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In nature, there is balance – and in every community you’ll find givers and takers and "givers and receivers" Are YOU a “giver” or a “taker”? (And how can you know?) Before you answer – consider neither extreme is sustainable - therefore we all need to understand the power, value and balance of "giving and receiving”. Being able to give is a sign that you not only acknowledge and care about the needs of others, but that you also are prepared to help. However…! If you are a "perpetual" giver - while you may have the admirable quality of being aware of and sensitive to the needs of others you will not know the difference between providing others with the "fish" they need to eat – and the need for teaching them "how to fish."
And also, if you are a perpetual giver, you will be taken advantage of, end up with nothing left to give and be burned out, physically, financially, emotionally and spiritually. Furthermore, those to whom you give will see no further value in you, turn on you and abandon you. Perpetual takers are perpetual "predators" who feed off unsuspecting perpetual givers. If you find yourself on the path of the perpetual giver and finally realize that you are merely consuming yourself to perpetuate the takers, you will do well to change your path before it is too late. Rather, appreciate the importance of saying “no” more often, give more time
to yourself and take the path of a "giver and receiver" that both mind and body may be refreshed and renewed and that your spirit of giving may be sustained. We all also need to understand the importance and value of receiving. Many times in life's journey we all have needs that we cannot meet. Far from being a failure, being willing to receive in times of need is a sign that not only do you acknowledge that you (we) all need others from time to time, but that life's journey is also teaching you the value of giving and receiving. Therefore, when you are able, give of yourself and your time to others who genuinely need, so that they too may learn to receive and then likewise be encouraged to give. However, if you are a perpetual "taker" you will be constantly taking advantage of others. You believe that the world, everybody and everything owes you a living.
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You will be unable and unwilling to care about anything or anyone but yourself. You will be indifferent to the needs, suffering and pain of others (maybe even the needs of those closest to you) or of the needs of your community. As a taker you may also be or become an aggressive, abusive person (at least mentally if not even also physically) and someone else will always be to blame or be set up to take the “rap” for you if something goes wrong. As a taker, you may even be disguised as a giver – one who claims to be “doing many good things” and pretending that you really care. However, your motives will be of total self-interest, and eventually, when tested, your true spirit will be revealed as you abandon others with the spoils of your deceit. And if you are found out, or threatened, you will turn on others, abuse and accuse and even hate. Eventually, however, you will have burned all of your bridges, be incapable of love for anything or anyone but yourself and become totally selfish and bearing an ugly spirit of constant criticism. Furthermore you will eventually become so totally selfish that you will not even
be able to recognize that you are a taker. If you consider yourself to be a “giver” then you must always be prepared to accept one hard fact of life – and this is something that many givers simply find too hard to accept.
Now - we all need to understand and apply a basic law of sustainability "giving and receiving". It applies not only to relationships but also to the earth itself. “As the earth gives its best to us, if we are not prepared to give back to the earth, eventually it too will end up with nothing left to give and we will perish like a plague of consuming locusts which takes everything in its path.” That is the number one “law” of sustainability for mankind – and it is the foundation upon which all true and sustainable economy should exist.
When it comes to hardened, perpetual takers - they cannot be trusted, they cannot be believed, they cannot be “reasoned” with and most important – YOU will NEVER change them with reason and persuasion. Change, for them, is only something that can come from them and this rarely happens. Their word is empty rhetoric as they will say what is convenient and very soon turn on you and devour you like a smiling crocodile sizing up its next meal. If you are a perpetual giver and do not heed this warning – then you are likely to be betrayed – severely.
Unfortunately, the system of economics which man has “invented” in defiance of nature is oblivious to or indifferent to the everencroaching deadly consequences. To understand this in simple terms, review my articles titled: “The Parable of the Ponds” and “Economic LCD” (and others) available in the Community Gold Shop of my website. As we know, for too long now, mankind has been “taking” unsustainably from the earth – consuming resources uncontrollably, which belong to future generations. In the process, polluting and destroying the land, rivers and oceans,
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polluting the air, destroying our forests, which are the “lungs” of the earth – and using the illusion of wealth (debt) to pretend that we can rape as much of the earth as we want, now, and to hell with the future, so far as many are concerned. If we live only for what we can get or take, we take from ourselves and from others. The end result is spiritual void and loneliness, because when we have burned all our bridges others will avoid us.
(And I’m not referring only in monetary terms.) How much do you give of yourself- your time - your energy - your gifts - in fact your collective resources and in so doing, what impact has it had on you, your relationships and those closer to you. Has your perpetual giving actually put you in a positon where you are constantly taken advantage of?
If we live only to give, we also only take from ourselves and from others. The end result is still spiritual void and loneliness, because others will abandon us when we have given all we have. Just one more extremely important thing…. perpetual givers do so by nature. They are caring people and it is not easy to modify this wonderful attribute and become “less giving” – in fact it is extremely difficult. So just how much do you “give” and at what cost?
in genuine need of your help, and someone who has proven to be a consistent taker – one who simply takes your giving nature for granted or even preys on your good nature. If you realize that you are a perpetual giver and want to change, yes, you will likely find it is extremely hard to do so, because this wonderful character trait is likely built into your DNA. But learning to say “no” more often and finding the balance between giving and receiving, will ensure that you can go on giving and become much more fulfilled in doing so. Therefore, the beauty of wisdom is balance.
At the other extreme, perpetual takers also do so by nature. If by chance you recognize that trait in yourself, it won’t be easy to change. First, you must genuinely want to do so - but when you do, it can be a lifechanging experience.
When we both give as we are able and receive as we need, we are giving life (to each other and to the earth itself) as we are actually helping to sustain our earth, others and thereby ourselves. The end result is positive spiritual enlightenment as part of a true sense of caring personal, family and Community Regeneration.
There is a big difference between giving to someone
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Are YOU a “giver” or a “taker”? (And how can you know?)