WRITING YOUR VOWS HOW DO YOU SAY “I DO”? Writing your own vows can be a loving and beautiful expression of how you feel for each other and help personalize your wedding ceremony. If you’re feeling a case of writer’s block however, you are not alone. Check our guidelines to help make your wedding words perfect.
sources! Read poetry, love stories, even great romantic movies. Jot down anything that you think captures your feelings and use them! Go back and take a look at some of your favourite authors, including childhood favourites, or grab a bowl of popcorn and watch The Notebook.
First things first, talk to your officiant. Make sure it is okay for you to write your own vows. Some religions do not allow any variation on traditional wedding vows. Once you have gotten the go-ahead, keep in touch with them and let them in on your progress. Your officiant may raise questions or objections to your wording, or have some great contributions you wouldn’t have thought of.
You and your honey may think of yourselves as non-traditional and unconventional, but keep in mind that traditional wedding vows have endured for a reason. These words are not just moving reflections on the meaning of commitment and love; they are emblems of the ceremony’s public nature and a way of link married folks. Read over the standard vows for your religion(s) or faith(s) and see if anything strikes a chord with you.
Decide if you will work alone or together on your vows. If you do choose to go at it alone, run them by each other before the big day, or a trusted loved one if you want to keep them a total surprise. Keep them to the same length; you don’t want one of you with ten words and the other rambling for ten minutes. If you choose to do it together, try putting in a mutual vow that you both take.
Eventually, you will have to put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard). Gather everything you have collected and get to work. Words that should come to mind and appear in your vows are words like respect, love, cherish, commit, support and promise. Your vows should be serious about the marriage commitment, but they can be funny and warm.
The best self-written vows are highly personal with some vivid and heartfelt details. When was the first time you used the word love? Think about your most tender memories of each other. List the qualities you most admire and the wonderful things they bring out in you. Incorporate that into your vows.
Don’t make your vows so personal that no one but the two of you can understand them. You want the emotions and experiences you touch on to be universal. You have invited guests witness your bond, and you don’t want them thinking they need subtitles to understand the ceremony.
Don’t be afraid to borrow from other
Just because your wedding vows are
“You want your chosen words to pack a punch and they should reflect how you feel.” the most important part of the ceremony, doesn’t mean they should be long-winded. You want your chosen words to pack a punch and they should reflect how you feel. Your vows are for you and your honey but make sure to practice them out loud so you identify any problem areas like tongue twisters and sentences that run on (you don’t want to run out of breath!). These words will be heard by the entire wedding, and you want them to be perfect. If you think you can memorize your vows, go for it! However, don’t be afraid to cheat if you think you will draw a blank (as most nervous couples do). Have a copy ready to read from or have your officiant read them for you to repeat. You won’t want to be pulling a sheet of paper from your gown or jacket pocket, so this is another duty you can assign to the maid/matron of honour and the best man. Have them hold on to your copy until the moment arrives.
Published on Jun 17, 2009
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