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CSU Baseball Charlie Sheen 0-9 in Horizon in Cleveland League Page 14 Page 6

Charlie Sheen in Cleveland

‘Your Highness’ Reviewed

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TheCauldron APRIL 11, 2011

NEWS

SGA Candidates Face-off during Debate

ESTABLISHED 1929

ISSUE 12 | FREE

GLASSES-FREE

By Kristen Mott SPORTS

Viking Baseball Falls to 0 - 9 By Tim Fringer ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Factory Theatre’s EVERYMAN Reviewed By Kate Roark THE MELTING POT

Endorsing the Party for Pushing United Students Higher

Nintendo’s newest handheld offers this and more...

By Kristen Mott

By Ben Gifford

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112 • ISSUE 12 CONTENTS| VOLUME APRIL 11, 2011

Mission Statement

On The Cover

The Cauldron prints according to sound journalistic principles of accuracy, accountability, integrity and transparency-with a recognition of press freedom and student expression. It shall remain an unbiased forum in order to represent the entire campus community.

The Nintendo 3DS, a new handheld gaming device that offers glasses-free 3D technology. Ben Gifford reviews the device in this week’s feature. Graphic by Andrew Treska

news

SGA Candidates Face-off During Debate

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Pathways to NEOUCOM

Page 4

Weekly Events Calendar

Page 4

Preventing Heart Disease

Page 5

sports Baseball Falls to 0-9 in Horizon League

Page 6

NBA Playoffs Set to Begin without Cavs

Page 6

CSU Tennis Update

Page 7

arts & entertainment Concert Picks

Page 10

Your Highness Review

Page 10

Everyman Review

Page 11

The Two Gentlemen of Verona Review

Page 11

Book Looks

Page 13

Noise Inspectors

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The Cauldron breaking news

| csucauldron.com

The Staff Editor-in-Chief Reid Jackson May Managing Editor Alexes Spencer News Editor Kristen Mott Arts & Entertainment Editor Ben Gifford Sports Editor Meredith Horrigan Copy / Web Editor Justin Brenis Photography Editor Jonathan “Killstring” Herzberger Graphic Designer Andrew Treska Advertising Manager Jayson Gerbec Business Manager Anne Werner Student Media & Web Specialist Daniel Lenhart Faculty Advisor Dr. Edward Horowitz Staff Writers Samah Assad, Brandon Blackwell, Natalie Bryan, Shanette Buford, Jon Conley, Ray Danner, Peggy Giavroutas, Ariana Johnson, Pete Lindmark, Kiel Shrefler, Brian Smith, Matt Stafford, Dan Stanton, Gabriella Tomaro, Meredith Traxler, Kevin Vargo

Cauldron meetings are held every Monday on the third floor of the student center, room 339 (dept. of Student Life). Stop by or email us if interested. cauldroneditors@gmail.com The Cauldron welcomes and encourages student feedback. We can be reached via the above email, or in our offices on the fourth floor of the Cole Center (Chester & 30th).

Advertising: melting pot Charlie Sheen ‘Winning’ In Cleveland IllumiNation: Budget Crisis

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The Cauldron Endorses PUSH

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For advertising inquiries e-mail us at cauldronadvertisements@ hotmail.com or contact Jayson Gerbec at (216) 687-2270

Contact Us

Cleveland State University 4th Floor Cole Center Cleveland, Ohio 44115 phone (216) 687-2270 fax (216) 687-5155 www.csucauldron.com

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April 11, 2011

News

SGA Executive Board Candidates Discuss Party Platfor ms During Open Debate By Kristen Mott, The Cauldron News Editor Additional reporting by Dan Stanton, The Cauldron Staff Writer

Last Tuesday, the executive board candidates for SGA held an open debate in the student center ballroom. The debate covered a wide variety of topics, ranging from student involvement to campus dining options. PUSH (Pushing United Students Higher)

The main objective of PUSH is to increase student involvement and work closely with administration at CSU to ensure changes are made. Presidential candidate Rebecca Pushka stressed the importance of increasing volunteer opportunities and the number of service days. “I think a lot of people in Cleveland can use our help,” said Pushka. Besides service activities, another way Pushka would like students to become involved is through student organizations. She said that the student organization Rebecca Pushka, center in the student center presidential candidate has helped student orgs to collaborate together. She believes that students who are more involved on campus will be more likely to graduate early and on time. Dan Jakubisin, the candidate for secretary, agreed

with Pushka and added that he has chaired the student center advisory council to bring more programs to the student center, such as comedy shows and late night movies. As for the impending budget cuts, Jon Fedor, the candidate for treasurer, said that SGA does not have much say with tuition caps; however, he noted that SGA members can still voice concerns to the university and make sure that needs are being met. He stressed that students still receive the level of education that they need and said he would pressure the university to ensure that all courses are still being offered, even if professors who retire are not being replaced. If elected, Pushka said her party would work to improve the student center and make it more studentfriendly, allow tutoring locations to be put on CampusNet, and find a way for dining dollars to be used at restaurants on Euclid Ave. She said that members of her party have already worked with administrators at CSU and would continue to build these relationships. The Student Advocacy Party The slogan for the Student Advocacy party is “Available, Approachable, Accountable.” Christopher Caspary, the candidate for secretary, said that he originally joined SGA after being approached by current SGA president Mohammad Faraj. He said his party will reach out to people on an individual basis to hear their concerns and encourage them to join SGA. He stressed the need to increase community

involvement. “We want to create something where students feel part of a bigger community,” said Caspary. Vice presidential candidate Jessica Beres said that she would like to make the area more comfortable within the student center, and hopes this would encourage students to meet in the student center instead of the main classroom. Presidential candidate Moatasem Al Bitar said that he would like to educate students about the process of creating the state budget and break down Moatasem Al-Bitar, the university’s budget so presdential candidate students know where the money is going. “Access to education is extremely important and it’s the whole reason we’re here,” said Caspary. He said his party would work with administration to make sure the caps stay reasonable and funding is still available for student organizations. Online voting for the 2011-2012 Student Government executive board begins Tuesday, April 12 and ends on Thursday, April 14 at 11:59 p.m. Students will also vote for senator and judicial board candidates and the new funding method for student organizations. Visit https://sgaelections.csuohio.edu to cast a vote.

Editor’s Note Last week, we debuted a new tradition - a special April Fool’s Edition of The Cauldron. We have received a great deal of positive feedback and while we are glad you enjoyed the paper, we would like to remind all readers that the contents were 100 percent satirical. That means showing up at Lady Gaga’s concert with our fake tickets in hand would not be a good idea. Nor would searching for Dean Drnek in Euclid Commons or expecting President Obama to be rocking the student center’s DDR machine. Frankly, you’d look silly. And we’d just have to laugh. So, enjoy the laughs; avoid the concerts. And most of all, remember: when a campus newspaper prints 2,500 copies of the same two ticket barcodes on a day renown for practical jokes, they probably definitely aren’t legitimate.

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PAGE 4 / April 11, 2011

Weekly Events Calendar By Kristen Mott, The Cauldron News Editor

4/11

Campus Bible Fellowship Informational from 11 a.m.-1 p.m. in MC atrium

National Library Week kick-off from noon-1 p.m. in Michael Schwartz library JD Eicher and The Goodnights at 6 p.m. in Bar Uno

4/13 Courtesy avispl.com.

The NEOUCOM partnership provides CSU students with a pathway to a medical education.

Students Learn About Options At NEOUCOM By Kristen Mott, The Cauldron News Editor Cleveland State’s partnership with Northeastern Ohio Universities Colleges of Medicine and Pharmacy (NEOUCOM) has provided students with a pathway to a medical education. An informational session was held last Tuesday to discuss the latest developments with NEOUCOM and inform students of the various methods for applying to the school. The CSU partnership focuses on recruiting students who are interested in working as health professionals in urban settings. Students who are pursuing degrees in health professions, such as physical therapy, nursing, or occupational therapy, and want to practice in an urban community are prime candidates for the medical school. This past year, NEOUCOM added a College of Graduate Studies to their school that allows students to pursue dual degrees and master’s degrees. The campus also includes a pharmacy college. The CSU partnership provides three different pathways for students to apply to the medical school. The first pathway is a direct entry process. This pathway is for students who have completed undergraduate or post-baccalaureate coursework in pre-medical curriculum. Students who submit an application will be considered for Fall 2012 admission. The second pathway is the post-baccalaureate/ M.D. process. Students who choose this pathway complete their pre-medical and urban health coursework at CSU, and then attend NEOUCOM to complete the M.D. program. Those who apply will be admitted Fall 2013. Dr. Mark Penn, the vice provost for health affairs, said that the post-baccalaureate/M.D. pathway is useful for those who are interested in changing the focus of their careers, or who would like to strengthen their portfolio. The final pathway is the baccalaureate/M.D. process. This pathway allows students who have completed two years of coursework at CSU, and have shown an interest in urban health, to apply to NEOUCOM. If accepted, they would have a seat reserved in the school and be given early assurance that they can

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attend the school after college. “Our hope is that students come in freshman year and think about health professions,” said Penn. “It gives them a chance to mature and experience college, then figure out what they want to do.” Students must meet certain requirements to be accepted into the program. Students are expected to hold a 3.25 overall GPA in undergraduate coursework, a 3.20 GPA in biology, chemistry, physics and math, and an MCAT score of eight or higher in each subtest. All applicants must submit an AMCAS application, along with letters of recommendation. A supplemental application is also required. In addition to academic requirements, students must also display an interest in urban health. “The ideal is not just to learn about urban health and medicine, but about the neighborhood, health disparities in the community, and challenges to health,” explained Penn. Urban health courses are built-in to the curriculum at the medical school. Penn noted that NEOUCOM is beginning to look at establishing additional clinical sites in Northeast Ohio. Michelle Cassetty Collins, the executive director of the Office of Admissions and Student Services at NEOUCOM, explained that the admissions office is looking for students who provide service to their neighborhoods and those who want to practice in urban communities once they receive their degree. “Community is very important to us at NEOUCOM, not just for students but also for the staff,” said Collins. “We want people who are involved and who help the community.” About 110 medical students are admitted each year. The next application cycle begins this June. Students must be a U.S. citizen to apply. The early decision deadline to apply is Aug. 1 and the regular decision deadline is Nov. 1. NEOUCOM currently serves 19 counties in Northeast Ohio and is located in Rootstown, Ohio. For more information, contact Cheryl Laubacher at 216-687-9231 or at c.j.laubacher.edu.

“Two Koreas: Past, Present and Future” from 5:30-7:30 p.m. in SC ballroom CSU Jazz Combos at 8 p.m. in Drinko recital hall

4/14

Mehndi hand painting from noon-1 p.m. in SC atrium

Noon@Nance: Effective Use of Social Media from 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. in UR 254 SGA informational session from 5-6 p.m. in UR atrium

4/15

Martial arts demo from noon-1 p.m. in SC atrium

“The Legal Evolution of Professional Golf and Tennis” from noon-5 p.m. in Moot Court room SGA Senate meeting at 5 p.m. in LB 242

4/16

Do-Gooder Day from 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Meet in SC atrium

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Dr. Esselstyn Jr. from Cleveland Clinic Explains Health Benefits of Switching to a Plant-Based Diet By Kristen Mott, The Cauldron News Editor Dr. Caldwell Esselstyn Jr., director of the Cleveland Clinic’s Cardiovascular Disease Prevention and Reversal program, spoke at Cleveland State last week to discuss a nutritionally based method to prevent and reverse heart disease. Esselstyn has conducted research for 20 years, which is the longest study of its kind in this field of research. His results show that switching to a plantbased diet dramatically reduces the chance of cardiovascular disease. Esselstyn explained that heart disease is a foodborne illness. Other cultures, in which its members survive on a strict plant-based diet, are usually free of heart disease. Studies have found that at a young age, men and women who follow a Western diet of foods high in fat, were found to already have coronary heart disease established. A majority of males and females who are 65-years-old suffer from cardiovascular disease. Esselstyn said a Western diet leads to an increase in cell stickiness, which causes the blood to slow down. White blood cells become filled with oxidized particles and plaque begins to build up in the arteries. These conditions make patients prime targets for heart attacks, strokes and heart disease later in life. He noted that patients who consume a high-fat diet will suffer early effects as well, such as chest pain and difficulty breathing. The current methods for treating heart disease are medications and medical procedures. Esselstyn said that these methods serve as a temporary patch job. There is an increasing failure rate with the passage of time, as more patients return to the hospital for addition bypass surgeries. He stressed that cardiologists are relying on these quick fixes instead of addressing the real issue: diet.

Switching to a plantbased diet dramatcially reduces the chance of cardiovascular disease.

“This is an industry that’s a little out of control,” said Esselstyn. Esselstyn said that part of the problem with the Western diet is the availability of fast food and crash diets. He cited one study in which students who ate breakfast at McDonalds were causing massive damage to their cells, as opposed to those students who ate cereal for breakfast. “That single meal had so injured those cells that they could not dilate their arteries,” explained Esselstyn. He continued to say that crash diets can also injure cells and deprive the body of essential nutrients and vitamins. Esselstyn then turned to his own field of research. He explained that the principle way to prevent heart disease is to break away from the Western diet. His nutrition plan includes raw/uncooked vegetables, fresh fruit, limited refined sugar and white flour, no meat or poultry, and no oil. In addition to healthy eating, he said individuals should exercise regularly and avoid smoking tobacco or drinking alcohol. Esselstyn has conducted a large quantity of research over the past two decades. In one study, he found that women who added raw vegetables to their meal had a greater number of progenitor cells. “The results showed strikingly higher amounts of healthy cells in those women who ate five additional vegetables daily,” said Esselstyn. He said that in patients who ate a plant-based diet, both their good and bad cholesterol levels dropped. The diet can strengthen the cap that protects arteries as well as prevent

“The results showed strinkingly higher amounts of healthy cells in those women who ate five additional vegetables daily.” -Esselstyn

Dr. Caldwell Esselstyn Jr. explains how a plantbased diet can help prevent heart disease. the onset of heart disease. Esselstyn admitted that the diet is hard for some individuals to follow, but once they notice a change in weight and no longer experience chest pains, they find motivation from within to continue with the diet. He also noted that after about eight weeks into the program, the fat receptor in the brain eliminates the craving for fat. Esselstyn has published his findings and his program regiment in a book titled “Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease.” Esselstyn received his bachelor’s degree from Yale University and his master’s degree from Western Reserve University. He has followed a plant-based diet for the past 26 years.

Students enjoyed food courtesy of Mustard Seed Market & Cafe.

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April 11, 2011

Sports

Vikings Baseball Falls to 0-9 in the Horizon League By Tim Fringer, The Cauldron Contributing Writer

Photo: Brian Smith

Anthony Sambula pitched the whole game against Valpo on Friday.

The CSU baseball team endured another tough weekend, as they were swept by Valparaiso in a three game series. The first game of the series was a battle as the game went into the ninth inning tied at one. However, the Crusaders were able to pull out the victory when Bobby Martin hit an RBI single in the top of the ninth, followed by a two-run double later in the inning. This gave Valpo a 4-1 lead that they wouldn’t relinquish. The Vikings recorded seven hits, but were only able to plate one run, as they continued to struggle on offense. “Right now we’re just not executing offensively,” Coach Kevin Kocks said after the game. “We were in this game until the end, but scoring only once isn’t going to get it done.” The Vikings scored their lone run in the fifth inning when Alex Johnson hit a fly ball to centerfield that was dropped by the Crusaders’ Chris Manning. The error allowed John Calhoun to score and Johnson to reach second base. The Vikings had a chance to extend the inning when Anthony Sambula hit a single to right field, but the coaches decided to gamble and send Johnson home, where he was tagged out by the catcher after a strong throw. That was the last good scoring opportunity CSU had the rest of the game as they were unable to muster any more run support for Sambula. “Anthony did everything we asked him to do,” said Kocks. “Scoring takes

pressure off the pitcher, and we didn’t do that.” Sambula took the loss despite pitching a complete game and striking out seven batters. The lack of offensive production would continue to be a problem throughout the weekend as the Vikings fell in the other two games 12-2 and 6-1, respectively. “Our offense is struggling,” Kocks said. “We weren’t able to string together hits. We need to find that spark to get the offense going.” The Vikings were out of the game early in Saturday’s doubleheader. The Crusaders took an insurmountable 6-0 lead by the second inning. CSU had a chance at the second game until the ninth inning when Valpo pushed their two run lead to five. To be fair, it is unreasonable to expect the Viking’s offense to be able to keep pace with the 12 hit, 12 run onslaught by Valparaiso in the second game of the series. The issue does not seem to be getting runners on base, as they usually have close to the same amount of hits as their opponent. Instead, their constant struggles on offense stem from their inability to hit with runners in scoring position. Many of the players on the team have shown flashes of their talent throughout the season, but until the offense is able to produce more than one or two runs a game, the team will continue to fall short of its potential. The losses drop the Viking’s overall record to 6-22 and 0-9 in the conference. Their next game is on April 12 at home against Eastern Michigan, who they defeated earlier in the season.

NBA Playoffs Set to Begin Without Cavaliers

Without familiar favorite in the fold, who should Cleveland fans support? By Samah Assad, The Cauldron Staff Writer

Courtesy: Getty Images

Kobe Bryant

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It’s strange to think about the Cavaliers not being in the playoffs. In fact, it’s difficult to remember the last time they were anything less than the second seed. Cleveland, I know it’s unsettling. Our team was on top for so long, and for once we have to sit back and not be involved. It hurts, but we must move on. Despite the sadness of not seeing the wine and gold compete in mid-

April, I’m almost positive the Cavaliers aren’t the only team you’ve been following. If they were, I’m sure you were forced to pick a second favorite, considering the Cavs’ troubles this season. All you hardcore NBA fans out there have had your eyes on that one team who you believe is going to go all the way. With the regular season coming to an end and the postseason drawing near, the question is this: On April 16, who will you be rooting for? With exceptions of a few teams, not every series match-up is definite right now. But we can make predictions, can’t we? We’ve seen these teams play all year, and we can guess, based on record, who’s going to emerge triumphant in the end. But this is crunch time, people. The air, the atmosphere, is different. This is nothing like regular season. Say it with me now: play-

offs. This year is going to be interesting. Teams that you’ve seen get knocked out of the first round seem to have a full head of steam, and teams that you’d expect to get to the finals could quite possibly get bumped. Here are my thoughts (and hopes): True Contenders: L.A. Lakers (55-24) & San Antonio Spurs (61-19) Both teams have had their ups and downs this year with unexpected losing streaks, but the Black Mamba (Kobe Bryant) is ready to strike yet again. The Lakers are fully loaded at almost every position, and I see it being Spurs Continued on Page 7

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Men’s and Women’s Tennis Both Defeat Raiders

April 11, 2011 / PAGE 7

By Meredith Horrigan, The Cauldron Sports Editor

Men’s Tennis is now 11-7 overall and 5-0 in the Horizon League. The 5-2 win over the Wright State Raiders continues the Vikings’ win streak against Horizon League teams to 30. First singles Yannick Goosens and sixth singles Matt Ford were the only players to take losses. Rob Fox, Matt Kuelker, Chris Klepatz, and John Haley each earned points for the team. First doubles Fox and Haley and third doubles Ford and Kuelker also contributed wins (9-7 and 8-6, respectively). The duo of Klepatz and Goossens were not as fortunate; they lost 8-3. Saturday, the women traveled to Wright State, who they defeated 6-1. The Vikings’ record improved to 9-11 overall and 4-1 in the Horizon League. First singles, Catrine Bjerrehus was the only player to lose. Alex Bush, Kara Sherwood, Maria Lazaris, Alex Power, and Mengdi Liu all came out on top of their Raider opponents. In doubles play, all three duos were victorious. Bush and Power won 8-1 as first doubles. Bjerrehus and Lazaris won 8-2. Also, third doubles, Sherwood and Liu won 8-4.

Photo: Brian Smith

Sophomore Maria Lazaris was one of many singles and, with partner Catrine Bjerrehus (not pictured), second doubles to win. Continued from Page 6 vs. L.A. in the Western Conference Finals. San Antonio is ranked no. 1 in the league, and although the Lakers have had the upper hand (3418 against Spurs in playoff history), Tim Duncan is back with a vengeance in the Spurs’ line-up to push Pau Gasol around in the clash of the power-forwards. This means war. My Picks: Derrick Rose and the Chicago Bulls (60-20) clinched the no. 1 seed in the Eastern Conference this Friday with a victory over the Cavaliers. But they didn’t get comfortable despite their secured playoff spot. They defeated the Orlando Magic on Sunday, 102-99. Rose finished with 39 points; he will give the Bulls the edge in the final seconds of any playoff series. If a team wants to get past Chicago in the playoffs, shut down Rose. Keep him out of the paint. End of story. Oklahoma City Thunder (53-26) is the underdog that I love to root for. There’s so much talent there; Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook are always a treat to watch. They can make it past Denver, the Trailblazers, or even the Mavs. But the Lakers or Spurs are going to be waiting

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for them, and although we can guess who closes out the series, it’ll be highly competitive and close. Who’s Going To Choke: The Boston Celtics (55-25) made a huge mistake trading a great big man and defensive player, Kendrick Perkins, and it’s going to hurt them. Paul Pierce is a liability both offensively and defensively, and Ray Allen’s hot hand is cooling down every year. Of course they have one of the best point guards and power-forwards in the league, but as a whole, they look tired. And old. Kevin Garnett’s days are numbered. Next please. Miami Heat (56-24) has a weak mentality. And no, I’m not just saying this because they tend to boo-hoo in the locker room. Or maybe I am. Either way, they buckle under pressure. They also don’t have a legitimate big man. Chris Bosh is softer than toilet paper, and who exactly is their point guard? Mike Bibby? Dwayne Wade and LeBron James may be two of the best players in the league, but when the final seconds clock out who’s going to take the last shot? And who’s going to miss it? Figure that out and let me know.

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PAGE 8 / April 11, 2011

3D

Nintendo’s newest handheld offer By Ben Gifford, The Cauldron A&E Editor

Innovation

Whether you love or hate the company, Nintendo remains technologically innovative. The Nintendo DS handheld popularized touch-based gaming, which is now a standard on smart phones. In 2006, the Nintendo Wii introduced motionbased gaming to the masses. Selling over 84 million units worldwide, the popularity of the console is undeniable. To put things in perspective, the PS3 and Xbox 360 have shipped about 47 million and 50 million units respectively. In a similar trendsetting vein, the Nintendo 3DS is somewhat of a technological marvel. It’s the first widely available product to offer glasses-free 3D viewing. The 3DS uses an autostereoscopic parallax barrier to create the illusion of a three-dimensional image. It may sound complicated, but all it means is that there is a barrier in place to block certain pixels on the screen from each eye. The 3DS displays two slightly different images at the same time, and each eye sees one of the images. It’s the same way that eyes work naturally. If you recall the old View-Master toys, the 3DS operates on a similar concept. There is no way to convey in print the impressiveness of the effect. It works well with one drawback. The handheld must be viewed almost completely straight on. Moving the 3DS closer and farther away is fine, but tilting the system to the left or right can cause the user to see a double image.

The Hardware

It’s a little bit thicker than a DS Lite, but the 3DS looks elegant nonetheless. The top screen is the only one with a 3D display, but the screen has been widened from the DS design, and the display is vibrant and clear. The screen has a slider nearby that adjusts the 3D effect, adding depth to the effect or turning it off completely. Graphically, the 3DS has received a significant upgrade over the DS, displaying graphics on par with the Wii. The sound quality on the 3DS has been substantially improved. Game music on the 3DS sounds much better than it on the DS, both with headphones and through the built-in speakers. Nintendo added a circle pad above the traditional d-pad. Functionally, it’s similar to an analog stick. Nintendo included three low-resolution cameras on the 3DS. Two are on the outside for taking 3D photos, and one is on the inside for taking photos of the player.

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To store photos, music, or other files, the 3DS includes a 2GB SD card, and accepts cards up to 32GB in size. One of my biggest complaints is the relocation of the start and select buttons to just below the touch screen. Their placement feels far away from the circle pad and the face buttons. What makes it even worse is that the power button sits where start and select used to be. I had one occasion where I tried to pause the game and accidentally turned it off instead. In between start and select sits a “home” button. This works similarly to the home button on the Wii, but with an added benefit. The home button suspends the active software. Most of the other programs cannot be accessed while the software is suspended, but there are a few. One is a note-taking application that could be useful for some games. A friend list can also be accessed. Even though the 3DS still uses hard-to-remember friend codes, it’s nice to see an effort at improving online play. The 3DS takes a big hit in the form of battery life. While playing original DS games or without 3D activated, the battery life should be six to eight hours. With 3D activated, the battery life drops to anywhere from three to five hours. There are some third-party solutions that will be available in the future if extended battery life is a necessity. Unfortunately, some 3DS consoles are already receiving error messages. Without warning, the screens turn black and the system must be shutdown. If this keeps occurring, Nintendo recommends sending the handheld in for free repairs.

When playing the 3DS, each eye sees a slightly different image, creating the illusion of a 3D image.

GLASSES GLASSES GLASSES GLASSES GLASSES GLASSES GLASSES

The On-board Software

One of the coolest things about the 3DS is the software that the handheld comes pre-installed with. 3DS sound is a music player that supports MP3 and AAC files. It could get the job done, but it’s not ideal. Browsing through files is somewhat sluggish and there is no way to organize by song artists. 3DS Sound allows the user to alter a song’s pitch and speed, as well as add a few effects. It makes for a fun diversion, but the 3DS’ headphone jack is on the side under the bottom screen, which would leave the headphones sticking out obtrusively in a pocket. Thankfully, 3DS sound is the weakest pre-installed program. Face Raiders is a fun game that shows off the augmented reality potential of 3DS games. Both sets of cameras are used to capture people’s faces. The faces turn evil and begin flying around the environment, using the exterior cameras to make it appear as though the player is looking through a window. AR Games is another impressive built-in program. Each 3DS comes with a pack of cards. One of them has a box with a question mark on it. When playing AR Games, the 3DS’ cameras follow the location of that card and turn your tabletop into a virtual play environment. The neatest program that comes with the 3DS, potentially, is Street Pass. When 3DS is closed but not turned off, it goes into a low-power sleep mode and keeps wireless communications open. Anyone else who also has a 3DS communicating wirelessly will show up in the form of a Mii, the cartoonish avatar introduced with the Wii, on your handheld.

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D

April 11, 2011 / PAGE 9

ers glasses-free 3D to the masses

ES-FREE ES-FREE ES-FREE ES-FREE ES-FREE ES-FREE ES-FREE

It will be interesting to see if many retail games use the coin or even the Street Pass feature. Nintendo also promises to make a Web browser available through a future update, and Netflix streaming will arrive in early Summer 2011. It seems that at the very least, Netflix will offer 3D trailers for streaming on the 3DS.

The Verdict

One of my biggest concerns about the 3DS is Nintendo’s escalating pattern of handheld releases. In 1996, seven years after the Game Boy launched, Nintendo released the Game Boy Pocket: a slimmer, lighter version of the original system. Two years later, the Game Boy Color was released. That’s three iterations of the Game Boy. Nintendo followed suit with three iterations of its next handheld: the Game Boy Advance (2001), Game Boy Advance SP (2003) and Game Boy Advance Micro (2005). Nintendo released four different models of its folThe Mii will introduce him or herself and will aslowing handheld, the DS: the original (2004), DS Lite sist you with two mini games. One involves collecting (2006), DSi (2009) and DSi XL (2010). puzzle pieces to complete 3D puzzles. Each Mii that Unfortunately, there’s no way to tell whether these you meet will give you one piece of your choice. handheld revisions are simply technological advances There is also a simple role-playing game included or if they are part of Nintendo’s marketing strategy. called Find Mii. In this game, your Mii is kidnapped In January 2011, Nintendo President Satoru Iwata and held prisoner. It’s up to the Miis that you meet claimed that the company has no short-term plans for through Street Pass to fight through a dungeon and anything like a 3DS Lite. rescue your Mii. Let’s hope so. It could have some really cool social implications, At $250, the 3DS is as expensive as the Wii was but unfortunately I have only met three others in Street when it was released. Though the system seems very Pass, and they were all on the same day. capable, it currently lacks any must-buy games. If it’s difficult meeting others, players can also The Wii had a similar drought of quality titles spend coins to buy puzzle pieces, hire mercenary fight- when it was released, and it arguably was never ers in Find Mii, or unlock items in AR Games. solved. The 3DS has a pedometer that is active while it’s At the time of publication, the Wii only has 11 sleeping. Every 100 steps taken will earn another coin, titles with a metascore of 90 or above and only four of up to 10 per day. those games are exclusive to the Wii. Compare that to the Xbox 360 (35 titles with 90+ score, 7 exclusive) or the PS3 (29 titles with 90+ score, 6 exclusive), and it’s somewhat disheartening to be a Wii-owner. Hopefully the 3DS does not suffer from the same problem. It shouldn’t; the DS built an extremely strong library of games during its seven years of existence. With such a drain on battery life and the somewhat restrictive viewing angle, I’ve resorted to spending most of my time with the 3D effect turned off. It’s not that I don’t like it. It works really well and is not very strenuous on the eyes. Although it’s impressive, the 3D effect just isn’t necessary for anything Playing AR (Augmented Reality) Games causes so far. the actual environment to change when viewed The 3DS is not a must buy at this point. Quality through the 3DS’ cameras. Archery, one of the AR games are currently scarce and Nintendo has not yet games, is shown here. Players must actually move launched a downloadable store for the system. the handheld around to search for targets

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With some patience, the library of titles should grow, and the price will drop eventually.

MINI-REVIEWS Pilotwings Resort Pilotwings Resort is only the third title in Nintendo’s 20-year-old Pilotwings series. Reviving a somewhat lesser known series with a 3DS launch title is a risky move. Similarly to its predecessors, Pilotwings Resort allows players to choose from three different vehicles— an airplane, a rocket belt and a hang glider—with slight variations on each. It probably only takes about four to five hours to complete all of the missions. Some players will want to strive for perfect scores, and this could add some serious length depending on that player’s determination. In spite of being a somewhat bare bones experience, Pilotwings Resort is an enjoyable game that adequately showcases the performance of the 3DS.

Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon: Shadow Wars Surprisingly, this is easily the strongest launch title for the 3DS. Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon: Shadow Wars forgoes the typical shooter format of previous Ghost Recon titles. Instead, Shadow Wars opts for a turn-based strategy format similar to Advance Wars, Fire Emblem, or Shining Force. Shadow Wars’ fundamental gameplay is simple enough for a casual fan of the genre, but deep enough to hook an experienced player. After completing missions, players can upgrade their soldiers. Though the upgrade system is extremely linear, there is some flexibility as to which characters receive upgrades when. It’s definitely fun to unlock new weapons and abilities. In addition to the campaign, there are unlockable skirmish missions that are standalone scenarios unique from the story mode. Unfortunately the only multiplayer option is a local one, passing the system back and forth, but the single player is meaty enough (40-60 hours) to make this a strong purchase.

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10 csucauldron.com

April 11, 2011

Arts & Entertainment

Your Highness

Medieval Stoner Comedy Doesn’t Quite Measure up to ‘Pineapple Express’ By Brandon Blackwell, The Cauldron Staff Writer

Danny McBride (Right), co-wrote the script with Ben Best and steals most of the thunder.

Exceptionally crude and simply mediocre, Your Highness provides enough toilet humor to suck laughs out of even the most sober moviegoer. Danny McBride (Pineapple Express, Eastbound & Down) plays Thadeous, the pot-smoking, flunkee son of a medieval king. Thadeous is an embarrassment to the kingdom. He lives in the shadow of his older brother Fabious (James Franco), the strapping and chivalrous heir to the throne. Fabious is seemingly the only one in the kingdom who has high regard for Thadeous and even invites him to be the best man at his wedding. On the day of the royal nup-

tials, which Thadeous ditches in favor of smoking the “pineapple express,” Fabious’ bride (Zooey Deschanel) is kidnapped by a powerful and sexually creepy wizard named Leezar (Justin Theroux). When Thadeous returns to the castle stoned, the king demands by threat of exile he quest with his brother to rescue the damsel in distress and destroy the insidious wizard. The brothers head off and along the way team up with warrior Isabel (Natalie Portman), who shares in their encounters with a five-headed monster, a stone labyrinth and the film’s dirtiest and best bit —a Minotaur phallus. Continued on Page 13

Concert Picks of the Week By Jonathan ‘Killstring’ Herzberger, The Cauldron Photography Editor

It’s an interesting little stretch coming up, cats and kittens. The trend of aging punk rockers making their way to our fair city continues: Mike Watt hits the Grog, and The Reagan Youth are coming to Now That’s Class! The Reagan Freaking Youth, I say! Morning Teleportation is a quirky little band you’ve probably never heard of, but they’ve toured with the Flaming Lips, and that was a pretty good fit. Speaking of indie music, The New Pornographers are one of the most danceable pop bands

in existence; this one’s not to be missed. Also, D12 is coming! By which I mean, the Detroitbased rap group that Eminem oversees like a loving shepard, not the polyhedral dice used in Dungeons & Dragons. A Bullet for a Pretty Boy is a lovely little christian post-hardcore band from Texas—Melting Pot Editor Alexes Spencer recommends them highly, and I concur. They’re playing with Vanna & Our Last Night, so if you’ve got a bandanna you’re not using, wear it and go have a Moshing Good Time, I say!

Other Shows of Note:

Killstring’s Pick:

Peelander-Z w/Anamanaguchi, 30.80 @ Beachland Ballroom

Okay, this one requires some explanation. Basically, it’s three Japanese dudes in brightly colored jumpsuits, claiming to be aliens—from the planet Peelander no less— and playing bouncy, weird, super-happy J-pop-punk. And it’s actually rather fantastic. I know, I know, but have some faith in your ol’ pal Killstring. I flat-out dare anyone to leave this show in a bad mood. Do you like antics? Do you like loud, fast music? Do you have 10 bucks on you? If you can answer “yes” to all three questions, you could do a lot worse than make a visit to the Peelandean Embassy, which in this case is the Beachland.

4/11 Mike Watt w/The Missingmen, The Lawton Brothers, Restless Habs @ Grog Shop, $10 4/12 Our Last Night w/Vanna, Arsonists Get All The Girls, A Bullet for a Pretty Boy @ Peabody’s, $14 4/12 Morning Teleportation w/Extra Medium Pony, In Silent Movies @ Beachland Tavern, $8 4/13 Average White Band @ House of Blues, $21 4/16 Daikaiju w/Lords of the Highway, Wolfboy Slim @ Now That’s Class, $5 4/16 KT Tunstall w/Robert Francis, Miggs @ House of Blues, $25 4/17 Floor w/Doomriders, Forged In Flame @ Grog Shop, $12

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4/18

4/19 Beachland Presents: Papadasio @ Grog Shop, $10 4/21 Grog Shop Presents: Crocodiles w/Library Time, Beach Stav @ Beachland Ballroom, $10 4/22 Hollow Drive w/Hopes Held High, Sweet Asylum, Conceded, Chasing October @ Peabody’s, $12 4/23 The New Pornographers w/The Walkmen @ House of Blues, $25 4/24 D12 w/Trick Trick, Young Buck @ Peabody’s, $15 4/24 Reagan Youth w/Stress Bombs, Punching Moses, K.G.B. @ Now That’s Class, $10

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April 11, 2011 / PAGE 11

EVERYMAN

A Bold Retelling of the English Mortality Play By Kate Roark, The Cauldron Contributing Writer EVERYMAN is about a guy who’s literally named “Everyman.” He is the combination of all men: the good, the bad and the ugly. He is good deeds, and he is greed. He is discretion and the five wits. One day, Death comes along and says, “It’s time to die!” and Everyman says, “Wait a second!” The rest of play focuses on a whirlwind of characters Everyman encounters. It’s hard to talk about the plot without giving too much away suffice it to say that EVERYMAN may not be for huge sports fans or binge drinkers. The main characters’ costumes were outstanding, especially Death and Riches. When I walked in five minutes before the play started, I saw Death hanging out right next to the door and it scared me enough to yell, “Expecto patronum!” After protecting my friend and myself from a kiss of

death, we enjoyed Penance’s costume as well. Even though it made me feel a bit strange, I liked it in a “guilty pleasure” kind of way, to be perfectly honest. The lighting was another thing about the play that was spectacular. I remember seeing lighting in the Broadway production of Pippin that was very similar. There were blues, purples, greens and whites that jetted out from all angles of the ceiling. But be careful. Riches’ costume blinded me at a few points when one of the jewels caught a glare. The actors did a fair job, I must say. The character Everyman (played by Lawrence Charles) had a voice like velvet that almost melted me. Riches was just something else. She kind of reminded me of old, old, OLD Hollywood. Continued on Page 12

Courtesy: Kate Miller

(L to R) Margaret Ford-Taylor as God, Kailee Shaver as Death, Lawrence Charles as Everyman.

The Two Gentlemen of Verona

Shakespeare Suffers The Wrong Side of Modernization By Jon Conley, The Cauldron Staff Writer I often wonder what’s left to be said about Shakespeare. I mean, the man’s been dead for a very long time and, as such a dead man, has run dry of works to

be released posthumously. That is a contemporary fad, and as a contemporary stage producer, how does one expand on or make relevant the works of Shakespeare? Is it necessary? Not really. Shakespeare writes with intention in lines. The mere recitation of the language is the essence of his every work. To spruce or jag the production is always going to be an afterthought seen as second level. Here in lies the problem Courtesy: Roger Mastroianni with The Two Valentine’s servant, Speed (M. A. Taylor, left), explains the Gentlemen of workings of the female mind to Valentine (Neil Brookshire).

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Verona, now at the Hanna Theatre. The show begins in a nuanced fashion. Not bad. It’s probably not just this writer, but Nick Drake’s “Pink Moon” can fashion itself into the heart of anyone with an ounce of sentiment in them, and you’d be hard-pressed to find someone with the patience for live theater who lacks in sentiment. The flitty nature of the former almost assumes the latter. So the chorus (made up of those playing lesser roles in the acts) begins with a performance of “Pink Moon,” with outfits resembling some hipster-throwback, French mime collective. All in all, a risky move, but the song choice was spot on. The platonic love story of the friendship between Valentine and Proteus ensues. It’s not the Bard’s most staggering work of genius but a clever and often touching romantic comedy nonetheless. Scenes commence with lackluster, but somewhat solid performances from the leads. The females in the play were par-

ticularly entrancing and endearing, but with Shakespeare as long as you remember your lines you have a pretty good shot at being successful. The only downfall of the actual telling of the tale was that of extreme overacting in delivery—Paul Hurley’s Proteus. This overacting as one of the troup members in The Complete Works of Shakespeare (Abridged) lent itself to the comedy well, but in true play context it was somewhat pompous and amateur and reminiscent of a yet-maturing actor. Though the wardrobe is slightly odd at points (Valentine resembles a French literature student version of Indiana Jones), it’s not enough to completely turn you off. But then came the rest of the music. Yes, music. Unnecessary, indulgent, rickety in-performance music. After “Pink Moon”, the rest of the choices (which were unfortunately stuffed in between every scene) resem Continued on Page 12

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PAGE 12 / April 11, 2011 Gentlemen Continued From Page 11

bled songs of Lilith Fair rejection. Nothing was recognizable until the female vocalists chopped up scenes with auditory aching versions of Regina Spektor. It was this displaced and misguided attempt at modernization that crumbled walls. The mixture of all of this made the play tired and over-worked. And it’s a damn shame too, because this play has the prowess for some powerful comedy, but it was buried in a desperate attempt to be hip and relevant and new. In the end, it was the comedic support beams of this play that made one able to sit through its entirety. M. A. Taylor, genuinely funny as “all of the females” in The Complete Works..., showed his chops of comedy once again as Valentine’s’ servant Speed. His every line was to be relished, especially when it was banter with Proteus’ servant Launce (a convincingly snarky David Anthony Smith). Both playing the role of fool, their simpatico and authentic performances managed to make the rest of the play look just that. Foolish. In the words of Valentine of Verona, “Love is a mighty lord.” So is Shakespeare, my friend. The Two Gentleman of Verona runs until April 23 at the Hanna Theater. For showtimes and ticket information, visit www.greatlakestheaterfestival.org

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Everyman Continued From Page 11

When I say that I mean that she was convincing, but I was white knuckling my seat thinking she was going to walk off the stage right into the chair next to me. Penance was good; yet he seemed to be singing his lines, which both was confusing and intriguing. One of the characters really caught my attention: the angel. In actuality, she’s a young girl no more than eight with the voice of a younger Katy Perry. Her costume was adorable, and she delivered her lines with just as much gusto as her older colleagues. She was so cute! The stage was also set up in an interesting way. It definitely complimented the play’s theme, yet it left little room for the actors to interact in a smooth manner. It also forces some of the

actors literally into the audiences’ laps. I don’t know if that’s your thing or not, but if it is, you’ll be in good company. The artwork was detailed and complimented the play’s time period very well. I have to say, this play made me a little uncomfortable at times, but it was extremely well done. It’s kind of a guilty pleasure it seems. I promise you, when you see it, it won’t be what you’re expecting at all. For anyone one with an interest in theater, or just an interesting story, EVERYMAN is worth your time. Show times for EVERYMAN are 8 p.m. every night from Tuesday, April 12 until Saturday, April 16 and 2 p.m. on Sunday, April 17. Tickets are $10 for general admission and $5 for students, seniors and CSU faculty and staff. The Factory Theatre is located at 1833 East 24th Street, between

Chester and Payne avenues. Opening night ticket holders can enjoy a complimentary catered reception on April 12. In addition, patrons on Friday, April 15 can opt for dinner and a

show. For more information or to purchase tickets, visit www.csuohio.edu/theatre, or call the Factory Theatre Box Office at 216.687.2109.

4/10/11 11:56 PM


Book Looks By Meredith Traxler, The Cauldron Staff Writer Mini Shopaholic By: Sophie Kinsella The Rundown: Rebecca Brandon, an unapologetic binge shopper, has passed her love of high-end fashion and overspending to her 3-year-old daughter, Minnie. Rebecca is forced to give up her addiction to luxury brands when her husband, Luke, asks her to adjust to the faltering economic climate. Rebecca struggles, but she attempts to please her husband. In a surge of will power, Rebecca pledges to try to wear everything in her closet at least three times and until doing so, will not shop. Minnie takes no lead from her mother; she remains as spoiled as ever. Rebecca tries to control her toddler and tries to throw her husband a spectacular party on a very small budget. Afterthoughts: A light and humorous read. Rebecca has this childlike innocence about her; her honest remarks are very funny. Although the plot is about as meaty as a celery stick, the gorgeous imagery that the author uses makes it feel like you are flipping through the pages of InStyle. War Child: A Child Solider’s Story By: Emmanuel Jal The Rundown: At the age of 7, Emmanuel Jal leads a relatively peaceful life with his mother, father and three sisters in a small village in Sudan. Political turmoil and a Civil war force Emmanuel and his family to abandon their home and seek refuge somewhere else. In a violent village raid, Emmanuel is separated from his mother and sisters. Tragically, they die and Emmanuel is left on his own. He and thousands of other young boys are “drafted” into the rebel army. There, brutal training and sheer inhumanity are used to transform children into killers. Miraculously, Emmanuel escapes to the U.S. and pursues his passion of rap music. In this memoir, he retells the story of his escape and success after fleeing the rebel army. Afterthoughts: A rare find! Readers are lucky to find a honest and simple memoir. Would highly recommend. Will inspire you to think about global issues.

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Noise Inspectors

April 11, 2011 / PAGE 13

By Ben Gifford, The Cauldron A&E Editor Acid House Kings - Music Sounds Better With You

Peter Bjorn and John - Gimme Some

The name “Acid House Kings” is misleading. One might expect heavy dance music, but the Stockholmbased group creates simple and elegant folk/pop music and has plenty of female vocals. It’s almost impossible to deny the craft of the band’s fifth album, Music Sounds Better With You. The songs are extremely mature and full of hooks. Opener “Are We Lovers or Are We Friends?” uses horns and synths to drags the listener in. Julia Lannerheim’s vocals shine on “Would You Say Stop?,” a simple, but ridiculously catchy and optimistic song. The acoustic-driven “There is Something Beautiful” offers one of the more tender moments on the album. If there are any shortcomings on Music Sounds Better With You, it’s that most of the songs fall within a similar tempo and the album starts stronger than it ends. It’s also somewhat short, but that makes it a quick, worthwhile and easy listen. Rating: A-

Gimme Some is an album for anyone who likes intelligent pop music. The three Swedes sound like they’re having a lot of fun, and it’s very hard to not share in this fun while listening along. The tracks on this album are fairly straightforward and catchy, but with enough interesting arrangements to keep the listener coming back for more. This is pop music done right. “Dig a Little Deeper” could be two parts Vampire Weekend, three parts PB&J, with just a twist of the intro theme from Disney’s Talespin. “Second Chance” has a rocking stop/ go riff and an excellent cow bell. Peter’s vocals have never sounded stronger than they do on “May Seem Macabre.” Peter Bjorn and John may never recapture the success of their single “Young Folks,” but they don’t necessarily need to. If their future career path is laden with releases as strong as Gimme Some, the band will leave a legacy that will speak for itself.

Cold Cave - Cherish the Light Years

Cold Cave’s sophomore release is a bit of an odd duck. It’s a poppy take on their darkwave, synth-filled, post punk sound. Though it’s mostly brilliant, there are places the album stutters. Album-opener, “The Great Pan is Dead,” is somewhat monotonous and abrasive. Thankfully, the next five tracks are all fairly strong. Whether it’s the slow and echoing “Confetti,” or the noise-infused “Icons of Summer,” the bulk of the songs here sound like forgotten gems from the 80s. Unfortunately, on “Alchemy and You” Wesley Eisold’s vocals turn from campy to obnoxious. It’s a shame, because the song is enjoyable, especially with its lo-fi horn sample. Cold Cave’s sound will certainly divide listeners, but fans of the band’s first album, or anything from The Cure to New Order should be pleased. Rating: B+

Rating: A Your Highness Continued From Page 10 The medieval fantasy elements in Your Highness are cliché and unimaginative, save for the aforementioned five-headed monster, which is cleverly controlled by the five fingers of one of the film’s villains. So-so special effects are not what anyone planted in front of Your Highness came to see—the real draw is McBride’s deadpan vulgarity and there is plenty of it. McBride delivers his f-bombs with signature gravitas and they often result in hilarity. Unfortunately, the coarse language is so free flowing that by the film’s third act the audience is desensitized and yearning for something with a little more wit. Perhaps some of the visual effects budget was misappropriated. It would have been a wiser investment to hire writing help for McBride (who cowrote the script with Ben Best). Franco and Portman, who are both flying high after this year’s Oscars,

Wiz Khalifa - Rolling Papers Rolling Papers is an interesting listen. It’s a somewhat dynamic album that is at times energetic and partycentric, yet also introspective. Even with an appearance from Too $hort, “On My Level” outstays its welcome. Thankfully, the excellent “Black and Yellow” follows. Even it’s an unofficial anthem for the Steelers, the track is still worth several listens. The centerpiece of the album is the dreamlike “The Race.” It’s unexpected, but completely welcome. It’s sure to get Khalifa a few favorable comparisons to Kid Cudi. Unlike Kid Cudi, Khalifa’s tracks are more immediately accessible and a little more polished. Lyrically, the album is mixed. There are moments of brilliant wordplay, but the content is generally straightforward. Not that this is a bad thing. Picture Kid Cudi without the mental issues or pretense and you’ll have a good picture of Rolling Papers. Anyone who is a fan of the genre should be pleased. Rating: B+ fail to bring anything to Your Highness that couldn’t be replaced. Portman is merely a straight woman among fools and her comedic moments are fleeting. You may miss them if you don’t listen closely. Franco, does have his moments, but never realizes the comedic potential he flexed in director David Gordon Green’s previous film, Pineapple Express. Franco clearly gets the film’s second-rate jokes. All the best are saved for McBride. The double entendre of “Highness” is played upon early in the film, but the weed humor fades just like the real thing. I would be remiss if I didn’t mention this audience will enjoy the movie more than most, but those expecting witty burnout humor will be left dry. Your Highness is clunky action, discounted fantasy and mostly funny toilet humor co-mingling in medieval times. That’s not to say it isn’t worth partaking in Your Highness.

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14 csucauldron.com

April 11, 2011

The Melting Pot

The articles published in the Melting Pot are solely the opinions of their authors 14 and do not necessarily represent the views of The Cauldron.

Charlie Sheen ‘Winning’ in Cleveland Story and photos by Brian Smith, The Cauldron Staff Writer/Photographer

Above left: Marquee sign announces Charlie Sheen Live at State Theatre on April 5; above right: Charlie Sheen sports an Indians hat outside State Theatre following his live show; bottom left: Charlie Sheen meets with fans; bottom center: Fan holds baseball autographed by Sheen; bottom right: Sheen meets with fans and reporters as bodyguards stand by. Last Tuesday Charlie “Wild Thing” Sheen made his appearance at the State Theater for his “Violent Torpedo of Truth Tour.” Sheen appeared for a last minute sellout crowd, and it wasn’t known if Sheen would receive boos like he did on his first date in Detroit, or end up with a standing ovation like he received at his Chicago show. Turns out that he was more than good enough to go for more than “two and a half” shows on his tour. He left to a thunderous and loud applause that this reporter could hear from the entrance of the State Theater. I learned from talking with the audience during intermission and after the show that Sheen left many happy. A middle age woman who is most likely old enough to be my mom, who for safety reasons will be referred to as “warrior princess Susan” was a definite winner from that nights’ show.

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Susan took off her sweat shirt and threw it on stage during the show, only to have Sheen take off his own shirt and toss it to her. She was completely ecstatic. “I love smelling his shirt, and I’ll be sleeping in it for the rest of my life,” said Susan, “Warrior goddess princess love that bad boy warlock, Go Charlie!” Seeing and talking to the fans of Sheen was like being at a Ratt concert 25 year ago. Most, of course, were pretty trashed, but all came to party. The weirdest sighting of the night and the one that will get the white trash award was a couple that brought their two preschool-aged sons to the show. I can’t say much since my own parents are just like Kenny’s from South Park. But, having their two little guys freeze for an hour and a half after the show, only to have Sheen sign a baseball for their mom seemed like something from a Dr. Phil episode I’ll see soon. At the end of the night driving home, I couldn’t

help wondering if Sheen was just putting on an act. I won’t deny that Sheen has most likely done drugs just like I won’t deny that Paris Hilton has seen a few guys. In all honesty, it just seemed like he wanted to go on Celebrity Rehab, only to find out that he wasn’t going to make money. He must of decided that going on tour and attempting to trademark his phrases would make him some serious dough from a lot of gullible people. Despite his mad beatnik ramblings, he is one savvy businessman. But, if this is an honest cry for help and a way to sell a bad boy image, Sheen and his followers are surely enjoying the rocky road to public redemption. For more information on the tour, visit www.charliesheen.com. If you missed his Cleveland stop, the closest available dates are April 14 and 15 in Toronto.

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April 11, 2011 / PAGE 15

IllumiNation: More Budget Challenges to Come By Reid J. May, The Cauldron Editor-in-Chief A divided federal government made a budget deal at the 11th hour on Friday night, ending speculation that the government would shut down over failure to pass a continuing resolution for the remainder of the fiscal year. Conversations between the Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-Ohio), Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) and their respective caucuses have been the leading story since the inauguration of the new Congress. This fiscal year, Congress has passed seven continuing resolutions, the most recent a two-week extension to fund the government through March 18 and a three-week extension through April 8. A long-term resolution to carry the nation through the end of the fiscal year was long overdue. The deal agreed to by Boehner, Reid and the White House will slash $38.5 billion from the federal budget, funding through this fiscal year, ending September 30. The Obama administration took an aggressive stance on policy riders, which were a key part of the original proposal. Two of the biggest were provisions removing federal funding for Planned Parenthood and another limiting the impact of the Environmental Protection Agency’s regulatory power. Boehner had been insistent that the Planned Parenthood provision remain, but Obama and Vice President Joe Biden made it clear in a late meeting that exclusion of the provision was non-negotiable. Biden, according to Politico, told Boehner that they would take it to the American people – and that Republicans would suffer for shutting down the government over an ideological issue. The focus will soon move to debate over the debt ceiling, which mush be raised to prevent massive defaults on federal loans. With extremely polarized caucuses, that attempt could be even more challenging. As mentioned, this continuing resolution was long overdue. For nearly two months, Congress has done little other than debate the merits of slashing domestic spending. For those members of the controversial ‘Tea Party’ deep and lasting cuts were the only viable option. Some, especially the White House and Democratic Senate leadership advocated careful protection of important programs, fighting hard to maintain funding and avoid what some called ‘dramatic cuts’ in the early going. Boehner, to his credit, managed the two extremes well. His caucus often threatened to rebuke a spending bill that failed to make significant headway. On the other

Speaker of the House, John Boehner (R - Ohio) speaks about the budget. side, a willing White House still had basic expectations and made clear a resistance to controversial policy add-ons. This debate is not going away. Next year, on the verge of a presidential election, significant debates like this will become more significant, as each party will want to make clear its own stance on long-term issues. No issue is of more concern long-term than the fiscal state of the union. Leadership made a wise choice in this round, separating controversial policy mandates from the already difficult debate over spending reductions. There is near universal consensus that responsible spending choices must be adopted; regardless, the specifics of those decisions will always impact estrange someone – thus, contention will reign.

The Cauldron Endorses the Party for PUSH

By Kristen Mott, The Cauldron News Editor

The role of holding an office within SGA comes with great responsibility. The officers serve as a liaison between the students and the administration, listen to student concerns and ensure that CSU administration considers the needs of students when creating new policies. With the current school year coming to a close, the time has arrived once again to elect new SGA executive board members. Below is my endorsement for the Party for PUSH (Pushing United Students Higher). PUSH is composed of Rebecca Pushka as president, Dan Jakubisin as secretary, and Jon Fedor as treasurer. All three members of PUSH have been actively involved within SGA, which I believe will enhance their skills as executive board members. Pushka was chosen by SGA as the Director of Community Outreach. Through this position, she has created monthly service days at the Lakeside men’s shelter. If elected, she would like to increase the number of service opportunities for students, which would increase student involvement on campus beyond the annual Make a Difference Day and Do-Gooder Day. Jakubisin has been a member of the university judicial board and has worked closely with current

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treasurer Eli Auerbach to develop the budget and monitor expenditures. He is chair of the student center advisory council and will work with them to bring more entertainment events to the student center. Fedor also assisted Auerbach to create the finance committee ballot language and has worked closely with the finance committee and their various forums. Although both parties running in the election have similar ideas in their platforms, such as increasing student involvement and finding ways to work around the budget cuts, members of PUSH have already begun to work with administration to ensure that their ideas are put into effect. The members of PUSH met with Kathleen Mooney, the assistant director of campus support services, to discuss the idea of using dining dollars at various restaurants on Euclid Ave. and around campus. This innovative idea would give students more flexibility with their meal plans. They also met with her to discuss the parking situation at CSU, and will continue to work with her to find new parking lots for commuters and to fine-tune the tiered parking plan. PUSH has many ideas about increasing retention rates and would like tutoring locations to be listed on

CampusNet so students have easier access to tutoring locations. Pushka has met with Corinne Webb, the interim vice president for enrollment and student affairs, to discuss this possibility. I have full confidence that if elected, the members of PUSH will serve the needs of the students at Cleveland State. They have gained invaluable experience from working within SGA and they will be able to apply these skills to their roles as executive board members. Their innovative ideas, along with their goal of bringing more entertainment to campus and increasing student involvement, will bring great change to CSU. Their already close relationships with administrators will encourage these changes to actually be implemented, instead of just naming them as goals for the distant future. For more information about the Party for Push, visit http://www.pushsga.com. Editor’s Note: It should be noted that The Cauldron’s own Editor-In-Chief Reid May is a member of the SGA Senate. We would like to assure readers that he had no involvement in this endorsement.

4/10/11 11:56 PM


THE COOLEST JOB FOR CSU STUDENTS Office of Diversity and Multicultural Affairs presents

A Salute to CSU Black Graduates Classes of 2010-2011 FRIDAY, APRIL 22, 2011 CSU Wolstein Center at 7:00 p.m. Guest Speaker Senator Nina Turner State of Ohio 25th Senate District

Tickets: $15.00 For Ticket Purchase and Information Telephone: (216) 687-9373 Or Visit us in Rhodes Tower 1254 Deadline April 15, 2011

Home City Ice Co. Walton Hills, OH

Hiring for route delivery and packaging 30 minutes from campus. Flexible scheduling around classes. Full or part time year-round positions. Career opportunities possible. Earn $8 to $14 per hour. Apply early, positions fill fast. Call, 800-376-5388 or visit homecityice.com to submit information for the plant nearest you.

Electronic Surplus

Wide Variety of Inexpensive Electrical-Electronic Parts Relays, Motors, Switches, LED’s, IC’s, Connectors, Transformers, Test Equip, Computer Parts, Solenoids, Resistors, Capacitors, Fuses, Breakers, Wire, Cable, Power Supplies, Chargers, More

8755 Munson Suite #6, Mentor, Ohio Call (440) 205-8388 or Visit Store Hours M-F 11AM–3PM, Sat 10AM–1PM

www.electronicsurplus.com

Present this CSU in-store ad and receive 25% off all in-store items in retail area. Expires 9/30/11.

Issue 12 - 4_11_11_MASTER.indd 16

4/10/11 11:56 PM

4_11 CSU Cauldron  

4_11 CSU Cauldron Spring Semester

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