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Mr Perski’s

Shambala 2009

FOT FESTIVAL OBJECT TRADING PRODUCTS EVENTS AND SERVICES

DEAL OF THE DAY! LIMITED EDITION FORKED BRANCH WOODBURNER – ONLY 200 000 FOT! (CURRENTLY NOT IN STOCK)


The FOT Exchange Rate Mechanism - Five Simple Steps To Success! 1. Bring an object of your choice to FOT. 2. We will then break this object – before reassembling it with a variety of sealants, adhesives and tapes. 3. We will then return this object to you with a value attached to it (I.e. 5000 FOT). 4. You use this object to purchase FOT Products, Events and Services. 5. We then sell these used items of currency late at night to people under the influence.

FOT - YOUR ONE STOP FESTIVAL SHOP! EVERY PRODUCT, SERVICE AND EVENT YOU COULD EVER WANT AT A FESTIVAL UNDER ONE ROOF!


FOT! Â A classic and enduring logo: FOT Mascot Jim the Giraffe licking a stamp.

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BESTSELLERS! Mate-Peg

Is your mate a little worse for wear? Yes? USE A MATE-PEG NOW. Simply put the peg in the ground and tie your mate to it. You can go off and enjoy the festival safe in the knowledge that your mate will be bothering no one but themselves.

FOT Alarm Service

Successful waking up in three easy steps: (1) pick up a FOT alarm flag from the FOT stall; (2) tell us when you want waking up; (3) place the flag on or near your tent. We guarantee to wake you up no later than Tuesday September 1stÂ


In no particular order, below is an un-exhaustive list of the products, events and services we offer: 1. Found and Lost Service 2. Festival Measuring Services 3. Mate Auctioneer Service 4. Flash Photography Shadow Service 5. Festival Queuing Service 6. FOT SWOP! 7. Festival Accounting Service 8. Festival Car Hire (Magarra Motors) 9. Festival Decorating 10. Festival Alarm Service 11. Festival Immigration Advice 12. Festival Dating Agency 13. Festival ladder Services 14. Festival Loans 15. Festival Escort Agency 16. Festival Mortgages 17. Festival Patenting Advice 18. Trading Standards Service 19. Festival Air Conditioning 20. Festival Sleep Service 21. Bespoke Gluing Service 22. Festival Aromatherapy 23. Festival Breaking Service 24. Festival Handwriting Analysis 25. Stamp Licking Service 26. Festival Hypnotherapy 27. Festival Bailiff Service 28. Festival Bed & Breakfast 29. Instantly Fading Portraiture 30. Festival Drug Counseling 31. FOT Private Investigation 32. Tent Locksmithing Service 33. Festival Glazing 34. Festival Debt Advice 35. Festival Bailiff Service        


36. Sign Writing Services 37. Entourage Services 38. Festival Cash and Carry 39. FOT FOOD! 40. Festival Property Development 41. Festival Engraving 42. Festival Courier Services 43. Festival Medical Services 44. Plastic Surgery (includes breast enlargement) 45. Festival Legal Advice 46. FOT Laser Eye Surgery 47. Festival Clairvoyancy 48. Festival Wedding Services 49. Festival Following Service 50. FOT Permaculture (Instant-ish Haircuts) 51. Festival Pest Control 52. Festival Roofing Services 53. Festival Stockbroking Services 54. Festival Homogenised Betting Division 55. Bakhtinian Linguistic Services (incorporating Rhyming Slang Exchange) 56. Digital Library Services 57. Festival Orienteering Services 58. Festival Dental Services 59. Festival Weather Services 60. Festival Séance Services 61. Festival Pawn Broking 62. Festival Homeopathy 63. Festival Sewing Service 64. Self Portrait with Sombrero Service 65. Festival Sideways Ladder Service 66. Festival Tree Stump Service 67. Falling Photography Services 68. Mate Peg 69. Night-time Mate Peg 70. Tan Productive Sunglasses 71. Pre Dampened Rizla 72. Lovers Cigarettes 73. Pre-Smashed Celebration Plates 74. Penalty Spots 75. FOT Highs.  


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FESTIVAL VEHICLE HIRE!

Our very own second hand used car dealer Mr Mogarra will be on hand if you wanted to purchase a vehicle for the festival. The range of models available can be viewed above.


CREATE YOUR OWN ECONOMY

FOT Information  

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