

225

Number of vanity license plates the Ohio BMV rejected from June 2013 to April 2014. List includes SHARTED, FAPTRON and THE COCK.


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Facetime flower power The guys at Urban Orchid who helped Hingetown bloom

By Sam Allard Brandon Sitler and Jeff Zelmer, the owners and operators of Urban Orchid in Hingetown, have been arranging floral bouquets like woah during the week leading up to Mother’s Day. It’s the busiest holiday of the year for this chic flower shop on the near west side, where Sitler and Zelmer have been basically the only game in town since they opened here in August, 2012. Scene stopped by on Mother’s Day to see some of the gorgeous bouquets and to talk about their business, about Hingetown, and about the way people in Cleveland buy flowers. We managed to squeeze in a conversation while people streamed in to pick up roses and peonies for lucky mothers across the city.

Seems like you’re pretty busy. Brandon Sitler: Yeah, business has been great. Mother’s Day is the busiest holiday for us. Bigger than Valentine’s day? BS: Valentine’s Day would be our second-biggest. And then probably Christmas. Then maybe Easter, I guess? Most of our work is wedding work. We did four weddings this week in addition to all our Mother’s Day orders.

Before you guys showed up, i didn’t know where to get flowers around here, in a pinch. BS: There’s the West Side Market, which has three vendors who sell flowers there. is there a famous or especially popular local bloom? BS: For the Cleveland area? No. Not really. Ohio used to be the carnation capital.

So all these have been preordered? (Gestures to bouquets). BS: Yeah, we’re more of a highend specialty boutique. You can’t come in and just pick a mother’s day arrangement. We create every arrangement based on what you’re looking for: your mom’s colors that she loves, a certain design style. We specialize in cotntemporary arrangements, but we do all different styles. Europeans garden style, rustic, wildflower. Anything really. do people actually have specific ideas when they come in? or is it more they just name a price and you cook something up? BS: With the guys yeah. Guys are like, ‘Can you please make something for me for $30 in five minutes?’ Girls are like ‘My mom only likes fuchsia peonies and light pink this or that.” i assume the Hingetown development has been pretty exciting for you guys. JZ: We’ve gotten a lot more walkin traffic since the neighborhood started to develop. There are a lot of people who come in now and might just buy a bouquet to put in their house, or a greeting card or one of the gift items that we have. But when they do that, then they become aware of us and are much more likely to come back to us if they’re planning a baby shower or bridal shower or

Considerably nicer than the flowers we got our moms. (Courtesy of Brandon Sitler)

birthday party or something.

i heard somewhere that a ton of flowers sold in the U.S. are grown in Colombia. BS: Well yeah. A lot of our flowers here come from California though. A lot of roses come from Colombia, but like snapdragons and peonies and hydrangeas: They’re all coming from California. JZ: What happens is growers sell to distributors who in turn distribute to wholesalers that are located throughout the country. And we buy from wholesalers. We also buy direct from some growers. BS: We really try to keep it as local as possible, but it’s really hard in Ohio. And a lot of the stuff is greenhouse grown, so it’s easier to cultivate. Our snowdrops are locally grown. Our acacias are locally grown. All of our orchid plants are from an orchid wholesaler in the region. any advice for when people should buy flowers? JZ: They should get them weekly! We actually do have customers who buy flowers weekly, just for themselves. They just like the idea of seeing fresh-cut flower arrangements in their house. We have a lot of customers who buy the typical birthday, anniversary, thank you. Lawyers get a lot of flowers, which surprises me. BS: They make people money. We also do a lot of flower work for celebrities when they come into town. We did flowers for Scarlett Johannson, all the people that were in The Avengers, Kristin Heigel, Tom Cruise’s ex-wife.

JZ: That nerdy chick from the Big Bang Theory. BS: Mayim Bialik. That woman that was what’s-her-name’s daughter, from the Gilmore Girls? Rory Gilmore… Alexis Bledel.

How do they hear about you? BZ: I think a lot of it’s through Yelp. But we’re really active on social media. I Instagram pictures of flower arrangements regularly. I’m on Facebook. I’m on Twitter. We really don’t do any paid advertising. It’s all mainly grassroots and word of mouth. do either of you have a favorite flower? JZ: Mine would be an orchid. BS: I’d probably say an oncidium orchid would be my favorite. no way i can spell that. BS: O-n-c-i-d-i-u-m. The stem’s really long. It has little yellow orchids all the way up the stem. It’s very bright and happy, and it’s what our logo is designed after. i love the logo, love the sign. You were one of the first businesses in Hingetown, right? JZ: Yeah, we were in a smaller location on Bridge and we needed more space. Our only concern was that we’d have less foot traffic as we were moving from Bridge and West 25th, but honestly, now, I’d say we have just as much if not more, just because of everything that’s popped up around here.

sallard@clevescene.com t @scenesallard

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

and a funeral? BS: No funeral, but everyone keeps asking us. Four weddings...and we missed out on the funeral. It was almost my funeral.

Jeff Zelmer: Alliance, Ohio. BS: But I don’t think there’s many farms left that actually grow carnations. But our local wholesaler, he grows all our orchids for us. They’re so beautiful. We’re known for orchids, it’s in our name, so we use a lot of orchids in our arrangements. Our most popular is what, probably hydrangeas? JZ: I’d say hydrangeas and peonies are the most popular for Mother’s Day.

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news On the capital Offense State task force released 56 recommendations for Ohio Death Penalty application By Sam Allard

Court -- under the watchful eye of Chief Justice Maureen O’Connor -- has been meeting since 2011. Last month, they released the fruits of their labors in the form of 56 recommendations for Kasich and the state. Those recommendations have received objections from prosecutors -- including Cuyahoga County Prosecutor Timothy McGinty -- who argue that the recommendations are so stringent that they effectively ban the use of the death penalty. “Defense attorneys and anti-death penalty advocates have hijacked this task force and are attempting to abolish capital punishment by committee since their efforts to do so in the legislature have failed,” McGinty told the NEOMG last month. The Ohioans to Stop Executions, a statewide grassroots advocacy group based in Cincinnati, counters that recommendations like these are necessary to prevent racial and geographic bias in death penalty sentencing. At the time of the 2007 ABA assessment, defendants whose victims were white were nearly four times more likely to receive a death sentence than those whose victims were black. “Also, it’s things like, you know, labs that handle DNA evidence should be accredited,” said Alison Smith, OTSE’s Communications Director. “Not relying on unrecorded jailhouse testimony, not executing death row inmates who are mentally ill.” Smith said that the application of the death penalty is often largely dependent on the County Prosecutor. She said that McGinty has been “extremely prudent” in Ohio, where in 2013 only four death sentences were handed down. At issue too, for the OTSE folks, are the protocol changes with respect to drugs used for lethal injection. In

Death by hanging would be more humane than recent lethal injection debacles. (Photo by Frank Camhi)

December, 2009, Ohio became the first state to use a single-drug method for lethal injections (sodium thiopental). Then in March, 2011, Ohio became the first state to use pentobarbital in a single-drug method. In January of this year, after the supply of pentobarbital was in jeopardy because of international reluctance to ship the drug for the purposes of capital punishment, Ohio became the first state to use an untested two-drug cocktail featuring midazolam and hydromorphone. That method was used on Dennis McGuire, in what one witness called a “ghastly” and “horrendous” event. McGuire took more than 20 minutes to die, and made choking and snorting noises throughout. Though the state Department of Rehabilitation and Correction concluded, somehow, that McGuire did not suffer any pain, they nevertheless will significantly increase the dosage for the next execution (50 mg of midazolam, up from 10 mg, and 50 mg of hydromorphone, up from 40 mg). “If it went so perfectly, why do they need to change the dosage?” asks OTSE’s Alison Smith. She told Scene that the ongoing protocol changes should be reason enough to seriously review capital punishment procedures. She said Ohio has changed lethal injection protocol seven times over the course of the past four years. Though OTSE’s ultimate goal, obviously, is the abolition of the death penalty, they feel that a positive first step is mindful application. John Oliver observed on his new HBO television program “Last Week

Tonight” that the United States, along with Iran, Iraq, Saudi Arabia and China, is responsible for 82 percent of the world’s executions. “Any list that includes Iran, Iraq, Saudi Arabia and China” is not a list you want to be on.

FACTS States to recently abolish death penalty: Maryland (2013), Connecticut (2012), Illinois (2011), New Mexico (2009). New York (2007), New Jersey (2007). A total of 18 states, plus the District of Columbia, have abolished Capital Punishment. Michigan was the first, in 1846. As of April 29, the United States had executed 20 people in 2014, all by lethal injection and all taking place in five states: Texas (7), Florida (5), Missouri (4), Oklahoma (3), and Ohio (1). of the 20 people executed this year (19 men, 1 woman), not one had been on death row for less than 10 years. 4%: Estimated number of death row inmates who are innocent. 137: Number of people currently on death row in Ohio. 53: People executed by the state of Ohio since 1999. 6: Number of former inmates on Ohio Death Row who have been exonerated since 1973. 142: Total number of former Death Row inmates who have been exonerated since 1973.

sallard@clevescene.com t @scenesallard

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

The boTched execuTion of Clayton Lockett in Oklahoma late last month was sufficiently horrific to inspire the pro-death-penalty Obama administration to do some long overdue soul searching. “Deeply troubling,” was how Obama characterized the Oklahoma fiasco, which went like this: Medical staff failed to locate a suitable artery on Lockett’s body and elected to insert a catheter into his groin. The catheter missed its target, and over the course of 43 minutes, Lockett moaned and writhed in agony, repeatedly struggling against his restraints and trying to speak as the drugs seeped into his soft tissue. The warden ultimately aborted the execution, but Lockett died of a heart attack shortly thereafter. In the aftermath, state and Federal officials have sort of been looking at their shoes and acknowledging that the death penalty has been a disaster for quite some time. Among other things, the availability and efficacy of the drugs used has resulted in repeated changes in protocol. Prosecutors have withheld important evidence that result in capital indictments for innocent men. An astonishing four percent of death row inmates are exonerated. Obama has tasked Eric Holder and the Justice Department to review the administration of capital punishment. He said it’s about time we start asking ourselves some “difficult and profound questions.” In Ohio, those questions have been simmering in very specific ways since 2007, when the American Bar Association determined that in 93 percent of cases, the state failed to meet standard guidelines for fairness and accuracy in the administration of capital punishment. As a result, a special task force of the Ohio Supreme

13


feature Cutline. (Photograph by Emanuel Wallace)

the next century The West Side Market is rooted in tradition — and that’s part of the problem. Five big changes lie ahead for this Cleveland institution By Lee Chilcote


minus a couple new specialty shops and those who choose to sell organic produce, local produce, and farmraised meats. The problem is the latter are few and far between, with many vendors selling absolute garbage that might have fallen off the truck. I say it is time the market cleans up before it goes the way of the dinosaur.” Eric Wobser, current executive

in August, shot down the plan in rather dramatic, public fashion. “We’ve lasted 100 years without their intervention,” Vince Bertonaschi, an old-school butcher who’s been a market veteran for decades, told the Plain Dealer. “They’re not interested in helping us last the way we are. We are the West Side Market that won the awards because we’re still an old-

“WE’RE WORkING OuT RATES AND HOW IT WILL BE MANAGED, BuT THERE HAS TO BE SOME MECHANISM TO TuRN OVER PARkING. I THINk YOu’LL SEE A LOT OF CHANGES OVER THE NExT 12 TO 24 MONTHS THAT ARE FORWARD THINkING.” — ERIC WOBSER

director of Ohio City Incorporated (OCI), a nonprofit group whose mission is to guide the area’s redevelopment, who just announced he’s taken a job as Sandusky’s city manager and will begin his new position as soon as next month, agrees changes are needed. “I’m always worried about the market’s long-term future,” he admits. “I think the vendors realize they can take advantage of being an iconic, historic place, hold onto what’s great about the past without being beholden to it, and transition to a successful future.” Embracing change may be what helps the West Side Market enjoy another successful 100 years. Here are five changes to look out for in Cleveland’s beloved public market.

Fixing the parking crunch City officials are working on a plan to consolidate and redevelop the West Side Market lots and probably charge for parking. Details of the plan could be announced this year. The parking problem at the market is not new. There are two lots here, the main lot and the Hick’s lot, both of them free. The city, which owns the market, proposed a plan to install ticket booths and charge a modest fee of two dollars per hour a few years ago. Spaces would turn over more quickly, and shoppers could park 90 minutes for free. Yet the idea didn’t go over so well. The vendors’ association, which has a lease on the parking lot that expires

fashioned market. If you want to turn this into a concession stand, then tell us, and maybe we should pack up and go home.” Bertonaschi, known as a bulldog who helped get the city’s attention, was afraid charging for parking would keep customers away. Yet under the current system, visitors who grab a pint of beer on West 25th can park all day for free – without buying so much as a smokie. So it would seem that having free parking isn’t helping vendors much, either. Bertonaschi is no longer president of the vendors’ association. While the new president, Tommy Boutros, also doesn’t support charging for parking, he’s less adversarial and sees the writing on the wall. “No one wants to pay, but it’s not up to us,” he says. Other market vendors that Scene spoke with say paid parking is a fine idea. “We’ve been fighting for traditions that aren’t necessarily good traditions,” says Bob Holcepl, owner of City Roast. “I think it would be okay to charge people something for parking.” City officials are now moving ahead on a plan to consolidate the two parking lots and close part of West 24th Street to improve the traffic flow. This project would create at least 150 additional parking spaces, possibly more. The city secured $500,000 from the Ohio EPA for green infrastructure and has committed $1.2 million from its own budget. The total cost is about $2.9 million, and officials are now looking for other sources of money. As of now, city officials remain mum on whether they’ll charge for

parking. Wobser also says nothing’s finalized, but hints at changes ahead: “We’re working out rates and how it will be managed, but there has to be some mechanism to turn over parking. I think you’ll see a lot of changes over the next 12 to 24 months that are forward thinking.” Local beer entrepreneur Sam McNulty, who owns Market Garden Brewery and other venues on the street, says charging for parking is a no-brainer. If the parking costs something, then spaces are more likely to turn over – thus resulting in thousands more visitors. “Then we won’t have a parking problem; we’ll have a problem with people trying to get into the market. The bottleneck will be the people trying to get in,” he says. “I haven’t heard talk of an addition to the market yet, but who knows what the future holds.” In the long term, both vendors and OCI agree that the solution to Ohio City’s parking woes is encouraging more people to walk or ride their bikes, as well as a structured parking garage. There are no plans for a garage now, but Wobser says it will likely happen eventually, possibly as part of a mixed-use development along West 25th.

Marked Market iMproveMents The city, which has spent more than $3 million on the market since the centennial, is also moving forward on additional improvements. This year, the city spent $1.5 million to install a new grease trap and do other plumbing work, make roof

Tommy Boutros, president of the vendors’ association. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

It’s a beautIful, crIsp sprIng day at the West Side Market. The sun is shining, the leaves are budding on the trees and everyone’s happy. Except those two guys fighting over parking, leaning out the windows of their cars and spewing vitriol at each other. “Asshole!,” a middle-aged guy in a minivan yells at a pickup-truck driver who cut him off. Welcome to Saturday morning at Cleveland’s venerable, 102-yearold public market, where parking problems are so pronounced, grown men are having fits of road rage. The market has always been busy on Saturdays. Yet recently, thanks to the popularity of this institution and businesses on West 25th Street, the neighborhood has a parking crunch like, um, a real city. It’s not uncommon to see cars circling the lot in an endless shuffle, then returning to the street to look for a spot somewhere else. Or, one would surmise, they head back to the freeway and hop on back to wherever they came from. In short, the market’s success has become its problem. Yet addressing the challenges has proved to be elusive so far. The market’s greatest strength – its history as a local institution, part of our shared heritage as Clevelanders – also makes it a place that’s stubbornly slow to embrace change. And while no one wants it to become a cheesy tourist trap selling T-shirts and tchotchkes, no one wants it to be irrelevant, either. “Why change?” some would argue. The market is fine. It attracts a million visitors a year and vendors say sales are still rising in the wake of the centennial. That sentiment overlooks the fact that there are plenty of challenges here, as well. Beyond the parking problem, which vendors say is No. 1, the buildings have a backlog of repairs. And then there are the shoppers who bitch about rotten produce, and plenty of others who say the hours are inconvenient. Others ask: Why aren’t there more local foods? That last frustration came to a head recently in a blog post entitled “Cleveland West Side Market: The Dinosaur in the Room” that was shared a gazillion times on Facebook. “Yes, the market is a great place for cheap produce and affordable meat options,” wrote Jason Burchaski on 52 Weeks of Cleveland. “However, the market is stuck in a time warp,

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

feature

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repairs and upgrade the restrooms. Vendors are pleased, since plumbing has been an issue for a long time. The city also installed new LED lighting throughout the market hall, which, coupled with the cleaning that took place after last year’s fire, has given the place a bright new shine. “Some of these improvements are not visible to everyday customers, but they really impact vendors and day-to-day operations,” says Amanda Dempsey, manager of markets for the City of Cleveland. “Other improvements, like the renovation of the public restrooms and the new LED lighting, have made a very noticeable difference.” Things weren’t always so peachy keen. Ward 3 Councilman Joe Cimperman told Scene two years ago that the market had been poorly managed (he did not return a phone call seeking comment for this article). “For years, the mayor’s office and council simply ignored the needs of the vendors, and their attitude was, ‘You can do what you want,’” he said at the time. “The city is not doing a good enough job. We need to do better.” The city’s relationship with vendors has improved. “They’ve been extremely responsive to us this year,” says Emma Beno, co-owner of the Pork Chop Shop and secretary of the association. “When they closed the market for a few days to put in a huge grease trap, no one even

complained about it. They said, ‘All right, that’s cool.’” These improvements are essential, but it’s clear that there’s plenty more work to be done. A 2011 report issued by OCI in advance of the centennial identified about $7 million in needed upgrades. Right now, the city is working through high priority repairs. Additional work, such as renovating an unused area on the second level into a demonstration or test kitchen, is still part of a longer-term vision. “There’s not an active capital campaign for the market right now, but there is one in development,” says Wobser, who expects the city to release a long-term plan for implementing “catalytic improvements” to the market sometime later this year.

A new sheriff in town Another noticeable change at the market is who’s running it. Dempsey, the 34-year-old manager, previously worked for OCI. She helped organize the centennial and authored the 2011 report outlining changes needed to ensure the market’s success. She’s earned a reputation as a straight shooter, someone the vendors know that they can work with. So far, Dempsey seems to have earned the trust of both vendors and business owners. Beno describes her as a manager that is “helpful” and follows through on commitments. “She’s a force to be reckoned with, in a very positive way,” adds McNulty. “If anybody can work with the councilman and vendors in a

Emma Beno (left) and Alexia Rodriguez (right). (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

Amanda Dempsey, the new manager. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

very collaborative way, she’s the right person. She can bring everybody together, move the conversation forward.” Vendors say the bad produce problem is one example. For years, customers have complained of a few “bad apple” vendors who sell rotten produce, taking items from behind the shelf and slipping them in your bag. By the time you notice, you’re already home. Dempsey has apparently stepped up efforts to remedy this longstanding issue. “Amanda, for the first time in 25 years, has aggressively addressed [the problem of bad produce],” says Holcepl. “She had a complaint from a customer, went to that stand, went through the produce and shut them down. The message has gotten sent.” In conversations with Scene, other vendors stated that the problem, which they say has been going on largely unaddressed for many years, is finally getting some real attention. In terms of her priorities, Dempsey says that she is working to enhance customer service and follow up on customer feedback; facilitate basic physical improvements such as plumbing upgrades to keep the market in working order; respond to vendors’ service requests quickly; and attract more locally grown and raised food products. “It’s important that the market continues to be one the best public markets in the country,” she says. “We want it to continue to attract new customers, to continue to build on its strong customer base.” One of the things that Dempsey has done is simply to enforce tenants’

existing leases. In the past, many tenants would not open their stands on Mondays because it’s often a slow day. This became a self-fulfilling prophecy, since customers who wanted the full market experience would avoid shopping on that day. However, their lease requires them to be open when the market is open: Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday. On a recent Monday visit to the West Side Market, this Scene reporter noticed that nearly every stand was open. “I have been taking attendance,” Dempsey says.

A fresh crop of leAders The vendors’ association board is also being run by a new, younger guard. Boutros is a 30-year-old produce vendor whose father worked at the market, and Beno is 24. The change is evident not simply in the ages of the board members, but in their attitudes. When they meet with the city, they’re not singing kumbaya, but they are talking. “There’s no aggression in the room at all, and the attitude between us has changed a lot,” says Beno. “A lot of vendors are resistant to change, especially in a building that hasn’t changed in a long time. But the fact is, we never needed to change, and now we need to change.” One problem in the past, she says, was that the board was run by older vendors who didn’t represent everyone. For instance, not all vendors are opposed to charging for parking, but the leadership came out swinging when that idea was first proposed.


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“These are rough-and-tumble guys,” says Beno. “You put them in a position that they’re not familiar with, with high-up city employees who are very bureaucratic and don’t say much in a lot of words, and these guys just don’t know how to play the city game.” Beno apparently does play the game. She ruffled feathers a few years ago when she complained about the stance the association took on the parking problem and earned her share of resentment. When she and her partner, Alexia Rodriguez, put a blue equality sign on their stand, a few of the vendors asked them to take it down. Yet the affable Beno shrugs off the incident; she stood up to them and they backed off. “I’ve been working here since I was 14 – so it’s not like I just walked in here,” she says. A new approach is needed, Beno says. The older generation of vendors had become so used to being ignored by the city, they often assumed an adversarial stance out of habit. “They were angry with the city in the past because they’d asked for things and didn’t get them,” she says. “These guys had been duct-taping things together for many decades.” One example of the vendors’ proactive approach is that they’ve been working closely with the city to ensure that employees park off site, freeing up parking for customers. Yet don’t expect the association to

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Ensuring customers don’t get rotten produce is a focus. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

give up the fight on paid parking that easily. The group is looking at other solutions and preparing for discussions with city officials.

Diversifying the proDuct mix The growing interest in locally grown and raised produce and meat is evidenced by the explosive growth of farmers markets. Yet even as the market for local food has grown, the West Side Market has staunchly remained the same, with just a few local products. Many vendors say this is a problem. “I think the market as a whole is missing the boat when it comes to local foods,” says Gary Thomas of Ohio City Pasta, a 25-year-old company that makes all of its products from scratch right in

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the neighborhood. There are many vendors who carry local food, from Anne Marie’s Dairy to Basketeria. Yet most of the market’s produce is trucked in from outside the area, a lot of the meat that’s sold here isn’t from Northeast Ohio, and only one stand has grassfed beef. That, too, is starting to change. The new stand Rooted in Cleveland is one example of a local produce vendor that is now selling its products at the market. It hasn’t been easy, especially given the paucity of product that was available this past winter, but stand owner Travis Alley says that he’s developed a loyal following over the past year. “It was kind of amazing, even in the depths of winter when all we had was rutabaga and turnips, people stuck with us,” says Alley, who represents many urban farmers in Cleveland at his stand, such as Maggie’s Farm in the Stockyards neighborhood. “I’ve been overwhelmed with the support we’ve gotten from the community at large.” Alley and his wife, Felicia Marie


It seems these guys got to market just at the right time. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

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PostscriPt (AKA: Why isn’t it oPen more?) Besides the parking, the biggest elephant in the room right now is the market’s days and hours. Believe it or not, the schedule was set decades ago so that it didn’t conflict with the Central Market, which was open Tuesdays and Thursdays. The Central Market, of course, burned down in 1949 – but the West Side Market has remained unchanged. Some complain that the market’s hours are impractical and don’t serve

customers or businesses. “The hours need to be convenient for customers, that’s No. 1,” says Holcepl. “I don’t have enough days in the week to sell my stuff. I’d love to be open Sunday, to add another day to my schedule. I’m working at capacity now.” Other vendors disagree, saying that they already work long hours and don’t want to add a day. City officials remain tight-lipped on whether the hours or days of operation could change. The city installed traffic counters on the doorways in July, Dempsey said, and after a year’s worth of data has been collected, officials will analyze it and develop recommendations regarding days and hours that will best serve customers. In general, many of the challenges that the market faces are fortunate ones – essentially, growing pains. The West Side Market is the hub of one of the city’s most successful, dynamic neighborhoods, and whatever its future is, it will offer lessons for the city. “We’ve gone from 30-percent vacancy to almost zero [in storefronts] and seen $200 million in investment and o \ver 700 new jobs created in recent years,” says Wobser of the surrounding Ohio City neighborhood, citing the market as one driver of that success. “These are great things for the city, the market and for the neighborhood. Managing that growth becomes a challenge, but we’re committed to addressing it.”

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Alley, are planning to launch a pour-over coffee stand this year with Rising Star coffee. They hope this will help them get through next winter. Dempsey has made adding more locally grown and raised food a priority. The market now offers seasonal leases for growers that don’t have enough product to be open all winter long. Other local vendors include Maple Valley Sugarbush, Grace Brothers and Jorgensen’s Apiary. The short section of the arcade is becoming a local food hub. Inside the market, the Pork Chop Shop will soon sell exclusively local pork from New Creation Farm in Chardon. The stand owners hope to inspire others to do the same. “It will really be farm to table for us,” says co-owner Alexia Rodriguez, who will be adding charcuterie from local butcher Melissa Khoury and breaking down pigs at her stand, giving visitors a chance to learn where their food comes from.

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C o m e dy

Dirty Talk George Wilborn is a proud dad, and he makes sure his son is headed in the right direction. When his son told him he might like to be a surgeon, George smacked him across the face and told him he was going to be a rapper. Other topics of humor include Mexican immigrants and their ice cream trucks, less endowed guys and some other nasty stuff we’d rather not mention. This guy is pretty irreverent and definitely offensive, but he’ll make you laugh. Don’t bring the kids to this one. Tonight’s show starts at 7:30 p.m. at the Improv, and performances run through Sunday. Tickets are $17 to $39. (Liz Trenholme) 1148 Main Ave., 216-696-IMPROV, clevelandimprov.com. Film

Film

A King’s Tale Verdi’s Nabucco is brought to life in the Royal Opera House production starring the opera great, Placido Domingo. This stunning filmed production of the opera classic bases its story on the biblical tale of King Nebuchadnezzar, a story in which the king, Nabucco, aims to decimate Jerusalem as an act of revenge. Not one of Verdi’s commonly performed operas, this production offers a fantastic recreation of one of the composer’s early works. This one-time showing at Capitol Theatre starts tonight at 7. Tickets are $20. (Patrick Stoops) 1390 West 65th St., 216-651-7295, clevelandcinemas.com. C o m e dy

Meatballs, Not Basketballs Sebastian Maniscalco puts a second-generation twist on everything he talks about, and it’s pretty funny. He observes how 50 years ago, his Italian mom would save a cake “just for visitors” and leave the crap muffins for the family to eat. Nowadays his mother cusses and pulls out a sword every time the doorbell rings. You won’t ever catch this guy playing basketball because Italians “don’t play sports” in America. Give him a meatball sandwich instead, and he’ll paint your whole ceiling. You’ll feel right at home if you happen to come from an Italian family, but even if you don’t, this guy’s observations are hilariously spot-on. The show starts at 8 tonight at Hilarities; performances continue through Sunday. Tickets are $23 to 25. (Trenholme) 2035 East Fourth St., 216-241-7425, pickwickandfrolic.com. Arts

Om is Where the Heart Is Come get your Om on with Brianna Halloran as she guides you through 75 minutes of breathing and movement designed to up your awareness of the way life moves around and within each of us. This special evening is designed to pair with MOCA’s

Cali Miles is looking for a few good bombshells for her Bombsquad. See: Sunday. (Photo by Jarette Howell Photography)

current DIRGE: Reflections on [Life and] Death exhibit, and ticket price includes admission to the galleries. Background music for the practice will include a live performance by J. Graves. You don’t need any prior yoga experience, but a thick yoga mat and comfortable clothing that allows you to move and stretch are required. It all takes place in MOCA’s ground floor space at 6:30 p.m. and costs $15. (Trenholme) 11400 Euclid Ave., 216-421-8671, mocacleveland.org.

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05/16

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Fresh Ink Those that commit suicide leave behind more than they ever imagine. From memories to simple

material possessions, the wake of tragedy ripples through loved ones’ lives. In the new play Left in Ink, creator and Cleveland Public Theatre director fellow Caitlin Lewins explores how one copes, focusing on those who have permanently marked their bodies with memorial tattoos. The play’s point is to ask if it’s all right to laugh, to move on and to lead a fulfilling life. The ensemble shares heart-warming and heartwrenching stories that confront the issues surrounding mental illness. The show runs through May 31 in Cleveland Public Theatre’s Storefront Studio. Tonight’s performance takes place at 7 p.m. and tickets are $12 to $28. (Stoops) 6415 Detroit Ave., 216-631-2727, cptonline.org.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

High Anxiety Wadjda, the first film shot entirely within Saudi borders by a female writer-director, screens this evening at the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque at 6:45 p.m. It plays again tomorrow night at 7. Wadjda, about a rebel girl who competes at Koranic recitation to win money so she can buy a bike, succeeds as a cultural tour of the Saudi female experience. The film shows a striking range of practical “women problems” — anxiety about menstruation, the inconveniences of etiquette around men, the inexhaustible imperative for delicacy — as well as grander and more symbolic social inequalities like polygamy, the absence of women on family trees and absolute romantic and sexual inhibition. The film makes the struggles of a young girl the narrative centerpiece in a matrix of related struggles in the adult world, and is a massive accomplishment given the fact that women are still stoned in Saudi Arabia for things like, you know, driving. (Sam Allard) 11141 East Blvd., 216-421-7450, cia.edu.

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21


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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Play Time Cleveland, it’s time to loosen up. Contrast High is pairing up with funny man Ricky Smith to show adults how to live, play, work and connect in kindness. This is the perfect night to talk, exchange ideas and just goof around. Don’t worry — there will be plenty of bars set up for a drink break; the activities will keep on coming. The event starts at 7:30 at Red Space. Tickets are $25. (Jenna Conforti) 2400 Superior Ave., facebook.com/hotcards.

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The Play’s the Thing This is Not the Play delves into one of the 21st century’s most uncomfortable topics: racism. The play explores the issue of a black playwright attempting to write the roles of several white, semi-selfaware characters. Lines blur as the play tries to define the difference between American racism and the playwright’s own prejudices. Directed by Emily Ritger, the play is full of intense humor built on this uniquely post-modern conflict. The show runs through May 31 in Cleveland Public Theatre’s James Levin Theatre. Tonight’s performance takes place at 7 p.m. and tickets are $12 to $28. (Stoops) 6415 Detroit Ave., 216-631-2727, cptonline.org.

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Nightlife

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Roxy Remembered Every year, the folks at Ohio Burlesque pay homage to the burlesque of yesteryear with Roxy Remembered, an event that features a slew of popular local and regional dancers. This year, acts such as Lushes La Moan, Xander Lovecraft, Bella Sin and Doll Bambino are all slated to perform. In addition, the event features vaudeville acts, skits and live music. General admission is $15; reserved seating is $20. VIP tickets cost $30. (Jeff Niesel) 15711 Waterloo Rd., 216-383-1124, beachlandballroom.com.

Jam Session Summer means festivals and Blue Sky Folk Festival, one of the season’s earliest, promises to be a good one. Frank Solivan & Dirty Kitchen headline and bluegrass-y acts such as Hillbilly IDOL, Hal Walker, Klein Family, Bob Frank and Matt Watroba are also on the bill. You can also attend workshops on clogging and guitar maintenance. The event takes place today from 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. on the grounds of the East Shore Unitarian Universalist Church in Kirtland. Tickets are $8 in advance, $10 at the door. (Niesel) 10848 Chillicothe Rd., Kirtland, 440-417-2796, blueskyfolkfest.com.

SportS

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Brantley’s personal bats, have come alive! The starting pitching — thanks in no small part to Josh Tomlin’s Randy Thompson mullet — has settled into a whifftastic groove. After a pretty dismal showing through the month of April, the Indians are playing some exciting baseball. But the A’s have the AL West’s best record and have proven to be one of the leagues’ most dominant all-around teams in the early going. Former Tribe hurler Scott Kazmir has pitched well for the A’s and young ace Sonny Gray’s ERA seems to do nothing but shrink. First pitch tonight and tomorrow at 7:05. They go at it again at 1:05 p.m. on Sunday. (Allard) 2401 Ontario St., 216-916-6100, clevelandindians.com.

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film

Fright Night Meat Loaf and Minnie Driver star in Stage Fright, a gory horror flick about a makeup man who tries to derail a kabuki production of the Phantom of the Opera-like play The Haunting of the Opera that’s being put on by a theater summer camp. All sorts of backstage shenanigans threaten to derail the production. And it doesn’t help that there’s a killer on the loose either. The film screens tonight at midnight at the Capitol Theatre. Tickets are $5. (Niesel) 1390 West 65th St., 216-651-7295, clevelandcinemas.com.


Film

Jazz Greats Jazz and cinema are two art forms that developed in tandem, and the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque celebrates this relationship in what’s been dubbed the Double-C JazzFilmFest. This first-ever jazz film series is dedicated to the memory of WCPN’s Jazz Tracks host Bobby Jackson. The series runs until June 21 and serves as a fitting prelude to Tri-C JazzFest. Tonight’s iteration includes the new documentary A Great Day in Cleveland: Behind the Scenes, depicting 143 local jazz musicians and supporters creating in image inspired by Art Kane’s iconic 1958 photograph A Great Day in Harlem. This short is followed by the Oscarnominated documentary A Great Day in Harlem, giving insight to the aforementioned famous photo. The screening begins tonight at 5:15 and the film also shows at 4:30 p.m. tomorrow. Bird, Clint Eastwood’s portrait of Charlie Parker starring Forest Whitaker, also screens tonight at 6:45. Tickets are $9. (Eric Gonzalez) 11141 East Blvd., 216-421-7450, cia.edu. Arts

C o m e dy

Local Humor Cleveland’s comedy scene is growing. Apart from creating comedic

musiC

Night at the Opera The folks at the Cleveland Orchestra are calling their production of The Cunning Little Vixen the “opera event of the season.” They just might be right. Featuring original animation, the production promises to “plumb the depths of human experience in a charming tale of love, peril, freedom, and family.” Sung in Czech with English supertitles, the opera centers on Vixen (Czech soprano Martina Janková) as she tries to find happiness. Tonight’s performance takes place at 8 p.m. at Severance Hall with repeat performances scheduled to take place at 7:30 p.m. on Tuesday, at 7:30 p.m. on Thursday, May 22, and at 2 p.m. on Saturday, May 24. Student tickets are $10 ($15 if purchased less than one hour prior to concert start time) and tickets for the general public start at $71. (Niesel) 11001 Euclid Ave., 216-231-1111, clevelandorchestra.com. Arts

Street Stuff The Hessler Street Fair is back again. This yearly Cleveland fixture is located on Hessler Street of course, in the University Circle neighborhood. The festivities include arts and crafts you can’t find anywhere else, local music acts, and booths dedicated to various alternative lifestyles. Local, independent food vendors will be offering everything from ice cream and coffee to vegan fare and fresh, straight-from-the-farm items. New for the kids this year

Twilight_Scene_May2FINAL.indd 1

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Local Hero Did you see Scene’s cover story about Charles Ramsey three weeks ago? Part of the story was how Ramsey is envisioning the publication of his book Dead Giveaway as the first step in the construction of a new, international brand of which he will be the center. Ramsey’s on a local book tour for Dead Giveaway, and will appear at the Eton Center Barnes & Noble on Chagrin Boulevard this afternoon from 1 to 3 p.m. Say what you will about Charles Ramsey, he’s incredibly giving of his time and is always more than happy to pose for pictures and sign copies of his book. Though the book itself leaves much to be desired, we can’t recommend spending some time with a local hero highly enough. (Allard) 28801 Chagrin Blvd., Woodmere, 216-765-7520, barnesandnoble.com.

greats like Drew Carey and Dave Hill, the underground scene is quickly producing solid comedians with unique life perspectives. The Chucklefck comedy shows are at the forefront of this intentionally hilarious movement. For $6 tonight at Reddstone, you can check out some of Cleveland’s funnier assets in this five-comedian-deep line-up. While most of these comedians are still early in their careers, they’re more than capable of creating a night full of laughs. The bar upstairs opens at 9 and the show starts at 10 with $5 burgers, pizzas and wings and drink specials. (Stoops) 1261 West 76th St., 216-651-6969, reddstonecleveland.com.

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Get out! are pony rides (benefitting a pony rescue farm) at Harmony Park. It all starts at 11 and runs until dusk, both today and tomorrow. (Trenholme) hesslerstreetfair.org.

sun 05/18 Food

Best Fete French for “summer party,” Fete d’Ete is an annual bike-food event that hits all the major joints in downtown Cleveland. The ride starts at Bar Cento in Ohio City and then goes to Lolita in Tremont and Cowell & Hubbard near Playhouse Square. After stopping at Lago on the east bank of the Flats, participants will head over to the Black Pig in Ohio City. While it seems like a strenuous ride, it only totals about 10 miles. The event takes place from 6 to 10 p.m. so be sure to have a light on your bike for the portion of the ride that will take place once the

sun goes down. Tickets are $8. (Niesel) tinyurl.com/fetecleveland. NightliFe

Hot Stuff Local singer-turned-entrepreneur Cali Miles now runs her own talent group that deals with, as she puts it, “all facets of the entertainment industry.” Tonight from 8 to midnight at Shooters, she’ll host auditions for her Bomb Squad. “We’re looking for all kinds of women, ranging from dancers to DJs,” says Miles. “But we’re also looking for leaders. We’re looking for young women who want to go out into the community and give back because that’s really important to us as well.” You can bet some of the hottest dancers and models in town will be on hand for the event, which is open to the public. Plus, Miles will perform as well. A panel of celebrity judges will rate the best performers, and audience members can vote for their favorite performer as well. “I’m really excited to see all the girls perform,” she says. (Niesel) 1148 Main Ave., 216-861-6900, shootersflats.com.

NightliFe

Shake It Down Probably the best way to kick-start the week is by shaking your ass uncontrollably at Shake It Down, B-Side’s bitchin’ Sunday night electronic shows. DJs Eso and Corey Grand join forces to spin anything and everything: funk, soul, hip-hop, trap, drum and bass, and all sorts of similarly ill shit. Grand’s cred speaks for itself: “Sucka Free Since ’88.” And that same sentiment goes for the Sunday-night throwdown as a whole. Work your way across Coventry all weekend and wrap up the party at B-Side. The DJs start spinning at 10 p.m. (Eric Sandy) 2785 Euclid Heights Blvd., Cleveland Heights, 216-932-1966, bsideliquorlounge.com.

mon 05/19 NightliFe

Another Manic Monday Keeping the indie comedy scene alive downtown, Liquid is now hosting Manic Mondays. Put on by Chucklefck, the guys who bring you about 80 percent of

Cleveland’s comedy, this show features regulars Ramon Rivas, Brian Kenny, Mary Santora and Robbie Bourne with a host of other acts both local and out-of-towners. Tonight, the bar opens at 8 and the show starts at 8:30. Admission is free and the club will offer halfoff drink specials. We can’t think of a better way to start the week. (Stoops) 1212 West Sixth St., 216-479-7717, liquidcleveland.com. NightliFe

Sketchy Stuff Who says a sketch class needs to be in a boring, stuffy lecture hall? While the events held by national “anti-art school” Dr. Sketchy don’t necessarily teach those who attend how to draw, the latest Cleveland edition in the Beachland Tavern will provide a venue for artists to try their hand at sketching with brews from the Ballroom bar in hand. The fun starts at 8 p.m., and tickets are $10. (Jacob DeSmit) 15711 Waterloo Rd., 216-383-1124, beachlandballroom.com.

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joe written and performed by Elizabeth A. Davis May 17 • A reading of a new folk musical

FairField written by Eric Coble

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

May 17 • A reading

“…the kind of work theatre needs more of” —The Plain Dealer

“Hire a babysitter, change vacation plans — do whatever you need to do — but don’t miss this show.” —The Plain Dealer

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grounded

Co-produced with Geva Theatre Center Written by Deborah Zoe Laufer • Directed by Sean Daniels April 23 - May 18 • Second Stage

CPH presents Page 73’s production Written by George Brant • Directed by Ken Rus Schmoll Wednesday-Saturday, May 7-17 • The Helen

Science allows us to know more about ourselves than ever before. But how much do we want to know—and who gets to decide how that information is used? Based on a true story, Informed Consent takes us into the personal and national debate about science vs. belief and whether our DNA is our destiny.

An unexpected pregnancy ends an ace fighter pilot’s career in the sky. Reassigned to operate military drones from a windowless trailer outside Las Vegas, she hunts terrorists by day and returns to her family each night. As the pressure to track a high-profile target mounts, the boundaries begin to blur between the desert in which she lives and the one she patrols half a world away.

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Arts

The Write Stuff Tonight at 6:30 at Prosperity Social Club, clewords.com, a website devoted to Northeast Ohio readers and writers, presents Writing Without Hiding, a workshop designed to “help you identify and overcome the barriers that may be holding you back.” Justin Glanville, author of Writing Without Hiding: How to Write What You Mean and Be Heard in the New Economy, will lead a discussion. He’s the author of New to Cleveland: A Guide to (Re)Discovering the City and contributed to Rust Belt Rising: Almanac 2013. He also freelances for a number of publications. An informal writing session follows Glanville’s talk. Each paid registrant receives a signed copy of the book. Tickets are $30. (Niesel) 1109 Starkweather Ave., 216-937-1938, prosperitysocialclub.com. Nightlife

food

Vegan Mondays If you’re vegan, vegetarian, gluten free, or just plain interested in trying something new, head over to Townhall in Ohio City this evening from 5 to 10 p.m. for Vegan Night. Work your way through the delicious

tue

05/20

C o m e dy

Good for a Chuckle Reddstone, Chucklefck’s Tuesday-night hideout, is one of Cleveland’s terrific little incubators of humor. “It’s been cool to see that kinda develop and congeal over the years,” Chucklefck emcee Ramon Rivas told Scene in 2013. The openmic celebration of local comedy has gathered fans across the region in recent years. And each week, the room gets packed with youthful hordes thirsty for the type of interaction that only a comedian can provide. “There’s a young nucleus of people who are all at the open mics,” Rivas says. “You need those rooms to be able to go and develop that new stuff.” Reddstone and the Chucklefck following take care of that with deft skill. The comedy starts at 8 p.m. (Sandy) 1261 West 76th St., 216-651-6969, reddstonecleveland.com. musiC

It’s a Revolution For many years, classical music wasn’t intended for the masses. Seemingly reserved for quasiexclusive concert halls, classical music hid from the outside world. Classical Revolution Cleveland helps tear down that wall and once again bring great chamber music to the people. Showcasing a variety of performers in bars, cafes and the like, it’s actually not that different from how people used to listen to chamber music. The third Tuesday of every month, CRC brings its wide

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Trivia Pursuits Do you have tons of obscure music knowledge? Are you a student of fast food menus and their nuanced histories? What say you about the geographic evolution of Scotch whisky? Tonight’s your chance to wow your friends, make yourself instantly more desirable to someone you’re newly dating, and hang with Cleveland’s headiest hipsters and hot dog lovers. It’s the Happy Dog Monday night trivia. Starting at 8 p.m., expect themed rounds — it’s a crap shot — and general knowledge questions that seem considerably trickier than some of the other live trivia locales in town. Obviously, have a hot dog and a craft brew while you’re at it. And arrive early. The tables fill up quickly. (Allard) 5801 Detroit Ave., 216-651-9474, happydogcleveland.com.

and healthy vegan menu, featuring hits like Veggie Vegan Flatbread (think fresh tomatoes, chiles, mushrooms and vegan cheese), Tofu Etouffee (blackened tofu, onions, tomatoes and brown rice) or many of the regular menu items made vegan (we recommend the Thai Bowl). If you’re still feeling skeptical, know this: Monday night is also Craft Beer Night and all 36-ounce drafts are just $3. (Alaina McConnell) 1909 West 25th St., 216-344-9400, townhallohiocity.com.

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Get out!

DELLA MAE 6/05

CaBinET & dRiFTwood nEw Music Monday

6/09

An EvEning wiTh

ThE MAvEricks 6/06

BlaCK LiLLiEs 6/11

Ralph STanlEy & ThE ClinCh MounTain BoyS FaREwEll TouR

6/07

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John SEBaSTian 6/08

livingSTon TayloR

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& ChERyl whEElER

6/12

6/14

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

175 E. Main St., Kent 330.677.5005 • www.facebook.com/TheKentStage Tickets @ http://www.kentstage.org/

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array of chamber music to the Happy Dog. Performers like the Trepanning Trio, Anime Duo, students of Cleveland Institute of Music and even Cleveland Orchestra members grace the stage in these exciting concerts. Full of immensely talented performers, CRC re-instills the relevancy of this vibrant art form. Tonight’s free, all-ages performance starts at 9. (Stoops) 5801 Detroit Ave., 216-651-9474, happydogcleveland.com. Music

Rocking for a Reason Cleveland acts the Ohio Weather Band, Megan Zurkey, Techn!color, Thr33s Company and Tori Groves perform tonight at 7 at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum as part of a benefit concert organized by Shaker Heights High School sophomore Maisie Hanley. The goal is to raise awareness of Down syndrome, and all proceeds will be donated to the Up Side of Downs organization. Tickets cost $20 for adults and $10 for students and children under 12. The main exhibit hall will be open and attendees can participate in a silent auction as they learn more about the accomplishments of people with Down syndrome and the local organization. (Niesel) 1100 Rock and Roll Blvd., 216-515-8444, rockhall.com.

wed 05/21 Arts

Best of the Midwest The May edition of Belt Out features a lively trio of writers published in Midwestern Gothic, a cool Ann Arbor-based literary magazine that features the same kind of sharp, sophisticated writing you find in Cleveland’s own Belt Magazine. Tonight at 7:30 at the Happy Dog, you can hear Midwestern Gothic contributors Rachel Hall (fiction), Kate E. Schultz (poetry) and Matt Young (fiction) read from their work at 7:30. Admission is free. (Niesel) 5801 Detroit Ave., 216-651-9474,

happydogcleveland.com. FilM

Lear Here One of Shakespeare’s most heart-wrenching tragedies, King Lear finds a king who wants to distribute his land among his three daughters, with portions depending upon which of them praises him most eloquently. Lear is one of those roles that old British actors get huge boners for the chance to play, and this time it’s Simon Russell Beale, a guy whose name you don’t know, but whose face you’d probably recognize. Sam Mendes (Skyfall) directs this classic, which is brought to you live this evening at the Cedar Lee at 7 p.m. Be forewarned: It’s three-and-a-halfhours long, but it’s live theater (sort of), so enjoy. Tix are $20 (which is only like $3 more than an IMAX 3-D movie at Crocker, so don’t get all indignant). (Allard) 2163 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, 440-717-4696, clevelandcinemas.com. Arts

Miller’s Tale Lauren Miller is an author and TV writer from Atlanta who now lives in Los Angeles — but she’ll be in Cleveland tonight, at Visible Voice Books in Tremont, to read from her new novel Free to Fall about our society’s increasing reliance on technology, and the ramifications of that reliance. The novel envisions an app called LUX which optimizes decisionmaking and affects human interaction “from which coffee to order” to “whom to date.” It’s an imaginative sci-fi thriller and Miller will be only too pleased to talk about how she dreamt it all up when you come visit her at the bookshop, have a glass of wine, and buy her book for good measure. She’ll be chilling at Visible Voice Books from 6 to 8 this evening. (Allard) 1023 Kenilworth Ave., 216-961-0084, visiblevoicebooks.com.

Get Out! The only calendar you need. t @cleveland_scene


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27


stage

review

Where’s snooki? (Photo courtesy of Playhouse Square)

FELONS AND FALSETTOS

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

The post-juvenile delinquents are back in Jersey Boys at Playhouse Square By Christine Howey

28

Know how to tell a highclass Italian restaurant from a dump? “They don’t sell slices.” That, plus other nuggets of wisdom, is now available because the uber-popular jukebox musical Jersey Boys has landed again at Playhouse Square. The melodies rattled off by Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons still have that familiar glow. The production is as slick and smooth as ever, spinning out the story of some rough-around-the-edges (okay, ex-convict) young men who happen to make some of the most memorable music from the mid-’60s. But there is a level of effervescence and electricity that’s missing from this touring troupe. The problem lies with a lead singer who doesn’t quite soar, as well as a general lack of comradeship and tension among the various Seasons. True to the usual MTV script of a band struggling to find its distinctive sound, ramrod risk-taker Tommy DeVito, passive dreamer Nick Massi and falsetto Frankie bounce from one dirtbag club to another, constantly changing the group’s focus, not to

mention their name (the Travelers, the Four Lovers, the Romans, etc.). Of course, there are interludes when one or more of the fellows is locked up in prison, the “Rahway Academy of the Arts,” after seeking ancillary income from various illegal activities. But when Bob Gaudio, the precocious 15-year-old songwriter of the hit “Short Shorts” hears Frankie hit the high notes on stage, Gaudio decides to join the happy band of crooning felons. Around the same time, the boys are hanging out at a bowling alley that has a partially burnt-out sign that appears to say “OUR SONS.” But when an electrician finally fixes it, and it lights up as “FOUR SEASONS,” the guys have an epiphany (“It’s a sign!”) and discover their permanent moniker. Much of the sound of the Four Seasons can be attributed to producer Bob Crewe, a man given to astrological readings and blunt assessments of the boys’ music. As performed by Barry Anderson, Crewe is an amusing bundle of histrionic quirks, but he’s indisputably a

genuine music maven. Gaudio starts by writing a song that shows off Valli’s extraordinary pipes to maximum effect. Once the guys record “Sherry,” it becomes a No.1 hit. And when they follow it up with two more monsters (“Big Girls Don’t Cry” and “Walk Like a Man”), the group is on its trajectory to stardom. Naturally, the loose canon Tommy (played with an appropriately short fuse by Nicolas Dromard) finds a way to get himself sunk deep in debt, and eventually the others decide to bail him out of a more than a $.5 million hole (that was real money back in the day). Then there are the personal issues the boys face, including an unspeakable tragedy within Frankie’s family. Eventually Valli starts a solo career with the international sensation, “My Eyes Adored You.” By utilizing live video recording along with archival video and cartoon graphics, the production moves through all these stories with seamless efficiency. Quinn VanAntwerp returns to town as Gaudio and still manages

to capture some of that very young man’s innocence, even if the actor’s receding hairline sends a different signal. And Adam Zelasko gets some laughs as the deadpan Massi, although his bass singing feels a bit thin and unsupported. In the central and unforgiving role of Valli, Hayden Milanes gives it his best shot. But he doesn’t possess the true, pure falsetto of Joseph Leo Bwarie, who played this role in at least two previous companies that visited here. As a result, those magical high notes don’t quite pierce the heart as they have in the past. But if you love these tunes, this version of Jersey Boys will bring memories flooding back. There just may be a few goose bumps missing.

Jersey boys Through May 18, 1615 Euclid Ave., 216-241-6000, playhousesquare.org.

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene


You and a Guest are invited to see

in memorium A FINAL BOW FOR REUBEN SILVER

Thus, 21 years after he started at Karamu, Reuben was asked to leave. But he quickly landed a slot as a professor of theater arts at Cleveland State University, working in that capacity for 17 years. Reuben’s activity in the theater was curtailed after he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease a few years ago. But with Dorothy’s continual and tender caretaking, he remained mentally sharp and remarkably positive virtually until the end. In the past few years, I have been honored to be included in a monthly lunch attended by, among others, the Silvers. Even four or five months ago, battling various complications of his illness and old age, Reuben still had the instinctive comic timing of a born trouper. Over Cobb salads, Reuben and Dorothy would recite, from memory, old vaudeville-style bits — Dorothy’s hand always lovingly touching his. And like a perfectly oiled comedy team, Reuben would land the punch line with devastating, hilarious precision. Even up to the end, Reuben’s sense of timing never left him. He seemed to intentionally delay his passing until Dorothy’s most recent stage appearance, a stunning performance in ’night Mother at Beck Center, was completed on May 4. He always knew the show must go on. And so it will, for Dorothy as well as their three children and four grandchildren. For them, and us, the show will forever be burnished to a warm glow because we were touched, in so many ways, by the gentle genius of Reuben Silver. — Christine Howey

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene

MondaY, MaY 19tH, 7:00 P.M.

PLease visit WWW.GoFoBo.CoM/rsvP and enter tHe Code sCeneredJ to doWnLoad Your CoMPLiMentarY Passes! This film is rated PG-13 for crude and sexual content, and language. Please note: Passes are limited and will be distributed on a first come, first served basis while supplies last. No phone calls, please. Limit one pass per person. Each pass admits two. Seating is not guaranteed. Arrive early. Theater is not responsible for overbooking. This screening will be monitored for unauthorized recording. By attending, you agree not to bring any audio or video recording device into the theater (audio recording devices for credentialed press excepted) and consent to a physical search of your belongings and person. Any attempted use of recording devices will result in immediate removal from the theater, forfeiture, and may subject you to criminal and civil liability. Please allow additional time for heightened security. You can assist us by leaving all nonessential bags at home or in your vehicle.

IN THEATERS MAy 23 #BLended • BLendedMovie.CoM

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

He never lost His timing. Reuben Silver, master of many theatrical arts including acting and directing, died last week at the age of 88. And even though he had been ailing for quite a while, it still seems like a shock that someone so vital, so wise and so funny would ever leave us. In a lifetime of splendid timing, he has surprised us one last time. In a theater career that spanned many decades and included long stints as the artistic director of Karamu House, Reuben Silver influenced countless lives. And all those lives, including mine, are so much brighter for the light he so generously shed. Reuben and Dorothy married in 1949, but they had been acting in college together for the previous three years. That partnership, with each of them also taking on directing duties, lasted for many years after they moved to Cleveland in 1955. They were initially brought here by Karamu House founders Rowena and Russell Jelliffe, since the Silvers’ approach to theater resonated with the Jelliffe’s passion for an interracial theater as an agent of social change. So Reuben signed on as artistic director and Dorothy became the resident guest director. As Reuben stated in a 2009 interview with the Benjamin Rose Institute on Aging, “By the early 1960s, America was a ferment of race due to the Civil Rights Movement, and that made Karamu House an exciting place to be. You felt you were at the center of something important.” During their time at Karamu, the Silvers were instrumental in presenting works by African American authors including Langston Hughes and LeRoi Jones (soon to become Amiri Baraka). They also presented a variety of classical plays from the American theater portfolio. Eventually, waves of unrest in the inner-city neighborhood that surrounded Karamu changed the tenor of the times and forced a reconsideration of Karamu’s goals and operational direction.

29


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movies

this week

review of the week

ALso opening

planet. Bernstein, with the help of a snoring retired scout (Alan Arkin) and an enthusiastic local (the marvelous Pitobash, in his Hollywood debut) harvests two promising athletes from a pool of thousands and brings them to the United States to learn the game and try out for a major league club. Bernstein navigates a budding romance with his doctor-to-be tenant (Lake Bell) and the thorny gamesmanship of other big-ticket signings, all while seeming to ignore his frightened Indian houseguests who want nothing more than to make their benefactor proud. Will Bernstein continue to treat these gifted young men merely as publicity stunts or will he come to recognize their humanity? Because it’s Disney, the answer should be fairly predictable, but Bernstein’s transformation is rendered with originality, humor and tremendous heart. With nearperfect doses of culture-clash comedy, mushy stuff, and baseball montages, not to mention the nuanced performances from both Hamm and the Indian youngsters (Life of Pi’s Suraj Sharma and Slumdog Millionaire’s Madhur Mittal), this one really is fun for the whole family. — Sam Allard

Fed Up This documentary tackles the obesity issue and puts forth the notion that “Big Sugar” is the real culprit behind our growing waistlines. The film opens on Friday at the Cedar Lee Theatre.

God’s Pocket Based on a 1983 novel of the same name about a mysterious death at a construction site, this film features Philip Seymour Hoffman in one of his final roles. It opens on Friday at the Cedar Lee Theatre.

As he’s driving home from work one day Ivan Locke (Tom Hardy) stops at a traffic light. It turns green and he doesn’t move. A cement truck honks at him. He pauses. He eventually adjusts his turn signal and heads off in the opposite direction. And so begins writer-director Steven Knight’s Locke, a movie that takes place entirely within the confines of Ivan’s car. While that might make the film, which opens on Friday at the Cedar Lee Theatre, seem like a mere novelty, Hardy’s performance and the sharp script make it a riveting experience. As Ivan drives from the construction site where he works as a foreman to London where he has to take care of a personal problem, we slowly learn what made his change his mind when he was at the stoplight. The phone in his car doesn’t stop ringing as he drives. His wife and kids wonder why he’s not coming home to watch a soccer match. His boss wonders why he won’t be on the job in the morning to pour the slab for a giant skyscraper. His co-worker wonders how he’ll be able to oversee the cement work without Ivan. All the while, Ivan remains fairly even keel, even as he curses his late father for being a deadbeat dad. He keeps telling himself that he can make things right but his boss wants to fires him over the phone and his wife threatens to leave him. Ivan continues to try to do things by the book. He tells his co-worker everything he needs to know to make the job run smoothly — he even makes a few calls to make sure the right roads are closed so the trucks can get to the site. He tells his wife that he’d like to “proceed to the next step” once they resolve their differences. The film would seem to lend itself to some dramatic crash scene, but that’s not how Knight keeps us interested. Rather, as Ivan drives, his car occasionally rattles as he goes over a bump. It’s a nice metaphor for life. And it shows the extent to which the film employs subtlety in showing how one wrong move can make a person’s life turn into a series of painstaking negotiations. — Jeff Niesel

Godzilla Breaking Bad’s Bryan Cranston stars as a nuclear physicist in this remake of the classic Japanese monster movie; it promises to be one of the summer’s biggest blockbusters. The movie opens areawide on Friday.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Before we dive heAdLong into whAt will be (spoiler) an overwhelmingly positive review of the new Disney baseball flick million dollar Arm, which opens areawide on Friday, let me try to get blurbed here real quick. Ahem: Million Dollar Arm is a triumph! Million Dollar Arm recalls that glorious era when the happiest marriage in America was Walt Disney and sports! Million Dollar Arm is rated PG and still appeals to adults in totally satisfying ways! Million Dollar Arm is the only party your heart needs to attend all year long! Bring at least three tissues to Million Dollar Arm! Jon Hamm plays the sports agent JB Bernstein — the film is based on a true story — a man who’d grown weary of monolithic agencies and set out on his own in L.A. At the film’s outset, though, he’s fallen on hard times. He can’t land a major client and struggles to pay his bills while maintaining the requisite lifestyle of Porsches and supermodel sleepovers. In an effort to save his agency, he proposes a talent competition (a la American Idol) to convert cricket hurlers in India into baseball pitchers. India, he persuades a broadly stroked Chinese investor, is the final reservoir of untapped talent on the

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eat

review

sweet nothings

the shrimp and lobster rolls taste as good as they look. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

The east-side outpost of Sweet Melissa tries to live up to its west-side reputation By Douglas Trattner EastsidErs havE a habit of descending upon new restaurants like participants in a cash mob, and that’s certainly been the case at Sweet Melissa, which opened a few months back in University Heights, near the campus of John Carroll University. It’s no exaggeration to say that lines have a habit of extending clear out the front door, an issue made worse by a tiny vestibule and no-reservation policy. Those enthusiastic early adopters might very well be fans of the 6-yearold Rocky River restaurant of the same name, appreciative that the popular west-side cafe has popped up on this side of town. But as is the case with most early adopters, they are paying for their impatience. It’s no secret that the new restaurant has been weighed down by service and quality issues, problems I experienced first-hand during multiple visits. Yet I have confidence that the restaurant will improve to the point of consistent quality — after all, we need only to look out west for proof of that.

In the plus column is an eclectic menu that really does seem to have something for everybody. Like a true American bistro, the menu is a melting pot of flavors and textures, cultures and cuisines. The lengthy script is broken up into categories for starters, salads, sautéed items, grilled items, sandwiches and sides. All told, there are roughly 70 items on the menu, each appealing in description. Even better is the fact that the majority of entrees are priced between $10 and $15. Stand near the open kitchen — or sit at the small bar adjacent to it — and you’ll spot a procession of attractive plates and platters on their way to waiting diners. Some, like the bacon-wrapped meatloaf ($15), taste every bit as good as they look. The fat slab of flavorful beef is planted into a hill of whipped potatoes and smothered in wine-kissed gravy. Also as good as they look are the Roger’s shrimp and lobster rolls ($15), a pair of split-top weenie buns filled with a

the kitchen, like a server who puts in orders for starters and main courses at the same time, resulting in an overflowing table of food. Instead of patrolling the dining room, where he’d likely encounter diners begging for attention, the manager stays glued to the host stand. We were thrilled to immediately snag seats at the small bar one night, only to discover that the bartender also was waiting on a large party elsewhere in the restaurant. And some things just leave you scratching your head, like the wine list that arrives in the type of flimsy plastic sheet protector that gets inserted into a student’s three-ring binder. But even that was better than the beer list, a sheet of printer paper marked up with black and red ink marks that only our server could understand. The good news is that it’s not difficult to end on a sweet note. Sweet Melissa offers a large supply of housemade pastries, which are on display in an adjacent hall space. Do like we did and order some cheesecake ($5) and mini cupcakes ($1) to go. That way, you’ll free up your seats for the next diners.

sweet melissa 29630 John Carroll Blvd., University Heights, 216-331-3555, Melissa-rriver.com

dtrattner@clevescene.com t @dougtrattner

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

You can always count on a perfect ending. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

surprising amount of creamy seafood. Shredded veggies and spicy jalapeno wheels add welcome heat and crunch. Other dishes, like the pulled chicken tacos ($11), not only are a let down, but they’re also inaccurate. The difference between slow-cooked and pulled chicken meat versus dry grilled breast is night and day, and sadly these tacos come with the latter despite the menu description. Cold flour tortillas plus cold black bean salsa plus cold sour cream all add up to a chilly reception from our table. Eating at Sweet Melissa isn’t unlike a ride on a roller coaster; just when you’ve experienced a high, you should prepare yourself for the inevitable low that follows. The kitchen manages to cram an ocean’s worth of shellfish flavor into the hot, rich and crimson-colored lobster bisque ($5), but the King Cobb salad ($13) that followed was all show and no go. An insipid vinaigrette and that same dry grilled chicken resulted in most of that big, bright and beautiful bowl going to waste. One meal started off with a bang thanks to an unexpectedly delicious appetizer ($8). Four crispy fried rice pancakes are each topped with a cooked shrimp, a dollop of spicy marinara, and a shower of cilantro (but no scallions as promised). When I hear the phrase “brick chicken,” I conjure images of a flat, charred, butterflied whole chicken. Melissa’s “brick chicken” ($15) consists of a pair of — you guessed it — dry grilled chicken breasts. Some issues can’t be blamed on

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eat

profile

Drew AnDerson AnD Luke Visnic: kings of krAut By Beth Phillips

MAY LIVE MUSIC

• clevescene.com magazine • May 14 - 20, 2014 MAY LIVE MUSIC

O

O

There are a number of dishes and drinks that characterize Cleveland’s gastronomic culture — pierogies, corned beef and craft beer among them. Sauerkraut also should be included on that list. Until recently, the fermented food was available to local shoppers only in its more conventional form. Now, future brothers-in-law Drew Anderson and Luke Visnic are turning traditional sauerkraut upside down with their new startup venture, Cleveland Kraut. The two met when Luke began dating Drew’s sister. As the pair got to know each other, the men discovered they had something unique in common: They both enjoyed making their own sauerkraut. “One night we were hanging out, drinking some other fermented products,” says Drew. “We were sampling some of our sauerkraut and said, ‘This stuff is really good, way better than what you can find in any store.’ We started to wonder, ‘Is there a business here?’” CC L EL E HI HI So they began testing kraut VVEELL O O AAN N DD • • recipes and experimenting with ingredients to create different flavor profiles. They also did some May22-- The The Higbees Fri.,Fri., May Higbees market research, during which Sat., May33 -- Ryan Ryan Melquist they discovered that homemade Sat., May Melquist sauerkraut was seeing a resurgence May99-- The The Barflys in California. “There’s this theme Fri.,Fri., May Barflys where California will do something Sat., May 10 Brent Kirby Sat., May 10 Brent Kirby very cool with food and the nation will follow along a few years later,” Fri., May 16 Walkin’ Cane Fri., May 16 - Walkin’ Cane says Drew. “So we knew we could be Sat., May17 17 -- Kristine Jackson Sat., May Kristine Jackson on to something good.” The pair connected with & Sat.,May May 23 Fri.Fri. & Sat., 23& &2424 Cleveland Culinary Launch and began to utilize their space for - TheNew New Barleycorn - The Barleycorn production. They currently make and sell four varieties of sauerkraut; Sat., May 31 The Barflys Sat., May 31 - The Barflys Classic, Sweet Red (made with cabbage and brown sugar), Visit us on Facebook for a complete list of Visit us on Facebook for a complete list of purple Curry Kraut and Gnar Gnar (their liveentertainment, entertainment, food and drink specialsspecials live food and drink best seller). “We were experimenting 323 E. Prospect • Cleveland, Ohio 44115 • 216-781-7782 and said, ‘Let’s make a really spicy

36 323 E. Prospect • Cleveland, Ohio 44115 • 216-781-7782

one with chili flakes, habanero, hot sauce… Let’s get weird with this one,’” says Luke. “We smelled it as we were making it and said, ‘Man, this is going to be some gnarly kraut.’ We started joking around and calling it Gnar Gnar. We really didn’t expect it to work out, but it’s fantastic.” Cleveland Kraut currently can be found at North Union Farmers’ Market in Shaker Square and soon will be available at the Crocker Park location. It’s also being sold at the Cleveland Flea. The men say customer response has been great. “It’s Cleveland,” says Drew. “People know sauerkraut here. It’s part of our culture, so it’s not hard to convince people to try it. But we’re doing unpasteurized kraut and it’s full of good bacteria. So not only is our kraut tasty and different, it’s also got those great health benefits.” Luke adds, “I think that combination is really hitting a nerve with a lot of people. We’re growing faster than we ever expected.” Cleveland Kraut can be used in many non-traditional ways too. “Part of our job is to expand the realm of what people will put sauerkraut on,” says Luke. “It’s definitely not just for pork anymore.” For instance, Sweet Red makes an excellent salad topper. Gnar Gnar can take burgers to the next level. Curry kraut and ground pork in a wonton wrapper creates a quick and delicious egg roll. The men say they are planning to increase production as soon as possible. “We’re both diehard Clevelanders,” says Drew. “We want to create a great local product that can be a staple and support local jobs. There’s a special place in our heart for this city. We want Cleveland Kraut to be a part of its growth.”

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene


bites

Plans Back on Track for EasT sidE HaPPy dog By Douglas Trattner

Following the untimely death of partner Sean Kilbane, Happy Dog partners Eric Williams and Sean Watterson placed on hold their plans to open a second Happy Dog in University Circle, in the historic Euclid Tavern. “Kilbane was the heart and soul of the Happy Dog, a huge advocate for the Cleveland music scene and a great friend,” Williams said at the time. “He will be deeply missed and the Happy Dog will do its best to continue his legacy.” Well, plans are again moving forward to open an east-side location of Happy Dog, confirm the partners. Look for a late summer opening.

Cleveland Chef Currently taping ‘unnamed nationally televised food truCk raCe’

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popular Walnut Wednesday food truCk meet-up returns Walnut Wednesday returned to Perk Plaza at Chester Commons, at the intersection of Walnut Avenue and East 12th Street, on Wednesday, May 7. The 2014 Walnut Wednesday season — its fourth — runs each week through Wednesday, September 24. Food from more than a dozen of Cleveland’s best-known food trucks will be available from 11 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Live music also will be featured each week. On tap this season are Barrio Tacos, Fired Up, Krav, Nosh Box, Zydeco Bistro, Wok ’n’ Roll and Streat Mobile, to name just a few. “Walnut Wednesday has grown in popularity over the years — now more than 1,500 people visit Walnut Wednesday each week and Perk Plaza is an urban retreat all season long,” notes Joe Marinucci, president and CEO of DCA.

dtrattner@clevescene.com t @dougtrattner

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

A former and current chef at Touch Supper Club in Ohio City has quietly slipped away to compete on an “unnamed nationally televised food truck race.” All that we can divulge is that the chef’s name is Dylan, and he’s competing in a truck called Let There Be Bacon, which (spoiler alert) serves baconthemed fare. “He applied last year but didn’t make it,” explains Touch owner Rob Ivanov. “They actually reached out to him this year to compete.” The competition began in Tuscon before moving on to Austin. The team has progressed past both cities, according to the team’s tweets. Follow Dylan and his pig rig on Twitter at @LTBBacon and on Facebook to keep abreast of the action.

a fundraiser called Mixing It Up with the Dames, An Underground Evening of Craft Cocktails. Proceeds from the event, which will be held at Speakeasy in Ohio City, go to the chapter’s Green Tables Initiative, which promotes the link between farm and table. On tap for the evening are cocktails, heavy appetizers, a silent auction and cocktail demos from talented local bartenders. Molly McSweeney of Ken Stewart’s East Bank and vice-president of the United States Bartenders Guild Cleveland chapter, Lorilei Bailey of Katz Club, and Danina Calame from Velvet Tango Room will be mixing and serving signature cocktails. Tickets are $50 at cleveland. ldei.org/events.html.

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

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Music

concert preview

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Alice in Chains, oblivious to the fact that all grunge bands must wear flannel. (Photo by Johnny Buzzerio)

40

the journeymen Alice in Chains bassist Mike Inez discusses carrying on with a replacement singer By Jeff Niesel


back on it and knowing what we know now, I don’t know if we would have signed up for it, but I’m happy we did.” Last year, the group went back to the studio again. This time, it was confident that it could produce something special. The resulting album, The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here, doesn’t deviate much from previous outings. It has that Alice in Chains’ “filth,” the word founding guitarist Jerry Cantrell has used to describe their signature sound. Album opener “Hollow” features those distinctively snarling vocals and sludge-y guitars. “He’s great,” says Inez when asked about Cantrell. “He’s the real deal. There’s nothing contrived about him. He’s just Jerry and he plays. He handles it really well. He still likes playing guitar after all these years. He’s one of the best friends I’ve ever had. We’ve been through so many adventures together. He’s supportive of me and I’m supportive of him. Good things happen when we get in the studio and make a racket together. You gotta have faith in that after awhile. It’s not an easy process. You don’t see the sun for months. The studio is an unnatural place to spend your life. It’s turned into a safe place for us. We like to start jamming after all the offices have closed and people stop bugging us.” Inez, who toured with Motorhead and then Ozzy Osbourne before joining Alice in Chains, says he connects with the Seattle scene that spawned Alice in Chains even though he isn’t originally from there. “Spiritually, it’s one of my centers,” he says of Seattle. “There’s something in the water there. There’s nothing to do up there when it’s raining but go to each other’s houses and jam. Soundgarden was a band for 10 years before they got a major label deal. They were tucked away up there where bands got to percolate and marinate and define their sound before they went public. That was such a big thing. It wasn’t this cookie cutter L.A. thing where bands were getting signed. If you notice, those bands all sound different from each other. Whether it’s Nirvana or Soundgarden or Alice or Pearl Jam — even Queensryche or Jimi Hendrix or Heart. It’s a different crosscut of the wood.”

Despite the deaths (original bassist Starr passed away in 2011) and drama, Alice in Chains has carried on now for more than 25 years, no small feat in the rock world. Inez recognizes it’s a real accomplishment. “We’re very blessed and lucky to have such a long career,” says Inez. “Not just with our band. We’re like family and brothers. The bands that have any sort of longevity get along well internally. We try to keep things very simple for ourselves, whether that’s a small rehearsal space or dealing with playing stadiums with Metallica in Europe, which we’ll do after this tour. We really rely on each other. We’re just four dudes in a room making a racket. No matter what size of venue it is. That’s our default position. We can handle anything. That’s the biggest thing that I’m proud of. At the end of the day, we’re all family. That is the key to having a long legacy. And I think that if we like the music, other people tend to like it too.” That sense of commitment is hard to come by in today’s single-driven market that doesn’t encourage artist development and career-oriented musicians. Inez says the rock world is lacking the kind of creative personalities that existed back when Alice in Chains came together. “My biggest fear is that the next Kurt Cobain is out there somewhere but he won’t get into music because there’s no money in it,” says Inez. “They’re pulling arts funding. I grew up playing in marching band at school and to see that go away is really sad. I’m more concerned with the next generation. Where’s the good music going to come from? Especially when us old guys go away, who is going to play the big venues?”

Alice in chAins with Monster truck 7:30 p.m. Monday, May 19. Jacobs Pavilion at Nautica, 2014 Sycamore St., 216-861-4080. Tickets: $35-$69.50, livenation.com.

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

sidetrAcks

Alice in Chains started recording its most recent studio album, last year’s The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here, in July of 2011. The gestation period was extensive as the album’s release was delayed several times while guitarist Jerry Cantrell underwent shoulder surgery in the midst of recording. When it finally came out last year, the album was well received by fans and critics alike and received a Grammy nod for Best Engineered Album — Non Classical. Here are some of the highlights from the disc.

“breAth on the window” A straight-ahead rocker, the song has a real swagger and shows off DuVall’s powerful voice. He really howls as he sings along to a particularly bluesy Cantrell riff, showing just how in sync the two have become.

“the devil put dinosAurs here” The spooky intro almost has Goth overtones and makes the song sound like something you might hear in a haunted house. The title track’s political lyrics poke fun at creationists who think, as it’s put in the satirical lyrics, “The devil put dinosaurs here/Jesus don’t like the queer.”

“voices” DuVall sings, “Who am I/Is this me?” in this semi-acoustic ballad that recalls old Alice in Chains tunes such as “Would?” and “Rooster.” The song opens with a nice bit of distortion and then closes with an echo of that distortion.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

After originAl singer Layne Staley died in 2002, it wasn’t certain that grunge icons Alice in Chains would continue. But in 2005, the band regrouped for a benefit concert for the victims of the tsunami that struck South Asia. Guest vocalists such as Tool/A Perfect Circle’s James Maynard Keenan and Heart’s Nancy Wilson sang Staley’s parts. One of the guest singers who contributed was Comes the Fall’s William DuVall, who would eventually join the band on a permanent basis. “He’s great. He comes from such a punk background,” says bassist Mike Inez. “He’s a ninja guerilla guitar player. In his other bands, he sings and plays guitar. It was an adjustment for him. It’s not an easy job to replace someone as iconic as a Layne Staley. From where I’m standing, I look up and I see him at the edge of the stage. He puts his chin out there and gives it his all every night. He prepares more than any singer I ever jammed with.” After that benefit show, the guys embarked on a short club tour, and it wasn’t long before they were playing to huge festival crowds. As a result, they caught a serious second wind and ventured into the studio in 2005 hoping to make an album. But according to Inez, who replaced original bassist Mike Starr in 1993 when the band toured in support of his chart-topping album Dirt, there was a good deal of uncertainty about whether or not those initial recording sessions would be productive. They would eventually get it together for the resulting album, Black Gives Way to Blue, the band’s first studio effort in 14 years. But it wasn’t an easy album to record. “We went to the studio and it was like, ‘Where’s Layne?’” says Inez. “We felt like we couldn’t make a record without him. We thought, ‘If it works, it works. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t.’ We found a great producer, and we holed up at Dave Grohl’s studio. Elton John played on the record with us. It was great. Everybody was pulling for us. We needed to go through this stuff. It was our goodbye to Layne too. The only way it could work was if we faced our pain and our past and accepted an unknowing future. It’s quite the journey. Knowing what it took to get to this point and looking

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014


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Music

concert preview

all over the map

Chicago’s Robert Lamm challenged his band mates to explore new territory — and they responded

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

By Matt Wardlaw

44

When talking about a rock and roll band like Chicago that’s closing in on a half century of performing, it’s easy to assume that they’ve probably done it all. But in fact, they’re still visiting new areas as a group. Singer/songwriter Robert Lamm phoned us from a Canadian tour stop and shared that Chicago had recently played its first-ever show in Moscow, something which he called “a fantastic experience.” Playing shows globally is something that they’ve prioritized in recent years, he says, as restrictions and financial hurdles have become easier to navigate. “Eastern Europe for so many years, it was easier for the megatours, you know, the Lady Gagas of the moment, to play those markets. Of course, before the ’80s, Eastern Europe especially was pretty much shut down. Except for, I think, bands from the U.K. who were established and bands like Abba who had the international thing. They had easier access because they were closer and it wasn’t as expensive to take a whole tour there. But that’s all changed and so we play everywhere now.” Lamm, a founding member of the group, says that there are many areas, including even Canada, that were neglected to “some degree” during the ’80s and ’90s. As someone who always spoke out for change within the lyrics of his own songs, he issued a challenge to his bandmates. “It really wasn’t until I sort of threw down the gauntlet about 10 years ago and I just said to everybody, ‘Listen, if we’re not going to try to maintain a global audience, then I’m not interested in just staying in North America.’ So then we started

traveling quite a bit internationally and it’s been great. Not only in Canada, but Europe and Asia. There’s a lot of audiences there that missed us and they showed up.” Something else that’s been changing in recent years is the level of productivity within the group. While Lamm had remained quite prolific as a solo artist, the output of new material from Chicago itself had slowed down considerably. Embracing the new technology that allows them to record on the road wherever they are, whether it is the back of a tour bus or inside a hotel room, they’ve dug in deep, writing and collaborating as a band for the first time in years. Songs from Lamm that once might have been relegated to albums outside of the band are now once again finding their way to Chicago albums. He’ll have co-writing credits for six out of the 11 tracks on Now, the band’s upcoming studio album set for release on July 4. Considering that he was once one of the primary songwriters in the group, the increased volume is a welcome change for longtime fans. Lamm himself is encouraged by the contributions that came from everyone in the band. “The fact that Lee Loughnane, who doesn’t really write a lot, felt the freedom and the urge to write a song like ‘America,’ I think that’s a really great indication. Because other than Lee and the other guys in the rhythm section, in the last 20 years, there’s been a lack of interest in recording and even exploring new songs. But now that’s completely changed. There’s a lot of great stuff coming from within the band that will find

Chicago in Chicago. how clever.

their way not only onto a new album that we [will] release this summer, but [also] within six months, there will be another new album.” There was a time when releasing albums frequently was a regular part of the Chicago playbook. “Really, if you consider the very early years of Chicago, we were doing an album roughly every nine months,” he says. “So it’s not that it is undoable; it’s just that it hasn’t been part of the formula for so long. We figure as long as we can and as long as there are songs and everybody has great energy, why not do it?” Digging into his own personal writing process, Lamm chuckles and says, “I’m a slow writer just because I’ve never stopped.” He goes as far as labeling himself “kind of a contrarian and a loner in the context of this very large group.” But as he allows, his words hold a lot of influence within that group. “I guess the attitude in the band is that, ‘Well, if Robert wants to do it, let’s do it.’” Once they got down to doing it, Lamm had plenty of source material. He dug back in his own archives. “Some of the songs are ideas that never got developed,” he says. “Believe me, I have painstakingly gone through all of my old sketches. I’m telling you, like boxes of cassette tapes that you can barely hear because the tape is so old, trying to see if there’s anything in there that I missed. I’ve tossed a lot of stuff away, but I have found a couple of ideas on which to build and sort of bring into the 21st century. I continue to be

curious about other styles of music and music of other contemporary cultures. A lot of that is finding its way into the new songs.” One song was a track that he started working on for what he calls his “bossa project album.” “I was just sort of stuck on it and right about two or three years ago when Lou [Pardini] came into the band, I started working with him,” he says. “He’s an amazing musician and an amazing writer. He and I put together something that I always thought of as kind of Brazilian and when we finished it, I sent it to a couple of my Brazilian friends and they said, ‘That’s a great tune,’ but they never said, ‘Oh, how Brazilian of you’ or ‘That’s really modern bossa nova,’ which is how I was thinking about it, but it’s really not that. It’s just where that influence started for this song. So like I say, I’m all over the map with the new songs.” Lamm recalls when the group was “young and naive and had all of this energy.” When Chicago performs at Hard Rock Live, you can bet that they’ll bring plenty of that energy with them.

ChiCago 8 p.m. Tuesday, May 20, Hard Rock Live, 10777 Northfield Rd., Northfield, 330-908-7625. Tickets: $56-$110, hrrocksinonorthfieldpark.com.

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene


Music concert series high art in low places

The Cleveland Orchestra takes up residency in Lakewood

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

By Eric Gonzalez

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For many people, the concept of attending a classical music concert involves putting on fancy clothes to watch a man waving a stick at a huge group of musicians. Contrary to this, recent trends have been bringing classical programming out of the concert hall into non-traditional venues. Places like Le Poisson Rouge in New York City and the PAUSA Art House in Buffalo do a wonderful job exhibiting art music concerts in a casual bar setting. Meanwhile, the world-wide organization Classical Revolution boasts over 30 chapters around the U.S., Canada and Europe, including a Cleveland chapter that curates performances once a month at Happy Dog. The influence of Happy Dog owner Sean Watterson was key in bringing in the Cleveland Orchestra last year for an experimental weeklong residency of performances and events at unusual venues in the neighborhood. This one-of-a-kind residency was such a success that the Cleveland Orchestra is again bringing classical concerts to a public forum, this time in Lakewood from May 17 to 24. “We didn’t know what to expect last year, [but the events] encouraged appreciation from the community,” orchestra director of operations Julie Kim says about the Gordon Square residency. Kim is also the main organizer of this residency, and explained how Lakewood’s preexisting infrastructure supporting the arts make it an ideal place for the world-class ensemble to launch a larger-scale residency. “Since Lakewood spans such a large area,” she says, “there are geographical challenges involved. By covering more ground, we are able to bring the orchestra to more members of the community.”

The residency includes more than 15 free events at various locations around the near-west town, as well as a multitude of education-based events available to students of Lakewood schools. Perhaps the most unique event during the residency is the PORCHestra, happening May 18, which invites residents and businesses of Lakewood to register online so they can perform and curate concerts on their front porches. Many residents of the city are talented musically, and homeowners in the area take pride in their porches that will become beautiful music venues for an afternoon. Audiences will be able to locate the houses holding the concerts through Google Maps and are invited to attend the following concert on the front porch of the downtown Lakewood Public Library that will include the Cleveland Orchestra Youth Chorus Chamber Ensemble. “The object of the residency is to make classical music accessible to people who usually don’t get to Severance,” says Kim, and this involves pop-up shows in spaces that are part of Lakewood residents’ everyday activity. Kicking off the public concerts on the morning of May 17 are simultaneous performances at two coffee shops: There will be a solo cello performance at the Root Cafe and a woodwind duet at Blackbird Baking Company. These shows are followed by a “surprise” event at Nature’s Bin grocery store, providing unique musical experiences to people at different spots in Lakewood. On May 22, a quartet made up of strings and an oboe will perform in the Lakewood Hospital. Not all of this week’s concerts will be held in non-traditional locations. Lakewood Baptist Church

Members of the Cleveland Orchestra prep for their Lakewood invasion.

is an amazing setting for musical performances and you can hear a string quintet the morning of May 18 playing a program that emphasizes the power and persuasion of music. On May 23, you can check out a string trio at Vosh Nightclub at 6 p.m., then go see a string quartet play Mahall’s at 8 p.m. Established performance space Beck Center for the Arts focuses on non-musical performances and will hold a talk on May 19 by Cleveland Orchestra assistant conductor Brett Mitchell. Mitchell will provide enrichment and insight into the week’s events for people of any level of musical knowledge. These musicians are some of the best in the world, but that doesn’t mean their skills end on the stage. Five orchestra members will be competing with Lakewood Family YMCA youth in a kickball game that’s happening May 19, and a few members of the orchestra even cooked alongside culinary students at the Lakewood High School Ranger Cafe as part of their Celebrity Chefs program. The Cleveland Orchestra has always had a large focus on student programs and has really engaged with educators in Lakewood to bring valuable experiences to their students. Members of the orchestra have been working with the schools since mid-March on various projects like adjudicated performances, mock auditions, and an orchestral performance of Romeo and Juliet at the Civic Auditorium for students only.

The Cleveland Orchestra’s relationship with Lakewood dates back to 1920, though it’s been nearly 30 years since then-music director George Szell lead the last concert at the Civic Auditorium. It is in this concert space where current music director Franz Welser-Möst will lead the orchestra in a concert that will air on radio and television, concluding the week of public events on May 24. The program includes Richard Strauss’ masterpiece Don Juan, works by Johann Strauss Jr, and Ferdinand David’s Concertino for Trombone and Orchestra featuring soloist Massimo La Rossa. The Cleveland Orchestra gave away 1,800 tickets to this event in less than 30 minutes, and while it’s sold out, unclaimed seats will be given to non-ticket holders on the day of the performance. WVIZ will also videorecord several of the week’s events for a special program to air at a later date. All of the events during the residency are free, and sure to be interesting stand-out experiences. On the uniqueness of the project Julie Kim says, “This type of residency is very new and there is no other organization of this size programming events like this on such a large scale.” Don’t miss these world-class performances; it’s going to be a good week for classical music in Cleveland.

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene


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turn of weather. 9 p.m., $10. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. (Eric Gonzalez) Bad Boys Jam: 9 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Deleted Scenes/The Village Bicycle/ Voxcaster Aircraft: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Chris Duarte Group: 8 p.m., $15. The Winchester. Chris Hatton (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Hey Champ/French Horn Rebellion/DJ Mike Filly: 9 p.m., $10. Grog Shop. Hillbilly Idol/Cleveland Connection/ Robert Rolfe Fedderson: 6 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Journeys Featuring Robert Mark: 8 p.m., $20. Nighttown. The SteelDrivers/Honeybucket: 8 p.m., $20. Beachland Ballroom. (Niesel) Townes Van Zandt Tribute with G.S. Harper/Kate Kooser/Andrew Zeager/ Chris Hanna/Bill Lestock: 9 p.m., $5. Beachland Tavern.

fri

05/16

Incantation/Fully Consumed/ Sodomized/Forged In Gore/Cardiac Arrest/Limbsplitter/Thou Shalt Not/ Fetus Omelet/Coathanger Abortion: The world of death/black metal as we know it owes a debt to Incantation. Throughout its 25-year career, the west Pennsylvanian group undoubtedly helped define the genre in the United States. The band took established elements of death metal and expanded upon them, hitting you with riff after deadly riff and smashing it home with heavy blast-

beats. Despite a revolving door of band members, Incantation hasn’t changed its formula much over the years. The occult-inspired guttural vocals, evil guitar playing and chest-crushing drumming are still present on their latest album Vanquish and Vengance. One notable track, the epic “Legion of Dis,” is an intense dirge that juxtaposes dark smashing riffs with beautiful harmonized feedback. Bassist Chuck Sherwood has aply described the band’s mission: “Let this vortex we offer permeate and enlighten or shun and obliterate.” 7 p.m., $15. The Foundry. (Gonzalez) The Admirables: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Lou Armagno: 8:30 p.m., $10. Nighttown. Breakfast Club: 9:30 p.m. Brothers Lounge. DISCO DISCO/Graydar/Neil Chastain Trio: 10 p.m., $10. Grog Shop. George Foley: 10:30 p.m., free. Nighttown. Instrusaurus: 8 p.m., $15-$20. The Kent Stage. Carlos Jones and the P.L.U.S. Band/ Will Cheshier’s Tiny Orchestra/George Foley & Friends: 5:30 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. The People’s Temple: 9 p.m., $10. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Rebel-Yun: 9 p.m. Thirsty Cowboy. School of Rock Grad School: 7:30 p.m., $5. Beachland Tavern. The Schwartz Brothers: 9:30 p.m., $6. Beachland Tavern. Seven Sisters of Sleep/Ilsa/ Sludgethrone: 9 p.m., $8. Now That’s Class. Vintage Blue/Allen Ilg/Dallas Riffle/A

Song for Her: 9 p.m., $10. Musica. The Steve Wariner Experience: 8 p.m., $40-$100. Masonic Auditorium. Wish You Were Here: Sight and Sound of Pink Floyd: 8 p.m., $16.50-$25. House of Blues. A Work of Fiction/Little Wars/The Spectators/Home For Fall: 6:30 p.m., $6. Grog Shop. The Zapp Band: 9 p.m., $35-$80. Tangier Cabaret.

sat

05/17

Ashley Brooke Toussant EP Release/ Lowly, the Tree Ghost/Emma Shepard: 8:30 p.m., $8. Beachland Tavern. Channel 3/The Plain Dealers/Fuck You Pay Me/Zone Troopers: 9 p.m., $10. Now That’s Class. The DeVault Ridge Band: 9 p.m. Thirsty Cowboy. Diamond Dogs: David Bowie Tribute: 9 p.m., $10. The Winchester. An Evening with Dailey and Vincent: 8 p.m., $27.50. The Kent Stage. F.M./The Flavor/Tom Shaper & Friends: 6 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Instrusaurus featuring Todd Sharp and Jamey Haddad: 8:30 p.m., $20. Nighttown. Noisem/Jarhead Fertilizer/Moral Void/ Angry Gods/The Drag Hook/Wasted Blood: 7 p.m., $8. The Foundry. Nancy Redd (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. The Sadies/The Chamber Strings: 8:30 p.m., $15 ADV, $17 DOS. Beachland Ballroom. Sammy Slims/Sanchpa/Axons: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Squishfest 14: 8 p.m. Brothers

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Eric Hutchinson/Saints of Valory: Singer-songwriter Eric Hutchinson plays the kind of intelligent pop music that they just don’t make anymore. His new album, Pure Fiction, is a powerpop treat. The high-energy tunes have lent themselves to high-energy live shows. “The tour is going fantastic,” says Hutchinson. “We’ve had the best shows we’ve ever had and we’re having a great time on stage. It’s a big show and goes across all the different albums that I’ve put out. This album has really set the live show on fire. It’s 90 non-stop minutes. It’s really gratifying.” Already well-versed in the Beatles and Motown since that’s the music he heard while growing up, Hutchinson first picked up a guitar in 1995. He had already been writing songs but he taught himself to play guitar and it was a way to make his songwriter more “portable,” as he says. Self-released albums followed and then he made his way onto the majors. He’s back to self-releasing his albums, but that’s fine by him. “I have the best of both worlds,” he says. “I’m licensing my music so I have more control. My last album was delayed for a year and my mantra for this album was that the album was going to come out when I wanted it to come out.” 8 p.m., $23. House of Blues Cambridge Room. (Jeff Niesel) Ingrid Laubrock/Tom Rainey: Saxophonist/composer Ingrid Laubrock is right at home with the avant-garde. Her past few recordings range from the methodically thoughtful jazz piece “Tex and Clemente” (from Ingrid Laubrock AntiHouse), to the ambient soundscape “Glasses” (from the Ingrid Laubrock Octet’s release Züric Concert). Laubrock’s style has a sparse laidback identity that is sleepy without being boring. Her current tour is in support of And Other Desert Towns, which consists of 10 improvisations with percussionist Tom Rainey. Expect subdued, scuffling, muffled sax playing accompanied by scattered, brushed drumming on “Lost Creek,” and desolate romantic soloing on “Painted Cave.” “Summerland” is a warm reed-biting mini-explosion that should fit right in with our overdue

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music Lounge. Jackie Warren: 10:30 p.m., free. Nighttown. Who’s Bad: 8 p.m., $14-$18. Akron Civic Theatre.

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

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Lady Gaga: Pop diva Lady Gaga shamelessly borrows so much of her look and sound from Madonna, it’s a wonder the Material Girl hasn’t filed a cease-and-desist order yet. But maybe she doesn’t have to. While Gaga’s 2008 album The Fame delivered hit after hit and racked up platinum sales at a time when platinum sales were hard to come by, her latest offering Artpop has not matched the success of previous efforts, even though it arrived with a huge media blitz. Still, expect this show to be replete with costume changes and plenty of theatrics. Though heavy with tracks from Artpop, the show will also feature monster hits such as “Born This Way,” “Alejandro” and “Bad Romance.” 7:30 p.m., $35-$200. Quicken Loans Arena. (Niesel) Pusha T: You know Pusha T from the hip-hop group Clipse that he fronted with his brother in the late ’90s through the ’00s. Known for their quirky laid-back beats coupled with witty rhymes, the uncommon style of Clipse carried over to Pusha’s solo career. Released in 2010, the lackluster Fear of God mix-tape and EP series touted the almost-hit “Amen” featuring Kanye and Jeezy trading verses with Pusha over an ominous beat full of strings and bells. Now warmly embedded in Mr. West’s label, G.O.O.D. Music, the rapper’s latest album, My Name Is My Name, shows a return to form. “Pain” is a powerfully dark introspective look on the troubles of success featuring Future’s bleak vocals on the hook, and the subdued driving piano chords on “Let Me Love You” bed the bittersweet rotation between Kelly Rowland’s sultry vocals and Pusha’s confident serenading verses. It’s clear that Pusha T has prevailed through a slump in his career and we should expect to hear more firm-footed rhymes from him in the future. 7 p.m., $33. House of Blues. (Gonzalez) Tauk/Wanyama/Ness: Tauk’s 2013 fulllength debut, Homunculus, showed off a young band skilled at maneuvering

Livewire contrasting time signatures and creating exciting sonic atmospheres. The album opens with “Dead Signal,” which alternates between savvy groove and anthemic phrasings. All the music is instrumental, but there’s never a sense that anything is missing. Guitarist Matt Jalbern, in particular, is capable of forming narratives through his strings. A.C. Carter’s work on keys complements Jalbern excellently (“Hello Narwhal,” “Dirty Mouth”). In sum, Tauk lends listeners a fine dichotomy of upbeat, danceable music and chilled, electronic-leaning soundscapes. Very ambient stuff, at times. The band’s next album is due out this summer, so you can probably expect some new material to work its way into tonight’s set. 9 p.m., $8. Beachland Tavern. (Eric Sandy) Hoodie Allen: 6:30 p.m., $30. Grog Shop. (Emily Votaw) Cuyuga/Ryann Anderson Trio/Jen Maurer Project: 4 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Gorilla Music Battle of the Bands: 4 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Agora Ballroom. Hot Jazz Seven: 1 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Instrusaurus: 1 p.m., $20. Beachland Ballroom. Lee Roy Parnell/Rachel & the Beatnik Playboys: 8 p.m., $22. Beachland Ballroom. Vacation Club/Shit-Box Jimmy/Teen Vomit/Wingtones: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Phil Vassar featuring Leah Burkey: 7:30 p.m., $25-$75. Tangier Cabaret. War Master/MDFL: 9 p.m., $8. Now That’s Class.

mon 05/19 Alice in Chains/Monster Truck: 7:30 p.m., $35-$69.50. Jacobs Pavilion. Coffins/Bones/Grin and Bear It: Playing in Cleveland for one of only five shows in the U.S., Coffins is pure doom metal and comes all the way from Japan. Most recently, they put out two tracks on a split with Noothgrush, and they released their last full-length The Fleshland last year. “Drown in Revelation” features heavy drumming and a brick wall of guitar and husky, growling vocals, while “The Wretched Path” offers the same


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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Jonathan Butler

51


music only faster, angrier, and dare I say, catchier? These guys hardly ever tour the U.S., so this show is a rare treat. 8 p.m., $10. Now That’s Class. (Liz Trenholme) Steev English/Revelry: 8:30 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. The Icarus Account/Hydra Melody/ Pipe Dream/Austin Lawrence/Bare Walls: 6:30 p.m., $8 ADV, $10 DOS. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Mojo Big Band: 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Not Half Bad/Salty Boy/Beer Shits (in the Locker Room): 7:30 p.m., free. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Stone Jack Jones/Wooden Wand/ Coupler/Lylas: 8:30 p.m., $8 ADV, $10 DOS. Beachland Tavern. Velvet Voyage (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge.

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

THE STEVE WARINER EXPERIENCE Grammy Award-Winning songwriter & guitarist, 14 #1 hits, and a special tribute to Chet Atkins

Friday, May 16th: at 8 PM DON MCLEAN American Pie, Crying, And I Love You So, Vincent (Starry, Starry Night), Castles In The Air

Wednesday, June 11th at 8 PM 52

Lights by the legendary Pig Light Show

America’s Top British Invasion Show. More than just The Beatles! Your favorite British Invasion songs plus the American “responses” from The Monkees, The Turtles and more!

Friday, May 23rd at 8 PM JUST ANNOUNCED! Tickets On Sale Soon!

Saturday, August 23rd at 8 PM

TICKETS: WWW.PACCLEVELAND.COM OR CALL (216) 432-2370

Acid Mothers Temple/PERHAPS/ Obedient Skull: Acid Mothers Temple brings their iconic, trippy psych back to the Cleve tonight. Hailing from Japan, Acid Mothers Temple is touring as “Acid Mothers Temple and the Melting Paraiso U.F.O.,” and they’ll be traveling across the U.S. and Canada for the next couple months. Their latest release, Astrorgasm from the Inner Space, isn’t due out until later this month, but they’re expected to give you a preview of their new stuff tonight. Each track on the album averages about 18 minutes. The first two, “Dark Star Blues” and “Pleasure Mantra of Sorrows,” start the whole thing off with a haunting voice both sad and esoteric, set within a backdrop of spaceship noises and echoing guitar. “Kiss the Tangerine Dream House” takes on a decidedly Eastern appeal with Bollywood-like vocals and catchy a guitar riff designed to sound like a sitar. Finally, “Astrorgasm From the Inner Space” is a noise track suited perfectly as a soundscape for a launch into space as you wake up aboard some strange alien spacecraft. Together, all four tracks meld into a positively lysergic freakout. 8:30 p.m., $10. Grog Shop. (Trenholme) Brain Tumors/Bitches from Hell 3/The Drag Hook (in Club Atlantis): 10 p.m., $5. Now That’s Class. Chicago: 8 p.m., $56-$110. Hard

Livewire

Rock Rocksino. In The Round Tour with JD Eicher and the Goodnights, Charlie Oxford, Russell Howard, Zach, Allison Woods: 8 p.m., $7. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Kim Lenz & the Jaguars/Railshakers: 8:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Beachland Tavern. OutLab: Experiments in Improvised Music (in the Locker Room): 9 p.m., free. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Judith Owen/Cuda, Rosait & Cuda: 8 p.m., free. Beachland Ballroom. Lucky Peterson: $20. Nighttown. (Gonzalez) Testokra/Rat Bastard: 9 p.m., $5. Now That’s Class. Two Set Tuesday (in the Wine Bar): 6:30 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Charlie Wiener/Ruairi Hurley: 8 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern.

wed 05/21 The Flatliners/Direct Hit!/Junior Battles/Lawskof: With over a decade of cultivation behind them, the Flatliners carry a hefty reputation among Toronto’s punk scene and, more and more, all over the continent. Fans of specificity will often lump them into the “melodic hardcore” subgenre, and that’s actually a pretty fitting descriptor. Singer/guitarist Chris Cresswell angles back and forth between smooth singing and emotional screaming. Even within the same line, Cresswell will modulate enough to garner double takes from those jaded with the whole “screaming” thing. Cavalcade, released in 2010, remains a great entry point for those as yet uninitiated. 7:30 p.m., $12. Grog Shop. (Sandy) 10 X 3 Hosted by Brent Kirby (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Birthday Candles/The Heel/Jamie Horten: 8:30 p.m., $5. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Gary Hall/S. Carolina Broadcasters: 6:30 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Larchmere Porch Fest Road Show with Scarlet & the Harlots/Gato’s Gullah Gumbo/Oldboy: 8:30 p.m., $5. Beachland Tavern. Traitors/Impurity/Facing Failure/Stack the Bodies High/Demise Eve: 7 p.m., $10. The Foundry.

All the concerts you should see this week.

t @cleveland_scene


alWays oPeN For sWiMMiNg aNd caMPiNg

Festival schedule 2014 NelsoN ledges Quarry Park May 30 - JuNe 1st

Friday JuNe 13th - 15th

grateFul Fest cuMulus Party July 11-13th

4th oF July - July 6th

JoNesFest suMMer hookah July 25 - 27th July 31-august 3 est Fest august 29th-sePteMBer 1st suMMerdaNce July 19th

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

classic Fest

sPriNg BadFish!!!

53


HAVE A PICNIC, RElAx & ENjoy

NO COVER WE 5/14 9 PM EL REY’S PUPUSAS plus ALCOHOLIC HORCHATA DRINK SPECIALS FR 5/16 SEVEN SISTERS OF SLEEP / ILSA / SLUDGETHRONE SA 5/17 CHANNEL 3 / THE PLAIN DEALERS / FUCK YOU PAY ME / ZONE TROOPERS MO 5/19 COFFINS (Japan) / BONES / GRIN AND BEAR IT TU 5/20 9 PM TESTOKRA / RAT BASTARD TU 5/20 10 PM CLUB HOTLANTIS w/ BRAIN TUMORS / BITCHES FROM HELL 3 / THE DRAG HOOK WE 5/21 ALCOHOL, TOBACCO & FIREANTS COMEDY TOUR plus Daikaiju TH 5/22-5/25 HORRIBLE FEST #9 Check the website

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

band of the week

barkingspidertavern.com Thursday May 15

Robert Rolfe Fedderson 6:00pm (amer/folk) Cleveland Connection 8:00 (rock/pop/jazz) Hillbilly Idol 10:00pm (country)

Friday May 16

HESSLER STREET FAIR WEEKEND! (variety) George Foley & Friends 5:30pm (jazz) Will Cheshier’s Tiny Orchestra 8:00pm (pop/rock) Carlos Jones & PLUS Band 10:00pm (reggae)

Saturday May 17

Open Poetry w/ Ray McNiece 2:00pm (poetry) Tom Shaper & Friends 6:00pm (jazz/blues) The Flavor 8:00pm (rock/blues) F.M (Steely Dan Tribute) 10:00pm (Steely Dan)

Sunday May 18

Hot Jazz Seven 1:00pm (jazz) Jen Maurer Project 4:00pm (blues) Ryann Anderson Trio 6:00pm (jazz/funk) Cuyuga 8:00pm (folk) 11310 Juniper rd., Cleveland • 216.421.2863

54

Music

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Instrusaurus Meet the band: Todd Sharp (electric, acoustic and baritone guitars), Jamey Haddad (drums, percussion), Sean Jones (trumpet, flugelhorn), Joe Miller (trumpet), Jeff Caimpa (bass), Shea Pierre (piano/keyboard), Howard Levy (harmonica), Johnny Cochran Jr. (baritone and tenor sax), Dave Thomas (Hammond organ), Larry Galloway (trombone), Paul Christensen (saxophone), Bobby Selvaggio (alto sax and arrangements), Jay Ashby (arrangements). Straight Outta the backyard: An original member of the James Gang, Ronnie Silverman was inspired to put Instrusaurus together when he witnessed a band of veteran local musicians playing at a backyard jam session in 2004. “I had some songs that I wanted to release as a compilation — instrumental versions of classic tunes from the ’60s,” says Silverman, who put Instrusaurus together last year. Todd Sharp and Jamey Haddad were the first ones on board and then former James Gang members Jimmy Fox and Dale Peters got involved. “We just gradually put the other players together and went into the studio last year. The band quickly put together their own sound.” On the Future: If the string of upcoming live shows goes off smoothly, the guys might head back into the studio to cut another album. “There is that potential,” says Silverman.

Why yOu ShOuld hear theM: Equally capable of playing surf rock (“Pipeline”) and funk/jazz (“Watermelon Man”), these guys are incredibly eclectic. They’re at their best when they let it fly, like they do on the rollicking original tune, “Mind If I Smoke?” Great chops don’t mean much without great production, and Peters deserves a shoutout for handling those duties. He makes the whole thing sound razor sharp. Expect to hear most of the first album during the first set of this weekend’s shows. The second set will find the band jamming with its musical friends, including Fox and Peters, who’ll lead it through three James Gang tunes. Fox and Peters haven’t performed together on stage since the last James Gang reunion in 2006. The James Gang tunes will also feature horn arrangements for the first time. And the set will also feature the live debut of a tune by veteran session player Paul Christensen. Where yOu can hear theM: instrusaurus.com Where yOu can See theM: Instrusaurus performs at 8 p.m. on Thursday, May 15, at the Savannah, at 8 p.m. on Friday, May 16, at the Kent Stage, at 8:30 p.m. on Saturday, May 17, at Nighttown and at 1 p.m. on Sunday, May 18, at the Beachland Ballroom. — Jeff Niesel

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel


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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

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Music

now hear this

New souNds l o c a l

the Black keys Turn Blue

White Women

chromeo

ashley Brooke toussant

(Nonesuch) theblackkeys.com

(Big Beat/Atlantic) chromeo.net

(self-released) ashleybrooketoussantmusic.com

reCorded at suNset souNd iN Los Angeles during the summer of 2013 (with additional recording at the Key Club in Benton Harbor, Mich. and at singer-guitarist Dan Auerbach’s Easy Eye Sound in Nashville), the Black Keys’ new album presents a kinder, gentler version of the garage blues they’ve played for the past decade. The guys have been vague about the exact meaning of the title, but they’ve said it could be a reference to Cleveland late-night TV host Ghoulardi. They go for atmosphere on the dreamy album opener “Weight of Love,” a song that, despite its reverberating guitar solo, has more in common with Broken Bells than the White Stripes. It’s just one example of Dangermouse’s production. Ultimately the album comes off more as an evolution rather than a step in the wrong musical direction. — Jeff Niesel

this CaNadiaN eleCtrofuNk duo has always drawn from ’80s acts such as Hall & Oates — the Chromeo guys even collaborated with the blue-eyed soul group on a jam session in 2008. So it’s no surprise that they go back to that well on their new studio effort. “I ain’t with it,” they sing on the album’s funky opening number that features those thick, snappy bass riffs that were popular in the ’80s. The soulful “Sexy Socialiate” also owes a debt to Hall & Oates. “Come Alive,” a collaboration with Toro y Moi, brings the funk in a serious way, and “Over Your Shoulder” is just as catchy as the Daft Punk/Pharrell Williams collaboration “Get Lucky.” There’s nothing particularly deep about the tunes here but given the success of other like-minded acts, this is the right album at the right time if you’re looking for good summertime jams. — Niesel

keNt-based siNger-soNgwriter Ashley Brooke Toussant acted and sang in plays such as Guys and Dolls and Bye Bye Birdie before she embraced folkies such as Joni Mitchell and Carole King. You can hear their influence on this fine new five-song EP. “Days and Days,” a song she wrote shortly after getting married, is a love tune that shows off her beautifully brittle voice. “Jane” features a nice bit of slide guitar and soft, twangy vocals, and “Balloon” is a quiet ballad that recalls country singer Nanci Griffith, and comes off as a pretty lullaby. The EP certainly doesn’t rock but its solid songwriting suggests that Toussant is a natural; it distinguishes her from other altcountry crooners who aren’t as good at turning a phrase. — Niesel

With Regards to You

a s h l e y B r o o k e to u s s a n t p e r f o r m s w i t h L o w l y, t h e tr e e G h o s t a n d e m m a s h e p a r d a t 8 : 3 0 p . m . o n s a t u r d a y, M a y 1 7 , a t t h e B e a c h l a n d ta v e r n .

C-Notes An Akron native, singer/ songwriter/guitarist Kevin Junior formed the indie rock outfit Chamber Strings some 15 years ago in Chicago. The band’s 1999 debut Gospel Morning received rave reviews upon its release and drew comparisons to the Kinks and Big Star. Junior moved to Northeast Ohio a year ago and has assembled a new band that he’ll debut at 8:30 p.m. on Saturday, May 17, at the Beachland Ballroom when the group opens for the Sadies. “We met up through a mutual

friend and it all fell together,” says drummer Dave Swanson, who helped Junior put together the group that features local bassist Brian McCafferty, guitarist Don Depew, keyboardist Andrej Cuturic and saxophonist Marianne Friend. “Everyone is really into it. The grittier side of the music leans toward Stones and Faces and the other side leans to Burt Bacharach. It’s somewhere between those two ideologies.”

Samantha formed way back in 1983 but somehow never managed to play Pat’s, the tiny little club in the Flats that functions as working-class bar by day and hipster hangout by night. Now that the band’s recently reunited, it has booked a semisecret show there on Thursday, May 15. Self-described local “ooze” rockers Blaka Watra will open. Only 100 tickets are available. Go to deathofsamantha.com for information on how to purchase.

For Pat’s sake

Porch Party

Cleveland rockers Death of

Modeled after an annual festival

that takes place in rural New York, the Larchmere Porchfest is a terrific summer event that gives local bands a chance to play in a unique environment. In order to drum up some support for this year’s incarnation that takes place on June 21, locals Scarlet & the Harlots, Gato’s Gullah Gumbo and Oldboy perform at 8:30 p.m. on Wednesday, May 21, at the Beachland Tavern. Tickets are $5. Go to larchmereporchfest.com for more info. — Niesel

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

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magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014


magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

61


savage love

letters

hook up shook up

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

By Dan Savage

62

Dear Dan, I’m a 21-year-old straight male, and I’m mildly autistic. This means that I have difficulty picking up on social cues. I’ve recently become concerned about how it pertains to hooking up. My approach to hooking up is how I imagine most other people’s must be: find someone who I can have a flowing conversation with, attempt to flirt with them, and then awkwardly make a move. But a few weeks ago at a party, I was flirting with a girl when I suddenly realized that she was wasted. I had suspected that she was tipsy like myself, but I didn’t understand how far gone she was until she invited me outside and was unable to keep her balance while walking. What followed was a horrifyingly surreal exchange where I struggled to leave, she kept insisting that she wasn’t drunk, and all the while she kept pressing against me. By the time I got away, she was angry, people were staring, and I had history’s most shameful erection. Prior to that night, I thought I could tell when someone was too drunk. Now I have doubts about myself. Severe intoxication renders a person incapable of giving consent, and taking advantage of someone that impaired is the same as rape in my mind. Am I a rapist? Was it wrong for me to participate in hookup culture as I struggle to read social signals? Moral Blue Screen of Death

If your description of events is accurate, MBSOD, that shameful erection of yours — which was nowhere close to being history’s most shameful erection (that distinction belongs to the erections on the Catholic priest who raped the most kids) — was an innocent, unconscious, physiological response to some highly awkward and clearly unwelcome bodily contact. Just because your dick got hard doesn’t mean you were enjoying yourself. Again, if your recap is accurate: You were struggling to leave, and this drunk wouldn’t stop pressing her

body against yours? You were the victim, not the perp. As for other women you’ve hooked up with at or after parties… The line between buzzed enough to go for it and too drunk to consent can be fuzzy and subjective. Some people argue that one drink renders a person incapable of consenting to sex. By that standard, nearly all of us are guilty of raping scores of people. (By that standard, millions of sexual encounters are simultaneous rapes, i.e., two tipsy/buzzed/drunk people having sex that neither party was capable of consenting to.) But sensible people recognize that alcohol functions as a social lubricant and an effective way to overcome social or sexual inhibitions, and that it’s possible for two people (or more!) to have consensual sex after a drink or two or even three. I’m sorry to say that it’s possible you hooked up with a girl who was completely shitfaced but, unlike that drunk girl at the party, was not giving off too-shitfaced-to-consent cues that you could pick up on. Since you can’t go back in time, you can only resolve to be more cautious going forward. You’re going to ask a friend for his or her read on the girl you met, or — better still — you’re going to stick to dance-floor make-out sessions at parties and reserve getting naked for sober/soberer second or third dates. And when you do decide to really go for it, you’re going to err on the side of making active, ongoing, explicit requests for consent, i.e., you’re not going to “make moves,” awkward or otherwise, you’re going to ask questions (“I’d really like to kiss you — that okay?”) and keep asking questions (“Okay, I got the condoms out — you still wanna fuck?”).

On the Lovecast, Dan chats with filmmaker David Thorpe about gay voices: savagelovecast.com.

mail@savagelove.com t @fakedansavage


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MEET GAY & BI LOCALS Browse & Respond FREE! 216-912-6000

Jonesin’ Crossword

MEET LOCAL SINGLES FREE!

“Get Back”-return to what you know. Matt Jones

1-708-613-2100 Normal LD Applies 18+

SEXY HOT SWINGER’S LINE! 1-800-785-2833 1-800-960-4328 EROTIC PLAYGROUND! 1-888-660-4446 1-800-990-9377 HOT LIVE SEXY CHAT!!! 1-888-404-3330 1-800-805-8255 18+

Find your happy hour.

WHERE SINGLES MEET

Download the official SCENE happy hour app today!

Listen to Ads & Reply FREE! 216-912-2222 FREE Code 3228, 18+

ACROSS

DOwn 1 Home of The Ringling Circus Museum 2 Go-getter 3 Waiting room query 4 DOS component? 5 Fictional typing tutor ___ Beacon 6 Latin list ender 7 Sound off 8 Lindros formerly of the NHL 9 Mandrill kin 10 Newsgroup system since 1980 11 Game with 32 pieces 14 Encyclopedia Brown’s hometown 15 Italian word for “milk”

20 2000 Subway Series losers 21 Hinduism, for example: abbr. 23 Hang out 26 Bristly brand 27 Like some congestion 28 Greta Garbo, for one 30 Suave 33 Reactions to fireworks 34 Shooting/skiing event 35 Available, as fruit 36 Series with an upcoming Episode VII 38 Ballerina’s bend 39 Teahouse hostess 40 Former Attorney General ___ Clark 41 First name on the Supreme Court 42 Robertson of CNN 44 Hidden loot 45 A great many 47 Get ready 48 Yemen’s largest city 49 Pac-12 team since 2011 53 Longtime Pet Shop Boys record label ©2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor jonesincrosswords.com)

Answers appear on page 66

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Your premier choice for classy & fun entertainment providing first-rate entertainment for all occasion, including a wet & wild bachelor parties, divorce parties, birthday celebrations & retirement parties! Whatever the reason is that you request our services, rest assured that we have what you’re looking for! Our carefully selected adorable playmates cater to any occasion! We offer a diverse selection of exotic, classy, sophisticated & gorgeous ladies for you to choose from.

1 Woodshop tools 5 Dish (out) 9 Florida fullback, for short 12 Fluish, perhaps 13 “Space Invaders” company 15 Mascara’s target 16 Campus letters 17 Convincing 18 “... butterfly, sting like ___” 19 “___ for Alibi” (Grafton novel) 20 Places for missing persons reports 22 “And I’ve got one, two, three, four, five ___ working overtime” (XTC lyric) 24 Nixes a bill 25 1980 running medalist Steve 26 Unobtrusive, as a ringtone setting 29 It’s heard in Houston 31 Affected 32 It may hold up an Arp 33 Sapporo sashes 37 One end of a fencing sword 39 1968 Winter Olympics site 43 ___ apso

44 Lock up tight 45 Convent-ional title? 46 Item exhumed years after burial 50 Hem’s partner 51 Part of NCAA 52 Like mad callers 53 “Born Free” lioness 54 Queens diamond, once 55 Take on more issues? 56 Othello, for example 57 Allergy source 58 QB play 59 Roadside rest stops

65


HOME BUYERS!!!

FREE MONEY!!! DOWN PAYMENT PROGRAM*

BUY YOUR DREAM HOME!!! Plus Get Up To $100k + More* (for new kitchen, new roof, new carpet, appliances, paint, basement waterproofing, windows, heating & cooling)*

NEVER EVER EVER BEEN A BETTER TIME TO BUY A HOME!!! Great Low Fixed Interest Rates* When your dreams come true... our dreams come true!!!

440.342.7355 (SELL) To Buy...or Sell

Call Grizzell *Some restrictions may apply *for those who qualify... we consider...

good credit • bad credit • bankruptcy

Transportation Services $300 & UP FOR ALL JUNK CARS

We pay cash for junk or unwanted cars. We tow them for free! 440-231-8114 Rich

***$350 & UP***

FOR ALL JUNK CARS. 216-322-0920

Merchandise For Sale BIG FUN

Cleveland’s Best Toy Store. Cash for Old Toys, Legos Star Wars, GI Joes, Transformers, Hot Wheels, NINTENDO, Action Figs Rock Concert T-shirts 1814 Coventry Rd. Cleve Hts. 216.371.4386 or 11512 Cliffton Blvd Cleve/Lake 216.631.4386 We Pay Top $$$ For Old Toys! www.bigfunbigfun.com

BUYING PINBALL MACHINES

Jukeboxes, older slot machines, & older coin operated arcade type machines (working or not) 440-823-4057

GROW IN LESS SPACE

I COLLECT

VertiGrow stackable pots. Great for most plants. Used $1 each, min. 100 New $3 each, min. 50 440-834-0696

naked pictures of ELIZABETH TAYLOR & DONNA DOUGLAS 216-296-6378

Professional Services ATTORNEY *216.771.3966

Learn To Play Perfect Blackjack Strategy! Free 1st Lesson! Call 330-813-8808

DUI/DUS/Criminal/Divorce Bankruptcy. DEBT RELIEF AGENCY. 1st appt FREE! Payment plans. Call Jason Baker

AUTO INSURANCE

SR22/Bond BEST PRICES DAVID YOUNG INSURANCE 440-779-9800

CRIMINAL DEFENSE

(DUI, Misdemeanor & Felony) Former Prosecutor Now Fighting For You. Also representing PERSONAL INJURY victim. Attorney David Reuven Office:216-360-3000 Cell:216-338-8666

HERPES SUFFERER Pen pals needed. Write PO BOX 391372 Solon, OH 44139

STOP LOOSING SLOTS!

UNCONTESTED DIVORCE $195 Plus Filing Fee, Attorney 216-.621.4100

Help Wanted

TIRED OF SELLING MORE & EARNING LESS? IES is an authorized agent for one of the largest energy suppliers in America. Sales Pros and Managers needed for an exciting duel fuel (natural gas & electricity) campaign. If you want to work independently, run a crew, or run an office the sky is the limit. Call 216-374-4651 or submit your resume to: mlogan@internationalenergysolutions1.com

Massage - Certified CARING MASSAGE

Days & Evenings, weekends. Warm candlelight atmosphere. Lakewood/West Suburbs Linda 216-221-5935

THE MAILMAN

Delivering The Best Massage! Call 216-252-3652 216-776-2702

Builletin Board

WANTS TO PURCHASE

minerals and other oil & gas interests. Send details P.O. Box 13557, Denver, CO 80201

Professional Services

THE OCEAN CORP. 10840 Rockley Road, Houston, Texas 77099. Train for a New Career. *Underwater Welder. *Commercial Diver. *NDT/Weld Inspector. Job Placement Assistance. Financial Aid available for those who qualify. 800-321-0298.

Help Wanted EXPEIRIENCED TATTOO ARTIST

Wanted for Tattoo Cafe. 216-965-8882

Puzzle appears on page 65

magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

Help Wanted Federal Machinery and Equipment Company is looking for a mechanic with a strong background in rebuilding industrial machinery. Strong plus includes skills in welding, hydraulics, and electrical. Candidate must have current drivers licenses and be able to pass a routine drug screen. Competitive compensation package includes benefits such as health insurance, 401k, paid holidays, and earned vacation. Interested candidates should send their resume to

2003 JEEP LIBERTY, 1J4GL48K03W711437, MILES: 112,114 EBAY DATE: 5/19/2014; 2006 SCION TC, JTKDE177360104723, MILES: 149,909 EBAY DATE: 5/19/2014; 2007 PONTIAC G6, 1G2ZG58B274127927, MILES: 116,149 EBAY DATE: 5/19/2014; 2002 INFINITI I35, JNKDA31AX2T031148, MILES: 140,695 EBAY DATE: 5/22/2014; 2006 SATURN ION, 1G8AJ58F26Z180653, MILES: 100,000 EBAY DATE: 5/22/2014; 2004 CHRYSLER SEBRING, 1C3EL45X74N380784, MILES: 113,231 EBAY DATE: 5/23/2014; 2006 MERCURY MARINER, 4M2YU57Z06KJ00907, MILES: 100,338 EBAY DATE: 5/23/2014

2002 CHEVY CAVALIER, 1G1JF524127273709, MILES: 141,149 EBAY DATE: 5/19/2014

66

Federal equipment Company

©2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com)

PO Box 605100, Cleveland, Ohio 44127 or email to mechanic@usedprocessingequipment.com


magazine • clevescene.com • May 14 - 20, 2014

67


Enjoy Responsibly

© 2014 Shock Top Brewing Co., Shock Top® Honeycrisp Apple Wheat Ale, St. Louis, MO

Brand: Shock Top Item #: PST201410572 Job/Order #: 260845

Closing Date: 3/19/14 QC: CS

Publication: Scene Weekly

Trim: 9" x 11" Bleed: none Live: 8.5" x 10.5"

May 14, 2014  
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