Jack and the Rainbow
Jack and the Rainbow By Claire Lior Rosenfeld
nce upon a time there was a boy named Jack, who lived with his Mother.
They lived on a farm in Ireland where they used to have a business. Now they just have one old cow, Watery Black. Jack and his family had owned Watery Black since Jack turned five. The problem with Watery Black was that she hadn't produced milk for over three years. Jack loved her with all his heart and wouldn't let her go.
Watery Black was useless. One day Jack's mother sadly said, "Jack go tothe market and sell Watery Black for the best price." So, Jack took his cow to the market. When he got there Jack and Watery Black watched a group of local Irish Jig Dancers. At the end of the performance the main dancer asked, "Can I buy this cow for a rainbow sprout?"
"Sure!" Jack exclaimed excitedly and gave her his cow. He ran home happily and could not wait to tell his mother about the rainbow sprout. But when he got home and told his mother, she was not happy at all. She didn't believe him and said he was out of his mind. She threw the rainbow sprout out the window and sent Jack to his room. The next morning Jack looked out the window and saw beautiful colors everywhere.
He couldn't wait to tell his mother. He ran downstairs. When he told his mother and showed her the rainbow she was amazed and apologized for being so rude to him. His mother said, "Jack why in the world did you buy a rainbow sprout, and not a healthy cow or a horse or something?" "I don't know," Jack said questionably. "Well it's cool that we have a rainbow, but what's the point of it?" his mother replied. Jack looked down at his fingers and quietly murmured, "Uh, um, I don't know." That night Jack was in his room again. His mother sent him to bed early. His mother was furious. She was even angrier once she realized that she couldn't even walk out of the front door because the rainbow was blocking their path. That night after he had made sure that his mother was asleep, Jack opened the window and crawled out onto the rainbow. Jack felt like he was floating on air. It felt so good! Jack was a curious boy and decided to climb the rainbow to see if it had an end. After about an hour he saw a little hut and a woman. As he got closer, she looked like a elf. Jack was never scared or worried, so he went and introduced himself. The woman just yelled, "Shoo, shoo little fella. Hide quick!" Right after the woman said that Jack heard a piter pater coming from the hall. Again the elf woman said "HIDE quick!" As he looked closer he saw that the woman was a Leprechaun. Again the Leprechaun woman said, "HIDE!" So he leaped into a pot, faster than you could say "Leprechaun!" Jack felt cool objects on his feet. He looked down and saw that he was in a Pot of Gold! The male Leprechaun yelled "Fi Fai Foe Fum, I smell the blood of a Irish man!" This little, three inch tall Leprechaun had a appetite of his own. Once he had eaten a pony for breakfast, a bunny for lunch and 3 penguins for dinner. As you can see he ate everything. You're probably wondering, "Why was he so little?" He was so small because after he ate, the meal comes right out into his very own port-a-pottie that he got for his fourteenth birthday.
The woman, trying to protect little Jack, said, "Honey, I only smell your dinner of four cheese, peperoni, salami, mushroom, chicken, tuna, jalapeno, onion, pineapple and bacon pie." That distracted the Leprechaun. Pie was his favorite food in the whole world. He ate it in about three bites. Then said again, "Fi Fai Foe Fum, I smell the blood of a Irish man!" Meanwhile, Jack had snuck away with the Pot of Gold, while no one noticed. The lady Leprechaun said, "I think it is time to go to beddy-bye. Okay? Get your PJs on and go to sleep." "Oh come on." said Mr. Leprechaun sadly. "It's not late yet." "Fine," said Mrs. Leprechaun. "You can watch one episode of The Luck Of The Irish. I think there is a new one coming out tonight." Mrs. Leprechaun looked at her watch and said, "Five minutes until it's on." Jack was on his way home. He could see his house in the distance. Then the Leprechaun said sadly, "I really want the blood of an Irish man." "The clocks ticking," Mrs. Leprechaun said in a taunting voice. "Fine, I'll watch The Luck Of The Irish." The Leprechaun whined and went down the hallway. "You can come out now," Mrs. Leprechaun whispered to Jack. She hadn't noticed that Jack had already snuck home. Jack and his mother were oohing and aahing at the pot of gold from Jacks visit to the rainbow. His mother was very satisfied. They went straight to the market and got two cows, a horse, eighteen chickens, a herd of sheep and a sheep dog. In ony one day they had used all of the gold. Jack's mother sent him to the rainbow again. Jack ran. He got to the end of the rainbow in a jiffy. As he got closer to the hut, he saw Mrs. Leprechaun. She saw Jack. Jack didn't care so he just kept running. When he got to the hut the
lady Leprechaun said, "Hey! You're the one who stole my husband's Pot of Gold yesterday! Scram little boy! Run! Just go away!" Right after the Leprechaun Lady yelled to Jack, they heard a piter pater coming from the hall. "Fi Fai Foe Fum, I smell the blood of a Irish man!" the male Leprechaun roared. "Same here." The lady Leprechaun said as she cast a hasty glance at Jack. "Oh, what do we have here?" Mrs. Leprechaun said in a taunting voice. "Looks like a Irish man to me!" Mr. Leprechaun exclaimed happily in an Irish accent. "That would go well with your rabbit roast." Mrs. Leprechaun said. "Oh, yes indeed!" Mr. Leprechaun cackled. "First we have to catch him," the lady Leprechaun smirked. The Leprechauns chased Jack for hours until they cornered him. They locked him in a room so he couldn't get away before their scrumptious dinner feast. Jack was lucky, he had a bobby pin in his pocket, and started to pick the lock. He picked it very quickly and snuck out. He tip toed right out of the room. When he was walking out the door, he remembered what he went there for. He looked both ways and walked as quietly as a mouse to the gold room. EVERYTHING was gold: walls, cabinets, food, clothes and much more! Jack choose a gold chest. In the chest were little, miniature gold objects. The chest was shaped like a four leaf clover. He rushed home in excitement. Jack could not wait to tell his mother. When Jack got home, he and his mother went to the market and bought a huge amount of vegetables, fruit and other things to eat. After only a few days, they ran out of the little gold objects to sell at the market. Jack's mother told him to go back to the end of the rainbow and get more gold. By now Jack and his mother were one of the richest families in Ireland. Jack pleaded not to go. His mother depended on him. Jack took off early the next morning. This time he had a plan. His plan was to go around the Leprechauns Port-a-Pottie which was outside and lead straight to the kitchen. Jack couldn't think of anything else. When he got to the kitchen he saw a lifetime supply of Haggis. (In Ireland they savor a meaty disgusting dish
called Haggis.) Haggis was his family's favorite food. They looked for it everywhere in the town when they had all that gold, but couldn't find it anywhere. Even better, right next to the Haggis Jack saw a huge dish of Corned Beef and Cabbage. Corned Beef and Cabbage was a special Irish treat. Everybody loved it. He decided to bring both delicacies home. Jack was almost out of the hatch when he heard from the Port-a-Pottie, "Fi Fai Foe Fom I smell the blood of a Irish man!" Jack knew it was the Leprechaun. Jack made a run for it. He went straight to the front door. Unfortunately he was very unlucky today. Mrs. Leprechaun was hosting her book club. Today in her book club they were discussing of names for the club. Jack hid under the couch and watched for at least twenty-five minutes. Finally they decided to named it The Women's Group For Nocturnal Purple Kangaroos Bow Ties With Cotton Candy Apples At The End Of The Colorful Rainbow. "Whew! That took forever!" Jack muttered to himself. After endless waiting, he decided to just sneak out the door. Right as Jack was going out the door, the oldest one in the book club saw him, and said in an Irish accent, "Is that you uncle Ralphie?" The oldest one was 121 years old and she liked to imagine things. She was deaf and blind so she wasn't able to stay realistic. (Uncle Ralphie was famous at the end of the rainbow. He was the one who died of eating Irish White Pudding Sausage. When he died, he was full of 457 pounds of Irish White Pudding Sausage.) Now everyone was staring at Jack, even Mrs. Leprechaun. She was furious and charged him. As the leader she told everyone to follow her. They all attacked Jack at once. Then Mr. Leprechaun came. He was mad! Haggis and Corned Beef and Cabbage were his favorite foods. This time Mr. Leprechaun locked Jack in the Port-a-Pottie. Jack was in there for awhile, when he accidentally knocked the Port-a-Pottie over. Lucky Jack, there was a air vent. The air vent was a hole at the top of the Leprechauns Port-a-Pottie. Jack decided he would sneak out of it. His plan worked. Jack ran home and gave his mother the Haggis and Corned Beef and Cabbage. His mother loved it! They had a great feast and lived happily ever after, especially with their lifetime supply of Haggis and Corned Beef and Cabbage.
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