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FR EE

YO UR S

ADOPTION

nd

How it took 7 years to adopt an Ethiopian baby boy

Birthday EDITION

Daycare models

Win!

What will work for you?

DO YOU DESERVE A MUMMY MAKEOVER?

Meet our Calendar Kids of 2013 Calendars for Sale only $10

THE

DAD

FACTOR

Raising Boys VS Girls HOW DIFFERENT IS IT?

Time to celebrate?

2012 PARTY PLANNER INSIDE! PREGNANCY

BABY

TODDLER

1 P R I M A R Y S C H O Spring O L 2012 CairnsSParenting P R I NCompanion G 2 012


Passionate about working with your child Now RecRuitiNg Family DaycaRe PRoviDeRs!

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


We build strong people, strong families, strong communities. AT YMCA MARLIN COAST RECREATION CENTRE: FITNESS

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Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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The Benevolent Society’s

Cairns Early Years Centre

The Cairns Early Years Centre offers free services for all families with young children pre-birth to 8 years old living in South Cairns. Some activities we are running are:

We run playgroups in the following areas...

Drop-in Child Health Clinics Play & Grow playgroups—at the centre and at a number of parks. Infant Massage Singing and Rhyming Parenting Programs Play ideas and information for parents

Woree

White Rock Bentley Park Edmonton

Kindergarten (at a very reasonable cost) Connect to Kindergarten programs Toys and reading activities to loan and practice at home

Please contact or drop into our centre for more info or support

CALL 07 4045 0003 Cairns Early Years Centre

Northern end of Bentley Park College Just off Borrowdale Close via McLaughlin Road Bentley Park Qld 4868

e ceyc@bensoc.org.au t 07 4045 0003 www.earlyyearscentre.org.au 4

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Gordonvale

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Mee t Jani sa Sate rra of Cair ns, our cover chil d for the 201 3 Cale ndar Kids on sale from 1st Octobe r

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editors’ note Happy Birthday to us! Wow, it’s been two years since we started the magazine and entered this crazy world of publishing. A big thank you to everyone who has helped us get here (you know who you are)! Check out the 2012 Party Planner - back this year with even more ideas for planning your next celebration. We all fell in love with our front cover babe. Isn’t he gorgeous? Meet his wonderful new adopted family and some of the in’s and out’s on adopting in Australia. If you are considering day care for your child, we have a round-up on all the options available; plus exactly how different is it raising boys vs girls? There are cheeky recipes to smuggle vegies into your child’s diet, crazy hair photo’s from our readers and a very honest confession about a tiresome, mother-in-law! From October 1 our 2013 Calendar, featuring some of our gorgeous FNQ Kids, will be on sale for only $10! Proceeds will benefit the paediatric playground at the Cairns Base Hospital. Get in early before they all go! ... Happy Parenting!

Juanita and Bec contact us SALES:

Juanita Soper

EDITORIAL: Rebecca Waqanikalou ADMIN:

Laura Franks

DESIGN:

Sheryn Bewert

Spring 2 012

this issue pregnancy antenatal classes & courses off your back!

the dad factor

12 16

29 30

daycare models

33 36

primary school raising boys vs girls get back to bed!

ethics growing a community

56 60 64

74

regular features inbox directory top 5 finds teacher feature dear dave mum behaving badly confession box

vegie smugglers

adoption

20

8 18 39 50 55 62 76 78 81 82

competitions little lifesavers baby brag board

59 67 70

why sex is important

getting more from your marketing $

man about the house

health everybody dance now

69

school holidays

48 52

parents life changer

investing in a super idea

birth story

toddler got a sucker?

39

finance

baby introducing baby to sibling

201 2 Pullou t Par ty Planne r

2013 calendar kids mummy makeover community photoboard

11 19 24 35 32

the ups and downs of adoption. We meet 2 local families who share their stories plus get the legal and psychological aspects to consider from the experts.

spring cover

www.engineroom.com.au

the Lloyds-Collins Family had a fantastic

PHONE: 0438 811 027 (Juanita)

day at Kewarra Beach with Dominic from

EMAIL: info@parentingcompanion.com.au

Pine Creek Pictures, inspired by our

ADDRESS: PO Box 4620 Cairns QLD 4870

Summer 2011 edition front cover.

www.parentingcompanion.com.au

Pine Creek Pictures • Ph: 0419 028 077

www.facebook.com/cairnsparentingcompanion

www.pinecreekpictures.com.au

DISCLAIMER: No part of this magazine, including advertisements within it, may be reproduced, in part or in whole without the expressed permission of the editor. Whilst the greatest care is taken to ensure that the information in the magazine is correct at time of publishing, readers are advised to check details before visiting. Cairns Parenting Companion cannot accept responsibilities for errors, inaccuracies or omissions. The expressions expressed within the magazine are not necessarily the views of the Cairns ParentingSpring Companion, of the Parenting individual writers. 2012but Cairns Companion 5


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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


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inbox

We value your feedback. Please email your comments to feedback@parentingcompanion.com.au

Editor’s Pick

KIRSTY LEA PHOTOGRAPHY Having studied photography in Brisbane at University, Kirsty established a photography business here in Cairns where she moved here with her family 4 years ago. Currently she has a studio in Cairns where she specialises in Newborn and Maternity photography and also enjoys getting outdoors to photograph older babies, maternity & couples. Her husband also photographs weddings with her during the year from Port Douglas to Mission Beach and the Tablelands, which truly makes this a family business!

own reaction to the situation as well

Cairns Parenting Companion Facebook liker, Tammy, posted a question on our wall after a recent incident where her elderly grandmother was kicked by a rowdy little diner while they were out for lunch. “Do you think kids should NOT betaken certain places?” Here is what you said ...

considerately. Mahliha R - I don’t judge in those situations at all! The mother could have been taking a call that she absolutely couldn’t take at another time at all! The child could have had behavioural issues. That doesn’t mean she should avoid

Fiona F - hmmm ... its a hard one. She (the mother) should have really stepped up earlier and controlled her child. On the other hand maybe she was just having

public places. Never judge those families! One day your child will play up at the worst possible time and you’ll hate that others are judging you.

one of those days and really was at her

Nancy V - We don’t all have well behaved

wits end and needed to just ignore him

kids, maybe he has problems and mum

for the time being. I don’t know. It’s not

is at her wits end. Always two sides to

appropriate to let that sort of behaviour

every story.

go on for so long. Hopefully the mothers day improved and she will be able to

Brenda T - We usually view the child

handle the situation better next time.

as a little terror, but I think it’s just bad

Phone: 0422 115 587

Dianne W - So it’s not really about

info@kirstyleaphotography.com.au

kids in certain places is it? It’s about

www.facebook.com/kirstyleaphotography

how to deal with a parent who isn’t

“Don’t worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you.” Robert Fulghumts.

as the mums job to manage her child

parenting! When a child seeks attention in a negative way, for them it’s better than no attention at all.

managing their child considerately? It’s

Carmel - I totally agree with Brenda.

a wide and wonderful world. Morons

Maybe you should be asking the

and inconsiderate people will exist. It’s

question - Do you think there are some

your job to learn how to control your

places some parents shouldn’t go?!!

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


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s r e v a s li f e lit tle

Local parents share their favourite tips for making life just that little bit easier.

Top Tip

Big Kid Bed

Congratulations to the Treacy and Komsic Families for each winning half day tennis programmes with Lifetime Tennis!

Present Planning At the start of each financial year (just after the tax return comes in) I sit down and plan the next 12 months of Birthday presents for our close family and friends. I then take advantage of any upcoming sales and buy a gift valued at roughly $15$20 per member, plus bulk $1 cards and wrapping and have this all stored at home for when the birthdays roll around. Saves money, time and the stress of last minute birthday buying. Jules – Freshwater

Cradle Cap I hear new mums regularly talking about cradle cap and how to get rid of it, I thought I would share my advice on this: only use natural products if possible, things like olive oil, coconut oil or other pure oils. Try to steer clear of anything artificial or with fragrances as babies skin will soak all these nasties up and sometimes these can be really harsh on their bodies. Gran – Mossman

Moving your little one to a ‘big bed’ can be an exciting time for them and you… but the thought of forking out $$ on a bed rail can be painful. Why not try a pool noodle! You simply put it on top of the mattress but underneath the fitted sheet on the open side of the bed and it’s enough of a barrier that they should not fall out. Tara - Cairns

Just In Case I had to share - I love my little kit for emergencies, it’s saved me more times than I can remember. In the boot of my car I have my ‘Just in Case’ kit, I bought a medium plastic container with a lid from Overflow and have packed it with, 2 sets of clothes per child, 4 nappies and wipes, 2 towels, sunscreen, mozzie spray, a couple bottles of water, mini first aid kit, Picnic Blanket and a tennis ball. This is great for whenever we are out and there is an unexpected change in plans, or we have wee/poo accidents, get wet at the beach or any of those kinds of moments. It just lives in my car and as I use something out of it, it gets replaced. Highly recommend every mumma has one of these! Sophie - Cairns

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Real ‘Lifesaver’ Not so much a tip, but definitely a ‘lifesaver’ – make sure you tie curtain and blind cords up high when you have little ones in the house, recently a close friend found her 13-month-old with the cord from the blinds around her neck. It happened so quickly and isn’t one of the usual ‘baby proofing’ things most of us think about. Sara – Edmonton

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P reg na nc y

classes & courses Having a baby is one of the most exciting and ‘unknown’ times in one’s life. There is a plethora of information and support available to expectant parents but in many cases, you just don’t know where to start. Here are a number of local classes and courses that can help with your preparation physically and mentally: Active Birth Workshop

Choices for Childbirth

Pregnancy Aqua Fitness

This workshop for pregnant women and their support person teaches how to create a safe, nurturing environment and how to provide positive and sensitive encouragement. Learn natural pain relief massage techniques, and relaxation and breathing techniques.

Choices for Childbirth believes an informed birth is essential to a woman’s experience. A positive birth experience has a direct impact on women’s enjoyment and confidence in early parenting and can markedly reduce post birth challenges. Choices for Childbirth provides women with a tool box of information and access to local support networks. Choices for Childbirth run a 1-day Labour and Birth short course. For dates and costs contact Lynda on 0439 220 041 or visit www.choicesforchildbirth.org.au

Pregnancy Aqua Fitness classes are a wonderful, fun and social class that will improve your fitness level and help prepare you physically for Birth.

The workshop also focuses on active labour and birth positions, as well as releasing fear and creating positive confident expectations. For more info call Gwyneth on 4051 1167 or visit www.cairnsbodyandbreathyoga.com.au

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Natural buoyancy in the water helps improve circulation, increases heart rate and massages muscles and joints without over heating. Suitable for all pregnant women to start anytime. For more information call Gwyneth on 4051 1167 or visit www.cairnsbodyandbreathyoga.com.au


Mindful Mamma Express Antenatal Class The one-day classes teach an understanding of the psychology of birth and how fear and anxiety can inhibit the natural birthing process. Mums are taught practical relaxation techniques for accelerated relaxation. Relaxation can reduce the time you are in labour, reduce the need for pain relief and create a more gentle birth for your baby. The course also increases the mother’s confidence in their birthing body and the birthing partners confidence and knowledge also. For further information on classes call Zoe Strickland on 0420 504 421 or visit www.zoestricklandmassage.com.au

HypnoBirthing® HypnoBirthing® is all about returning birth to the gentle, calm and joyful experience. Classes combine childbirth education with self-hypnosis and show couples how to safely prepare for a more natural and more comfortable birth of their baby. Classes combine the best of science and nature, and draw on the work of many inspirational and renown birth workers the world over. For upcoming dates and costs contact one of the Hypnobirthing practitioners: Zoe Strickland Ph: 0420504421 www.zoestricklandmassage.com.au Gwyneth Rowland Ph: 4051 1167 www.cairnsbodyandbreathyoga.com.au

Cairns Base Hospital – Childbirth Education The Integrated Women’s Health Unit provides programs for all pregnant women and their partners/support people, who plan to give birth at Cairns Base Hospital. The programs consist of six, 2 hour classes held at the Hospital, or at Community Health Centres. Young Parents’ Childbirth Education classes at Cairns Base Hospital are scheduled at regular intervals, for more information contact the Antenatal Clinic. Indigenous Women’s Classes are held on the fourth Tuesday of the month at Cairns Base Hospital from 10:30am to 2:00pm. Early registration is advised, as class numbers are restricted. For bookings contact Antenatal Clinic 4226 8760

Mums To be Meditation Meditation during pregnancy can help to get both body and mind into a deep state of relaxation. Meditation can also reduce the need for medical interventions during labour. Group classes and one-on-one sessions are available. For information or bookings contact Michelle on 0424 719 888 or visit www. michelleshealingandmeditationhaven.weebly.com

One-on-One Doula Doula’s provide individualised, unbiased prenatal education tailored to the family. The usual topics in childbirth education are covered, including nutrition, what to expect in pregnancy and birth, variations to birth and active labour. They also cover more specific issues such as writing an effective birth plan; the importance of informed choice; how partners can help and much more. Visit www.fnqbirth.com to find your local Doula.

Pregnancy Yoga Yoga offers an opportunity to help manage the changes in pregnancy and prepare for the birth of your baby. Each class includes twenty minutes of deepguided relaxation. Suitable from 12 weeks and no previous yoga experience required. For more information call Gwyneth on 4051 1167 or visit www.cairnsbodyandbreathyoga.com.au

The Pink Kit If you are looking for a self-education style of ‘antenatal class’ this is for you. The Pink Kit gives you the exact skills you need to work with your baby’s efforts to be born in ALL births. The Pink Kit is an instructional multimedia resource that allows you to pick and choose which skills to learn and tie them to your unique situation. To find out more visit the website www.thepinkkit.com

WIN!!! FIVE COPIES TO GIVEAWAY For your chance to win a copy of ‘The Pink Kit’, with BIRTH SKILLS for the pregnant woman and father-to-be email us your details to win@parentingcompanion.com. au or visit our website www.parentingcompanion.com.au Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


Bi r t h a f te r a Cae sa rea n SUPPORT GROUP

(BAC) WORDS Lynda Hay – Maternity Coalition

Once a caesarean always a caesarean, right? Wrong! For many women whose births have

births like fear, anger

ended in caesarean, future birth/s can

and guilt amongst

be a topic of uncertainty and fear. Many

others, which are all

women feel unsure and unaware of their

very normal and okay.

options around their next birth and this is why the Birth after Caesarean Support group has been formed. If you are planning a repeat elective caesarean or a vaginal birth after

But it is also important to work through some of these feelings before the birth of your next child. By becoming informed during

caesarean this support group is for you.

pregnancy, these feelings can then

The aim is to help women have a safe and

become ones of feeling in control,

positive birth by having an empowering

feeling safe and nurtured, feeling better

experience no matter the way their baby

equipped to make decisions for yourself

is born.

and your baby and feeling central to the

Meeting on a monthly basis to cover

experience. All of the above setting you

topics relating to a woman’s options

up for a positive experience, which

around repeat caesarean and vaginal

also has a direct impact on a woman’s

birth, risks and benefits of each option,

confidence and enjoyment in early

informed consent and refusal, navigating system policy, emotional support and the opportunity to hear from other mothers

parenting and can also reduce post birth challenges.

who have been through the experience

For more information including

of repeat caesarean or vaginal birth after

dates and times, contact the the

caesarean (VBAC). For many women there

Facebook page www.facebook.

can be unresolved feelings from past

coom/MaternityCoalitionNQ

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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WORDS Helen Sweeney – Midwife, Apple Tree Medical

Off your BacK! The best positions for birthing your baby and why lying on your back isn’t one of them!

Somewhere along the passage of time, it has become ‘normal’ for labouring women to lie down on a bed and give birth on their back. For anyone not having laboured before, you might think that lying on your back would be the most comfortable; after all isn’t that how you see women giving birth on TV? The short answer is NO, ask any woman in labour because lying on your back is NOT comfortable. GET OFF THE BED!

Why is lying on your back so bad? • Contractions are more painful and not as effective, • Labour can be longer, • It narrows the diameters of the pelvis making it more difficult for the baby to descend, • It increases your chance of having a Caesarean section, vacuum or forceps delivery, • the incidence of abnormal fetal heart rates increases, • It reduces oxygen to the baby as there is higher acidity in the cord blood.

Best positions to adopt for labour • Leaning on a work surface, the back of a chair, wall, bed (make sure it’s adjusted to your height) or your partner (it’s best to have your arms around his neck), • Rocking and swaying your pelvis whilst standing or leaning, • Kneeling on a large cushion, bean bag or pillow on the floor and leaning forwards on the seat of a chair, • Sitting astride a birthing ball, chair or the toilet, leaning forwards into the back of the chair or the toilet cistern (put a pillow in front of your ‘bump’ for comfort), • Squatting on a mattress or the bed, on ‘all fours’. What are the advantages? • Helps the baby’s head to descend in the pelvis as you are working with gravity, • Opens up the pelvis, increasing pelvic diameters by up to 30 percent, • Enables your birthing partner to massage your lower back and/or apply heat packs (really helpful!) • Contractions are more efficient and easier to cope with.

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


Best positions to adopt when pushing Leaning, Squatting, Standing, Kneeling, On ‘all fours‘.

What are the advantages? • All these positions are working with gravity • Shorter pushing stage • Opens up the pelvis, moving the coccyx away from the baby, lessening the likelihood of coccyx damage and making an easier passage for the baby • Reduces the risk of a Caesarean section, vacuum or forceps delivery

Change your position Upright positions will benefit you by making the contractions and the pushing stage more efficient. You should aim to change

www.worldoflearning.com.au

positions may times during labour and whilst pushing. You may need your midwife or birthing partner to help you with this. One of their jobs is to keep you mobile and help you get comfortable, using the furniture and birthing accessories in your room. When you are in strong labour and, particularly in transition, you will probably find that you don’t want to move around a great deal. That’s okay, but keep upright and keep rocking and swaying that pelvis. If you get really tired and the bed looks extremely appealing, lie on your left side with your ‘bump’ and legs supported by pillows and sponge wedges.

Positions for a posterior labour A posterior position is where your baby has it’s head engaged in the pelvis, but it’s spine is against your spine. About ten percent of babies start labour in this ‘back to back’ or posterior position. In this instance your labour can be quite long as the baby has to turn itself in the pelvis to get into a better position. Backache is extremely common and it can be hard to cope with unless you get the weight of the baby off your spine. The best position for this labour is going on ‘all fours’, it’s also a great position for lower back massages and heat packs.

What can you do with an epidural Women who choose to have an epidural will have their mobility compromised, which in turn will restrict the choice of birth positions. Enquire into the availability of a ‘walking epidural’. Whist you won’t be able to run around, it does allow more mobility than a traditional epidural. The best position to push when you have a traditional epidural is lying on you left side. Currently the USA are trialling a new birthing aid, the ‘peanut ball’. This peanut-shaped exercise ball fits comfortably between the woman’s legs, opening up the pelvis. Results have shown it significantly decreases the time in labour and the pushing stage and it lowers Caesarean section rates. Let’s hope the peanut ball becomes an option here in the not too distant future. So ladies, my message to you is ...

YOU DON’T HAVE TO TAKE HAVING YOUR BABY LYING DOWN, GET OFF YOUR BACK ! Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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Birth Story

WORDS Carissa Lyngcoln

H.E.L.L.P. SYNDROME

How things went terribly Wrong! I really enjoyed being pregnant. Yes, I’m one of those annoying women who breezed through pregnancy with no morning sickness and worked right up to a few days before my due date. However I did find the last few weeks were a struggle as it was summer and I was enormous carrying our ‘Lil Mountain’. ‘Lil Mountain’ seemed to be very comfortable where it was, as my due date came and went. Four days had passed and due to two consecutive elevated blood pressure readings it was decided I should be induced. Thursday morning was met with excitement and anticipation, we were finally going to meet ‘Lil Mountain’. But like most first time parents we had no idea what to expect. The gel was used to start the process and after hours passing with only mild contractions, the decision was made to break my waters and, boy, did that hurry things along. After hours of heavy labour, ‘Lil Mountain’ finally arrived at 12.03am Friday morning and she was a beautiful baby girl, Katelyn Violet. I was given medication to stabilise my blood pressure and once I was well enough I was moved back to our room to enjoy our little girl. Back in the room I was struggling but I just thought it was exhaustion after the birth. The next part is rather

PHOTO Shaina Bolton from DeShai Photography

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

sketchy for me but things went terribly wrong. I remember having my bed tilted backwards so they could get blood flowing to my head as my blood pressure was scarily low. I was surrounded by doctors and nurses trying to stabilise me, as my poor husband watched on whilst holding our baby girl. I remember thinking “please help, I have this beautiful family that I want to enjoy”. Things progressively got worse throughout the morning and I ended up in intensive care. I was hooked up to various machines and received a number of blood transfusions.

only been a few hours. It wasn’t until I saw my brother, who had flown in from Brisbane, that I understood that things had gone terribly wrong. I spent five days in ICU, before I was transferred back to maternity where the recovery continued. In total I spent just over two weeks in hospital where my husband was a pillar of strength and played a massive part in my recovery and in caring for our beautiful Katelyn. When we were finally able to escape hospital it was exciting but I was still carefully monitored as my body was still recovering.

I was diagnosed with HELLP Syndrome which is a life-threatening obstetric complication usually considered to be a variant or complication of pre-eclampsia. In my rare case HELLP Syndrome occurred after birth with no prior signs or symptoms. In ICU they informed me they would be putting me into an induced coma for surgery and further scans. I was oblivious to the severity of what was going on, my body was essentially shutting down on me. Meanwhile I was reassuring my husband and my parents that everything would be okay.

Katelyn is now five months old and I love motherhood, I can’t imagine life without this little gem.

When I finally woke and saw my husband the first thing I asked for was Katelyn. I had not yet realised I had been in a coma for three days, I thought it had


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20

n o i t P o Ad

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

PHOTO Pine Creek Pictures PICTURED Collins Family: (L-R) Jay, Karen, Alirra, Rob, Brie and Abdi


Adoption for many is not only about welcoming a new family member, it’s also about helping a child in need of a loving home. For the Colllins Family, it was an arduous 7 year journey to bring home little Abdi, whereas Cheryl Britton and her family were able to welcome Max in only 6 months when they adopted whilst living overseas. Aside from the legal processes families have to endure, there is also psychological factors that need to be considered.

It took 7 years to adopt our Ethiopian baby boy After seven years of being on the emotional rollercoaster of international adoption, we were finally adopting our beautiful Ethiopian baby boy. As a family of five, we were waiting to board a plane for Ethiopia in November 2011, when we received the phone call adoptive parent’s dread: we could not bring our baby boy home! The news was devastating to my husband, myself and our three excited children, who could not wait to meet their baby brother. My husband and I have travelled the world and have seen the extreme poverty in developing countries and the many children without a family. We felt every child deserved a secure loving family, which was why we decided to be assessed as an adoptive family. On the 22nd of October 2004, we lodged an expression of interest with the Queensland Government for the Ethiopian adoption program. We were advised the process could take about three years. After a rigorous assessment including an education workshop, writing a dossier of our lives, providing fingerprints, medicals, references from close friends and creating a life book for our adopted child among other things, our application was finally approved on the 14th of June 2006. Only eleven applications were allowed in Ethiopia at any one time, so we joined the queue. On the 29th of January 2009 our application was finally sent to Ethiopia to be matched with a child. Our application remained waiting in Ethiopia for another two years; it was updated twice during the waiting process to retain eligibility as potential adoptive parents. Further counsellor interviews, medicals, x-rays, fingerprinting and updated references were required. In 2009 and 2010, the Ethiopian

program was suspended for several months, initially by the Ethiopian government and then by the Australian government. Eventually it recommenced on the 6th of October 2010.

the phone call in transit that nearly broke us. Adoption officials advised that our new son’s health visa had been rejected. They asked whether we would like to reconsider our journey and the allocation of this child.

We felt our dream would never become a reality as the waiting continued and I would “age out” of the process in 2012. It was a requirement of the Ethiopian program for an age difference of no more

We were in a state of disbelief and shock, but felt it had to be an error, as all medical reports had been perfect. We decided to press on and deal with the issue in Ethiopia. The anguish on that night

than 40 years between the mother and the adopted child.

flight to Ethiopia was extreme. I recall that night as one of the hardest, trying not to sob my heart out in front of a plane full of strangers. We lodged an appeal in Ethiopia immediately and it took a week of difficult phone calls and emails, before the error was rectified and Abdi’s visa was approved.

Finally we received a phone call on the 29th of June 2011. Nearly seven years after we started the process, we had been allocated a 16-month-old baby boy, Abdi. We were told he was in good health and a fun-loving toddler. The news was a huge shock. We madly scrambled to prepare for a journey to Ethiopia to meet our baby boy. The photo’s that followed shortly after gave us an opportunity to share our ‘soon to be’ son with family and close friends … the bonding process had begun. Another delay followed, as the Ethiopian Court closed for the holidays. We were advised it would be at least six months before we could travel to meet our son. The wait during this process was agonizing. Still, there were passports to update, immunisations to be done, more legal documents to complete, and a baby shower was quickly organized to collect donations for orphanages so time passed quickly. On the 7th of September 2011, we were advised to be in Ethiopia on the 28th of October 2011 to attend court to finalise the adoption. On the 18th of October 2011, the five of us departed Cairns for Ethiopia to meet our new son and brother, Abdi. We expected to be away for at least six weeks, but this was uncertain. We then received

On the day we were to meet Abdi, we faced further delays. Our plane experienced mechanical problems and we had sudden requests to meet with adoption officials. It seemed at every corner we were being prevented from meeting Abdi. On the 27th of October 2011, the day before court, we finally had Abdi in our arms. It was an emotional meeting with all five of us calling his name and wanting to touch him. Abdi was a little overwhelmed, though, to my relief and joy, it didn’t take him long before he was sitting in our laps. It now feels Abdi has been with us forever. He is a beautiful, placid expressive little boy who has no hesitation in showing his excitement for the smallest things in life. He is a joy to be with and our love for him grows exponentially each passing day. We consider ourselves to be one of the luckiest families to have such a gorgeous boy to share our lives. Finally our family is complete. The International Adoption program for Ethiopia closed indefinitely on the 28th of June 2012. Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

21


PHOTO Kirsty Lea Photography PICTURED (Back L-R) Mike and Cheryl, (Front L-R) Myles and Max.

National Adoption Awareness Week 11th - 17th Nov

A wonderful chapter of our lives

NAAW is a collective of people who have come together to increase awareness of the adoption journey. We hope to shine a light on the global situation of children who are without a family and the families that long to provide a home and loving environment for a child. We want to inspire the international community to step up and ensure ethical, expedient practices that will serve families and abandoned children. We want to provide a forum for people who have travelled this journey. Adoption HAS BEEN shrouded in secrecy for many decades … it is time to TALK ABOUT ADOPTION. It is time to support the people who have travelled this path. It is time to get rid of the stigma and ignorance that surrounds this issue. We want to establish a healthy atmosphere of understanding for our young adoptees and adoptive parents. We hope to educate the greater community in understanding the issue and inspire politicians and policy makers, community leaders and everyone who values the lives of children to become passionate and pro-active in serving the kids who need us ‘grown ups’ to provide a solution for their circumstance. Deborra-Lee Furness Patron of NAAW www.adoptionawarenessweek.com.au

Ours is a usual, yet happy adoption

his environment, his family (he now had

story as we adopted our son whilst

three older sisters and an older brother),

living overseas. I am fully aware of how

his language, his food (no more congee

fortunate we are and I find it very terribly

… it was ‘hello vegemite sandwiches’) and

sad that something so genuine and

even his name. He took it all in his stride

beneficial for both child and perspective

and easily slipped into life in our big, hectic

parents is so difficult and near impossible

family.

in Australia. Our son, Max, is Hong Kong Chinese

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

after he joined us that I loved him already

and he joined our family when he was

and he felt the same way; it’s remarkable

17-months-old. At the time we were living

the way our hearts have this huge capacity

in Hong Kong due to work commitments,

to love. I’m adopted too and it gave me a

and we were fortunate enough to have

new perspective on what my birth mother

residency. The actual adoption process was

and my adopted parents must have

extremely thorough; it involved numerous

experienced. Now it’s Max and my “thing”.

interviews, workshops, medicals,

We talk about how we are both adopted

references, police checks, financial

and how we’re both pretty special because

checks etc, however, it only took six

we were wanted so much. Obviously it

months between initiating the adoption

isn’t something we could keep from him

process until we had Max (quicker than a

even if we wanted to; instead we have

pregnancy).

always talked about it in an open and frank

On the day we got to meet Max, it was

manner. I don’t remember being told I was

such a strange feeling walking up to the

adopted, I have always known and it has

foster family’s house with our case worker

never been an issue for me so hopefully he

and thinking, when that door opens

will feel the same way.

our child is going to be standing there.

Now we are back in Australia and I’m

Fortunately, as that door opened so did

glad it’s such a multi-cultural country.

another wonderful chapter in our lives.

Max is just like everyone else. When I look

We were greeted by the cutest, happiest,

at him I don’t see him as different, I just

funniest little boy. We spent the next week

see him as him (except his brown skin is

getting to know Max while he still had the

the envy of his older sisters). We have to

security of the loving family that had been

explain the situation sometimes as his

caring for him since he was a baby. When

brother is only a year older with blonde

it was time for him to come and live with

hair and blue eyes and people get a bit

us it was hard to take him away from them,

confused. But families now are seldom the

and although they said they wouldn’t

nuclear model of the past so we are just

foster again it wasn’t long before they

another variation. Our kids are great in so

were caring for another baby.

many ways and drive us crazy in others.

Max had the steepest of learning curves over the next few months. He changed

22

I remember saying to my husband days

Max is just the same, we’re just happy he is with us.


Adoption in Queensland WORDS Amanda Millyard Associate at WGC Law According to statistics contained in the annual Adoptions Australia report published by the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, the number of local adoptions in Queensland (that is, not inter-country adoptions) in 2009-2010 were ten. In the summary, it is noted that since the early 1970s there has been a 21-fold decrease in the number of adoptions in Australia. The report notes that in contrast, inter-country adoptions have increased since the 1970s and are the dominant category of adoptions. Couples seeking to adopt a child in Queensland must complete an Adoption Expression of Interest form and lodge this with the Department of Communities. Adoption Services Queensland (ASQ) will then determine their eligibility based on criteria set out in the Act. If ASQ determine the couple as eligible, then the couple’s names are entered on the ‘expression of interest’ register. From here, the couple waits to be selected for assessment from the expression of interest registrar, and will involve self-reporting, a variety of checks and home visits. If determined suitable, the couple will then be placed on the ‘suitable adoptive parent’s register’. The couple then wait for a child to be placed with them. This is the uncertain part of the process, as placement will depend on the number of children available for adoption, the needs of the child to be adopted and any preferences set by the birth parents for the adopting parents. The Adoption Act 2009 and the Adoption Regulation 2009 provide for the adoption of children in Queensland. ASQ, through the Department of Communities (Child Safety Services), is responsible for providing adoption services in Queensland in accordance with the requirements of the Act and Regulation. It is against the law to privately arrange an adoption in Queensland.

Adoption Mentality WORDS Keran Thomas – Social Worker Birdwing Therapies Adoption in Australia has changed over many years. The likelihood to adopt a baby or child within this country has altered due to the changes in social constructs and the norms within our society and it is now quite rare. For most prospective parents the idea of adopting an infant or young child comes about after years of unsuccessfully trying to fall pregnant. The psychosocial heart ache many go through can take a real toll on a person’s stress levels, sense of confidence and identity. The decision to adopt a child is by no means necessarily an easier option. There are a number of stressors that the process of adopting can bring. These include the process of establishing what country to apply with, cultural, distance and travel issues, the costs and the time frame in waiting for other countries government approvals. The prospective parents wider families also need to adjust to the decision to adopt as this will shape and alter (most likely for the better!), how they perceived their family to be. The adjustment and waiting processes should not be minimised intellectually, as they can all cause emotional turmoil during what is likely to be a long period of ups and downs during an adoption process. The most important thing to remember is your resolve for the decision and being open to support from family and friends, and seeking professional assistance if required for debriefing and strategies. Returning to Australia with your adopted child will be the new beginning of a large journey, for you, the child and your extended families. But, like all major times in our lives, we don’t have to do it alone.

The Department of Communities provide information sessions on a regular basis for couples interested in adopting.

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

23


Spring

s r e v a s e t a D

2013

www.parentingcompanion.com.au/CALENDAR

Happy 110th Birthday Peter Rabbit!

12-14 September

FUNDRAISING

Enjoy a mischievous musical about the world’s most loveable bunny, Peter

CALENDAR

Rabbit! It’s been 110 years since Beatrix Potter created him and the famous bunny and his friends will be live on stage at the Cairns Civic Theatre! Wednesday 12th September from 6pm and Thursday 13th & Friday 14th at 9.45am and 12 noon. To book phone 1300 855 835 or visit www.ticketlink.com.au

Dorothy the Dinosaur’s Beach Party

Saturday 22nd Sept

On sale from October 1st Help us to raise $35,00tr0ic!

Dorothy and her friends, Captain Feathersword, Wags the Dog, Fairy Clare and Henry the Octopus will be singing

dia event for the Pae CPC fundraising rns Base Hospit al ai C e th at d n u Playgro

your favourite Wiggly songs at Brothers World of Entertainment. Show starts at 9.30am. Tickets $24.50 (adult/child). Babies under 12 months free. Book today

FEATURES:

at Tickets Cairns, ph 4053 8333 or visit

www.brotherscairns.com.au

Sunday 21st Oct

• Our

Great Strides Walkathon - Cystic Fibrosis QLD

Janisa Saterra of Cairns Alyviah Yelland of Cairns Shaylee and Shameeka Mathews of Dimbulah Max Cooper Diehm of Cairns Bryson and Rynece Smith of Cairns Mia Potter of Cairns Isabella Grace of Cairns Rhyder James of Cairns Bailey Palmer and Errol Diefenbach of Cairns Amy Harvie of Cairns Riley Joy of Mossman Jaxon Clarke of Mareeba Taylah Harper of Port Douglas

Join Cystic Fibrosis Queensland & LJ Hooker Commercial Cairns in the Great Strides 2012 Walkathon, to raise funds to directly help CF families in QLD. You can participate in a 2.5km or 4.5km walk along The Esplanade starting at 8am. www.facebook.com/ LjHookerCommercialCairns

Melbourne Cup 2012

Tuesday 6th Nov

The Race that Stops a Nation, now in

Good luck if you’re placing a bet but most of all, enjoy this amazing day!

www.melbournecup.com

24

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Thanks to:

it’s 152nd year is our most celebrated horse racing event in the country.

Local Calendar Kids


Get into

Tennis

New stud e take adva nts can n 4 -week co tage of a urse for o nly

$69 includes a TENNIS RA FREE CQUET

Since the opening of the Cairns International Tennis Centre in September 2010 on the back of the Davis Cup, Lifetime Tennis has introduced hundreds of toddlers, kids and adults to the fantastic game of tennis. Boasting a professional coaching team, 12 international standard courts, four MLC Hot Shots mini-courts, Clubhouse, Pro Shop including professional restringing for tennis, squash and badminton racquets, Personal Trainer and Jade Plus Restaurant – FNQ is lucky to have this amazing facility. “Lifetime Tennis Cairns has an extensive coaching program and holiday program, and you don’t have to be a member to join these classes,” says Warwick Jones, Director of Coaching.

HERE’S WHAT AVAILABLE: Kinder Tennis is suitable for three to four-year-olds and is a great introduction to tennis for active toddlers, with a focus on active movement, hand-eye coordination and footwork. As an official MLC Hot Shots Tennis Provider, these classes are suitable for five to ten-year-olds. With smaller racquets, softer balls, smaller courts and games-based style coaching, students progress through the program in a fun, up-beat and encouraging environment. Total Tennis and Pro Tennis is suitable for students aged ten years to teens at the beginner, intermediate and high performance level. Students fine-tune their technical ability, learn tactics and push their tennis to the next level.

Local Photographers

Local Destinations

Local Information

Local Date Claimers

Local Phone Contacts

ONLY

10

$

ON SALE FROM: •

www.parentingcompanion.com.au

Good Start Early Learning Centres

Selected SUPA IGAs

Bendigo Bank Branches

Catholic Primary Schools

And for the Adults there are private lessons or evening group classes that are available for beginners, intermediate and advanced players. Weekly fixtures, cardio tennis, fun social nights, special tennis events and holiday program and corporate tennis days offer great variety at the Centre. Although you don’t have to be a Member to enjoy this great facility, now is a fantastic time to consider a Premium Membership which including some great discounts and benefits - join in the month of September (through to December) and for a single pay only $65 or for a family $132. Call 1300 30 15 30, visit www.lifetimetennis.com.au or find Lifetime Tennis Cairns on Facebook for more details.

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

25


ages b

etwee

2 - 13 years

n

High energy, fast paced, fun

children’s entertainment! Children’s Parties | Face Painting Cupcake Towers | School Disco’s | Dj | Karaoke | Cosmo The Clown | Balloon Sculpting

PHONE: 0439 535 518 www.crazybron.com.au

thday for bir ups t a e r G gro party

Open a t Stockla nd

Come and spend an action packed, fun filled day playing your favourite games! We are open seven days a week: 9am - 5.30pm Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday 9am - 9pm Thursday 9am - 5.30pm Saturday 10am - 4.30pm Sunday and public holidays. For more information and bookings:

0488 553 743

|email| game@leisureisland.com.au |website| www.leisureisland.com.au Stockland Shopping Centre 537 Mulgrave Rd, Earlville

!

ent Famil e y fromrtainm ent a s as $ l 2 ittle gamper e

Tokens with bet ter value fo r money . Visit our website for mor e info on token d eals. Find us on

Facebook

The Pier Shopping Centre The Marina, Cairns.

new My Dream Lights now in stock & full range of colour changing mobiles available - don’t miss out!

Layby for Christmas from 1st Sept 2012

20% of total purchase required to secure layby. All laybys must be paid in full by 23.12.2012

luminouslights.net.au

26

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


G et in the know!

Around town... PO B LO O M E X

PINK PONY PARADE

gh prevention. Inspiring wellness throu wellbeing expo This women’s health and 12th October at is being held on Friday m-9pm. Tickets the Shangri-La from 6p the door. With are $40 presale or $45 on presentations, some guest presenters, information exhibitors and loads of really look after and ways for women to bsite for more themselves. Visit the we dbloom.com info ww w.balancelifean

NEW Aboriginalurs Guided Walking To Teach the kids about our indigenous history with a new Djabugay Aboriginal guided walking tour that includes a trip on the majestic Skyrail. A fascinating insight into their traditions, language, stories and culture exploring natural rainforest trails on the traditional Djabugay people land. The 40 minute tours depart from Skyrail Barron Falls Station from 10.15am to 3.30pm. For more information phone 4038 5555 or visit www.skyrail.com.au

EMBER M E R O T K L A WA

Inspired by a young lady who wants to raise money for Breast Cancer Research after her Grandma was diagnosed with Cancer, Pink Pony Parade is like ‘Relay for Life’ but on horseback. Held on the 6 - 7 October 2012 at Kuranda Horse and Pony Club for more information or to be a part of this great event email: pinkponyday@hotmail.com or visit the website: www.ever ydayhero.com.au/ event/pinkponyparade

ARKETS REDLYNCH COMMUNITY M Redlynch Community Market (RCM) launched in August with great success. The markets are held on the fourth Sunday of every month from 8am to 1pm at Redlynch State College. Stalls include local art and craft, antiques and collectables, fresh local produce & packaged foods, fresh prepared foods, and ‘trash & treasure’. The key to the success of RCM is the collective creative talent from within the community. For more information contact Jodie Ferrero, Market Coordinator on 0428 668 113

ll be holding their This year SANDS wi th ber’ on Sunday 14 ‘A Walk to Remem ds. lan garworkd Park October 2012 at Su lost babies who have The walk honours irth h miscarriage, stillb their lives, throug r fo lk wa causes - ‘we or newborn death lk never take’. The wa the steps they will a d there will also be starts at 8. 30am an n be se - butterflies ca live butterfly relea d in te es er If you are int purchased for $15. on sa se contact Neris participating plea it on 4033 7919 or vis 4098 3089 or Kelly m ww w.sandsqld.co

THERAPY IN THE RAINFOREST Birdwing Therapies has recently relocated to its new purpose built studio amongst the trees at Redlynch. This beautiful setting is perfect for the professional counselling and therapy services offered for children, teens, adults and families. Keran has worked hard to ensure the space is relaxing and comfortable which in turn supports and encourages clients in their healing. The studio has easy parking and ramp access for children and adults of all abilities. Phone Mon-Fri: 4039 0004 or www.birdwingtherapies.com.au Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

27


Cortland (pictured)

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


In t roduc in g ba by to sibli n g s

Ou r M um m y Pa nelli st s sha re thei r ex pe ri ence .

PHOTO Kirsty Lea Photography PICTURED Summer and her big brother Cooper

Introducing a baby to its siblings can be an uncertain time for many parents. It is common for parents to be concerned as to how the current children will react and cope with a new addition so we asked our Mummy Panel for their advice.

Kate: While pregnant with ‘Little’, we tried to have ‘Big’ involved in the pregnancy as much as possible. She went to each appointment, watched each ultrasound unfold and listened to ‘Little’s’ heartbeat. When ‘Little’ was born, ‘Big’ was the first family member to meet her and was presented with a special gift that her little sister had ‘bought’.

sibling when they meet for the first time. Also try and make ‘special time’ with the

Liz: introducing ‘fur siblings’

Rachel:

early on. There is a lovely book called “Za

My kids loved reading the book “There’s a House inside my Mummy”. I would also suggest a special gift from the baby to the

resonated with my son and eased the

Before Dex was born we set up the nursery and let our dog and cat in to have a good look around so none of it was alien once the baby arrived. While I was in hospital my partner would bring home dirty nappies, blankets and baby clothes and leave them in the nursery, our bedroom and the lounge overnight, so that the baby smell was also familiar to the ‘boys’ when we came home. On the day we bought Dex home, my partner carried Dex into the house while I made a big fuss of the animals. We let them have a close-up sniff and lick of the new family member too (not to everyone’s taste but our dog is a licker!). We just tried to maintain the dogs routine as much as possible (meals and walks as often and at the usual time). I don’t know if any of it made a difference but they both accepted Dex straight away and we’ve

transition to a two-child home.

had no issues in the last year.

Sarah: We spent the length of my pregnancy talking to Xavier about becoming a big brother to two little sisters. He helped to decorate his bedroom and make it a ‘big boys’ room. When Willow and Maiah were born they gave Xavier a special gift for his new big boy room.

older siblings.

Michelle: Hmmm, I have no personal experience on this one but I have been told the following; Pander to the toddler’s ego and tell them their new and expensive present (think birthday or Christmas) was brought to them by the new baby on its arrival. By the time they figure out it was a distraction tactic they won’t be able to remember what it was like before.

Danielle: I was very unwell in my pregnancy and so explained to my eldest that I was pregnant Za’s Baby Brother” by Lucy Cousins that

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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the

Dad Factor The importance of Dad and Baby bonding. WORDS

Petra Lovey

Ideas about fatherhood have changed rapidly over recent decades. Not long ago the ideal of fatherhood was to be a breadwinner, to ‘bring home the bacon’, leaving mothers to take care of babies and young children. It is only recently that the father-infant bond has been investigated, but there is now evidence that father-baby bonding is significant in the child’s emotional, physical and cognitive development. In fact, the way a father interacts with his baby can shape the structure of the baby’s brain. From the moment babies are born they try to make a connection -an effort to communicate. Babies are not waiting to be taken care of, interested only in feeding and sleeping, or being entertained by brightly coloured rattles and nursery music. They are looking for relationships. In the first hours after birth a baby is primed to react to the mother’s and father’s voice he or she heard when in the womb. Studies have found that the way in which fathers behave with their children has a big effect on how the child’s social and mental skills develop, affecting the child’s learning and success later in life. When a bond is formed it affects the physical structure or the architecture of a baby’s brain, proving that bonding is more than just emotional. High quality bonding occurs when a relationship between a parent and baby gives the child a ‘secure base’ to explore the world, safe in the knowledge that the parent will be there when needed. Those with a high-quality bond can manage stressful situations more effectively. These children are more successful since they are better able to manage the normal difficulties of school, and they form friendships more easily. Most fathers have a special role in what we call rough-and-tumble play, which increases the social

30

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


Risk taking is an important factor in preparing our children for a complex and dangerous world. It is more typical of fathers to solve problems through action rather than through talking, preferring to use games, physical contact and humour to interact with children. The simple act of playing peek-a-boo can alter the pathways formed by the neurons in the brain of the growing infant.

a E O th nd ver P Al so nd e S eve y W EN ch ry ee op oo da ke en l H y d nd M on ol ur ida in da y2 ys g : 2n d O th ct ob er . .

skills of their children. Fathers also have a role in increasing physical activity and reducing the temptation to ‘bubble wrap’ our children.

er tob Oc

2 t2 Sa

n7 Su ill t er mb pte e S

The child’s emotional intelligence, to put effort into learning and the tenacity to keep going when things get tough is developed long before school. These personal factors are the result of both the genes that are passed down and the way that mothers and fathers do their parenting. Thankfully, we know now that the ability to be a father who cares for young children is hard-wired into our genetic make-up. Furthermore, the beneficial effects of fathering can be passed on to sons and grandsons, their sons and the sons of their sons. (Excerpt from ‘The Dad Factor’ by Dr. Richard Fletcher). Dr Richard Fletcher is a pioneer researcher in the area of men’s health and family issues. He leads the Fathers and Families Research program at the University of Newcastle. The Dad Factor is available from bookshops or from www.newcastle.edu.au/research-centre/fac/resources

3 Large Waterslides Fun Pool Kids interactive play system Licenced Kiosk/Bar Fun for all the family LOCATED 10KM SOUTH OF CAIRNS IN EDMONTON For prices, terms & conditions visit:

www.sugarworld.com.au

Tips to help dad bond with baby 1 Play peek-a-boo or pull funny faces: babies love to contemplate faces. 2 Take a bath together: babies love to be snuggled against their father’s chest. 3 Sing to your baby: singing lullabies to your baby can be a real bonding experience. 4 Read to your baby: it doesn’t matter what your read. Babies love to hear your voice. 5 Carry your baby around: either in a sling or cradled in your arms, babies are soothed by the rocking motion.

Dad’s Day-Out all welcome Celebrating the men raising our children

Free activities and refreshments 10am-3pm 3rd October 2012 Ravizza Park • Edmonton Brought to you by: Cairns Early Years Centre • Mission Australia • Cairns Regional Council • Centacare Cairns • Wuchoppern

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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Community

We build strong people, strong families, p h o t o bo ard strong communities. The long and the short of it! Cohdee at her Daycar e’s Crazy Hair Day!

WI N N ER

AT YMCA MARLIN COAST RECREATION CENTRE:

FITNESS P Yoga RU N N E R - U

Pilates PrYme Movers 50+ Fitness Challenge Boot Camp Box Fit Aerobic Pump Zumba and more!

SPORT

AQUASAFE

Net Set Go Netta Netball Juniors Netball Ladies Netball Mixed Gymnastics (recreational) Kinda Gym

Woree • Gordonvale • Babinda

CRECHE

Learn to Swim AQUATIC EDUCATION & LEARN TO SWIM

9am Monday - Friday

Aquasafe is YMCA’s unique aquatic education and learn to swim program for children from 6 months to adults. Enquire now to enrol your child. All abilities, all age groups. Phone YMCA

Send us your favourite Sporting pic and WIN thanks to Officeworks!

Gordonvale 4056 1353 • Woree 4054 6964 • Babinda 4067 1211 To enter visit our website for all the details and you could be in the running to win a $100 Voucher towards canvas prints with thanks to Marlin Coast Recreation Centre Officeworks Cairns. www.parentingcompanion.com.au

For all your printing, canvas, office and back to school needs.

1-15 Water St, Cairns • Ph: 4052 9400 YMCA www.officeworks.com.au Leisure Park Road, Smithfield p: 4057 7507 • e: cairns@ymca.org.au

www.cairns.ymca.org.au 32 Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


Are your child’s sucking habits something to worry about? There are all sorts of ‘sucking’ habits that

to chronic mouth-breathing, which

naturally develop in childhood, including

contributes to a long list of problems

sucking dummies, thumb sucking, finger

including increased risk of upper

sucking, lip sucking, teddy bear sucking,

and lower respiratory tract infection,

blanket sucking, and even toe sucking!

inflamed tonsils and adenoids, and

These are all examples of ‘non-nutritive’ sucking, which means these sucking habits do not provide nutrition for your child’s

worsening symptoms of asthma and allergies. • Swallowing problems. Non-nutritive

growing body. Of course, most parents

sucking can distort the structure of the

know this!

oral cavity and compromise the proper

However what many parents may not be aware of is how non-nutritive sucking can adversely affect their child’s jaw, teeth, nose and facial development, which can also cause breathing, swallowing, hearing and speech problems, particularly if nonnutritive sucking habits continue beyond four to five years of age. Let’s take a closer look at some of the effects of non-nutritive sucking: • Poor teeth and jaw development. Non-nutritive sucking can affect the alignment of the upper and lower jaw and cause crowded, crooked teeth, which may require expensive orthodontic work to correct. Also, orthodontic work may relapse if the underlying sucking habit is not addressed. • Abnormal nasal cavity development. Non-nutritive sucking can compromise the development of the nasal cavity, making it difficult for your child to breathe through the nose. This can lead

blog

development and movement of the tongue, making swallowing difficult, resulting in messy eating, drooling, air gulping and stomach aches and pains. • Speech and hearing problems. Non-nutritive sucking can lead to unbalanced muscle development of the mouth and face, making it difficult for some children to articulate certain sounds and form words properly; it can also lead to hearing problems. HOW TO DISCONTINUE DUMMY SUCKING • When choosing a start-date, take care there are no major upheavals in your child’s life eg. make sure your child is not unwell, or that your child is not starting play group, etc.

WORDS Tina Taylor - Certified Orofacial Myologist, LLB (Hons), BSc, AAOM.

for the dummy while keeping it simple and low-key. The idea is to locate the dummy within about 30 seconds ie. before your child starts making a big fuss or a big scene; • When you locate the dummy, do not give it to your child or place it in your child’s mouth; simply place it on the bed where your child can see it. Do not make any comments about finding the dummy; keep it simple and say a gentle goodnight. • Repeat the process each night over a couple of weeks or more, gradually increasing the search-time from 30 seconds to 40, 50, 60 seconds etc. By gently extending the search-times while quietly searching for the dummy, your child is more likely to fall asleep before the dummy is found – without frustration, or fanfare; and furthermore, you are seen as a helper and not a hindrance, as your child slowly adapts to being without his or her dummy. • If your child’s daytime dummy sucking patterns continue, you can adapt this method to those times and places your child uses the dummy most.

• When it is time for your child to go to bed, discreetly place the dummy in a location that is not visible to your child, but is close at hand for you to locate; • Put your child into bed and wait for your child to request the dummy;

For more information please contact Tina Taylor, Certified Orofacial Myologist, based in Palm Cove (Cairns). Phone Tina on 0488 040 242 or email tina@optimalbreathing.com.au

• Without making a fuss, begin looking

The team from the Bentley Park Early Years Centre shares some of their knowledge and expertise of those very important early years in a child’s life. www.parentingcompanion.com.au Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

33


Jackley’s Bakehouse proudly uses and recommends IcingBits

Custom Birthday Cakes Made to order!

Located in Raintrees Shopping Centre Locally Owned & Operated

phone 4053 3992 mobile 0438 864 633 find us on

34

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


mummy makeover winner

:Mel before her Makeover.

Our Mum

Mother of 3 Mel Parisi. “My husband works away so having more time to myself is nonexistent. Receiving a makeover would not only build my self esteem and confidence but would make me appreciate myself a lot more and put a smile on my face.�

WIN a Makeover For your chance to WIN a mummy makeover thanks to Reds Salon & Spa and Shaz Spannenburg Digital images visit our website www.parentingcompanion.com.au

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

35


36

s l e d o M e r a c d l i h C

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


Today, due to many women returning to the workforce to help pay the family bills, or by choice, child care has become a necessity. There is a greater choice of child care options available today then ever before, with Federal funding to assist with costs. Families have differing needs when leaving their children with someone else, but the common strand throughout is that their child be given quality of care, in a safe environment.

Family Day Care

It is also important to recognise that every child is an individual, who develops with individual wants and needs and there is no one ‘size’ fits all in child care.

group or service provider, and care hours can

Most parents can receive the Child Care Benefit to help cover the cost of child care, including long day care, family day care, occasional day care, outside school hour’s care, vacation care, pre-school, and kindergarten. It may also help cover the cost of child care provided by grandparents, relatives, friends or nannies. The amount of Child Care Benefit families can receive depends on the amount and type of care utilised, your family’s income, the number of children in care, or parents meeting the ‘work, training, study test’ or is exempted.

includes primary school children – where up to 4 children can receive care in a home. Carers also undergo training and must be accredited. Generally organised by a central be negotiated with the carer to suit. Montessori Child Care Montessori is an educational philosophy

Au Pairs provide a flexible and affordable childcare option and is growing in popularity. Au Pairs usually live with a family, provide childcare and assistance with light housework. They are usually on working holiday visas and most stay with families for an agreed period of time, ie. 6 months. You can find out more at www.hireanaupair.com run by Cairns Working Mum of 3, Natasha Brown.

based on the work of Maria Montessori that focuses on each child’s uniqueness and unfolding personalities. It is an accredited Kindergarten program and runs as a long day care for children from 15 months to 6 years of age. Occasional Care provides short term care for under school aged children. Cairns has one such centre in Water Street providing a short term service for families needing care for various reasons, particularly those out of town. Nannies

SO WHAT IS AVAILABLE FOR CHILDREN?

take on the role of carer in a home

Long day care for under six-year-olds, where parents can leave their children up to 10 hours in care at a centre, which has to undergo accreditation, and meet State Regulations. Staff educators are trained or undergoing training, and some centres offer the Qld Kindergarten Program with a trained teacher and educational program in preparation for Prep in schools.

(sometimes as a live-in nanny) and duties are varied and include domestic tasks as well as care. Wages negotiated, and currently the service is not accredited. Most nannies are not formally trained but generally have varied experience with children, hold a Blue Card and First Aid/CPR certificates and if hired through an agency will have public liability insurance covered.

Out of School Hours Care (OOSH) provides care for before and after school and holiday care – generally provided at schools. Educators and service must be accredited. Family Members/ Grandparents using family as child care is becoming more common. Many Grandparents are now taking on their grandchildren for regular care. It can be a good option and cost effective. Naomi Wilson – Sheridan Meadows and Spectrum Counselling and Personal Development owner. 30 years + experience in early childhood as a Director, Lecturer and Service Owner.

LATEST CHILDCARE VACANCIES Visit our Facebook page and website each month to see the latest childcare vacancies around the region. If you are a child care provider and have vacancies, please email us at info@parentingcompanion.com.au to be included.

BADMINTON || BASKETBALL || CIRCUS || STATE OF THE ART GYMNASIUM ZUMBA || CIRCUS SKILLS || ROBOTICS AND JUNIOR TAE KWON DO GYMNASTICS - RECREATION CLASSES LEVEL 1- 4 BOYS & GIRLS

McNAMARA STREET - MANUNDA - PH: 4053 1532 Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

37


Foster Carers

make a difference! Children and Young people need someone; who is kind, who is caring, who will listen, who is patient and will be forgiving, who never Give up, who will understand that life has been tough and at times neglectful.

Can you be someone? The difference you could make for a child is unbelievable.

Contact us If you are interested in making a positive difference in a child or young person’s life, please contact Will on 07 4032 8300.

www.lwb.org.au 38

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Our foster families and individuals go through a rigorous assessment and training process to ensure they are able to provide a suitable care environment. Each child and young person is then matched to an approved foster carer based on a range of criteria that aims to promote stability and long lasting relationships. All foster families receive ongoing support and training to maintain their capacity to care and assist them to meet the changing needs of each child or young person.


A

R

T

Party Planner

Y

2 01 2

P


Here’s some great hints, tips and ideas you can use to throw the BEST BIRTHDAY par ty EVER! With the right planning, and by breaking the day down into smaller, manageable components, you can give a professional party planner a run for their money. Check out some ideas for these themed birthday parties:

Outer Space Party CAKE FOOD & DRINKS

Alien cupcakes

d green cordial onrock meatballs an Star sandwiches, mo haped ice cube en cordial into a star-s gre ng uri po by rs sta ice party table ter space drinks at the tray. Freeze, add to ou

itations INVITATIONS Rocket inv ! boxes and lots of alfoil ads using cardboard COSTUMES Robot he th 2 silver plates ergalactic Frisbee wi Robot Pinata and Int GAMES emble flyer saucers taped together to res

Under the Sea CAKE

Fish cake

FOOD & DRINKS

Fish fingers, gold coins, octopus hot dogs a hot dogs cut with eight ‘tentacles’

INVITATIONS Send invitations in a bottle burn paper with edges to look old COSTUMES

Tattoos, eye patches and fake beards

GAMES

Go fish and crab races

Dinosaur Party CAKE

FOOD & DRINKS

Volcano cake wiches prints cheese sand Tyrannosaurus foot rgers s, brontosaurus bu cut out as footprint punch and swampwater

ur jigsaw invite INVITATIONS Dinosa ur tails and feet COSTUMES Dinosa s toy dinosaur bone A fossil hunt with GAMES

See more ‘themed party’ ideas in the new book, Party! The Ultimate Kids’ Birthday Party Book, published by Plum for Pan Macmillan Australia, RRP $24.99, available from September 18 2012.


Make planning any party a breeze with Party Packs, Invitations, Centre Pieces and Gift Ideas all uniquely hand crafted by

Ph: 0421 034 825 • www.alittlesomethingcairns.com

Princess Party CAKE

Fairy rainbow cake

FOOD & DRINKS

Butterfly and heart shaped sandwiches with lady lemonade made from fizzy guava juice or even lemonade with a touch of red food colouring

INVITATIONS Butterfly invites using cardboard and ribbons COSTUMES

Fairy wings for your guests

GAMES

Kiss the frog, musical thrones and a princess slippers treasure hunt

! H S A L P S a e v a H

The kid’s will

rties easy! Muddy’s makes pa d we’ll organise

s an Bring your balloon able, rty Platters avail the rest! Kids Pa d, ea br ry fai of ge offering a ran and hot food. sandwiches, fruit Email: muddyscafe@gmail.com

Phone: 4051 0388 174 ESPLANADE • CAIRNS

FUN

for adults & kids parties! for big or small celebrations

Jumping Castles• Mechanical Bull• Laser Tag • Sumo Suits• Slides • Juke Box Hire• Waterslides • Gladiator Game• Slush Machines for hire • Fireworks available upon request

CAKE FOOD & DRINKS

Sports Day Party

Sporty cupcakes - soccer ball, bask etball, tennis ba ll Popcorn, orange quarters, footy pi es an d rainbow energy drinks

INVITATIONS Gold medal invite usin g chocolate med als COSTUMES Gues ts wearing their weekend sport uniform or footy shirt GAMES Sack race, egg an d spoon race wi th mini podiums for presentations

Barrier Reef Amusements ph 40512424 • www.barrierreefjumpingcastles.com.au

Planning a Party?

From party themes, balloons, decorations to costumes, accessories and everything in between. We know how to throw a celebration and we’re here help you.

SHOWGROUND SHOPPING COMPLEX

We have your needs covered!

Ph: 4051 0486 • www.cairnspartysupplies.com.au


CAIRNS # 1 ENTERTAINER PRESCHOOL & KINDERGARTEN

With balloons, decorations, disposable tableware and helium hire, we have your party needs covered! We cater for children’s and adult’s themed parties.

506a Mulgrave Road (Opposite Stockland) p: 4054 6466 www.balloonsetc.com.au

The Pied Piper of children and it is easy to see, Why my inbox is flooded; many places to be, So e-mail, call or send me a text. Rest assured in knowing you have hired the best.

phone: (0437) 707-090 www.theamazingachacha.com.au

Kids Room Open Nightly Fully Supervised h State of the art kids room wit de arca , ent ipm large play equ games, x-boxes, games, toys.

Relax and enjoy a great night out! 24-32 Armstrong Street, Edmonton P: 4045 4757 www.fullersports.com.au We take the hassle out of Birthday Cakes!

Custom Birthday Cakes

Made to order!

Delight children of all ages with a specialty children’s birthday cake. We create personalised themed cakes, of all shapes and sizes to families in the cairns area. All celebrations, taste buds and budgets are catered for.

Take the hassle out of baking a cake! call today for quote 4053 3992 find us on

Kids Parties Cairns For fun, fuss-free parties delivered directly to your door. KPC offers over 30 themes... From Princesses and Pirates to Jumping Castles in the Jungle. Parties have never been this easy! kidspartiescairns@gmail.com Ph: 0437 114 294

Hosting a party has never been this easy! Do you need quality food delivered to your workplace, home or even the beach? Pasta • Roasts • Mobile Wood Fired Pizza! and Sandwiches for 50 to 150 guests.

0437 000 740

www.affordablecateringcairns.com.au

Kids Disco Parties every Sunday 3.30 - 6pm

Dancing, games, music, prizes, food & fun! For 3 to 12 year olds with crazy hosts & disco DJ's

Anderson St, Manunda • P: 4053 1053 • www.brotherscairns.com.au

We LOVE kids parties! We have a secure play area, Xboxes, movies and even a supervised jumping castle. Platters or tailored menus suit. Decorations at no extra cost.

Let us do the work for you!

P: 4055 1249

www.theredberet.com.au


Children’s birthday parties have never been easier!

t Prices star $19.50 from just . per child

All inclusive packages include set up, food, drinks, cake and access to Pelicans in Paradise adventure playground and pool.

Kewarra Beach • Ph: 4059 9924 www.paradisepalms.com.au

All parties set up behind your lanes. Free lollybags and game gift passes for all the kids. Can include a kids meal or our new kids platters. Available 7 days a week. FREE party invites from our website.

Pease St, MANOORA • p: 4053 3497 • www.gobowling.com.au

Party PackS to You Your party, your theme, your colour, delivered to your door. Disposable tableware, party supplies helium balloons and more!

Face Painting for Children & Adults, Events, Parties, Shopping Centres, Corporate, Functions

There are lots of options at very reasonable rates. The choice is yours.

tic Parties s a t N FU For

Mention this ad for FREE * Lolly bags!

No party to small or large.

0458 975 899

partypackstoyou@hotmail.com

Plenty enterta of inment

Great Food! & we clean up!

*one/party child. Offer valid for parties booked before 1 November 2012.

Specialists in tailor-made parties! Take the fuss out of your child’s next party with crazybron’s high energy entertainment. Offering face painting, balloon sculpting and loads of party games. Crazybron’s party fun will leave your children buzzing with excitement.

Ph: 0439 535 518 www.crazybron.com.au

We specialise in tailor-made birthday parties for absolutely any theme your child wishes - the options are only limited by their imagination! Fantastic range of packages for all age groups to ensure your child has the most awesome birthday ever!

Contact Sian: 4057 5412 • www.cheekymonkeyclub.com.au

Add an exciting dimension to your next Birthday Party with

SandArt. Glass deco, shrink art and other great crafts also available.

p: 0410 041 633 www.sumphunkidzcraft.net.au


spring

Directory TRADES AND SERVICES

Page

AS Accounting

254 Mulgrave Road • Westcourt

www.asaccountantscairns.com.au

4041 1015

69

Cairns Home Loans

140 Mulgrave Road • Cairns

www.cairnshomeloans.com.au

0400 636 953

75

Cairns Complete Clean

info@ cairnscompleteclean.com.au

www.cairnscompleteclean.com.au

0421 357 909

15

H&R Block Cairns

Suite 1, 140 Mulgrave Road • Cairns

www.h&rblock.com.au

13 23 25

80

KT Computer Solutions

Bentley Village Shopping Centre

www.ktcs.com.au

4045 4666

72

WGC Law

1A Water St • Cairns City

www.wgc.com.au

4046 1111

72

KIDS WELCOME

Page

Brother Leagues Club

99–105 Anderson St • Manunda

www.brotherscairns.com.au

4053 1053

Go Bowling

93 Pease St • Manoora

www. gobowling.com.au

4053 3497

Leisure Island

Stockland Cairns Shopping Centre

www.leisureisland.com.au

048 8553 743

26

Sugarworld

Hambledon Drive • Edmonton

www.sugarworld.com.au

4055 5477

31

KIDS DEVELOPMENT

65 9

Page

Aldon Tutoring

12-20 Toogood Rd • Woree

www.aldontutoring.com.au

0438 886 771

72

Awesome Cheerleading

info@ awesomecheerleading.com

www.awesomecheerleading.com

0402 225 630

80

Begin Bright

10/146 Anderson St • Manunda

www.beginbright.com.au

0407 536 587

63

Birdwing Therapies

PO Box 320 • Redlynch

www.birdwingtherapies.com.au

4039 0004

71

Cairns Early Years Centre

Northern End of Bentley Park College

www.earlyyearscentre.org.au

4045 0003

Cairns Libraries

Across FNQ

www.cairnslibrary.com.au

see the website

78

Cairns PCYC

91-97 MacNamara St • Manunda

www.cairnspcyc.org

4053 1532

37

Cheeky Monkey Club

sian@ cheekymonkeyclub.com.au

www.cheekymonkeyclub.com.au

4057 5412

14

Choi Kwang Do

1/21 Donaldson St • Manunda

www.ckdcairns.com.au

0414 782 189

68

C Me Swim

Edge Hill and Paradise Palms

www.cmeswim.com.au

4053 2549

9

Essential Skills

32 Fishburn St • Bentley Park

www.swimskills.com.au

4045 2782

6

FNQ Dance Academy

168 Draper St • Cairns

www.fnqdanceacademy.com.au

4051 4888

75

LifeTime Tennis

International Tennis Centre • Sheridan St

www.lifetimetennis.com.au

1300 301 530

77

Little Snappers

1 Cumberland Avenue • Smithfield

www.littlesnappers.com.au

4038 1241

7

YMCA Smithfield

Leisure Park Rd • Smithfield

www.cairns.ymca.org.au

4057 7507

3

CHILDCARE AND EDUCATION

4

Page

Cairns Montessori

9 Brose St • White Rock

www.cairnsmontessori.com.au

4036 1055

71

Candlenut Steiner

46 Boyles Road • Kuranda

www.candlenutsteinerschool.qld.edu.au

4093 8809

73

Catholic Education

Schools across FNQ

www.cns.catholic.edu.au

see website

10

Community Kids Child Care

Brinsmead • Freshwater • Gordonvale

www.communitykids.com.au

see website

79

www.familydaycarecairns.com.au

4032 1259

2

Family Day Care Cairns

108 Collins Avenue • Edge Hill

Just Kids

admin@ justkids.net.au

www.justkids.net.au

4051 9788

79

TAS

White Rock • Kewarra Beach

www.tas.qld.edu.au

4036 8111

8

World Of Learning Child Care

Bayview Heights • Bentley Park

www.worldoflearning.com.au

see website

17


When you buy from a small business, you are not helping a CEO buy a third vacation home. You are helping a little girl get dance lessons, a little boy get his team jersey, a mum put food on the table, a dad pay a mortgage, or a student pay for college. Our customers are our shareholders and they are the ones we strive to make happy. Thank you for supporting small businesses!

HEALTH SERVICES

Page

Abbott Medical Centre

Stockland Shopping Centre • Earville

4033 7666

66

Appletree Medical

Draper St • Smithfield • Palm Cove

www.appetreemedical.com.au

4038 2777

17

Axis Chiro

Suite 13,36 Grafton St • Cairns

axiscc@ bigpond.net.au

4041 7020

79

Cairns Audiology Group

Calanna Medical Centre • Woree

www.cairnsaudiologygroup.com.au

4054 5561

46

Cairns City Dental

69 McLeod St • Cairns

www.cairnscitydental.com.au

4051 2500

77

Cns Family & Cosmetic Dental

Stockland and Mt Sheridan Plaza

www.cosmetic-dentist-cairns.com.au

4054 4338

51

NQ Ortho

3 Scott Street • Cairns

www.nqortho.com.au

4051 2333

29

PREGNANCY, CHILDBIRTH AND POST NATAL

Page

Bella Forma

The Pier at the Marina • Pier Point Rd

www.bellaforma.com.au

4041 7308

31

Figgers

Smithfield Shopping Centre

www.figgers.com.au

4038 2144

78

Juniors

32 Main Street • Atherton

www.juniorsonline.com.au

4091 2732

23

Hire For Baby

cairns@ hireforbaby.com

www.hireforbaby.com

4032 1984

75

PARTY SERVICES

Page

Affordable Catering

info@ affordablecateringcairns.com.au

www.affordablecateringcairns.com.au

0437 000 740

53

Brother Leagues Club

99–105 Anderson St • Manunda

www.brotherscairns.com.au

4053 1053

65

Cheeky Monkey Club

sian@ cheekymonkeyclub.com.au

www.cheekymonkeyclub.com.au

4057 5412

14

Crazy Bron

crazybron@ bigpond.com

www.crazybron.com.au

0439 535 518

26

Gecko’s Indoor Play Centre

Northern carpark • Smithfield Centre

www.geckosplay.com.au

4038 1181

10

Muddy’s Cafe

174 The Esplanade • Cairns

www.muddyscafe.com

4051 0388

68

Paradise Palms

Paradise Palms Drive • Kewarra Beach

www.paradisepalms.com.au

4059 9919

75

The Amazing Achacha

info@theamazingachacha.com.au

www.theamazingachacha.com.au

0437 707 090

68

PHOTOGRAPHY AND KEEPSAKES

Page

Bumble Bees Photography

rpmneu12@ tpg.com.au

www.bumblebeephotography.com.au

0431 610 641

49

Heaven on Earth Photography

10 Seaview Close • Bayview Heights

www.heavenonearthphotos.com

0428 496 487

10

Shaz - Digital Images

Lot 32 The Rocks Rd • Redlynch

www.digitalimages.com.au

4039 0442

35

Twinkle Toes

30 Trundle Terrace • Whitfield

www.twinkletoes.com.au

4034 3131

19

FOR MUM

Page

Cairns Beauty Academy

97 Spence St • Cairns

www.beautyacademy.com.au

4051 3822

66

Jackley’s Bakehouse

Raintrees Shopping Centre

www.facebook.com/JackleysBakehouse

4053 3992

34

Life Without Barriers

Anderson Street • Manunda

www.lwb.org.au

4032 8300

38

Luminous Lights

The Pier at the Marina • Pier Point Rd

www.luminouslights.net.au

0409 324 685

26

Mungalli Creek Dairy

Found- local IGA, Foodworks & Coles

www.mungallicreekdairy.com.au

4097 2232

61

Rebel Sports

157 Mulgrave Road • Cairns

www.rebelsport.com.au

4041 5695

67

The Wax Room

Cnr Pease & Anderson St • Manunda

www.waxroom.com.au

4032 5888

82

VIP Furniture

Next door to Bunnings • Smithfield

www.vipfurniture.com.au

4038 5000

28


A mobile showroom that comes to you! Dancewear everything from top to toe

Shoes from beginner to professional, all styles available Costumes available, either secondhand or new

Tiaras and Crowns, both handmade and manufactured

Phone 4033 1355 Email cairnsdance@hotmail.com Web www.cairnsdance.com

Ilario & Glenda Pozzebon Cairns & Tablelands Ph: 0488 923 363

www.aussieskipbags.com.au


meet our

2012/13

mummy panel

As we have said previously, we really want this magazine to represent YOU. That is why we encouraged you to join our Mummy Panel, and what a great response we have had! Here are six local mums we believe represent the average mother’s of FNQ. They will be sharing some of their thoughts on parenting with our readers in upcoming editions of the magazine. Meet this year’s Mummy Panellists!

Liz Duffy from Kewarra Beach

Danielle Mitchell from Stratford Mum of 2 sons, ages 4 years and 1 year. “After

Mum of a one year old son and fur babies, Max

focusing at least 15 years on building my career I

the Cat and Ziggy the dog. “After tying myself

have recently found myself at a crossroads. Whilst

up in knots reading too many books and

I love my work, I love being a mum and so the

listening to so many health professionals and

majority of my week is dedicated to my two young

other mummies, the one thing I am sure of is

boys while still working part time.”

that there is no ‘typical’ baby.”

Kate Wilkinson from Manoora “I have two amazing daughters. Since I became a mummy, I have never been so happy, overwhelmed, stressed, scared, tired and alive.”

Sarah O’Bryan

Rachel Benton from Earlville

from Bentley Park

Mum of three, two sons aged five and two years, and

Mum of three-year-old son and six-month-

a one-year-old daughter. “I love to share advice as

old twins. “Who am I? The short version...

I feel it is so great to hear all the differing opinions

I am a mum to 3 beautiful, but exhausting

and strategies that Mums have. I also believe in

and often testing kids!”

judgement free parenting.”

Michelle Whitfield from Whitfield Mum of a three-year-old daughter and a two-yearold cat. “From breadwinner to Single SAHM (Stay-At -Home-Mum), my mummy experience is not the norm so there is something for everyone!”

www.parentingcompanion.com.au

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

47


PICTURED Bayview Heights toddlers Lincoln and Jovie WORDS Tarryn Sheehan – Family Support Worker - Cairns Early Years Centre

Ra isin g

s y o B s v s l r i G ender differences? a re th e re g

Gender may play some role in the characteristics of children, but ultimately they are all individuals. Our Play and Grow on a Wednesday

someone is using the toy they want to

boys and girls. The question now is, what

morning may seem like a familiar scene‌

play with. The days of stereo-typed play

to do with this information?

young boys running from activity to

are behind us. Girls and boys have new

activity, squabbling over trains and dump

freedom to play with whatever toy they

and language skills and fewer speech

trucks while the girls sit quietly at the craft

choose, allowing them to develop their

disorders (Blakemore, Berebaum & Liben,

table or playing with play dough.

self-confidence, self-efficacy and self-

2009), whereas boys display higher levels

worth. However, the debate between the

of hyperactivity and aggression, and lower

differences of raising a boy compared to a

levels of social competence (Prior, Sanson,

girl continues.

Smart & Oberklaid, 2000).

However, on a second look, this is not the full picture. The boys are tucking the babies in the crib, playing in the home corner, or dressed up in a tutu and

There is now an abundance of

On average, girls have greater verbal

Boys come with their own inherent

tiara, while the girls are building block

information available at our fingertips

strengths; their gross motor skills (running

towers for the sole purpose of knocking

that distinguishes the significant physical,

and jumping) develop faster, as does their

them over, or having a tantrum because

emotional and social differences between

visual integration (hand-eye tasks) (White,

48

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


2012). While both sexes have their strengths and weaknesses, there continues to be endless discussions on the difficulties of raising boys. Numerous books have now been written on the topic, with many of them implying it is the mother’s temperament, or the father’s lack of attention, that results in their child’s misbehaviour (Anderson, George & Nease, 2002). Where does such information leave parents who are expecting, or in the middle of experiencing, a boy? Instead of focusing on the specific gender differences and difficulties (because there are a lot of difficulties associated with raising girls as well!), it may be useful to remember that every child requires their carer to meet their individual physical, emotional and social needs in order for them to develop into a well-rounded, happy and resilient child. These needs are unique, not just to the sex, but to each and every child. Being attune and aware of your child, and their individual needs, will provide them with a secure base, something that will be fundamental to their well-being over their entire lifespan. A secure base will assist children to cope with fear and worry, explore with confidence, develop their ability to concentrate and learn, learn right from wrong, recognise and regulate their emotions, be aware of others’ feelings, and cope with separations and transitions (Daniel, Burgess & Antcliff, 2012). There are so many ways to bond with your child, most of which you will be doing on a daily basis. Spending time together, positive physical contact, making eye contact and smiling are all great ways to bond with your child, as is singing and laughing. These daily interactions also lead to additional development opportunities. Playing with your child not only gives you quality time together, it is also a great way to let them take the lead (choose the activity) and develop their talents and interests. By sitting back and describing what they are doing, rather than asking questions, your child’s creativity and independence will increase, as will their problem solving abilities and self-confidence. Regardless of whether you are raising a boy or girl, you will notice your child has particular interests, or seems to excel in different areas of their play. Recognising these special talents is one thing, however it’s also important that you celebrate these with your child through praise and encouragement! On the other hand, if you are noticing areas of your child’s development which you feel require additional attention, there are many things you can do in everyday play to promote attachment, language skills, social competence, fine and gross motor abilities, sustained attention, self-esteem, cooperation, positive behaviours and more. At the Cairns Early Years Centre we facilitate different programs and activities free of charge that incorporate strategies to develop your child’s physical, social and emotional wellbeing. Please contact the centre on 4045 0003 to find out more about our timetable and specialised services. Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

49


Spring Family Fashion

Girls and Boys Fedoras RRP $22 Bizzy Bubs Australia has a great range of new Season Spring Fashion lines in store. Ph: 0401 160 135 • www.bizzybubsaustralia.com

BellaBoo ruffled Gracie skirt with embellished T-shirt • $45 set Capri Pants sets and aprons also available. Beautifully handmade by local Mum. Call Carmel 0405 625 736

Breezy Top from $34.95 100% cotton. See more sun-savvy playwear for boys and girls at www.threesunpossums.com Ph: 0417 812 535

Seafolly girls, Rococo Rose Tutu Ballerina $59.95 (Sizes 2 - 7) • Cairns Central ph: 4041 1755 • The Pier Shopping Centre ph: 4041 5544 • Grant St Port Douglas ph: 4099 4484 www.splishsplashswimwear.com.au

Red Poppy Dress $109 Annie’s Ladies Boutiques, in Cairns & Palm Cove are open 7 days. Annie’s stocks silks, cottons, casual, after five, office wear, kaftans & accessories - Sizes 8 to 28. Annie’s Palm Cove: 4059 2112 Annie’s at Boland’s (14 Spence St, Cairns): 0406 214 144

Easy and affordable fashion for the family!

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


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Spring 2012Plaza Cairns Parenting Companion 51 Stockland Shopping Centre Ph: 4054 4338 • Mount Sheridan Ph: 4036 4391


to BAck

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

BED


Pizza

Pasta

What parent doesn’t love their kids’ bedtime? It’s that time you can start to actually unwind and have a little quiet time yourself. However, getting your toddler into bed is one thing, keeping them there is another. Consistent routine is the key to getting your toddler to bed and keeping them

Tips from our Mummy Panellists:

there. Start by introducing a calm and

Sarah:

consistent bedtime routine - bath time,

Reward charts and magic spray to keep away

drink (milk or water depending on your

the scary things (water and lavender oil in a

preference), brush teeth, toilet stop, story,

spray bottle).

cuddles and kisses and lights out. Ensuring all the essentials have been done so when

Rachel:

your toddler gets into bed, they have no

Involve bub in choosing ‘special’ bedding;

reason not to stay there. It is also important

I also had great success with the Tomy

to explain and set the expectation for your

Starlight dreamshow. Make a big deal about

toddler to stay in bed – explain that it is

bub being in their big boy/girl bed and try to

bedtime and ‘important to stay in your bed

be consistent with taking them back to their

and sleep so your body can rest and grow’.

bed if they wander out!

By setting the expectation and also covering all the potential obstacles to staying in bed, you are preparing them for success. If your toddler does get out of bed: The first time they get out of bed gently remind them it is bedtime, try not to enter into any lengthy discussions and lead her/ him back to bed, give a kiss and a cuddle, and then leave the bedroom. The second time, do the same thing but

Kate: When our eldest went into a ‘big bed’, she would scream and beat on the door. At first we used controlled crying but eventually we discovered that giving her cuddles and talking about her day in bed was a much better option for our toddler!

Michelle: Follow your bedtime routine strictly and

using fewer words, a brief kiss and cuddle

say good night. If you have a bedtime

and leave them again.

sobber, be strong and ignore it. She may be

From then on don’t say anything, just gently lead them back to bed, tuck them in with a loving pat then leave the room. Being gentle and consistent is important, it lets your child know you are there for them but you insist they sleep in their own bed. Depending on the age of your child, another technique that may make this process easier is the use of a rewards chart. Each night they follow the bed time routine and stay in their bed, they get a sticker/stamp along with your praise in the morning. Help them set a suitable reward, like a trip to the playground or a favourite family activity and after they achieve a set number of days of following the routine (the younger the child the quicker the reward needs to be given), they get their reward.

blog

singing rhymes in another 5 minutes! I have found that making some general noise like cleaning up the kitchen can give the child a sense of security because they know you are not far away.

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Danielle: Our four year old still won’t stay in his bed. The issue is compounded because he has a number of health issues including severe night terrors. We are currently in a state of surrender. He is required to start the night in his own bed (I lie there until he is asleep), but is allowed into ours in the night. We have even seen paediatric sleep specialists about his sleep issues. If anyone else has

0437 000 740 info@affordablecateringcairns.com.au www.affordablecateringcairns.com.au

the answer to this problem it would be the equivalent to finding the Holy Grail in our home.

Looking for some tips to bring the fire back into your sex life? Check out our new blog ‘Between the Sheets’ with Isiah McKimmie from Passionate Spirit. www.parentingcompanion.com.au

Sandwiches

Roasts

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


cher Teafeature During Christmas that year, EQ phoned to offer me my first job as a Principal on a remote island in the Torres Strait. I had butterflies, I was so excited. I moved to Mabuiag Island, and worked closely with the people to steer the school forward. I then moved to Lakeland – where I ran the school for two years. It was, and still is, some of my most motivating work. It was the best school with a great community of people who embrace their school.

CPC caught up with Mr. Mark Allen, Teacher and Deputy Principal at Trinity Beach State School Why did you become a teacher? I love working with people. I wanted to do something to make a difference to the lives of others – teaching is a special opportunity every day. I didn’t really enjoy my schooling – I was always in the group of kids who ‘toed the line’, and as a result, seemed to miss out. I focus my work on the majority of people; ie. I give 95 percent of my time, to 95 percent of people…so no one misses out. Tell us a bit about your teaching career? This is my 12th year as a teacher. I studied at JCU Cairns, where I was mentored by several inspirational people. I started out as a relief teacher – working in most schools in Cairns, until I kicked off at Redlynch SS with my own class. I taught year seven there for five years – which was a dream start. I then went to the Flexible Learning Centre in outdoor education, where I learned to work with troubled kids.

What would you say is the most rewarding thing about being a teacher? Working with people. People are a fantastic resource (young and old) – everyone has their story – and skills – and the trick as a leader is to uncover these talents, and enable them to have a go. Seeing people work to their best, and making time to celebrate along the way makes my job the best that education has to offer. What is the most challenging aspect of teaching? Working with people (let me explain)! Sometimes the competing priorities, and hectic nature of the environment makes the abovementioned quality work difficult to obtain…I aim to give everyone my support, and sometimes feel the pressure to offer support with limited timeframes.

Mr. Allen’s Nomination by Julia Wedding

Mr. Allen is an absolute legend!! Not only is he ‘wa y cool’, he plays guitar and strolls around the school spreading positive vibes and happiness, he is also motivating and even organised the world record for the Bik e Bus. He helps the community and is a all round happy DUD E. And I say DUDE cause that he is!! The kids love him and he is an inspiration. His genera l concern for each child is genuine ... I just wish I had a Mr. Allen when I was growin g up. Did I mention he’s a bit of a spunk!!!

WI N

WHO WILL BE OUR NEXT

TEACHER FEATURE? They could be an educator, mentor, coach or day carer. Just by nominating you could win one of three $30 Itunes cards from Talk to the Mac. PLUS our ‘Teacher Feature’ receives a $50 voucher from Harleys Educational Super Store and morning tea with thanks to The Cheesecake Shop Smithfield & Mulgrave Rd.

Nominate them now! Email your nominations to

win@parentingcompanion.com.au THANKS TO:

If you weren’t a teacher what you would be and why? I’m not good at many things – in fact, my downside perhaps is that I am too thinly spread. I am, however, suited to working with people. If I wasn’t teaching, I’d be working with people in some way. I’m enthused by knowing that I can help many others achieve their best. I work with a smile, and do my best every day. Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

55


WORDS Hayley Turner

Life

changer

Cancer... you know nothing will be the same agai n PICTURED Collette Adanczyk

Cancer isn’t the death sentence it used to be, but it does change everything. One day all is fine. The next day, you know nothing will be the same again. So many people live through that day – one in nine of us – according to some statistics. Being the adaptable creatures we are, we learn to live with it. Some of us improve ourselves in the process, become stronger; some even flourish because of suffering through the disease. Hayley Turner discovers the secret of survival for two resilient women, one 20-something and the other a grandmother. She recounts their stories through the eyes of those who love them most – a partner and a granddaughter.

My Fiancé had Breast Cancer Adam William talks about fiancé Collette Adanczyk On her 27th birthday, my fiancé wanted to give up. Her skin was too sensitive for makeup. Her hair was falling out and her only accessories were the bandages I put on her each day. She smelled like antiseptic.

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Collette was young, healthy and had no family history of cancer when we met seven years ago in Brisbane. We were at a party and I slurred some drunken line to her about being the most beautiful girl there.

her own eyebrows and draw on eyelashes,

We’ve had plenty of adventures together since. There was a move to Scotland. An engagement. A baby-on-the-way. A peasized lump we were told not to worry about. A baby, lost. New jobs. Then there was a lump the size of a fifty-cent coin; a diagnosis and a surprised doctor: breast cancer.

not seen for a very long time. She finally

We came home for treatment and it was bloody rough. Instead of attending meetings as a business energy consultant, her ‘new’ life was filled with hospital appointments and every one took a piece of her away. Soon she stopped coming out of her bedroom. “I look like an alien!” she screamed at me. Collette just wanted to look normal. She was losing herself. Not long after she was given a wig and some organic make-up, and with the help of her sister, mum and grandparents, Collette found her new ‘funky’ self. She went from blonde to brunette and even got to shape

after losing both during treatments. She said her body was a clean slate. I saw Collette returning to herself as she stood there, glowing with a smile I had felt ‘normal’ and she looked amazing. She told me she wanted to help others “find their funk and feel this freedom.” So after Collette finished her radiotherapy and chemotherapy, we launched our new organic cosmetics business – Find Your Funk. We donate a portion of every sale to the Committee of Oncology Unit Cairns Hospital (COUCH), so that Cairns Cancer sufferers don’t have to travel all the way to Townsville or Brisbane for treatment. We love our new business but the ‘cancer chapter’ is not over for us yet so we’re just enjoying those simple pleasures. Collette is still not 100 percent, but I’ve heard her boast, “I can get my hair into a ponytail now!” If you’d like to donate money to COUCH, visit www.couch.org.au or to become part of our story, visit www.findyourfunk.com.au


“It doesn’t matter if you’re 25 or 55, if you have family history or not; anyone can get cancer.” Breast cancer survivor, Collette Adamczyk. How do I find a lump? Get to know the look and feel of your breasts. How often should I check? Make a Cheeky Check-Up each day. What do I do if I find a lump? If you detect a change, see your GP. Where do I find more information? www.cheekycheckup.com.au or www.cancerqld.org.au To book a BreastScreen Queensland appointment call 13 20 50.

My Grandma had Breast Cancer Hannah Craven,9, talks about her

bit bored but I didn’t give up. While we

grandmother having breast cancer

organised the parade (which is like the

When I found out my grandma had breast

Relay for Life, but on horseback) my grandma

cancer and had to have an operation to

started going through treatment in Brisbane.

remove her breast I was really upset. All

She needed a lot of needles and different

these things were rushing through my head

medicines. I hoped they would make her

like, “What will happen to her? Will she pull

better.

through?” I got so scared so I went and sat on

When we spoke on Skype, I didn’t notice

a hill in the horse paddock to think and calm

she was wearing a wig but when we went to

myself down.

visit grandma in March, she had no eyelashes

A couple of days later I said to my mum,

or eyebrows. I told her that might be a good

“we should raise money for grandma and

thing, because now she doesn’t have to

other breast cancer patients.” I am nine and

pluck them!

Pink Ribbon Day

I love riding horses, especially Caspa who is my very own horse and best friend, so my

Raising money for Research

always been very supportive of us and I think

mum, riding instructor and I thought of the

she is being very brave and strong. I am

‘Pink Pony Parade’.

extremely proud of my grandma and I hope I

Mon 22nd of October

Every pink dollar raised makes a real difference for those affected by breast cancer, so please donate today.

www.pinkribbonday.com.au

We rang the Cancer Council Queensland

I love my grandma because she has

have made her proud of what I’ve achieved. I

and they helped us set-up a website for the

can’t wait to raise a lot of money at the ‘Pink

parade and organise a big raffle. I spent

Pony Parade’ and put a crazy wig on Caspa!

all day at Smithfield Shopping Centre

For more information about the Pink Pony

one Saturday selling raffle tickets. I got a

Parade check out Around Town on page 27.

Self-check:

GIVE YOUR CHILD THE JUMP START THEY DESERVE PHONE 07 4036 8111 PO Box 110E, Earlville Queensland 4870 email tas@tas.qld.edu.au | fax 07 4036 8222 TAS White Rock, Progress Road TAS Kewarra Beach, Poolwood Road

The first year of school sets a vital platform for your child’s future education. When you enrol your child in the TAS Prep Programme, Jump Start, you can be assured they will receive the best possible start to their schooling life. TAS Jump Start provides an enjoyable and nurturing environment with a stimulating curriculum that develops skills and confidence to set your child up for a prosperous TAS education from Jump Start to graduation.

Ju mp Start TAS PREP

TAS White Rock Kindy - Year 12 TAS Kewarra Beach Prep - Year 7

Visit www.tas.qld.edu.au or email our Admissions Officer at admissions@tas.qld.edu.au to make an appointment with one of our Early Childhood Specialists.

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

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EVERYBODY 58

ance D

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Now!


WORDS Sarah Thorne - FNQ Dance The benefits of getting your child involved with dance classes are numerous. Dancing is a fun, exciting form of physical fitness that develops gross motor skills, co-ordination and spatial awareness. Combining physical expression with musicality, good dance classes also nurture creativity and imagination, selfexpression and confidence. Posture, poise and discipline are amongst the better known attributes of dance training however it also teaches children to work as part of a team, develop a greater sense of trust and cooperation and make new friends. If your child suffers from shyness, dancing encourages them to reach out to other children of similar age and for some, similar feelings. Performing opportunities, whilst for some can be quite daunting, as confidence grows these moments often become some of the fondest memories for children growing up in the industry. According to EduDance, dance lessons can encourage children to foster a more positive attitude and explore their own self-expression. This can be particularly beneficial for children who are physically or mentally impaired or those who are attempting to deal with significant emotional problems. In many cases, children who participate in dance classes (like many other extracurricular activities) are more focused, develop great time-management skills and display increased confidence in

ERYONE SOMETHING FOR EV FNQ Dance Academy has a dance class suitable for every individual whether you are 2 or 72, a beginner or semi-professional.

40514888 • www.fnqdanceacademy.com.au

public. Not all children who attend dance classes are going to become prima ballerinas, musical stars, commercial back-up dancers or dance teachers – but most will use the skills developed at some stage in their life and will most certainly be glad they at least tried dancing in their childhood. FNQ Dance Academy was opened by Cairns local Sarah Thorne in January this year to meet a demand for a dance institution that catered for both ‘serious’ dancing training, and also ‘fun’ dance classes for fitness and enjoyment. There are playdance classes (two-three year-olds), in addition to classes in ballet, tap, modern, jazz, contemporary, hiphop, conditioning and pilates for children and adults. And that’s not the only local school offering something for the young and old. At Dance Connection Studios in Mareeba, children as young as two and a half years of age are encouraged to join in their ‘Big Steps, Little Feet’ class. This creative, exciting, core skills based class gives children a great foundation in dance technique while allowing them the freedom to express themselves in a safe and fun environment. Students learn how to move freely with an emphasis on enjoyment and a sense of adventure to build confidence and self-awareness. Dancing is not only a great skill to learn, it has many and varied health benefits. Sandra Kuhn, owner and principal of Centre Stage dance studios at

Choose Dance! • Dancing encourages physical activity from an early age; • Dancing develops musicality, creativity and imagination; • Dancing teaches the right posture and poise; • Dancing instils discipline; • It promotes team work and; • Dancing builds confidence and self esteem.

Yorkeys Knob began dancing at a young age to combat childhood asthma. “The doctors recommended something to help improve my lungs, so my mum thought dancing would be a good idea”, she said. “Little did she know when she took me to my first ballet lesson that 35 years later I would still be in love with it.” “Not only did my asthma improve, my confidence grew, and I developed a love of theatre and ballet which lead me to a professional career in the United Kingdom. I’ve now been teaching for 26 years and will be forever grateful that my mother decided to enroll me in that dance class.” Whether purely for fun and fitness, or for more serious focused training, one thing is certain; the benefits your child will gain from attending lessons is well worth the cost of each class, concert and pair of dance shoes!

An Investment In Your Child’s Future A highly professional dance school offering Classical Ballet, Jazz and Tap classes from beginners to advanced grades, in a friendly, safe environment. From fun classes once a week, to competition and examination levels, there is a something for every child. Email us today on: dancecon@bigpond.net.au

P: 4092 2632 • Walsh Street Mareeba Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

59


S C I H T E

Would you rather your child was smart or good? Your immediate answer was probably ‘both’. But what if you couldn’t have both? You probably eventually, perhaps even reluctantly, said ‘good’ (at least that way your child will come and visit you in the nursing home). Many families and almost all schools spend a great deal of time academically developing their children. This is a good thing. Yet I think it is at least as important for us to all think consciously about how we ethically develop the next generation to be decent members of society. WHERE DO CHILDREN GET THEIR VALUES? Children learn their ethics from all parts of the world around them: sometimes from school, their mates, church, their sports team or their ballet class. However, the main place that a child learns his or her system of ethics is from the home (no pressure, Mum and Dad). This should come as no great surprise to anyone — home is where a child spends most of his or her formative years. Children will learn consideration from how considerate their parents are. They will learn empathy from how much their parents care. They will learn generosity from watching how generous their parents are to others. It has always been so. In addition basic ethics is still delivered by parents in everyday interactions. ‘Share that toy with your sister’, ‘Wait your turn’

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

conversations to have with your children

etc are all ethical instructions, taught in an unremarkable way in most homes a dozen times a day. Ethically strong parents still can have children who cheat, lie and push old ladies over in the street — after all, parents are not a child’s only source of instruction. However, the positive example of parenting is invaluable. THE VALUE OF DISCUSSION Ethics and values should be spoken about regularly in homes. Every time your child comes home with an example of something ‘unfair’ that happened at school, this is an opportunity to speak about ethics. When an issue comes up on the television or in films, this is an opportunity to speak about ethics. I am not suggesting a return to the ‘good old days’ when children were simply told how to behave and be respectful. Indeed, I am almost suggesting the reverse. I am suggesting that ethical issues are discussed and pulled apart by the whole family in conversation and that your children are a central part in these conversations. HERE ARE A COUPLE OF QUESTIONS TO START THE DISCUSSION IN YOUR FAMILY: Accepting Differences: What would the whole world be like if everyone had the same opinions and abilities as you? What would be fun about it and what would be the problems?

Friendships: If someone really wants to be your friend, but you don’t like them very much, do you have to play with them at least sometimes? Lies: It there any such thing as a ‘white lie’? Is a ‘white lie’ okay or not okay? Remember, you can tell a child ‘You have to be tolerant of other people’ and he or she will hear ‘parent static’ and probably filter you out. But if you use situations and examples to discuss tolerance and guide them to their own conclusions your child will probably come to the view that tolerance is preferable to intolerance. The difference is that your child will have articulated the view themselves. The opinion will be his or hers and s/he will own it. Of course, better than each of these is to get them to practice tolerance — but a book can’t engineer that. Your first conversation now looms…. Enjoy it. This is an edited extract from Ethics 101, conversations to have with your kids by Michael Parker, published by Jane Curry Publishing Australia, RRP $24.95, available September 2012.


Got a Question?

every Wednesday you can...

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On sale from October 1

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Available from www.parentingcompanion.com.au, Good Start Early Learning Centres, selected SUPA IGAs, Bendigo Bank Branches and Catholic Primary Schools.

READERS’ SURVEY

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

61


Monday 24th Sept Friday 5th October

s y a d i l o School H Small Whitewater FUN!

The Young Company Theatre for children and young people! Discover the magic of drama with TYC. Participants make lots of new friends and improve their self-confidence, communication and presentation skills, finishing with a performance. Holiday and term programs available for 3yrs – 17yrs.

Aussie Drifterz off ers you a unique an d eco-friendly tour wi th small whitewater fun, suitable for ch ildren and adults ali ke. Tube through tree tunnels, freshwater snorkel, make natur al facepaints, swim or just chill out: it’s the best value tour in Ca irns! Awarded the 2011 Certificate of Excellence by TripAdvisor

Ph: 0401 318 475 www.aussiedrifterz.ne t

Multi-sport Madness! Every School Holidays on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday from 1pm to 3pm. All ages catered for. Come and play Indoor Cricket, Netball, Soccer, Beach Volleyball and Dodgeball.

169 Bunda St Cairns City

Ph: 4041 4066

www.theyoungcompany.com.au

Ph: 4032 2844

www.cairnsindoorsports.com.au

HEAVEN for Kids !

Loads of Kids Co ve activiti

New children’s

audio tours - ed ucational and fun at the m ulti-award winn ing Daintree Discov er y Centre locate d in the oldest tropical ra inforest in the wo rld. $78 less 20% di scount for loca l families includes return entr y for 12 mon ths!

Cow Bay, Daintre e

• Ph: 4098 9171

www.discoverthe

daintree.com

HAVE A CROC! The award winning Hartley’s Crocodile Adventures is a favourite school holiday destination. See the daily shows as they feed the crocs, koalas & cassowaries and get out the snakes! More crocodile experiences with the lagoon cruise and a visit to the croc farm.

Captain Cook Highway, Wangetti Beach ph 4055 3576 C AIRNS www.crocodileadventures.com

arentingcompanion.com.au/events ww62w.p Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

es including: pool games, sn orkelling lesson s, sand sculpture, pirate treasure hunts, mini-olympiad s, parachute pl ay, mask making and po ttery classes. Also indoor gam es including play station and Wii! Afforda ble childcare als o available.

www.novotelpa

Ph: 4059 1234

lmcove.com.au


PHOTO Sgt Scott Pottle with Samaila Montajes

A Community Project Cairns PCYC WORDS Hayley Turner

I am ashamed to say I have never been in

young people as an alternative to antisocial

a PCYC before, so when my editor gave me

behaviour,” Sgt Pottle said.

the assignment, I jumped at the chance to investigate. As I walked through the cheerful, new building, I was surprise to find a girl swinging from the ceiling, a boy on stilts and a gym full of people next to this strange ‘circus class’ underway. Sergeant Scott Pottle has been the

“The police are a partner and supply all the (PCYC) managers but they don’t give us any money. We have to generate our own income,” Sgt Pottle said. Generating that income hasn’t been a problem. In 2001, the facility brought in $88,000 and employed just six staff. This year the PCYC turned over $1.6 million and

manager of the Cairns PCYC for more than a

sent out 105 group certificates, according to

decade. He’s seen kids grow into respected

Sgt Pottle.

young adults and he’s watched the facility develop from a small establishment to the $6 million facility it is now. “We did a massive $3 million extension a couple of years ago,” Sgt Pottle said. “There’s a new gym, canteen and spin room and now we have programs like Tae

The money goes straight back into projects like the Health and Wellbeing Pilot Program, which offers children free sporting

• Literacy and Numeracy program based on the outcomes from the Australian National Curriculum • Qualifed Registered Teachers • Recognition of individual learning needs • One on one or Small Groups • Great for children that need to develop more confidence with their learning or those that need extending

School Readiness AgES 2 to 5 yEArS • Encourage a love of learning

Samaila Montajes and targets at-risk 12 to 17-year-olds. “There’s a lot of temptation (for young

performance. A lot of people aren’t aware of

Montajes said. “There is also a financial

what we do,” Sgt Pottle said.

barrier and a lot aren’t able to afford gym fees or other sport and recreation activities.

profit organisation. It is successful because

It is a pilot program to help them stay out

it looks and functions like a commercial

of trouble. It gives them the opportunity to

gym but memberships are cheap (you can

get involved in sport. About 30 kids came

go to the gym for $7.95 a week) and all the

to play badminton recently, and they really

money goes back into the facility or into

enjoyed themselves. It was nice to see them

community projects which benefit the

with smiles. I want them to feel good about

young folk of Cairns.

coming here.”

sport and recreation activities to mainly

PrEP to yEAr 6

• Develop social & emotional skills

people) to eat fast food and takeaway,” Ms

“The PCYC’s primary role is to provide

Primary Tutoring

activities and talks on nutrition. It is run by

Kwon Do, boxing, cheerleading, and circus

The idea is simple. The PCYC is a not-for-

Let no child ever come to us without leaving happier, smarter and more confident.

• Letter names & sounds • Small groups - 1hr classes • Numbers to 20 • Full-colour workbooks • Games & hands-on activities • Fine motor & handwriting skills • Degree qualified & experienced teacher

To find out more about Cairns PCYC call 4053 1532 or visit www.cairnspcyc.org

10/146 Anderson Street, Manunda P: 0407 536 587 E: cairns@beginbright.com.au

Spring 2012 www.beginbright.com.au Cairns Parenting Companion 63


G N I w Groa

y t i n u Co m m p er

PHOTO Fun and games on our street in Kanimbla

anita So WORDS Ju

Do you live in a great neighbourhood? We’re looking for the best street in the region! Take a photo of yourself (with your street sign displayed) and tell us all about your wonderful neighbourhood. Join the CPC mission to build better communities.

Submit your entry at www.parentingcompanion.com.au 64

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


PHOTO Kanimbla Crew

For a lot of us living in Cairns, family is a long way away so your neighbours, friends and community can play a very important role in making us feel supported and loved. Growing up in a small community like

TRADITION

Babinda brings back fond memories of

Start a street tradition. It could be an

exploring the local creeks with my friends,

annual barbeque, a street cricket match

playing cricket in the park with the kids

or Halloween party. Maybe even a street

from the neighbourhood, foraging the vegie

garage sale. Put yourself in charge and

patch with Dad, saying hi to the newsagency owners as I picked up the latest copy of Dolly

make it happen!

Magazine, visiting Mrs Maloney for some

BEAUTIFY

home-baked peanut butter biscuits, riding

Work with local council to get your

my bike around Mill Road or snogging Peter,

neighbourhood looking the best and

the cute, new neighbour on his rooftop. We

providing the best for your community.

were carefree, safe and completely happy.

Maybe you need your local park upgraded,

Well, except for that rooftop snog that is! This is the kind of community we’d all like our kids to grow up in. So what does it take

safer bike paths built or better street signage – it doesn’t hurt to ask!

to grow that kind of community?

GROW

Here’s a list of things we suggest

garden? It’s a great way to teach the kids

you could start with:

about nature; great for the environment

WALK Hit the streets with the dog and the kids and get to know your immediate neighbourhood. Time it late in the afternoon or during the weekend when families are more likely to be around. Both dogs and kids make great icebreakers. THINK LOCAL The best way you can help your local community is to support it. So next time you need something, think local! Ask around for local tradies. Pay a visit to the roadside fruit and vegetable traders, the mudcrab man or the kids washing cars for charity. Maybe

Why not start a communal vegetable

and a great way to bond with your greenthumbed neighbourhood friends. SHARE THE LOAD Next time you walk to the local park, offer to take your neighbour’s kids too! Think about car-pooling or bike busing to school. Sharing the load is not only smart, it’s also a great to give each other a bit of time out. VOLUNTEER

Spring into Sun SAFETY!! This Spring be sure to download the Cancer Council’s free SunSmart app. Check the UV Alert when you’re out and about. www.cancerqld.org.au to download. Also remember to:

SLIP on sun-protective clothing: long

sleeves and high necks, close weave material like cotton

SLOP on broad spectrum, water

resistant SPF 30+ sunscreen, 20 minutes before going outdoors and every two hours afterwards. There’s no regulation about labelling as ‘Children’s Sunscreen’ but thicker formulations may offer better coverage.

SLAP on a hat: Broad brim, legionnaire

or bucket style that protects face, head, neck and ears with a close weave material. Seek shade and Slide on sunglasses that meet Australian Standards.

Join a local volunteer organisation or your school’s P&F! There’s plenty of unpaid work

Brought to you by:

needing to be done and the satisfaction you get from giving back to your community is a

even enlist the neighbour’s teenager for

great feeling.

babysitting duties.

PS: my neighbours are the best of the bunch!!!

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Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

65


Abbott Medical Clinic Stockland Earlville

Caring for Your Family

Dr Garry Hartrick is pleased to welcome Dr Serena Keating, the new partner at the clinic

To make an appointment phone 40337666

l l

l

l l l

66

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


WORDS Isiah McKimmie - Somatic Sex Therapist with Passionate Spirit

W hy s e x i s T N A T R O P M I When you crawl into bed at the end of a long day, sex is often the last thing you feel like. For some women, it becomes just another chore. But sex forms an important part of your relationship and it can have surprising benefits for both of you. It probably seems like there are so many higher priorities than ‘getting intimate’ with your partner; kids to be picked up, bills to pay, dinner to cook, sleep to be had... and of course there’s limited privacy with kids in the house. You probably want to share connection and intimacy in other ways like spending time together, talking and just cuddling. And then get a good night’s rest! But prioritising sex is important. It’s important for our relationships and our overall wellbeing. Sex is a great way to sustain the intimacy and bond between you, and can pave the way for the other kinds of intimacy you may prefer. Our sex lives, though, require some attention and effort. Most commonly sex is more desired by men than women. Generally, sex to a man is their way of feeling close and connected

to you - sex helps him feel loved. Women generally need to feel loved in order to want sex. Difference in desire is a big problem in many relationships. If you’re suffering sexual difficulties such as a consistently low libido, painful sex or the inability to achieve orgasm, there may be other factors at play so seek professional advice. There are even benefits for your children. If you and your partner are happy and you have a strong relationship this is going to positively affect your children. Your kids are more likely to be happy when they sense that you are really happy and they get to see a healthy, happy relationship (increasing their chances of having a great relationship themselves). There are also health benefits to be had for both of you. Sex boosts your immune system, keeping colds and flu’s at bay. The Wilkes University in Pennsylvania, found that having sex once or twice a week increased production of the immune-boosting antibody immunoglobulin by a third. Sex relieves stress and lowers your

blood pressure. Those who engage in regular sexual activity are more relaxed and can better handle stress than those who don’t according to a study by Stuart Brody, a psychologist at the University of the West of Scotland. Sex significantly lowers your risk of heart attack and stroke. A study at Queens University in Belfast found that having sex three times a week could actually halve the risk of heart attack or stroke. Sex burns calories and tones muscles. And you don’t even need to get out of bed to do it! Sex helps your brain release loads of endorphins, hormones and neurotransmitters (like oxytocin and serotonin) that help combat depression and make you feel happy and help you feel energised. You might be tired at the end of the day but, just like a brisk walk in the fresh air or a session at the gym can spark you up again, so can a quick romp in the hay! So even if you’re not in the mood, don’t dismiss the idea right away. You could have more to gain than you realise!

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Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

67


Cairns #1 Preschool and kindergarten entertainer

playdate at

e-mail: info@theamazingachacha.com.au phone: (0437) 707-090 web: www.theamazingachacha.com.au

Facepainting and MENT FREE ENTERTAIN Bring your mothers group or meet some new people. Muddy’s are putting on a morning tea and all regular coffee, tea or hot chocolates are only $3. Money raised to benefit local char ities.

EVERY 2ND TUESDAY OF EACH MONTH 9.30 - 11.30AM 11th SEPT • 9th OCT • 13th NOV Bookings are essential for catering purposes. Please email playdate@parentingcompanion.com.au

see you there!

Muddy ’s Wicked Wedne sday ’s

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Every Wednesday from 5pm! Great family meal deals, free face painting by Nikki the Clown and fun for all! Ph 4051 0388 for more info.

174 ESPLANADE • CAIRNS

68

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


WORDS Alfio Sciacca - Alfio Sciacca Accountants

I NVESTING in a

We all know the term ‘cash is king’! But for most of us, as a result of the financial downturn and decline in property values, cash is in very short supply. Right now, there are plenty of ‘cheap’ properties for sale, but many families have their cash invested in their family homes and, or investment houses. So the problem is, due to the lower valuations of properties there is effectively less cash for people to invest in new property. The affect of this is that people who haven’t got cash sitting in the bank are missing out on opportunities to grow their assets and build their nest egg. But the reality is that most families do have cash,

they just don’t know it. Building wealth will lead to a better retirement, and what do we all have that is sitting there for our retirement? Superannuation. Most mums and dads will have a fair bit stashed away in superannuation. In most cases a combined total of as low as $80,000 is enough to economically start a self-managed super fund where mum’s and dad’s super can be joined. Below is an illustration of the price of property a superfund could afford depending on the balance in funds it has. These figures are indicative, banks have differing lending criteria. This chart sole purpose is to illustrate the potential capacity to buy property within a self managed

SUPER

idea

super fund. The bank will also do an income analysis to ensure the fund can afford the loan value. It sounds simple and it is, so long as you get good advice, have the structures set up correctly, and work within the superannuation laws. Anyone can have a very healthy portfolio of properties and assets in their very own superfund, which will better enable them to reach their retirement goals. And to finish on a more regional outlook, just think of the money that will be poured into our local economy instead of sitting in superannuation slush funds. Imagine the difference that would make.

BELOW: THE TOTAL COST OF HOUSE INCLUDING LEGALS, A SUPERFUND COULD AFFORD, DEPENDING ON THE BALANCE OF THE SUPER FUND.

Cost of House and Legals Mum and Dad Super Balance 35% deposit Bank Loan using a Borrowing Trust

$ 228 571

$ 257 143

$ 285 714

$ 428 571

$ 714 286

$ 1 142 857

$ 80 000

$ 90 000

$ 100 000

$ 150 000

$ 250 000

$ 400 000

$ 148 581

$ 167 143

$ 185 714

$ 278 571

$ 464 286

$ 742 857

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

69


Veg ie

s r e l g g u m S

(www.vegiesmugglers.com.au), With thanks Mungalli Creek and Vegie Smugglers es. Visit In the Kitchen on here are 2 great recipes for home or school lunch ntingcompanion.com.au our website for more fabulous recipes www.pare

Chicken Sausage Rolls 5 sheets frozen puff pastry 500g chicken mince 1 carrot, peeled, grated 1 zucchini, grated 1 onion, grated (or you can whizz these 3 ingredients to save time, but avoid pulping out all the texture) 3 medium mushrooms, finely diced 125g can brown lentils, rinsed, drained 1 egg 2 tbsp chopped fresh herbs (basil and chives are good) Salt & black pepper 1 egg, whisked, for glazing

Apple Sultana Mini Muffins 1¼ cups self-raising flour ½ cup brown sugar ½ cup All-Bran 1 tsp ground cinnamon ½ cup sultanas ¾ cup milk ½ cup grapeseed oil 1 egg 1 apple, grated

Preheat oven to 200C. Lay out your pastry sheets on a bench. Cut each in half to make 2 rectangles. Mix together all the remaining ingredients until combined. Spread the mixture lengthwise along the middle of the rectangles. Ease pastry over from one edge, brush egg along top side then roll other edge over to seal. Cooking - If cooking immediately, cut each stick into 4 pieces, place on an oven tray lined with baking paper, brush with egg and cook in middle of the oven for 25 minutes until golden and cooked through.

For dairy that is delicious, healthy and a great lunchbox staple, try Mungalli Creek. Award- winning local producers of bio-dynamic milk, yoghurt and soft cheeses. www.mungallicreekdairy.com.au

Preheat oven to 180°C. Grease and line 24 mini-muffin holes with paper cases. Sift the flour, add the sugar, All-Bran, cinnamon and sultanas and mix lightly. Place the milk, oil, egg and apple in another bowl and whisk well. Pour the wet ingredients into the dry. Fold in until just combined. Divide the mixture evenly between the muffin cases. Bake for 15–18 mins until golden and springy.

book giveaways 70

Keeping it Fresh!

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

For your chance to win a copy of Vegie Smugglers, head to our website competitions page and tell us your favourite Vegie Smuggling tip or recipe. Send your entry to win@parentingcompanion.com.au


Putting pieces together for a healthier North

Counselling, Programs, Training

We’ve all heard of the saying, “laughter is the best medicine” and that’s the thinking behind building a state of the art, outdoor playground and activity centre for sick children at the Cairns Base Hospital. Last year, there were 2,308 children cared for by a dedicated team of paediatric nurses and physicians with some children requiring up to 103 days of care. Sick kids and their families need to be able to get out and breathe fresh air and this new Paediatric Playground, transforming the rooftop deck right beside the Children’s Ward, will provide a place for them to escape the harsh reality of treatment. Exercise and rehabilitation through active play will be supported by an outdoor physiotherapy area with other features like a playroom, pool table, stage area, arts and crafts room, sensory room, fish tanks, shade structures and garden features, all helping in the plan to bring a smile to a child’s face. The Far North Queensland Hospital Foundation has, as of August 2012, raised $738,066.29 but much more is needed. There are many ways you can help contribute to the $1.2 million price tag needed to finish the project. Visit www.fnqhf.org.au to find out more information. And make sure you look out for the 2013 Fundraising Calendars on sale for $10 from the 1st of October around Far North Queensland.

embracing potential

A holistic approach to education, health and wellbeing during the early years. Equip your child with the skills to become a successful lifelong learner. • QLD Government approved Kindergarten program • Owned & operated by Montessori early childhood teacher/local mum • Whole/raw food focused program • Daily yoga sessions • Extended day operation 7am till 6pm (CCB available) • 15 months to 6 years

9 Brose Street White Rock QLD 4868 Contact us at cairnsmontessori@gmail.com • ph: (07) 4036 1055

www.cairnsmontessori.com.au Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

71


Come along for an up close wildlife experience and see some of Australia’s unique animals! For just $50 get an unlimited d Family Pass vali for 1 year!

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

| Phone: (07) 4046 1111 | Email: cairns@wgc.com.au | Visit: www.wgc.com.au * Eddy Lago and Amanda Millyard are QLS Accredited Specialists in Family Law


Proudly brought to you by:

Recycle PLASTICS

Bottles and containers that have the recycling logo with the numbers 1 to 5. Remove lids, rinse and flatten.

PAPER Newspapers, magazines, all cardboard (inc pizza boxes, milk, juice cartons). Remove food scraps and flatten.

Recycle In an era of ‘disposability’ we have little value for ‘things’, and if something is no longer wanted or is broken the simple answer is ‘throw it away’. But with each Aussie throwing on average 2,100kg of waste per year and majority of this going to landfill, we need to start paying attention and teaching the next generation the benefits of ‘Reduce, Reuse & Recycle’ before our planet becomes something similar to the movie Wall-E. There are so many ways we can ‘Reduce’ waste in our homes. Here are a few easy ways to get started: KIDS LUNCHBOXES: Instead of buying those individual packaged items, purchase one large packet then split the snacks into small lunch containers. Buying in bulk means you also save money. BUY IN BULK: The more items you can buy in bulk the less packaging you will send to landfill in the long run. COMPOST: Invest in a compost system (or better still make your own from an old

Reduce Reuse Recycle

container that would have gone to landfill – google it!) and instead of throwing out all the food scraps, have them turned into the best food for your garden! REUSE: So many of us don’t feel comfortable with the Reuse but it really can be a case of one person’s trash is another’s treasure. Instead of simply tossing items you no longer need or want, look at giving them to one of the charities. Alternatively why not give one of the online buy, swap, sell sites a go. You can turn your unwanted junk into $$ and pick up some great bargains. Start an arts and crafts box. Kids are great at finding ways to turn rubbish into something fantastic. If you need some ideas, simply turn on Playschool and check out the amazing things they make from rubbish.

Recycle GLASS

All glass bottles and jars. Remove lids and rinse.

ALUMINIUM & STEEL CANS All types of aluminium and steels cans. Rinse and remove food scraps and plastic lids, and empty aerosols.

Recycle TEACHING YOUR KIDS the basics of recycling is not only environmentally good but can be fun too. See above as to what can be recycled and how to ‘prepare’ each item. It is important to remember to never put these items in plastic bags before being put in the bin, the bags can not be recycled and by placing items like plastic bags and other non-recyclables this can mean your entire neighbourhood’s collected becomes non-recyclable! For more information about what you can and can’t put into your Yellow Bin, visit www.cairns.qld.gov.au

NATIONAL RECYCLING WEEK

12th – 18th November Why not get your home, school or workplace involved!

Rainbow Fair and Open Day • 10am-4pm Saturday 8th Sept • 46 Boyles Rd, Kuranda

Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

73


$ $ $ $ $$$ $$$$

$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $

$

$

$

$

WORDS Kim Kelly -Advance Cairns

For marketing to be effective you need

Implementation

to have a strategy in place rather than

Now you know your audience and your

just making ad hoc decisions – they

USP it’s time to think about the channels

simply don’t work. Here’s a rundown to

you’ll use to reach your prospects; print,

help get results.

TV, radio, online, direct marketing, social media, public relations.

Prepare your strategy Write down your blueprint for the next 12

Create an action plan

months. It’ll give you something to work

You can create this in a spreadsheet

towards and reflect on next year.

detailing what month you plan to

Objectives

do your activity and how much you

What do you want to achieve with your

will spend.

marketing? Do you want to sell more?

Measure your results

Launch a new product or service to the

You need to learn what works and

market? Expand into new markets? Build

what doesn’t and to do this you’ll need

your brand awareness? These objectives

to measure the number of enquiries

will help shape the messages in your

$

$

$

get a rough idea of what your cost per

Define your target audience

response is. When you measure this

Who do you want to reach? Where do

ongoing you’ll know the best place to

they live, how old are they? Be sure the

spend your marketing dollar.

Getting $ $ $ more $ $out $ of your marketing dollar $ $ $ $ $ $

$

and web traffic. You should be able to

marketing activity.

media you choose reflects this market.

Don’t forget the TOP TIPS for effective

Look at your competition.

marketing

Who are they? What do they do better or worse? What do they charge?

a IMPACT – communicate your USP and give people a reason to choose you

Do a SWOT

b FREQUENCY – you can’t advertise

Now you know what your competition

once and expect an overwhelming

are doing you can detail your Strengths,

response, you need frequency to

Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats

increase your chances of being noticed and staying top of mind

Define your USP Your USP is your Unique Selling

c CONSISTENCY – don’t think you

Proposition. This is the real or perceived

need to say a different message in

benefit of a good or service that

each ad. Think of the big guys like

differentiates it from competing brands

Commonwealth Bank and Coke. They

and gives the buyer a logical reason

repeat the same message over and

to prefer it over other brands. To me

over until it sinks in

this is the key to effective marketing.

d RELEVANCE – make sure your

Too often I see ads that don’t tell me clearly why I should choose their product

message is targeted, if it’s not it won’t

over another.

mean anything to anyone.

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012


A BrAnd new dAnce School openS in cAirnS!

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Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

75


Dear Dave I’ve just had my third child and I finally got one of those dream babies - she eats and sleeps like a champ. She’s an absolute dream.... do you think I should number four and get it in writing now

I have been with my partner for almost

before the dream ends? Cheers, Bec -

eight years now and we don’t have any

Editor, Cairns Parenting Companion

kids. Any advice to get him to hurry up any younger... and neither is he! Thanks so much for your well-rounded advice

with my column, again. I see that now

as always. Anonymous on request

lot more free time to harass me about

Dear Anon, This is pretty drastic and it goes

deadlines and how important they

against the grain to betray the ‘Man

are, (oh look, my phones ringing, and

Code’, and it may seem counter

it’s you!) and how I’m letting the team

productive to your ultimate goal, but

down, and how blah, blah, blah. Okay,

have you tried calling ‘last drinks’. And

that’s not a fair representation. Because

I’m not talking about alcohol.

you would never waste three potentially admonishing words on me with just blah, blah, blah. And yes, I think you should definitely try to convince hubby to have number four, and then numbers five, six and seven. In fact round it out to ten because for purely selfish reasons the more times you slip between the sheets to either make babies or have them, the more my tardiness slips under the radar. You’ll be way too distracted and hopefully lose all track of time with ‘baby brain’; like my sister-in-law who peeled

Parenting advice dished out, Dave style!

and pull his finger out? I am not getting

Apologies for being three weeks late

sleeps like a champ it’s given you a

wa r ner

Dave

Dear Dave

you have a dream baby that eats and

Dave

it’s you! So have another baby already!

try to convince my hubby to have

G’day Bec!

DEAR

There goes my phone again Bec, and even though it says ‘blocked’, I know

Ironically enough that’s what my wife did … but at the other end of the spectrum. She called ‘last drinks’ until I had a vasectomy and by god it worked. ‘Last drinks’, they’re the two words a bloke fears the most. Except my father-in-law, in whose case ‘your shout’ tops the list. I mean really, one of our functions is to procreate and if he’s not interested he may as well put the plough back in the ‘pants shed’ until the season says it’s time to sow.

potatoes for dinner and then couldn’t

You should also probably stop him from

find them until she went to the post

visiting shopping centres during the

office the next day, where they fell out of

school holidays, that’s enough to deter

her handbag and onto the counter.

anyone from having kids. Dave

weekdays from 5.30am Bel

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

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Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

77


Mu m

Behaving

badly

If someone had told me five years ago

that lay below. I have gone searching,

that there would be a time … not too far

on the occasional naughty night, for a

away … when Spongebob Square Pants

pretty piece to titillate my hubby, but

would have nicer underwear than me, I

soon realized that these naughty pieces

would have pulled their piece of bum-

were what got me into trouble in the

fluff so hard that their wedgie from hell

first place.

would have to be removed with a forklift. Alas, it has happened and my top drawer, which was once filled with silky negligees and corsets, is now bursting at the seams with fifty shades of beige. I was expecting beige when I first fell pregnant but I thought it would take the form of mashed arrowroot biscuits. I didn’t, for the life of me, think it would permeate into my catalogue of g-strings and lacy bras. But I should have realized that that was the tepid dive my knickers were taking when I lost my ‘g’ halfway under my crotch when I was eight months pregnant. After my first baby was born there was a slight temptation to step through the two pieces of string, but there was a competing need to protect the tenderness of my delightful

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well. I like to pretend that the matching beige maternity bra’s that I bought by the dozen, were hiding a sinister sexy secret … deeply hidden by the milk-pads which were sodden half the time. I liked to think that my maternity bras were a Madonna-ish attempt at exposure. Pull the tag and woo-hoo, nipples exposed. Okay, so I was only exposing myself to a three-month-old, but it gave me a little thrill that I could walk down the street, pushing a pram and be a quick flick away from singing ‘Like A Virgin’. And my knickers made great car-washing rags when holes started appearing. I also no longer feel the need to ‘adjust’ my g-string in

episiotomy. Needless to say, the raw

public … and can happily say that you’ll

wounds, and the purchase of a five pack

never see me with a visible panty line.

of granny knickers, won out over my

The fact that I wear cargo pants and a

need to emulate a post-baby Victoria’s

vomit-streaked T-shirt on a daily basis is

Secret underwear model.

irrelevant.

And over the course of a few years

Ah yes – my underworld is not black,

my stash of beige wide-sides has

but beige, and while the hubby remains

accumulated and the piles of beige have

colour-blind and still likes to see me

camouflaged the flimsy delicate pieces

without knickers, that’ll do for me.

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

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Man

Tucker Time!

! e s u o h e h t t u o ab None of the following is representative of the views of Cairns Parenting Companion and for reasons of personal safety the author wishes to remain anonymous. Yep! He’s a bloke and he’s confused.

The old saying used to go; “you are what

a spider, two grasshoppers and a tube of

it was the gaseous output that became

you eat”. If that were true then for the years

toothpaste I think we did alright feeding

distressing. After about a week we

before kids came into my life I was nothing

our kids properly. Vegies were never an

discovered a shared intolerance to soy

more than a Mrs Macs Chunky beef’n’

optional extra in our home. Every meal

that was creating a fair bump in the worlds

cheese pie and a couple of beers.

had it’s regulation vegetable content and

methane count and made it necessary to

even with ‘seconds’ the kids had to include

avoid naked flames in the home at all costs.

Then came the National Eat Right campaign that claimed; “what we eat today, walks and talks tomorrow”. Is it just me, or does that sound like a great premise for a B Grade horror movie about feral faecal phantoms that emerge menacingly from the family toilet? While I’m not big on catchy slogans, when it came to family eating habits having children in our life was certainly a wake-up call for my wife and I. We both began to really look closely at the sides of food packaging to see what additives were in our family tucker. It all became a mysterious and scary numbers game of preservatives, flavour enhancers and

vegies.

And after dinner? No dessert sorry!

The dining habits we developed by

Thankfully the kids never seemed to make

necessity in our sizable family, I think were

a big deal of this unofficial policy. We just

generally positive and beneficial. I could

never got into the habit of eating a sugary

start the menu description with breakfast

bowl full of E900 Dimethyl Polysiloxane

but really wheat-bix and milk will become

with a delicious sprinkling of Carnauba

a family mainstay at just about any time

903! (refer to B Grade horror movie again).

of the day when there are growing boys

So there it is. Tucker time in our house

in the house. Speaking of milk; we were

over the years in a protein enriched, low fat

doing six litres a day at our peak period.

nutshell. Not an unusual story really, as I’m

And in spite of about a dozen x-rays and a

sure, like us, most parents try and do what’s

suspected fractured skull we had our first

right for their kids nutrition-wise.

broken bone with boy number one at the age of 20 on a skateboard.

We’ve certainly been blessed with healthy, active children without any issues

One culinary ‘blind alley’ however, involved Textured Soy Protein. Back in

with obesity or eating disorders so I guess

the soy hey day I gave it a go as a healthy

the saying is pretty true. What we eat

supplement to our daily carnivorous

today, does walk and talk tomorrow ... and

snail, dog food, jellybeans from under the

carvings. Whilst it was a honourable

is expecting a hearty serving of Dad’s Pasta

lounge, assorted coins, random toys parts,

attempt at reducing our red meat input,

Bake tonight so I better scoot.

colouring. Generally though, aside from the odd

Garage S ale

Go to our website to BUY or SELL pre-loved kidstoys, clothing and furniture.

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www.parentingcompanion.com.au Spring 2012 Cairns Parenting Companion

81


Mother-in-law AKA Monster-in-law!

onfession CBOX mum’s

Proudly brought to you by:

I confess... I have always been taught

items’ to our list and just expects they are

this as my hubby and her have had the

‘If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say

bought… Oreos, licorice and BBQ salted

conversation numerous times, however,

anything at all’ but I reckon a public

cashew nuts (those aren’t cheap).

she still feeds our kids CRAP every chance

anonymous confession doesn’t count,

Cleaning: She helps out which is great,

she gets. We go out to the playground for

right? Don’t get me wrong, I actually

but as she’s doing it she makes comments

like my Mother-in-law (MIL), its just she’s

about how she worries about the family

is a ‘little bit’ kind of a person – ‘A little

as it looks like I can’t ‘keep up with the

bit’ here and ‘a little bit’ there. This rule

housework’.

some fun, she will bring lollies or biscuits of some description and give them to the kids (usually while I am packing all the bits into the car to head home). Or right before bed, as we are trying to wind them

usually serves me well, until a few weeks

I am a working mum, and I don’t

ago when she came to stay with us for a

particularly care if the cobwebs aren’t

‘visit’, and is still here!

pulled down every week or the tops of

Here are my vents:

the doorways are completely dust free.

Groceries: We have a set budget, which

I would rather spend the time playing

we are pretty good at sticking to and

with my kids then having a completely

eating well within it. Since she’s been

sparkling house.

here it has completely blown out and

Feeding the kids CRAP: We believe it is

few tactics to overcome these issues but

there has not been one offer to purchase

important to feed our family healthy food

to date I have not had any luck. I will keep

anything herself or to contribute to the

and having the occasional treat is ok,

trying in hope that one day she gets the

weekly shop. On top of that she adds ‘her

but all within moderation. My MIL knows

picture. From frustrated Daughter-in-Law

down she offers them desert. We are not a ‘desert eating’ family! They are then on a sugar high for the next hour and we are the ones who have to deal with the craziness. These are just a few of the things she does that drive me mad… I have tried a

Email your anonymous confessions to confessions@parentingcompanion.com.au

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Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012

Cairns Parenting Companion Spring 2012  

Our Spring 2012 Edition

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