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BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS
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Brunch Opinion
LOG ON TO LAUGH
“How Funny Are You?” If Indian Internet were to take this Buzzfeed quiz, the result would be “Wow, you are getting good” – and a dog with painted eyebrows next to it. Now, there are at least two popular Indian versions of Buzzfeed (Storypick and ScoopWhoop), hilarious indigenous meme trends 2012, ISSUE 1 (Ab Ki Baar, Sanskari The ROFL issue: Babuji), ubiquitous stand-up comics Bollywood and dig on celebrities TV-show-based GIFs and punchy, political parody videos. Earlier, online humour was confined to relentless tweets, a funny picture here, a comical video there – 2014 is clearly the year funny hit puberty in India. And despite its awkward stage, we couldn’t choose any other subject for our third annual issue on humour. Our first humour special in 2012, The ROFL Issue, featured standup comics (you saw them all here first, btw) poking fun at celebrities. For the Comics Special in 2013, we got the country’s most popular
On The Brunch Radar
by Yashica Dutt
by Saudamini Jain
graphic artists to draw exclusively for us. Up until now, we were content with borrowed Nicolas Cage memes and US TV show GIFs, this year saw an explosion of local content. There are Indian versions of popular lists (eg: 10 Things Indian Girls are Tired of Hearing) and videos (the side-splitting video spoofs on Arvind Kejriwal and Rahul Gandhi changed the election entirely, turning the great Indian circus into an online reality show.) Everyone was suddenly funny – even on Twitter timelines and Facebook newsfeeds. Witty repartee, punchy memes and reaction GIFs exploded on social media. The Internet gave us the funnies and the feels. Even chats bristled with funny stickers instead of regular responses. And when a troubled, moonfaced emoji expresses your particular state of gaucherie best, who needs them words anyway? So, go ahead and devour our funny pieces on online humour. And before you Facebook, tweet, comment about it, yes, we fully understand the irony of presenting it to you in print. 2013, ISSUE 2 Graphic artists on how to survive the city
About our cover artist: Akshar Pathak, an artist and a graphic designer, is the man behind the fun Facebook page Minimal Bollywood Posters. In Case You Are Wondering What Our Cover’s About It’s about the Internet. And its neologisms. In order of appearance LOL: Laugh Out Loud, ROFL: Rolling On The Floor Laughing, LMAO: Laughing My A*s Off, BRB: Be Right Back, TTYL: Talk To You Later, YOLO: You Only Live Once, OMG: Oh My God, Ctrl+C: Copy, Ctrl+V: Paste
Ab Tak Aapne Dekha
LOVE IT
n Dowrycalculator.com. It’s important to know your exe’s value is next to nothing. Burn! n A World Bank study revealed that most pdfs are left buried unread n When Alok Nath calls you (turn to the back page) n Blooming gulmohar trees everywhere n Monica Lewinsky’s first-person account in Vanity Fair
n People who use Two States as an example in the book-better-than-film argument n When a part of your job is to respond politely to grammatically challenged people on Twitter and email n Successful twentysomethings n Restaurants passing off Capsico as Tabasco n Surveys like this: “Delhi’s men make for more confident lovers than Mumbai counterparts,” reveals an AXE survey
We’re tired of these often misleading, mostly ridiculous headlines that clog our Twitter and Facebook timelines. Here are the worst offenders. And remember, as tempted as you are to click on them, don’t!
IF IT READS: No Sexual Desire? No Problem! IT USUALLY MEANS: You’ve clicked on an ad intended for uncles who have no insurance and need fake Viagra 3578 PEOPLE VIEWING
IF IT READS: The 1st Story Made Me Smile, The 2nd Made Me Happy, But The 3rd I Can’t Stop Thinking About IT USUALLY MEANS: You are loser enough to read these borderline-lame articles
Premise: The X-Men send back Wolverine to the past in order to prevent an all-out war. A new nemesis has necessitated the formation of a united team of younger X-Men and present-day older X-Men. The movie apparently has a large role for Trask Industries and Sentinels. (For the uninitiated: Sentinels are giant mutant-killing robots developed by Bolivar Trask played by the recent Game of Thrones sensation, Peter Dinklage) THINGS TO BE EXCITED ABOUT: THE CAST Two Professors (James McAvoy and Patrick Stewart) and two Magnetos (Ian McKellen and Michael Fassbender), young and old. All reprising their roles Oscar winner Anna Paquin will be playing Rogue again
Queen of the cyber perverts Jennifer Lawrence will once again essay the inimitable (pun intended) role of Mystique
And, of course, Hugh Jackman as the Wolverine
EDITORIAL: Poonam Saxena (Editor), Aasheesh Sharma, Rachel Lopez, Tavishi Paitandy Rastogi, Veenu Singh, Parul Khanna, Yashica Dutt, Amrah Ashraf, Satarupa Paul, Saudamini Jain
MAY 18, 2014
Watch it in 3D: The trailers are full of cheese-burst dialogue and dramatic string music. So it looks like an IMAX 3D experience might be worth a watch. If you have some time to kill: Log on to Trask-industries. com. It is complete with mechanical specifications for the Sentinels, a profile of Bolivar and cataloguing of anti-mutant products.
DESIGN: Ashutosh Sapru (National Editor, Design), Monica Gupta, Swati Chakrabarti, Payal Dighe Karkhanis, Rakesh Kumar, Ajay Aggarwal
IT USUALLY MEANS: The site has paraphrased someone else’s research 2567 PEOPLE VIEWING
IF IT READS: 19 Signs You Are Too Nice To Catch A Match Online IT USUALLY MEANS: You’re going to stay single if you don’t go out into the real world and find real love 1695 PEOPLE VIEWING
IF IT READS: One Trick To Flat Abs That Doctors Don’t Want You To Know IT USUALLY MEANS: It involves using your credit card to pay for advice about crunches and breathing 6895 PEOPLE VIEWING
IF IT READS: This Stunning Video Of A Solar Flare Shows Just How Incredibly Hot It Actually Is
IF IT READS: Could You Be Straight? Here’s 11 Science Facts About It To Help You Check. IT USUALLY MEANS: You’ll be more confused than before 1497 PEOPLE VIEWING
IF IT READS: Your IQ Level Will Skyrocket Once You Read This
IT USUALLY MEANS: You’ll be looking at a photo of a big orange ball in your air-conditioned home/office/car
IT USUALLY MEANS: It won’t, dummy! IQ is something you’re born with. You can only improve knowledge, not intelligence
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1505 PEOPLE VIEWING
Stuff You Said Last Sunday reader loyal Brunch I have been a I always found it d since 2005 an ious issues w of the prev charming (fe und the fo I . n) io pt being an exce t provoking. For a ough cover story th Goswami’s column a change, Seem Saumya Sharma l– was cheerfu Loved the literature fes t at Dubai article. Great description of Al Bastakiya. – Thank You Saudamini –@sop hidhamani akes my m ch un Br @HT Wonderful co r! Today’s ve Sundays bette of the movie review r story about e on s and review s wa on editi by @ kHT ea Br unch today. En ers and Br joyed best till date viewpoints of s’ pg was on @anupamac pi am Ch hofast of pra and @Ra eit - @ ov #l je :D ev us M as rio and hila - @BoL_BLoG ta GeR Krishita_meh
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Photos: SHUTTERSTOCK
The recently out-of-the-closet Ellen Page plays Shadowcat, aka Kitty Pryde. Shadowcat can pass through solid matter. <Insert SCAT joke here>. In the comic book series, it is Kitty Pryde who is sent back to prevent the war
If you’ve watched all the previous films in the series, watch this one closely: Since it incorporates an element of time-travel we can be sure that it will be full of Easter Eggs referring to both past movies and (possible) upcoming ones.
IF IT READS: Here’s The Dirty Secret Behind How Your Favourite Brand Gets It Right/ Cheap/On Time
1987 PEOPLE VIEWING
by Shantanu Argal
The new X-Men Movie (X-Men: Days of Future Past) is scheduled to release on May 23. The film is inspired by the 1980 comic series of the same name.
by Apekshita Varshney
WEB HEADLINES THAT NEED TO DIE
SHOVE IT
All You Need To Know About The New X-Men Movie
Cover illustration: AKSHAR PATHAK
Yeh Kya Bakwaas Hai?