D U R B A N ’ S
b e s t
g u i d e
f o r
p ar e n t s
a season or a lifetime why all your child’s friendships have their place
keep up the good work
it’s time for mom and dad
ways to reconnect with your partner
ensuring your child’s mind is stimulated during the holiday
Are you a New Age parent? At Sunday lunch, my mom and aunt, both in their late seventies, referred to their children (I was the only one present), as “these New Age parents”. I was surprised. Firstly, it’s an old, rather hackneyed term and, secondly, what does it really mean nowadays anyway? They carried on chatting and as they hadn’t seen each other for months, I didn’t interrupt. Perhaps what the wise sisters were really referring to is the evolving and seemingly more challenging role parents are being asked to play, in what really is a new age. With the official unemployment figure at 25 percent, and the unofficial one galloping beyond 40 percent, we certainly need a new plan of action: how do we raise happy, healthy, environmentally friendly, really employable children, who are not completely stressed out? I often feel overwhelmed as I watch my children grow up, constantly stressing about school and sport. But when I actually sit back and look at their lives, I see a huge, ever-present safety net – their circle of friends. On page 16 we look at your child and the role their friends play in their lives. These friendships can give them what they really need to get where they are going: the fun and games, the love and the laughter, the shoulder to cry on and, so often, the confidence to conquer. While we strive to do all we can to love and protect our children, it may very well be their friends who carry them where we can’t. So let’s encourage childhood friendships and do what we can to help them grow. Wishing all dads a happy Father’s Day on 17 June.
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a note from lisa
6 over to you
Duster Moyo explains why he went on a techno diet
features 16 helping friendships grow
9 all systems down
lynis Horning explores the G importance of friends in your child’s life
does your child suffer from recurring infections? It might be primary immunodeficiency disease. Ruwaydah Lillah explains
regulars 7 wins 10 upfront with paul
the more time children spend outdoors, the happier they are, says Paul Kerton 12 best for baby – special delivery
Donna Cobban looks at the birthing options for your second or third baby
20 keep them learning
14 dealing with difference
Sameerah Karolia suggests ways to keep children mentally stimulated over the holidays
Asperger’s syndrome is an autism spectrum disorder, but how do we identify it? Lisa Lazarus finds out
22 warm the soul
24 resource – romance me
celebrity chef Jenny Morris shares recipes for Father’s Day from her book Cooking with Jenny Morris
it’s time to reconnect with your partner. Compiled by Tamlyn Vincent
27 a good read
new books for the whole family
28 what’s on in june 34 finishing touch moving house is not for the faint hearted, but Anél Lewis has done it twice, and while heavily pregnant
classified ads 29 family marketplace 32 let’s party
this month’s cover images are supplied by:
over to you shot or not
from our website Comments on the article “overcoming the challenges of bed-wetting” My son is almost eight years old and a bedwetter. I have tried tablets that produce the “antidiuretic hormone” twice and the bedwetting alarm, but nothing worked. After 6pm in the evening my son is not allowed any fluids and he still sometimes wets his bed. Are there any solutions? – Anonymous In my experience as a therapist, children who bed-wet are experiencing some form of emotional stress. If one can pinpoint what this is and help a child to acknowledge what they are feeling and support them with love, understanding and care, the bed-wetting will stop almost immediately. Craniosacral therapy is also very helpful for children with bed-wetting woes. – Sam We had our son checked for bladder issues, used medication, and used the alarm. The alarm had the best results in our case. – Heinrich As a child who wet his bed until almost the age of 13, due to various levels of anxiety, I know how they feel and can say that it will pass. – Anonymous
I am commenting on the article “give them a shot” (April 2012). As a healthcare professional and mother I would have preferred to see both sides of the vaccination debate presented to give me a balanced start to investigating this controversial topic. A good site for vaccines is nvic.org as it is neither for nor against vaccination. It would be great if any subject relating to health and children has medical, homoeopathic and any other related research presented. Siobhan Wilcox
safety of playgrounds I would like to appeal to all who offer play facilities to ensure that safety checks are done on a regular basis and that the play equipment and surrounding areas are safe. I often see moms sitting and chatting with friends while children as young as 18 months are left unattended to climb and explore playground equipment that is not suitable for their age group. Should one of these children fall they might be left with a brain injury or broken limbs. I acknowledge that children need to explore their surroundings, but it should be in a controlled, safe environment, which has age-appropriate equipment. In most establishments I have noticed that there are no padded safety mats and should the child fall it is either onto hard soil or concrete. I would also appeal to them to ensure that there are no strangulation hazards. Concerned mom
more on ADHD medication And more... Is there a way to find out about open days at schools? I know they often advertise this information in your magazine. – Wendy Childmag says... See our online and magazine “what’s on” sections for open days. I am a Grade R teacher and Gran, and would like to know how we go about getting your magazine circulated at our primary school? – Linda Kok Childmag says... For subscriptions to the magazine or to be added to our distribution waiting list, you can contact Helen Xavier via email at firstname.lastname@example.org
I am a teacher and it really upsets me when people state that we (teachers) immediately push parents to put their children on Ritalin without giving them other options. In the years that I have been teaching, I have taught quite a few children that in my opinion as a teacher have had ADD/ADHD. In all of these cases I have called the parents in and we have discussed our options. Teachers cannot diagnose ADHD. The only thing that we can do is recommend that parents get their children assessed by an educational psychologist. Teachers are also not legally allowed to prescribe medication. I don’t agree that Ritalin is the only choice. I always suggest that parents change their children’s diets, increase their exercise and limit their TV time. I encourage them to visit their GP who can help them
with alternatives and if this fails, I suggest they look at medication. I have seen success with low doses of Ritalin given during school time and it made a huge difference to those children, but it is not for everyone. People sometimes don’t understand that teachers have 30-plus children to educate and the other children have problems too. We try our best with the resources we have and I always put the needs of the children in my class first. Anonymous
the worldwide club I was trying to get my one-year-old daughter to sleep. She was teething and she complained the whole day. It was her third or fourth day with the same level of discomfort. I was exhausted. At some point I was rocking her on the balcony. It was hot and the fresh air helped to relax her. I was so tired. My arms, back and knees were in pain from so many hours with her in my arms without a minute of silence, trying to do everything with a single hand. I felt helpless and frustrated. What else could I do? Then I thought: how many other women are at this precise moment doing exactly what I’m doing? Millions of mothers must be in the same position as me. I felt so much better. I was not alone. I imagined a connection between us, like small lamps flashing all over the world. Thanks to all the mothers for being moms. Nuria Vidal Galiano Follow us on twitter.com/ChildMag and facebook.com/childmag.co.za
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giveaways in june vintage fashion Sticky Fudge is a place where childhood never goes out of fashion. Timeless cotton garments turn back the clock to when sticky hands were part of the fun. Clothes are specifically designed to be combined with each other and there are various ranges to choose from, allowing you to create a unique, layered wardrobe for your child. Sizes are available from newborn to four years at selected and exclusive stockists. This winter, spoil dad with the limited Sticky Fudge Dad and Me Designer Sweatshirt Combo, available in four colours, five adult sizes and children’s sizes up to age seven. Contact: email@example.com or visit sticky-fudge.com or facebook.com/StickyFudgeClothing Four readers stand a chance to each win a Sticky Fudge winter wardrobe to the value of R2 500. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-dbn and use the code “Sticky Fudge DBN”. Your details will be made available to Sticky Fudge.
say goodbye to winter colds
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SupaChewz is a new children’s multivitamin that delivers high quality nutrients for growing minds and bodies and helps boost the immune system. The strawberry chew tablet contains 12 vitamins and 12mg elemental of chelated zinc, with no aspartame, artificial sweeteners, sugar, gluten, lactose or colourants. Contact: info@arctichealth. co.za or visit arctichealth.co.za Twenty-five readers stand a chance to each win a month’s supply of SupaChewz, valued at R80,95. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-dbn and use the code “SupaChewz DBN”. Your details will be made available to Arctic Health.
to enter simply visit childmag.co.za
congratulations to our April winners Sheena Roux and Louis Onody who each wins a hamper, including a Krooom bookcase and a large mural
cutouts from Coral Moon and Robyn Maree who wins a large or post your entry to PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010. Entries close 30 June 2012. Only one entry per reader.
Bloc Stor and BlocTop.
a digital diet Techno-dependent father DUSTER MOYO and his daughter learn
y eight-year-old daughter suffers from night terrors and will see imaginary vampires when I walk into her room to close the curtains. When I recently walked into her room to console her while she was having one of her nightmares, she yelled, “Dad, switch off your Blackberry!” That was a turning point for me; making me realise that technology has taken over our lives. Our children text, email and tweet as if they are training for the Olympics, and they must improve their speed daily to make the grade. Yet despite our virtual and boundless digital connections with people, many of us feel overwhelmed and isolated, unsure of how to interact normally with our children. We blame Xboxes, PlayStations, smartphones, tablet computers and laptops for stealing us away from our children, things we love and people in general, but we are really our own worst enemies. Do a quick census
of your digital life with the following questions: 1) Do you allow your child to parry questions about her school maths project while she fiddles on her smartphone? 2) Do you find yourself checking your LinkedIn profile or reading documents on Google while your daughter complains about her violin lessons? 3) Do you or your children feel that something has only really happened once they have shared it with their peers on MXit? and 4) Does your child get restless if his data airtime is up and he can’t go online? If you answered yes to any of these, then you are not alone. I too have lost contact with my children and people around me. We no longer have anything meaningful to say to each other when we are offline and in each other’s presence. So I sought the help of a psychologist to reclaim my relationship with my daughter. She drew up a three-step digital diet, starting with a detox. My daughter had to spend three days of the week without her laptop or smartphone, to rediscover herself, and her relationship with me. Then my daughter’s “virtual weight index” was calculated using a formula that measures how much she is weighed down by her use of gadgets and social networks to communicate. She was told that unless she
cut down on her use of technology, she would suffer from “digital obesity”. Our psychologist also showed us techniques beyond the hazy social networks that we can use to improve our relationship. I set up dates and timetables of when she could be online to answer friends’ tweets, reply to emails or search for information. This showed her that technology should be an aid and not an obsession. I encouraged her to re-establish friendships by walking to friends’ houses instead of just “liking” their Facebook profiles. For the first time in a while, she is rediscovering the art of conversation. With technology absent from the dinner table, she no longer almost loses her head in the salad bowl when she battles a cheating player in an online game. The digital diet has given us a healthy approach to technology, and improved our father-daughter relationship. Moyo is a scriptwriter and a proud father of one.
Readers, this is your column – it’s a space to air your views, share a valuable parenting lesson, vent your frustrations or celebrate your joys. Send your writing to firstname.lastname@example.org
how to drop their virtual weight and reclaim their relationship.
all systems down Does your “sickly child” suffer from recurring infections and illnesses? He may have a primary immunodeficiency
hen a recurrent chest infection refused to yield to an aggressive dose of antibiotics and nebuliser treatments, Pietermaritzburg nurse Cally Coldbeck realised something was wrong with her usually vivacious daughter, Megan. Days before the infection, Megan was a normal nine-year-old, climbing trees and playing with the animals on a friend’s farm in the Drakensberg. But a seemingly harmless infection quickly turned her into a shadow of her former bubbly self. “Her weight dropped and she slept all day without getting any better. We watched this energetic “firefly” waste away in front of our eyes.” After a series of tests, Meg, now 13, was diagnosed with a primary immunodeficiency disease (PID).
what is PID? When a part of the immune system is missing, or does not work properly, the
disease, says RUWAYDAH LILLAH. body can’t get rid of germs or protect itself from new germs. This means that sufferers are more vulnerable to infections and struggle to shake off even the slightest germ. PID sufferers may experience autoimmune problems, where the immune system mistakenly attacks the body’s organs and tissues instead of germs and other disease-causing agents. Most primary immunodeficiencies are genetic disorders and there are over 150 types, many of which go undiagnosed. They vary in severity, with some being so mild that they may go unnoticed for years. More severe cases will usually be picked up soon after birth.
what are the symptoms? Dr Monika Esser, Head of National Health Laboratory Systems at Tygerberg Hospital and the Immunology Unit at Stellenbosch University, cautions parents not to panic and put every sniffle down to PID. To find
out if your child is at risk, she recommends you use the “spur” indicator, an acronym for severe, persistent, unexplained and recurrent infections, while also being aware of 10 warning signs. “Concerned parents should consult a doctor or clinic nurse,” advises Esser. Your child may be at risk if she has: • eight or more ear infections a year; • two or more serious sinus infections a year; • spent two or more months ineffectively on antibiotics; • two or more bouts of pneumonia per year; • recurrent deep skin or organ abscesses; • persistent mouth or skin thrush after the age of seven; • n eeded intravenous antibiotics to clear infections; • two or more deep-seated infections, such as meningitis, sepsis, cellulitis, or osteomyelitis; and • a family history of PID.
Stunted growth in infants may also be a warning sign.
is there a cure? Certain forms of severe combined immune deficiency and an increasing number of PIDs, even chronic granulomatous disease, can be cured by a successful bone marrow or a cord blood transplant, says Esser. “An early diagnosis is important, before irreversible organ damage occurs.” She adds that gene therapy holds some promise for curing PIDs, although the later onset of cancers is a problem. More common antibody deficiencies are usually treatable with immunoglobulin, antibiotics and vaccinations.
where to get help PiNSA has a national helpline exclusively for PID patients. Contact Joy Rosario: 082 365 4663, email@example.com or visit pinsa.org.za
upfront with paul
get out there If you want to teach your children well, start spending more of your weekend
grew up in Ilkley, a lovely, safe Yorkshire town, which had a dangerously fastflowing river surrounded by craggy hills, gushing streams and giant rocks. I climbed trees to the very top – often with some very hairy moments getting down, I clambered up and over rocks and I’d take my bike with the thickest tyres over the roughest forest trails, years before they invented mountain bikes. We’d sail down river in car tyres, being careful to negotiate the killer rapids, and we’d play football in the park for days. In winter I went ice-skating on the small frozen lake, sometimes falling through the thinner ice, and when it snowed I took my toboggan and challenged my friends to the steepest, longest, most dangerous slopes. There were no cellphones or computer games, no Facebook and not much on TV, but I was happy and roamed free. Nobody – not parents, teachers, social workers or the police, bothered me and nobody said the word “don’t”. My mother
Saskia, Paul and Sabina
simply asked if I had a vest on, adding, “be careful, and be back in time for dinner”. Play is often described by those in the know as “the work of children” in that without play children do not develop the physical and mental skills necessary to survive to a basic standard. The hope is that growing children will develop strong bones and good muscle tone, and an alert and curious mind bursting with imagination. These days, however, there seem to be an awful lot of people saying “don’t” and the
act of play is fast becoming a political football booted from one lobby group to another, which could either improve or restrict a child’s development and happiness. There has been a rash of child surveys recently done by important, concerned and influential bodies, institutions and corporations, and numerous pressure groups. They conclude that: 1) Children are getting fatter faster than ever before. 2) Their bodies are weak to the point that, 3) they cannot endure
simple exercise, like running. This is because, 4) they are spending too much time indoors or on the couch in front of a screen. 5) Parents don’t spend enough time playing with their children because, 6) they feel guilty for not working or not doing domestic chores. 7) Child’s play is deemed either too dangerous or not dangerous enough, depending on which group you believe, and 8), children are generally unhappy compared to children of 15 years ago. 9) Out of 21 “rich” western countries, UK children are the “unhappiest” children, while 10), the Netherlands has the happiest children with Scandinavian countries runners-up. (South Africa didn’t feature). Now in the UK parents need to seek planning permission to “erect” a jungle gym and are advised to take an “’elf and safety course (250 quid!)” to learn how to supervise their child on it. Please, let’s not go there… Paul Kerton is the author of Fab Dad 2: From Walking to Talking (... and Beyond).
PHOTOGRAPH: MARIETTE BARKHUIZEN
outdoors – they’ll be happier for it, and so will you, says PAUL KERTON.
best for baby
special delivery Often women don’t have the birth they envisioned, so when the time comes to prepare for a second or third baby, it’s helpful to know what the options are. By DONNA COBBAN
had a Caesarean section. I held out for a natural delivery, but in the last week I developed cholestasis of pregnancy, a liver disorder with implications for the baby’s health, and the decision was made for me. “We’ll do it on Tuesday. Come in for a prep talk on Monday,” I was told. “But I want the baby to decide when he will be born, so let’s do it once I go into labour,” was my response. “But then you might have to get us all up in the middle of the night,” was the retort. Being the wimp I often am, I just mumbled, “Oh okay” and made my appointment. Then on Sunday at about midnight labour began and the next morning, at 8:02am, my son was born via C-section, on the day he chose. I felt I had won a small victory. But were I to do it again, I would do things differently. At that time, I knew no one who had used a midwife and I barely knew what a doula was.
This can take place in a hospital or clinic with your gynaecologist/obstetrician, at a birth centre with a midwife or doula or even at your own home. Many hospitals now have birthing rooms or suites, which may include a bath, music and a double bed, where the partner can sleep over. Water births are gaining popularity, but they need careful planning as equipment needs to be booked well in advance. Medically there are mixed feelings as to delivering a baby under water – the pros and cons of which would need to be discussed with your medical practitioner.
pain relief in natural birth Dr Linda Walmesly, an obstetrician/gynaecologist at Groote Schuur Hospital in Cape Town, says pethidine and morphine are commonly used drugs in natural labour. These are given via injection to the mother preferably four hours before delivery. The antidote nalaxone is administered to the baby if there is a slow response postdelivery or if the mother received medication shortly before the birth. Entonox or nitrous oxide, otherwise known
as laughing gas, can be inhaled during and just before contractions for some pain relief. The most comprehensive form of pain relief would be an epidural, which is an injection of local anaesthetic via a small catheter into the space surrounding the spinal cord. It is an invasive procedure and is performed by an anaesthetist. It can be given in such a way that the mother can still walk around. Other methods include transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation, or Tens, which provides a non-invasive, lowrisk nerve stimulation that may help with pain; acupuncture; lying in a warm bath; soothing music and hypnobirthing
twenty-one The percentage of births in South Africa in 2003 that were by Caesarean section as reported by the World Health Organisation. The WHO standard is not more than 10 to 15 percent.
types of births
and the use of relaxation techniques to diminish fear and help your body deliver naturally.
caesarean section South Africa, it seems, is fast following countries where fear, insurance and litigation have become major players in the birthing game and healthcare practitioners appear more reluctant to take any risks. According to a 2011 paper in the South African Medical Journal, “reasons for requesting a C-section include fears of labour and delivery, also known as tocophobia, convenience, control, and the preservation of pelvic floor function”. Many women also opt for an elective Caesarean as they can choose the date and time of the birth, maximise their maternity leave and because of anecdotal evidence that the procedure is safer for the mother and/or the baby, which is not necessarily true. The paper points out that some doctors believe a C-section reduces the risk of being sued, even if a vaginal birth may be the optimal option. It is performed by a gynaecologist/obstetrician with an anaesthetist present throughout the procedure. The reasons for a non-elective C-section include a baby in the breech position, meaning the feet or buttocks would have entered the birth canal first instead of the head, a baby deemed too large to pass through the pelvis or if the baby or mother is in distress. Often the baby may be placed directly onto the mother’s chest after birth, allowing for skin-on-skin contact. As a C-section is serious surgery, you will be in hospital for about three days and you will have to avoid lifting, exercise and driving for six weeks while you recover.
vaginal birth after Caesarean When asked about a vaginal birth after C-section, or a VBAC, Marilyn Sher, a midwife in private practice in
Joburg, reports that these can be done successfully with an obstetrician. Ashleigh McGougan’s first child was in a breech position when she went into labour. The baby was therefore delivered via an emergency C-section, but she had her second child via a VBAC water birth, at home. This is also known as a home birth after Caesarean, or an HBAC. The VBAC is not popular as the medical profession prefers to stay away from potential risks, such as uterine rupture.
Ashleigh says her C-section was necessary only because the baby was breech and not due to any other medical condition, so she was a perfect candidate for a VBAC. It is rare to have an HBAC and finding a gynaecologist/ obstetrician who will act as a backup may be a challenge. But in Ashleigh’s case, her midwife was happy to go along with it as long as she promised to go to hospital if things got complicated.
your birth partners obstetrician/gynaecologist or midwife?
recommended by the World Health Organisation to
This can be a difficult decision. Both will offer you
have a scan at 12, 20 and 36 weeks. These, Marilyn
the same gynaecological and obstetrical services,
says, would be done by either the back-up doctor or
with full prenatal care, tests and screenings as well
a sonographer. She goes on to mention that the
as postpartum follow-up care. A midwife cannot do
South African Nursing Council’s midwife rules
surgery or Caesarean deliveries, but she/he can cut
state that the mother needs to see a doctor once
and suture episiotomies and give local anaesthetic for
in her pregnancy. “The obstetricians we work with
this. If you are having a VBAC and seeing a midwife
see the client once and thereafter only if we have
you will need a partnering obstetrician/gynaecologist
problems with the pregnancy or if the mom needs a
as a backup. If there are any complications in your
pregnancy, seeing an obstetrician/gynaecologist is the recommended route to follow.
Marilyn says her role is to give personalised
A doula is present throughout labour and is there
professional care during pregnancy, the birth and up
to offer emotional and physical support, and to
to six weeks post-delivery. “We see the moms any time
communicate with medical staff on the mother’s
between conception and birth and the checkups are
behalf. It’s not only the mothers who benefit. First-time
done on the same basis as for any doctor or clinic,”
fathers often report that a doula’s presence significantly
she says. Once labour starts, the midwife goes to the
reduced their own stress and worry. Belinda says, “The
hospital or home to support the mother and monitor
doula does not in any way take the place of a doctor or
her condition. While midwives do not do scans as
midwife, but rather assists the medical team by taking
they feel they are not essential at each visit, it is
care of the mother’s emotional needs and comfort.”
dealing with difference
geek syndrome Is Asperger’s syndrome more common in people specialising in highly-skilled fields of science and engineering? LISA LAZARUS investigates. severe autism, the content – namely, what the child talks about – and the style of their communication – for example the way a conversation is about each person taking a turn to speak – will be affected. Dr Lynda Albertyn, child psychiatrist and head of the Child, Adolescent and Family Unit at the Johannesburg Hospital, says Asperger’s syndrome as a category is likely to fall away, and that all autistic disorders will soon be analysed along a spectrum, from higher-functioning to lower-functioning.
incidence of AS According to Autism Western Cape, autism spectrum disorders affect one in 110 children globally, and are four times more common with boys than girls. In the Western Cape, approximately 10 children are diagnosed each week at three of the province’s government hospitals. It is estimated that the number of people with AS is approximately one in 500, and that the number diagnosed with autism grows by 500 percent each year. Is it a case that this diagnosis is being made more easily, or are the rates of autism just steadily rising? Certainly there do appear to be areas where the rates of autism are particularly high. Nature magazine reports on a 2010 study, which found that “clusters [of high autism rates] tended to occur in areas where parents were older and educated to
It is widely accepted that the origin of Asperger’s syndrome is multifactorial and shouldn’t be ascribed to a single cause. what is asperger’s syndrome? Jana Forrester, a Cape Town-based educational psychologist, says that AS is a form of autism characterised by normal to superior IQ, which is accompanied by social and communication difficulties. The person also exhibits restricted and repetitive patterns of behaviour, interests and activities. Supposedly, AS differs from more severe autistic disorders in that language delays and/or deviances are not as apparent. Instead, children with AS tend to show high levels of language and speech development. While it may sound as if there are significant differences between a child who is autistic and one suffering from AS, the truth is that, in the words of AS expert Dr Tony Atwood, “the difference between high-functioning autism and Asperger’s syndrome is mostly in the spelling”. For children suffering from AS and more
a higher level”. Older parents, it appears, also have a higher risk of having children with autism. Leading autism researcher Simon Baron-Cohen, also quoted in Nature magazine, is interested in the factors that promote the genetic inheritance of this disorder. He claims that the fathers of children with autism are more than twice as likely to be engineers as those of non-autistic children. Baron-Cohen hypothesises that with autism, especially higher-functioning autism, the brain has an average to heightened ability to understand a predictable system, or to “hyper-systematise”, and an inability to empathise or understand people’s feelings. This “systematising ability” can be inherited and in areas where such people are probably going to meet, get together and have children – think Silicon Valley
±1 in 110 children globally who are affected by autism spectrum disorders
– the autism rates could well be higher. In other words, scientists and engineers, those with high systematising abilities or brains, are more likely to produce autistic children, particularly when they marry each other. Baron-Cohen is not without his detractors, some of whom say that he tends to focus on very bright individuals with autism, and that his theories might give people the wrong impression; that autism is linked to being a “geek”. Dr Cobie Lombard, the principal of Unica School for Autism in Pretoria, says that it’s
“widely accepted that the origin of AS is multifactorial and shouldn’t be ascribed to a single cause”. After Helen’s son was diagnosed with AS, she began an intervention programme with him that included behaviour therapy, speech therapy (though this only worked when her son was a little older), occupational therapy and dietary intervention. “No two children suffering from AS are exactly alike,” she says. “Each child has his or her own particular issues, difficulties and obsessions.” She stresses that early intervention is critical. Noah has made remarkable improvements; this year he started at a mainstream school. “My child will always be on the autism spectrum; it is part of who he is. However, intervention has helped ensure that Noah fulfils his potential and, really, that is what all parents want for their children.”
red flags for possible autism communication: • no babbling by 11 months of age, • no simple gestures, such as waving, by 12 months, • no single words by 16 months, • no two-word phrases by 24 months, • no response when name is called, causing concern about hearing, and • loss of language or social skills at any age. behaviour: • odd or repetitive ways of moving fingers or hands, • oversensitive to certain textures, sounds or lights, • lack of interest in toys, or plays with them in an unusual and ageinappropriate way, for example, lining up, or opening and closing parts instead of playing with a toy as a whole, • compulsions or rituals – has to perform activities in a special way or
certain sequence; prone to tantrums if the ritual is interrupted, and • a preoccupation with unusual interests, such as light switches, doors and fans or unusual fears, for example, of the colour green. social: • rarely makes eye contact, • does not play peek-a-boo, • doesn’t point to show things, or follow your point, • m ore interested in looking at objects than at people’s faces, • prefers to play alone, • doesn’t make attempts to get parents’ attention, • child is in “his/her own world”, • doesn’t respond to a parent’s attempt to play, even if relaxed, and • avoids or ignores other children when they approach. Information courtesy of Autism Western Cape (autismwesterncape.org.za)
elen Hayes, the CEO of Autism Western Cape, first noticed a problem with her son, Noah, now five, when his behaviour and verbal ability changed dramatically at 22 months. “We moved to a bush camp on the border of Timbavati around this time and initially I attributed Noah’s strange behaviour to the huge change in his environment, the separation from his nanny and the lack of opportunity for socialisation in the game reserve,” she says. Helen explains that Noah stopped eating and sleeping properly. His speech started to deteriorate; whereas before he was linking two words together, he now stopped speaking altogether. He would sometimes hit himself, and began to bang his head. There were also strange obsessions, like standing with his face against the television, or running his finger over the markings in a parking lot. “I remember Googling tip-toe walking and that led me to pages about autism. With horror I realised that Noah [matched] 12 of the 15 red flags for this condition.” At just over two years old, he was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum. Noah is a somewhat atypical case, because he initially presented with a speech delay, which is uncharacteristic for this condition. The diagnosis of Asperger’s syndrome (AS) was only made later, at about five, and after three years of specialised intervention.
helping friendships grow Your child’s need for friends, and the ability to make them, changes at different ages and stages, writes GLYNIS HORNING.
the baby years: zero to one Your baby learns the basics of forming friendships when you make eye contact with them and exchange smiles. They are drawn to the human face and voice, and if you talk, sing or read to them they babble or coo in response and imitate your expressions. “A mother’s interaction and her bond with her baby from birth is vital for a secure attachment [to form] between them,” says Joburg-based clinical psychologist Clare Harvey. “This secure relationship will form the blueprint for all further relationships the child will have.” What you can do: Put your baby’s chair or pram where they can see you while you cook or do chores. Harvey says, “Constantly talk to them and give them running commentary on your actions. You are then laying the foundation for healthy, secure friendships later on in life.”
the toddler years: one to three Toddlers are notoriously selfabsorbed, seeing themselves as the centre of the universe, but they are curious about others and can show empathy. “Even one year olds have been observed trying to sooth their peers,” says Bustin. They initially play alone, but watch others at play. They then progress to “parallel play” alongside another child and, though there is little interaction, they are learning about friendship by mirroring each other’s actions or sounds. Favourite words tend to be “me” and “mine”, but they understand many more and are ripe for emotional guidance. What you can do: Coach them in feelings, consequences and self-control, all vital for friendship: “Thandi is crying because she is sad that you took her doll.” Empathise but have limits: “I know you want the spade and waiting is difficult, but Steven is using it now.” A child feels heard if you affirm their feelings or wishes, explains Bustin. They might not like a particular rule, such as waiting for their turn, but they will soon learn.
the preschool years: four to six Friendship now rests largely on the proximity of the other child and an interest in what they are playing with. But children do begin to develop deeper bonds with a few special friends, usually of the same sex. There can be trouble when one child always assumes the role of leader, or can’t get the other child’s attention. They may resort to stepping on their playmate’s sand castle or smacking to get a reaction. What you can do: Develop your child’s empathy by explaining their friend’s viewpoint: “Let Fatima play Mom for a change or she may not want to come next time.” They need to try out different roles to develop empathy or to gain perspective, says Bustin. Cape Town educational psychologist René Daniels suggests joining in your child’s imaginary play to help develop sharing and other skills. “Talking and modelling appropriate social behaviour is vital as children mirror what we do,” she says.
the primary school years: seven to 12 From the age of seven, their friendships focus on shared activities such as sports or computer games, and on talking and gossiping. “As they internalise society’s values and conventions, children’s moral reasoning increases, but they’re still at the stage of direct consequences so they want to see punishment or obedience,” says Bustin. They can be self-righteous and will likely “tell on” their friends. What you can do: Explain that this is not acceptable, unless the other child is hurting or endangering themselves or others, she says. Talk to them about physical and emotional bullying and suitable responses, and practice these (see “what to do when”). Give them opportunities to form a variety of friendships. “Invite other children home, and insist they visit others too because of the different dynamic,” says Bustin. Involve them with sporting, cultural, scouting or other interest groups.
the middle school years: from 13 With growing independence, children start opening up to friends about their intimate feelings, dreams and fears. They may also begin forming friendships with, and crushes on, the opposite sex. Loss of friendship can seem like the end of the world, and they are painfully vulnerable to exclusion from the favoured or “cool” groups that form based on looks, dress and strong personality, as well as to teasing and bullying. Today some of the most devastating bullying is done on social networking sites such as MXit and Facebook. What you can do: Understand that a degree of social pain is normal and don’t interfere unless you have to, but make sure your child knows they can turn to you for help and advice, says Harvey. Daniels adds, “Talk to them about appropriate etiquette and what to share and keep private when using social networks. Helping them deal with emotional pain will build resilience and confidence and enhance their problem-solving skills.” If your child loses a friend or is rejected by a clique, listen compassionately and ask what they are doing about it. Give encouragement and suggestions if they ask but, expressing confidence in them by letting them work through it themselves to find their own solutions is the best way to help them grow, say both psychologists.
PHOTOGRAPHS AND ILLUSTRATIONS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
atching my teenage son’s warm camaraderie with his best buddy is a delight. Yet when they first met at one of my antenatal class’s reunion teas, they ignored each other, intent only on engaging with their moms and their baby mobiles. As toddlers they played separately, exchanging words when one coveted the other’s plastic spade or scooter. It was only in preschool that they slowly began the sharing, caring and communicating they do so well today. “We are social animals, so our brains are wired for social interaction and cognition,” says Durban-based education and child psychologist Dr Caron Bustin. “Nurturing this during sensitive stages supports a child’s holistic development.” It takes patience and sensitivity, but what would any of us be without the companionship, candid advice, comfort and sheer fun of good friends?
what to do when… they fight with friends Fighting is normal, even among close friends, and as long as it’s within manageable proportions, leaving your child to sort it out teaches important life skills, says Harvey. If the fight gets heated, help them to identify their feelings and show empathy while remaining balanced. “You must have felt hurt when Vashni teased you. Do you think she may be upset because you wouldn’t let her use your crayons?” Point out consequences and encourage understanding. Say, “If you stop playing with her, could you miss having her over?” Offer support: “I know you can sort this out, but I’m here if you’d like to talk.” Above all, be a positive role model when you disagree with them, your own friends or your spouse. Calmly define the problem and your feelings and be respectful yet assertive. you don’t like their friends It’s often simpler to let an unsuitable friendship run its course than try to end it, says Harvey, “unless there could be lasting damage or danger to your child”. Calmly point out your concerns about the friend’s behaviour, and ask how it makes your child feel and
whether it fits with their values. Let them know you trust them to make the right decisions and to resist peer pressure. If a friendship is dangerous because it involves drinking or drugs, limit the opportunities for contact and encourage opportunities to meet new friends, through sport or participation in other interest groups. If the friendship continues, you may have to separate them by changing classes or schools, but this should be a last resort, says Bustin. They will often be relieved to have the matter taken from their hands. “Always consult with your child throughout this process, letting them know what your thoughts are regarding how you would like to help,” adds Harvey. they’re friends with the Queen Bee or the bully Cliques are particularly powerful in middle school, when children can have a shaky self-esteem and crave the affirmation and identity of a group. These groups often distinguish themselves by putting down outsiders or competitors, and may project negative qualities onto them, also known as “scapegoating”, to boost their own sense of superiority, says Daniels. Your child may be sucked into a clique by fear of being ridiculed and excluded, rather than because they actively support the group’s Queen Bee leader or dominant bully. “A child
who lacks confidence and has poor social skills is more likely to find themselves in such a position. Acceptance and unconditional love from you would help them take a stand and move away from such situations.” Explain the difference between popularity, which is based simply on a group’s agreement that someone is attractive and “cool”, and friendship, which is based on genuine affection, trust and support. they bully a friend A bully will often mask their actions as being “strong” or “humorous” and blame the victim. They usually manipulate others to feel powerful and in control, so make sure that there is nothing negative going on in your child’s life. “Regular quality time and checking in with one another will definitely help,” says Daniels. Never facilitate bullying. If your child wants to exclude a child from a class party, ask how they would feel. Explain that they should never tolerate bullying and disrespect from anyone, and that it will not be tolerated from them. Discuss limits and consequences, and stick to them, says Daniels. “Creating a stable home, where value and respect for one another is prized, puts your child in the best stead for building lasting relationships.”
A long school break could lead to regression in your child’s numeracy and literacy skills. SAMEERAH KAROLIA suggests ways to beat the holiday slump.
keep up the good work Dindar says parents should have some sort of plan of action for the holidays and set some ground rules, since children thrive on routine and guidelines. She suggests that you allow for leisure time and outdoor activities, as well as some prepared activities.
make the most of outings Visit museums and places of interest and then discuss with your children what they saw, felt or touched. Encourage them to draw, write and talk about their experiences. This will help develop their vocabulary and also their cognitive or thinking skills.
read, read, and read some more “Parents should encourage their children to form book clubs and introduce electronic reading devices, such as a Kindle or books on computer tablets,” says Dindar. Reward their reading by allowing them to buy a book, or to choose one online. Instead of buying books, you can also visit your local library. Ask friends and family to give you old magazines and newspapers for them to read.
make travelling fun
Van Rooyen says road trips can be a learning opportunity. “Be creative. Invent games and rules for language and maths. Play games, such as adding and subtracting the numbers on number plates, learning the colours of vehicles or playing word games.”
are also valuable as they offer opportunities to develop numeracy and language skills. Playing Monopoly will also teach your children how to manage their finances.
Children can do extra maths and English classes to combat the holiday slump. Some schools give children holiday packs, which encourage them to complete a “winter or summer challenge”. This ensures that they haven’t regressed in their maths and reading when school reopens.
have fun Nadia Tayob, a mom from Joburg who has a two-yearold daughter, Aaliya, and four-year-old son, Deen, believes that a child’s body and mind need to be stimulated every day. “Being a crafty mom myself, I love to do art and crafts with my children. Painting is always a favourite and I also encourage messy play with shaving cream or goop, made with corn starch and water. Some of our favourite outdoor activities include having water fights that involve a lot of running and giggles. We play freeze dance at home. We also do crab walk races that strengthen their arms in a fun way. To stimulate their minds, I create weekly activity trays for my children and leave them on their play shelf at home. This allows them to do the activity when their body or mind needs the stimulation, without me having to push them to do it.”
what role can teachers play?
Clarke says popular games, such as cards, Scrabble and Trivial Pursuit
Van Rooyen believes teachers can help combat this slump by supplying the
resources that parents will need for the holiday period. “Furthermore, they should follow up with parents after the holidays and also provide feedback.” “Teachers can encourage children to keep a record of all the books they read during the holidays. They could be rewarded during the term for the most books read and reviewed. At the end of the year, each grade acknowledges a reader who qualifies for a merit award,” says Dindar. Clarke suggests that schools allow pupils access to the school library during the holidays or offer a regular daily story hour. Alternatively pupils should be encouraged to borrow books from the school library that they can read over the holidays. Teachers could meet with parents before the school closes to brief them on the importance of keeping their children stimulated over the holidays. They could also provide parents with a recommended list of age-appropriate activities to do. Teachers could go the extra mile by putting together holiday packs filled with activities for the children to do over this period.
recommended resources printable worksheets • e-classroom.co.za • tlsbooks.com • abcteach.com • schoolexpress.com audiobooks • storynory.com • lightupyourbrain.com/stories children’s activity book • freestuff.co.uk/free-kidsactivity-book
eeping holiday boredom at bay is not the only thing you should be concerned about when the term ends. Shereen Dindar, an education specialist and life coach from Mpumalanga, says the holiday slump occurs when “children tend to ‘switch off’ their brains to school-related work such as reading, writing or studying”. Their minds, tuned into television and computer games, become sluggish and they experience a regression in terms of what they learnt at school during the term. Primary school teacher Marthie van Rooyen from the North West, believes that this regression is most likely to occur during the long winter and summer holidays, as children generally lose interest in school work due to a lack of stimulation during this lengthy period of downtime. A number of studies have highlighted the detrimental effects of a long-term school break. In Summer Learning Loss: The Problem and Some Solutions, published in the Education Resources Information Centre Digest, education professor Harris Cooper found that the test scores of pupils in the US were at least one month behind when they returned to school after the summer holiday. Learning loss was more pronounced for maths and spelling than for other tested skill areas, as they benefit from regular practice. Maths competency was found to be lower than reading after a long break, as parents are more likely to encourage children to read than revise their numeracy skills at home. Ensuring that your children keep active during the holidays is a sure way to avoid the “holiday slump”. Alan Clarke, a Cape Townbased education consultant, believes that, “anything that engages the child actively, whether intellectually or physically, is good for them”.
brain-boosting activities for all ages toddlers and preschoolers • Provide your children with a tactile experience by hiding small toys in a bowl of rice, beans or oats and letting them look for these objects. To strengthen fine motor skills, these small toys could also be hidden in playdough. • Print out a large alphabet to fit a sheet of paper. Put the paper inside a plastic sleeve. Give your child play dough to roll out and place onto the alphabet helping them practice writing their letters. • Get creative with finger paint, splatter paint, paint with brushes and even body paint. • Invest in educational DVDs that teach children their alphabet, numbers and colours. That way if they must watch TV, let it be something they can learn from. • If you have an iPad, download electronic books. Audio books are also great for toddlers. • There are many great YouTube animated videos on counting and learning the alphabet. Watch them with your children. • Let your children scribble with bath crayons while they bath. • Make simple picture books with your children using old photos and magazines. Write the name of the object at the top of the picture and then encourage them to read their own books. • Create themed sensory bins that contain rice and theme-orientated three-dimensional objects. You could also include cups and a magnifying glass, which enables them to use the sensory tub in many different ways. • Build puzzles and play board games.
grades 1 to 3 • Get the children to help you in the kitchen. Encouraging them to measure out the ingredients themselves, provides a learning and tactile experience. • Story time should be a part of your everyday routine. • Invest in activity books that can be purchased from book shops. • Get the children to write out your grocery lists for you as you dictate to them. • When out shopping let them pay at the till, helping them check to see if they have paid the right amount and have received the right amount of change. • Encourage them to “shop” with paper money. • If they can go to work with mom or dad, let them accompany you. Then keep them busy with activities such as filing and typing. grades 4 to 7 • Visit museums and places of historical interest. • Play sports with them and let them keep score. • Get creative with more challenging art and crafts. • Have them type out recipes or documents for you. • Encourage them to correspond with pen pals. • Get them to write out their own thank-you notes for gifts received. • Have your children keep a diary during their holidays where they write about their daily activities.
For more on the importance of reading to your child, click on childmag.co.za/content/reading-out-loud
warm the soul With JENNY MORRIS’ loving approach to everything from salads, soups and breads, to meats and veggies, Cooking with Jenny Morris will inspire the family gathering for this Father’s Day.
broad bean, new potato and bacon salad with deep-fried leeks
mussel meat and leek risotto topped with prawns
My garden is never without broad beans. I grow hundreds of the plants to keep me in a steady supply. So much of the broad bean plant is edible at different stages of its development. I often pick the beans when they are only half developed and the seeds in the pods are still small; I slice them with the pod, cook them lightly and toss them in garlic butter. I make delicious bean dips with them, and add them to stews. I pinch out about 10cm of the growing tips and cook them like spinach – yummy. My friend Enzo Cocca taught me to lightly batter them and fry them – delicious. I have the time of my life picking huge piles of beautiful fat swollen broad beans from my garden, munching as I go and thinking of all the wonderful things I can do with them. Please try this salad.
In case you have never made risotto with me before, I like to do it like this: you need time and patience for making a risotto. You spend a lot of time at the pot, keeping it moist and when all the moisture cooks away, wet it again. The end result should be creamy and tender – well worth the time spent. So get your glass of wine… and stay with the heat.
the salad • 300g new potatoes, boiled till tender, cooled and sliced • 4 baby leeks, thinly sliced and deep-fried • 250g streaky bacon, crisply fried and chopped (keep the pan) • 2 cups lightly steamed broad beans • freshly ground black pepper • salt, to taste garlic thyme dressing • ¾ cup extra virgin olive oil • 3 cloves garlic, crushed • 1 tablespoon fresh thyme leaves • ¼ cup red wine vinegar • 1 teaspoon wholegrain mustard • 2 tablespoons freshly chopped chives
1. Place the potatoes, leeks, bacon and beans in a shallow dish, and season with black pepper and a little salt. 2. When mixing the dressing, pour the olive oil in the pan in which you cooked the bacon, add the garlic, thyme and vinegar to the pan and warm gently to lift off all the lovely bacon flavour. Remove from the heat and stir in the mustard and chives. 3. Pour the warm dressing onto the potatoes and beans, and stir gently to coat.
2 teaspoons olive oil 3 tablespoons butter 1 onion, peeled and finely chopped 3 leeks, white part only, thinly sliced 2 cloves garlic, crushed 1 cup uncooked risotto rice 5 cups boiling chicken stock ½ cup dry white wine cup grated Parmesan 300g mussel meat 200g prawn meat ¾ cup cream ½ cup roughly chopped Italian parsley 3 tablespoons snipped chives salt and pepper, to taste
tip: Keep the stock hot at all times. I also love to add little cubes of roasted red pepper to this risotto as a garnish.
did you know? Once rice has been cooked, you have to take good care of it. If rice left from your dinner has stood at room temperature overnight, bacteria will have a field day; they will multiply at an alarming rate and cause food-poisoning toxins that will leave you sick, so throw out any rice that has been left out overnight. If you want to reuse any leftovers the next day to make egg-fried rice, run some cold water through the rice, bag it and put it into the fridge straightaway. Remember that bacteria can make you really ill; do not keep cooked rice for longer than two days in the fridge and never reheat it more than once.
tip: When making a salad dressing, choose good-quality vinegar; you don’t want your guests gagging and choking from the fumes of a cheap and nasty version. You can use red kidney beans or butter beans for the salad when broad beans are out of season. 22
PHOTOGRAPHS: DANIE NEL PHOTOGRAPHY
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1. Heat the olive oil and butter in a saucepan and fry the onion and leeks gently till they are soft – don’t burn them. When translucent, add the garlic and rice, and stir well to coat the rice. 2. Add a third each of the stock and the wine, stirring constantly. Simmer until almost all the liquid has been absorbed. Repeat until the stock and wine have all been used and the rice is tender. Cooking time should be 35 to 40 minutes. 3. Stir in the Parmesan cheese, and mussel and prawn meat. Add the cream, and warm the mussels and prawns through. Stir in the herbs, season with salt and pepper, and serve. I like to enrich it with a spoon of butter and then serve with a huge green salad.
figgy panettone bread and butter pudding I can’t imagine my life without a fig in it. This sexy, sweet, juicy-fleshed, biblical fruit, full of crunchy seeds, transports me to paradise. Even the thought of a wasp making her home inside the body of the fig for a short while doesn’t turn me off, unlike some people I know. When figs are really ripe, the juice oozes out of them and that is the way it should be. I am lucky to own two fig trees and I have to fight with the birds to keep the fruit on the tree for as long as possible so that they can ripen. Figs have stacks of potassium and they contain impressive amounts of fibre, so let your body make full use of them when they are in season. The wonderful thing about a fig is that it freezes so well; when my fig trees are swollen with more fresh fruit than I know what to do with, I always open-freeze a few kilos. Then I can make this delicious pudding long after the season is over. • 10 figs, sliced lengthways into quarters • 125ml honey • ¾ cup dried cranberries • 1 medium panettone, cut into 5 thick slices • 2 whole eggs • 2 extra egg yolks • grated zest of 1 orange • 30ml castor sugar • 500ml cream • ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon sugar, for sprinkling
Okay boys, this dish is simple and easy enough to prepare. This gives us girls the night off – time to take a nice deep bubble bath and, hello, no headache.
the vegetables • 6 celery stalks, roughly chopped • 4 peeled carrots, roughly chopped • 1 large head of garlic • 2 onions, peeled and thickly sliced • 4 large potatoes, washed and cut into thick rounds • 1 teaspoon dried oregano • 1 tablespoon olive oil • salt and pepper magazine durban
1. Butter a 1,5-litre ovenproof dish. Place half the sliced figs on the bottom of the dish, drizzle with honey, and scatter on the cranberries. 2. Cut each slice of panettone into 4 triangles and pack them onto the sliced figs. Mix together the eggs, extra egg yolks, orange zest, sugar, cream and cinnamon, and pour over the panettone. Leave to stand, covered, for 30 minutes.
slow, lazy man lamb the lamb • 2kg free-range lamb, (nice-sized leg or shoulder) • 1 tablespoon olive oil • salt and pepper • large stem fresh rosemary • 1 cup chicken or vegetable stock • juice of 1 lemon
3. Preheat the oven to 180°C. Arrange the remaining sliced figs over the pudding, sprinkle with a little sugar and bake for 40 to 50 minutes, until crisp and lightly browned on top. 4. Serve warm or even deliciously cold the next day.
1. Preheat the oven to 160°C. Toss all the vegetable ingredients together and place them at the bottom of a large roasting pan. 2. Oil the lamb and season with salt and pepper. Brown gently in a frying pan and remove. Place the rosemary stem onto the vegetables, top with the lamb, pour in the stock and lemon juice, and seal with foil. Just forget about it for 2½ hours. 3. Check for tenderness. You will know that the meat is ready when it falls away from the bone. 4. Serve with a mound of buttery, garlicky polenta.
If you don’t have panettone, you can use five thick slices of raisin bread instead.
about the book Cooking with Jenny Morris (Sunbird Publishers) opens the door to the Giggling Gourmet’s kitchen and is a definitive collection of culinary ideas, with its A–Z index of ingredients and corresponding recipes. For instance, you’ll learn 10 different ways to work with goat’s cheese and 26 unique seafood and fish recipes. Jenny’s tips and tales, such as how she used to pick mussels off the rocks with her dad, will help you set the scene as much as they’ll show you how to prepare the dish. Cooking with Jenny Morris is available from all good book stores.
romance me Here are some charming ways to spend much-needed quality time with your partner. By TAMLYN VINCENT
Horseback Beach Adventures has idyllic and romantic beach rides for two. The romantic day trip takes you on a threehour ride along the beach, and incorporates a picnic for two. The price includes a bouquet of flowers and a CD of photos from your ride. You could opt for an adventurous 12km sunset ride, which leaves late in the afternoon, travels along the beach trail and heads through the bush by the light of the moon. Contact Amelia or Terence: 084 467 0752 or firstname.lastname@example.org
Drive out to the country, enjoy the fresh air and indulge in a little old-world romance when you transport yourself back in time and dine in a train diner built in the 1930s. Umgeni Steam Railway, situated at Inchanga Station, has transformed one of their carriages into a restaurant. The dining car is open on Sunday for breakfast, morning tea and lunch. Visitors can also tour the Railway museum and station. Contact Bev: 083 226 1024 or visit bevelart.net
on horseback at sunset
dinner in the diner
Situated in the picturesque Valley of 1000 Hills, Phezulu Safari Park offers an allround African experience including scenic game drives for spotting zebra, giraffe, impala and wildebeest, a lesson on the medicinal plants in the area and a restaurant specialising in traditional Zulu dishes. Visit the Gasa clan and see traditional beehive huts, watch a Zulu dancing show and round off your visit with a walk through the snake and crocodile park. Contact: 031 777 1000, info@phezulusafaripark. co.za or visit phezulusafaripark.co.za
Find the romantic side of uShaka Marine World when you enjoy the culinary delights of The Cargo Hold, which is submerged in the stern of The Phantom Ship and boasts views into the ocean and shark tank. The Upper Deck restaurant is slightly more casual with an open-plan design that allows diners to watch the chefs in action. Why not arrange an After Dark stroll through the Aquarium or meander along the Village Walk and browse the shops. Animal Encounters offers Shark Dives, the Ocean Walker, a Ray Feed and Meet a Dolphin. Contact: 031 328 8000 or visit ushakamarineworld.co.za
the air up there See the world pass slowly beneath you with Sky Adventures as you take off in a hot-air balloon from the Kamberg Valley, just below Giantâ€™s Castle in the Drakensberg, or from Tala Game Reserve. For that special occasion, try the River Run Picnic Flight, which gives you a scenic tour of Durban in a helicopter before stopping over on a hill to enjoy a picnic. For the more adventurous, microlight flights, sky diving and tandem skydive jumps are available. Contact Robyn: 073 334 7911, email@example.com or visit skyadventures.co.za
treetop tour Enjoy the beauty of the second largest indigenous forest in Southern Africa as you slide between treetop platforms with Karkloof Canopy Tour. Stop at a 15-metre waterfall to marvel at the panoramic views across the Karkloof Valley. The adrenaline pumping tour takes you whizzing through the air while suspended high above the ground by steel cables. The tour itself takes you to nine platforms via eight slides, with the longest slide being over 180 metres. Contact: 033 330 3415 or visit facebook.com/karkloofcanopy or karkloofcanopytour.co.za
harbour hot spot
Couples can enjoy a variety of activities in the vibrant setting of Wilson’s Wharf, situated on Durban’s Victoria embankment. There is an indoor art and craft market, harbour cruises and romantic tours out to sea. Wander the waterfront while enjoying an ice cream or relax at the Oyster Bar and Zenbi Sushi while watching the ships entering and leaving the harbour. The Catalina Theatre hosts a variety of theatrical productions by local artists. Contact Catalina Theatre: 031 305 6889, firstname.lastname@example.org or visit catalinatheatre.co.za or contact Oyster Bar and Zenbi Sushi: 031 307 7883 or visit wilsonswharf.co.za
Go for a quiet walk along the water’s edge, roller skate along a promenade or windsurf in the waves at one of Durban’s many beaches. In Durban central, the Golden Mile stretches from uShaka Marine World to Suncoast Casino where vendors sell crafts and ice cream along the beachfront and rickshaw rides are available. South of Durban you will find Amanzimtoti Beach and Bazley Beach and, to the north, Umhlanga Beach offers a promenade, restaurants and shops. The further south or north of the coast you go, the less populated the beaches. For more info: visit durban-tourism.com
the art of romance
new heights The Moses Mabhida Stadium Sky Car travels up to the top of the arch, where couples are treated to panoramic views of Durban and the ocean. If exercise is your thing try the Adventure Walk, which safely covers 500 steps and takes you up one of the legs of the arch. For the thrill seekers, the Big Rush Big Swing has you jumping out at 80 metres above the pitch and swinging in a 220m arc. Once your adventures are over, indulge in the Latin flavours of Cuba Lounge, or try something Italian from Nino’s. Contact: 031 582 8242 or visit mmstadium.com
Leafy trees and parks give Glenwood a relaxed and romantic air with old colonial houses, that have been renovated into cafés, boutiques and antique shops. Take a stroll down Bulwer Road and Helen Joseph Road to browse shops, sip coffee and enjoy the sights. Restaurants spill out onto the pavements, and offer cuisine to suit most tastes – a favourite for Mediterranean cuisine is Olive and Oil. Take in the art and local crafts of the KwaZulu-Natal Society of Arts Gallery. Contact KZNSA Gallery: 031 202 3686, KZNSA Restaurant: 031 201 9969, KZNSA Shop: 031 277 1700 or visit kznsagallery.co.za or contact Olive and Oil: 031 201 6146 or visit oliveandoil.co.za
dangerous liaisons Shark Cage Diving KZN takes you under the water and close to between five and 20 sharks. Based in Park Rynie on the South Coast, this open-sea adventure is just a short drive away. No diving experience is required and you may get the chance to see different shark species; from dusky sharks to blacktip sharks. There is also a talk on sharks and marine life, plus they show you the shark nets and demonstrate how they work. Run by a practised scuba diver, who has experience in diving with sharks, this is a safe and thrilling way to see the ocean’s predators. Contact John: 082 373 5950, johnmiller@sharkcagedivingkzn. com or visit sharkcagedivingkzn.com
country caper Meander the midlands and enjoy the art galleries, craft shops and quaint restaurants that dot the roads. Stop to taste goat’s milk cheese at Swissland Cheese, see how beer is brewed at Nottingham Road Brewing Company or enjoy lunch at La Lampara Italian Restaurant. Take a look at wood turning, leather crafts, pottery, glass blowing and wrought iron crafts or simply enjoy the beautiful scenery, with rolling hills, an abundance of trees and sparkling rivers and dams. Contact: marketing@ midlandsmeander.co.za or visit midlandsmeander.co.za
run away together Fordoun is situated in the rolling hills of Nottingham Road in the Midlands. This spa and boutique hotel was converted from an old farmyard and dairy, and now offers guests a spa, a heated swimming pool and a highdining restaurant for exceptional cuisine. Activities such as canopy tours, horse riding and hot-air ballooning are all nearby. Whether you spend your time relaxing or take part in an adventure, Fordoun is the ideal romantic getaway. Contact: 033 266 6217, email@example.com or visit fordoun.com
a good read for toddlers Dinosaur Dig! By Penny Dale
for th e boys
(Published by Nosy Crow, R66) This beautifully illustrated book by Ten in the Bed author Penny Dale combines young boys’ favourite subjects – digging, dirt, driving fast – and most important of all, dinosaurs. With a great story line, lots of absorbing detail and even some counting, the books are full of energy. Dinosaur Zoom!, the second book in the series for children from age two, will be released later this year. In this book the dinosaurs are back and this time they’ll be revving, roaring and racing at a dinosaur birthday party. The sturdy board book is easy to clean and is sure to become a favourite with your little boy.
for early graders
for preteens and teens
a little bi of ma t gic
Sophie and the Shadow Woods – The Goblin King By Linda Chapman and Lee Weatherly (Published by HarperCollins Children’s Books, R55) Six gems, one key and one guardian to save the world – Sophie. On her 10th birthday, Sophie’s life changes forever. As the new guardian of a magic gateway in the mysterious Shadow Woods, her mission is to stop the mischievous creatures that live there from entering our world. But disaster strikes when the Goblin King steals the key to the gateway. Girls from the age of seven will love this series. Also look out for The Swamp Boggles, The Spider Gnomes, The Fog Boggarts, The Icicle Imps and The Bat Sprites. You can also visit the website, sophieandtheshadowwoods.com for activity sheets and other fun games.
The Peppers and the International Magic Guys By Siân Pattenden (Published by HarperCollins Children’s Books, R82) This is the wonderful world of the Peppers, a show-stopping adventure starring an unbeatable double act – the Pepper twins: Monty and Esmé. They are spending the summer holidays with their Uncle Potty, a member of the International Magic Guys organisation. So when it is threatened with closure, the twins must use every trick in the book to save it. But the escapologist is all tied up and the human cannonball has put Potty’s assistant out of action. Can the twins still pull off the performance of a lifetime?
parenting book Parenting Apart By Christina McGhee (Published by Random House Struik, R215) This is a comprehensive resource for separated and divorced parents wanting to raise happy and secure children. When a marriage ends, the most important thing parents can do is help their children through the difficult transition and remain united as parents even if they are no longer a couple. Divorce coach Christina McGhee offers practical advice on how to help children adjust and thrive during and after separation and divorce.
Finding Aunt Joan and Swimming in the Sun By Jenny Hatton; illustrated by Joan Rankin (Published by Jacana Media, R40) While you can read these books to your pre-schooler, this delightful new series also helps beginner readers build their reading confidence. The exquisite illustrations bring the series to life and children will easily relate to the stories as they reflect true-to-life events such as going on a journey, moving house and visiting the beach. The rhythmic text of the Lucy books will help build children’s reading skills and confidence while they are absorbed in the humorous illustrations and the lives of Lucy’s family.
for us In the Orchard, the Swallows By Peter Hobbs (Published by Faber and Faber, R150) In the foothills of a mountain range in Northern Pakistan is a beautiful orchard – swallows dive silently over the branches, and the scent of jasmine threads through the air. Pomegranates hang heavy, their skins darkening to a deep crimson. Neglected now, the trees are beginning to grow wild, their fruit left to spoil. Many miles away, a frail young man is flung out of prison gates. Looking up, scanning the horizon for swallows in flight, he stumbles and collapses in the roadside dust. His ravaged body tells the story of 15 years of brutality. Just one image has held and sustained him – the thought of the young girl who left him dumbstruck with wonder all those years ago. But they were children then, and knew nothing of love, or cruelty. This is a tale of tenderness in the face of great and corrupt power.
Shaka the Great By Walton Golightly (Published by Quercus Publishing, R225) It is 1826 and Shaka, king of the Zulus, has brutally consolidated his power and is ready to move against those who continue to resist his authority. But now a new tribe has emerged: white men from across the Great Water, claiming that they wish to trade with Shaka. As the king grows increasingly obsessed with these outsiders, he becomes oblivious to the threat growing from within his own court. Only Shaka’s loyal captain and his young sidekick have the power to thwart this conspiracy but to succeed, their wits need to be as sharp as their enemies’ knives. Seething with sorcery and betrayal, battles and intrigue, triumph and tragedy, Shaka the Great takes us to an empire at its zenith; to a time when the name Zulu began to echo around the world as a byword for courage and nobility.
Classic tales from Penguin Books can be yours
The Beatrix Potter books are loved by children everywhere for their humorous, lively tales and beautiful illustrations. The Tale of Peter Rabbit turns 110 this year and to celebrate, Penguin Books has released a special collection of all the Beatrix Potter books. There are 23 titles in the collection and each book contains a publisher’s note explaining how that tale came to be. For more info: visit penguinbooks.co.za One reader stands a chance to win a Beatrix Potter hamper containing the first 10 books in the collection, valued at R850. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-dbn and use the code “Peter Rabbit DBN”.
what’s on in june
You can also access the calendar online at
Here’s your guide for what to do, where to go and who to see. Compiled by TAMLYN VINCENT.
FUN for children
only for parents
bump, baby & tot in tow
how to help
SPECIAL EVENTS Curro Hillcrest Christian Academy Winter Fair Fun rides, fleamarket stalls and entertainment for the whole family.
FUN FOR CHILDREN
ONLY FOR PARENTS
bump, baby & tot in tow
how to help
Professor Twiddle’s Terrific Time Machine Children go on a theatrical interactive journey.
Abbamaniacs An uproarious musical comedy featuring the hits of the legendary Swedish supergroup.
Babygym Teaches mom about waking baby’s senses, relaxing baby and developing strong muscles.
Put Foot rally Team Pink Panther treks through Southern Africa to deliver shoes to a school in Zambia.
DSD Bierfest A fundraiser for the German School. The ticket includes your meal and first drink. Time: 7:30pm–12:30am. Venue: Mr Price Kings Park Stadium, Stamford Hill. Cost: R250. Contact Liska: 031 267 1307 or firstname.lastname@example.org Family market Browse over 50 stalls and enjoy entertainment in a safe venue. Time: 5pm. Venue: Durban North College, Prospect Hall Rd, Durban North. Cost: free entry, parking R10. Contact Liezel: 082 824 2570 Primary school drama evening Book for an evening of drama, choral verses and entertainment. Time: 6pm. Venue: Holy Family College school hall, 1 Convent Close, Glenmore. Cost: R20. Contact Shelley: email@example.com
Moyeni Pre-primary annual family fun day This family day offers food, refreshments, games, prizes and stalls. Time: 8:30am–1pm. Venue: 31 Bailey Rd, Athlone Park, Amanzimtoti. Cost: free entry. Contact: 082 320 2920 or firstname.lastname@example.org Wildsfees There is potjiekos, music, exhibitors and more. Cash bar available. Take your own chairs, cutlery and drinks. No children allowed. Time: 6pm. Venue: Durban North College, Prospect Hall Rd. Cost: R130, includes threecourse meal. Contact Elmien or Tinkie: 083 487 5697 or 082 772 2923 Yellow Brick Road Pre-primary family fun day Participate in the big walk and support the food and market stalls. Time: 8:30am–1pm. Venue: Warner Beach Preparatory, senior campus fields, Bailey Lane. Cost: free entry. Contact Kerry: 083 540 3239 or email@example.com
Centenary fun day Gordon Road Girls’ School celebrates the centenary. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: 69 Gordon Rd, Morningside. Cost: tbc. Contact: 031 303 2628 or visit grgs.co.za Curro Hillcrest Christian Academy winter fair Fleamarket stalls, pony rides, jumping castles and more. Time: 9am–4pm. Venue: HCA campus, Inanda Rd, Hillcrest. Cost: free entry. Contact Karen: 031 765 2752 or visit curro.co.za Fun day Fun stalls and activities are organised by each of the 16 classes at Morningside Primary School. Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: 200 North Ridge Rd, Morningside. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 303 2413 or firstname.lastname@example.org
Comrades Marathon Support the runners as they run from Pietermaritzburg to Durban. Time: start 5:30am, finish 5:30pm. For more info: visit comrades.com N3TC Royal Drakensberg Mountain Bike Challenge Test your skill in a day of mountain biking and trail running. There are various rides and runs available, as well as a Kids Zone and All Out Adventures with activities. Time: 7am. Venue: Royal Drakensberg Primary School. Cost: Kids Zone R50, rides and trail run cost varies. For more info: visit royal-drakensberg.org.za
SPECIAL EVENTS 1 friday
5 tuesday Roxette Relive your favourite hits with the Swedish pop duo. Time: 8pm. Venue: ICC, Durban CBD. Cost: R320–R480. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
7 thursday Jeff Dunham The world-famous ventriloquist entertains with his entourage of new characters. Time: 8pm. Venue: ICC, Durban CBD. Cost: R250–R500. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
9 saturday 2 June – Curro Hillcrest Christian Academy winter fair
Livingstone Primary walkathon and fun day There are plenty of fun activities,
R120, on the day R130, children R50. Contact: 031 322 4021, dbginfo@durban. gov.za or visit webtickets.co.za
12 tuesday Roseway Waldorf open morning A short talk on Waldorf education is followed by a tour of the school, tea and questions. Time: 9am. Venue: Roseway Waldorf, 435 District Rd, Alverstone. Cost: free. Contact Billie: 031 768 1309 or visit rosewaywaldorf.co.za 10 June – Durban Duck Day
including a foefie slide, tombola, jumping castles and pony rides. Time: 8:30am. Venue: Livingstone Primary School, 74 Livingstone Rd, Morningside. Cost: free entry. Contact Lisa: 031 312 2026 or visit email@example.com
Durban Surf Carnival This multidisciplinary surf event features longboarding, stand-up paddlesurfing, a free surfing clinic and a free photography competition. Ends 17 June. Time: 7am–5pm. Venue: New Pier, Durban. Cost: spectators free; competitors R200. Contact Paul: 083 560 1185
Durban Duck Day Ten thousand rubber bath ducks are released to float towards a finish line, where the winning duck can win big. There are family activities such as duck dancing and duck dress-up competitions. Time: tbc. Venue: Yacht Mole, Durban Harbour. Cost: R10 per duck. Contact: 031 266 9828 or visit durbanduckday.co.za Joyce Broadhead Pre-primary fun day A day with games, pony rides, food stalls and more. Time: 10am–2pm. Venue: DPHS, Gordon Rd, Morningside. Cost: free entry. Contact Avril or Sonja: 031 202 3427 Mango Groove and The Meditators The Old Mutual Music at the Lake brings audiences another popular act. Time: 2:30pm. Venue: Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: adults
Father’s Day spit braai A no frills lunch with plenty of meat. Time: 11:30am. Venue: Akimbo Kids, Drummond. Cost: tbc. Contact: 083 261 2742
Top Gear Festival Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May and The Stig bring audiences an adrenaline-charged live show, with flaming rally cars, FMX bikes, hair-raising stunt manoeuvres and more. Other outdoor features include a street circuit, supercars and motoring memorabilia. Also 17 June. Time: 10am–8pm. Venue: Moses Mabhida Stadium, Stamford Hill. Cost: R250–R995. For more info: visit topgearfestival.co.za
22 friday Durban International Boat and Lifestyle Show There are outdoor boating displays, coffee, light meals and other attractions. Ends 24 June. Time: 9am–5pm. Venue: Durban Marina. Cost: varies. Contact: 031 266 9828 or visit durbanboatshow.co.za
23 saturday Professor Twiddle’s Terrific Time Machine The eccentric Professor Twiddle and the Jones Quad Squad go on amazing travels
calendar R100. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.co.za
The School of Garden Design ladies’ breakfast Join other ladies and guest speaker Tanya Visser in aid of The Sunflower Fund. A prize is awarded to the lady with the most creative brooch. Time: 7:45am–11am. Venue: Heritage Theatre, Heritage Market, 9 Old Main Rd, Hillcrest. Cost: R150. Contact Lindsay: 082 449 9237 or firstname.lastname@example.org
30 saturday Dostana A Bollywood spectacular. Ends 1 July. Time: 8pm, Saturday; 3pm, Sunday. Venue: The iZulu Theatre, Sibaya, Umdloti. Cost: R100–R120. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Phezulu Village Experience Zulu culture. Time: 8am–4:30pm, daily; dancing 10am, 11:30am, 2pm and 3:30pm. Venue: Old Main Rd, Botha’s Hill. Cost: varies. Contact: 031 777 1000 or visit phezulusafaripark.co.za Rhino Meets Reality Artwork from local schools is on display, where there is also a competition and a collection of five-cent coins, all in aid of Project Rhino KZN. Time: varies. Venue: Crescent Shopping Centre, Umhlanga Ridge. Cost: free entry. For more info: visit thecrescent.co.za through time. This interactive theatrical journey is for children, by children. Also 24 June. Time: 10am. Venue: Under the Fig Tree Amphitheatre, Durban Botanic Gardens. Cost: R30. Contact Jean: 082 560 7185 The Sugarbabe Foundation AGM Parents of children with diabetes and other interested members of the public are invited. Time: 1pm–3pm. Venue: Westville Hospital lecture theatre. Cost: tbc. Contact Eldice: 072 695 3416, 084 888 5666 or email@example.com
Shongweni. Cost: R5. Contact Shelley: 071 361 2838, firstname.lastname@example.org or visit zigzagfarm.com
25 monday Singa-little-longa A morning of fun, with storytelling, puppetry, dress-up, singing and drumming. For children 1–10 years old. Ends 13 July. Time: 10am. Venue: Under the Fig Tree Amphitheatre, Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: R50. Contact Sandy: 082 865 0226 or email@example.com
Kidz and Teenz fun day Activities include crafts, mehndi, face painting and more. There are also educational talks on parenting and health. Time: 9:30am–5pm. Venue: Balmoral Hotel, Marine Parade, North Beach. Cost: R10. Contact Rookaya: 083 623 1154 or firstname.lastname@example.org Mind, Body, Soul Fair A wellness fair to shop for a range of products and services including aromatherapy, reflexology, crystals and oils. Time: 10am–4pm. Venue: Westville Civic Centre, Buckingham Terrace, Westville. Cost: free entry. Contact Shalini: 074 428 3431 Zig Zag Farm family country fair There is a range of art and crafts, food stalls as well as live music and entertainment for the children. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: Zig Zag Farm, B14, ext. of Kassier Rd,
Icons of the 80s Relive the 80s with stars like Michael Jackson and Bryan Adams. Ends 12 August. Time: varies. Venue: The Barnyard Theatre, Gateway. Cost: R100– R135. Contact: 031 566 3045 or visit barnyardtheatres.co.za Imperial Russian Ballet This renowned ballet company returns with Carmina Burana. Ends 27 June. Time: 7:30pm. Venue: Playhouse Opera Theatre, Durban CBD. Cost: R130–R250. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
24 June – Zig Zag Farm family country fair
classes, talks and workshops Art lessons Learn to paint and draw using various techniques. For children of any age. Time: 3:30pm–4:30pm, every Thursday. Venue: 128 Manfred Dr, Rosehill. Cost: R380. Contact Suzette: 074 178 9388 or email@example.com Core 4 Kids Action-filled classes to build upper body and core muscle strength. The fun activities challenge different body parts. For children 6–9 years. Time: 2pm–3pm or 3pm–4pm, Monday and Tuesday. Venue: Danville Ave, Glenashley. Cost: R70. Contact Michaela: 074 101 2616 Drumkidz lessons Djembe drum sessions get children drumming to stories, songs and games. Eight lessons offered per term. Time: 3pm–3:30pm, every Tuesday. Venue: Twinfalls Spur, Field’s Shopping Centre, Kloof. Cost: R310 per term, registration R95. Contact Robynne: 083 631 6064, robynne@ drumkidz.co.za or visit drumkidz.co.za
29 friday ECR House and Garden Show Décor and garden inspiration with over 300 exhibitors. The theme is “Inspired Living” with a Celebrity Kitchen, Garden Pavilion, Homegrown Fair and The Food Market. Ends 8 July. Time: 10am. Venue: Durban Exhibition Centre, Durban CBD. Cost: adults R60, children under 16 free. Contact: 031 303 5941 or visit housegardenshow.co.za World of Wonders A musical variety show, with magicians, clowns, jugglers and more. Ends 1 July. Time: varies. Venue: Rhumbelow Theatre, Umbilo. Cost:
‘Lil Doodlers Children make quality, practical crafts and have fun. Time: varies. Venue: Glenashley, Durban North. Cost: R320 per month. Contact Gwyn: 082 338 5721 or firstname.lastname@example.org Meditation classes for children 5–12 years old. 10 June. Time: 10am–11:15am. Venue: Mahasiddha Kadampa Buddhist Centre, 2 Hollings Rd, Malvern. Cost: R10. Contact: 031 464 0984, email@example.com or visit meditateindurban.org Yoga for children Develop strength and flexibility while improving concentration and coordination. Time: 3pm, every Friday. Venue: Centre of Wellbeing, 16 Canberra Ave, Durban North. Cost: R40. Contact Angela: 076 410 1410 or firstname.lastname@example.org
family outings Books2You winter warehouse sale 25–29 June. Time: 8:30am–4pm. Venue: Unit 6, Afriscan Park, 22 Shepstone Rd, New Germany. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 705 7744, email@example.com or visit books2you.co.za Duck ’n Deck animal farmyard Children can interact with farm animals or take a pony ride. Time: 9am–4:30pm, every Tuesday–Sunday. Venue: 3 Willow Way, Assagay. Cost: R15. Contact: 031 768 1029 or visit duckanddeck.co.za Music Under the Marula A funfilled festival with live music, children’s entertainment, stalls and more. 3 June. Time: 11am–5pm. Venue: Under the Marula, Shongweni. Cost: R5 entrance. Contact: 082 312 6114, musicunderthemarula@ gmail.com or visit underthemarula.com
finding nature and outdoor play Akimbo Kids This play venue has a large, open playground and separate toddler play area. Ideal for children aged 1–7 years. Time: 9am–4pm, Tuesday–Thursday; 9am–5pm, Saturday–Sunday. Venue: Drummond. Cost: R20 entry for children. For more info: visit akimbo.co.za Crow Tours Take a tour of the rehabilitation centre for wildlife. 24 June. Time: 10:30am–12:30pm. Venue: 2 Coedmore Ave, Yellowwood Park. Cost: R20. Contact: 031 462 1127 or visit crowkzn.co.za The Animal Farmyard See daily milking demonstrations and go on pony, tractor and foefie slide rides. Time: 9am–4:30pm, daily; milking 10:30am and 3:30pm. Venue: 3 Lello Rd, Botha’s Hill. Cost: varies. Contact: 031 765 2240 or visit animalfarmyard.co.za
29 June – ECR House and Garden Show
Busyballers Holiday Clinic There are obstacle courses, races and other ageappropriate games for children 3–10 years old. 25, 27 and 29 June and 2, 4 and 6 July. Time: 8am–12pm, drop off earlier by arrangement. Venue: Morningside Sports Club, 132 Hollander Crescent. Cost: R80. Contact Lisa: 083 236 0059, lisa@ busyballers.co.za or visit busyballers.co.za Imagine That holiday club Children learn how to scrapbook, decoupage and more. Time: 1pm–4pm. Venue: 25, 27, 29 June, 2, 6, 9 and 12 July, Imagine That, The Crescent Shopping Centre; 26, 28 June, magazine durban
Rhino Meets Reality at the Crescent Shopping Centre
3 and 10 July, Imagine That, Windermere Shopping Centre. Cost: R120–R170. Contact: 031 566 3354 (The Crescent) or 031 312 7855 (Windermere) Reduce. Reuse. Recycle holiday programme There are workshops on recycling processes and experiments showing how renewable energy sources are good for us. 23 June–15 July. Time: varies. Venue: KZN Sciencentre, Gateway. Cost: adults R25, children R30. Contact: info@ sciencentre.co.za Sugar Bay Choose from three holiday camps, with a “Nickelodeon”, “Bali” or “Music, art and drama” theme. 24 June–15 July. Time: varies. Venue: Zinkwazi Beach. Cost: varies. Contact: 032 485 3778, holidays@sugarbay. co.za or visit sugarbay.co.za
markets Essenwood Market Fresh food, children’s activities and a range of stalls. Time: 9am–2pm, every Saturday. Venue: Essenwood Rd. Contact: 031 208 1264 or visit essenwoodmarket.com Florida Road Lifestyle Market For locally made products. 24 June. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: cnr Florida Rd and Gordon Rd, Morningside. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 311 4500 or firstname.lastname@example.org Golden Hours Family Market Fundraising initiative of Golden Hours Special School. Time: 10am–3:30pm, every Sunday. Venue: Uitsig Rd, Durban North. Cost: free entry. Contact Lyn: 083 262 3693 Heidi’s Farm Stall Market Choose from cakes, coffee, food and crafts. Time: 9am–3pm, every Saturday and Sunday. Venue: 1 Clement Stott Rd. Contact: 072 927 8242 or email@example.com I Heart Market Hand- and homemade crafts. 2 June. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Moses Mabhida Stadium, Stamford Hill. Contact: firstname.lastname@example.org Kloof Country Market Find quality products and homemade goods. 2 and 16 June. Time: 9am–12:30pm. Venue: Robyndale Centre, 10 Msenga Rd, Kloof. Contact Linda: 082 454 3181 or linda@ healinghandskzn.co.za Shongweni Farmer’s and Craft Market Organic and local produce and crafts. Time: 6:30am–10:30am, every Saturday. Venue: cnr Kassier Rd and Alverstone Rd, Assagay. Contact Christine: 083 777 1674, email@example.com or visit shongwenimarket.co.za magazine durban
The Food Market For locally produced foods. 30 June. Time: 8am–1pm. Venue: The Hellenic Community Centre, Durban North. Contact: 084 505 0113 or visit thefoodmarket.co.za Umhlanga Antiques Fair 17 June. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Umhlanga Centre, 189 Ridge Rd, Umhlanga Rocks. Contact James: 082 821 9031 Village Green open days The charity shops, tea garden and nursery are open. Time: 8am–12pm, every Monday and Saturday. Venue: 29 Village Rd, Village Green, Kloof. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 764 1212/3 or visit kloofspca.co.za Wonder Market There’s something for everyone. 3 June. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Chris Saunders Park, Gateway. Contact Tarryn: 079 747 7661, wonder@wondermarket. co.za or visit wondermarket.co.za
on stage and screen Drakensberg Boys Choir Wednesday concert Time: 3:30pm–5:30pm, every Wednesday. Venue: Ken MacKenzie Auditorium, Drakensberg Boys Choir School. Cost: adults R100, children R50. Contact Lauren: 036 468 1012, bookings@ dbchoir.co.za or visit dbchoir.co.za Mango Groove and The Meditators See them perform at the Old Mutual Music at the Lake. 10 June. Time: 2:30pm. Venue: Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: adults R120, on the day R130, children R50. Contact: 031 322 4021, dbginfo@ durban.gov.za or visit webtickets.co.za Professor Twiddle’s Terrific Time Machine Meet the Ug-g clan, Cleopatra and inventors through history. 23–24 June. Time: 10am. Venue: Under the Fig Tree Amphitheatre, Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: R30. Contact Jean: 082 560 7185 Singa-little-longa A morning of fun, with storytelling, puppetry, dress-up, singing and drumming. For children 1–10 years old. 25 June–13 July. Time: 10am. Venue: Under the Fig Tree Amphitheatre, Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: R50. Contact: 082 865 0226 or admin. firstname.lastname@example.org World of Wonders A musical variety show, with magicians, clowns, jugglers and more. 29 June–1 July. Time: varies. Venue: Rhumbelow Theatre, Umbilo. Cost: R100. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.co.za
Heidi’s Farm Stall Market
sport and physical activities Westwood Paintball Time: varies. Venue: Westwood Shopping Mall, Lincoln Terrace. Cost: R100 for one hour and 100 paintballs. Contact: 082 556 5540 or email@example.com
only for parents classes, talks and workshops Bikram yoga Yoga classes in a heated studio. Time: 5:15pm–6:45pm, every Tuesday and Thursday. Venue: Body Guru Gym, Umhlanga. Cost: varies. Contact Heather: 083 764 0752, firstname.lastname@example.org or visit bikramyogadurban.co.za North Coast Art Group meeting Local artist Carol Hayward Fell gives an illustrated talk on different artistic disciplines. Take along a sketchbook and a drawing pencil. 9 June. Time: 9:15am–12pm. Venue: Catholic Church, 2 Newport Ave, Virginia. Cost: members R20, visitors R30. Contact Jeannette: 082 963 5352 Permaculture food garden workshop An interactive experience teaches you how to harvest vegetables from your own garden. 2 and 23 June. Time: 8:30am–3pm. Venue: Permaculture Garden, Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: R150. Contact: 031 322 4021 or email@example.com
Pilates classes Beginner classes develop and improve posture, core strength and tone. Time: 4:15pm, every Tuesday and Thursday. Venue: Pilates in Motion, Musgrave. Cost: R250 or R450. Contact Laura-May: 082 443 4533, firstname.lastname@example.org or visit pilatesinmotion.co.za Pilates precision Master the art of Pilates to lose weight and tone. Time: 5:30pm–6:30pm, every Tuesday or Thursday. Venue: Kloof Civic Hall or School of Modern Montessori, Gillitts. Cost: R280. Contact Sarah: 071 1834161 or email@example.com Weight-loss challenge This 12-week course teaches you about healthy nutrition and losing weight while having fun. Starts 6 or 8 June. Time: varies. Venue: Umhlanga Rocks. Cost: R350. Contact Tracy: 082 852 4890 or firstname.lastname@example.org
on stage and screen Abbamaniacs 30 May–24 June. Time: 7:30pm, Tuesday–Saturday; 3pm, Sunday. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, UKZN, Glenwood. Cost: R129. Book through Computicket: visit computicket.com Icons of the 80s 26 June–12 August. Time: varies. Venue: The Barnyard Theatre, Gateway. Cost: R135, Wednesday–Saturday; R100, Tuesday and Sunday. Contact: 031 566 3045, gateway@barnyardtheatres. co.za or visit barnyardtheatres.co.za
playtime and story time Book Club Children discuss books they have read. Time: 3pm, every Friday. Venue: La Lucia Library, 1 Library Lane. Cost: free. Contact: 031 572 2986 Books and Books story time Time: 10am– 11am, every Saturday. Venue: Kensington Square, Durban North. Cost: free. Contact: 031 563 6288 or visit booksandbooks.co.za Children’s story time Followed by a craft or activity. For ages 3–8 years. Time: 10am, every Saturday. Venue: 26 Rockview Rd, Amanzimtoti. Cost: free. Contact: 031 903 6692 or email@example.com Steam train rides Ride a miniature steam engine. 10 and 24 June. Time: 11am–4pm. Venue: 4 Hinton Grove, Virginia. Cost: R5 per ride. Contact Gerald: 031 205 1089 or 082 569 1383
Mr Bloom’s Nursery This television series uses live action and puppetry to teach children about vegetables and caring for their environment. Children discover that the garden shed is a lively place, full of young vegetable characters. Premieres 18 June on CBeebies, DStv channel 306. Time: 8:55am or 4:55pm. For more info: visit bbc. co.uk/cbeebies/
26 June –12 August – Icons of the 80s
Imperial Russian Ballet 26–27 June. Time: 7:30pm. Venue: Playhouse Opera Theatre, Durban CBD. Cost: R130–R250. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com Roxette 5 June. Time: 8pm. Venue: ICC, Durban CBD. Cost: R320–R480. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
support groups Adhasa Support Groups For details on meeting times and support, contact Stuart: 031 298 8896 or Robin: 082 499 1344 Born Sleeping Parents bereaved by stillbirths and miscarriages share their experiences. Contact: 084 524 1541/2 or visit bornsleeping.wordpress.com or visit their Facebook page: Born Sleeping Cansa Support Durban North Second Tuesday of every month. Venue: Durban North Methodist Church hall. Contact: 031 564 2510 Childhood cancer parent support group Choc schedules regular support meetings. Contact Gill: 084 831 3683 or visit choc.org.za Durban Autism Support Group Coffee mornings are held four times a year. Contact: 083 443 8385 or firstname.lastname@example.org Famsa Offers family and relationship counselling. Contact: 031 202 8987 or visit 30 Bulwer Rd, Glenwood, Durban Hi Hopes Home intervention programme for children who are deaf or hard of hearing. Contact: 082 897 1632, dianne.goring@ hihopes.co.za or visit hihopes.co.za Reach for Recovery breast cancer support group Meets for bring-and-share
Jeff Dunham ventriloquist 7 June. Time: 8pm. Venue: ICC, 45 Bram Fischer Rd, Durban CBD. Cost: R250–R500. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
morning teas. Contact: 031 205 9525 or 072 248 0008 Speak Easy For those who stutter, as well as their family and friends. Contact Imraan: 082 786 3718 or visit speakeasy.org.za
bump, baby & Tot in tow
classes, talks and workshops BabyGym A five-week course focusing on relaxing baby, waking senses and building muscles. For newborns to eight months old. Starts 30 May. Time: 10am–12pm, every Wednesday. Venue: Waterfall. Cost: R630. Contact: 083 653 6801, janet.wilson@ babygym.co.za or visit babygym.co.za Fear to Freedom pregnancy class Momsto-be are taught to create body and voice awareness and how to action one’s birth vision and needs. 18 June. Time: 9:30am–12pm. Venue: Upper Highway. Cost: R185 per class. Contact Colette: 082 354 8873, colette@ star-channel.net or visit nurtured-babies.com HypnoBirthing Expectant couples learn about this as an alternative birthing option. 6 June–4 July. Time: 6pm–8:30pm, every Wednesday. Venue: tbc. Cost: tbc. Contact Patti: 031 563 4249, patti@babyjourney. com or visit babyjourney.com Infant massage class Parents learn easy techniques. Time: varies. Venue: varies. Cost: varies. Contact Dana: 076 387 5425, email@example.com or visit nurturenow.com Infant Massage workshops Four lessons over two weeks. Time: 9:30am–11am, Monday and Wednesday. Venue: Lasting Impressions, 35 Caeffron Ave, Westville. Cost: R600. Contact: 031 267 0435, 083 661 6682 or firstname.lastname@example.org PreggiBellies Fitness classes for pre- and postnatal moms. Tuesday and Thursday evenings and Saturday mornings. Time: varies. Venue: Underground Fitness Club, Lighthouse Mall, Umhlanga. Cost: varies. Contact: 0860 723 559 or visit preggibellies.co.za Pregnancy or moms and baby yoga Learn breathing techniques, relaxation and more. Time: varies. Venue: Centre for Wellbeing, 16 Canberra Ave, Durban North. Cost: varies. Contact Angela: 076 410 1410 or email@example.com
playtime and story time Clamber Club Movement and stimulation classes for children 1–4 years old. Time: varies. Venues: branches in Ballito, Durban North, Hillcrest and Kloof. Cost: varies.
Contact Ballito: 076 222 2946, Durban North: 083 785 4332, Hillcrest: 084 577 7630 or Kloof: 083 259 2746 or visit clamberclub.com Lucky Bean A safe children’s playground, with an undercover play barn and coffee shop for parents. Time: 9am–4pm, Tuesday–Sunday. Venue: 10 Cadmoor Rd, Assagay. Cost: first child R20, second child R15. Contact Donnae: 079 893 8448, firstname.lastname@example.org or visit luckybean.co Moms and Tots and Moms and Babes workshops Designed to stimulate learning and self-confidence. Time: varies. Venues: branches in Amanzimtoti, Umhlanga, Durban North, Highway area and Glenwood. Cost: varies. Contact: info@ momsandtots.co.za or visit momsandbabes. co.za or momsandtots.co.za Toptots Children 8 weeks–4 years can join age-appropriate classes to learn and play. Time: varies. Venue: branches in Durban North, Ballito, Glenwood, Kloof, Hillcrest, Westville and Hilton. Cost: varies. Contact: 031 266 4910, 082 876 7791, info@ toptots.co.za or visit toptots.co.za
it’s party time For more help planning your child’s party visit
support groups Durban New Moms support group For moms of babies and toddlers. Time: 9:30am, every Friday. Venue: Durban North. Cost: free. Contact Alexandra: 031 562 9253 or 083 788 0689 Mothers 2 Baby For new and old moms who are finding motherhood challenging. Booking essential. Time: 10am–11:30am, every third Thursday of the month. Venue: Hillcrest Private Hospital, Kassier Rd. Cost: free. Contact Hayley: 078 640 7949
how to help Durban Care Works with two charities. You can purchase a hamper or raffle tickets. Contact: 031 309 2223 National Soup Day Denny, in partnership with FoodBank South Africa, is working towards providing a hot meal for those living in disadvantaged communities. Denny will donate 40 cents worth of soup for every Denny soup sold until August 2012 to FoodBank SA. For more info: visit denny.co.za Put Foot Rally Two ladies trek 7 000km through seven countries in 17 days, to raise funds. The Put Foot Foundation donates shoes to children in South Africa and Project Rhino raises awareness about poaching. For more info: visit pinkpanthers.co.za Pyjamas Please project Help by donating secondhand pyjamas. Contact: 083 788 6999 or visit justus4children.za.org
don’t miss out! For a free listing, email your event to durban@childmag. co.za or fax it to 031 207 3429. Information must be received by 24 May for the July issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za
on the move It rates as one of the most stressful things you can do... And moving house while heavily pregnant, is not for the faint-hearted, says ANÉL LEWIS.
Anél and Erin
ome people bungee jump for kicks, others get their adrenaline boost from rock climbing or diving with sharks. I get mine from moving house when heavily pregnant, usually in summer. Except, unlike the adventure junkies, I don’t tackle the move voluntarily or with any enthusiasm. In fact, I would rather watch The Golden Girls reruns while hanging from a trapeze than move house when pregnant. Unfortunately, our life pattern has conspired against me and I have been forced to attempt this extreme feat not once, but twice. And just for added thrills, I’ve done it in two cities.
The first move was in Johannesburg, and I was about seven months pregnant. All I can remember of that experience was the heat and the downpour at about 4pm as I scrambled to get the last of the boxes into the house before the daily thunderstorm. I could at least still see my toes, so my unpacking and cleaning capabilities were not as hamstrung as with the second move. This time, I was eight months pregnant, and very uncomfortable at the height of the Cape Town summer. Fortunately my husband did most of the packing and heavy lifting. But on moving day, I was on my feet for several hours. By the end, I was convinced that I was going to give birth on one of the moving company’s trolleys. The day started off well enough, with my husband and I packing the last of the odds and ends before the movers arrived at 9am. I was tasked with taking our Ridgeback, Vida, and her mixed-breed
partner in crime, Chloe, to the vet for a check-up while Craig did the “heavy” work. I thought I had it easy. But I had forgotten that Vida, who weighs more than 30kg, has delusions of being a contender for the next J&B Met. And Chloe, who has only one eye, semiblindly follows Vida wherever she runs. I managed to get them into the car, but by the time we arrived at the vet, they were ready to break land-speed records. As I opened the door, they bolted, leaving me standing with two pink leashes in my hand. I attempted to waddle in their direction. But when I noticed the children at the next door primary school pointing in my direction, I realised how absurd I must have looked – like a giant beach ball, marooned in the parking lot while two gregarious dogs ran donuts around me. I decided to give in gracefully. I would explain to Craig that the dogs had run off to greener pastures, and that we would
save a good few rand each month in dog food. But fortunately, a kind gentleman stepped in to help, and after about 20 minutes of cajoling and some tears, from me, we got the errant hounds into the vet. The rest of the day was spent directing the movers around the new house and keeping an eye on Erin, who was intent on climbing into the boxes as we unpacked them. When the final box was dropped off, at about 7pm that evening, I felt as if I had completed a Cape Epic and a Dusi Canoe Marathon back-to-back. And I vowed again that I would never move when pregnant. In fact, the next time I pack a box, bubble-wrap an ornament or lift a couch, the children had better be old enough to help out. Anél Lewis has now settled into her new home. Conor Sean Lewis was born on 10 April at a healthy 3,6kg. Anél has embraced being the mom of two little ones, but admits she misses the office vibe.