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April 16, 2014 | Volume 3, Issue 28 | Tuscaloosa, AL

www.theodysseyonline.com | @BamaOdyssey | Facebook.com/AlabamaOdyssey

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2 Editor's note

WE WANT

YOU TO JOIN THE ODYSSEY

My year as The Editor-In-Chief at The Odyssey is

coming to a close, as is my time as an undergraduate at the University of Alabama. While I’m still uncertain where the next path in my life will lead -- or even what exactly it is I want to do for the rest of my life (although

a job as the press secretary for the president or editor-in-

www.theodysseyonline.com chief of one of the many fashion bibles would do) -- I’m certain my time at The Odyssey will impact my future. I am so grateful that I’ve had the opportunity to work

with advertising and social media gurus, photographers, and hardworking, artistic writers over the course of this year. Whether you’ve been a part of The Odyssey before, have always wanted to get involved, or if this is the first copy you’ve seen, we want you to apply for the 2014-2015 term.

Who should apply? Everyone. Yes, I said it. You don’t

have to be a communications student to succeed at The Odyssey. In fact, we encourage a diverse group of Greek students to apply.

What will I write about? Freshman regrets, date

party disasters, fashion dos and don’ts, social media etiquette and more. These are just some of the articles

our writers have published throughout the year. From sports to philanthropy to fashion, The Odyssey covers

a range of topics that matter to our writers and the Greek community.

Why should I write for The Odyssey instead of

another publication? The Odyssey is a national brand

with chapters across the nation. As such, The Odyssey

is a great networking tool, giving you the ability to publish your work in a local, weekly format as well as in monthly special issues. Your work is circulated to

more than 8,600 Greek students on UA’s campus and

How can The Odyssey benefit me? When I first began

can also be found online.

studying journalism, I realized I was as good, if not

better, at writing as everyone else in the room. What

I didn’t have was experience. The knowledge of how to put a paper together, edit for AP style and content,

work with advertisers, and coordinate social media and editorial content are just some skills you’ll gain from working with us.

LINDSEE GENTRY Phi Mu Editor-in-Chief

Lindsee is a senior studying journalism. You may contact her at lbgentry@crimson.ua.edu.

THE ODYSSEY AT ALABAMA EXECUTIVE TEAM

CREATIVE TEAM

President Madeline Massey,

Editor-in-Chief Lindsee Gentry, Phi Mu Editorial Assistant Carleigh Watts, Kappa Alpha Theta Contributing Editor Bradley Bringardner, Phi Gamma Delta Social Media Director Chanse Jones, Phi Kappa Tau

Delta Delta Delta

Sales Executive Amanda Grant, Delta Gamma Justin Entrekin, Sigma Nu

Photographer Maggie Barlow, Chi Omega

OLYMPIA MEDIA GROUP 888.272.2595 | OlympiaMediaGroup.com Brittany Binowski, Managing Editor | Celesta Török-Lee, Designer

We want a representative from every house!

To apply for a writing, photography or sales position, TheOdysseyOnline.com/creative © 2013 Olympia Media Group, LLC All Rights Reserved.

The Odyssey is a private entity not associated or governed by The University of Alabama or Alabama Greek life office. The views and opinions shared in The Odyssey are those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Odyssey and Olympia Media Group.


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Scene on campus

3

FORMER CIA AGENT VISITS TUSCALOOSA KARLY WEIGEL Phi Mu

Karly is a junior studying political science and public relations. You may contact her at kdweigel@crimson. ua.edu. What do you know about nuclear weapons? Unfortunately most of us only know that they can cause mass destruction and are extremely dangerous. What we do not know is that according to GlobalZero.com nuclear proliferation has increased since the Cold War and there are currently over 17,000 nuclear warheads in the world today. This is information we should be aware about especially considering the current chaos occurring all over the world. One of the most famous spies, Valerie Plame Wilson, came to campus on March 31st to share her thoughts on nuclear weapons. Wilson worked for the CIA for over 20 years and travelled around the world undercover until her identity was revealed in 2003. Her husband former ambassador, Joe Wilson, openly criticized the government which caused Plame to suffer.

Now that she has left the agency, Wilson’s main focus now is to increase awareness of the harm of nuclear weapons. She said that she goes to college campuses because we are the future and it is important for us to know what is going on in the world around us. “We’ve gotten lucky so far,” said Wilson. “Don’t be surprised if decisions are made that you don’t agree with.”

She argues that we must get involved to prevent something horrible happening to a large number of innocent people. Wilson showed the documentary film, “Countdown to Zero”, which explains the dangers of nuclear weapons and shows many interviews with powerful world leaders on the subject. The movie also shows interviews of everyday people all around the world that prove that no one really knows what exactly is going on in the world around them. The movie was extremely eye opening. It showed that creating nuclear weapons is not exactly rocket science and materials to create them are constantly being stolen or smuggled. (You may view this movie by purchasing it on Amazon.com if you are interested.) According to GlobalZero.com, “In addition to the nine nuclear weapon countries, 59 nations possess nuclear materials and the capability to create their own nuclear weapons programs.”

Global Zero is a group that Wilson is involved in and she recommends every one to get involved. The group consists of half a million people from around the world who believe that our best and safest option is to eventually eliminate nuclear weapons completely. Their website consists of even more statistics and facts about nuclear threats and what we can do to help.

“Global Zero leaders understand that the only way to eliminate the nuclear threat – including proliferation and nuclear terrorism – is to stop the spread of nuclear weapons, secure all nuclear materials and eliminate all nuclear weapons: global zero.” (GlobalZero.org) The group has a step-by-step plan to hopefully get rid of nuclear weapons by the year 2030. Wilson noted that it is a difficult task to get world leaders to act on it but that it is worth the peace of mind. She strongly believes that the potential for mass destruction should not be our solution for national security. If you agree or want to learn more about it or want to get involved, you can visit GlobalZero.org. Also check out Wilson’s book about her career, “Fair Game”, and her book “Blowback”, a thriller.


4 feature story

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aut ut ipsam quam ut et et aperro bea dolorpo reperci assunti ncturiam, et estem fugia doloribus, occupis enihit eseque dolupis dit fuga. Ugia volore cone volore veriae velitist illorior rem quame vernate ne estrum rem at fuga. Am doluptatis eliqui aut que liquod mod et pa ni nesecae. Et quidemolor sandanderum, voloren digenda sam, eliquatur sus, sed quam eum, omnimus perunt provitius as si rem quas iduciendae quo vellorempos rem dolorest alit mo tem exero dis res ut occusap erumquiam, comnis et aut iur? Iscider iberum et hicto maiorum doluptia il explatem verferchil maximai orrumquid eos et in rendaecae volupta eprepe pa presequ iderferum con peles est voluptatur, non conecepudita voluptati voloris audi resequi consequiam que consequae culpa dolores doluptur si tem rehendaeste venditincte volo blatem sinum qui sinciis rem eicil ilit volumquo dolor rero beatem. Andunte molupid eleste verum ut expel iusapiet asimusd andanis doluptibeati cupturi buscien ectatia quod quiam eos destrum endelig nisque pro is etus volorrovid miniend isquam rem iur? Magnihi litissi consequodi occulla borestotam volorro excerro ressendi nullam seque ipisciendunt ressus. Ra ipit qui to bero comniam es et fuga. Uptatest quaturi busae. Apid quiscipiet lantus.


feature story

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Extended for a limited time! Hurry!

odis alitemped etur secto toremos illit pra intias et dunt que voluptam, sita est eos vendunditio vendel ipsum fugia volest, sitatatet arcillorio. Osandamet explabo. Namusci officil eiurem estrum dolupta tesequidus doluptatis eatibus qui nisciunt. Porecestrum fugitior as dolore peraturia sant qui unt faccabo. Olestem. Ut es quis ipienemporat lanto blaborum nonsero initium nis incte consedignam harupist, te perumque et ea nus dollant, quodita tempori atempeliqui commolorrum liquis porepudic te simus evenectur samus, coribea ruptam, sequo occusdam, acepro eos ad quas eossit et aut fugiae odi de ne quaerum unt. Temolorro tem quati optibea tibearum debistiorrum ulparum nestrum labo. Namus mosapic aborumet atemque que cuptat estibus is se volutem in net etur sit re quatiamus, explabor sed qui con cus quae pres ea apiet hit, offic te verum non pliquae. As modis vellorro odigend itatiundit lantia id qui que pro conserum venihiciet exceatem sunt. Giae cuptur? Catusame estiurionsed erume modi vollant ipidest volla sed que perum dolorerum volutem accusap erecere mostion pa nimiliq uiasit deniet rero intem harchilliqui doloreicias earunte lab im natum arum haria nobis is sum dolo ventiae comnimus acerruntur audandipsunt aribus, quo et parum hillore repre deliquid ullut et vel magnis et dolorectur

5

aut ut ipsam quam ut et et aperro bea dolorpo reperci assunti ncturiam, et estem fugia doloribus, occupis enihit eseque dolupis dit fuga. Ugia volore cone volore veriae velitist illorior rem quame vernate ne estrum rem at fuga. Am doluptatis eliqui aut que liquod mod et pa ni nesecae. Et quidemolor sandanderum, voloren digenda sam, eliquatur sus, sed quam eum, omnimus perunt provitius as si rem quas iduciendae quo vellorempos rem dolorest alit mo tem exero dis res ut occusap erumquiam, comnis et aut iur? Iscider iberum et hicto maiorum doluptia il explatem verferchil maximai orrumquid eos et in rendaecae volupta eprepe pa presequ iderferum con peles est voluptatur, non conecepudita voluptati voloris audi resequi consequiam que consequae culpa dolores doluptur si tem rehendaeste venditincte volo blatem sinum qui sinciis rem eicil ilit volumquo dolor rero beatem. Andunte molupid eleste verum ut expel iusapiet asimusd andanis doluptibeati cupturi buscien ectatia quod quiam eos destrum endelig nisque pro is etus volorrovid miniend isquam rem iur? Magnihi litissi consequodi occulla borestotam volorro excerro ressendi nullam seque ipisciendunt ressus. Ra ipit qui to bero comniam es et fuga. Uptatest quaturi busae. Apid quiscipiet lantus.


6 Self health & fitness

RELAY FOR LIFE JAKE REID

Phi Gamma Delta Jake is a junior studying business management and communication studies. You may contact him at jrreid@crimson.ua.edu. With the semester coming to a close, many students

are focusing on finals, graduate school, what job they’re going to get this summer, or even just passing a class.

I would like to ask everyone to put aside what you’re

doing and join the Relay For Life team to help support a great cause.

What is Relay For Life?

“Relay for Life” is a nonprofit organization sponsored

by the American Cancer Society that helps raise money for cancer awareness and cancer research.

Phi Gamma Delta has put together a team in order to

support the cause and has set a goal of $3,000.

I asked the team captain and Recording Secretary of

Phi Gamma Delta, Drew Janssen, a couple questions about the event.

Here is Drew’s inspirational story: Me: “Drew, what inspired you to create this team?”

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Me: “Why are you participating in a Relay For Life

Event?”

Drew: “The person I strive to be is my father. It might

sound cliché and all, but if you knew him, you would

understand where I am coming from. He always has a smile on, always has something positive to say, and is

always there for you when you need a helping hand. But when I was still in high school and barely old enough

to drive, the strongest man I knew got sick. He was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma, a type of

epithelial cancer that was spreading throughout his neck region and esophagus. To see him turn from a very

Drew: “Even though most of us feel invincible right

healthy and active man to having to fight for his life, for

of us. If not directly, then maybe a relative, or friend,

because there was nothing I could do to help him. But

now, cancer is something that has or that will affect all

every single breath he took was devastating, especially

or even a wife.”

with a positive attitude and strong faith in God, he has


Self health & fitness

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7

RELAY FOR LIFE, CONT’D now been cancer free for almost three years. My father is why I participate in Relay for Life. So that down the road if he becomes ill again, or if you do or I do, that I can

say that I have made a difference. That I gave back. That I have fought for a cure just as he had fought for his life and for his loved ones. It’s truly overwhelming to think that millions of people will be diagnosed with cancer this year. I hope you will help raise millions for them by donating today.”

Me: “Why are you continuing to participate in the event?” Drew: “Relay participants, including me, all participate because we’ve been

affected by cancer in some way, and because a Relay For Life event gives us the power to fight back. This is my opportunity to honor cancer survivors, remember people we have lost and help raise funds for the American Cancer Society.” Me: “What strides have the American Cancer Society overcome?” Drew: “Every day, the American Cancer Society helps people take steps to

reduce their risk of cancer or find it early, when it is easiest to treat. They provide free information and services to cancer patients throughout their journey. The organization is investing in crucial research to treat, and ultimately, cure all cancers.

I have signed up to walk and fundraise in my local Relay For Life event. I hope

you will consider joining my team or making a donation in support of my efforts.” Link to our team page: http://main.acsevents.org/goto/phigamua

To donate or possibly join the team, go to the link and follow the guidelines. When: Friday, April 25, 2014 at 8 p.m.

Where: Sam Bailey Track & Field Stadium

323 Paul W Bryant Dr., Tuscaloosa

Together, we can finish the fight!


8 Self health & fitness

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MY PERSONAL ODYSSEY MICHELLE MANNING Delta Zeta

Michelle is a sophomore studying public relations and marketing. You may contact her at mkmanning@ crimson.ua.edu.

When college students are looking at organizations to join, these are their top three concerns: 1. Will I enjoy myself? 2. Will it look good on a resume? 3. How will it benefit me? For me, joining the staff of The Odyssey Greek newspaper fulfilled these three points and more in ways I never imagined. First of all, with the high creative liberties, I can essentially write about whatever I want. Throughout my year on staff I have written humor, fashion, and philanthropy related

stories. By being able to pick my topic, writing stories feels less like a chore and more like an exciting project. Gathering the information for content is an adventure in itself. From learning the history of Harry’s ‘Crazy Bucket’ to getting people to let me through the crowd at Greek Sing because I’m ‘with The Odyssey,’ I’ve gotten to step out of my comfort zone to provide entertaining stories for and about the Greek community.

shoots, which I have worked on, are a great way to gain experience planning and organizing an event since we had to get the models ready, pick out the outfits, and plan the locations out. If you like photography, this paper is a great way to showcase your talent because college kids get enough of just columns and columns of text from their textbooks.

Since most of us want a ‘big kid’ job after we graduate, you may be wondering, “How is writing for a paper like The Odyssey beneficial to building a resume?” No matter what your major is, being able to write well is an important skill to have, so building a portfolio of clippings from a national publication will put you a step above the competition. I know I have a high stack of clippings now from all of my articles, so I can be selective about what I show future employers.

Finally, The Odyssey has benefitted my college experience in ways that can’t be written in bullet points on a resume. I have gotten the opportunity to meet new people all over the Greek community that I wouldn’t have met otherwise. It has also given me the chance to showcase all the great things people in the Greek community are doing, including members of my chapter. I have grown in the way I write and communicate. I have learned how taking on a challenge and putting your whole heart into a project can reap really great results.

Not the best at writing? There are many other ways you can be a part of The Odyssey’s team. In order to stay connected with our audience, we are very active on social media and are looking for people for our Social Media Team. Our fashion

I hope that after hearing my story as a writer for The Odyssey you will take interest and apply too. It is truly a rewarding experience. With a campus over 33,000, this can be your chance to have your voice heard.

Daniel F. Pruet Attorney at Law

205-345-1778

dfpruetlaw@gmail.com

• Former Prosecutor for 5 years in the Tuscaloosa DA’s Office • Criminal Defense Attorney focusing on DUI, Possession, and all other types of charges.

• Free Consultation

DONT GET A DUI AFTER THE GAME


Self health & fitness

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9

10 THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT

SUMMER INTERNSHIPS

1. Be over prepared and know the company you are interning for.

TERESA FARKAS

Many times students apply for internships just for the experience and have no idea what makes up the company.

Teresa is a sophomore studying journalism. You may contact her at t.farkas@aol.com.

Delta Delta Delta

Make sure you check out the website, products or at least the CEO’s name, so you will be prepared when you walk in the door. The more you know about the company, the more you will be aware of their needs. 2. Work casual and campus casual are two different things. You probably dressed professionally for your interview for this opportunity so continue to exhibit this behavior. You may not have to wear a suit at some internships, but make sure you are aware of the company’s dress code. 3. Get really good at emailing and using social media. As an intern, emailing other professionals and updating social media sites are most likely going to be part of your responsibilities. Make sure you know how quickly you should reply to emails and write concise tweets. 4. Make a good impression. The company you are interning for may potentially be your first job after college. If not that, they will be used as a reference for another future job or internship. If you take this seriously, it could benefit you greatly in the future. Don’t be afraid to go above and beyond to impress the company. 5. You are essentially a pledge. Remember this and live by it. If you are asked to make a million copies or go to Starbucks 20 times in one day, it must be done. Even though at times it will suck because you are most likely not being paid, you are there for the opportunity of a future career. Remember that. 6. Ask questions. Most companies understand that you are an intern, and this is your time to learn before you are eventually hired. Even if you don’t understand the task at hand, make sure you are asking questions to understand the best you can. It is better to ask questions and learn than make a huge mistake. 7. Don’t use bad language. This is a no brainer. If you use foul language around your peers, it should not enter the workplace, even if you hear other workers exhibiting this behavior. You must remember you are the intern, therefore the lowest of the low, and they are watching your every move.

8. Be timely.

You must be on time for everything and meet deadlines. If you are asked to do a task, work hard to complete it within the given time frame. You will also earn brownie points if you get it completed before schedule. 9. Monitor your growth. Keep a bullet-point list of the tasks you have accomplished and the things you have learned. You can use this in future interviews and even add it to your resume. 10. Network yourself. Now is your time to meet professionals in your career path. You are there to work for the company you are interning for, but if you show outstanding work ethic, other opportunities may arise. Don’t be afraid to introduce yourself (at appropriate times) to as many professionals as possible. It is all about building personal connections.


10 500 words on entertainment

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BUSH 2016? LET’S TALK POLITICS AND SCANDALS! JULIA JOHNSON Chi Omega

Julia is a junior studying public relations. You may contact her at jbjohnson4@crimson.ua.edu. By now, unless you have been living under a rock, you

have heard of the Chris Christie scandal. WARNING! If you have zero idea what I am talking about, I suggest you not tell anyone and Google it.

Better yet, just keep reading. Governor of New Jersey,

Chris Christie is in deep trouble. Recently, Christie’s administration has been under scrutiny as a result of the George Washington Bridge lane closure scandal. The

lane closure is speculated to have been on purpose for his own personal political advancement.

It was widely speculated that Christie would be a top

Bush is certainly a highly qualified candidate. Bush

candidate for the Republican Party’s 2016 presidential

is the former governor of Florida, and even better…

the likelihood of this ever happening is slim to none.

recently stated that he would make a decision by the

nominee ticket. After the mess he has dug himself into,

Christie recently came out with a report that cleared

his name. This report claimed that he did not have prior

knowledge of the lane closures. Who conducted the

brother of George Bush. Presidency is in his blood! He

end of the year. So, who is the race for presidency going to be between?

My bet is Clinton vs. Bush. It is HIGHLY likely that

report? A law firm that was hired by Christie. Not the

Hilary Clinton will be making an announcement very

Olivia Pope have to say about this?

have some of the top donors in the country supporting

smartest move the guy could have made. What would First rule of PR that Christie’s administration needs

to learn: “If you are in a hole, stop digging.” Pope is all about diverging the attention.

Now that Christie is pretty much off the list of the

Republican party’s 2016 presidential nominees, who is

a good candidate? There has been speculation that Jeb Bush is a top nominee.

soon. Hilary is a highly qualified candidate and will her. Clinton knows the ropes, that’s for sure. Yes, good ole Bill could be making a residency again on

Pennsylvania Avenue, but this time as First Gentleman. I personally believe that this will be a campaign to

remember. As much as I would love to see a Republican back in the Oval office, I am not sure that will be the case. Time will tell.


11 WHAT IF RUSH WERE DIFFERENT?

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CAMERON GREEN Alpha Omicron Pi

Cameron is a junior studying public relations. You may contact her at cmgreen@crimson.ua.edu. Every year, sorority recruitment at Alabama is very talked about. The topic floods into news outlets all over the country, and let’s be honest -- it’s for a good reason. As an upcoming senior and someone who actually enjoys the recruitment process, I think it’s time to shed some light on what really happens. First, we are going to pile on top of each other and fit in the door frame. Then, we are going to scream some rhyming songs at the girls to welcome them into the house. Next comes the ice water that we will give the girls and maybe even spill a little bit. Then, we will sit and chat about some trivial things such as, “Where are you living?” or “Do you know your roommate?” This is

500 words on entertainment

really just an icebreaker because who really cares about these things?

so the test of the rushees aim and team spirit will be taken into account.

What we really want to know is -- will you be involved in the house? Are you a girl who is going to embarrass us when you have a little too much to drink? Will you steal anyone else’s boyfriend? And, more importantly, are you going to drop after a year of pledging?

We also want to know about their personalities. Are they artsy or preppy? Do they have good manners? Is their laugh contagious or annoying? All of these subconscious things are found out by one night at a party.

These questions are the reasons that sorority recruitment would go smoothly if we did what fraternities do.

Then, the process of bids come in to play. If we like the girl, we will get a group of people and some executive members and take them into a room and offer them a bid. They can either accept or hold onto it and then decide.

If sororities adopted these ideas, here is how it would go: It would be a free for all, so the girls who go in and don’t want to be there, wouldn’t have to come. So, everyone is interested. That’s a good start.

After all the bids are given out, there is a wait process, and then we will find out who has accepted bids. Our hand-picked, alcohol-tolerating, polite and pretty new pledges. Wouldn’t everything be easy if this was how it worked?

Next is free alcohol. This is a good test to see if the rushees can handle their alcohol. Will you throw up? Fall over? If they can handle the alcohol, then it is a good sign. There will be an endless beer pong match,

But, by any means, we go through the process every year, and while it may be a long and challenging few weeks, it is still a necessary evil to continue the growth in our chapters.


12 Humor lol THE STRUGGLE OF 20 Junior year of college is a very thrilling and eventful year. Everyone is going out to bars, spending time with friends, and going to happy hour at a bunch of cool restaurants. Junior year is the year everyone turns 21 – but what if you aren’t part of “everyone?”

Unfortunately, I am one of those unlucky college students who does not happen to be turning 21 during junior year or even the summer afterwards. I don’t turn 21 until freaking senior year. Talk about the biggest annoyance and inconvenience in the whole world. I have a late birthday, and my parents wanted to go ahead and send me on to school when I was four years old. It was never a problem being young for my grade until I was 15 and everyone was getting their driver’s licenses and cars, and I was stuck with a permit. Oh, and of course, now. I have five and a half more months until I get to celebrate the big 2-1, and I get to spend those months watching my friends go out to bars and have all the fun without me. Even though I’m not 21 yet, I still try to keep up with my friends who are, sometimes unsuccessfully. I get so excited to

go out and then remember what a struggle it is to get into all the 21 & up places my friends go.

An ideal night out for me would start off with margaritas, and preferably a Thursday night to start the weekend off right. Knowing that my night out is going to commence with a jumbo strawberry margarita, I get super stoked, and I’m automatically in an incredible mood. I start getting ready, pick an outfit, and meet up with all my friends, and then we’re off to one of the many Mexican restaurants in Tuscaloosa. Upon arrival, I remember that because I am not 21, I will not be able to participate in the margarita festivities, so I order a jumbo burrito instead of a jumbo margarita -- because who doesn’t want to eat a massive burrito smothered in cheese? So I sit there. Sober. It sucks being the sober one around all my drunken friends, so I start looking forward to the after-dinner plans. After we leave the restaurant, we leave and head to a pregame for the bars or fraternity houses. Pre-games are always easy. It doesn’t matter if you’re underage at a pre-game because no one is checking IDs. However, the only way you’ll have any

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LAUREN WHITMAN Kappa Delta

Lauren is a junior studying public relations. You may contact her at ltwhitman@crimson.ua.edu. alcohol to drink at a pre-game is if your 21 year old friends are nice enough to buy the alcoholic beverages for you. That’s a pain for you and for them, though, so I don’t ask. You have to get them cash, drive them, etc. It’s all so much of a hassle to have a little bit of fun every once in a while. Once the pre-game is over is when your real problems arise. Do you try to sneak into the bars with everyone else? Do you go to fraternity houses with lots of drunken freshmen and maybe some sophomores you’re decently good friends with? Do you just go home because this whole “going out” idea was a waste? It’s a difficult decision. Usually when the pre-game is over and everyone is flocking out to the bars, I decide to join all the 21 year olds. However, I usually end up chickening out last minute and solemnly watch as my friends head into the bar -- unless it’s a 19 & up bar, and then I’m golden!


Humor lol

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THE STRUGGLE OF 20, CONT’D Once I get into the 19 & up bar, I use my super sneaky skills to try and drink out of my friends’ drinks without the bouncers seeing me. This usually fails, and I end up getting the drink taken away or getting kicked out of the bar altogether. Then, there’s always that off chance that ABC will be out, and then you really have to be careful when it comes to sipping on drinks underage.

ABC – they scare me. They don’t come around anywhere else I go out except in Tuscaloosa. Once you’re inside the bar, you have to keep a lookout for those little guys. They are sneaky and you don’t even see them coming half the time. Luckily, I haven’t had to take a ride in the backseat of their intimidating Dodge Chargers, but I know many people who have. Another option when going out is going to a fraternity house. I absolutely loved fraternity houses when I was a freshman. You could always find me at band parties on the weekends. Now, the only people I ever see there are freshmen who are usually falling all over themselves. I hope I wasn’t that way as a freshman, but I probably was. We all were. It’s an exciting time, for sure. Everything is new and fun, and you have all this newfound freedom that you’re just eating up. But, really, if I

show up at a party with a bunch of younger people, does that make me uncool? I won’t know anyone there anyway, so it’s sort of a lose/lose situation.

Bottom line, being 20 when all of your friends are 21 or about to turn 21 is a big pain in the rear end. Twenty-one is such a random age anyway… Come on, the new drinking age should be 20. It just makes more sense. It would make my life so much easier, and really, what’s the difference of one year in the grand scheme of things? I can’t wait to blow out all 21 of my candles on my birthday. October 1 couldn’t come any sooner. Lauren Whitman (@ltwhitman) is a junior KD at Alabama struggling through her third year of undergrad. In her spare time, she enjoys watching Netflix while eating a half-gallon of Moose Tracks ice cream and having life chats with her equally interesting best friends. As an avid animal-lover, she enjoys chasing stray cats around campus, trying to bring them home and failing miserably. Her sarcasm stems from her realistic view on life along with the witty sense of humor passed down by her loving parents. What happens next in the life of Lauren Whitman? Keep reading for tales of her adventure through college and life as we know it.

Just in time for A-Day Polo Ralph Lauren Elephant Wear

Established1964


14 Humor lol

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A TALE OF TWO GRADES: HIGHLIGHTING THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN FRESHMAN AND SENIOR YEARS BRADLEY BRINGARDNER Phi Gamma Delta

Bradley is a junior studying public relations. You may contact him at bcbringardner@crimson.ua.edu. The end of the year is as close as ever. Soon, our seniors will be closing an important chapter in their lives to embark on the new and unchartered territory known as adulthood (unless you’re one of the many should be graduates who will be taking a victory lap, no judgment here). Instead of heading to Gallettes for a college student’s favorite weekly drinking night, Wine Wednesdays, our new graduates will more than likely be headed back to their small apartments, cooking up some ramen noodles and passing out by 10 p.m. after watching Homeland reruns. Sounds rather depressing, I know. However, seniors aren’t the only ones

that are about to go through a depressing transition to the next phase. Freshmen will be growing up as well. Although a freshman’s transition to sophomore year isn’t as monumental as seniors moving on to adulthood, it is still an adjustment nonetheless. The biggest of those changes being that you can’t get away with “acting like a freshman” anymore. It is in your best interest to erase the stigma of being a freshman and take a shot at blending in with the rest of campus. We will certainly appreciate your attempts. So, because it’s the end of the year, and because our seniors will soon be moving on in their quests to conquer the world (or at least the state of Alabama), and our freshmen are preparing to graduate from college adolescence, I figured it’d be amusing to compare the 2013-2014 school year at the University of Alabama through the eyes of a freshman and a senior. Let’s start out with the beginning of the school year and work our way forward:

“Back To School, To Prove To Daddy I’m Not A Fool:” Through the eyes of a freshman: Congratulations, you’ve made it to college. Legally, you are considered an adult; however, you’re not exactly required to act like one quite yet. Your year began with an initial meet-and-greet pre-game with your new fraternity “brothers” before attending sorority bid day. The amount of beautiful women receiving their bids is overwhelming for you. Over the next few weeks, you will be spending no less than six nights out of a given week attending pledge parties with girls from nearly every letter of the Greek alphabet. Sure, you have to drive some older active members of your fraternity around, but this whole “pledgeship” thing is a breeze. You feel like you can handle this sort of lifestyle with ease. Oh, how little you know. Through the eyes of a senior: Oh Hell, the year you’ve hoped and prayed would never come has just come in like Miley Cyrus’s wrecking ball, and you can’t handle it. Instead of dwelling in the depressing thoughts of graduations, responsibility, and future income, you delve into some serious


Humor lol

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A TALE OF TWO GRADES: HIGHLIGHTING THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN FRESHMAN AND SENIOR YEARS, CONT’D drinking with your friends that you’ve acquired throughout the past three years of college. For you, bid day is now just a reminder that your glory days are over instead of holding the promise of paths unforged and endless possibilities. However, it’s way too early in the year to have a quarter life crisis yet, so you begin to think of all of the tremendous prospects that senior year has in store.

Through the eyes of a freshman: For a freshman, you were so busy at football games this semester running drinks to actives and their drunk girlfriends that you didn’t have the time or energy to keep up with Alabama football, much less the rest of the NCAA. For you, the Auburn loss hurt and the Sugar Bowl embarrassment stung, but you have three more years left of college to hopefully make up for it.

Pledgeship: The Best Time You’d Never Want To Do Again

Through the eyes of a senior: Dammit. You’ve got to be kidding me. First, we lose to AUBURN in the most ridiculous ending to a football game that I’ve ever witnessed, and then we get demolished by Oklahoma in the Sugar Bowl. How did this happen? My last year as a student, a year filled with so much promise of a National Title, turned out to be an epic disappointment.

Through the eyes of a freshman: “Get. Me. Out. Of. Here” (name that movie). Through the eyes of a senior: It kind of sucks to be these freshmen right now, but in a way I sort of miss being a pledge. There are so many funny memories and stories from that time. Who am I kidding, being on the other side of things is much better. So Close And Yet So Far Away: The Crimson Tide’s 2013 Football Season

To Ask, Or Not To Ask, That Is The Question: Date Parties Debunked Through the eyes of a freshman: Your first date party is coming up and the possibilities are endless on who you could ask. You haven’t been on campus long enough to have


16 Humor lol

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A TALE OF TWO GRADES: HIGHLIGHTING THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN FRESHMAN AND SENIOR YEARS, CONT’D gotten a bad reputation with the sorority girls, so you’re pretty set. However, there is a downside to being a freshman and needing a date. Although the girls may not know much about you, the same goes for you not knowing much about them. You may think that the girl you take to your first party may be cute and fun, but you never know what’s going on in that crazy head of hers. Beware of the crazies.

Through the eyes of a senior: Who are we kidding, you’re probably just about wifed up by now, so inviting someone to a date party is a thing from the past. If you’re not on a verge of walking down the aisle, then you’re probably not looking to be anytime soon and therefore don’t need a real date. Your best bet is to take a bottle of Jack to the party. Some may think you look lonely and depressed, but if alcohol is a depressant, then why does it make you so happy? The Academic Standpoint: Through the eyes of a freshman: For a freshman, the hardest thing they have to study for is Math 110 and English 101. Sure, you like to think that college is hard and stressful, but just wait. It gets much, much worse.

JULIA JOHNSON Chi Omega

Julia is a junior studying public relations. You may reach her at jbjohnson4@crimson.ua.edu.

Through the eyes of a senior: You wish you were still able to go out every night of the week like a freshman, and not have to worry about studying, but that’s not the reality you live in. Classes are hard and the thought of getting a job and supporting yourself is real. The lackadaisical studying habits of freshman year simply do not exist anymore, and quite frankly stopped existing midway through sophomore year. Nights Out On The Town:

Through the eyes of a freshman: You’re new to the bar scene here at Bama, and although you are able to make your own decisions on where you want to go, we older students highly encourage you to stick to Harry’s and the Red Shed. Basically, anywhere that you can get into with a Blockbuster card is fair game. Disclaimer: Moe’s, Innisfree, and Gallettes are not one of those bars. Through the eyes of a senior: It’s nice not having to worry about having a fake I.D. anymore. People always told me that being 21 would take the fun out of drinking, but many 21+ year olds have found no evidence to support such claims. 21 and ups are like tumbleweeds blowing in the wind. They’ll

venture to wherever the breeze takes them. “#SB2K14:”

Through the eyes of a freshman: Spring break as a freshman was not all that it lived up to be. For most of you, senior year of high school spring break blew your freshman year experience out of the water. Instead of venturing to some exotic location for the break, you more likely than not ended up going to Destin or Seaside. The weather was terrible and the overall experience was abysmal. If you ended up leaving Destin without getting arrested, evicted or an MIP, then consider yourself lucky. Through the eyes of a senior: Your last spring break as a college student has to be worthwhile. Never again will you have the opportunity to go on a traditional spring break again until you finally have a wife and kids, but that experience will be a complete 180 degree difference than spring break while in college. Many seniors enjoyed their vacation this year in Las Vegas, Punta Cana, and Cancun before heading back to Tuscaloosa for their last month of undergrad.


17 SOCIAL MEDIA: STILL TRENDING? www.theodysseyonline.com

CHANSE JONES Phi Kappa Tau

Chanse is a senior studying public relations. You may contact him at chansejones@gmail.com. You meet someone at a bar or in class and you want to know a little bit more about them. With less than five clicks of a mouse, or a tap on your iPhone, you can know where this person went to high school, if you have any mutual friends and what house they belong to, if any at all. Obviously, this is made possible by the all-knowing, multipurposeful Facebook. Take that same scenario and apply it to today’s 13 to 17 year olds. If they want to look up someone, they search via Instagram or Twitter. Because teens are glued to their phone, it would only make sense for them to socialize digitally on the small devices. Instagram does everything Facebook does

Ideas debate & discuss

but on an easier and more mobile scale.

It’s no secret that Facebook has been around for what today’s society would call a while. Since their launch in July of 2004, the now global company has added and taken away dozens of features. They have also set an over-arching theme of constantly evolving. You never know when you will log on to a new profile or home screen -- which reminds me, what did we do before newsfeed? Our generation, Generation X, is without a doubt the guinea pig for social media. There’s not a site that we haven’t tried. It was not long until we decided that MySpace was nothing but a creepy space and Xanga just could not compete. We helped Facebook catapult into a worldwide success and embraced Twitter and Instagram with open arms...and let’s not forget the newly crowned sensation, SnapChat. But within this hashtag-crazed world, you have to admit to recognizing happening trends, not only with our generation but across the board. Today, an average college student will

have somewhere between 500 and 800 Instagram followers; the average middle schooler has 1,400. Where we have close to 2,000 friends on Facebook, they are on the edge of 1,000.

This stems from the fact that each generation has their “drink of choice,” if you will. We will forever be the Facebook generation which ready posts links to our friend’s timeline or shares that new Buzzfeed quiz on Twitter. For the younger kids, they’re all about posting those post-prom pics for a casual 200 likes. This is an exciting time for social media and the digital world in general. After the Facebook corporation bought Instagram last year, we have played a role in the blending of two powerhouse sites. With more and more users over the age of 40 joining the social media scene, it will be interesting to see how marketers continue to target audiences of all ages with social media. The trends of social media may not be as simple or recognizable as the scrunchie movement, but it’s definitely a movement nonetheless.


18 Humor lol

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@iamdevloper: If you watch the Social Network backwards, it’s about a man gaining more friends and a girlfriend as he spends less time on Facebook. @bazecraze: Are you a cat person or a person person? @KevinFarzad: College is expensive, BUT your student ID saves $3 at the movies. So really it pays for itself if you go to the theater 30,000 times. @all_about_today: What I’ve learned

“i don’t see it!” until my mom comes and finds the applesauce for me

@BeardSpice: How to kill two birds with one stone: Step 1: throw a stone at a bird. Step 2: go pick up that stone. Step 3: throw it at another bird

@SandyEggoMonk: My signature move is not caring which one yours is. @titletown__: I dated a woman once. Most confusing twenty minutes of my life.

@AnnDabromowitz: When I’m CEO of Subway, employees will no longer be called “sandwich artists.” They will be “sub humans.”

@juliussharpe: At the very highest level of karate, they give you pants that fit so you no longer need a belt.

@iwearaonesie: my signature move is yelling “where in the fridge?!” and

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