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Contents

… to the autumn edition of The Malmesbury Jackdaw. We trust you’ve had a good summer and have been able to take advantage of the new normal. It was great to see that the carnival managed some “proper” events again this summer although totally understandable that prolonged uncertainty meant that the procession had to wait for another year. It’s also encouraging to see the High Street looking busy again, we hope that those traders who have survived the last 18 months will prosper.

3. Latest Update - Malmesbury Primary Care Centre 4. A Disturbing Trend - Rising Crime 5. Coming to Malmesbury Soon? - Over 400 New Homes 7. End of an Era - Flora and Flesh 8. End of an Era - Where did all the Banks go? 11. Open letter from the Carnival Committee 12. Carnival photos

14. Royal Visit - A Queen, a Prince and a Vacuum Cleaner 16. The Old School Yard - All those years ago. 17. Seasonal Cheer

Thanks to our advertisers and distributors for 18. Test Your Local and General Knowledge - Quiz sticking with us and to all those who 19. Malmesbury’s Past - Malmesbury Voices regularly send us articles and photos - if only 21. Tiger Attack!- Hannah Twynnoy. more readers would do that. 22. Local Musician, Chris Gibbon - The Gibbon Returns! We hope you enjoy this edition and may we 23. Exercise and Chat - RunTalkRun be the first to wish you a Very Merry Chr … What? To soon? Not according to the adverts 24. And finally - The Crossword on TV. Richard, Raphe & Andy The Malmesbury Jackdaw Team At this time of year, we’d like to offer our thanks and respect to those Malmesbury folk who lost their lives in conflict preserving the freedom that we enjoy and is envied by so many.

We’re always looking for stories to include so if you’re aware of something interesting or important relating to Malmesbury then please check out the editorial policy on our website (www.themalmesburyjackdaw.co.uk) and submit an article. If you would like to discuss any ideas you might have first then drop our editor an e-mail. To contribute contact Andy at editortmj3@gmail.com To place an advert contact Raphe at ral43.tmj@gmail.com For the website or distribution contact Richard at richard.harris61@icloud.com Copyright©TheMalmesburyJackdaw, 2019


Latest Update Patient Survey It’s been a strained time for General Practice. The pandemic meant that we had to adapt to new ways of working and make rapid changes in order to keep our patients and staff safe from the spread of Covid19. While we still need to be cautious, we recognize it is time to make some changes again and so we published our Patient Survey to gather your thoughts and feedback. We’d like to say a big thank you to the 1,701 patients who responded, be it online or via paper form. We will be working through your suggestions, so you may notice some changes over the coming months. You can keep up to date at www.malmesburypcc.nhs.uk . Wellbeing Café Your local practice is focusing on wellness in more ways than ever before. The revamping of our Wellbeing Café provides a safe, John friendly space for people to get together and focus on their wellbeing. Whether you have been experiencing loneliness, low mood, or are living with a long-term condition, this hub is a positive place to be. Come along and speak with our Patient Services Manager, Lisa, and our Community Connector, Jan, who can discuss your needs, goals, and aims. Already, people have enjoyed painting and crafts, and there are upcoming programmes in photography and journaling amongst other activities. We also welcome the ideas of attendees and are keen and willing to bring your ideal activity to fruition. If you would like to get involved, please call the surgery and arrange to speak to Jan Forsyth, our community connector. Medical Experts We’re proud that our surgery offers a range of incredible medical experts, to ensure our patients receive the right care, from the right clinicians, at the right

Dave

time. This includes GPs, Nurses, Health Care Assistants, Clinical Pharmacists and First Contact


Physio Therapists such as John and Dave. (Pictured). First Contact Physios (FCPs) are highly skilled and experienced NHS Chartered Physiotherapists. They can complete a thorough physical assessment, prescribe exercise, suggest lifestyle changes and access medical investigations, or refer to other specialities such as orthopaedics or rheumatology, if deemed necessary. If you have recently suffered a joint, muscle or bone injury or sprain, you can book a face-to-face appointment with one of our FCPs on a Wednesday or Friday here at the surgery - much faster than the traditional route of booking a GP appointment and then being referred to the physiotherapy service. EDITOR’S NOTE: Whilst 13% is a good response to a survey and 1701 is a lot of people, bearing in mind the level of reaction we received to MPCC’s last article, it’s surprising that 87% didn’t take the opportunity to provide valuable feedback.

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Following the purchase of The Old Bell, new security is already in evidence in the cloister gardens.

A Disturbing Trend There continues to be a marked increase in both the amount and seriousness of the anti-social behaviour witnessed in Malmesbury this year. Below are some of issues we’ve been alerted to:

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Young person mugged in the Cloister Gardens Bicycle stolen from its owner in the Cloister Gardens, broken up and thrown in the river Solar garden lights stolen from front garden Scarecrows for the Carnival consistently damaged Defibrillator outside a school vandalised Children threatening and bullying other children at the play area in Filands, allegedly with a knife involved Plants and planters destroyed at a shop in the town centre Cricket club and pitch vandalised Burglary and anti-social behaviour at the Gloucester Road Co-op combined with the theft of a disability scooter

Damage to Cross Hayes toilets

Vandalism at the Tetbury Road Cemetery

Whilst we appreciate that tackling the reasons behind the problem may be a complex process (it’s certainly a slow one), it hasn't escaped our attention that Malmesbury Council Tax payers have been subjected to large year-on-year increases in


the Policing precept in their annual bills. Recent increases are: 2018/19 - 7%; 2019/20 13.9%; 2020/21 - 4.9%; 2021/22 - 6.9%, yet our Police Station is closed and police patrols in Malmesbury appear inadequate. Here are some recent quotes from the Malmesbury Police Facebook page. "During enquires it would appear young people may not always be telling the truth about where they are or who they’re with especially seeing as children as young as 14 were out at 05:00 this morning! If you do see young people out at unacceptable times and you feel uncomfortable with this, please if you know the parents let them know or alternately contact the Police and we will take action where necessary". Two points here; if the parents are letting their 14-year-olds roam the streets at 5 a.m. do the police really think they’ll give a monkey’s about where their child is? Also, what’s the police’s definition of “where necessary”? “PCSOs conducted mobile patrols this evening around Cricklade, Royal Wootton Bassett, Malmesbury and everywhere in between”. Couldn't have spent long anywhere, then. We’re questioning the system, not the officers. How long will the Council Tax payers of Malmesbury put up with paying more for less - let alone policing by Facebook? That makes it sound like they have a choice. Editor Snippet

Coming to Malmesbury Soon? Our planning updates are receiving an increasing amount of comment from our readers. What's happening at the moment? The main current and potential planning applications affecting Malmesbury are:

Backbridge – 201 new homes near Dyson, although this could possibly increase. This is on land designated in Malmesbury’s own Neighbourhood Plan. 26 self-build plots on land opposite Waitrose a previous application for a Lidl supermarket on this site was rejected. It is not in the Neighbourhood Plan. A Bloor Homes application for 70 more houses on Filands. This is in addition to the 70 homes yet to be built on the site for which approval has been granted. Bloor's application for removal from their commitment to allocate part of the Filands site for educational purposes is still under review. The result will, no doubt, determine how many more houses they intend to build on the site. If this succeeds, virtually all of the land along the B4014 at Filands will be developed (see map). None of which is in the Neighbourhood Plan. Burton Hill (behind what used to be our police station) – approval has been given for 27 dwellings with another 29 possibly in the pipeline for a site on the other side of the health centre. This location is in the Neighbourhood Plan.


50 residential units on land off Park Road - this is part of a site where planning has already been rejected and is not in the Neighbourhood Plan. The most recent application to build here was refused on 16th September but, at the time of writing, an appeal is still possible. Potentially, that’s over 400 new houses coming to Malmesbury soon. We make this point not through “NIMBYism”, but genuine concern that the town's infrastructure, already creaking in parts, will not withstand the influx of people and vehicles that such over-development will generate. As we’ve emphasized in previous issues, Malmesbury has already exceeded the number of new houses (either built or approved) required of it by 2036 in Wiltshire Council’s Housing Requirement plans. Is Wiltshire Council consistent in its decision making? Wiltshire Council has repeatedly ignored Malmesbury's Neighbourhood Plan and the views of residents when making planning decisions. As we’ve said before, changes to the National Planning Policy Framework and the lack of a 5-year supply of housing land have contributed significantly to their decision making. It’s interesting that plans to build 50 affordable homes in Pewsey were recently rejected by the council’s planning officers because "… the site was in the open countryside which would conflict with the local authority’s housing strategy

and the Pewsey neighbourhood plan." The Backbridge application excepted, all of the current planning proposals listed above conflict with Malmesbury's existing Neighbourhood Plan and all are in countryside areas. So, if Malmesbury has more than delivered on its house building commitments to 2036, why do we appear to be treated differently, especially at Filands? Wiltshire council's own Emerging Spatial Strategy review for Malmesbury, published earlier this year, states "At Malmesbury, given the modest scale of growth remaining to be planned for and the possibility to identify sites through a review of the neighbourhood plan, there may be no need to allocate further greenfield land". Please visit the Planning section of Wiltshire Council’s website for more details. Also, Malmesbury Neighbourhood Plan has been reviewed and comments are invited by 24th October - see Malmesbury Town Council website for details.

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Feeling Adventurous?

The plastic baggers are getting ever more inventive in disposing of their canine friends’ waste. A little part of me wishes the bag had split as this one was being pushed into the wall.

White Walls Way is a 20-mile circular walk, broken up into 7 stages, around the countryside and villages to the west of Malmesbury. It was developed by Malmesbury Area Pathfinders and is a great way to engage with nature and history in beautiful surroundings.

Andy, our editor, decided to complete the whole walk in one day and, if you’re interested, you can read his rambling account of the experience on The Malmesbury Jackdaw website.


End Of An Era And so, we say farewell to the Pollards who’ve been instrumental in increasing Malmesbury’s national and international profile over the years. Abbey House Gardens are splendid and the result of great imagination and hard work, but things seemed to really take off (pun fully intended) when the owners, having tried it themselves, decided that clothes would also be optional for visitors on designated days. This really put the spotlight on Malmesbury and there were other side effects. A reader recalls, “The river walk was never the same again and my octogenarian mother was severely traumatized after we took her for a stroll through Conygre Mead. The sight of something pink and wobbly like marshmallow, but definitely human, moving amongst the bushes as we admired the gardens through the wire fence had a profound effect on her. At one point, we thought she may have to be taught to blink again.”

It remains to be seen how the new owners’ plans for Abbey House will change things. If it is to become an hotel/wedding venue, what will this mean for the gardens? Will they become off limits to the general public? If they choose to keep the

gardens open and retain the current “freedoms”, timetabling will be key. To coincide a wedding with a “kit off” day could result in some interesting photos. Imagine, you’re enjoying leafing through

the wedding album and pause to look at a lovely family group shot and then … what the hell is that? In the distance by the roses … just to the left of granddad’s ear? But, after the predictable jokes, we’d genuinely like to thank the Pollards for the gardens and everything else they’ve done for Malmesbury. They’ve brought colour, energy and trade to the town and The Jackdaw wishes them the very best for the future. Yes, we know Abbey House is already a wedding venue. Editor


End Of An Era Gordon Williams reflects on Malmesbury’s closed banks.

Mr Jennings took cash out from "The Capital & Counties Bank" in 1888, it appears, and I reckon £5 went a long way in those days. His full name was Joseph Cave Spicer Jennings and he lived in Abbey House. An interesting chap, he was a surgeon, the union medical officer (which I take to be the Workhouse) and chairman of the Malmesbury Water Company. He was also deputy Registrar of Births and Deaths, so must have been a busy man indeed. It seems his passion was to ensure the town had clean drinking water from the springs on his premises.

"The Capital & Counties Bank" where Dr Jennings cashed his cheque was at 10 High Street; that tall, impressive red brick building which now houses an insurance brokerage. Way back when, Farmer Do you recall stepping into a handsome building of William Walker ran his bank there (but only for two Bath stone in the High Street to be greeted by, say, hours in the evening) then it changed name and Becky, Sue or Tina? You know, that balustraded, tall hands more than once until it was taken over by -windowed building that had a tiled floor, wooden Lloyds in 1918. It closed in 1924 - Lloyds had another branch in the town, so one had to go.

panel walls and a clock next to the safe door. And a counter to lean on as you paid in a cheque (using a pen on a chain), or the week's takings... before getting your cash for the week. But, if there was a queue, you used the "hole in the wall " instead. I'm talking about our now departed banks. Using a credit card is fine, but I miss the friendly conversation about my overdraft, that unpaid direct debit and, of course, the weather. The personal touch goes a long way and the service was on our doorstep, not in a faraway town. So, on the theme of "the old banks of Malmesbury", what do you make of the pictures of these used cheques?

The next cheque was handed over the counter at the "Wilts Dorset Banking Company Limited", now there's an impressive name for a financial institution! This bank ended its working life as Lloyds TSB, after being launched around


1840 by local bigwigs and businessmen. It also had many changes of name (and a rebuild in 1924). As well as being the first to open in the town, it was the last to close, if we discount the mobile bank that graces our town routinely.

Charlton House. Again, £15 seems a healthy quantity of cash for 1905, but perhaps it was used to pay staff wages or day-to-day bills, presuming fewer people had bank accounts in those days.

Take a closer look at the name on the cheque from 2nd. October 1905. Victoria M. Howard could have signed it as Lady Victoria Margaret Louisa Howard, her full title, as her father was the Earl of Suffolk. I don't suppose there was enough space to write all those names! Even the Another bank was the smart Midland which ran aristocracy, it appears, would have ridden into town from 1921 and is now a fine coffee house (other to access their accounts; no cash point in the wall of excellent places of refreshment are available in town). Do you, like my family, refer to it as "the Bank"? Is it still possible to make out Midland HSBC in the stonework? Finally, there was Barclays which came to town in 1959, so no interesting, traditional building to write about here, then. If you want to find out more about the history of our departed banks, go to Charles Vernon's "yellow books" available in the Town Hall. Now, I must go and do some online banking, if I can remember my password, memorable phrase and account number.



Open Letter From The Carnival Committee

Dear All, We write on behalf of the Officers and Members of this year’s Carnival Committee to formally ‘Thank You’ for your continued support of Malmesbury Carnival and Festival. Without your interest, enthusiasm and willingness to get involved, 2021 would not have had such a successful outcome. So many of you came forward to offer your skills, abilities, talents and experience without asking anything in return other than to be part of this wonderful town’s activities. As a result of such generosity, despite the very particular constraints of this year, Carnival was able to provide many different experiences in addition to those well-established events such as Petticoat Lane, Open Gardens and Music in the Cloisters. Sadly, we were not able to go ahead with the Procession this year, but we’re sure that all our local organizations, clubs and pubs will be ‘up for it’ in 2021. So, if you were one of those people who hosted an event for Carnival or provided entertainment at an event or who organized groups of other volunteers to support any of the events throughout August, please accept the committee's grateful thanks - Carnival could not happen without you. In addition, the Committee is very grateful for the high level of financial and logistical support from across the spectrum of Malmesbury businesses; we were delighted to retain those that have sponsored Carnival for years, and to welcome new sponsors. Local businesses also donated all prizes for the raffle, so Carnival 2021 benefited enormously from your support. You will be pleased to know that through everyone’s generosity, the Carnival Charity will have £17,000 to donate to local charities and voluntary organizations. The deadline for applications from the local community was September 30th. We were blessed with wonderful weather and massive support. We very much hope to be at least as successful next year and to bring back a bigger and better Procession. Roll on 2022! Thank you all once again. Paul Overton and Mike Harding (Co Chairs)



CARNIVAL 2021


Royal Visit Our palace reporter, Cromwell Oliver, remembers a royal occasion in Malmesbury nearly 20 years ago. On Friday 7th December 2001, the Queen and the late Prince Philip paid a rescheduled visit to North Wiltshire.

They arrived on time at Chippenham station at 10.58 a.m. (off-peak), courtesy of GWR. I hope they managed to get seats for the whole journey. Their itinerary comprised visits to Calne, Chippenham and Malmesbury (leaving the best until last) with the journeys between the towns being completed in a Bentley bearing the Royal Standard; although it’s not immediately clear how they managed to get that on the train.

with cheering onlookers including groups of freshly washed and ironed children waving paper Union Jacks and proffering posies. A large entourage followed the royals as they were escorted on their way by the Lord Lieutenant of Wiltshire, Sir Maurice Having survived the rigours of Calne and Johnston and the Mayor of Malmesbury, the late Chippenham, the royal couple arrived in John Bowen. Amongst the followers were members Malmesbury at 1.15 p.m. for a reception and of the Town Council, more people in new suits and presentations at the Town Hall after which they went for a walk along Oxford Street, heading for the dresses, some very handy looking security men and Abbey. It wasn’t a quiet stroll as the route was lined the (then) ubiquitous Gyles Brandreth, who was making a documentary. The Queen wore a reddish pink coat and quite a nice hat (remind me to make you our fashion correspondent. Editor) whilst Prince Philip sported a dark morning suit and silk tie which definitely didn’t come from M&S. They were completely eclipsed by John Bowen in his mayoral garb. Both looked relaxed; chatting happily to locals as they walked – impressive, really, considering that Malmesbury was their third engagement of the day. On


arriving at the Abbey, they attended a short service conducted by Rev. David Littlefair and were presented with an engraved paperweight and a painting. Afterwards, laden with gifts and flowers, they headed up Tetbury Hill to Dyson where the eponymous inventor showed them round the factory, aided by company director and former North Wiltshire MP, Richard Needham. Before leaving, they were presented with more flowers and a bagless vacuum cleaner. Five years later, James Dyson’s CBE was upgraded to a knighthood … the vacuum cleaner was obviously still working. Having decided not to use their time in the West to pop over the county border to surprise Charles and Anne, the royal couple returned to Chippenham station for the journey back to London. With all those gifts, flowers and a Bentley to load on to the train, I hope there wasn’t a replacement bus service in operation.

I’ll leave the summary to my younger daughter, who was of primary school age at the time, and commented, “It was nice that everybody was so happy, but the Queen was too small. From where I was standing, I could only see her hat”. I sometimes wonder if you’re the right person to report on the Royal Family, Cromwell. Editor


The Old School Yard We came across this photo that the previous editor, Dave Witt, passed to us when we took over The Malmesbury Jackdaw. It was sent to Dave by Sharon Hamilton (née Trimble) – please let us know if you want the photo back, Sharon. Sharon said, “Just in case you’re interested, Mr. Bissett’s class was upstairs in the old Cartmell Centre and the canteen/kitchen and toilets were downstairs. Oh, how we hated the smell of cabbage, but what a treat to have bricks and cement (chocolate cake with chocolate custard). Also, in those days, we looked forward to summer when, at break time, we had a lovely bottle of warm curdled milk. Yuk!” We’ve listed the names as remembered by Sharon. Back: ?, Debbie Mitchell, Diane Liddington, Christine Wilson, Viv Sanders, Julie Exton, Corrine Powers, Judith Webb, ? Middle: Gary Avis, Robert Evans, ? Powers, Debra Waine, Sharon Trimble, Danny Bailey, ?, David White, Jonathan Pike, Peter Wood, ? Front: Astrid Miles?, Christine Holloway, Paul Neal, Paul Cox, ?, Mr Bissett, Lyn Maundrell, Allan Ritchings, Shaun Sutton, Martin Warn, ?


A Message From Julie Exton and Ben Thornbury After last year’s huge success, we’ve decided to do it Christmas Pom Pom making, again. light display Malmesbury Halloween Trail 2021 planning, A three-day SPOOKY recycle those TRAIL over the halfscarecrows term school holidays again and dress them up in Christmas costumes. from Friday 29th Start making those decorations and decorate your October to Sunday windows, doors, gardens etc. from a coloured 31st October. picture to a light display that Blackpool would be happy with. Add your address to the trail by going to the website which has lots of ideas to get you started. www.halloweenmalmesbury.weebly.com or contact Julie on 07595 725263. Malmesbury & Villages Light up for Christmas 2021 The light up will start at 6pm on 1st December and will run until 1st January.

Go to the website and fill out the form to go on the map. Start making your decorations bigger and better than last year. w.malmesburyandvillages.weebly.com or contact Julie on 07595 725263. Follow the progress on Our Malmesbury on Facebook and post your photos or send them to Julie on the above number.


Test Your Local and General Knowledge After the postponement of the mayor’s Big Fat Malmesbury Quiz, here’s our little skinny one. 1. Which Malmesbury born footballer played nearly 250 games for Oxford United? 2. In which European city is the Little Mermaid statue? 3. Which party does U.S. president Joe Biden represent? 4. How many steps are there in John Buchan’s 1915 novel? 5. Which of these are prime numbers? 111; 173; 269; 301 6. UNVEIL BRA is an anagram of which Malmesbury road? 7. On what date did Elizabeth II succeed her father, George VI? 8. What would your star sign be if you were born on 15th October? 9. On average, how many miles is the Moon from Earth? 10. Which night of the week did Elton John proclaim to be “Alright for Fighting”? 11. Which chemical element is represented by the symbol K? 12. Which English city was stripped of its UNESCO World Heritage status in July this year? 13. What is the name mathematician and scientist who appears on the new £50 note? 14. Malmesbury’s Market Cross is thought to have been built in which century? 15. Who is the current Mayor of Malmesbury? Answers on our website: www.themalmesburyjackdaw.co.uk


Malmesbury Past By Bill Reed The last Jackdaw contained a photograph of the 1962 reenactment of Elmer’s flight, and as the story forms part of the “Malmesbury Voices” collection, I can add some detail.

Joe Nolan of Triangle Studio took the photo printed by the Gazette and Herald. Another he took, shown here, is a slightly better one in my opinion as it shows all the faces. It has the number 12 in his writing in the top left corner (to keep that corner white he would have held his thumb over it while exposing the paper under the enlarger) and his stamp on the back. On this

I found the typescript of this scenario when going through some of the papers Bob Browning had collected, and with Richard Maslen’s agreement I made a new audio recording with members of Athelstan Players. Along with Richard’s memories of the event, this recording is on the “Malmesbury Voices” screen in Athelstan Museum. It brings the whole re-enactment story back to life. Another re-enactment took place in 1976, and the “Voices” collection contains an account of it by Norman Clark. I would be very interested to hear from anyone who saw or took part in this event. Joe Nolan set up in business as a photographer at 64 Abbey Row in 1959, after retiring from the RAF. He took many portraits and wedding photographs

photograph I have added the names of those who took part. The scheme was dreamt up by Jim Gilmore and Richard Maslen, both of them local newspaper journalists, along with engineer Max Woosnam. They obtained permission from Rev. Arthur Beaghen at the Abbey. The RAF agreed to take part as a “training exercise”. Jim and Richard wrote a scenario for the event, enlisted Athelstan Players to perform it, and arranged music and lighting.


for local families, helped on occasion by his wife Betty and daughters Sharon and Siobhan. Some readers may remember the sign hanging from the porch of the house, the proofs posted in the porch, and the studio and darkroom downstairs - the lettering inside the house was painted by Siobhan.

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Thought for the Day "A good example has twice the value of good advice." Albert Schweitzer

CLUE: The Mini is facing the correct way. Diolch, Dafydd!


Tiger Attack!

Hannah: No! I want a big stripy cat like the one they’re showing at the back of the pub where I work. Old Mrs Twynnoy: A big stripy cat? Whatever next? What do Other than the manner of her demise, very little is known about Hannah who they eat anyway? Hannah: Yes, that’s what I want. I’m off to work now. I’ll make is interred in the Abbey grounds. The sure I find out what they eat this afternoon. Bashful Bard has managed to find old records of a conversation that might The White Lion Inn, Gloucester Street, Malmesbury. Just before shed some light on the matter. Pointless. Landlord: Where’s all the cheese gone? I need to make some more crusty baps. Hannah (looking sheepish): Er, I’ve no idea. I’m just nipping out the back to see the animals in the exhibition again. Landlord: Be careful, Hannah. The keeper keeps telling you to stop teasing the tiger. It’s very fierce. Hannah: Nah! It’s just a big pussycat. Here kitty, kitty! Three minutes later. Landlord: Hell’s teeth! Where did that that roar come from and what was that scream? The keeper (rushing in): It’s Hannah, the tiger’s only gone and eaten her. I told her it didn’t like cheese! One hour later, back at the house. Landlord: I’m sorry Mrs Twynnoy. The keeper said it was quick. WANTED Hannah wouldn’t have felt a thing. The kitchen in a house in or near rd Old Mrs Twynnoy: Oh well, at least she found out what tigers Malmesbury: October 23 1703. Just really like to eat before she passed on. It’s a shame it ate her before Bargain Hunt. Hannah: It’s late October, when do we shoes as well, I quite fancied those. What’s left of her will now rest in a bed of clay until the resurrection day. Your never know, put the clocks back, mum? they might even name a road after her on the Reeds Farm Old Mrs Twynnoy: The Summer Times Estate. Act won’t come into force until halfway through the First World War so you can Landlord: What’s the Reeds Farm Estate………? forget your fancy ideas about putting clocks backwards and forwards, my girl. Hannah: When’s the First World War due then? Old Mrs Twynnoy: No idea. Political alliances and tensions across Europe and the Balkans will decide that. Hannah (looking thoroughly bored): Can I have a pet? Old Mrs Twynnoy: What? You’re 33 years old; you should be looking for more than a pet. What sort do you want anyway? Hannah: A cat. A great big cat. There’s one at the White Lion. Old Mrs Twynnoy: You want a white lion?


Local Musician, Chris Gibbon In the March Jackdaw, we featured local musician Chris Gibson (A Gibbon Called Chris) and his album on Bandcamp, ‘Going to Mars’. He’s back again with some new music - this time as one half of ‘Ribman & Gibbon’. Ribman is Steve James, the keyboardist with established Salisbury-based functions band ‘Firestar’. In the past, Steve often drove a ‘RIB’ type boat, which is where the name Ribman comes from. He’s collaborated with Chris to produce an album of varied tunes called ‘What Does This Button Do?’. The title is a reference to the synthesizers (which feature prominently in their music) having so many knobs and controls with which the player needs to be familiar to produce all the varied tones. The tracks reflect a number of different styles of contemporary music. After the first big ‘build up’ track there are some ‘trancey’ dance-style tracks and one derived from Middle Eastern-type audio samples. There’s also an 80’s-style instrumental that will soon be released as a song with vocals. Other tracks are based on pleasantly listenable melodies, but there is one on which they really let loose. It’s a 70’s style New York Cops theme with lots of noisy fuzz/wah guitar, moog synth, brass and police sirens! Ribman & Gibbon intend to carry on writing and producing more tunes and will be converting their current playlist into a live set. They’ll be available to play their music live at local festivals and events in 2022. If you’re interested, they can be contacted through their Bandcamp page or on Instagram; in each case, either as ‘Ribman & Gibbon’ or ‘A Gibbon Called Chris’. If you’re looking for a great functions band, Steve’s ‘Firestar’ is available for bookings. Please see www.firestarinfo.co.uk for contact details. ‘What Does This Button Do?’ can be found on most streaming services such as Spotify, Apple Music, Deezer, You Tube and Bandcamp. We love the pottery heads on the album cover. They were created by Chris’s wife, Heather - she made the vase on the left, too. Editor


Exercise and Chat As friends we used to meet regularly to run and chat; it was a simple pleasure. RunTalkRun gave us the inspiration and support to share the benefits of talking, being outdoors and being physically active. We all understand that being active can positively impact our health, but we tend to overlook how connecting with others and being outside can benefit our emotional health. RunTalkRun is a national charity that combines movement, people and the great outdoors to get us working together, as a community. We meet on a Monday at 6.50 p.m. in the long stay carpark for a 5km run around our wonderful town, laughing, chatting and sharing our stories. This gives us all the opportunity to notice the small things and reconnect with what’s important – being in the moment and finding joy in the everyday. How many people attend? We’re still growing but, to date, we have a core of four of us who meet every week - come rain or shine - and four others who fit it in around work/family. How fast do you run? You simply run at your pace. How do I get started? You can find us on our app: Mycrew, or you can turn up and say “hi”. How will I feel after? Here are some words we hear frequently: lighter, new perspective, fun, happier, kindness, welcoming and see you next week!


And Finally

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ACROSS 0 0 0 0 7...A typical example could 10 0 0 0 be a mad prig (8) 9...Sounds like clothing 0 0 0 0 could be made of rubber (6) 12 0 0 13 10...Role changed by tradition (4) 0 0 0 0 11...Canned sixteenths. Part 0 15 0 0 of your five-a-day? (6,4) 12...Are not changed, close 0 0 0 0 by (4,2) 0 14...Slip after a pass leads to 20 21 0 total failure (8) 0 0 0 0 15...A fool who clings on? (6) 23 0 0 0 17...Fixed, but it sounds like there were casualties (6) 0 0 0 0 20...Best in the ocean? (8) 25 0 0 0 22...A test of the heart? (6) 0 0 0 0 23...Food that could be a niche salad (10) 24...Cut down the PM? Initially, Boris on job often (2,2) 25...A small drink goes to one's head (6) 26...Weak torch for overcast conditions? (3,5)

DOWN 1...Titled lady one's seen in watering holes (8) 2...Sounds like a fair destiny (4) 3...Cafe where an inventor smothers a good man (6) 4...Heliophobic Tory? (4,4) 5...Climbed this as the adder slept (10) 6...Do these produce groans? (6) 8...Intimidate a pest (6) 13...Best fix on a hot day? (6,4) 16...Leave country road this way? (4,4) 18...Start of bad news? (4,4) 19...Dad? He's changing out of the sun (6) 21...Poorly led to a cheap cooking vessel (6) 22...Suppose you can change an endless rubber (6) 24...Is Ekland a short islander? (4)


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