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Brogue Magazine is the official Magazine for Brighton Arts Club. To order a high quality limited edition collectors copy please go to: BROGUE BOOKSHOP Useful links: The Brogue Blog Brogue on Facebook Brighton Arts Club Brighton Arts Club on Facebook Submissions Editor-In-Chief Spirit de la Mare on facebook Spirit de la Mare Fanpage Spirit de la Mare on Twitter Instagram: spiritdelamare Arts Director Pasha du Valentine on Facebook Pasha du Valentine on Twitter

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CONTENTS 8-9...........................................Editor’s Letter 12............................................Where’s Wooly 14-15 .......................................Vels Trio 16-17........................................Beta Rockers 18............................................Dojo 22............................................Featured Poets 50............................................BAC Artists 60............................................Creators of Cult 75............................................Open Mic 77............................................Comic 86............................................Agony 88............................................BAC photos 92............................................Members Brighton Arts Club 43 Providence Place Brighton BN1 4GE 01273 757714 www.brightonartsclub.blogspot.com

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Handmade quilt by Pasha du Valentine

BROGUE

Brogue Magazine Book one, Issue One, January 18th 2014 Brogue Magazine is the official magazine for Brighton Arts Club Editor-In-Chief: Spirit de la Mare Š Spirit de la Mare and Goddamn Media Published by Goddamn Media 2014 Revised Edition 4


Illustration by Jamie Blackett

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Background check: Karen Withecomb Q: At what point did you start writing poetry and why? A: I started writing in earnest at about 17 years old as I liked the discipline of form, rhythm and brevity that poetry imposed on painting the best picture of any given subject

Q: When did you start to perform your poetry and how did you find the transition from the page to the stage? A: I started performing poetry about three years ago. I found that the poems that work with silent reading do not always work as well in performance and vice versa, and that delivery is important. There is nothing wrong with being a non-performing poet, but don't perform if you are not prepared to work on your delivery in order to entertain an audience.

Q: You have been involved in the Brighton Arts Club open mic for the past year, do you feel your involvement has influenced your writing? A: Brighton Open Mic has been an excellent tool for maintaining a steady output of creative work, as every week a word has been suggested as 'homework,' around which each member would write a poem. Open Mic performers and their varied styles have also inspired me to try out new forms and step outside my comfort zone in terms of style and subject matter.

Q: Your approach to form tends to drift towards free verse, what is your opinion to more structured composition. A: I enjoy being challenged in terms of exploring new styles and I like the idea of writing within the discipline of certain rhythms and conventions. Although I tend towards free verse, I believe that writing within a given structure can improve writing generally and can be a good learning experience. It is also a good check and balance on lazy writing.

Q:As an established writer and performer what do you aim to achieve in the future? At present, I want to concentrate on prose and in particular, novel writing. My aim would be to be published commercially. I would also like to be able to continue to perform poetry and I will no doubt keep writing poetry as I find it almost impossible to stop.

Illustration by Spirit de la Mare 6


Illustration by Spirit de la Mare 7


BROGUE MAGAZINE EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Spirit de la Mare Former scholar and previous co-editor of the Old Roedeanians’ alumni magazine; published poet, writer, concert pianist and television presenter. Spirit is the general that heads the Brogue army and helps run B.A.C. ARTS EDITOR Pasha du Valentine Owner and founder of Brighton Arts Club, artist, photographer and film maker; published writer, mother of four and now surrogate mother of the Brighton Arts Club family. POETRY CO-ORDINATOR Joel Boardman Contributor and poet in residence at Brighton Arts Club; compère of the Brighton Arts Club open mic night from day one. A member of the club since conception.

PHOTOGRAPHER Amelia Thomas Student, photographer, and proud Brightonian; also Brighton Arts Club’s official events photographer. A woman quite happy to stand up on a bus full of people and tell a racist homophobe to “shut the fuck up”.

ILLUSTRATOR Jamie Blackett With roots in journalism and photography Jamie adorns Brogue’s pages with his unusual illustrations. He is also responsible for the poster art for Vels Trio and future posters for Dubconscious Sound System. Jamieblackett.co.uk

For enquiries and submissions please contact spiritdelamareforbrogue@gmail.com 8


FEATURING

Ste Su vieZ ici de

S MOMU

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S TE PH E N SI NGL ETO N

ERS K C RO

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Brogue Magazine is the official magazine for Brighton Arts Club. Within these pages we explore what happens here and meet our members to discuss their work. Brighton Arts Club is tucked away somewhere between a church, a tattoo studio and an abundance of graffiti. It is overshadowed by the church, only physically but not emotionally. The unassuming exterior gives way to a stunning and eclectic interior with a music venue, art studios, exhibition space and recording facilities. Brogue Magazine and Goddamn Media also run their empires from behind the metal gates. Brighton Arts Club was founded by Pasha du Valentine just over a year ago and its rapid growth is an indication of the value of such a project within the city of Brighton. Brighton Arts Club is fast becoming a hub of not only artistic but literary talent, with a special focus on poetry and spoken word. Spawned from a need to record all our activities Brogue was created and here in this first issue we hope to expose some of the talent that has been drawn to the club. Spirit de la Mare Editor-in-Chief

Spirit de la Mare rehearsing at Brighton Arts Club 10


Illustration by Jamie Blackett

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SPIRIT DE LA MARE

EDITOR’S LETTER

Three years ago I was virtually washed up on an East London street with no direction having been pushed and pulled by a tide of unfortunate events and probably a few to many brushes with the law. I wrote every day but most of it was self indulgent crap wallowing in my misfortune. I had a back log of disastrous relationships, friends that had let me down, no contact with my family and a CV that couldn't have got me a job washing dishes. The scholar I had been as a youngster had successfully rebelled to such a point that even I no longer believed in her. The concert pianist I once was had numb fingers and I was exhausted from all the running away I had been doing, mostly from myself. One day, with the help of an old friend I left London with only a car full of things and never looked back. I spent my teenage years in Brighton and on returning here it was as though I had never fucked up in the first place and I got my chance to start again. I re-built broken relationships, got a house and slowly but surely started to remember who I was. (None of which was even remotely easy). I remember vividly the day I walked into Brighton Arts Club and for the first time in twelve years felt like I could breathe. I bust my gut trying to prove to those I cared about most that I wasn't the hell raising lost soul I had been and that I meant business. I set up Brogue magazine to show the world what I saw at Brighton Arts Club. Opportunity, safety, freedom and above all acceptance. No one here cared that I had been arrested more times than I could count or that I owed several banks thousands of pounds; no one cared that I had won everything and then so dramatically lost it; no one cared about the person I had been before I walked through those doors. Within this issue I have incorporated everyone that has helped me rebuild a scattered existence into something worth watching, all those that continue to inspire me on a daily basis and the people that have become my family. The talent I am surrounded by keeps me on my toes and the support I receive is reassuring enough that I feel free to explore all manner of creative ideas. Anything goes. I hope I have done you all justice and to all the Brightonians out there...thanks for having me back. Spirit de la Mare. Editor-In-Chief

After working as a TV presenter for loaded TV Spirit now runs Brighton Arts Club together with Pasha du Valentine, is the editor-in-chief of Brogue magazine, plays the piano, writes poetry and paints. The Brighton Arts Club TV channel is on it ’ s way and she is penning her first novel. I think its safe to say she got her swagger back. 12


Photographs: ŠGoddamn Media/Pasha du Valentine. Spirit de la Mare. Styled by Charles of London (BAC)

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JOEL BOARDMAN Q: As one of Brighton Arts Clubs poets in residence and the eccentric compère of the open mic. night you come into contact with many up and coming poets, how does this interaction effect your work? A: I have hosted the open mic night at Brighton Arts Club for little over a year now and on numerous occasions I have been overjoyed, speechless and emotionally moved upon hearing some of the work from Brighton’s up and coming poets and musicians. Inevitably I have been inspired by their art and I believe that I have grown as a poet, and the quality of my writing has improved dramatically. Being encouraged to collaborate and produce new work every week has ensured my continual development as a writer.

Q: As a Brightonian, do you feel as though the city enriches your writing? A: In short, yes. Although I am not Brighton born and bred, Brighton is my home and there is no other place I would rather live. Brighton has been an inspiration to me for most of my life, the excitement and the freedom that the city boasts not to mention its coastal beauty is an obvious inspiration. My poetry certainly explores all Brighton has to offer. I am inspired most by the small details that most people, especially visitors ignore. Such as the old rotting benches caked in seagull droppings the daily grind of the working classes as they go about their day, the council estates and the winter. All of these observations enrich my poetry and I regularly write odes to these “underground” elements of Brighton.

Q: As a predominantly observational poet do you feel the need to use your poetry as a platform in which to raise local issues. A:Yes, sometimes. I am inspired by my senses and the emotions they trigger. It is this that I explore extensively within my work. Occasionally there may be a local issue that inspires me to write, however I rarely write anything that is politically provocative.

Q: Given your history within the performing arts do you think poetry is more poignant when performed as apposed to when it is read? A: When a poem is performed it is far easier to gage emotion and poetic intention. It is akin to speaking face to face rather than on the phone. A few facial expressions can certainly bring a poem to life. There are so many areas modern poets can now explore .

“I am inspired by my senses and the emotions they trigger”

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The abundance of technology provides us with so many possibilities. Poetry in dance, film and set to music for example, are all interesting ways to utilize technology and create something a little different. Having said this, I have been moved on many occasions and even reduced to tears by reading a poem and I would like to think that others may be moved by my written work as well. I am a bit of a traditionalist and I wouldn’t like to say poetry is more poignant one way or the other.

I do believe however that poetry when performed and particularly when filmed brings in a wider even global audience.

Q: You are due to travel around India next year, we hope you will still be involved with Brighton Arts Club. Do you have any plans in regard to writing throughout the trip? A: I am indeed due to travel to India with my partner in 2014 for a few months, I will certainly be writing whilst I am there. I have been to India before and am very much in love with the country. Whenever I visit India I am greatly inspired, particularly by the landscape. I will continue to be involved with Brighton Arts Club when I return and perhaps treat you all to the occasional poetry performance via video link. Brighton Arts Club is my creative hot spot, I have developed hugely, not just as a poet but as a person Thanks to Pasha du Valentine for all of her love and support not personally but creatively.

Photograps: ŠGoddamn Media/Pasha du Valentine.

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Where’s Wooly..? Music journalist Where’s Wooly chats to us about all things Brighton before giving us an in depth review of Brighton Arts Club’s Psychedelic Jazz night. Q: How important is music criticism in the development of up and coming bands? A: The relationship between music criticism and up and coming bands is always going to be one of love and hate. A good critic can influence record sales, genre labelling and create industry buzz. Q: What are your thoughts on the music venues that Brighton has to offer? A: Brighton's a hive of activity for all creative souls. If you know where to look, you'll find a venue to suit any scene. Q: Would you say that the music scene in Brighton is versatile? A: As versatile as a Swiss Army knife Q: Are there any local bands that you currently have your eye on? A: Hmm... For stompin' blues I would say ‘John Crampton’ ,Anthemic, for alternative rock-'Little Fears'. For heavy rock-'Haunted by Jeremy Beadle', and my particular favourite the mellow Bon Iveresque 'Omnivert'.

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Photograph: Eve (Alex Robinson /JBD Abercrombie.)

Q: What music projects are you currently involved in? A: I'm currently involved in the spoken word/music group 'Eve', and the hard-hitting anthemic band 'Tacenda'. Check em' out!


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Psychedelic Jazz at Brighton Arts Club

VELS TRIO ARTICLE

Vels Trio

Tusks

Haunted by Jeremy Beadle The opening act, ‘Haunted by Jeremy Beadle’ blew me away! Through complex time signatures and rhythm changes the head bopping, heavy jazz groove had the audience screwfacing to every beat. I’m not talking your standard James Brown funky guitar rhythms but flawless fret-board work from both guitarists Johnny Frasier and Levy Kano held together by Lawrence Jenner (bass) and Ryan Wilson (drums).

Ryan Wilson (drums). Both demonstrated great musicianship and were the driving force behind the infectious pulse of the music. Haunted by Jeremy Beadle have an eclectic mix of musical genres prevalent in their music; a mix of jazz guitar voicing’s, funky rhythms and heavy riffs. The band were somewhat lacking in dynamic variation, perhaps due to the fact they are currently without a singer. However they maintained the audience’s attention and I personally would stay instrumental. Haunted by Jeremy Beadle are definitely one to watch.

Tusks hit back with a wall of psychedelic grunge. Tom Sullivan (guitarist) produced an incredible sound only accentuated by the phenomenal acoustics of the venue. (Brighton Arts Club) The experimental pedal use gave the set the dynamic depth that perhaps Haunted By Jeremy Beadle were 20


lacking. George Boorman, (bass) laid down some dark Sabbathesque tones while Nick Klar (drums) never missed a beat though he appeared half asleep. A bit of showmanship from the band wouldn’t have gone amiss. However the audience eagerly

soaked

up

the

shoe-gazing

hypnotic

sounds. Headliners Vels Trio, an instrumental jazz three piece were truly mind-blowing. One audience member exclaimed: “Wow! Did that really happen?” Despite a few rhythmic mishaps at the start the audience were truly engrossed with what was a phenomenal and musically articulate performance. The complex and somewhat experimental time signatures partnered with tight rhythm changes and sublime dynamics only demonstrated the musical talent and flare within the band. Vels Trio have all the stage presence of a touring band although it’s only been three years since conception. Herbie Cuffe (saxophone) guest appeared, adding yet another layer to an already rounded band. Cameron Dawson (bassist) currently of Mama’s Gun and James StephensonOliver (keyboard) clearly loaded with great harmonic knowledge, set the mood for the night. Towards the end the audience became almost spellbound as Jack’s hands became a blur. Dougal Taylor (drums) kept time through some jaw-dropping tempo and rhythm changes that would have disorientated any intermediate musician. Vels Trio covered ‘These Are a Few of My Favourite Things’ from the Sound of Music, a fantastic choice. Initially Jack described his music as space jazz before quickly explaining he favoured being referred to as an instrumental group, and I think space jazz is pretty accurate. They ended to tumultuous applause from a satisfied audience. In response to that audience member, ‘Yes it did, and we hope it will again!’ Vels Trio have a residency at Brighton Arts Club, their next show is on the 24th January W.W 21


Beta Rockers Dub Club Presents Brighton N

a t t y

Rasamurai Irie and Tom Gibbs or Beta Rockers as they prefer to be known run one of the most successful dub nights in Brighton. They host regular nights in and around the city and have a residency at Brighton Arts Club. Look out for Brighton Dub Club posters all over town. Both originally out- of -towners they found their love of music from a young age. Tom Gibbs has extensively studied music production and is an accomplished musician. He plays an array of musical instruments to a high standard including banjo, guitar, piano and melodica often incorporating live sampling into the Beta Rockers set. Tom composes and produces is own music both alone and with Natty. Hailing from humble beginnings in South London Natty Rasamurai Irie is an accomplished bass player and digital musician. Both massive reggae fans Tom and Natty both host shows on codesouth.fm where they met and formed Beta Rockers. Originally the idea behind the duo was to bring back dance music from twenty to thirty years ago. Beta Rockers current set is predominantly reggae based however the boy’s, (both serious vinyl collectors) music tastes and styles are ever evolving. 2014 looks set to be a massive year for Beta Rockers with a more business minded approach as they start up their own production company and record label. As resident DJ’s at Brighton Arts Club, Beta Rockers host Brighton Dub Club which falls on the second Saturday of each month. 22


Phototgraphs: ŠGoddamn Maedia/Pasha du Valenine/Spirit de la Mare.

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DOJO

Brogue’s favourite reggae band

Formed in 2013, Dojo is a collective of the best young jazz and reggae musicians from across the globe. From South Africa, to Russia, the UK, and Ireland, Dojo’s starkly political 21st century outlook and uncanny talent for melody and harmony are taking reggae from the underground to the mainstream for the first time in a generation. Vocalist Khanyisa Twani was born to a Christian minister and a teacher in Cape Town a few years before the fall of apartheid. During her formative years her family were subject to horrific acts of discrimination. The relationship between her black father and white mother provoked much animosity. On one occasion her father was arrested and beaten under suspicion of being a supporter of the ANC. When he was unable to make a confession, Twani’s grandparents were also apprehended and threatened. Twani’s family emigrated from South Africa to the UK when she was five years old, in search of a better life and education for Khanyisa and her brothers. It was here that Twani developed a remarkable, age-defying sense of soul, channeled through her extraordinary singing voice. Since a young age, Khanyisa has left listeners awestruck by the strength of her heartfelt voice. Before Dojo, Twani was working as a solo artist, something she has pursued since attending high school. Khanyisa had already played copious amounts of gigs, festivals and had even taken her music to countries such as Paris and Croatia. Her talents were honed with tenures in gospel choirs and through collaborations with the UK’s foremost jazz musicians, including the pianist James Pearson, artistic director of Ronnie Scott’s jazz club. Whilst making a name for herself by performing her own songs on the London circuit, Twani met bestselling writer and jazz Hammond Organist Ben Cormack and the pair formed a writing partnership. Cormack had previously written and produced music for himself and others, and the combination of both talented musicians saw the beginning of Dojo. They were joined by Robin Porter, recipient of the George Murphy Trophy for Jazz Saxophone, and V-Drum World Championship finalist Conor Bailey, to complete work on Dojo’s acclaimed debut EP, Descry. Since their assembly, Dojo has been joined by the talented Will Lynch, who plays the lead guitar in the band, providing the eclectic melodies and riffs that give such a unique sound. Bassist Alex Wheeler has since accompanied Dojo, alongside backing vocalists Olivia Lynch and Olivia Rosenthall. Dojo’s music is a celebration of the rich heritage of African, English, and American music. Lyrical content featuring up-to-the-minute political and philosophical observations comes from a combined Christian, Buddhist, and Atheist viewpoint. Explorations of joy, despair, and human nature are underpinned by an overriding theme of harmony and spiritual connection between all living things. Dojo’s live shows, which showcase the band’s heightened sense of showmanship and their remarkable musicianship, have received widespread critical acclaim. Within their first few months as a fully formed band they were asked to play shows in Egypt, and have performed with reggae legends, Groundation, in Brighton. Particularly fond of the area, the band has become a resident act at The Brighton Arts Club, where they will be playing throughout 2014. If you haven’t managed to check them out, come down and give them a listen, or download their debut EP, Descry, from iTunes. –Olivia Rosenthall 24


Photographs:Š Goddamn Media/Pasha du Valentine/ Spirit de la Mare

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Introducing The Devil Rides In The house band

Brighton Arts Club

The Devil Rides In, a four piece band based in Brighton formed in early 2013. Though judging by their collaborative integrity you would never know.

The line up comprises of Larry Marks (eight stringed bass and vocals) Paul (saxphone and clarinet), Ben Green (guitar, banjo and mandolin). Danny Luke Southwell (drums and backing vocals).

Previous bands have included Hijak Oscar, We Could Be Astronauts, In The Black, Wonderbus, Animal Language and Spit Shake Sisters.

Ben currently also plays in King Lagoons Flying Swordfish Dance Band and Larry and Danny provide the rhythm section for Max Rafferty (ex The Kooks). The sound of The Devil Rides In can be described as multi-genre bringing together aspects of rock, pop, jazz, folk and pysch.

The band are set to record a double A single, Knackers Yard/Blood Memories at the end of January. The band hold a monthly residency at the Brighton Arts Club and have been the house band since the club’s early days.

Paul Nicholson -

(Below and bottom left; The Devil Rides In playing Brighton)

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Paul Nicholson -

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ALICE PURNELL OBE

chats to Brogue

Alice Purnell OBE is a 70-year-old woman, disabled with osteoarthritis, recovering after a triple bypass, cardiac problems and bladder cancer. As she watches her own health deteriorate her concerns now lie with issues such as the care for the elderly as cutbacks continue to put their wellbeing under threat. Alice was born in Hammersmith though considers herself a true Brightonian having lived here for 64 years. She worked as a geriatric specialist nurse for 30 years, and then returned to University of Brighton for a postgraduate diploma in counselling and psychology. Mental illness has always been a matter close to her heart not least because her son Ben died at just 25 having suffered with schizophrenia. The pain endured during her bereavement lead her to the Samaritans where she later became a volunteer. Alice founded the Gender Trust and Gendys as support agencies and networks for those troubled by their gender identity, and their loved ones. She organised many conferences and published several books, journals and research projects to raise awareness and to offer hope to those in the GLBTI spectrum. Many of whom lead incredibly isolated lives. Her holistic support as a counsellor is perpetually on offer. Not only this but Alice also contributes to training nurses and at Threshold, an organization that provides housing and help for persons suffering with mental illness. She also challenges Government bodies on issues of equality and respect. In the New Years honours list 2012 she was awarded an OBE, for “Services for Transgendered People”, but sought no publicity.

The Independent’s Pink List described her as “National Treasure” along side better

known names such as Sandi Tosvig, Stephen Whittle OBE, Stephen Fry, Alan Bennett and thirty five other 28


media celebrities! Though Alice prefers a quiet life seeking little recognition or fame for her contributions it should be noted that although she actively supports Stonewall and Amnesty. She is a keen feminist and was even briefly at the Women’s Peace Camp in Greenham Common. Like many of us Alice shares a low opinion of capitalism, greed and power-mad politicians. Above all she tries to understand, educate and to listen – “one size fits all is madness,” she says. “People are diverse and that is a delight”. Issues for GLBTI people have vastly improved in recent years, but for some isolated individuals these still remain, It is sad that so many families are so unsupportive of their loved ones. Bullying and lack of respect are deplorable. Extremists can be so cruel. She says smiling, “All extremists should be shot” - Alice says smiling,

Be the Flame and not the Moth, Alice’s poetry anthology was recently published within which she balances pain with love and laughter.

From the moment she discovered Brighton Arts Club and the open mic

night.

From the offset was delighted at the level of acceptance from all. “I was so pleased to listen to work by such a gifted cross section of aspiring poets and writers in a non-sexist or ageist, informal space, that is filled with fascinating artwork and interesting people, not least the brave exotic Pasha, the boss of BAC, and her talented daughter Spirit.”

In this city we are indeed lucky that diversity is celebrated, and we can enjoy the quirkiness, the sea and our Sussex countryside. She mused

recently over the

wrecked skeleton of the old West Pier, where she once romantically walked with her lover years ago; “With love in your heart even an old wreck can be beautiful”. Brogue

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LONDON ROAD A hump of land twixt railway lines and a main road That went its way beside the Winterbourne stream Its way taken by a fat Prince in Royal process Towards his gaudy fun pleasure Palace Pavilion by the sea. Fashionable courtiers and hangers on followed him. Kemp and others of his kind built fine mansions for them, Brighthelmstone became London by the seaside For dirty weekenders – Bright on, Right on, Lights off, Nights on and on and on. The Steam train ’ s rails brought more and more, But railways were replaced by the roads To bring these sea-siders and their goods. Wagons, horses and handcarts served the needs of these “new folk ” , Carried their coal and milk, the post and ale. Street markets and handcarts were later lost to polite shops, Railwaymen had homes and space; poor folk’ s slums grew And Demon drink held top place Town councillors anxiously built schools and a pool Anglicans built a new Parish Church – ST Bart ’ s herein A vast red brick arc to draw and save their souls from sin Temperance nonconformist ’ s built their chapels, 30

Cont...

While others provided plenty of pubs. After Beeching ’ s cuts railways lost to road transport. Engine houses, workshops, warehouses, marshalling yards And sidings all gone to make an unwanted wasteland For Sunday markets, car parks and graffiti artists. Busy Charity, betting and pound shops replaced the Butcher, baker and candlestick maker, even Woolies was gone. A window on Brighton’ s past A changing space, a different place A space in which to think And perhaps enjoy a drink. So raise your glass and shift your arse

Alice Purnell OBE


WORDS In the Bible, Torah and Koran God apparently said I am the Word So three great religions rely on words written by MEN long ago and translated and endlessly interpreted and rewritten by men to place the blame of Sin on WOMAN These patriarchs use these, their words, as clubs to beat those guilty of being different or in any way not like the Men of the Word For men, in their heterosexist gender binary exclusive power position, only the mother is revered, so all women are second class;

Cont...

mouths as a Promise of equality Men thought gossip was the only way silly brainless women used their Un-careful words. This made men word blind and unaware of the message of these silent, uneducated women gagged by Centuries of ideas of their own male superiority. So choose your words carefully and say to each of these patriarchal hateful discriminators, vile warmongers, oligarchs, xenophobes, racists and all bigots and bullies “FUCK OFF.”

Alice Purnell OBE

Seen as the witch or seductress, or the girl child ruled by hormones But virgins are valued But we women use words, a spoken language, a strong message of Love to sooth. In the past writers and poets were all men, they had more Time to kill. They used word play and rhyme to express their

Women were silent. Word smiths were word perfect in their utterances were the last word. Women could not get a word in edgeways, men wrote “for them” As their leaders. A few spoke up for women, put words into their

Illustration by Spirit de la Mare

feelings; but

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ODD SOX

I ’ ve got 47 socks, including 11 pairs, lovers come and wear my socks, move on and leave me theirs.

Here ’ s a red sock for example, belonging once to Kim; she who now cooks lunch for Gary, this green sock belongs to him.

Every sock can tell a story, they have ambitions of their own, when I ’ m out with two old favourites sometimes one does not come home….

On my left foot there ’ s a white sock on my right foot there ’ s a blue, even though they smell somewhat, they make me think of you and you….

People say odd sox is crazy, people say I ’ m queer, people say I ’ ve lost my marbles - well I haven ’ t, I ’ ve got them here.

I ’ ve got 47 marbles, including 11 pairs Lovers come and roll my marbles move on and leave me theirs.

Arthur Smith

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Paris Poem So here we are in Paris in spring The lovers all love and the clochards all sing But every morning through the 8 o’clock blue The postman comes with nothing from you There is The Boulevard St Michelle The Rue St Dennis The Champs Elysee But no you. So I dip my croissant in my café au lait I open the window and call in the day But in spite of the Seine, the birds, and the sun It’s no fun in Paris buying garlic for one There is The Rue de La Huchette The Louvres (shut on Tuesdays) The tour St Jacques But no you Then I heave myself on the Clignancourt line And the busker there he sings so fine That I’m lost in the world of the Metromen Til I see you’re not there and it hurts again There is The boulevard St Germain The muse des beaux arts ( also shut on Tuesdays) The marchee aux puces But no you I ain’t gonna live in Paris no more Get the 9.57 from the gare Du Nord But whenever, wherever, the train may go You won’t be there to kiss me hello There’ll be France England America Every place All of them without you Arthur Smith 1975 Now I’ve drained my last glass and summoned the waiter I’m back here in Paris and it’s thirty years later But I know when I’ve walked up the Avenue Kleber I’ll open the door – and you will be there! There is The champ de Mars The Trocadero La rue Lauriston Le tout Paris All of them All of them All of them with you Arthur Smith 2007

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That ’ s What He Would Have Wanted Joint before I left Cigarettes in the frozen Merc Following the hearse For him it must have got worse

Crowding in the confused church Longing for a fag And one less verse For him it must have got worse

The day he got buried Was brittle, painful, cold Shivering girls In long black dresses Big boots and earring in the nose This is not a funeral For someone old The music falters by the grave Funny sad For him it must have got too bad

Photos by Steve Ullathorne with kind permission

Arthur Smith

A section of a hand drawn backdrop by Pasha du Valentine

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E.G. in NW3 (by Karen Withecomb) We hurtled down a staircase to the bowels of the Earth, Bowling down whilst gulping at that last half inch of beer, Side-stepping as deftly as a drunken person can The broken-up black slime lino and the deadly metal treads. We disappeared into the half-lit basement where the PA kind of worked. We sank into the tired old sofas with the prangly springs and sticky tape, Casting guitar cases, notebooks, picks and optimistic merchandise this way and that, In the bonhomie and last-minute exam revision style bravado of the next one up, Each name scrawled in black marker pen, the top still poking out of mine host ’ s mouth. We lavished our attention and applause on all the others, mostly very young or old. I did my bit, engaging you with worlds of words or smoke and darkened glass. The oldest hippy in the world leant back, appearing to be dozing, dosed or otherwise. I almost lost my thread whilst wondering if his beer would spill, but he ’ s an antique expert; The eyes might close but like a sleeping bird his claws grip firmer still the pint pot in his grasp. He touched my shoulder afterwards, apparently he liked the set. I was amazed. Whilst magic-carpeting around the astral plane he ’ d somehow heard it all, His once-green eyes now rheumy, once resplendent hair now grizzled in a greyish tail. A flurry of noise and brittle little giggles make us stare; people back there. A gaggle of girls and hearty, too-loud mates called Henry accompany their king. The twenty-something with the perfect skin and teeth of an expensive postcode youth, At first glance wafted in from sunny uplands of the warm-gold autumn day just passed. At first glance too cool, preoccupied with better fun than this to be here with the ghouls At second glance bedecked with noisome incongruity in clothes of the less fortunate. The clothes of the less fortunate from 1992. The baseball cap with peak determinedly pointing down his well-formed vertebrae, Torso disguised beneath a t shirt made for one more bulky or less archly styled. He moaned about the sound, the tone, the everything whilst that smug grin hung in the air. So disingenuous, within his head, within his stupid crowd he rules the world forever and a day. So what did you have for us then Josh, locked within the velvet box of heart and mind? A simulacrum of fashionable-in-this-millisecond baritone with would-be witty words. But I know you, I ’ ve known you all my life: Belittling the girls who won ’ t suck up and worship and adore. Whilst bitches, killed with fear that they might join that number, laugh at putrid jokes unfunny as a stroke. Mister Self-satisfied, ringleader of your fawning clan, was that a tribute act to urban-of-the36

moment


Cont...

Was that your best shot, if you had the nous to know what ‘best shot ’ even meant, you smirking fool? As all his entourage from hell left quickly as they ’ d arrived in Styxville, Camden, London town, I mused on his departure as the final titters, tinny, vacuous curled up and up the stairs. Good luck with your career of gilded, rested laurels, daddy-given, expectation high, Good luck with plagiarising others with a halfway –decent voice too lauded and too loud. Good luck pale imitation, dress-up box recording artist, singer henceforward know to me as ……Just e.g.

Mya Cohen Preparing for Gay Pride 2013 in the drop in communal studio which is free to all members.

37


JBD ABERCROMBIE Q: Do you feel that studying literature at degree level hinders your creative output? A: Yes. University is undoubtedly a perfect spring board in which to throw yourself into whatever subject fascinates you. However, there are only so many hoops you can jump through or books that you can be told to read before you start to feel claustrophobic. Whilst going to university was the best decision I ever made, I have absolutely no intention of applying for a Masters. I intend to further my education from the comfort of my armchair on terms which our entirely my own.

Q: You tend to adopt traditional forms, why? A: There are certain forms that thousands of poets have spent their whole lives trying to perfect. In my opinion, to completely ignore them is either lazy or ignorant. Exploration and experimentation is vital to creative practise and I think that in order to grow you should interact with the legacies of others on a daily basis.

Q: Talk to us about Eve. A:Eve is a three piece band consisting of guitar, bass and poetry. We came together to promote each other's ideas, make good music and see how far we could push the parameters of poetry and song without going near rap or hip hop.

Q: Why did you feel the need to put your poetry to music? A: When I started listening to poets who introduced music into their sets, they seemed to use it as a static backdrop. The poetry was applied to the music or the music to the poetry without any real attempt to create a fluid braid. As a genre I feel there is so much space which is as of yet, completely unexplored, Alex and Charlie happened to agree.

Q: Last year you collected the Myriad publishers' Creative Writer of the Year Award, how do you intend to build on your current success?

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A: Someone's commitment to their craft shouldn't need to be validated with pieces of paper, but when you find yourself floating amongst a sea of voices who are all fighting to be heard I think we all need it from time to time. In regards to the future, I intend to carry on doing what I am doing now regardless of how I am received critically.

ŠBrighton Arts Club/Amelia Thomas 39


Joy

Back In A Bit

Lasting happiness is a shiny ball

Frozen in the ice cold water

which we chase as it rolls in front of us

the relentless waves crashing down

we don ’ t ask why, we just know that we a crimson curtain of laughter,

must. Nature or nurture, perhaps it was school or something divine commanding us all, you could say that it ’ s love, instinct or lust

the hazy surface of the ground STAMP STAMP STAMP

whatever it is, it commands your trust each time you approach a towering wall. You ’ ll climb amongst clouds without a tether you ’ ll try your hardest to ignore the drop

Broken shards of a bleary sky a swirling flurry of trainers

sometimes you ’ ll feel like it ’ s lost forever,

the shrinking moon through swollen eyes,

like it ’ s a bubble that ’ s about to pop

the swearing, tearing strangers

but just as a breeze carries a feather

STAMP STAMP STAMP Drowning in slow motion impacts clawing at a face in the stars

Growing taller never up...

the distant echoes of snaps and cracks, flashing images of the past

The little boys Who chase the fallacious construct Of the cheeky monkey With no wear and tear Will end up Driving Sports cars. JBD Abercrombie

40

STAMP STAMP BLACK


The Brighton Arts Club cats.

41


42

Photograph: Brighton Arts Club by Denise Felkin


London Road Thrown into the pits of hell, Ravished by flesh eating hounds, Devoured by sorrow ’ s serpents, A place called Lost and Found. Putrid roads soaked in death, Gold teeth and daggers but guns are best! Blood filled waters sipped like wine, Supposed freedom and rights divine. A dancing temptress and lustful queens, Dirty boys with dirtier dreams, A people plagued solitude and tumored minds, Death breeds death, as the blind lead the blind. Dance with the minions, then laugh when they fall, Make you punish yourself; the worst pun ’ shment of all. Welcome to the pits of hell, even I can ’ t save you now. Tread carefully my dear... ...in glorious Brighton town.

Photographs: ©Goddamn Media/Pasha du Valentine. Spirit de la Mare. Styled by

By Spirit de la Mare

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This poem was written especially for the "Mean Streets" exhibition that was held at Brighton Arts Club in November 2013. The exhibition was a celebration of the London Road area in Brighton and was also Brighton Arts Club ’ s first birthday.

The lost Winterbourne that Joel refers to is "Brighton's Lost River" that once ran along side London Road as well as other parts of Brighton.

Mimics

Cont...

Traffic mimics The spirit Of the lost Winterbourne, Like the singing in the city backstreets Over duff piano notes and Slack beats., Where blue lights flash and sirens echo the pitch of a screeching boy.

Silence once golden, Greyed By plenty thousand tears Earlier than the morning, Earlier than the alarm, As the rain pours Like my once dry heart That now bleeds freely. At the head and end of the kingdom.

The lost Winterbourne Reconditioned Permanently And in constant evolution To be free of misery, In every hour Where like one, two And maybe three and four birds more And shadows Of the here and now And Spirits Fluctuate between the two.

And the music Stopped.

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Travelling times Across lifelines, Swimming up stream And down too, Hard to breath In a world hard to conceive, Through blood-stained emotions, Torn and blooded Mimics of the lost Winterbourne.

Joel Boardman


She Spoke In my dreams she spoke, Keeping me from breaking In my waking, Reminding me to stay woke.

Secrets may reveal Shame and regret, But to forgive and forget Is the only way to heal.

She gave me her sweet song, A guiding light For the dark nights Of this walk of life I move along.

Joy lives in each loving stroke Of her protective calls; A truth that enthrals, Reminding me to stay woke.

Joel Boardman

lating a dream that his "brother" Nick Pierce had about Erykah Badu, it revealed the meaning of his dream but also expresses the love they both share for her art.

Illustration by Pasha du Valentine

*Joel wrote this poem after trans-

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Thomas Wolfe Thomas Wolfe is a twenty-one year old poet and spoken word performer originally from West London moved to Brighton lacking direction in life. Struggling to fit in anywhere or find an adequate outlet for his poetic urges stumbled across an advert for the open mic night at Brighton Arts Club. He performs, busks and has a work ethic unlike anyone. Brogue chatted with Tom and discussed his plans for the future.

Q: You studied Media at degree level, do you think there is an overlap between media studies and performance poetry? A:Definitely. Media teaches you to think critically which helps to write something that conveys a message.

Q: When did you start writing poetry and at what point did you shift from written verse to spoken word. A:I used to rap with my friends at secondary school on the back of the bus. As I toned down my material and gained a sense of lyrical direction it became more poetic discourse than hip hop.

Q: A lot of people may argue that poetry is a dying art form in this day and age, what is your opinion? A: I could not disagree more. In the eight months I have attended open mic at Brighton Arts Club the attendance has rocketed. I am lucky enough to hear some truly great writers who no doubt will be at the forefront of the poetry scene in the future.

Q: Do you feel that there are enough venues in and around Brighton which promote poetry events. A: I don't believe there is. A lot of venues that host open mic nights solely look for musicians and poetry is often sidelined. This is a great shame as the city is full of poetic flare and literary talent. Perhaps it the image of poetry and how it is perceived by people that don't write, that needs to change. I ’ m sure we can work on that.

Q: We have spoken a lot about your poetry so far however, you also contributed to the pull-out comic available with this issue of Brogue. How did your collaboration with Stephanie Hope come about? A: Comics are my life and I have written dozens of issues. The artist I am working with Stephanie Hope was an artist I had previously commissioned to design a poster for my night at Brighton Arts Club. I was so blown away with her style I insisted on a collaboration. I sent her the scripts and the rest you can see for yourselves. 46


Photograph: ŠGoddamn Media/Amelia Thomas (BAC)

47


TO ME BY THOMAS WOLFE A SPOKEN WORD PIECE

Her powdered up bones Lay as pretty white lines atop my table Her little white lies often exacerbated in to fables She could never keep her story straight On that plates her meat Which I could eat as elegantly As when she would spoon feed me her Lies Her eyes Now they're a delicacy I've pickled them for later I fucking hate her But I love her I grimace as ever guzzle of her blood gushes down my gullet The pistol held against my temple and in not afraid to pull it These bullet will be released When are existences our one I put down the gun. I have more to devour Her sour inner organs Which plagued me with such torment But I got my revenge She used to lay around this place To grace me with her presence But now she lays around displaced And is nothing more than evidence.

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Photograph by Amelia Thomas. Copyright 2014 Goddamn Media Brighton Arts Club

49


50

Poem and Illustration by Ade Sluzky


The Cannibal Party

The first signs, were the crimes. People went missing and their bones were found, lying around.

At first the blame was placed on some lone sicko to be chased. But when he was caught and justice brought...

More bones were found lying around.

The special investigation result stated this was the work of a copycat cult, that blended religious and fascist iconography; a malevolent strain of body/flesh pornography...

Flayed carcasses began to increase in findings, a Spring of fear began it windings.

As more and more people went missing, it was a political agenda that no longer bore dismissing. Discussions were held in cloisters and halls, in blood, the truth was written on the walls...

The situation worsened, with no signs of improvement. This was too big for a cult, this was a popular movement.

The Cannibal Party declared it's place and began to make known its case,

was a cowards reign; now brother must eat brother...

"Eat or be eaten," spake the chosen few. Sharpen your teeth or climb into the stew. By Ade Sluzky

Illustration by Jamie Blackett

that the moral platform of caring for each other

51


A FEW WORDS POETRY FROM

SPIRIT DE LA MARE

A lone run Not honey glazed, Nor phased by morality or mistruths, Food for fools and poor pours, Bound by forty-thousand rules. Hocus-pocus, focus on freedom and folklore. Bore me senseless with delusions of forevermore. Never more. Self applaud a magical illusion, mirrors and fraud! Suppose this...You know it, Apposed it or lost it. Breathe in, retrieve it. See it, hold it. Be bold or blow it! Live it and love it or don’ t even think it! Have it, own it, Glow with it or fight it. Why not role with it? Do you hate it? Your fate, whit and freedom. Fury and thunder of ships going under, As you blunder with indecision. Precision and dedication, Magical self medication. Moments of atonement, A lone run and nonsense! Newness, clueless with delusions of confusion. Fess up to messing up, And guzzle down poison. Snake bites and hate fights, but know you ’ re right. No wrong in a dismal song, Just a lust for love that seems long gone! 52

Breathe in this evening and out in the morning. Hold your breathe, know less, no less. Keep in what ’ s left! Romance or finance, love, lust and loss Of a star-gazing, fake, taking, riddle maker. Love forsaken, breaking, broken, taken! Emotional terrorist, irrational therapist, a sick and twisted lyricist or musical hypnotist? Bored of logic; the system analyst. Crazed anarchist versus ignorant fascist, but who ’ d ever know? I know, you know Water seeds that never grow, in barren lands of wishful thoughts. It ’ s done, it ’ s taught by a battle, we both won, lost and fought. Still fighting, still writing a plan that cant be flawed. Blissful ignorance, bashful and belligerent, Witness statement, lies and encasement. Breakages and bev ’ rages , debauchery and slaughter, Lights and the rights of loves first daughter. The painful blisters of philosophical thinkers on a mind tender, Love letter, letter writer, moral mender, Or just a great pretender? Bullshit or wisdom, teeth gnawing at the flaws. Closed doors and walls of thick brick… Mind tricks and words slick, Mad and enraged with mem ’ ries of clocks and tock-ticks… These rocking toxins are toxic… Am I love sick? Or just sick of love?


Photograph: ŠGoddamn Media/Amelia Thoams

Coal There, embedded within the vastness,

Tick Tock

The concept picks worm holes into my skull.

An ever ticking clock.

Like a snake of truth lost within her own faults,

Orbits act as cupped hands filled with abounding treas-

I wander through heaven in search of another hell.

ure.

A creeping thought, a concern or a cell?

Each orb; a note within a symphony of inspired dedica-

A daunting love, an insistent urge,

tion,

A promise to a melody that no one heard.

Rotating in harmonious splendour.

A persistent hum, relentless in such aggravation.

Surely more than a series of chance encounters?

The world seems to starve without creative notion.

More than a haphazard mistake, that birthed an acci-

And I too would die.

dental perfection.

There is no controlling the narration.

Within such an epic rendition; a union of minds,

To a tale repeatedly well served.

A marriage of thoughts,

The story teller evolution, the pillow time.

Within an ever blazing furnace of time.

Growth and enlightenment bloom,

But how this solace becomes superfluous,

Gods within the most mortal pantomime.

In comparison to such enormity.

One day within the bustle,

Just an echo of events past,

And again within the folly,

Rebounding off the invisible mirrors of fate.

A piece of coal enlightened; a diamond of all things

For as I drown in moments of my own,

holy!

Great oceans shift and alternate worlds align.

Before moment embedded his head in the pillow,

An ever ticking clock,

A leaf of the deepest green,

That will never be mine

Twisted its logic and nourished a dream. This time his growth, grew not green but a velvet-

-Spirit de la Mare

een red. In place of that leaf... A rose grew instead.

- Spirit de la Mare 53


A WOMAN WITH AN ANGLE TO GRIND……….. Vera Boing is one of the artists in residence at Brighton Arts Club and has been with us almost since the beginning. Her incredible sculptures are suspended from the cathedral like ceiling and always attract the visitors eye. Vera completed a foundation course in Art & Design at Winchester School of Art, and Graduated from Bradford and Ilkley Community College in 1990 with a B.A. Honours degree in Art & Design. In the course of her studies she developed a passion for welding, creating life sized abstract figurative sculptures from re-cycled materials. During this time Vera also worked with Raise the Roof, a stage production and design company, and toured with Skinning the Cat, an aerial trapeze troop. Later Vera diversified to create fire sculptures for events in England, and later throughout Europe, including “Blast-off 94” at Tacheles, Berlin, and a number of events on M.S Stubnitz, Kulturschiff, Rostock. She settled for nine years in Berlin, where she was involved with and initiated a variety of community art projects, also working for a couple of years at the R.A.W. Tempel, Community Arts Centre. She participated in the annual Rest-cycling festival, and created costumes and floats for the Karneval der Kulturen. During this time Vera also completed a welding course to develop techniques and good practice. In 2004 she moved back to England to study an Art & Design P.G.C.E. (secondary level) in Brighton, and spent several years teaching in schools throughout Sussex. Currently self employed she has run creative workshops at festivals and events, as well as creating walkabout performance pieces and fire-sculptures. She also worked for the Wishing Tree Trust - providing mask making workshops at activity holidays, aimed to support families to overcome crisis Vera Boing is the working and performing name of Jane Waudby (B.A. Hons, P.G.C.E.) who lives locally with her two teenage children.

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The centre piece for the show Re-Creation which is an ongoing exhibition at Brighton Arts Club is loosely based on Michelangelo’s image of the creation on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Two androgynous figures seem to soar and stretch towards the roof representing spiritual and physical freedom and joy. Smaller expressive pieces will seem to be engaged in acts of dance and celebration. Pieces are created from cutlery, domestic appliances and other tools found in the kitchen - the traditional domain of women and mothers.


Copyright Goddamn Media/ Pasha du Valentine

‘Re-Creation’ a permanent exhibition by

Vera Boing at Brighton Arts Club

Copyright Goddamn Media/ Pasha du Valentine 55


Pasha du Valentine

Brighton Art Club

Artist & Founder

Pasha du Valentine is the founder and owner of Brighton Arts Club. Brougue meets up for a tour around her studio and to discuss her hopes and aspirations for the club. I am technically Scottish but my father was in the Royal Navy so by the time I was five I had already hoofed it around the globe. We settled in a small south coast town which became, for me at least, a hot bed of rebellion. By the time I arrived in Brighton I was fighting fit for battle….that’s the sort of language I use because that’s how it feels to me…..everything is a battle, a battle to be heard, respected, to have influence and to make life better for everyone. I am a socialist and I mean that. I hate Tories. I hate miscarriages of justice. I hate lots of things. The building that Brighton Arts Club calls home was advertised on Gumtree. I was looking for a studio space that was big enough for my ego so came and had look. I didn’t expect to fall in love with this dilapidated wreck of a converted warehouse with the campest staircase in Brighton. Love creeps in. I had a few grand and made my landlord a ridiculous offer expecting his disapproval but his exact words were ‘I like you Pasha, I am going to take a risk.’ Top left ,‘Self Portrait’ by Pasha u Valentine, paint on wood, approx 4’ x 8’ Mid left, ‘Fashion Victim’ by Pasha du Valentine paint on vinyl record, 12” Bottom, ‘Rupert ‘by Pasha du Valentine, paint on canvas, 42” x 60” 56


The rest as they say, is ready for the film script. Our reputation has helped draw amazing volunteers and practitioners. No one gets paid and the atmosphere in the place ranges from chaotic inspiration to boundless excitement. Nothing is impossible when you are part of the club…...we can make anything happen. Loosely the club is divided between music, literature and art although the overlap is fairly obvious. We put on gigs for mostly local bands, usually free and unpaid. Mostly they don’t even get a rider. We now have three regular monthly music nights, Dub Club, Vels Trio Psychedelic Night and the Devil Rides In night who are our resident band. We have also put on nights for BIMM. It is always a pleasure to watch up and coming bands making their mark on the scene. Our open mic nights established a very strong literary arm of the club. We can boast some incredible orators, story tellers, poets and wordsmiths and they really formed the foundation for the magazine. The galleries and studios are the other major part of the club. We sponsor three artists who would otherwise find studio and exhibition space difficult because of financial or emotional difficulties. I also have my studio here. We put on a variety of exhibitions throughout the year and welcome outside artists to get involved.

We also have members who are not directly involved in the club but support us through membership fees. They are sponsors and for a nominal fee can help towards our upkeep. We have a members VIP lounge where we can all meet up three nights a week and put the world to rights. Some of our best strategies have been decided in the VIP over a bottle of Black Rock. There is much to do in Brighton regarding our mission to take over the creative world and put the city on the map. We are not just about naughty postcards and pictures of deck chairs. The talent in this city is breathtaking but there is a sense of misplaced humility, as if we don’t deserve it because we are not London. Having said that, there is no room for the Sunday watercolourist

Above, ‘Did You Know There is a War on Dear?’ by Pasha du Valentine, paint on wood approx 7’ x 4’ Right, ‘The Irish Boy and the Girl From Canvey Island’ by Pasha du Valentine, paint on wood, approx 4’ x 8’ 57


Mya Cohen by Pasha du Valentine, paint on wood, approx 4’ x 8’

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Untitled by Pasha du Valentine, paint on canvas,40” x46”

Both of these paintings are by Pasha du Valentine and are part of an on-going permanent exhibition at Brighton Arts Club. ‘I usually find wood or canvases to paint on in skips or outside houses being renovated. As a result I tend not to have much uniformity of size or shape. The painting of Mya Cohen is massive but because we have such a high ceiling all the work is dwarfed. I stopped using brushes because the size meant it took too long. For a lot of my work I use my hands only.’

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Above, ‘Astral’ by Pasha du Valentine, paint on canvas, approx 4’ x 5’ 60


Above, ‘Old News, by Pasha du Valentine, paint and photo collage on canvas, 30” x 40” 61


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‘For most of my portrait commissions I leave it to the client to decide if they prefer a painting or a photograph. They are very different mediums and create very different results. I do a lot of portfolio work with a bit of an edge. I hate studio lighting and the whole set up that comes with it. I prefer to explore the person as an individual and reveal them in a few shots.’ Left, portrait of Maurisa Selene Coleman by Pasha du Valentine. Above, portrait of Mya Cohen by Pasha du Valentine 63


Pasha du Valentine interviews four artists who were instrumental in shaping minds during the years before MTV, mobile phones and Justin Beaver................. MOMUS Oddball or sidekick of Satan, Momus has been engaging and upsetting people for nearly thirty years. A writer for Wired, Vice and Index magazines as well as a multi media performer who has attracted critical acclaim, Momus has You have a very loyal fan base. Have they been with you since the 1980s?

I actually don't have the impression that I have any fans at all! And yet I do feel "famous" despite that. It's as if it's a fame only I know about. It's probably some kind of schizophrenic delusion.

You're seemingly impossible to describe concisely both as a person and as a performer. Can you tell us how you see yourself and do you recognise yourself in your Wikipedia description for example?

My perception of myself is things like "I smell quite nice today" or "Next thing to be getting on with is new live videos" or "I wonder if I'm too old to get laid now?" or "Time for lunch!" None of this is in my Wikipedia description, so it's clearly wrong. But if you tried to add "Momus feels it's time for lunch" they'd just flag it "Citation required".

There seems to be a rather romantic idea of the maverick wandering about the planet observing and commenting through several mediums, have you worked with other people ever?

Good God, I do nothing but work with other people these days! But when I "work with" other people I'm also alone. I just made a record with David McClymont, but he was in Australia at the time.

What drew you to Japan and how do they react to you?

I like the self-blaming nature of the Japanese: "I am unforgivable" is the basic attitude you adopt here at all times. As a foreigner here I tend to be invisible, as well as unforgivable. It makes for a lot of harmony.

You have a pretty big back catalogue. Do you work constantly and what are you working on today?

I do tend to be working all the time. Today I had a meeting with a Japanese artist, just to chat over coffee, but I also dreamed a song. I dreamed verse 1, woke up, sang it into my computer, fell asleep again and dreamed verse two, woke up again, and sang that into my computer. So you could say I'm working even when I'm asleep! 64


Photograph by Hiroshi Nakamura 65


Stephen Singleton was one of the founding members of the new wave band ABC who achieved huge success worldwide during the 80’ s . When where and how did your involvement with ABC occur?

How much time and space have we got it's a long story...? So I was a punk and started going to nightclubs, the first nightclub I went to was called the crazy Daisy in Sheffield. The daisy, as we called it, had a DJ called Kim who played a fantastic cross-section of music.: punk, funk, disco, David Bowie, Roxy music, James Brown, Dr Feelgood, Donna summer, Kraftwerk, Iggy pop, The Ramones , The Sex Pistols,..it rocked! 66


I decided to write a fanzine. I was influenced by Punk fanzines like Sniffing Glue and Sheffield's Gun Rubber. It was here that I met Mark White and along with an old school friend of mine called David Sydenham we started experimenting with music. We had a couple of old reel to reel tape recorders, a home-made keyboard, a drum machine and a synthesiser. So we formed a band and called it vice versa. David Sydenham left Vice Versa and Mark and myself wanted someone else to bounce ideas off. Martin Fry had a fanzine called Modern Drugs. He came along to do an interview. He seemed to be on the same wavelength as Mark and myself . He couldn't actually play an instrument, but we were all about ideas. We asked Martin to join us on a tour of the UK. . Me and Mark had seen Chic perform at the Sheffield City Hall and we loved what they did. They were like a black Roxy Music. Fucking awesome! One day we realised that Martin could actually sing a bit. So we decided to change the band and embarked on a new idea. We wanted to take the influences of dance music and add our own twist. Just like English boys have done throughout music history. You are a sax player, did you have input in the song writing for the Band? I don't consider myself to be a sax player of great technical ability. I tried to create my own signature sound. I loved Andy Makay, David Sanborn, Junior Walker and the sax players ABC had on tour, Howie Casey and Ray Carless but I am extremely proud of what we did with ABC. We were not fucking around in ABC. We worked together and had a vision about what we wanted to create from the first note to the last . We made some great fucking pop music and I stand by the Lexicon of Love being one of the finest albums ever made. We each contributed to the idea. Martin Fry, David Palmer, Mark White and myself plus our producer Trevor Horn and countless amazing musicians. Many of the 80's new wave bands have enjoyed a second wind, are you pleased to be described being part of something with cult status? I am not really that interested in the retro tour revival thing . I would find it difficult to listen to the re workings of songs I played, with some other person playing my part but if other people enjoy that kind of thing that's fine by me. I love the fact that people still listen to music I helped create but seeing Martin Fry performing as ABC is not something I particularly enjoy. When I see some session musician playing my saxophone parts It's rather like watching the love of your life being fucked by a stranger, in fact it's worse than that, the royalty cheques soften the blow slightly . Are you gigging or writing at the moment? I am always working... It's what I do ... I love it .. What music is on your ipod? I don ’ t use an ipod. I am old school. I like CDs and vinyl. I do a spot of DJ-ing from time to time because I enjoy being told to: "play some music you f*cking c*nt! " and "have you got any Howard Jones? � 67


Stevie ZeSuicide was one members of the punk band UK Subs. He joined them in the early 80 ’ s when they took on a more heavy metal influence, they became the first western band to perform in Poland since the imposition of martial law, and the suppression of the trade union Solidarity.

It ’ s 1980, what are you up to?

Well, I am now in UK. Subs and the new album ‘Crash Course ’ goes straight into the charts at Number 8. We are just starting a sixty-three date British tour and lining up for American Shows. We Perform Top of the Pops once again with Single "Party in Paris" which reaches Number five. Above, StevieZe Suicide I move to Chelsea, London SW3 (very posh) and find that my neighbors include George Best, Bernie Eccleston, and The Rolling Stones amongst others! I am 21 Years old, and buy my own place; a basement Flat in Oakley St, off the Kings Rd. The Kings Rd at this time is a hive of originality and is full of fabulously inventive punks / new romantics / artists, sculptors / fashion designers and poets. The music is Extremely loud and excitingly dangerous! There is a real Italian pizza place on the corner and French cafes everywhere. Happy days, I am in Heaven.

How many times did you do Top of the Pops and who with?

Oh Heck, seven or eight times with U.K. Subs and also with Sinita. I performed in her video "I Don ’ t Believe in Miracles". A Young Simon Cowell booked me for that one, and.. just for the record... yes, he is a very nice person actually. Other artists who we did that show with and whom I met include, The Stranglers, The Who, the Jam, Elton John, the Stones, and Queen.

I have very fond memories of many too, like the Nolans, who were absolutely lovely and good fun too !!! We saw Dr Who's Tardis, met the Daleks, got drunk with Bannanarama, argued with Adam and the Ants (not difficult), I even chatted to Diana Ross about hair colour and the wonders of being blonde. The best band I ever met on there were Spandau Ballet. They are so good to their Fans and friendly with everyone. True professionals. I learnt a lot from them. I wish Top of the Pops would come back again!

Did you ever take a rain check on the music industry?

Yes, I walked away a few years ago feeling so sad at the shallowness of a lot of people, especially the promoters and management, record company people at the time, even fellow band members and musicians who all turned their backs when there was no longer something to gain. By this time I am alone and feel no longer needed as Punk Rock Performer !!!! 68


Suddenly everything is changing and excitement, punk glamour and extremely loud and dangerous music is out of the window! So I walked. I even tried to work in a supermarket rather than play anymore, refusing emphatically to play the old retro circuit. And so as the new, bland and lifeless plant pots who now just stood on the stages in their overcoats and rucksacks bored me into a relentless irreversible coma. I remained in my musical wilderness, away from these dull creatures, now in bands, so uninventive and frightened to be different. Clever little dicks who look like my bank managers assistant with the personalities of dead slugs, or even gudgeon (that's a fish).

Anyway, it wasn't long before it became clear that I didn't fit in with a 9 to 5 or the human race either. I had to get back or die‌.. Plus the supermarket wilder beast were doing my Fucking Head in! So I left the marauding lordies to their eternal blandness, and re-recorded as a singer and signed to a new label; my very own "NOIZE REVOLUTION" had started! Heavily loaded up with my influences such as the early New York Scene of The Velvet Underground, Lou Reed and Iggy Pop, combined with modern day inspirations like Marilyn Manson, LADY GA GA, Scissor Sisters, The Killers and many more. I could now return and continue my work in its reincarnation which has now become "STEVIE ZeSUICIDE".

You have lost some people close to you along the way who were influential on your work...Can you tell about them?

Yes, sex, drugs and death... I seem to have lost many people along the way. The Ramones were a band we toured with often, guitarist Johnny, singer Joey and Bass Player DeeDee have all gone, as have guitarist Johnny Thunders, drummer Jerry Nolan and bass player Arthur Cane of the New York Dolls. Yet none hit me as hard as losing my producer and close friend Trevor Bolder last year, David Bowie's legendary bass player who, along with guitarist Mick Ronson and Woody Woodmansey, completed Bowie's line up of The Spiders from Mars. It was Trevor who helped me find a way forward and confidently continue as an artist. Guitarist Mick Ronson had produced Billy Idol with his first band Generation X years earlier and there has always been a strong connection between Ziggy Above, Trevor Bolder and David Bowie

Stardust and the Spiders and punk! That band were so visually exciting with their unique, raw sound. So for me to

be playing and creating music with this person was extremely influential to my work. Suddenly I was listening to my Ziggy albums again...Hunky Dory, Aladdin Sane, Pin Ups and of course The Rise, Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars. The spark was returning. Now Trevor and I were working on an absolute killer rock album to be called Auto Destructive when he 69


discovered he was ill , very ill. Trevor Bolder lost his short battle with cancer and passed away on 23rd May 2013. Unlike many others, he always believed in what I was trying to achieve, even when all the other so called producers, musicians and friends had fucked off to the hills because there was no more money left to take off me. Trevor stuck by me, finishing off and mastering all my recordings as well as producing more. Just like his former band members, Mick Ronson and David Bowie, Trevor was a pioneer to whom art and music meant so much more than money. He would be so proud and supportive of The Brighton Arts Club and your hard work in helping New Talent.

TREVOR BOLDER 1950 / 2013 R.I.P. What are you up to now Stevie?

Well, I am now really happy with Little London Records and my NoiZE REVOLUTION has become a reality with my second album Auto Destructive due for release in February 2014, along with singles Wild Trash, Radio Boys and the forthcoming Freedom in a Modern World and Revolution Citizen.

My Managers are Terri and Mike Harris of Little London Records and Tam Management. News and documentary information can be seen on the website. (www.steviezsuicide.com) A book of short stories and events in the life of ZeSUICIDE is being written by author Julia Neil. Called Life Like Suicide it will be

“I Dedicate EVERYTHING with thanks to ALL lovers of what I call....

WILD TRASH... 22nd century NOIZE...CHAOS... ANARCHY... & the DESTRUCTION of BOREDOM!!!!”

“NOIZE REVOLUTION for my NOIZEE LITTLE DEVILS Freedom to be YOURSELVES”

STEVIE ZeSUICIDE 70

All photographs StevieZe’s own, with kind permission.

Below, StevieZe Suicide

available in paperback, or on line. I will be visiting Brighton Arts Club to see you all soon.


Above left: Trevor Bolder with Stevie ZeSuicide before Trevor’s untimely death in 2013.

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ONCE UPON A TIME Gazzer was the lead singer and writer for the anarcho-punk band DIRT (Death is Reality Today). They were committed to a cause and still have cult status amongst die hard punks across the globe. They played with Crass on numerous occasions before releasing their first EP on the Crass label. I caught up with Gazzer to find out what he felt about his cult status and what he was up to now. Above, cover of the EP by DIRT, Object, Refuse, Reject Abuse, released on the Crass label in the early 1980’s 72


‘Crass' and their long time touring partners 'The Poison Girls' call it a day... Just who was this punk band from East London that appeared out of nowhere and took over as opening act for Crass? The hows and whys have appeared in occasional fanzines of the time and many have speculated. Lucky for us Gazzer from Dirt is getting a round in and giving Brogue a history lesson.

Its all about me, it always has been and it always will be. (No… Seriously) I was 15/16 in 1976 pretty much a loner at school. I had very few friends and rarely went out. One mate I did have had already left school and was into buying vinyl so we would meet up on Saturdays and visit every record shop we could find. It was during this period that Punk started to rear its beautiful persona. After a few weeks of trekking the shops and buying vinyl I realised that these bands actually played live... in front of people... in clubs. This was something I'd never heard or dreamed of. To me, a live band played in a holiday camp where your parents took you every year, and my ultimate goal was to be a singer at a holiday camp and kiss girls who were the blue coats. (It was a Pontins camp we frequented). I got to see a few bands play. I looked and felt wrong in my own body. The clubs were a little scary. I was in the throes of leaving school and had no idea of a future. As the months rolled by and 1977 kicked in I found myself going to more gigs and cutting off my greasy hippy/kid hair, dying my scalp black and discovering cider, leather jackets, bondage trousers, safety pins. I looked fucking cool! The next few years shaped my life in a way that would never have been possible had The Sex Pistols not appeared with Bill Grundy. I went to every gig I could get to, saw every band that played, I made more friends than I currently have on Facebook. I got drunk, beaten up, had sex, took drugs and it just wasn't enough. Then things started to change. A second wave of punk bands emerged. It was pointed out rightly or wrongly that punk was being sold out, bought up and turned into a product. Punk was my life, gigs, clubs, bars and friends. Suddenly it was about standing up to fight for it! I ignored that and carried on business as usual until I saw the Poison Girls. They were different.

“I ain't gonna try to put it into words, it was something that had to be seen and felt.”

And then there was Crass... Crass and Poison Girls... these guys were fucking intense. The whole concept was something fresh and new to me. I knew this was what I needed and this is what I was gonna have.

I'd already taught myself to play guitar and by 1979 was writing some songs that thankfully never saw the light of day. I sorted out some friends with guitars (the only criteria required for them was that one had a garage & the other had a basement). This went nowhere fast, so I had to up my game!

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I'd grown up through the 77-79 punk scene. I became a very strong character, politically aware and for the very first time heard the word vegetarian. Three years from Billy no mates to the man who can and will change the world!

And we arrive at Dirt. Dirt was my dream, my outlet for what I wanted to say. It was my mark to leave on the world. I wrote songs that at the age of twenty I felt proud of and pointed out the errors in the ways of those who came before. I was so motivated by my own importance that as the band members came along they joined in the frenzy. Our first few gigs saw us playing with all the emerging anarcho bands of the time. Within weeks we were offered the Poison Girls spot on the Crass tours... a phone call from Steve Ignorant filling me in on the details. We'd met a few times as I'd travelled to see Crass play pretty much all over the country. This led to quite a bit of jealousy amongst the ranks. Conflict had their eye on that spot. We as a band also came under lots of criticism as a Crass clone band, which we clearly weren't. Our time with Crass is pretty well documented, the gigs, vinyl etc. Our personal interactions have always remained within the family unit so to speak. I never really felt comfortable at Dial House - the home they all shared. It felt claustrophobic to me. It was like going to an old aunt's house where you were on your best behaviour. Crass created or at least spearheaded a movement, shaped a generation and opened peoples eyes to politics in a way no other had done.

There was Dirt.... We were the kids that Crass adopted! With us came a whole new range of issues. Aged between fourteen and twenty, we were full of questions, anxiety, frustration and the biggest of all, mine and Deno's domestic life! On the surface we were hungry for the new beginnings but underneath we were fuelled by personal issues that we were more than happy to deal with in public! Crass tours took on the role of keeping me and Deno apart. Crass had to develop parenting skills, fast! We brought a different dimension to Crass gigs, more of a 'human element/we can fuck up' side that drew us close to lots of new people during that time. I remember Deno making and wearing a yellow dress (I was appalled) but Gee embraced it as it matched a banner they had made. She promptly added a design to it so we matched. Eve Libertine used Deno's blue hair colour - Deno went mental! It was clear that Crass and Dirt were good for each other! I think later on we saw ourselves as the Carry On team of anarcho punk. (Deno as Barbara Windsor and naturally I saw myself as Sid James). Once we accepted that we were able to move on.

I am sure you are aware of your cult status, how does that feel to know that you had strong influence then and now?

My personal cult status? I assumed that was a predictive text thing on my mobile phone.

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The importance of Dirt in the scheme of things...I can't really comment. It was my life, what I did. In hindsight and I use this word a lot, it probably fucked me up way more than I can imagine. It created my character, shaped my ego and set boundaries I can't escape. It set me up to be judged by people I've never met. My one saving grace is humour, the ability to be sarcastic comes as second nature. I've worn black clothes for 38 years. I once put on a green shirt and got paranoid (sadly true). When Dirt first started we had a set of morals, principles, guidelines that just seemed to feel right. I became vegetarian in 1979 and proud to say I've never strayed from that path. I spent years arguing, persuading, trying to correct lifestyles I thought were wrong. Encouraging others to be more like me. Anti war, anti government and I still hold those values (who wouldn't)? But now I keep my mouth shut and let the kids of today say their piece. Personally I think I helped make the world a better place by being part of a movement that was clearly motivated. Sadly I don't see that anymore. The powers that be have seen their shortfalls and closed the ranks.

I heard that you nearly brought down the government (current news via the BBC)? I brought down a few relationships and closed a pub. I'll withhold the details in case the guy who lost his finger realises who I am.

There is very little live footage of the band, do you wish there was more? No. I've thought about it, because of all the modern technology available now and I think it would just be too dated and lifeless. Dirt were a live band for the people who were in the room at the time. A bad video can ruin the memory. I do wish there were more photos. None of us had cameras and there are some really bad photos floating around. No one could afford to take twenty-four pictures and get them developed just to hope they were

Photograph: Gazzer’s own

good.

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QUESTION: What have you been doing since the DIRT days and what are your current projects?

I don't think I could sum up twenty odd years in a sentence! There ’ s been a lot going on, mostly out of the public eye. On a musical note: In 1997 I formed the Stratford Mercenaries, fronted by Steve Ignorant (Crass). We had a couple of albums and a 7", toured the USA, Europe & Japan. It was three years of fun, a little bit of hard work but ultimately I think as a band were wanting different things, and personal issues kicked in. It fell apart in 2000.

I then headed to New York. Met an Israeli girl who became the mother of my four children and we settled back in London. So I've spent the last 11 years going completely fucking insane.

However there is a light at the end of the tunnel musically. About a year ago I started to write lyrics and have been recording some demos with the intention of forming a band. Fingers crossed this project will see the light of day very soon.

Out of the public eye... I like Kung Fu, I am a Land Rover mechanic, web designer, parent and an above av-

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Photograph: Gazzer’s

All photos , DIRT in the early days

erage, run of the mill human being!


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Photograph: Gazzer’s


Brighton Arts Club in the community Every inch of space at BAC is put to good use and we support three permanent resident artists at the club who may otherwise find it difficult to gain access to affordable and reliable facilities. Chanson De Arbres is one our residents who has a long history of mental illness. She came to us one day having seen an advertisement on the club bicycle (we use bicycles as sign posts) and has been with us ever since.

‘I have been painting since before I started nursery school, over sixty years. ’

Chanson ’ s paintings are inspired by light, wind and colour on landscapes and she de-

Above, Chanson Des Arbres in the main gallery with some of her paintings.

scribes herself as a post modern impressionist. ‘Mental illness can cause serious depression which can affect my work, sometimes for long periods, as can insomnia which has plagued me all my adult life. Some artists find that medication hinders their work but I think it is possible to transcend that, or at least to limit it’

When asked what Brighton Arts Club had brought to her life,

Chanson replied:

’space, community, warmth and encouragement.’

ARTS RESIDENCIES AND APPLICATIONS FOR SUPPORTED STUDIO SPACE If you think you qualify for supported studio space or are interested in a residency at Brighton Arts Club please contact Pasha du Valentine via email: brightonartsclub@hotmail.co.uk or arrange an appointment to visit the club.

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Poetry from Open Mic

London Road I ’ ve watched this re-run a thousand times It ’ s of my battered half decomposing canvas vans, defiantly stumbling along the paving stone paradigms and the concrete vertebrae ’ s that underlines our lives. Its the rusty pulmonary artery that vines like poison ivy and insists its abyss on the drunken monoliths resting in their doorway crypts I never stopped to think as I flick my half smoked cutters choice cigarette that the cracks and the grit that I ’ ve been beating down since I was a kid have become my scars tattooed graffiti upon my heart and the magnitude of the lack of ornate venetian masks leaving nothing to hide the sins, the crack heads, the fag-ends and sick. and the postulating reason In every junkie screaming treason upon his drunken girlfriend while passers by drunk there heads in cohesion its adhesion to my normality ceases me makes me feel homely because this is my home these streets walk me and it leave me feeling free the dirt and the shit that pounds beneath my feet lets me know that I am here I am alive and I ’ d chose no other place to feel this than none other than dirty old Brighton town

Come Down Blues

-

Spat from the swirling ugly gut of the ocean, Left cold and screaming as we lay in the wake of improbable regurgitation I feel now as I did then stuck in a rut of peaceful frustration, Lost and forgotten as the hooded generation Burnt out and stoned as we squint for salvation and as the hanging vale of a rushed out brain rest softly in an empty head that ’ s going insane, only smoking to break up the strain, so fucked up tired of feeling no pain. -Ben Ford. Open mic 79


Poetry from Open Mic

Colours of the World The real revolution won't happen while there's blood in the air. Shot from a man's face, a red cloud flashes and then stains the earth. Evil, deliberate death trickling down into the roots of the flora. Poppies rise. The sun rises in the East...

Technology goes as far as we, or intelligent life, makes it. Yellow sparks shot from bad wiring in every home, made that way so the occupants have to buy it all again. So we'll never really progress, because we are cheap and single minded. Where is the Queen...

I'll never love myself while there's a right way to live. Blue skies, endless forever, while on my level other people confuse the open land and build seemingly endless fences through it all, creating routes and pathways and 'best ways to go'. How do they know? And in the end, it's all just white or black. You either look at it, or you don't. But after all, something's there. Whether the light is on, or off.

-Cleary Mallard

Poem Will call this poem The great new beginning So far during this battle I do seem to be winning

The journey was long and dark Through sickness and through sin Out of the frying pan I can have my life begin

Full of hope Filled with love and affection Now it is the right time To go off in a positive direction

New opportunities now exist 80

Flourishing with a new found spark

The resilience comes back to me My life is no longer so dark

The joys of life As I spring into gear No longer cursed with pain Or living filled with fear

The journey will continue Positive as the new day Fills me with joy To my new found free way

-Steven Cowley


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Brogue’s Resident Agony Aunt Miss Scarlet

gives our readers a few home truths.

Dear Miss

Expect candour not kindness

Scarlet, I am a 21 year old female student and I have fallen in love with my male art lecturer at uni who is gay. I am considering gender reassignment. Is this a step too far? A: If the first of January was the line, you ’ ve leapfrogged right into an outdoor pool in the middle of July at some trustafarians weekend ‘rave ’ in the back of his parents house. You ’ re obviously fixating on someone you can ’ t have as a way of projecting on your relationship with your cold, authoritarian distant father. My advice? Find an open minded boyfriend your own age who doesn ’ t find your nether regions less sexy than a flick through Chatroulette at 4am on a Monday morning and create some student/teacher role play scenes. Most boys at university are just so excited to see a woman naked he ’ ll let you dress him up and call him whatever you want. This is why they are so popular with just about everyone other than their female peers. Which brings me to my next question…

Dear Miss Scarlet, I am a 51 year old artist and have developed a fetish for young male models. My family think it is despicable but I feel that as long as they are over 16 it is not a problem. I was just wondering if you have any contacts as I am running out of models. A: Ah, I am so glad to see that my reputation precedes me. There are lots of fabulous ways to get a high and constant turnover of young men to cater to your new found fetish for the younger flesh. There’ s the honest; putting up frank and to-the-point profiles on dating sites referring to yourself as either a cougar, if you are female seeking the narcotic effects of that new boy smell or a chickenhawk if you are a gay male seeking the same. There’ s the not so honest – putting an add somewhere asking for young hot men for a great new band you ’ re putting together. (hinting of course that there ’ s already a deal with MTV for a reality TV show – thus creating a great excuse for constantly filming them getting changed in the dressing room) Bands have a great turn over and you sleeping with them all is sure to create ‘artistic differences ’ that ensure you ’ re not stuck with the same young boy that you had last week. Then of course there ’ s always the down right creepy but much faster approach of waiting outside the college gates with a big bag of marijuana. For your own safety I recommend ID-ing first. 90


Dear Miss Scarlet, I have been a struggling artist for many years. Recently my cat knocked some water over and then stepped through the pallet making beautiful patterns over one of my canvases. The piece sold for more than any of my other works. Since then my cat has made 20 such works which sold at highly inflated costs and we can now live in relative luxury. The problem is that she has turned into some kind of diva and refuses to paint unless I buy her treats and let her sleep in my bed. She has also refused to paint if I go out. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. Please help me.

A: Do what any good manager would do and get that artist hooked on the high grade catnip. Everyone knows artists do their best work when totally whacked out of their minds or shaking with such velocity that the painting paints itself. As long as you have the cat nip you have the control.

Dear Miss Scarlet, recently while making love to a new girlfriend, I bragged that I was the inventor of the Rampant Rabbit. To be honest I thought it was a one night stand but since then we seem to have really bonded. Now she asks me loads of questions like how I came up with the idea, did I do tests for the manufacture, if I have new models planned? More recently she has started telling her friends and even her mother who now looks at me in a different and slightly worrying light. I am so scared of getting caught and want to come clean but I fear that everyone will hate me without the rabbit.

A: Quickly and whilst keeping up the façade spend every penny you have on a huge proposal, engagement and wedding (as speedily and spectacularly as possible but without her ever meeting any of your family friends.) I ’ m assuming as you have to lie about your life ’ s accomplishments that you haven ’ t got much in the way of assets, telling her you find pre-nups ghastly and unromantic can only help to speed things along. Ensure your lives become as intertwined as is possible. Then one night when she asks about the rabbit by name, just say; did you just say the Rampant Rabbit? I’m the inventor of the ‘Rampant habit.’ The far lesser known but big in, Kazakhstan, educational cartoon about how bad habits can take over your whole life. You know she won’ t remember but will be too embarrassed to ask at later date. This excuse is sufficiently boring so that she is guaranteed to never ask to see it. There is no doubt in my mind that after finding out that you are no longer the stud muffin, vibrating cock star, pioneer to the female orgasms of today she will lose all interest in you, not only

sexually but also as a human being.

However her need to not look like a fame

hungry harlot teamed with her new found

fear that YOU in fact may inherit half of

everything she owns and the pure effort

it would take to split up might just keep

her there. Bored, miserable and unim-

pressed… just like any other married couple. Enjoy.

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BRIGHTON

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ARTS CLUB

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Thank you to everyone who has made the club what it is today. I couldn't have done it without you and I am looking forward to another year. Love Pasha x� 95


Brighton Arts Club Members 2014 Some members have chosen to maintain anonymity, we respect that choice.

Pasha du Valentine -Artist and founder Spirit de la Mare -Manager and EditorIn Chief Brogue Magazine Skye de la Mare –Promotions Yve de la Mare– Business woman and model Mya Cohen– Photographer Amelia Thomas– Photographer Chanson des Arbres– Artist Robyn Fenn– Artist Emily Gould-White– Artist Julian Samuel– Web design Alice Purnell OBE– Poet and author Joel Boardman– Poet in Residence Thomas Wolfe– Performance Poet Karen Withecomb– Poet Ade Sluzky– Film maker and Writer Jamie Blackett– Illustrator and Journalist Tom Gibbs– DJ Natty Rasamarai Irie– DJ Yuliya Yurchenko– Senior lecturer Mark Meilack—Musician Paul Walker– Saxaphonist Jack Stephenson-Oliver - Pianist Stephen Singleton– Musician StevieZe Suicide– Musician Gazzer DIRT– Musician Nickolas Curry– Musician Mark Charles– Fashion designer Susan Diamond– Fashion designer Khanyisa Twani - singer Ben Cormack - pianist Will Lynch - Guitarist Alex Wheeler - Bass player Conor Bailey - Drummer Robin Porter - Saxophonist Livvy Lynch - singer Olivia Rosenthall - singer Carolyn Ailsa– Dancer Betty Nails– Performer Chaz John Ross– Musician Della Griffiths– Artist Gary Bilclough– Musician Alex nuns-misician 96


Spirit de la Mare in the members lounge at Brighton Arts Club 2014

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Brogue Magazine