Banana-costumed Man Has Little Appeal
BLITZ News Shorts 3 Hollywood Profile/Movie Review 4 Music: The Killdares 5 Rangers/UFC 118 Preview 6 Stafon Johnson Battles On 7 COVER STORY: NFL Cheerleader Preview The Best of The Best 9-11 BLITZ BABE: Jenna 12 Food Review: Sushi Sam 14 Blitz Toys 15 The Fan Top 10 with Sybil 16 Crossword / Jokes / Horrorscopes 17 Last Call: Looking For A New Job 18
PUBLISHER Kelly G. Reed EDITOR Jennifer Wayne CREATIVE DIRECTOR / WEBSITE / GRAPHIC DESIGN Damien William Mayfield COVER Special Thanks to the Dallas Cowboys Special Thanks to the Houston Texans Cover Design: Damien William Mayfield STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS Darryl Briggs, Gregg Case, Nathaniel Chadwick, Kent Gilley, Tim Gravens, Steven Hendrix, Matt Pearce, Jason Ryan, Ed Westerman CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Keith Allison, Jorge Alverez, Erick Anderson, Denis Bancroft, Sherri Barber, Matt Bowen, Derek Bridges, Brian Garman, Shawn Hubbard, Aaron Huey, Jamie Koslow, Paul Ladd, Mihe Nowah, Emery Way STAFF WRITERS Tony Barone, Geoff Case, Vivian Fullerlove, Robin George, Eric Kendall, Frank LaCosta, Pat Moran, Richard S. Pollak, Craig Smith, Jennifer Wayne and Jesse Whitman CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Brian Beard, Jason Brewton, Andrew J. Hewett, Jon Sullivan, Sybil Summers, Ed Westerman ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Kelly G. Reed CONTACT US MAIN NUMBER 214-529-7370 FAX NUMBER 972-960-8618 email@example.com BLITZ Weekly P.O. Box 295293, Lewisville, TX 75029
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Photo Courtesy: Keith Allison, Derek Bridges
VOL. 2 - ISSUE 52
August 25 - 31, 2010 3
QUOTE OF THE WEEK “You’re never guaranteed about next year. People ask what you think of next season; you have to seize the opportunities when they’re in front of you.” -- Brett Favre
A man in a banana costume is accused of exposing himself and brandishing a shotgun while riding around with a bunch of friends in Washington state. The Clallam County sheriff’s office says the 21-year-old was arrested last Tuesday evening for investigation of indecent exposure and reckless endangerment. The Peninsula Daily News reports police first received a report of the costumed man exposing himself at a restaurant. Sheriff’s Sgt. Randy Pieper says they also drove through a Port Angeles neighborhood where the man got out brandishing the gun. After his arrest, authorities say, the man couldn’t explain why he was costumed. The other man also was arrested, but an 18-year-old woman in the car was allowed to split. The banana costume was seized as evidence.
Andrew J. Hewett
HE QUALIFIES AS LAUGHINGSTOCK OF HIS CELL BLOCK
Police Call ‘Ma’ on Dropped Cell Phone
Thanks a lot, Mom. Police seeking a man accused of breaking into an elementary school said they identified the suspect by calling “Ma” from the contact list of a cell phone he dropped as he fled. A police report said officers responding to an alarm at an elementary school in Athens in northeast Georgia arrived in time last Monday to see a man running through the cafeteria and out the back door. Police failed to catch the man, but say he dropped his cell phone as he ran. According to the report, officers picked up the phone, searched the contact list and called a number marked “Ma.” They say a woman who answered gave them her son’s name.
Police Warn Man Against Undressing While Driving
A driver who tried to change his sweaty clothes while driving through a Milwaukee suburb was stopped by police but let off with a warning. Police said that when they pulled the 54-year-old over in Brookfield on August 13, he complained he was uncomfortable in his clothes because he had spent a sweltering day at the Wisconsin State Fair. The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reported that police warned the man against indecent exposure and advised him to finish changing at home.
Monday, July 26, 2010, Nathan Wayne Pugh, 49, entered a Wells Fargo Bank in Dallas demanding cash, swearing on a poorly written note he had a “bom” inside his Whataburger bag. The recently hired teller told Pugh she’d need an I.D. …so he gave her both his Texas I.D. and Wells Fargo debit card. When he demanded $2,000, the still tender teller explained she had only $900 in her drawer, so he took it. Heading for the door, this Jesse James wannabe saw a policeman and …using a choke hold, overpowered a woman holding an infant in her arms. But the woman, fearing for the child, began hitting Pugh, and beating Pugh, until police pulled her off to arrest him.
TEACHERS DETERMINED TO “RAISE” MORE THAN GRADES
The Associated Press reported August 7, 2010, the MTEA (Milwaukee Teachers’ Education Association) was fighting to get its taxpayer-funded Viagra back, claiming gender discrimination because erectile dysfunction was only suffered by male teachers. But lawyers for the Milwaukee School Board claimed no discrimination, claiming erectile dysfunctional drugs were primarily for recreational sex and not out of medical necessity.
4 August 25 - 31, 2010
HOLLYWOOD PROFILE with Paul Walker
by: Vivian Fullerlove “Entertainment’s Real Critic”
All star cast…check! Action, action and more action…check! A total guy’s guy movie… check! Lots of eye candy for the wives and girlfriends…check and check! I had the pleasure of attending the recent red carpet screening of the film Takers starring every really hot guy in Hollywood, and I gotta tell you, this is just a good, old fashioned entertaining movie. Perfect summer fare! The film is about a somewhat eclectic group of guys who make their living robbing banks. I caught up with one of the film’s stars, Paul Walker, who talked about the film and sharing the set with one of the most iconic film characters in movie history. There is a certain honor and code among these guys in spite of the fact that they are at the core a bunch of thieves. The rule is, I guess, the more frequently you play with fire, the better chance you have of getting burned. So these guys would only pull one job a year and give things time to cool off before they would even begin to entertain pulling another job. So what entices them to go against the code? The job they’ve always wanted to pull off that they were just so close to being capable of pulling off, but there was just always something or for some reason they would fall short. It’s finally all come together just immediately after pulling off a really successful job; so, they get suckered into it. There were some pretty heavy hitters in this film. What was it like around the set with all that star power? I think people that are born, bred and raised here (in LA where the film was shot) want to be cool about it and say, “Hey it’s business as usual. There’s a film crew over there.” But the kid in all of us still can’t help but get a little excited, and inquiring minds want to know. People would get all fired up when they found out that Chris Brown or T.I. or Hayden Christensen was around the corner. I got a few times, “Hey, you mean Anakin is over there?” He’ll never be able to live that down. How do you deal with all the attention? I like it. This is movieland, right here. Well, I liked this movie. You can check it out and decide for yourself this week when the film opens nationwide. Takers is rated PG-13 for intense action sequences, some violence and language. For all of this week’s new releases and more of your favorite celebs, check out my show Reel Critics on Time Warner Cable Video on Demand under the North Texas Programming tab!
by: Jon Sullivan
“I’d buy that for a dollar!”
Piranha 3D With Hollywood doing its absolute hardest to push 3D as the future of film, it’s always nice to see a filmmaker use it for what it is: a gimmick. An impressive gimmick for sure, but a gimmick nonetheless. Alexandre Aja’s new film Piranha 3D doesn’t try to take itself too seriously; in fact, I think that may be an understatement. Throwing out all semblances of coherence and character development, it relies on gore and over the top visuals to maintain the viewer’s attention span. Does it work? Yes, it does. Is it worth paying the ridiculously inflated 3D price to see it? No way. There’s a lot to enjoy here if you’re a fan of camp and gore. Jerry O’Connell overacts like his comeback depends on it as the movie’s version of Joe Francis (known here as Derrick Jones). Scenery chewing does not even begin to cover it. Christopher Lloyd emerges out of whatever hole he’s been hiding in for what amounts to a cameo, but what a cameo it is; his explanation of what these mysterious vicious piranha are is the funniest thing in this movie. He doesn’t even try…it’s just Christopher Lloyd channeling his Doc Brown zaniness and it’s excellent. Outside of that…well, it’s what you’d expect from a B-movie. The acting
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is absolutely horrible, a somewhat main character disappears into thin air, the plot itself isn’t followed (especially the supposed romance between the two teenage leads which was absolutely unnecessary) and the characters are paper thin. Odds are, though, if you’re spending money to see a movie called Piranha 3D, that’s not what you want; you want gore. There’s plenty of it, over the top and super violent, but also old style. The big 10 minute scene of the piranhas attacking the spring break party was a thing of absolute B-movie beauty; outside of the piranhas being CGI, the gore was all done with simple effects and as I raised myself on the work of Tom Savini, it was a joy to see. Spending the 15 dollars to see two actors ham it up and an excellent 10 minute piranha gorefest, though? I wouldn’t recommend it. Maybe back in the day when 3D wasn’t as expensive this would’ve worked, but since Hollywood wants to take the medium legit, movies like these that lack any substance aren’t worth the price of admission. If it comes out on DVD/Blu-ray with 3D glasses, though, definitely check it out. Just save your money at the cinema and pay off your car loan instead.
August 25 - 31, 2010 5 blitzweekly.com
by: Ed Westerman
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
2. Closer Than You Know
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
3. Hold My Heart
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
4. Long Island High
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
7. Along Came You
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
8. Secrets of the Day
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
10. Perfect Accident
The Killdares – Secrets of the Day
MUSIC: The Killdares 1. Seasons
New Vision (exhibit) Crow Collection of Asian Art – Dallas Il Lee is a New York artist who for over 30 years has been drawing and painting in his chosen medium of ball point pen.
eltic-Rock? What they heck is that? Sounds like a K-Tel Super-Hits compilation from the ‘70s like “Disco Rocket,” “Canadian Gold,” or “Funky Music Machine.” Or maybe an aural, oxymoron? A short-lived attempt at musical gimmickery, perhaps? None of the above if you’ve seen The Killdares at any point in the last decade and a half. The Killdares? Not a gimmick, not a cover band and certainly not the aforementioned “short-lived attempt at musical gimmickery.” The Killdares? A collection of world-class musicians who have shaped a unique sound out of their appreciation for traditional Irish music--and the use of fiddle and bagpipes-and blended it with the basics of a hard-rock band: drums, bass and guitar. The Killdares? Tim Smith: founder of the band in 1996, drummer and lead vocalist (in fact, Fred LeBlanc of Cowboy Mouth sounds a lot like him); Roberta Rast: backing vocals, Ukelele and six-time National Fiddle Champion; Matt Willis: Highland Bagpipes, Scottish Smallpipes, Uilleann Pipes, electronic pipes, backing vocals, flute, whistles, samples; Brek Lancaster: lead guitar and backing vocals; and, currently, Gavin Kelso on bass.
Meatloaf House of Blues – Dallas 100.3 Jack FM Presents Meat Loaf with special guest Pearl. Show starts at 8 p.m. For more information, call (214) 978-2583.
Twenty7 Grand Opening Event Plano Plano’s newest sports bar is pulling out all the stops for their grand opening. There will be a classic car show, free give aways, live dj, the Patron Girls, the Twenty7 Girls and much more!
Check out their website for everything you need to know about the band: www.killdares.com, including show schedule and the fact that they are a mainstay at the State Fair of Texas (for eleven years running!) and in fact playing twenty-four days of The Fair from September 24 to October 17. Slàinte, indeed!
Dallas Comic Con Richardson Civic Center Admission is only $10 Doors open at noon and you’ll get to meet Luciana Carro from Battlestar Galactica. Lots of comics, collectibles and cool stuff!
Since 1996, The Killdares have toured extensively and put out a steady stream of original releases starting with Broken with a Word (1998), A Place to Stand (2001), LIVE (2002), Any Given Element (2005) and, most recently, the Grammy-nominated Secrets of the Day (2008). The pictures here are from a recent show at the Granada Theater, where they did a live DVD shoot, which is set to be released in late September. The audience members were asked to film portions of the show with whatever device they had on-hand, and to submit that footage for inclusion in the final product. It was a great experience to be part of, and the DVD when released should be a great addition to any collection. However you hear them, live or recorded, they are at once hard-rocking and haunting, simultaneously happy yet melancholy. The live shows are energetic and fun for all ages, even though the one’s “of age” is most-likely getting their Guinness on.
The Tom Landry Classic Southern Methodist University The Tom Landry Classic is one of the premier high school football events in the country and the largest high school sporting event in Texas. Annually, this doubleheader showcases four of the region’s top high school teams. Gates open at 3:30 p.m. Game one puts the Everman Bulldogs against the Highland Park Scots. Game two is the Allen Eagles versus Cedar Hill Longhorns.
Oak Cliff Artists for Inaugural Juried Art Exhibition Oak Cliff Cultural Center Oak Cliff continues to get hipper. Check out the new center and this exhibition that highlights recent work of professional visual artists who live or work in Oak Cliff.
Photos Courtesy: Ed Westerman/www.edwesterman.com
Sailing on Lake Ray Hubbard The Hilton - Rockwall Do something romantic. The Seawolf sails out of Bella Harbor on the eastern shore of Lake Ray Hubbard. Seawolf is docked near the lighthouse in front of the Hilton. Cruises are $25 per person.
If you know of a cool event or concert coming up, send some info our way at firstname.lastname@example.org
Photo Courtesy: Matt Pearce
6 August 25 - 31, 2010
RANGERS:News Rough on the Road
by: Craig Smith
“Sportsologist” - email@example.com
The first place Texas Rangers just completed as the ace on this team. In his last start a rough road trip. They started last week in against Baltimore, he pitched 8 2/3 innings, Tampa Bay where they were swept in three struckout 12, and only gave up three hits. games. They then went Neftali Feliz, at age 22, to Baltimore where they became the youngest split going 2-2. They player in MLB history have a few key guys out to have 30 saves in a with injuries but that is season. Lefty Michael no excuse to be playing Kirkman, who was as poorly as they have. called up last week from With the commanding Oklahoma City, got his lead they have in first taste of the bigs the A.L. West, they last Saturday pitching in should be distancing relief. He struck out the themselves and sealing first three batters and the division. Every team got his fourth batter out goes through a slump C.J. Wilson needs to be dominant for the Rangers. before being replaced. at some point in the Rich Harden gets one season so hopefully they are getting theirs more chance this week to show he can help out of the way before October. The good this team. I was in Oklahoma City for his news is that despite their poor play they last rehab start where he looked impressive still have an 8.5 game lead as of Tuesday with 10 strikeouts, three walks, and only morning. three hits. Once the Rangers get Nelson Cruz This week they return home to play and Ian Kinsler back, the offense will the Twins and then their division rival, the be back to scoring at will. The rest of the Oakland A’s. Look for them to get back in season and the playoffs are going to depend the win column this week and start to pull on the pitching. C.J. Wilson has emerged away in the division.
by: Brian Beard “Ultimate Fighter”
Demian Maia (12-2-0) vs. Mario Miranda (10-1-0):
Miranda is an up and coming fighter in the UFC with this being only his fourth time to fight in the big show. This cat has proven to be a pretty solid fighter but he will have his hands full with Maia. Very few true, pure Jiu Jitsu players are successful in today’s MMA world, but Maia is one of them. His submission game is incredible and he will no doubt go to it. If he can get this fight to the ground, he will put on a clinic and submit Miranda in the second round. If he doesn’t, he will get TKO’d in the first. I look for Maia by submission in the second.
Randy Couture (18-10-0) vs. James Toney (0-0-0): If you live under a rock and have not heard of this fight, it is actually the main draw for this card. Toney is a former pro boxer with great knockout power. He has also talked a lot of sh!t. In my opinion, this mofo needs a paycheck so he has run his mouth enough to get it. If you don’t know who Couture is, please go away. Most MMA fans give Toney no shot at all. In theory, I am right there with them, but remember that this is a fight and anyone has a punchers chance. Toney included. If Couture can close the distance and get inside without being KTFO, he will easily win this fight. If he gets clipped on the button, he will be sleeping. Couture is 47 and not at the top of his game, but I pick him to win by rear naked choke in the first round. Frankie Edgar
(12-1-0) vs. BJ Penn (15-6-1): This is an immediate rematch that I feel is 100% warranted. These two fought to a bullsh!t decision back in April. I felt that Penn clearly won the fight with his precise boxing. I think that he will show up with a chip on his shoulder for this one and will dominate Edgar. Edgar is no slouch and I am a fan but a motivated BJ Penn is SCARY! I think he will win every aspect of this fight this time. He will come out using his boxing and will be aggressive. If that doesn’t work by the end of round two, he will take it to the ground. I call Penn by TKO in the third. It may be submission but I’ve already picked two that way so I’ll go TKO. Also, anyone who laughed when I called Chael Sonnen to beat Silva, and bet against me…I bet you sh!t your pants for a little bit! Great composure and catch by the champ though!
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August 25 - 31, 2010 7
“Foxie and Fired Up”
Willamette Valley Medical Center in McMinnville. So to me this says the kids were overworked. Yet the doc doesn’t have the same conclusion as I do. “To have an epidemic like this is very weird,” Winkler said. Three of the players also were diagnosed with a rare soft-tissue condition called “compartment syndrome,” which caused soreness and swelling in their triceps. Five of the athletes were treated in the emergency room. The other 11 were admitted to the hospital to maintain adequate hydration and prevent kidney failure, he said. Okay so they were probably overworked AND dehydrated… yet school officials are still puzzled??? Officials said the cause is still a mystery (so they don’t want to admit that they hired Hitler as a coach), but high CK levels can result from vigorous exercise or the use of certain medications or food supplements. So nineteen boys all ingested the exact same medicine and food and had the same reaction? Sounds very unlikely, but who am I?
Give the Kids a Break I grew up in Dallas, so I understand the meaning of high school football. I had a cousin who grew up in Kentucky and she had no idea about the grand tradition of the mum at homecoming or the excitement of ESPN coming to your town to film a measly football game played between kids barely old enough to drive. Of course, this was years ago and I think the epidemic of high school football has spread out of our great state. I present to you Exhibit A… School officials remain puzzled over what caused 19 members of a high school football team in northwest Oregon to suffer muscle damage following a camp. Hmmm…muscle damage at a football camp. Could it possibly be they were pushed too hard? Surely not! Nineteen McMinnville High School players had elevated levels of the enzyme creatine kinase which is released by muscles when they’re injured, said Dr. Craig Winkler of
Before their symptoms started this past week, the players were at an immersion camp organized by first-year coach Jeff Kearin. Winkler said the players worked out last Sunday at the high school’s wrestling room, where temperatures reached 115 degrees. He said the high temperature and dehydration may have played a role. He also said officials will look at water sources and what the kids had to drink, including power mixes. I think we all need to realize that we have taken high school football to the extreme, making it more glorified than being book smart or excelling at a foreign language. Children are being forced to push their growing bodies to the extreme to make their parents in the stands proud (and reassure them that the thousands of dollars they are spending on uniforms, shoes and fees is well worth it). Of course, Superintendent Maryalice Russell told The Oregonian newspaper she doesn’t believe Kearin’s workout was excessive…because I am sure she was spotting the boys while they were bench pressing in the 100 degree heat.
by: Jennifer Wayne
MLB: Twins vs. Rangers Thur. August 26 – 7:05PM – Rangers Ballpark – FSSW The final game of the four game series looks to be a good one. The Twins send out 11 game winner Francisco Liriano. Yes that Liriano who earlier in life utterly dominated batters. He stills strikes out batters with ease so the Rangers hitters need to be patient. The Rangers send out Cliff Lee who needs to stay focused and maintain command of his pitches.
NFL: Cowboys vs. Texans
starter there for years after last year he became only the sixth player in NFL history to rush for over 2,000 yards in a season. Then again, it could allow Stafon Johnson to slowly ease back into the game as a backup. On August 15th, Stafon played his first preseason game against the Seattle Seahawks, who are ironically coached by his college coach Pete Carroll. He looked to be back in form as he broke a 17-yard run in his first two carries. His next run was a heartbreaker. On a short run, as he planted his right leg, a Seattle tackler landed on him causing his ankle to be severely dislocated and also broke his fibula. As the players and coaches kneeled to pray, you knew something bad had happened to him again. It was sad to see him carted off knowing everything he had overcome and in his first game he went down
NFL: Steelers vs. Broncos
again. He had surgery to put everything back where it belongs and is now out 8-12 weeks, but vows to be back better than before. He was waived a few days later, but Coach Jeff Fisher says the move was necessary and that they will reclaim him and put him on injured reserve. He will rehab at the Titans facility. Fisher says the team has not given up on him. I say, how could you? He has battled back before and I fully expect him to do it again.
Sun. August 29 – 7:00PM – Invesco Field – FOX Big Ben will be looking for some significant playing time. He’s about to ride the pine on suspension so expect an all out effort on his part. Sure, Kyle Orton might be the starter but expect to see plenty of “Jeebus Tebow.” Big Ben is the main reason the Broncos took Tebow. Diametrically apart united by football. Gotta love it.
MLB: Red Sox vs Rays Sun. August 29 – 7:05PM – Tropicana Field – ESPN The Red Sox just keeping hanging around like a bad rash. This is the final game of the three game set. If things go Boston’s way, they’ll still be contending for a Wild Card spot, if not; then they’ll be trying to play spoiler. John Lackey is on the mound for the BoSox with James Shields for the Rays. Two good pitchers face off!
Photo Courtesy: Matt Pearce
Stafon Johnson had finally overcome the obstacles and was in the NFL. A year earlier, he was in a horrific weight-lifting accident that could have ended his life. Last September, while a member of the USC football team, he was working out on the bench with 275 pounds. He somehow lost grip of the barbell and it landed on his throat crushing his larynx in the process. Most people with similar injuries end up having to use a feeding tube the rest of their lives…if they survive. He was a senior, so his college career was over. After surgery that left him unable to talk for two months, he was cleared medically to enter the NFL Draft. After going undrafted in this year’s draft, Johnson quickly signed with the Tennessee Titans. This wasn’t the best place to sign for a running back if he wanted to see the field. Chris Johnson will be the
Sat. August 28 – 7:00PM – Reliant Stadium – CBS The dress rehearsal for the Cowboys takes place on Saturday. This will be the most action that the starters will see in preseason. It’s time to work out the last of the remaining kinks. Questions still abound regarding the red zone offense, kicking game and the offensive line.
8 August 25 - 31, 2010
Photos Courtesy: Brian Garman, Dallas Cowboys, St. Louis Rams, Jorge Alverez
August 25 - 31, 2010 9
10 August 25 - 31, 2010
Photos Courtesy: Erick Anderson, Matt Bowen, Brian Garman, Jamie Koslow, Dallas Cowboys, Jorge Alvarez, Denver Broncos, Aaron Huey
August 25 - 31, 2010 11 blitzweekly.com
Photos Courtesy: Steven Hendrix
August 25 - 31, 2010 13
14 August 25 - 31, 2010
“Senior Sushi Authority”
Southlake Does Sushi Right!
Sushi Sam 500 West Southlake Blvd, #138 Southlake - 76092 • 817-410-1991
Follow the boulevard in Southlake a couple of miles west past the Town Square and you will find a world class sushi bar appropriately called Sushi Sam. It’s located in a small strip mall it shares with a taco stand and bakery along with a few small business establishments. Don’t let the mundane location keep you from making the trip or you will miss one of the best sushi stops in the metroplex.
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If you have tag-alongs who don’t fancy raw fish, not to worry, Sushi Sam is also a Japanese restaurant which sports all the traditional fare. But that’s not what brings in large local crowds each night of the week….it is all about the sushi. Sam’s Yakitori Bar has about two dozen sushi choices. Tops on this list are the Hamachi, which is the Yellow Tail Tuna. It is mild and extremely fresh. Don’t leave without sampling at least a few other items, notably eel, squid and octopus. If Maki Sushi and Special Rolls are your cravings, try the Spicy Tuna Roll and the Spider Roll which is a fried soft shell crab served with lettuce and avocado. The owners have created an extensive Specialty Roll menu. The Ahi Tuna Tower has fresh avocado piled high with tuna sashimi and crab mixed into a tasty sauce. It’s pricey, but nothing short of spectacular. Of the forty-something choices you will have, many of the selections features names with a local flair. The locals can’t get enough of the Dragon Roll named after the Southlake High School mascot is a Yellowtail roll with scallions and avocado outside and topped with shrimp. Other favorites are the Samurai Roll which is Yellowtail, Jalapeno and cucumber topped with salmon and a special chili sauce, and the Hawaii Roll featuring crabmeat and avocado topped with tuna. The Bento Box is nice if you stop by for lunch. The Tempura and Chicken Teriyaki are the favorites. They also have exceptional Udon, so if you aren’t in a fish mood, order the Chicken Udon. If it is just that you want your fish more on the cooked side, try the Salmon Teriyaki. If you are in the mood for an appetizer, try the tempurabreaded green beans with mayo-sriracha sauce or the rock shrimp accompanied by slightly sweet brown dipping sauce. Don’t worry, Sam has a nice list of sake and Japanese beers to wash the succulent rolls down with, as well as wine. After you are filled to the lid with sushi, be sure and hit the Town Square on your way home as there are plenty of exciting new establishments that have recently opened and ready to serve your every retail need and will allow you to walk off all those calories.
Take out, takes reservations, catering, private parties, kid-friendly
August 25 - 31, 2010 15 blitzweekly.com
We’ve written about keychain-sized multi-tools before, but never one that masquerades as an actual key. The KeyTool is so small, it fits over a standard key, offering three sizes of screwdriver, a bottle opener, wire cutter, tweezers, finger nail cleaner, and nail file, all contained within a strong stainless steel sheath. Great for impromptu handyman work or for carrying a host of tools onto a flight without getting harassed by the TSA. Price - $10
NES Hard Drives
Hide your precious data inside the unassuming casing of a video game classic with NES Hard Drives. Available in capacities up to 1TB, these 2.5-inch Toshiba drives feature USB interfaces, all stuck inside games like The Legend of Zelda, Metroid, or everyone’s favorite code-driven shoot ‘em up, Contra. Price - $130-$180
Nikon Coolpix S1100pj Projector Camera
Last year, Nikon released the S1000pj, the first point-and-shoot with a built-in projector. It was a little expensive, a little dim, but a really cool idea. The Nikon Coolpix S1100pj Projector Camera is the company’s second-generation pocketable projector cam, bringing improvements like a 40 percent brighter projector with a built-in stand, the ability to display the screen of a computer connected via USB, one-touch 720p movie recording, a 14.1-megapixel sensor, 5-way image stabilization, a 5x optical zoom lens and a 3-inch touchscreen. Boring your guests with family photos has never been so easy. Price - $350
Lifting Weights Safely By Jason Brewton
Texas Back Institute - www.texasback.com
ifting weights to achieve the best results and do so safely requires you have the right mindset. Most injuries, especially to the back, starts with the lifter’s approach. To correct these problems, you must understand your own body – your age, condition and body type. While many lifters understand their limitations, too many others are simply lifting too much weight and often with too few reps. Oftentimes, middle-aged lifters are trying to emulate what younger people can do. Other lifters make the mistake of working out on regimens more appropriate for well-conditioned athletes who have worked out daily for years under professional supervision. As a general rule, most lifters should lift in the range of 15-20 reps. If you’re only lifting 6-8 reps, you are probably lifting too much weight and run the risk of injury. Another problem leading to back injuries is lifting weights too fast. Let’s face it, most of us don’t need explosive power. And you’re not working the weights and the target muscles properly. Instead of fast-jerk motions, you should lift within a weight range that allows you to achieve a slow, methodical and controlled movement. Other injuries are caused by working beyond the fatigue point or working out with too much overlap of the muscle groups. While highly trained, experienced lifters can push their bodies further, the inexperienced and unconditioned lifter cannot do this safely and is prone to cheat technique.
Work not only your regimen up over time, tearing and rebuilding muscle tissues. During the workout, but also the length of time of the workout itself. you’ll feel lactic acid burn in the muscle you are workIf you’re a beginner, start with a simple, 15-min- ing. After the workout and on your days off for a muscle ute workout on your upper or lower muscle groups and group, you’ll feel delayed onset muscle soreness that will gradually work up to one-hour workouts, including both improve as you become a more experienced lifter. But not upper and lower if desired. Beginners should also start all pain is good. If you feel nagging pain that won’t reon machine weights where solve itself and hurts worse movement is controlled in during the workout, it’s time a fixed plane of motion and to have it checked out by a thus less prone to injury unphysician. If it’s a back issue, like free weights which reyou should see a spinal spequire more neuromuscular cialist. to control the weight. In fact, Lastly, don’t forget to we suggest most lifters will include cardiovascular exerbe well served and less prone cise in your workout routine. to injury by using machines Along with a stronger body, rather than free weights. you also need a stronger Another common misheart and overall improved take that can lead to injury body function. It can also Highly trained, experienced lifters can push their bodies further. is working only the muscles serve as a proper warm-up you can see such as the bifor weight lifting. If possible, ceps and chest. Always work the opposite muscle groups work under the supervision of a personal trainer who can equally – biceps then triceps, pectorals then middle trap, lead you through a successful weightlifting experience. etc. Working the upper body and lower body on different Your trainer can help you develop a regimen appropriate workout days will allow for proper rest and rebuilding of for your age, body type and condition and also oversee muscles. Don’t make the mistake of ignoring the lower your lifting technique. body and focusing solely on the upper body (or vice versa). This can lead to an imbalance in strength between the upper and lower body and result in over utilization of one or the other during functional activities leading to tissue injuries. With lifting, you will experience pain because you’re
By: Sybil Summers
Most Ridiculous Phobias 10. Chromatophobia: Fear of colors. I heard a rumor that David Duke suffers from this. 9. Phagophobia: Fear of swallowing. This joke just writes itself. 8. Ergophobia: Fear of work. Pretty sure most of the women on “Basketball Wives” are guilty of this. 7. Logophobia: Fear of words. Just plain weird. 6. Ephebiphobia: Fear of teenagers, a.k.a.: Get-off-mylawn-iopia. 5. Pentheraphobia: Fear of your mother-in-law. Ok, seriously, who doesn’t have this? 4. Sitophobia: Fear of food. Man, I wish I had this. 3. Geniophobia: Fear of chins. Obviously not supported by Jay Leno.
2. Arachibutyrophobia: Fear of butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. Dogs of the world unite. 1. Panophobia: Fear of everything. Including this list.
HORRORSCOPES Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) You may believe that God lives within every man, woman, and child, but the stars are pretty sure that’s just a tapeworm inside of you.
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) A terrible misunderstanding will lead dozens to believe that you’d do anything in your power to prevent no-good slacks from moving into the neighborhood.
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) After 15 years, four separate marriages, and the adoption of three foster children, your dream of assembling the world’s ultimate Family Feud team will finally become a reality.
Q: What did the blonde name her pet zebra? A: Spot!
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) You’ve always believed fire to be an uncompromising force of nature, but fire will surprise you next week when it respects your wishes to be cremated.
Q: What is the difference between a tick and a lawyer? A: A tick falls off of you when you die. Q: How do you keep a kid from wetting the bed? A: Give him an electric blanket! Q. Where do you find a one legged dog? A. Where you left it Animal Attraction A hunter spots a small brown bear and shoots it. He then feels a tap on his shoulder, turns around, and is face to face with a big black bear. “You’ve got two choices,” says the bear. “I maul you, or we have sex.” The guy opts to take it from the bear. After recovering for two weeks, the pissed-off hunter searches out and shoots the big black bear. Just then he feels another tap on his shoulder, and turns to see a 10-foot grizzly standing over him. “Admit it,” says the bear. “You don’t come here for the hunting, do you?”
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) ACROSS: 1. Minimal 6. Fertile areas in deserts 11. Water barrier 14. Left-hand page 15. A hidden treasure 16. French for “Summer” 17. Inquirer 19. Constrictor 20. Oval nut 21. A burial chamber 23. Glare 27. Noble 28. The study of the motion of gases 32. Forbidden 33. Express a thought 34. Furrow 37. Wickedness 38. Smelt badly 39. Fool 40. Collection 41. Fragment 42. Brownish gray 43. Pre-school 45. Add 48. Cantankerous 49. Pelvic
50. Moon of Saturn 53. Payable 54. Instructive 60. Estimate (abbrev.) 61. Turbine part 62. Malicious 63. Timid 64. A dangerous feat 65. Serf DOWN: 1. Fifty-six in Roman numerals 2. Poetic time of day 3. Paintings 4. South southeast 5. An underwater projectile 6. Auditory 7. Territory 8. Scattered 9. Biblical first woman 10. An act of help or assistance 11. Remove errors from 12. Coral island 13. Substantial 18. Extremely 22. Autonomic Nervous System 23. Movable fence barriers
24. Depart 25. Path around the sun 26. It comes from sheep 27. An eccentric idea 29. Famous 30. Without delay 31. Ore digger 34. Road 35. Not lower 36. Minuscule 38. A region of southeastern Pakistan 39. Gosh! 41. Chelae 42. Make dirty or spotty 43. New Zealand parrot 44. A nanny or billy 45. Assistants 46. Luxurious 47. Devoutness 50. Ballet wear 51. Computer symbol 52. Fruity pastry 55. A very small circular shape 56. A single thing 57. Zero 58. Bother 59. Permit
A heated domestic dispute between you and your partner will be needlessly prolonged this week after it repeatedly fails to turn physically violent.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) While you’ve always considered yourself to be the kind of person who puts others first, the women and children aboard a Carnival Cruise Ship next week will see things differently.
Pisces (Feb. 19 – Mar. 20) If there’s one thing you can’t stand, it’s having to unfairly choose a single personal grievance among literally dozens of others, each equally deserving of being vented. Either that or the way some people always talk with their mouths full.
Aries (Mar. 21 – Apr. 19) You will commit the deadly sin of pride again this week after deciding to work all 12 apostles into your Holy Trinity juggling routine.
Taurus (Apr. 20 – May 20) Taurus regrets to inform readers that it has just filed for Chapter 13 bankruptcy protection. All horoscopes will be handled through Hodgman & Associates, LLC until further notice.
Gemini (May 21 – Jun. 21) You used to think of yourself as your own harshest critic; sadly, it’s becoming increasingly clear that you’re fu*king pathetic at that, too.
Cancer (Jun. 22 – Jul. 22) You will struggle to live down a particularly embarrassing incident this week after you’re caught in public with the rest of your small, backwards town.
Leo (Jul. 23 – Aug. 22) Frustrations will boil over and lead to unexpected aggression,when, for the third straight night, your 6-year-old son falls asleep right in the middle of your bedtime story.
August 25 - 31, 2010 17
Photo Courtesy: Emery Way
18 August 25 - 31, 2010 by: Pat Moran
Looking For A New Job Sucks! “Man on His Throne” - firstname.lastname@example.org
Is there anything worse than looking for a new job? Okay, so yeah, there are a few things worse (genocide, famine, war, disease and Nicholas Sparks’ books just to name a few), but it sure is up there. It’s not the same as unemployment. Being unemployed means that you had a job and now you don’t. Sure, it sucks, but it doesn’t even compare to the monumental desperation of trying to find a new job. It’s unemployment with an added boost of stress and rejection. Sure, there are websites like Craigslist and Monster that are supposedly designed to make the job search easier and convenient, but they hardly ever work. You sit there, on your computer, clicking on link after link, filling out endless applications (with the same information that is already on your damn resume), writing cover letter after cover letter until your eyes cross in exhaustion.... Only to find nothing but rejections in your inbox, almost all of them talking about how great of a candidate you are, and oh no! They are so sorry, but they had to go with someone else...blah blah blah. Those job websites are basically just ripping off the strip club model of business.
The idea of showing a bunch of great jobs to people in unemployed desperation is just like paying to see a bunch of hot girls strip and then realizing that none of them will sleep with you. And with both jobs and strippers, once in a while one may work out and you’ll take one home, thinking you’ve finally got it, but once you see her in the light, you realize that it’s nothing like you thought it would be and now it burns when you pee. (Remember, folks, their knees are bruised for a reason!) And it’s not about the economy. The “well, things are tough in this economy” excuse is punch-worthy. It’s not about the economy. Finding a good job... hell, even finding a decent job...that both pays decently and lets you enjoy it...hell, that has always been an impossible task. Why do you think most people die right after they retire? Because the job sucks the life out of them. The sh!ttiest part? You have to put up with it. Everyone does. You can’t exist as a decent person without a job. And don’t give me any of that “free spirit” BS. You need something to do and you need money. Otherwise everyone will simultaneously think that you are a douche bag. And they will be right.