Page 1

The Wrangler May 2013 Edition Roman Numeral Twenty-Six

News in Briefs


ra in

ha r



ha n1


Real. Comfortable. News.

Looking backward

Confusion erupts as Kim Jong-un attempts to enlist in Red Army

Prom theme overplayed; many lose hearts, brains, courage and rides home

Students amazed by Tupac hologram performance at Brochella

Phoenix Zoo to rampup security after hearing reports of possible Bring Your Pet to Piper Day

Seniors of the Class of 2014 to gain an additional week of school. Members cite the need to be trendy

Timeline By Jeff Bennett ’13

Senior shenanigry Article By Austin Tymins ’13 and Steven Soto ’13

After months of shenanigry, Seniors are stepping up their game and are preparing for an epic prank that should live on in Brophy history. The senior prank, which is run through the prestigious ‘Prank Committee’, is a time-honored tradition. The Prank Committee’s recommendations, which are of course subject to approval from Dean Higgins, have just been released to the seniors.

remain anonymous, though they usually are fairly obvious. For example, one of the pranks which is assumed to be from Dean Higgins is simply “Pick up trash around campus.”

Seniors are allowed to vote on pranks, and the results have been astounding. One of the leading pranks is to release a gator on Xavier campus with 109 votes. Most students also voted to sustain ‘Frat Day’ for Faculty members are al- the rest of the year. lowed to suggest pranks Other pranks suggested to the Committee as are to cement Brophy well. These suggested golf carts to the ground pranks are supposed to

in the Octogan (71 votes), pile all senior tablets into the Mums fountain (64 votes), and to draw “I love doody” all over campus (unanimous 311 votes). Brophy’s secret society system has also been abuzz recently with talks of pranks. The Black Key Society annually kidnaps one freshman after the school year has ended. Most freshmen end up at Saint Mary’s sophomore year after being kidnapped over the summer. Whatever the future holds, I’m sure that the Class of 2013 will not disappoint.

Cartoon By Ryan Theisen ’13

Boy, Have We Changed!

Photo Illustrations By Steven Soto ’13, Mark Nageotte ’13, and Alexander Khan ’13 Printed on recycled Roundups

The Flip Side

Senior “Mosts” Photos by Kyle Chalmers ’13


Likely to Take Mr. Reithmann's Job


Matt Partee - Mister Book - Thomas Reithmann VI

Flanders McHunkle - Carlos Sanchez - Chucky Dunkbuddy

Likely to have Worst Attendance

Likely to Receive Candy and Money in a Few Seconds

Peter J. Smith - Zygbragaw Hublegumit - LaMichael DeJones


Chen Lee - Ned Grossberger - Puff Daddy (supplier of course)

Likely to Actually Be In Charge of The Wrangler

Sunless Nash - Warners Gone—Lonely Coyote

Calvin Terrell - Yahweh - Mr. Kitty Editors Austin Tymins ’13 Steven Soto ’13 Kyle Chalmers ’13 Jeff Bennett ’13 Alexander Khan ’13 Mark Nageotte ’13 Contributors Ryan Theisen ’13

Moderators Mr. John Damaso ’97 Mr. Steve Smith ’96 Special Thanks to Honorary Wrangler Staff Member Ms. Kucharski

The Wrangler is seeking student writers and contributors. Interested? Email: A.M.D.G. The Wrangler © 2013

Mission Statement: The Wrangler is satirical, k? All butts of jokes are willing. We have proof.

The Wrangler, No. 26  
The Wrangler, No. 26  

The satire newspaper by students of Brophy College Preparatory in Phoenix, AZ, USA.