CEO-Mothers

CEO-Mothers A Family Business

can change a nation

FROM FINANCIAL CAPTIVITY TO FINANCIAL FREEDOM

True Meaning of

First Family Tis the

Keeping your

Season

Beauty Right

to be

During the

Thankful

Holiday Seasons

Sabrina Dutton This is me and it’s as real as it can get !

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CEO-Mothers Address: Customer Inquiries, PO BOX 196, Brice, OH 43109

Telephone: 614-829-3270 Website: www.ceo-mothers.com Email: ceomothersadmin@ceo-mothers.com Subscriptions and orders: ceomothersadmin@ceo-mothers.com “CEO-Mothers is a place where we are building a strong institution of community and of family.”

Founder and Creator LaMeka Howard

Editor LaMeka Howard

Customer Service LaMeka Howard

Advertising Sales LaMeka Howard

Art Director LaMeka Howard

Photo Editor LaMeka Howard

Graphic Designer LaMeka Howard

Contributors Sharlene Chance Brigitte Christmon Veronica Montgomery Omar Medina Films

Emma Matthew

Johari Mitchell

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Special “Thank-yous” to Photographers for photos listed on Pixaby or Unsplash

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Phillip Goldsberry Larry Crayton

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CEO-Mothers

What’s Inside Editorial

6

Seasons Change

Family

7

First Family

34

15 Tis’ The Season to be Thankful

16 Academic Family Discussion Inspiration

19 Trust God; He’ll Provide Wealth

21

21 From Financial Captivity to Financial Freedom 23 A Family Business Can Change a Nation Health & Beauty

25 Face Attraction, with Make-Up Quality, in-a-Dash Entertainment

16

27 I am CE freakin’ O CEO-others Readers’ circle

32 Our Book for the issue to Digest Cover Story: Next CEO-Mother

34 Sabrina Dutton 25

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This is me and it’s as real as it can get

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November December 2020

Contributors Brigitte Cobbs-Christmon is a graduate of Western Michigan University where she received a Bachelor’s and a Master’s Degree in Organizational Communication. She was a Creative Arts Specialist for the Western Michigan University Forensics Team. She was assistant editor of the graduate newsletter and a graduate handbook at Western Michigan University.

She is also the coauthor on the publication, “Every Breast Cancer is Different: Illness Narratives and the Management of Identity in Breast Cancer.” Her current academic research interests include Organizational Communication, Interpersonal Communication, Cultural Diversity, and Identity. She is an active community advocate and is an active public speaker. Her future includes pursuing a PhD; but for now, she is enjoying being married and is raising extremely energetic 7th and 10th graders.

Guest

Brigitte Cobbs-Christmon (M.A.) Capital University and Columbus State Community college and local business owner.

Johari Mitchell

is an educator with Columbus City Schools, in Columbus, Ohio, where she loves to empower students, families and colleagues through instruction, advocacy and support. Her mission is helping people to connect vision to opportunity through the power of words. Needless to say, life is full and life is busy! Still, she knows that connecting with CEO-Mothers is sure to add great value to her life and she’s thankful to partner with this community as a contributor.

Johari is a wife to Wes, with whom she shares two active children, she coaches writers in the community, and she is currently preparing to engage the new role of author.

Words of wisdom: Listen to God, yourself, and others.

Sharlene Chance ,Esq

has 21 years of experience as a practicing Attorney. She has worked in the private sector as a civil and criminal litigator focusing on white collar crime, medical malpractice, and patent law.

In the public sector, Ms. Chance has worked with the district appellate court and state, county, and local government. As a graduate of Capital University Law School, Ms. Chance is an experienced civil litigator, researcher and writer, mediator, and public speaker.

In 2019, Ms. Chance became a licensed Financial Professional where she dedicates her time to helping families with insurance protection, retirement income planning, estate planning and business strategies.

Ms. Chance is a veteran of the United States Army Reserve where she served as an Administrative Assistant for a military police battalion. She has previously served on the Women’s Ministry and served as a leader of the Children’s Ministry at her church. Most importantly, she loves to attend her son’s basketball and football high school games.

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Veronica Montgomery

is a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant and has been working with women for more than 6 years, with their skin-care needs, ranging from make -up, from high-lighting their skin tone, to moisturizing their skin to protect it from possible environmental conditions and sun damage.

She appreciates all things of "Beauty" and enriches a person's life with a positive attitude, encouraging words, and amazing beauty products. She enjoys showcasing skin-care products through Facebook live and other social media platforms to educate women about how to properly care for their skin and beauty.

Veronica enjoys serving meals at the local shelter with the church outreach ministry, being active in the drama ministry at her church, spending time with family and friends, and finding new resources to assist her clients' needs regarding beauty products. She has two beautiful teenagers, son and daughter, and is happily married. She resides in Columbus, Ohio, with her family.

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Editorial

LaMeka Howard, Writer, Speaker, and Editor

EDITOR’S NOTE

Seasons Change Be Ready Even When you don’t feel it.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year Andy Williams sung as a Christmas Jingle to get everyone in great spirit of cheer.

Hence are we, as a people, ready for this season?

Well if not, what I admire about grocery stores, department stores, retail stores, and hardware stores is that they happily prepare us for it. Sometimes we say, as consumers, “Wow, they already have holiday items out? It’s not even the season for it yet.” Well, they want us not to forget the holidays and accordingly prepare our hearts to get ready even when our hearts are not prepared for it. They want us to continue to celebrate with family, spend money to help sales, and to be reminded what the holiday season is all about: bringing families and friends closer together, creating memories and celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ.

We had several different seasons that shifted us from: working in the workplace, school-buildings, hanging out in-the-town with friends, shopping in malls, and eating in restaurants and pushed and elevated us to different directions this past year even when we were fearful, when we were uncertain, and when we were doubtful. These seasons shifted us to the unknown, but we had to react to these seasons and govern ourselves act accordingly. Hence, when a www.ceo-mothers.com

new season hits us, usually we have effective communication that gives us direction on how to handle it, but in this case, we were temporarily lost. Leaders, politicians, councilpersons, bishops, and employers worked tirelessly to make sure we, as a people, had the supplies and resources for our families to keep things functional and created a new norm for all of us. There were some business operations that may have had a decline in sales and there are other businesses that had surged sales because more consumers stayed home and shopped online. Overall, one of the greatest seasons, that should be for all four seasons, is the season of family—definitely this season is teaching us this lesson.

Family is one of the greatest assets to have since the beginning of time, and this season has taught us and reminded us the importance of family. We will also learn the importance of family with reading Sabrina Dutton’s story about the impact of family and what it meant to her, and her interpretation of family and how the direction of family led her to where she is at today: the family that adopted her.

Let’s celebrate this season of family, even though there may be complications because it teaches us to get back with family, support family, to care for our loved ones, to teach our children, to pray together, to stay together, and to celebrate the power of what family is all about: togetherness. Enjoy our Winter issue as we are thankful for friends, but most importantly for family.

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Family

LaMeka Howard, Writer, Speaker, and Editor

First Family: True Meaning of Family When it comes to the words First Family (FF), we either think about the President, his wife and children in the White House or the FF of the church. We see, we hear, and we say FF not realizing the importance of what FF is and how it impacts the social influence of our homes as well as within our communities. We see images on social media giving us variations of family and anticipate families will be able to incorporate those attributes in their lives. Employers encourage employees to relate to one another as family in the workplace and retailers inform customers they are like family. There have been different narratives that families can be blood or not blood, and sociologist informs that FF is labeled as Primary Family and Nuclear Family that describes specific titles of individuals and gender within the household. These titles have certain positions, and those positions play vital roles in how family is formed and the importance of family and how it transcends socialization in to the community. The question is: what do we really know about the power of First Family? Here is where it begins...

According the Webtser.com dictionary, it states that the definition of FF, a noun, means a family that has great importance, influence, or success in a specified activity or profession. Great importance? Well this means a lot of our families are important, and what we do to support and to influence our families make a deeper impact for the world. It’s about the profession, the love, and attributes that we carry in to the world.

Families that have been in the White House, fit this particular description; however, they are examples of www.ceo-mothers.com

how families should portray for society. The President of the United States and his family are similar to a King and a Queen and their children as princes and princesses. What is significant about FF is that God beautifully depicted what family is, what family does, and how family functions from the beginning of time. In addition, we will include sociologist findings about FF and how it corresponds with God’s plan.

God created man: God created man in his own image, in the image of God He created him (Genesis 1:27) male and female he created them. Although it seems as though God created man and woman simultaneously, He only created man first and eventually made women.

God made woman: Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made in to a woman, and He brought her to the man (Genesis 2:22).

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Be fruitful and multiply: Now Adam knew Eve his wife and she conceived and bore Cain.” I have acquired a man from the Lord.”

Then she bore again, this time his brother Abel (Genesis 4:1-2).

God employed them

gies describe family as a father, a mother, and a child (ren). God has shown us how FF should love, support, protect, respect, and communicate with one another.

Although sin, societal changes and social norms have made the Primary and Nuclear family transform from its original design of family, to another form of family, God still has the main instruction of how family is designed and how it should function. Today we

In the beginning, God knew what He was doing when he created His creation. The man was created first, and God spoke before creating Adam and before making Eve. He wanted Adam to work and to share the responsibility with Eve by saying, “let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth,” (Genesis 1-26). In addition, God knew that once Adam started working, he will be a provider for his spouse and they will work together based on God’s order. God instructs Adam, first, after he was created to, “have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on earth,” (Genesis 1:28). Once Eve was made, then Adam shared this information and responsibility with Eve.

have different family dynamics, single-parent, widowparent, same sex parent(s), grandparent(s), adopted parent(s) and aunts and uncles as parents taking care of children and creating family. No matter the circumstance, God loves families and He appreciates when we go to Him for guidance for everything. Rest assured if there are families that do not have both parents living in the household, that doesn’t mean God denies families. God still has a plan on how to

operate families’ lives for His Will and for His Glory.

Photo: Ian dooley on Unsplash

And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.

God blessed them

God knew that if they follow order, they will be blessed by His glory by saying to them, “See I have given you every herb that yields seed which is on the face of all the earth and every tree whose fruit yields seed; to you it shall be for food (Genesis 1:29).

We see the natural design of family of how God created his creation, advised them what they will do, how they will do it, and then rewards them for doing it. This was FF. According to sociologist, Primary Family and Nuclear Family is the current description of God’s original design of FF. These two terminolo-

Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.

Genesis 2: 21-22

“This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:23

Photo by Gus Moretta on Unsplash

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A single father or mother can still go to God for guidance on how to help build their family. It’s about praying to Him and fasting.

God will appoint people in families’ direction to support, to love, to comfort, to teach, to guide, and to assist. If God gave order for FF He will also give order for other family dynamics too. Here are basic principals to incorporate in families’ lives:

Partnership: The socio-economic position of FF is learning for the man and for the woman, who are married, and how they co-partner their household similar to Adam and Eve. In the household, parents have to work in order to provide for their families. If they do not work, they do not eat. They have to discuss their affairs, health, appointments, children activities, work -related issues, finances and spiritual beliefs. This is a generational foundation from the beginning when God spoke what His creation would do together; however, this is what some couples are doing now to support their families. On the other hand, if there are families that may not have this family dynamic, know that this method can still work.

Image by Omar Medina Films from Pixabay

He is a provider, God gave Adam a position and when Eve came, they both worked together.

A father is promoter, he increases and add values to his wife and to his family. In this case, God promoted Adam in the position of a leader and a protector as a covering for Eve as well as the birds and animals. A father is a priest that pray over himself, his wife and his children and he is a prophet because he will speak life over his wife’s and children’s future.

A Father’s Role

A Mother’s Role Proverbs:

Bishop T.D. Jakes, Senior Pastor at the Potter’s House in Dallas, TX, provided 5 things that makes a great father in one of his sermons. Those 5 things are: protector, provider, promoter, priest, and a prophet.

These 5 things are significant characteristics on what a father does for his family in order for his family to be successful. The man is the head of the home, that means he is a protector. If something goes wrong, he will protect his family. That is the reason God gave specific instruction for man before woman was made on what the guideline was so when she comes to him, he will have an idea on what he needs to do, what he needs to say (communication), how he needs to protect him and his family.

31:11.12, 13, 15, 16, 17, 20, 26, 27, 28, 30 and 31 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil All the days of her life.

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She seeks wool and flax And willingly works with her hands. She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard, She girds herself with strength, and strengthens her arms.

She extends her hands to the poor, Yes she reaches out her hands to the needy, She opens her mouth

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with wisdom, And her tongue is the law of kindness She watches over the ways of her household And does not eat the bread of idleness Her children rise up and call her blessed Her husband also, and he praises her Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, And let her own works praise her in the gates.

When parents do their part and come together as one, it strengthens their families and their households.

The Children’s Role Exodus 20:12 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”

Children when they love God, they will love their parents and family members too. This article is to show us how FF was originally designed in order to function on earth. There have been disagreements that family does not have to be blood because family can hurt us, but so can anybody else. That is the reason we have to fight by bringing families closer together similar to what the movie Soul Food taught us.

There was a lot of chaos, but after Big Mama passed away, their family came back together. It was not the death that brought them closer, but the foundation and legacy Big Mama built around family.

Photo by loly galina on Unsplash

guidance of how God orders a father’s role to operate in their homes and it’ll prevent unwelcomed events that may bring harm to their families. Bishop Jakes painted this picture for us to clearly understand a father’s purpose. Mothers can also use their guide from Proverbs 31.

If we can strategize and improve the expectation of the origination of FF or the families that we have currently, by seeking God and his righteousness, then all things shall be added unto thee. The organizational chart in God’s Kingdom is: God, FF, and then everybody else outside of the family. That means God first, family (mother, father, children) and then everyone else outside (work, church, school, etc). When family is good, then everything outside of family will be good too. This the place of comfort, surrounded We may have seen through social media of disreby the people that we share a place called home. It is spect, molestation, domestic violence, rape, verbal about togetherness, and creating the love, the supabuse, murder, envy, gossip, pain, famine, poverty, port, and the respect in our households first and then and other events that happens within FF and it is be- it will be disseminated to everyone outside our cause the FF is under a spiritual attack. This attack can homes. That is the reason we hear, “It starts at be defeated if every family member does his or her home.” There is a lot of work that may be needed in part (it’s part of the body because we are the body of families, but if we work hard at keeping family togethChrist) in doing the right thing. If fathers follow the er, the same as we do business, we can see change. www.ceo-mothers.com

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demonstrated with Ruth how she followed her mother-in-law to her country and became part of their culture, their experiences, and their belief system. Although her mother-in-law was not her blood, Naomi accepted her as family. That was her daughter, and she nurtured her and loved her, and pray to God for her well-being. God let us know that when FF rejects you, disowns you, and denies you, God will prepare a family for you that will bless you and you will be a blessing to them too. God showed us a second time with Noah and his family about nuclear family and he showed us again with Joseph, Mary, and Jesus the art of family and its meaning for His Kingdom. Although Photo by Isaac Quesada God never flooded the earth again, He created His son, Jesus, through Mary, and Mary and Joseph with Jesus’ birth. God adds value, so by Him adding a baby Gifts God showed us that when we were born, we have that will save the world, it added value to Mary to gifts, and that is shown in Genesis when we found out praise the Lord more and a people in the world for that Abel was a keeper of sheep and Cain was the till- centuries that cannot stop talking about Jesus. er of the ground (4:2). In Proverbs it teaches us that In life, you can create your family dynamics and we should train up a child in the way he/she should go and when he or she grows old, he or she will never teaching your family expectations, morals, values, love, peace, harmony, education, God, equality, ecodepart from it.

Children mirror what they see and hear their par- nomics, financial literacy, and other topics that increase wisdom, knowledge and understanding. ents do, and some times they do it better. Children are sponges that absorb their conditions of their environment, so we have to be mindful what we teach These are highlights that have been given to unthem and how it helps them for their future. There derstand First Family, what is it, how does it help soare stories of adults now, children before, of learning ciety, and how important it is for family to stick tolife situations from their parents and it either effecgether. tively shaped them for success or may have caused them to derail. God gifted children with talents and gifts, and parents are a strong contribution toward God knew what he wanted and created His FF, their success in their gifts. Some parents may allow let’s create a welcoming, healthy, and family environsocial media and television to influence their direcment to our households first before serving a people tion, but the parents and their homes is the first place of influence so when the world tries to corrupt them, in the world. It’s God, family, and then everything else. they will not be part of that experience .

Family can either be blood or not blood: God shows us that one can be adopted in to family and still receive the love that one deserves. He

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Family Overall 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

We have to make sure that when we are building and making our families, we should ask: what does God want for us to have in our families, how do we want our families to be not only within our own family, but for the world to see. Let us receive the word from God, and He will show us the way. Let us not conform to those things that are not good, but for the things that will bear fruit for generations to come. We will be able to see the fruit of our labor in how we teach our families great morals and values so we can see great things that will make a difference for all human race.

Image by HamiJeezy from Pixabay

May our families be the light to support, to love, and to share best practices on how to build families around the world in a positive way.

Photo by Larry Crayton on Unsplash

Photo by Sai De Silva on Unsplash

Photo by OC Gonzalez on Unsplash

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Photo by Sai De Silva on Unsplash

Image by Brad Dorsey from Pixabay Photo by Phillip Goldsberry on Unsplash

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Image by ncb80 from Pixabay

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Family

LaMeka Howard, Writer, Speaker, and Editor

Tis the

Season to be

Thankful We, as a people, spend a lot of time searching for the perfect family and watching them as they care, promote, and show the world their inner lives about their families, but their audience neglect their own families and dislike them because they are not the images seen on television and social media. The audience has a tendency to make derogatory statements about their own family members instead of speaking life and building the family that they are blessed with and treat others outside the home better. There is no quality time and no genuine conversations.

This is not God’s design. There are many families divided, broken, and torn because there are more outside interaction of family with other people than taking time to build bridges within our own families. Why? Is it easier to love and care for someone outside of family than it is within family? There’s no work in it.

that we can to build our current families. Take this time to create an organizational chart for your family and its hierarchy. Set goals, expectations, vision, and purpose.

Most will say it’s God, family and then everything else. Write it down and then do it for your family. Families are important because it’s their lineage, their legacy, their blood, their name, and their morals and values that are pass to every generation.

unit is oneness: one body and one mind under God. Celebrate one another because there are lot of things that are within the family that makes it special and that makes people remember what memories are specially held to bless future generations to come. Let’s put our phones down, let’s have family dinners, let’s show empathy, let’s show love, let’s show support, let’s learn our strengths and weaknesses, let’s not be strangers, let’s

Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash

What kind of legacy are we leaving behind for our families to further their future? Let God’s will be done on family as He first created in the beginning and watch the manifestation of his work come to pass.

be communicators, let’s be good listeners, let’s have conversations, let’s have family outings, and let’s have prayer together, in all things let’s give praises to God for everything.

Tis the season to be familyful and It’s encourage to take a look at thankful because family is what was what we have as a people, because systemically first of how the strucif we have family, then be blessed ture of togetherness and how tofor what we have and do everything getherness was a whole. This whole

Build families not what we see on social media, but the design that was built on the promises of God. It’ll last a lifetime. It’s a huge investment.

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Family

A F D

cademic

amily

Johari Mitchell, Educator (I say this acknowledging that even the ability to respond with their own thought takes some coaching.) And so, I interviewed both of my children. I asked them key questions about their goals for school and how they wanted to show up in their academic journey this year.

Their answers were fascinating!

I share these thoughts with you today, in the hopes that the attached questions will help you to have some empowering and directionsetting conversations with your young people this holiday season.

Potential Purpose-Building Questions for you to ask your children: • What does school mean to you?

As we near the holidays, the natural mid• What would the best school year ever

iscussion

I am that educator who we see these days on video dancing in the classroom and singing original songs to capture students' attention.

I’ve spent the last ten years working to support and motivate other educators with a similar passion. It feels like I’ve always intuitively understood the power of personal motivation in student achievement, I have not always realized that one of the most empowering and lifeshifting things adults can do for young people is to model goal-setting and self-monitoring.

Think of a game-changer whose work the world admires. It can be anyone, from science and technology to the arts to beyond. Literally, anyone. If you dig into his or her life's story and how the success we see today was built, we will find that almost everyone speaks of a seminal moment in childhood where a crucial decision point became clear. Some event, happening, or realization came that caused him or her to decide, “In the future, I’m going to…” without realizing it or maybe without even giving it a formal name> This future worldchanger either set an intention or a directional goal for his or her life. Most did not wait until being released into college and career life at age 18 to begin this process.

Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash point of the school year, I believe it will be a great time for families to come together and do these kinds of assessments to allow the young people to be a part of setting the course of a preview about their school experience.

Obviously, they cannot pick their states’ learning standards, their teachers' instructional practices or many other things. What they can pick is their mindset. They can pick which skills or topics they want to hone in on and which things they want to make their teacher aware of about themselves. They can reflect on which strengths to highlight, which character traps they intend to avoid, and how to be more than faces in the sea of [now masked] somebodies.

I started to think about this as I looked at my own children, 6 and 7, at the start of the school year. I realized that in education we have long seen students as the receptacles and teachers as the fillers. We send our kids to school trusting that the state standards and the intentions of the institution of school will be enough to give our kids what they need. Really, though, how could the institution of school meet this need?

I believe that we empower teachers to give us what we need when we are clear about what is I started to realize that I needed to increase my needed. efforts to empower my children to come to the table with their own intentionality.

As I reflect on this, I think that this was what I needed to get their dendrites jumping around my parents did for me even without realizing questions like, “What do you want out of it. By giving me a voice in the family and allowschool? What is the purpose of school for ing me to speak, that paved the way for me to you?” Even little children who can't answer this be a parent who would go to the next level and question are in danger of missing major pieces use this approach. intended for their development, in my humble opinion.

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look like to you?

What should your teacher know about you in this second half of the year?

What is something you want to accomplish in school between now and year’s end? What will you do to get there? How can your school and teachers help you?

What is something you want to accomplish in life?

• •

•

I suspect that many of our children don’t even realize they could approach school with this level of agency. However, if no other period in history has taught us this, our current times should be opening up to us doors of permission to help our children to envision school differently...to reimagine their role there...and to engage the reins. If not now, when?

and

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“I needed to get their dendrites jumping around questions like, “What do you want out of school? What is the purpose of school for you?...” Johari Mitchell

Image by edsavi30 from Pixaby

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Photo by Mwesigwa Joel on Unsplash US www.ceo-mothers.com

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Inspiration

LaMeka Howard, Writer, Speaker, and Editor

Inspirational Note Trust God; He’ll Provide

2 Kings 3:21

There was a woman that was a widow of a prophet who was left without financial support to survive for her and for her family. She was left with debt and two sons. The creditors were trying to collect the debt that was incurred, so they wanted her children in exchange of her family’s debt and use them as slaves. She needed to do everything that she could to prevent this from happening.

She first wailed out to the prophet Elisha, a noble man of God, and then explained her circumstance. He asked her one question: “What should I do for you. Tell me, what do you have in the house?” She replies, “Your maidservant has nothing in the house but a jar of oil.” For her to say, “nothing,” was negating what God already had in stored for her and what He had provided her. She had a hot commodity during that time because oil was used as perfumes, skin-care products, cooking, and anointing.

However, she didn’t see that because she was too busy focusing on her circumstance. She had more than enough to help her through her temporary challenge. That’s similar to us saying, “We only have a bag of potatoes.” We can do multiple things with potatoes, we can cook hash browns, fried potatoes, baked potatoes, and mashed potatoes. It’s in the breaking of one that can multiply.

to involve her sons to watch the power and miraculous work of God. She was able to fill all of the empty vessels that when she asked her sons for more, one of her sons says, “There is not another vessel.”

God work was done. He was able to bless her in helping her pour the anointing of the oil in each jar to fill them up.

Everyone in town may have been curious to know the reason she needed the empty vessels; hence, they may have known about her story of being a widow and in debt.

However, because they may have known her God, they were able to witness his miraculous work and change their hearts to see Him through her story.

She went back to Elisha to explain that they have filled all of the empty vessels, and he advised her to, “Go, sell the oil and pay your debit; and you and your sons live on the rest.” When we see a capital letter when someone is speaking life in to someone to perform something in the Bible, that’s God talking through that person and that’s what Elisha did to his maidservant.

Look at God, he used Elisha to explain to the maidservant that she had enough and only needed empty vessels for Elisha specifically instructed her to, “Go borrow vessels God to perform the rest by taking what she had left, mulfrom everywhere, from all of your neighbors—empty ves- tiplying it to fill her jars, showing her how to create her oil sels; do not gather just a few. And when you have come jar business, using the jars to pay off her debt, and then in, you shall shut the door behind you and your sons; then using the rest as savings. pour into all those vessels, and set aside the full ones.”

If God had taken her challenging situation of being a widWhat I appreciate about this passage is that he advised ow, preventing her sons from captivity, hearing her cry her not to get a few, but as many as she could, and they out to Him, and using what she had left and multiplying must be empty. If they were full, it wouldn’t work bewhat she thought was nothing in to something, then what cause there will not be any room to fill it. It’s like God can God do for you? Just believe that what ever you may pouring His Spirit in to the cup for our temple and if we be experiencing God has a perfect plan for you to come are full we couldn’t receive Him, then we wouldn’t be able through it. Always remember God is with you! Never to receive the blessings from Him because we have too look at your situation that you’re left in a draught; inmuch that we are not ready to let go. But God. What was stead, look at God just leading you to a well that never also important about this experience is that she was able runs dry. Trust God; He’ll provide.

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November December 2020

Wealth

BREAK

FREE

Sharlene I. Chance, Esq. Financial Professional and Estate Planner

FROM FINANCIAL CAPTIVITY TO FINANCIAL FREEDOM

Most families today live with insufficient protection and too much debt. They have little to no savings and fail to know how much money they should save to reach their goals. The reality is most families have failed to have a plan or strategy in place for their future.

Through His word, God equips us with the knowledge to faithfully manage our finances and achieve financial success and freedom. From Genesis to Revelation, there are a consistent set of lessons about wealth.1 Depending on which scholarly article or book you read, authors opine that money is mentioned 140 times in the Bible, that there are roughly over 2,000 verses on money and about 40% of Jesus’ parables deal with money; which is more than the 500 verses on prayer and faith. Looking at these numbers from a practical perspective, God has plenty to advise us on wealth, finances, saving and investing.

we have systematically blocked any blessing for education and proper planning.

I have dedicated the last year and a half to helping families understand the importance of proper financial planning. An excellent financial foundation begins with the proper education and understanding of how the financial services industry works for you. I guide families through a six-step process to reaching family freedom that can help one make better financial decision from life planning, buying that new car or home, sending their child to the college of his or her choice, to planning for retirement comfortably.

I have been practicing law for 21 years. In 2019, as I planned for my care in the event I became ill and at my death, I learned the value and necessity of proper financial planning. This included enhancing my life insurance policy, investing in long term care, learning about retirement investment options, proper education planning for my son, and preparing my estate plan (included my will, power of attorney, living will, health care directive, etc.)

When I felt the relief and peace of mind in my planning, I knew I had to share this knowledge with others. After two decades of a rewarding career as a practicing attorney, I made the decision to become licensed as a financial professional and business owner.

In my financial practice, my main objective is to reach and teach families about financial freedom. More focus is on the underserved class; specifically helping women.

We tend all too often to lose sight of who we are, what we wanted to become; all because we put others first. In our role of a spouse, mother, daughter, sister, employee, business owner, friend etc., we tend to watch our dreams fade away and look back at how much time has slipped away without much progress. We are left asking ourselves and contemplating the “would of,” “could of,” and “should of” scenarios of our lives.

Please understand that financial freedom and independence does not center around having lots of money. Consider this - the next time we encounter a pandemic or recession, which results in you experiencing an interruption in income or are laid off, why not be prepared by having a safety net in place instead of panic and disarray?

This is what financial freedom feels like!

You have the SECURITY and PEACE OF MIND – without the stress and worry. Getting to financial freedom is a process. It requires education, growth, openness and gaining spiritual and emotional strength. By discussing six important steps with families to include debt management, asset accumulation and estate preservation, I assist with breaking that financial bondage that has plagued you for so many years and help you achieve that position and peace of mind to carry out what God teaches us about managing our finances to achieve financial freedom.

As a woman, you must know that it is wholly acceptable to follow your passion, while making those wise decisions about your bank accounts, investments, life insurance, long term care and estate planning. As African American women, we grew up in households where we heard all too often “What happens in this house, stays in this house.”

Practicing what was preached, we grew up carrying this adage into adulthood, where we do not share any family business with anyone outside of the home. This for many 1 Cortines, John and Baumer, Gregory. God and Money: How reasons results in an intentional barrier to open commu- We Discovered True Riches at Harvard Business School. Rose nication. So, when it comes to talking about finances and Publishing, 2016. financial planning (among other things),

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Photo by Emma Matthews Digital Content Production on Unsplash 22

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November/December 2020

Wealth

LaMeka Howard, Writer, Speaker, and Editor

When we think about generational wealth, we, as a people, have to do our research about companies where we shop and its history. Surprisingly, we will discover some retailers started with family. Many founders, current CEOs and former CEOs had a plan, and that’s to leave their children’s children with financial stability. We can take a look at some retailers that started with family, and how they are serving their communities and how their businesses are thriving, and how important it is to see your family and what your family has to offer to this world.

A Family Business

what they enjoy doing and doing it.

can change

When Walton started his retail store, he had failure, he had doubters, and his potential investors didn’t believe, but his wife and family did. They kept following their dreams until it became what is today: one of the largest retail stores in the world. They kept the business strong, kept a strong philosophy, and kept their prices effective for people to “save more; live better.”

a nation

Knowles knew he was good at his craft, and that was sales and marketing. He would ask the right quesThe belated Samuel Walton, also known as Sam Wal- tions, and to the right people, which then gave the ton, was the founder of Walmart store in Roger, Aropportunity for his wife and his daughters and their kansas in 1962. By this time, he was married to Helen close friends to become successful. He was able to Walmart in 1943, and they had four beautiful chillearn his families’ dreams and found what they endren, Alice, Jim, Rob, and John. Today, one is still on joyed doing along with his knowledge and expertise the board of their father’s fortune, and the other of making it come to life. In the first year of them three are actively involved in other parts of the busi- opening their first hair salon, they gross close to one ness and outside community affairs, but they are re- million dollars. We enjoy listening to Beyonce’ music, ceiving residual wealth from their father’s establish- admiring her wardrobe, and her classy style. Now she ment. and her family are successfully succeeding in the muMatthew Knowles, Beyonce’ Knowles-Carter’s father, sic industry. is a marketing strategist and business owner. What is Bishop T.D. Jakes had a dream to become a great pasadmired about her father, when he was married to tor in serving his community and feeding his church Beyonce’ Mother, Tina, is he asked her what does she the word of God. In addition, he had his wife to come like to do? She replied, “I like doing hair, I like fashalong the journey. They had five beautiful children, ion, and I like style.” He thought the most important and two daughters to this day our pastors. It started thing is family, and while family is important, it’s im- with their father, and passed to his children in the portant to know what your family likes, do not like, ministry. His wife is heavily involved in women’s minand what they want to become. He remembered ask- istry to celebrate and encourage women to succeed. ing Beyonce what does she want to be, and she told Since these fathers knew what their family members her father she wanted to sing and dance. Look at wanted, they had their family members to get intheir family today: her mother is a seamstress and cosmetologist doing her daughter’s hair and clothing, volved by either teaching them and promoting them and her father is still in the music business. Her sister to succeed, and now their families’ businesses are succeeding.

Solange is in the music industry and they are living their dreams. It started with their fathers knowing www.ceo-mothers.com

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It is not about who has more money, it is what they have done to create generational wealth for their families by first starting with a conversation.

Who’s the next family in line? Take a look at your family and see what talents and strengths, and gifts they have, ask them questions about it and then see how you can help them promote it. You never know what will spring out of your seed to bring not only generational wealth to the community around them, but create better place for people to live tomorrow. On top of this, your family’s name is on it.

Walton’s changed how people shop so they can pay for items that are less, have more items purchased, and less money spent; Knowles help Destiny’s Child become successful and a people enjoy their music and Bishop Jakes created generational students, his children and of course his congregation, for the word of God that keep preaching the gospel to God’s flock that are willing to hear the message from God. In addition, we enjoy listening to not only Bishop Jake’s sermons, but now coming from his daughters and admiring how they build God’s Kingdom.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

and see what ideas, innovative solutions, and other great beginnings that could happen to change the community, schools, politics, and businesses. If it doesn’t change the entire world, at least there is something to change within your community. Don’t allow talents and gifts be unnoticed. Instead polish those gifts for something useful and meaningful because we don’t want to see them as buried treasure.

We see Mary Kay build her company Mary Kay Cosmetics and now her company is successful and her business has flourished for 59 years. It started with her and her sons, creating products for women’s skincare and now it operates to help woman not only with their skin-care and make-up needs, but being able to have financial success by becoming Mary Kay consultants. Since Mary knew what she wanted to do and shared it with her sons, her business was created.

When there are great conversations within the family, it can create insurmountable things and family has the power to make it happen.

Take this time to have conversations in your family, www.ceo-mothers.com

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Beauty and Health

Veronica Montgomery, Mary Kay Consultant

Face Attraction, with Make-Up Quality, in-a-Dash Makeup should enhance your beauty and not cover it up. When adding make-up, it should highlight your natural beauty and cover minor touches to enhance your overall look appeal. It’s about the right make-up that matches your skin-tone because it’ll definitely do the trick so it doesn't make you feel artificial but an authentic YOU! Here are some short tips to keep in mind when either looking for products to follow these steps below or finding the products that compliments your natural beauty: Natural Beauty 1). Find a product that will help you with a regular skincare regimen in order to define your glowing skin tone.

2). Use a cream based cleanser on your skin type: Normal/Dry and Combination/Oily. If you do not know your skin type, feel free to download the Mary Kay Skin Analyzer App on your phone or tablet. The application takes a snapshot of your face and suggest products to use based on your skin type, and it'll explain which one fits your description.

3). Then moisturize your skin with a moisturizer. These basic tips above will keep you looking refine, refresh, and renew daily. If you missed a day, no worries, re-start the process until it becomes a routine.

1).Use a Foundation Primer that goes on smoothly and reduces shine. A primer holds in make-up so during the day, you're not having to apply more foundation and powder.

Primer

Eyeshadow

2). Apply an Eyeshadow Primer to give your eyeshadow staying power. Your eye colors will last all day long with no smearing, tears, and wetness.

3). Apply Eyeshadow liquid or dry depending on your event look. If you're going to work, you may want to apply a more dry look but if you are going to a wedding, ball, or gala as an example, then apply a wet look.

4). Use rich fall colors like Moonstone, CC Cream

Gold status, Sweet Plum, and Merlot are all great colors. It blends with the season and forms a warm look to your day

Primer

5). Lash Intensity Mascara will makes your eyelashes look voluminous and allow your eyes to speak for the occasion

6). CC Cream with built in SPF 15 protects your eye from sunlight and sunlight rays and locks in your vitamin D to keep your skin healthy

7). Lip Gloss: Tawny Nude, soft nude, Beach bronze, Copper Aura whichever color you prefer, it adds more lush to your lips and gives your lips that scrumptious look and keeps your lips glowing but not shining.

For more tips and products, you may find and purchase them at www.marykay.com/vmontgomery109

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November/December 2020

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26

Entertainment

I am a

C E freakin’

O

:

where creativity transforms an empty space

www.ceo-mothers.com

Brigitte Christmon, Writer, Editor

That is right and I do not need anyone’s approval or validation. Yes, I have a few credentials like a Bachelor and Masters degree, community awards and I teach at a local university and I’m A licensed small business owner. But none of that prepared me for 2020. When the whole family was quarantined together with not a relative in sight for at least 250 miles. I said to myself, ‘I’m from Inglewood.’ Let’s do this. So, I as my grandmother would say, ’I pulled up my big girl panties!’ Then pressed reset on life, by starting the process of organizing, halfhearted discipline, and creativity.

ternal identity. But even though the world was crashing down around me I was still the CEO because no one can fire me from overseeing my life. I just needed to forge a new way forward. With all of us home and no one outside I thought it was a good idea to teach my daughter to drive. I began to teach my 15-year-old to drive. After one week I had an extra wrinkle on my forehead and one stubborn grey nap in the middle of my crown, so again that got old quick. I was irritated and over it. But I knew I

could not give up. Because there was more to be done after all I do have Black When the announcement came from Girl Magic, right? I could not figure out the local school that there would be no how to summon the magic? What is the school for a week AJ and Angel were so magic word or pass code? I was tired, excited. I was excited too as I thought we and I could not access the power I knew could extend spring break vacation. But my ancestors somehow stored inside of as more news about the pandemic me, so that is when I looked inside, and I flowed in, my feelings began to change. grieved for all this loss.

Not only were we not going on vacation, I stop comparing myself to others but we needed to stockpile disinfectant, and I became the CEO of my life without tissue, and protein drinks as though the a defined job description or a steady world would be ending soon. check. When I got to the place where While my kids tried to dive deep into discipline was hard, I tried to reach inside their phones, I had other plans for them. to purpose. I will teach, but I did not have It was time to catch up. I finally had time a classroom, so decided to teach the to teach them things I felt they should world and I taught my children my family have learned by now. The first week we traditions. How to make something out organized closets, and bedrooms. Then of nothing, and how to find beauty in the there was the basement and home office, small things, which is a skill I learned then there were writing activities and from my mother. long jogs in the Ohio cold weather. But As I was organizing and restoring my by week 2 I was exhausted, and I quickly catering catalog. I began to show my chilrealized I did not live up to the hype be- dren how to make fruit displays. After all ing a great mom, and all my work teach- I am still the owner and operator of Fruition Design LCC and I am The Fruit Bae. ing and outside endeavors came to a Many people host events, from watching screeching halt. a movie with friends to big elaborate exMy work identity was gone, my busi- periences. ness possibilities were dried up and now insecurity was chipping away at my maNovember December 2020

27

Photograph above: Brigitte Christmon The commonality in most events is food.

When the food looks pleasing as a host your credibility receives a boost. So here is a way to be the CFO Chief Food Officer of your party. All you need is a surface and vision (It does not have to be a table). For example, if it is a small gathering, ask questions like is there a theme and what is the purpose (every party has a purpose)? Is there a favorite color? How many people? How do you want people to feel when they leave? Then ask yourself what supplies I have access to that can create my desired outcome.

These supplies can be borrowed. Sometimes a host has a special piece that can be added to the table, like a picture or a flower. How much will that cost, then adjust the vision for your budget. It is always a nice idea to start off with a tablecloth if you are trying to improve the area or table. Some areas are naturally beautiful so adding a tablecloth could take away from the aesthetic. It is always helpful too add a base cloth for spills even if it does not drape. I recommend buying a black tablecloth. I do not like plastic but if it is plastic make it black because other colors can make the event look childish.

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You can always add a pop the specific color later. For example, I was asked to do a fruit display one hour before the event. That is absolutely unheard of, but I was bored and there was a Dollar Tree and a Walmart next to each other, so I challenged myself. While it was not my best work the table popped and was a nice touch to the small room given to the family. See Right:

C

E O

I used a family sign that I already had and two risers. Margarita cups, 3 bowls and gold wrapping paper and got a big box for free from the Dollar Tree I used a coffee cup from the hotel and a hotel plate, and bought fresh cut fruit and veggies from Walmart that I prepped and cleaned the fruit and veggies as fast as I could. The decorations were $6.00 dollars. The family loved it and I owned it flaws and all.

Below is an example of a display my children helped do for one of their friends, I usually don’t allow other items on my table but since the event was free, I allowed a cake, candy and party favors on the table. My children found the basket balls and the fun items in our house, so this table was only 13.00 to put together. The host provided the blue plastic cloth.

But what if you are the jewel of the office and they ask you to put together snacks for a meeting? The host provided the blue plastic cloth. But what if you are the jewel of the office and they ask you to put together snacks for a meeting? The host provided the blue plastic cloth. www.ceo-mothers.com

November December 2020

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Before:

What if you are the jewel of the office and they ask you to put together snacks for a meeting? You could go basic and buy a fruit tray from Sam’s Club or you can transform the space like this:

After: This required more effort and I was allowed time to be familiar with the space. I knew the sink would be a problem, so I added a riser to sit the tiered fruit on then added a few more elements form my home and the office. The problem was solved. I suppose in the last 7 months I am redefining what being a boss is to me. I had to re calibrate my goals and making big chooses even about the small things in life. I own my space and transform the atmosphere wherever I go and I don’t take for granted the rare opportunities I get to go out now.

That is why I am a CE freakin’ O wherever I go.

You may follow Brigitte decorative tips on: Facebook: @BrigitteChristmon YouTube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KknTixI0jMY

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30

Photoraph: Brigitte Christmon www.ceo-mothers.com

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November December 2020

CEO-Mothers Readers’ Circle

C

EO-Mothers Readers’ Circle

Welcome to CEO-Mothers Readers’ book club. We are excited to present to you our next book selection to encourage our readers to explore different resources that will enhance, that will expand, that will educate, and that will encourage transformation in our lives, in our communities, and in our finances.

We don’t want to inundate our readers with multiple selections; instead we encourage one book at the time so the information can digest and resonate in our readers’ minds. In addition, we allow our readers to either mail-in or email their feedback on what was acquired by the book. Our readers’ feedback may be published in a future publication because we value your opinion and helps us to start a conversation.

Book : Working Mothers Guide to Life by Linda Mason encompasses everything that we experience as mothers: full-time mother, career woman and keeping our homes and ourselves together, and still managing work and life balance.

Mason brings some helpful insight on how to hold everything together as we navigate this life of motherhood.

Purchase your copy at: www.amazon.com

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33

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November/December 2020

Cover Story

LaMeka Howard, Writer, Speaker, and Editor

Sabrina Dutton “This is me, and it is as real as it can get: Leadership in me!”

There are many stories that we There was a man, who was looking either hear, read, or see about to be a father, and heard of Saadoption ranging from sitcoms like brina’s story, and decided to adopt Fresh Prince of Belair starring Will her.

Smith, as Will, living with his aunt, He renamed her: Sabrina Elizabeth uncle, cousins and a butler with Dutton, which are the initials of her being able to occasionally see his his name, and took her home. She mother; Punky Brewster, starting no longer kept that name that she Soleil Moon Frye, as little girl was born to from a mother that adopted to a father; Different abandoned her child, but now with Strokes showing how two sons a father, that took her under his were adopted by a family after wings where he will raise and cover their mother passed away and the her for the rest of his life. Although movie Instant Family how a couhe was not married, he prepared ple, Mark Wahlberg and Rose Byreverything he possibly could to ne, played as a couple, Ellie and support his new family member: Pete, made decision to adopt chilPhotograph: Sabrina and her toddler son Jabre Sabrina. dren. They ended up adopting three children simultaneously who were siblings, but deep roots of disap- Her father had already adopted two sons, before Sabrina, and pointment and hurt were engrained in their hearts. All these knew that it was best for her to have her biological sibling, so he sitcoms and movies had sentimental parts that connected the requested to adopt her sister; however, there was another famidots from the children’s past and how it cultivated them to a ly already in position to adopt her and it was too late. He did family that created a home full of love and compassion. There not allow that one adoption to discourage him so he decided were episodes of challenges with each child or teenager that that by him adopting his two sons and one daughter, that was questioned their adoption with the why is, how is, and was it the completion of his family. The Mayor and the National Adopme. The reality is, it’s never the children that were the issue tion Society celebrated her father for the adoption of his chilbecause they cannot create themselves, but the lives that they dren. It was a beautiful ceremony which started a new chapter came from that may not have either been ready for children, in Sabrina’s family’s lives. Her father managed the life and rethey passed away, domestic violence, and other traumatic expe- sponsibility of parenthood when she was an infant until the age riences that kept them from their biological family. In this moof 11 when she was in middle school. ment, we will be able to see the light of adoption through SabriHowever, when Sabrina became older, life events with his na Elizabeth Dutton, and how she was able to survive through daughter became challenging. Sabrina faced challenges in adoption and how it taught her perseverance. school that caused her to be suspended numerous times. Her Sabrina Dutton, born as Sabrina Angel Rucker, in Philadelphia, story matched with Laura London which she explained in the PA, was born as the 5th of her siblings to her mother, who had a May 2013 Jet Magazine, “I got kicked out for being rebellious, “Repeated offense”, Sabrina explains, of having children, and ditching and doing everything everybody would be surprised I was left in the hospital without a home. When it was time for did,” (30). Dutton experienced similar experiences, of being reher mother to be discharged, she left without looking back to bellious, but in her case, it was about fighting for self-defense in her child and continued the life she always knew. The State im- elementary school. It was not easy for her. She remembers mediately handled Sabrina’s case in helping and searching for a being bullied, mistreated, and disrespected about her hair, how home where parent(s) were patiently waiting to adopt. After 6 she dressed and the fact of being adopted. Her classmates were months in a foster care home with first foster care family, she very cruel toward her: laughing at her hair styles because she was adopted at the age of 6 months. didn’t have a mother to perfect her hair; instead her

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He had a strong community of people around him such as his female cousins and aunts, and members at his church, however, some of the generational techniques did not feed void to her feelings. The last resort, which some parents bear to do is give her back to the foster care and requested for visitation rights. He kept her there for a while until he was able to better handle his daughter’s situation.

Photograph: Sabrina in grade school at age 10

father had taken every effort to ensure her hair was tactful, but he couldn’t give her pretty little pony tail look that she desired.

His aunts and cousins may not have been available all the time, so her father tried his best to ensure his daughter was presentable for school.

Her classmates did not see the work; instead they made her feel like an outcast. Although the old saying, “Sticks and stones may break are bones, but words will never hurt us,” well her in her case, the words did affect her.

Imagine having to experience this situation at the age of 11 without any sisters at home and a motherly figure to support her from a female perspective, that can be particularly challenging. Sometimes the jokes were verbally harmful that she would react in ways, that may have seen unacceptable, to release her hurt. There were constant phone calls to her father about the disruption of her behavior, from her school’s administrative office, and the teachers and staff never saw the inner hurt of her pain of what she was experiencing; instead, they cared more about the well-being of the student body. Since she became an adult, she now understands the safety of others, but from a child’s eye and feelings, the only outlet is to release the pain. Her father spent many nights and days contemplating on what he could do to support her through this difficult time, but nothing seemed to work.

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kitchen to get a doll for his daughter behind the sink, and made his move to rape her. Her foster care mother knew something was wrong, but never intervene to address the issue.

She encourages young ladies if they ever experience something that is unusual, they should speak up and speak out about it. She wants young ladies to know that someone will be available to listen and to As being a single father, he could not con- assist through this difficult time. She tinue to take time from the office and states, “There was some good homes but keep bringing her to his place of employ- extremely bad homes too. To my surprise, ment. This was his only option. While in it was not the good homes that shaped and out of foster care, Sabrina was able to me, it was my experiences in the bad learn how families managed their homes homes, where I have experienced: hunger, and how they not only treated her, but abandonment, rape, and teenage pregthe other children receiving foster care nancy.” This taught her struggle and how it felt to be mistreated, and that was one thing she learned to never do when she would have children. She knew this was not the end and there was something greater in life that met her eyes seeing a better life for her future.

She yearns for family: mother and father to make a big happy family, but this picture was never placed as a portrait on a wall in her family room. High school arrived, and Sabrina decided to change her life. She started interacting more with students that were in a higher-grade level and immersed herself around school administration.

What she admired about her and her father’s relationship is having the opportunity to be open about her adoption. She Photograph: Sabrina at age 13 in her home kitchen was reunited with her biological family while she was in foster care. She never too. Children may have felt afraid, lonely, had the opportunity to meet her father and traumatized because of their past because he died at the age of 7. She was experiences and some children may have nervous and excited about meeting her been focused on their future and not cursiblings; however, when having the opporrent circumstance. She saw her foster tunity to meet them, it felt refreshing to parent(s) either smoking weed, drinking see her family and the resemblance. A alcohol, or pretending to care. On the couple of years later, she started noticing other hand, she received love, support, preferential treatment, and knew someand compassion, and lived in beautiful thing was different. She and her siblings friendly neighborhoods. grew up in a different environment and had two different lifestyles. She made the She remembers in one of her foster care homes, with a woman, there was a neigh- choice of separating herself from them bor that had daughters. She played with and continued to live her life without them and this day, when she went to visit, them. their father asked her to come in to the 35

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She did not allow the separation of her biological family to deter her from enjoying high school activities and preventing her from exceling in her academic performance, so she joined her school’s activities such as track, dance, chess, cheerleading, and broadcasting for communication. She admired her communication’s teacher, Tiffany Bacon (also known as Momma Bacon), and to this day, they kept contact and she is her role model. She gave her inspiration with effective broadcasting communication techniques, and that sparked her interest to learn more. She became popular in high school and believed

she knew she wanted more for her family. She pursued a career in the health field as Genetic Research Specialist, at Children’s Hospital, all while raising her son as a single mother.

She states, “Raising him had its challenges to the point I was ready to sign my rights over as a parent. I was child raising a child and I am still learning how to parent.” When she received care from the Department of Human Services’ programs, it taught her financial literacy skills, life skills, and career workshops for career advancement. These were helpful classes, hence, she wished that she would have received them sooner.

Sabrina states, “Everyday was a struggle between budgeting bills, working, & having a personal life, which let’s face it, it was gone. But through all the pain, I was able to smile, learn, and grow into the person I am today. With all the worries, fear of failing, and family telling me that I’m failing as a parent, I was able to remove them from life and continue to pursue my career in the health field while raising my son.” Well, she did that too and she is still standing.

Twelve years later, her son has become an entrepreneur. He started with selling candy he received from birthday parties and selling them in school, to selling newspapers, to selling tshirts, and now he has his own car detailing business. She states, “He’s involved in everything: mock trial, school’s election, basketball and other athletic sports to keep him involved with people.” He has been seen on their local new station being interviewed by news anchors on multiple occasions and has been doing well with his business. His mother encourages him to, reinvest in his company by purchasing supplies, paying himself, and then indulge with the rest.

Photograph: Sabrina, 17, and her baby son Jabre

in building relationships and encouraging her peers around her.

There was a health-related situation that she encountered with one of her peers, who suffered from sporadic seizures, and her peer was showing signs of an attack. All-of-a-sudden her peer started shaking, and she immediately advised her other peers, from the basketball team, to help lay her peer flat on the classroom floor, place a book bag under her head, and get a spoon so she wouldn’t swallow her tongue. In addition, she advised her other peers to call 9-1-1, and to tilt her sideways so she would not choke on her foam from the mouth. That day Sabrina had raving fans on saving her peer’s life. She appreciated the compliment but felt that everyone can save someone’s life with the proper training.

Those days spending time with her father taught her something: how to be attentive to signs of others when there is a need.

When she was 18, she was preparing for motherhood. She did not plan for pregnancy but knew that she had a greater gift growing inside her that would be a blessing for her and for her family. She received insurmountable support from her high school teachers, they helped her stay on track with her academic performance for graduation, and she did it: she graduated on time. She did not stop there with her education because

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Sabrina receives accolades from colleagues and other friends and they always wonder how she manages to have a son that wants to be successful. She encourages parents not to complain about their children not knowing anything; instead, she advises them that they can teach them. Similar to what she does for son. Her son enjoys his, Jabre’s Cleaning Services, LLC and the advice that she gives him is, “There are people who are going to smile in your face, but don’t always want the best interest at heart.” She sets high standards and expectations for her son that he can have the best if he works for it.

Her expectation as a mother for her son, is to take him to visit businesses to meet business owners and to have conversations with them, understand their marketing techniques and to promote his business too. Surprisingly with his business, her biologically family has heard the good news about her son’s success and has not been a customer for him yet.

“I’m doing okay, my life is not perfect,” she says, as we began speaking about her mother. They cross paths at times on the street and sometimes her mother would not recognize her.

One day, in the grocery store she introduced her son to her mother, and he felt awkward.

She knew that was expected. She approached her and called her by her name, “Charlotte,” however, the interaction seemed unauthentic.

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She does not hold any grudges of her mother and wishes her continued success.

Sabrina was opened about being diagnosed with anxiety and depressive disorder. Her peers around her couldn’t believe she felt this way and they would say to her, “I always see you happy and never mad, and never stressed,” and she turned around and smiled.

In her mind she is saying, “See me.” Some of the causes from her stressed was based on financial stress, sometimes work, and making sure she has everything she needs for her son. Her affirmation to herself is, “Try your best to stay positive, because you never know what somebody is going through.” Employers was another important topic to share that if patients are dealing with anxiety and depressive disorder is to talk about it to your employer and for employers to listen and accommodate resources to help their employees. She encourages to let them know so they are aware and that way they may be able to assist you with your situation. Most employers have Employee Programs, from their Human Resources department, that are private to help their employees through difficult times whether is death-in-the-family, divorce, separation, abuse, rape, man-made disaster, financial despair, and mental health.

Lastly, Sabrina decided to create a Secret Samaritan Mission (SSM) by raising personal essential items for men and for women and other supplies and put them in a large zip lock bag. “In them are a pair of gloves, scarf, hats, socks, tissues, hand and feet warmers with a card with an enclosed amount of money for food.” She hopes to make a differ- Photograph: Sabrina and Jabre ence in their lives. She also states, “ I don’t know people’s journey and everyone has a story to tell but it is my duty as a human being to help those in need even when I don’t have much myself. I don’t believe that I made a change but if that small act of kindness was witnessed by a young child or adult and that makes them want to do good then maybe that small impact was worth it!”

She connected with her church and received an overwhelming experience of collecting food and preparing meals for the homeless.

What inspired her to do this was witnessing a passenger on the train that was asking for help, from someone else, and she felt helpless because she didn’t have anything to offer at the time—although he was not asking her. The bags she created for her SSM is given to those that she sees in need of help and accordingly distributes them.

In June 2020 her father retired at 70 from the Health for Mental Retardation. He was always been in the field helping people and she was excited to see his accomplishments pay off with his years of service. She is proud to be his daughter and she is thankful for everything he has taught her and has done for her. She has learned to be a fighter, even when times are tough; she has learned to defend others when they cannot defend themselves; she has learned to save lives when they are unable to care for themselves; she has learned to immerse herself around others that may be different than her, older than her, and more mature than her; she has learned to persevere even when times do not look promising; she was determined to break the generational option to give her son up for adoption; she was determined to raise a son to become a man, with her father’s support, and they are doing it; she has given back to her community to provide for the homeless that may be in need; she has helped her son become an entrepreneur with his business Jabre’s Car Cleaning Service she has been opened about her health to share with the world to be open too;

“Try your best to stay positive

because you never know what somebody is going through.”

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become an entrepreneur with his business, Jabre’s Car Cleaning Service; she has been opened about her health to share with the world to be open too; she has a career in Genetic Research at Children’s Hospital in PA, and she wants to start another foundation for children to assist them while in foster care.

These attributes of hard work and determination she received from her father and that she has within herself has shown her true leadership and determination. She is extremely grateful.

Once her son becomes older, she wants to continue move forward in a career in broadcasting and communication and wants to assist other children who may not have been able to fight for themselves while in foster care. If she was a lawyer on the playground, defending children that needed an advocate to sup-

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port them when they were being bullied, then she can be a counselor creating a talk show to help other adolescents too now. That is another way for her giving back.

Words of wisdom from Sabrina is, “Think of yourself as a flower in a garden, in order to grow you need to cut out the weeds and surround yourself with other flowers that help you flourish, feel beautiful and grow.”

You can contact Sabrina at sdutton90@yahoo.com for interviews, business opportunities with her and her son.

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