Beyond Words Literary Magazine, Issue 5, July-August 2020

Page 1

er mm Su 5 ue Iss y Jul t us ug -A 0 202

Beyond Words

n itio Ed I nternational Literary M agazine

A r t w or k : Q u i xote


B ey on d W or d s ? I n ter n ati on al L i ter ar y M agazi n e I ssu e 5, Ju ly - Au gu st 20 20 (Su m m er Ed i ti on ) Ed i t or : Gal Sl on i m Ed i t or i al boar d : Sof ía A gu i l ar , Sak i n a A l i ak bar , M ar i an K i l coy n e, K ay l a Fr an ces M u r r ay, Jad e Pal m er , San L i n T u n an d Jocely n M . U l ev i cu s Cop y r i gh t © Bey on d W or d s Pu bl i sh i n g H ou se, B er l i n , Ger m an y Fi r st p r i n ti n g, Au gu st 20 20 I SBN 978- 3- 948977- 12- 2


T h i s sp eci al su m m er i ssu e p r esen ts exci t i n g w or k s by t al en t ed w r i t er s an d v i su al ar t i st s f r om ar ou n d th e w or l d . A n ex ten d ed ed i t or i al boar d h el p ed sel ect t h e p i eces f or t h i s f est i ve 80 - p age ed i ti on ! So f Ă­a A gu i l ar i s a L ati n x w r i ter , p oet, an d f ou r t h - y ear st u d en t at Sar ah L aw r en ce Col l ege an d or i gi n al ly f r om L os A n gel es. You can v i si t h er at w w w.sof i aagu i l ar .com . Sak i n a A l i ak b ar w as bor n an d r ai sed i n Col om bo, Sr i L an k a, an d h as si n ce m oved t o M el bou r n e, Au str al i a w h er e sh e com p l et ed a M ast er of Cr eat i ve W r i t i n g. Sh e w r i t es f i ct i on , cr eati ve n on - f i cti on an d n on - f i cti on , p r ed om i n an t ly on i ssu es su r r ou n d i n g cu l t u r e, i d en ti ty an d sex u al i ty, an d occasi on al ly d abbl es i n scr een w r i t i n g. M ar i an K i l coy n e i s an I r i sh w r i ter w h o h as been p u bl i sh ed w i d ely. H er book T h e H ear t U n cu t w i l l be p u bl i sh ed i n Au tu m n 20 20 . K ay l a Fr an ces M u r r ay i s a Fl or i d a, U SA- based p oet ess an d a gr at ef u l ed i t or i al n ew bi e. H er p oem

"A m bly op i a" i s th e bl i n d w i n n er f eat u r ed i n t h i s i ssu e al on gsi d e Cassan d r a

H am i l ton 's stu n n i n g v i su al p i ece, "M y L ef t Ey e A f t er 1st Su r ger y." Jad e Pal m er cu r r en tly stu d i es En gl i sh at t h e U n i ver si t y of Sask at ch ew an an d i s w r i t i n g a book of p oetr y abou t h or ses. H er w h i m si cal m u si n gs, col l age p oet r y, an d sel f - p u bl i sh ed ch ap book L es Peti ts Peu s can be f ou n d on I n st agr am at jad e.p al m er .p oet r y. San L i n T u n h ol d s an M .A (BD h ), a BE (M et), an d i s cer t i f i ed i n A m Pox .3. H e h as au t h or ed over ten En gl i sh book s i n cl u d i n g t h e n ovel ?A n En gl i sh W r i t er ?. H e l i ves i n Yan gon , M y an m ar . Jo cel y n M . U l ev i cu s h as a back gr ou n d i n Soci al W or k , Psy ch ol ogy, an d Pu bl i c H eal t h . H er w or k i s ei th er f or th com i n g or p u bl i sh ed i n m agazi n es su ch as T h e San t a A n a Rev i ew, T h e San ta Fe L i ter ar y Rev i ew, B ee H ou se Jou r n al , an d Gash er M agazi n e. M s. U l ev i cu s cu r r en t ly r esi d es i n A m ster d am an d i s f i n al i zi n g h er f i r st book , a m em oi r , t i t l ed T h e B i r t h of A T r ee, w h i ch w as r ecen tly sh or tl i sted f or t h e San t a Fe W r i t er 's Pr ogr am 20 19 L i t er ar y Aw ar d , ju d ged by Car m en M ar i a M ach ad o. I n h er sp ar e t i m e, sh e h u n t s f or t r u t h an d beau t y. Con tact h er v i a I G @beau ty sti l l s. I w an t to th an k th e boar d m em ber s f or t h ei r d evot i on an d p r of essi on al h ar d w or k ! U n ti l Sep tem ber - take car e an d en joy t h e i ssu e! Gal Sl on i m Ed i tor


1


A t r i p t o t h e b ear ?s en cl o su r e A n d r es Cor d oba H e eats bean s l i ke a bear h oar d i n g a bl ock of bl ood . T h i s y ou k n ow si n ce H e t ook y ou on th e f i r st d ate to th e zoo to see t h e br an d n ew an i m al s th at w er e br ou gh t, an d th e sl ot h bear w as t h e sp eci es?gi ven n am e, bu t y ou an d h i m cal l ed i t Scooter . T h er e i s su ch p l easu r e i n sh r i n k i n g som eth i n g f i er ce. I t w as su m m er , i t w as bad w eat h er , bu t t h e k i n d w h er e t h e su n i s sh am el ess an d th e cl ou d s p r ov i d e n o d i str act i on s. Si m p l e, d i r ect cr u el t y i n th e r ad i an ce of a sol ar god . T h e keep er s assu r ed t h at Scoot er w ou l d be f i n e, bu t t h i s m u ggy bi tch of a m i d d ay taxed h i s sen ses. So, H e h ad scr eam ed , Som eon e save Scooter ! You f ool s! Gi ve h i m y ou r l u n ch ! B r i n g h i m ou r son s! Fol k s, d on ?t w e l ove i t w h en ol ?Scooter h er e d evou r s t h e ch i l d r en ? H i s ar m s w er e ou t, l i ke a gam e sh ow h ost d ol i n g l u x u r i es, an d becau se m i r acl es ar e n ot h i n g m or e th an h op e cl u tch i n g n ar r at i ve, i t f el t l i ke f at e t h at r i gh t t h en a ch i l d f el l i n . A f at boy w i th a basebal l cap . T u m bl ed over t h e r ai l i n t o t h e d en . A ci ty gasp s, th e af ter n oon sl ow s w i t h t h e sy r u p of bad ch an ce, t h en a keep er l eap t i n betw een th e bear an d boy, r em oved a cu be of cr i m son f r om h i s p ocket , an d tossed i t l i ke d i sr egar d i s al l som e an i m al s ar e w or t h . T h ey car r i ed th e boy u p an d h i s f am i ly w ep t , bu t al l y ou d i d w as w at ch t h e m on st r ou s t on gu e of Scooter l ap at h i s con sol ati on p r i ze? sw i n e bl ood , f r ozen . L ook i n g l i ke a r at i n a tr ash h eap over com e by i t s secon d h an d f east . N ever qu est i on i n g w h o gets th e m eat an d w h o r ecei ves i t s m em or y. So, y ou w atch h i m eat h i s bean s, h i s r i ce, si p h i s st eel r eser ve, an d y ou see d i gesti on ? tr ace i t s or i gi n s t h r ou gh th e tr an sp ar en t m an . T h e th i n gs a bod y w i l l d o to f i n d a p u r p ose i n i ts m eal s. You ask i f h e r em em ber s Scooter , an d h e ask s i f y ou cou l d br i n g t h e of f i ce cop i er h om e tom or r ow becau se h e k n ow s a m an t h at can m ake an y th i n g i n to m on ey. I t ?s so si m p l e r eal ly. W h o can r em em ber an y th i n g ot h er t h an t h e th u n d er stor m th at br ew s i n y ou r bed r oom n i gh t ly. T h e sou n d H e m ad e af ter y ou f i r st sh ow ed h i m th e l on ely r obi n th at w as y ou r bod y. T h e sof t r ai n f al l h i s cl ou d s can el i ci t i s en ou gh to k i l l gh ost s, t h e w ay H e con ju r es th e gu sts of d agger s ju st d ead ly en ou gh to op en th e ch ests of f oal s. You t ou ch h i s back as h e eats an d f eel i n si d e th e sp ace w h er e a back u sed t o be. T h e ch i l l of f r esh ly f r ozen can f eel l i ke w ar m t h i f y ou al l ow i t com p l ete en tr y agai n st y ou r bon es.

A r tw or k : K i m ber ly Jack son 2


3


T h e Ri n g Ken t W i tten bu r g

I h ear th e r i n g k n ock i n g on th e steer i n g w h eel of m y f ath er ?s Pon ti ac con ver t i bl e drum m ing h an d over h an d a l on g l ef t tu r n . Fr om m y gr an d f at h er t o m y f at h er f r om m y f ath er t o m e a h u n k of m et al u n ear t h ed by sl i ck sk i n n ed w or ker s i ts en gr av i n gs f r om f i n ger oi l s an d w or r y i n g l on g l ost n ow. W e w i l l n ever k n ow w h at l ed th e h u l k i n g M i ssou r i l i n em an th e h ar d - d r i n k i n g h ar d - gam bl i n g stor y - t el l i n g bu r sti n g w i t h l i f e f r u i t- p ack i n g Ri o Gr an d e Val l ey bu si n ess m an cott on gi n n er m an am on g m en br ot h er am on g br ot h er s w i t h sw eet w i f e an d ch i l d r en to w al k aw ay f r om i t al l on e col d Ch r i st m as af t er n oon w i n ter ci t r u s h ar vest ju st begi n n i n g th ou gh i t?s tr u e t h e gr ack l es h ad been p eck i n g h ol es i n t h e gr ap ef r u i t an d th e ol d est son h ad d r i ven i n t o on com i n g t r af f i c f or a l ar k .

A r tw or k : Joh n Ru ssel l 4


i n w at er Tex t an d ar t w or k : A n i a Cath er i n e I can t el l y ou abou t a m om en t bu t I can 't tel l y ou a stor y ask i n g m e to tel l y ou a stor y i s ask i n g m e to p ou r th e ocean d ow n y ou r t h r oat y ou w ou l d d r ow n i n m ean i n g i n w at er I w i l l gi ve y ou a gl ass of w ater I w i l l gi ve y ou a m om en t h er e's on e n ow

5


M o r e D en d r o l o gy Jam es D u cat

I r an aw ay. Sor t of . M y m oth er p acked m e a sn ack , ti ed i n t o a bu n d l e on th e en d of a st i ck . I stor m ed i n to t h e p i n e st an d acr oss th e str eet , l ef t h u m an i t y beh i n d . M y f eet cr u n ch ed n eed l es i n th e col u m n ed h al l of t r ees, each r each i n g ou t a br an ch - l i m b, w r eat h ed w i th th e f i n ger s of t h e n ex t , f l oati n g cei l i n g of gr een above m e as f ar as I w as f r om m y f or m er l i f e as a si x y ear - ol d . I sat on a f al l en t r u n k , r u bbed p i n e p i tch f r om m y h an d s w i t h d i r t , I n th e u n - w al l ed h ou se of sap an d n ot - car - f r esh en er ,

A r tw or k : Rober t M cN al ly

I sm el l ed n ati ve. T h e sm al l est t r ee.

6


A r tw or k : L or etta O l eck 7


Fl o o d i n g | Fl o at i n g | Fad i n g D en n a B er g

i . f lood i n g I w an t to go back to Cal i f or n i a an d d r i ve u n ti l al l th e h abi tabl e l an d i s su bm er ged u n d er th e bl an ket of th e ocean an d th e bassl i n e of th e car ster eo gets m u f f l ed as sou n d car r i es d i f f er en tly w h en w et. By th en n ati on al bor d er s w i l l n o l on ger be of v al u e so I can keep d r i v i n g on th e ocean bottom , seek i n g p l ateau s of u n d er w ater v al l ey s bask i n g i n th e i m p osi n g cl i f f si d es of san d castl e w al l s th at w er e on ce d eser tou s m ou n tai n s. i i . f l o at i n g I r ead abou t th e f l oati n g gar bage l ar ger th an Tex as an d gr ow i n g. I t w as on ce ad ver ti sed as a h u m an m ar vel , p h otos of i t sp r ead i n a gl ossy m agazi n e. M y tr u n k i s f i l l ed w i th can d y w r ap p er s p i cked u p as gas stati on su sten an ce. I f I ti r e of th ese u n d er w ater can y on s I can alw ay s p op th e tr u n k To f l oat u p to th e n ew bor n soi l th at?s oi l d er i ved an d cr i n k ly. i i i . f ad i n g Sal t w ater cau ses th i n gs to d ecay, f l esh f aster th an p l asti c. I f I h ad k n ow n i t w as goi n g to tu r n ou t th i s w ay I ?d h ave r ep l aced m y sel f l i m b- by - l i m b. Per h ap s th at's w h y br east i m p l an ts sw i tch ed f r om si l i con e to sal i n e. So th at th e f ad i n g w ou l d be m or e or gan i c as th e ocean sw al l ow ed u s w h ol e.

8


T h e W ay W est Pat r i ck T . Rear d on

Bl u e car ve th r ou gh p i n k p r ai r i e, r i ver r ou te ? a w al l - m ap l i f e, f r am ed ? t h r ou gh M i d w est gr ass an d bog, sog, a p or tage, th r on ecar r y r egal bar k ar ou n d M u d L ake su ck , ar m - sh ou l d er ch eek f i scal f u r s, t r ap p i n g w h at y ou can , th en th e sl og f r om A to B an d exch an ge i n ci ty f or a m om en t of

A r tw or k : L aw r en ce B r i d ges

w i l d , th en i n to w i l d agai n , agai n , tr i p s an d tr ap s, n ei th er x n or y, u n f or m u l a- ed ,

step p i n g on t o t h e

u n ti l , on e d ay,

gr ay asp h al t B l ack t op

f i n d i n g th e cr ack

beh i n d 135 N or t h

i n th e Star ved Rock

L eam i n gt on t o w at ch

st on e?

Roy Ei d an d Geor ge L ejeu n e an d B i l l Casey r ou gh an d r ead y t h ei r t een bod i es w i t h i n basket bal l cou r t l i n es, f ad i n g even th en am i d t h e br oken bot t l e gl ass agl eam al on g ed ges, on al l ey, i n d aw n , a star m ap of escap e to an ot h er cap t i v i t y.

9


A r tw or k : M eggan Joy

Rum S evem nge er!!

The following three works are the winners of our summer-themed 250-word writing challenge! 10


11


Jer sey C i t y Su m m er Gl or i a H ef f er n an You cou l d n ?t sp en d su m m er s on D u n can Aven u e w i t h ou t d r ead i n g th e f i r st d ay of sch ool , su r r ou n d ed by cl assm at es w h o h ad sp en t w eek s d ow n th e sh or e i n f l i p - f l op s an d t w o- p i ece bat h i n g su i t s an d af ter n oon s on th e B oar d w al k ? or u n d er i t ? l i st en i n g to tr an si stor r ad i os al l t u n ed t o d i f f er en t stat i on s l i ke O l d Testam en t si n n er s i n t h e w r eck age of an an ci en t t ow er . I n ever w en t d ow n th e sh or e. I w en t u p t h e stai r s to th e tar p ap er ed r oof of t h e t en em en t acr oss t h e str eet w h er e m y best f r i en d an d I w ou l d sp en d d ay s i m m er sed i n N an cy D r ew an d T i ger B eat , sl ath er i n g baby oi l on ou r sk i n t o cap t u r e t h e r ay s l i ke r ot i sser i e ch i cken s r evolv i n g i n a su p er m ar ket w i n d ow, tr y i n g to at tai n th e gol d en st at u s of t h e gi r l s w h o h au n t ed beach tow n s l i ke B el m ar an d W i l d w ood , an d Seasi d e H ei gh t s, w h o n ever cr acked th e sp i n e of a book becau se su m m er h ad i t s ow n m y st er i es t o solve an d n on e of th e cl u es cou l d be f ou n d i n N an cy ?s y el l ow r oad st er . H i gh above th e h y d r an t t h at sp r ay ed l i ke an i n n er - ci t y N i agar a, w e gu zzl ed ch er r y Kool - A i d f r om p ap er cu p s an d l i st en ed f or th e t i n k l i n g n otes of t h e M r . Sof tee i ce cr eam tr u ck th at si gn al ed t h e d ay ?s en d w i t h i ts n i gh t ly l u l l aby an d i t s cr eam y sw i r l s of sw eet n ess, n ever w or r y i n g abou t w h at w e m i gh t be m i ssi n g, or w on d er i n g w h at w e w ou l d say w h en th e teach er i n ev i tably asked , W h at d i d y ou d o on y ou r su m m er v acat i on ?

A r tw or k : Rex M au r i ce O p p en h ei m er

12


13


Su m m er t i m e B l u es B. L . M ak i ef sk y It

w as

M on r oe

th e

su m m er

w as f ou n d

Sp i d er - M an

M ar i ly n

d ead , an d

bor n . Bu t basebal l ,

sear ch i n g

f or

m u ch

of

t h ei r

ad ol escen ce) an d cl u n g t o t h em cl ose an d

op p r essi ve l i ke t h ei r

an d n ot w or l d even ts, m at t er ed t o

sod d en

th e L i ttl e L eagu e Cu bs. T h ey w er e

m u ggy an d joy l ess su m m er , lives

cel l ar - d w el l er s. T h e y ou n g boy s

in ruin f ai l u r e? l osses t h at t h ey

k n ew

cou l d n ?t

w el l

th e mercy rule, an d

m er cy w as ju st. T h r ou gh

it

al l ,

f ai l u r e? br ood i n g,

l oss

af t er

m agn i f i cen t ,

en d - of th e- w or l d f ai l u r e? f ai l u r e back

at

th em

each

m or n i n g i n th ei r r ef l ecti on s at t h e bottom of em p ty cer eal bow l s as th ey r each ed f or th ei r Breakfast of Champions, f ai l u r e th at h i t t h em l i ke a tr u ck l oad of h u r t each t i m e th ey u n l oad ed th ei r equ i p m en t at p r acti ce, th ei r

bats an d

gl oves

seem i n gly f u l l of h ol es, f ai l u r e th at beat sn ot an d sw agger f r om th em

sh ake

t h at

of f ,

h ot

l i ke

an d

a

tic

bu r r ow i n g u n d er t h e sk i n of t h ei r

h ear t- br eak i n g l oss, f ai l u r e af t er

l ook i n g

jer sey s

(a sw agger th ey ?d go on

w an an d f r agi l e selves t o i n f ect t h e w h ol e of t h ei r l i ves, an d n o m at t er h ow an gr i ly t h ey m i gh t k i ck i n f r u st r at i on an em p t y can d ow n t h e st r eet on t h ei r w al k h om e, or t h r ow

st on es h ar d

at

a

st r ay

cat ? w i t h t h e sam e su ccess t h ey h ad

h ittin g

th e

cu t of f

m an

ear l i er ? t h ey f ai l ed t o v an qu i sh i t , f ai l u r e, an d i n a f i n al act of r age an d r esi gn at i on t h ey w ou l d sl i n g t h ei r

w et

jer sey s

on t o

t h ei r

bed r oom f l oor al l t h e w h i l e t el l i n g m ot h er s an d f at h er s or si st er s an d br ot h er s ever y t h i n g w as just fine.

A r tw or k : M oi ses Ram os 14


A r t w or k : Rex M au r i ce O p p en h ei m er

15


H eat L esl ey H eber t D w ay n e cu r sed i n to th e d u sty ai r an d k i cked th e f r on t ti r e of h i s over h eated tr u ck . H e tu r n ed h i s l on g sal l ow f ace, cr ater ed by h ar d l i v i n g an d d eser t su n , tow ar d s t h e ci ty sk y l i n e, w aver i n g i n a d i stan t bl u e- gr ey h aze. T h e th or n y stem s of an ocoti l l o tow er ed over h i m , th e f i n ger s of i ts scar l et f l ow er s p oi n ti n g d ow n accu si n gly. H i s p h on e sear ch ed ai m l essly f or a n etw or k . ?U sel ess p i ece of sh i t!? H e h u r l ed th e p h on e at t h e ocoti l l o, bu t i t m i ssed an d sai l ed i n to th e f l at p u r p l e l eaves of a d i stan t p r i ck ly p ear . D w ay n e?s h ead th r obbed . H i s th r oat ach ed w i th th i r st. H e r each ed over th e d i scar d ed f ast f ood w r ap p er s on th e p assen ger seat f or h i s l ast bottl e of w ater . H e gu zzl ed th e w ar m , u n sati sf y i n g l i qu i d an d tossed th e d r ai n ed

bot t l e d ow n am on g t h e f l at t en ed ci gar et t e bu t t s an d br oken gl ass by t h e r oad si d e. H e r et r i eved a h eav y l eat h er bag f r om t h e t r ash - cover ed p assen ger seat , u n l at ch ed t h e bu r n i n g m et al cl asp an d gr abbed a bu n d l e of cr i sp t h ou san d - d ol l ar bi l l s. H e r i f f ed i t w i t h h i s t h u m b an d i n h al ed t h e od or of f r esh i n k . H e ch ecked h i s w at ch . ?H al f h ou r t i l l ou r m eet - u p . I ?d bet t er h u st l e.? D w ay n e?s f ad ed cow boy boot s cr u n ch ed on t h e gr avel r oad . Sw eat st u n g h i s ey es. T h e bag d u g i n t o h i s h an d . Feel i n g d i zzy, h e h ead ed f or t h e t h i n sh ad e of a t al l sagu ar o. H e f l op p ed d ow n an d l ean ed back , l et t i n g t h e cact u s sp i n es d i g i n t o h i s back . T h e ai r w obbl ed i n t h e h eat as h i s ey el i d s d r oop ed . I n sect s ch i r p ed . Si r en s w ai l ed i n t h e d i st an ce.

16


17


Fr i d ay t h e 13t h San d r a Casti รงo

Say y ou w er e bor n w r i n k l ed an d

I t t akes f i ve y ear s of sci en t i f i c

ch u bby w i th a h ai r y h ead l i ke a

r esear ch f or t h e d oct or s t o n am e

l i ttl e tr ol l d ol l on a Fr i d ay t h e 13t h .

y ou r con d i t i on , an d t w o m or e t o

You r m u m th i n k s i t sh ow s t h at

d eci d e t o cu t an d op en y ou r ch est

th er e?s

a

l i ke t h ey op en a d oct or ?s bag t o f i x

Fr i d ay th e 13th , y ou r gr an d m ot h er

y ou r h ear t . M ean w h i l e y ou h ave

l i gh ts

Ju d as

been gr ow i n g u p si cker , sp oi l ed

l ost

an d st u bbor n . A s t h e t i m e of t h e

cau ses an d d esp er ate cases, an d

su r ger y ap p r oach es, y ou r m ean

p r om i ses

ol d

n oth i n g

a

w r on g

can d l e

to

T h ad d eu s, p atr on

a

with

St .

sai n t

p i l gr i m age

of

to

th e

t each er

l et s y ou

l eave t h e

Sh r i n e of Fati m a, 150 m i l es aw ay,

cl assr oom

w h er e

to

an d p r et en d s n ot t o n ot i ce w h en

th r ee sh ep h er d ch i l d r en ex act ly

y ou sk i p y ou r h om ew or k , y ou r

si x ty - si x y ear s bef or e.

gr an d m ot h er an d y ou r au n t s l i gh t

th e

V i r gi n

ap p ear ed

I n a bl ack an d gr een M er ced es tax i , th ey br i n g y ou h om e w h er e y ou ?ll l i ve w i th y ou r m u m , y ou r gr an d p ar en ts

an d

tw o

au n ts. You scr eam

t een age

al l t h e w ay.

U n l i ke y ou r m oth er , y ou cam e i n a ti m e of h osp i tal bi r th s, p ow d er ed m i l k , vacci n es, d i sp osabl e n ap p i es, com p u l sor y p r oh i bi ted y ou r

ed u cati on , ch i l d

m oth er ,

an d

l abou r . U n l i ke

y ou

w er e

bor n

ou tsi d e of w ed l ock , y ou w er e n ot w an ted , at f i r st, bu t ver y m u ch l oved , soon af ter . Ad or ed . A si ck ch i l d , as sh e i s abou t to f i n d ou t w h en y ou tu r n p u r p l e an d st op

w h en ever y ou ask t o

m or e can d l es an d p r om i se m or e p i l gr i m ages, gr an d f at h er

y ou r ch okes

drunk an d

w eep s

w h en ever h e t r i es t o t al k t o y ou , y ou r

m ot h er

bu y s y ou

a sof t

can ar y y el l ow d r essi n g gow n w i t h em br oi d er ed d u ck s, an d a p u r p l e back p ack f i l l ed w i t h En i d B ly t on book s f or t h e h osp i t al . Sh e t el l s y ou h ow i t ?s l i ke a h ol i d ay, h ow l u ck y y ou ar e t h at y ou w on ?t h ave t o go t o sch ool f or a w h ol e m on t h , an d y ou can r ead , p l ay an d d r aw al l d ay. You h ave n ever h ad a d r essi n g gow n an d t h ose En y d B ly t on book s h ook y ou l i ke can d y.

br eath i n g af ter y ou r f i r st bat h .

A r tw or k : A n d r ea Jon es 18


W h en

y ou

op er ati n g

w ake

th eatr e

up

in

w i th

a

th e

ou t w h i l e si t t i n g at y ou r d esk an d

h ose

sl i t y ou r ch i n op en . W h en y ou r

d ow n y ou r n ose, sti cker s on y ou r

m ot h er

ch est, an d n eed l es p i er ci n g y ou r

h osp i t al , sh e t el l s y ou t h at y ou ar e

h an d s, i tch i n g an d ach i n g l i ke th ey

n ot al l ow ed t o r u n ar ou n d . You r

ar e p u l l i n g y ou r sk i n an d k i ck i n g

gr an d f at h er st ar t s escor t i n g y ou t o

y ou r ch est, y ou get i t. You get y ou r

sch ool ever y d ay. T h e y ear af t er

gr an d m oth er , y ou r

t h at t h ey p u t y ou i n a p r i v at e

gr an d f ath er ,

au n ts, y ou r

th e

Cat h ol i c sch ool , w h er e y ou ?ll be

teach er , bu t y ou d o n ot get y ou r

m or e car ef u l ly su p er v i sed an d ar e

m u m . M eeker

t h e on ly v i l l age k i d , t h e on ly on e

ask

th an d octor

Ci n d er el l a, p l ease

w i t h a f act or y w or ker si n gl e m u m .

r em ove th e h ose an d th e n eed l e,

Sh e cl ean s h ou ses on w eeken d s t o

w h en h e r ef u ses, y ou f or get y ou r

p ay f or y ou r p i an o l esson s. Sh e

m an n er s, y ou d em an d an d th en

w ou l d n ot l et y ou d o bal l et . At

y ou cr y w h en scr eam i n g i s t oo

f i f t een

y ou r

p ai n f u l . T h e w h ol e th i n g goes

finds

y ou r

w r on g an d y ou ar e stu ck i n th e

ever y bod y cr i es, i n cl u d i n g y ou r

h osp i tal f or th r ee m on th s. You r

m ot h er . At si x t een sh e p u sh es y ou

m u m keep s p r eten d i n g y ou ar e

t o st u d y sci en ce so y ou can go t o

th e l u ck i est gi r l al i ve, so d esp i t e

m ed i cal sch ool . At seven t een sh e

p eei n g p ai n f u l ly th r ou gh a tu be

d oes

i n to a bag, th e beep i n g m ach i n e,

boy f r i en d h om e, y ou ?r e t oo y ou n g

th e n eed l es, th e f eel i n g th at y ou r

f or boy s. At ei gh t een y ou l eave

bed i s a sp i n n i n g p i zza i n t h e

an d y ou n ever r et u r n .

h an d s of

th e

m ean

f r om

ol d

y ou

y ou r

col l ect s y ou

a p i zzai ol o

to

u n ti l

he

th r ow s i t i n ai r an d y ou th r ow u p i n y ou r bed , y ou n ever r eal ly k n ow th at y ou ar e at r i sk of d r op p i n g d ead . You su r v i ve. A

y ear

l ater ,

in

n ot

n osy

l et

ci gar et t es

y ou

af ter

an d

br i n g

y ou r

T w elve y ear s l at er , i n a f or ei gn cou n t r y, y ou r baby boy i s bor n w r i n k l ed , sk i n n y an d h ai r y l i ke a l i t t l e t r ol l d ol l on a Fr i d ay t h e 13t h . T h er e?s n ot h i n g

sch ool ,

gr an d m ot h er

Fr i d ay t h e 13t h .

p l ay i n g f ootbal l at r ecess, y ou p ass

19

w r on g

with

a


W e Sp eak Pr o p er M i ch ael Ch av i n d a W e sp eak p r op er Fash i on ed w el l by bor r ow ed accen t s D ar e y ou cat ch m e sou n d i n g t oo l ocal I 'm n ot. T h ou gh m y p assp or t i s u n st am p ed I h ave tr avel l ed f ar t h r ou gh scr een s. I 've br oken - t el ep h on ed m ass m ed i a, M i xed i t w i t h t h e r em n an t s of sel f - h at e Gi ven to ou r f or ef at h er s By m agn an i m ou s m i ssi on ar i es. O u r h an d - m e- d ow n s. T h e m on key - su i t I w ear w h en I l au gh At th e ch op es of t h ose w h o on ce L au gh ed at m e. Each ti m e t h ey l au gh ed - a ch oi ce To be si l en t an d avoi d scr u t i n y

A r t w or k : M ar ci e Br on stei n

O r to sp eak p r op er .

20


21


M u r d er at t h e Secr et Ri v er B. H . Pi tt O n th e l ast w ar m d ay of Sep tem ber I took m y book to th e secr et r i ver th at cu r ves an d f l ow s th r ou gh th e h ear t of th e p ar k i n th e an ci en t ci ty.

W i t h m y f i r st st ep

I staked m y sp ot i n th e gr ass.

I al m ost sl i p p ed

W h at's l ef t to be sai d

on t h e m ossy r i ver bed ,

abou t an af ter n oon sp en t

bu t cau gh t m y sel f .

i n su n sh i n e, th e bu r bl e

Even a gen t l e cu r r en t

of r u n n i n g w ater ?

can sw eep y ou aw ay

A l i ttl e w ay to m y r i gh t

i f y ou l et i t .

a p r egn an t w om an i n a su n d r ess?

T h e cr ow s,

eager to en joy th e w ar m th of th e d ay ?

f r esh ly cl ean ed ,

n ap p ed p eacef u l ly,

t ook f l i gh t an d

h er bi g bel ly ai m ed

t ook t h ei r l eave of t h e r i ver

at th e cl ear bl u e sk y.

f or t h e d ay.

Acr oss th e r i ver ,

T i m e st ar t ed t o cou n t agai n

a n u d e m an r ecl i n ed com f or tably

af t er t h ey w er e gon e.

an d l i sten ed i n ten tly

I n t h e n ear d i st an ce,

to a sp or ts m atch on h i s r ad i o.

ch u r ch bel l s r an g f i ve o?cl ock .

A s I r ead ,

I w al ked t o t h e m ar ket squ ar e

a m u r d er of cr ow s sw oop ed i n .

an d bou gh t a jar of h on ey.

T h ey l an d ed u p r i ver on th e op p osi te ban k , star tl i n g th e n aked m an . I t w as ti m e f or th e bi r d s to take th ei r w eek ly bath i n th e i cy w ater s. I t w as i n th at m om en t w e k n ew D eath w as on br eak . So I got to m y f eet, cu f f ed m y jean s to th e k n ee an d w ad ed

A r tw or k : M ar y K am er er

i n to th e f r i gi d w ater . 22


A r t w or k : M ar y K am er er 23


N o t al l ow ed t o l et i t sh ow C. Gay l e T h er e?s a ti n y m an i n m y cei l i n g ? O r at l east th e p r of i l e above h i s t or so I s cl ear ly etch ed bet w een t h e r an d om Sp eck s of cl ay. H e w ear s su n gl asses.

W h en I l ook cl oser , h e?s i n f act l ook i n g Past m y sh ou l d er , t ow ar d s t h e l ef t . I t?s th e sam e w h en I l ook i n t h e m i r r or , T h e f eel i n g of sp ace l oom i n g over m e.

I t r em i n d s m e of a y ou n ger t i m e, w h en Sh ad ow s h au n ted m y p ar en t s?h al l s, T h ey sw am ar ou n d m e l i ke gl ass eel s. D i d I i m agi n e th ei r i r i d escen t sh i m m er ?

T h e ver y sh am ef u l sh ad ow s sp oke t o m e, T h ei r w h i sp er s h i ssi n g i n m y ear . N o u se Pr eten d i n g th at I cou l d n ?t u n d er st an d , T h at I w asn ?t d r aw n t o t h i s ap op h en i a.

W h en m y l i gh t l ost i t s w ay, t h ey r op ed , th ey cr aw l ed u n d er m y sk i n . W ear y, t h ey r ested i n m y bon es, i n m y ever y i n t en t . I becam e af r ai d of op en d oor s, t h en .

T h e cl osi n g becam e com p u l si ve, n eed ed . U n ti l I sat an d sh ar ed m y t ea w i t h t h em . N ow th ey ju st w ai t f or m e t o f i n i sh gazi n g at th ei r h i d d en f ace. I sm i l e

I f I catch a sh i f t, a sl i p . I ch ase t h e on es T h at l oom ben eat h t h e si n k i n g su n . I w atch f or th e r eveal an d i t 's cl ear , i t ?s n ot h ap p en i n g to m e, i t ?s ju st h ap p en i n g.

24


25


So m et h i n g B o r r ow ed M ol ly Keegan

Gr i ef p u l l s of f y ou r em ot i on s l i ke

W h od i n i .

a l ay er of sk i n an d sh oves i t d ow n

n ever p l ay ed m u si c. Sh e l et t h e

y ou r th r oat l i ke a scar f . You can

p i an o si t , each key a f l at l i n e.

p u l l i t ou t l i ke a m agi ci an bu t i t w on ?t be p r i m ar y col or s. I t ?ll be sh r ed d ed r ags, l i ke gh ost gar b or cu r tai n s

f r om

y ou r

You r

gr an d m ot h er

?You ar e t h e ol d est of t h r ee,? sh e cr i ed w h en y ou p u l l ed t h e cl ean l ace of f t h e br an ch es.

gr an d m a's

h ou se, w h er e sh e p l ay ed W h od i n i on a sp i n et an d bl each ed l ace i n th e k i tch en si n k . Sh e?d l et i t d r y i n th e or ch ar d , w h i ten i n g t h e t r ee

You

an d

y ou r

cou si n s r om p ed

ar ou n d t h e f r u i t . M u d d y. Ju bi l an t . W ear i n g h ead s

t h e cu r t ai n s on

l i ke

babu sh k as,

y ou r

p eek i n g

t h r ou gh d el i cat e h ol es l i ke sp i r i t s

l i m bs, p oi son i n g th e cr ab ap p l es.

si t t i n g on t h e ed ge of y ou r bed At n i gh t y ou l ai d by th e t r u n k s,

w h i l e y ou p r et en d ed t o n ap .

cr am m i n g y ou r l egs i n a p i l l ow case? a m akesh i f t sl eep i n g bag, l i sten i n g to cr i ckets, w on d er i n g w h at

it

be

l i ke

to

be

a

?T h ese ar en ?t d r eam s, baby gi r l ,? Gr an d m a

sai d

on e

even i n g.

?You ?r e i n t r ou bl e n ow.?

h al f - ch i l d - h al f - tr ee. You i m agi n ed

Bu t y ou r gr an d m a d i d n ?t u se a

a h u n d r ed sp i n d l ey l egs, t an gl i n g

w ood en

togeth er u n d er gr ou n d . Tet h er ed

st or i es.

so ti gh t y ou can ?t m ove. W oven .

cu r t ai n s, r em i n d ed y ou t h at t h ey

W ar p ed .

on ce

T h i s kep t y ou r br ai n of f gh ost s. Petr i f i ed by th e si n gl e tom bst on e i n th e n ei gh bor s' y ar d . U n abl e t o

sp oon . Poi n t ed

d r ew

Sh e to

sh ad e

r ep eat ed th e

soi l ed

ar ou n d

h er

bod i ce. A w ed d i n g d r ess. Recy cl ed t o bl ock ou t t h e su n . B l each ed w h i t e t o r em ai n p u r e.

see th at th er e i s n o p h an t om . Ju st

N ow

y ou r ow n n eed to f eel w at ch ed or

M ot t l ed

h au n ted .

p r ou d t h e w ay y ou w er e p r ou d

Take ou t th e gag al on e i n a cl oset . Pu l l th e scar f ou t, r ag by r ag. D r y th e cl oth on a tr ee beh i n d y ou r ap ar tm en t.

D on ?t

boogi e

to

A r tw or k : K i er a Stu ar t 26

y ou

w ear

th e

sp eck s of

r em n an t s. l i f e.

You ?r e

w h en y ou w er e l i t t l e. T h an k f u l f or t h e m ess y ou cr eat ed . Reju ven at ed by t h e st ai n .


27


C h i l d h o o d Ph o t o gr ap h B abi th a M ar i n a Ju sti n

D ad ?s Yash i ca l en s sn ap p ed sh atter i n g th e si l en t m oor i n gs of h er ch i l d h ood h om e? p er ch ed on a sw am p's ed ge w i t h p l ai ted p al m - l eaf r oof i n g. H er Gu l f - r etu r n ed d ad sp or ted a sp ar r ow - n est p u f f on h i s h ai r ? , ? sw u n g h i s cam er a on h i s sh ou l d er s w i th a sw ag, sm el l ed of Gi ven ch y an d sw eat. H e th r u st a sabl e- col ou r ed saf ar i su i t on h i s son , w h o w or e i t s van i ty over h i s r el u ct an ce. A su l tr y su m m er sp r ay ed d ow n w i th a sh ak y r oar of th u n d er , th e cen ti p ed e- r ai n r an h er n ai l s over th e w ear y w i n d ow p an es. T h e gi r l w or e h er f r i l l ed ch i f f on s. H er br oth er squ i r m ed u n d er h i s n ew saf ar i - sk i n . T h ey gl u ed to each oth er on a t ep i d t r i cy cl e, w i th gr i m sm i l es p l ast er ed on t h ei r f ace. T h e sea si gh ed an d sn i f f l ed seven m i l es aw ay. D ad ?s step s stom p ed ar ou n d scaven gi n g f r am es; r ai n - n eed l es r ai sed t h ei r p r i ck ly h ai r . T h e f etch i n g l en s- f an gs w i n ked t h r i ce: m i r r or i n g th e gl i m m er of f ou r bu t t on - ey es, sm u d gi n g th e sn ot - sn ai l sl i ver s on gl assy sk i n , setti n g af l am e m op s of h ai r . D ad ?s Yash i ca ey es sp on ged d ow n tear y - sp i r al l ed f r am es i n t o East m an r ai n bow h u es w i th ever y l i gh t n i n g f l ash .

A r tw or k : M ar i e K am er er 28


B ay W i n d ow s Fr an k Gu er r an d en o

Som e of th em gagged h er ; br oke th e stai n ed gl ass beh i n d h er ton si l s. T h e oth er s l i m p ed aw ay af ter f eel i n g th e d ol l ar s n ex t t o t h e f am i ly p h otos i n th ei r w al l et s.

A r tw or k : Pau l a Cam ach o 29


M o n st er s Br en n an B ar n ey

I even r em em ber h ow m an y p ot at oes I p eel ed . Si x . T h r ee f or each of u s, si n ce th ey w er en ?t al l th at bi g. I w ash ed t h em an d p eel ed t h em over t h e si n k , n oth i n g u n u su al , star i n g ou t t h e w i n d ow t h i n k i n g abou t w h o k n ow s w h at. A n d , I sw ear on m y l i f e, w h en I l ooked d ow n ? t h er e, i n t h e d ar k n ess of th at si n k d r ai n , w as an ey ebal l . St ar i n g r i gh t back at m e. Cl ear as d ay. Sh i n i n g an d al i ve, bl i n k i n g. N ow, I h ate to ad m i t th i s, bu t I t u r n ed on t h e d i sp osal r i gh t aw ay. W h i ch i s th e w or st th i n g y ou cou l d d o i f som et h i n g w er e act u al ly d ow n th er e? som eh ow, God f or bi d . I r an t h e p eel s d ow n t h e d r ai n w i t h ou t l ook i n g back , d i d n ?t sl eep a w i n k t h at n i gh t . I ?ve n ever tol d an y on e th i s.

A r t w or k : L an e M och ow 30


31


Say i n g go o d by e d u r i n g a p an d em i c Josep h i n e B l ai r

i n ou r ap ar tm en t, w e n ever sat on th e f i r e escap e. bu t h er e w e w atch th e l i gh t cr eep u p i v y on th e br i ck , w atch th e p i geon w i th th e w h i te w i n gs m ake h i s r ou n d s. h e v i si ts th e sam e br an ch es on th e sam e tr ees each d ay. w e say good by e w h i l e h e tou ch es each sp ot to m ake su r e h i s w or l d i s sti l l th er e. i f i h ad tw o w h i te w i n gs, i w ou l d tr ad e t h em f or som eth i n g better , tou ch as m u ch as i cou l d bef or e i t w as gon e. y ou r each f or m y h an d i n th e si l en ce betw een si r en s. w e ar e al l goi n g to l ose som eth i n g. i cl i m b back i n th r ou gh th e w i n d ow l ook ou t on to th e ci ty w atch th e cl ou d s car r y y ou aw ay.

A r tw or k : D esi r ee D u f r esn e 32


B i o m es M el i ssa L aD u c A bi om e: Stan d i n g sai n tly i n th e m or n i n g gl ow, A bl u e- gr ey h er on at th e p on d . L on g beak ti p p ed u p ju st sl i gh tly, L egs scar cely seen , h i d d en i n gr assy f r i n ge. N ear by, a h aw k ci r cl es w i th p u r p oseL ean i n to th i s Gr eat Pau se. W h y h ave th e aves com e tod ay ? A n om en , a h ar bi n ger p er ch an ce. O w ed ap ol ogi es O r d eep con f essi on s. *** I am sor r y I d i d n ot v i si t m or e. I am sor r y I n ever w en t back W h en I saw y ou r h osp i tal bed str et ch ou t l i ke a cor p se Bef or e th e bay w i n d ow i n th e w est en d of y ou r h om e. *** O r , p er h ap s, T h e Br oth er s w er e h er e l ast w eek an d y et t h e w eek bef or e. i n r egu l ar atten d an ceban al . Poi n ti n g an d sp y i n g p r ey, san d seep i n g over toes, br eeze ti ck l i n g u n d er w i n gs A w ay stati on to r est i n th e h u m d r u m of th i n gs. *** ?Be car ef u l n ot to tou ch ? M om w ou l d say w h en w e w en t to ot h er s?h om es. O u t of r esp ect. W e w er e v i si ti n g - ju st v i si ti n g.

A r tw or k : Car r i e H u n ter 33


34


T h e n ei gh bor s tw o d oor s d ow n w er e ol d . A n d th e h u sban d ?s n am e w as Z i ggy. I h ad n ever m et an y on e w i t h a Z i n h i s n am e, l et al on e a cap i t al . I t m ad e m e cu r i ou s. W h at abou t th e k i d s? T h er e w er en ?t an y, w e w er e tol d . A f am i ly w i th ou t k i d s? At th e bu s stop th e n ei gh bor s an d I col l ected w or m s Scoop i n g th em i n to a p i l e W h i l e w e th eor i zed : Per h ap s th ey w er e br oth er an d si st er N o, Ri ck y sai d , th ey w er e m ar r i ed , T h ey ju st d i d n ?t w an t k i d s. T h at d i d n ?t m ake sen se. Becau se th ey h ad seem ed n i ce Bu t Ri ck y sai d th ey h ad a d og. T h at d i d i t. W e w ou l d go. A n d w e w en t . A l l f ou r of u s f r om th e bu s stop cor n er , w e w ou l d v i si t . Q u i te qu i ck ly, i t w as som et h i n g w e h ad alw ay s d on e. Ru n n i n g n ex t d oor . Ju st f or a m i n u te, to say h i to Z i ggy an d M r s. Sh oost er . Z i ggy p ou r ed u s m i l k . W e h at ed m i l k , Bu t m om m a h ad tau gh t u s to be p ol i t e A n d so th at f i r st d ay w e ?t h an k y ou d ?an d w e si p p ed su r p r i sed to f i n d i t r i ch er an d p u r er th an th e sk i m w e h ad at h om e. L i f e w as r i ch er , N ex t D oor . Sh e h ad a stool sh e p u l l ed u p to th e cou n t er . A n d th ey sat an d si p p ed cof f ee, Sh e an d h er ti n y, gr ey p ood l e. Fat f r om sh ar i n g p eop l e f ood , h e l i ked th e cof f ee cu p r i gh t w h er e h er l i p s h ad been . Ch er i , th e p ood l e, too f at to w al k

35


A r tw or k : K ar y n a A sl an ov a 36


So t h ey kep t a r ol l i n g bassi n et r i gh t n ex t t o t h e st ool A n d sh e p l aced Ch er i i n th e bassi n et to h op ar ou n d . A r ou n d gl ass tabl e w as i n th e l i v i n g r oom i n f r on t of t h e con sol e t el ev i si on . M r s. Sh ooster p u t can d y i n bow l s f or u s. A n d w e w al ked i n ci r cl es i n t h e l i t t l e r oom . L ap s ar ou n d th e gl ass tabl e Ring around the candy dish, Pockets full of sweedish fish Butterscotch and mintsies W e m ad e u p ly r i cs an d p u t on sk i ts. A n d M r s. Sh ooster l au gh ed . Cof f ee an d m i l k . T h e stool . T h e d og. T h e gl ass tabl e. T h e can d y. T h e ti m e sp en t si tti n g. Even th en i t seem ed i d y l l i c. A bi om e. *** Fr ogs gr oan w h en d ar k n ess l an d s L on gi n g f or som eth i n g cer tai n W ai ti n g at th e sh or e Per si sten tly cal l i n g f or m or e. *** W e stop p ed v i si ti n g. N ot r eal ly on p u r p ose, Ju st becau se, w el l , At som e p oi n t, i t seem ed od d To v i si t. W h at w ou l d w e d o th er e? Si n g? D an ce ar ou n d t h e t abl es? W e w er e ol d er . H i gh sch ool er s. Ri ck y an d I w er en ?t r eal ly h an gi n g ou t an y m or e A n d I sti l l h ad a ter r i bl e cr u sh on h i m . So col l ecti vely, w i th ou t agr eei n g W e ju st stop p ed goi n g. *** M r s. Sh ooster , sh e w ou l d h ave k n ow n m y h er on ?s f i gu r e f r om af ar . T h e gr ey i sh - bl u e oval A n d th e cu r ve of th e n eck

A r tw or k : Car r i e H u n ter

37


38


A n d h ow i t seem ed to h over above th e r eed s as i t s l egs bl en d ed i n . Sh e w ou l d h ave k n ow n th e h aw k ci r cl es ju st so W h en a f i sh ju m p s. Sh e w ou l d h ave seen h i m y ester d ay an d th e d ay bef or e. Sh e h ad ti m e f or p atter n f or m i n g. M r s. Sh ooster at th e cou n ter W i th Z i ggy A n d Ch er i . A n d h er m i l k an d cof f ee an d can d y d i sh es. M y l ast v i si t, I w en t al on e. T h er e w as a d i f f er en t sm el l th i s ti m e. N ot ju st d og, bu t sou r p eop l e. T h e cou ch h ad been m oved ou t of th e l i v i n g r oom , T h e gl ass tabl e scooted to th e si d e To m ake r oom f or a h osp i tal bed . sh e l ay p r op p ed u p f aci n g th e w i n d ow. Sh e asked i f I l i ked h er h at. L au gh i n g, sh e eased m e i n to th e r oom . H er h ai r w as gon e, th e ch em o ev i d en t ly t ak i n g i t . Sh e w or e a p i n k stock i n g cap T h e col or of th e bassi n et. I t h ad been p u l l ed u p n ex t to th e h osp i t al bed . A n d as I l ef t, I r em em ber L i n ger i n g. Som eth i n g abou t th e sp ace w as qu i te n i ce. T h e w ay ti m e sl ow ed . T h e w ay ti m e eased i n th r ou gh th e cr ack s, L i ke san d seep i n g th r ou gh toes. A bon d p h y si cal m or e th an em oti on al , H aw k i n g at th e f r on t d oor A h er on p oi sed ju st so. *** Pl ates sh i f t. Bi om es al ter ed by a Gr eat Pau se. T h e h er on str etch es i ts n eck , w i d en s i ts w i n gs i n a f l u i d m oti on an d i s gon e.

A r tw or k : Ser ge L ecom te 39


40


41


A t an A .A . M eet i n g i n East B o st o n M al i k Sel l e ?th er e ar e th ose of u s w h o tr eat ou r bod i es w or se th an am u sem en t p ar k s an d w e d on ?t k n ow w h en t o get of f th e r i d e? T h i s I l ear n ed f r om a sal l ow - f aced el ectr i ci an w h ose n am e I d i d n ?t both er to l ear n even th ou gh h e sai d i t tw i ce d u r i n g h i s ti m e to tal k an d I d i d n ?t p oi n t ou t h i s w as an i m p er f ect m etap h or ; I go to th e n ear est col l ege acr oss f r om th e bl u e l i n e ci v i c cen ter stop I k n ow abou t th ese th i n gs A n d I ?m on ly h er e to m ake m y gi r l f r i en d h ap p y becau se m y on ly p r obl em i s k n ow l ed ge so I m i gh t gr ab a d r i n k af ter th i s

A r tw or k : M oi ses Ram os 42


43


T h e D eser t o r T h e B ay M al i k Sel l e I cam e al l th e w ay f r om Red H am l et, Cal i f or n i a an ex i l e bu i l t f r om p r i n ci p l ed si n , t h e m ach i n at i on s of an ad u l t book st or e or tou r i st cou r t d ay r at e i n l i n e w i t h th e f i l th f ou n d beh i n d th e l ocal d i ve. Q u i ck san d of t h e m i n d : a y ou n g ad d i ct m akes col d , p ai n f u l l ove w i t h th e cactu s sh e m i stook f or Jesu s f u l l of Pep si f r om th er e, I w en t n or t h u p stat e, h op i n g to m ake a B ar bar y Coast of y ou r t h i gh bef or e I r em em ber ed t h at I f or got w e m et i n col l ege, ou t east. N ot i n th e d eser t n or m y h om et ow n w h er e l egs d an gl i n g of f t h e Gol d en Gat e I r ead Joh n U p d i ke, n egl ect ed econ om y an d ci v i cs, n ever bot h er ed t h e p r om qu een So w h en y ou l ef t I saw t h e h abi t , h ow i n d eci si on st i l l br eak s m y n eck

A r tw or k : K i er a Stu ar t

44


45


K i n t su gi M er esh ah M er y bal M y con f i d an t s, M es i m beci l es, T h e si n ger an d t h e p ai n t er T h e m u si ci an s, T h e op p osi t es. W h en t h e h eaven s cr ash an d f al l A n d w h en t h e seas cat ch f i r e, O p p osi t es becom e on e. T h e tal e of t h e t w o w om en H ow a br oken si n ger H el d a br oken p ai n t er A n d gl u ed t h em selves t oget h er W i th m or sel s of gol d Scr ap ed f r om a p oor w r i t er ?s h ear t ? Cal l ed i t K i n t su gi . T h ei r p i eces p u t t oget h er , L i ke sh ar d s of st ar s Stol en f r om t h e cosm os, Each th e ot h er ?s gr av i t y. W h er e d o I f i t i n ? A m i d st t h e r age, t h e p assi on , t h e f i r e, T h e p oor w r i t er bu r n s. N ot an ar t i st , n ot a m u si ci an , n ever t h e st ar ? B r oken p i eces f i t t oget h er , T h e sh at t er ed m ess d oes n ot . A l over of al l t h i n gs Jap an ese, O n e l ook at t h e K i n t su gi A n d th e si n ger u n d er st ood ar t , A n d ever y t h i n g t h e p ai n t er alw ay s k n ew. I sh ou l d n ?t f i t i n . Yet, I d o. Som eh ow, st r an ge, W i th n o r eason , I ?m sti l l h er e. A m i d st t h e r age, p assi on , an d f i r e T h e p oor w r i t er d i d n ot bu r n . Reason i s n ot t h e t r u t h , A n d tr u t h d oes n ot seek r eason . N ever th e sam e, y et so al i ke. Em p ath y f ou n d t h em A n d cal l ed t h em h om e.

A r tw or k : L i ly O l i n 46


A r t w or k : A n gel a D agosti n o 47


T h e St at e o f t h e W o r l d L en a Rosi n g

L i ke a gr ou p of p eop l e ch atti n g too f ar

an d

aw ay f or on e to r eal ly h ear an y th i n g el se

h er e. D u r i n g

th an a h u m m i n g, th e sou n d of t h e

p r obl em s w er e solved by t h e cl i n gi n g of

m ar ket r each ed h er l on g bef or e th e si gh t

gl asses an d a t oast t o l i f e?s u n bear abl e

of i t. Sh e w en t str ai gh t f or th e u p st ai r s

vol at i l i t y, w h i l e l ove w as l ou d ly an d

caf ĂŠ. W h i l e th e p r i ce of

si n cer ely ex p r essed . For a si l en t bu t

br ead w as

d esp ai r

w er e op en ly th e

l at e

h ou r s, w or l d

alw ay s u p f or d ebate som ew h er e al on g

op i n i on at ed

th e f ad ed f acad es of th e m ar ket st an d s,

p er f ect p l ace t o en cou n t er a t r u th f u l

th i s

t est i m on y of t h e st at e of t h e w or l d , a

si zzl i n g

Sep tem ber

m or n i n g

seem ed to be r eser ved f or th e d i scu ssi on

sp ect at or ,

con si d er ed

th is

w as

th e

p l ace t o t r y t o m ake sen se of i t al l .

of w h at str an ger s w er e al r ead y r ef er r i n g

?Sh e i s a m ou t h f u l t h at on e, h as a m i n d

to as ?th e i n ci d en t?. T r u th be tol d , sh e

of h er ow n ,? sai d t h e ven d or sel l i n g

h ad com e f or th e sam e. Even bef or e

or an ges at t h e st an d bel ow t h e w i n d ow,

r each i n g h er seat by th e op en w i n d ow

?p r et t y as a p each i n m or n i n g l i gh t , bu t a

f aci n g th e squ ar e, sh e cou l d h ear t h e

m ou t h f u l f or su r e.?

f i sh er m an ?s w i f e bel ow th e w i n d ow l ou d an d cl ear . I t w as qu i te p er f ect. Ex act ly h ow ever y bod y k n ew th e d etai l s of Sr .

Pay i n g at t en t i on t o t h e con ver sat i on s of

A r m an d o?s

th e

st r an ger s h ad alw ay s been m or e of a

y ou n gest Sr a. Tar avel l a w as d i f f i cu l t t o

r em ed y t o h er , t h an a d el i ber at e at t em p t

say, bu t ever y bod y cer tai n ly seem ed t o

to

bel i eve th at th ey k n ew ex actly w h y i t

bu si n ess. At l east t h at w as w h at sh e t ol d

h ad occu r r ed .

h er sel f .

f ai l ed

p r op osal

to

ot h er

t h ey

p eop l e?s

som et i m es

d ay bef or e, t h ei r con ver sat i on s alw ay s

m ost i n tr i gu i n g to h er taste i n d i al og. At

r eassu r ed h er , t h at h er ow n d esp ai r w as

th e m ar ket i n p ar ti cu l ar , th e voi ces of f or

A l t h ou gh

in

m em or y of t h e p l aces sh e h ad been t h e

str eet cor n er s w er e alw ay s am on gst t h e

scr eam i n g

ar ou n d

seem ed l i ke a f acel ess m ass, a f oggy

T h e con ver sati on s of tow n squ ar es an d

ven d or s

sn eak

p er f ect ly n at u r al . M or e of t en t h an n ot ,

p eop l e?s

t h ey al so seem ed l i ke t h e on ly con st an t

atten ti on seem ed to p er f ectly sh i el d , t h e

i n an ever - ch an gi n g w or l d . A l t h ou gh t h e

l ow er ed voi ces of i n d i v i d u al s r ep or t i n g

ch ar act er s an d t h e t i m e an d p l ace w ou l d

on th e m i ser y of oth er s f r om beh i n d

ch an ge w i t h t h e n ar r at or , t h e su bject s

th ei r stan d s, sh ar i n g d etai l s of u n i ver sal

d i scu ssed w er e alw ay s t h e sam e.

i n ter est. Stor i es of l ove an d l oss, l on gi n g

48


D esp i te ever so th r i l l i n g, l i sten i n g t o t h e

t h ei r com p l i m en t s even t u al ly t u r n ed t o

con ver sati on s

i n su l t s. T h e w or l d w as cer t ai n ly st r an ge.

of

str an ger s

w as

n ot

alw ay s w i th ou t p er son al ex p en se. H ad

?Sh e i sn ?t goi n g t o f i n d a bet t er m an i n

sh e n ot been l i sten i n g to th e gi r l s si t t i n g at th e n ex t tabl e at L a Cor d i l l er a t w o

t h i s t ow n , t h at ?s f or su r e an d cer tai n ,? sai d

w eek s p r i or , sh e w ou l d n ever h ave gi ven

t h e f i sh er m an ?s w i f e, h er

su ggest i n g

th e si ze of h er h an d s an y p ar t i cu l ar

h op el essn ess

r at h er

t on e t h an

sy m p at h y. ?Sh e i s st i l l y ou n g t h at ?s al l ,

atten ti on . N ow i t w as of ten on h er m i n d . Sh e h ad d eci d ed h ow ever , th at r i sk i n g th e d i scom f or t of an h on est op i n i on

gi ve h er a f ew y ear s an d sh e w i l l set t l e t o t h e ci r cu m st an ces, ju st l i ke ever y bod y el se.?

abou t h er ow n ap p ear an ce w h i l e ou t am on gst str an ger s w as a r i sk , sh e w as w i l l i n g to take. Su ch i n ci d en ts w er e r ar e

W h i l e w ai v i n g a sh i n y r ai n bow r u n n er i n t h e ai r , t h e f i sh er m an cal l s f or h i s w i f e f r om beh i n d h i s st an d . W i t h a cl i ck

af ter al l . U su al ly, p eop l e w ou l d go abou t

of h er t on gu e an d a l i gh t sh ake of h er

th ei r d ay, ch atti n g abou t an y th i n g an d

h ead i n h i s d i r ect i on , sh e an n ou n ces

ever y th i n g bu t h er sh or t ap p ear an ce i n

t h at sh e w i l l be t h er e ex act ly w h en i t

i t.

su i t s h er , an d n ot a secon d bef or e. A s t h e sp ect at or l ooked u p t ow ar d s t h e

A s sh e w as si tti n g at L a Pi ed r a, d eep ly em er ged i n th e stor y of Sr . A r m an d o, th r i l l i n gly tol d by th e f i sh er m an ?s w i f e f r om

ben eath

th e w i n d ow, a y ou n g

M ar abel l a,

h er

at

th e cor n er ar m

f i r m ly

of

La

of

th e

m en

p assi n g

h er

Sep t em ber

La

Pi ed r a

m or n i n g.

t h e sp ect at or t h at Ju st

si zzl i n g l i ke

th e

ex i st en ce of ever y bod y el se. Ju st l i ke t h e f i sh er m an ?s w i f e d i d n ?t m at t er t o t h e

w as i n d i sp u tabl e, an d

y ou n g w om an ou t si d e t h e p h ar m acy,

d esp i te h er m od est cl oth i n g, sh e f ool ed n on e

at

of

l ef t on ly w i t h sp ecu l at i on s as t o t h e

sh ou l d er . U n f or tu n ately, h er beau t y w as as i t

t o t h e i m agi n at i on

sp ect at or , sh e w ou l d con t i n u e h er l i f e,

p l aced

ar ou n d th e h an d bag h an gi n g f r om h er r ad i an t

Ju st l i ke t h at , h er ex i st en ce w as r ed u ced si t t i n g

w om an w as stan d i n g agai n st th e w al l of th e p h ar m acy

p h ar m acy, t h e y ou n g w om an w as gon e.

by.

th e

sp ect at or

d i d n ?t

m at t er

to

th e

u n f or t u n at e Sr . A r m an d o. N on e of t h em

D esp er ate f or even th e br i ef est m om en t

even k n ew abou t t h e ex i st en ce of t h e

of h er atten ti on , th ey sw ar m ed ar ou n d h er l i ke bees to h on ey, star v i n g f or a taste of beau ty, f or a gl an ce i n to h eaven s ey es. A s th ei r r ep eated ad van ces tow ar d s h er w er e ju st as r ep eated ly i gn or ed , al l

49

ot h er s, excep t f or t h e sp ect at or at L a Pi ed r a, w h o k n ew abou t t h e ex i st en ce of t h em al l .


A r tw or k : Joh n Ru ssel l 50


A r t w or k : L aw r en ce B r i d ges 51


W at er i s t h e D r i v i n g Fo r ce o f al l N at u r e El ean or Sw an son W h en on ce y ou h ave tasted f l i gh t, y ou w i l l f or ever w al k th e ear th w i th y ou r ey es t u r n ed sk y w ar d , f or th er e y ou h ave been , an d th er e y ou w i l l alw ay s l on g to r et u r n . 1452- 1519

W h er e d o th e f r eed bi r d s go at n i gh t , af ter I r el ease th em f r om th ei r cages? I , L eon ar d o d i ser Pi er o d a V i n ci w i sh n o h ar m to an y an i m al . I d o n ot eat th em or w an t th em t o be i n cap ti v i ty. I i m agi n e t h ei r f r eed om i n f l i gh t, an d som eti m es t h i n k to m ap i t, bu t th at i s a betr ay al of th ei r sover ei gn ty to soar th r ou gh t h e sk i es as th ey p l ease, as f ar as th ey m ay. T h ey n ow bel on g to n o on e bu t th ei r f eath er ed com r ad es. I w i l l n ot p ai n t tod ay, bu t w i l l w or k on d r aw i n g a m ap of a w ater sh ed , ju st begu n ? a bi r d ?s ey e v i ew of p ar t of T u scan y. W h en th i s task i s com p l ete I w i l l h ave d r aw n th r ee t op ogr ap h i c m ap s of T u scan y. I h ave r ecogn i zed th at w ater f l ow s over an d u n d er th e su r f ace of Ear th i n a p atter n , n ot u n l i ke h u m an vei n s. I w i l l u se w ash es of d i f f er en t i n ten si ti es t o f ol l ow th e con tou r s of m ou n tai n ch ai n s, d i f f er en t sh ad es r ep r esen ti n g d i f f er en t el evati on s, an d w i l l p i ctu r e t h e r i ver s, val l ey s, an d settl em en ts i n a r eal i sti c m an n er .

52


M y f asci n ati on w i th l an d scap es can be r ecogn i zed i n sever al of m y cel ebr ated p ai n ti n gs. M an y h ave n oti ced w i th cu r i osi ty an d i n tr i gu e th e w i n d i n g r oad , th e br i d ge, th e l akes an d m ou n tai n s beh i n d th e M on a L i sa. I f I am r em em ber ed f or n oth i n g el se, I h ave r ep eated ly r ecogn i zed i n al l of m y w or k th at w ater i s th e d r i v i n g f or ce of al l n atu r e. U l ti m ately, i t m u st be u n d er stood th at i n r i ver s, f or a p r i m e ex am p l e, th e w ater y ou tou ch i s th e l ast of w h at h as p assed an d th e f i r st of th at w h i ch com es. So w i th p r esen t ti m e.

A r t w or k : Joh n Ru ssel l 53


54


Fr esh l y B ak ed B r ead Ph y l i ss M er i on Sh an ken ?H ap p y

bi r th d ay,

M om !?

Car ol ?s

?O h .? Car ol cou gh ed .

si n g- son g voi ce cam e th r ou gh M om ?s

?A r e y ou ok ay, h on ey ??

k i tch en sp eaker p h on e. ?Yes. I ju st cl ear ed m y t h r oat . I ?m n ot ?O h , Car ol , I ?m gl ad i t?s y ou , h on ey. I w as

dying

goi n g to cal l you ton i gh t becau se I w an t ed

or

an y t h i n g.

U n l ess

t h er e?s

som et h i n g I d on ?t k n ow y et . I s i t ok ay i f I

t o tel l y ou th at D ad an d I h ave a p r esen t

d on ?t t ake ad v an t age of y ou r gi f t ju st y et ?

f or y ou .?

I h ave p l an s.?

?Bu t, M om , I t?s your bi r th d ay ! I ? ?

?D eat h i s so m u ch w or k . T h er e?s t h e

?W e ar e gi v i n g y ou ou r cem et er y p l ot s.

an n ou n cem en t s an d r ef r esh m en ts ...?

T h er e?s tw o. You ?ll sh ar e w i t h y ou r si st er .?

Car ol t u n ed ou t, r esor t i n g t o h er ol d t r i ck

?H u h ??

of cl am p i n g h er l i p s t ogeth er w i t h h er t h u m b an d f or ef i n ger .

?W e ju st f i n i sh ed p ay i n g th em of f . T h e p ap er s cam e tod ay.? M om gi ggl ed . ?T h en

?W e?d h ave t o sh i p ou r bod i es back t o

you cal l ed !?

B ost on . T h e d i gger w ou l d t ake u s f or a r i d e. Cof f i n s ar e w ay t oo ex p en si ve. O h ,

?A r eal coi n ci d en ce.?

t h en ?O h , Car ol ! D on ?t be sar casti c. T h i s i s

t h er e?s t h e st on e. I t cou l d

t h ou san d s.

i m p or t an t. I ?m ol d an d h ave to t h i n k

T h ey

t ook

ad v an t age

run of

M ar gar et w h en B ob d i ed . Sh e sh ou l d

abou t th ese th i n gs. You ?ll see. I t w i l l

h ave f i gu r ed i t ou t ah ead of t i m e l i ke

h ap p en to y ou , too, som ed ay.?

w e?r e d oi n g. Rem em ber w h en M op si e d i ed , w e d i d n ?t k n ow h ow t o get r i d of

?Su r e, M om ! I can ?t w ai t .?

h er !?

?D ad an d I w i l l be cr em at ed . I t?s easi er

?M om ! T h at ?s so cr u el . L i ke ever y d ay, I

t h at w ay.?

st i l l get a p an g. W h y d i d w e m ove aw ay

?Ri gh t . T h i s i s a l ot to take i n . U m . W h at

an d l eave M op si e bu r i ed i n t h e back y ar d ?

w i l l h ap p en to th e ash es??

W e sh ou l d h ave d u g h er u p an d taken ?T h ey get th r ow n i n th e ocean .?

h er w i t h u s t o t h e n ew h ou se.?

?M om , w h o?s su p p osed to d o th at ??

Si l en ce.

?I gu ess I w i l l .?

W i t h ou t t h i n k i n g, Car ol bl u r ted ou t , ?I

?Bu t, M om , y ou ?ll be d ead .?

w an t t h e ash es, M om . B e su r e I get t h e ash es.? I f Car ol d i d n ?t p u t h er f oot d ow n

?W el l , y es, I m ean t i f y ou r f ath er d i es

n ow, h er m oth er w ou l d p r obably h an d

f i r st.?

of f D ad ?s ash es t o som e str an ger .

A r t w or k : M ar y K am er er 55


56


Car ol i m agi n ed th e i n ter ch an ge:

?Car ol , y ou r t h i n gs.

M om, where?s D addy?s ashes?

Do

m oth er y ou

i s r u sh i n g i n t o

act u al ly

w an t

th e

cem eter y p l ot s?? M om: M r. H utchins was on his way to drop his wife?s ashes into the ocean so I asked if, he would do me a huge favor and while he was at it, would he drop off your father?s ashes. After all, he would be going there anyway. I f not, I would have to put them in tin foil and suppose

?I k i n d a h aven ?t h ad t i m e t o t h i n k abou t i t .? ?I s i t ok ay w i t h y ou i f w e get cr em at ed ?? ?W h at ever y ou w an t , D ad d y, bu t m ake su r e I get t h e ash es.?

some of the ashes leaked out and the dust got on the coffee table? And suppose, before I had a chance to shoo all the dust away with my

Car ol ?s m oth er ch i m ed i n . ?O k ay, y ou get t h e ash es.?

feather duster, someone dropped in for a visit?

Car ol r et or ted , ?Yes!!! N ow I get t h e

T hey would think I ?m lazy cause I didn?t even

cem eter y p l ot s and y ou t h r ew i n t h e

clean up.

ash es as a bon u s. I ?m p sy ch ed !?

Carol would say: And what if you opened the

In

door for the UPS guy and a draft blew the

excl am ati on f r om M om , D ad r ai sed h i s

ashes around and everyone got covered with

voi ce i m p at i en t ly. ?M ar y, r egu l ar f u n er al s

soot?

ar e n ot t h at h ar d t o ar r an ge. Cr em at i on i s

And M om would say, D on?t be fresh, Carol. ?I h op e I d i e bef or e y ou r f ath er d oes so h e can

take car e of

th i n gs. I t?s t oo

com p l i cat ed f or m e. T h er e h e?d be, al l Freshly D ead, an d w h at w ou l d I d o w i th

r esp on se

to

an

i n d i st i n gu i sh abl e

n ot t h e on ly an sw er ! ? For get ti n g h er sel f , Car ol r et or ted , ?Sor r y t o cau se y ou al l so m u ch t r ou bl e. Sen d M r . H u t ch i n s t o t h e ocean f or m e, w i l l y a!?

h i s bod y ?? I n an al ar m ed w h i sp er , M om

D ad ch u ck l ed , al t h ou gh Car ol cou l d n ?t

sai d , ?N ever m i n d . H er e com es D ad .

i m agi n e h ow h e even got t h e joke.

D on ?t tel l h i m w h at I sai d .?

?W el l , I cal l ed t o w i sh y ou a h ap p y

Cl an gi n g p ots p i er ced Car ol ?s ear s.

bi r t h d ay, M om , an d i n stead , y ou gave me

Sh e w el com ed D ad ?s d eep , r asp y voi ce, ?W h at?s th at I h ear d abou t bei n g f r esh ly

a gi f t, som et h i n g I alw ay s w an t ed ? cem eter y p l ot s. Sor r y t o be an u n gr atef u l d au gh t er . T h an k y ou .?

d ead ?? ?N o, D ad , M om w as tal k i n g abou t h er f r esh ly baked br ead .?

?You ?ll sh ar e t h em w i t h y ou r si st er .? "I f w e bot h d i e at t h e sam e t i m e, w e can d o a si d e- by - si d e! I can h ar d ly w ai t. W e

?B r ead , I d on ?t see an y br ead .?

? ? D esp i te

M om 's

u tt er an ces

in

th e

back gr ou n d , D ad scol d ed h er : ?Bu t y ou d on ?t even k n ow i f sh e w an t s th e p l ots, M ar y ! Car ol , Car ol , ar e y ou th er e?? ?St i l l h er e, D ad d y.?

D ad br oke i n , ?N o st r i n gs at t ach ed , Car ol . You d o w h at y ou w an t w i t h t h em . U se t h em or sel l t h em .? ? A f t er t h e good - by es an d ?I l ove y ou ?s,? Car ol h u n g u p t h e p h on e. 57


Sh e

sm i l ed

w h ack y t y p i cal

as sh e

con ver sati on of

h er

r ev i ew ed

th e

an d ar r an gi n g, su ch a h assl e, d y i n g

w h i ch

w as

can be h ar d er t h an l i v i n g bu t at l east

ever y d ay

y ou get t o d i e i n p eace ? bu t on ly i f

f am i ly ?s

eccen tr i ci ti es. A s u su al , sh e h u m or ed

y ou p l an ah ead ?

h er sel f : T h an k s to m y f ol k s, I d on ?t

t h i n k abou t t h i s even bef or e y ou ar e

h ave to w or r y abou t w h er e to bu r y

bor n . A s M om w ou l d say, ?I t ?s k i n d of

my

en ou gh

l i ke bak i n g br ead . You h ave t o h ave

f i n d i n g sh el ter w h i l e y ou ?r e al i ve;

ever y t h i n g com p l et ely r ead y bef or e

who

y ou p u t t h e l oaf i n t h e oven !?

ow n

bod y. I t?s h ar d

n eed s

th e

r esp on si bi l i ty

of

d i ggi n g y ou r ow n gr ave? A r r an gi n g

58

an d on ly i f y ou


A r t w or k : Rex M au r i ce O p p en h ei m er

59


H o l d i n g H an d s W ad e Gr ei ten

W e bou gh t som e gas ju gs at t h e

r esp on d , bu t sh e al so d i d n ?t p u l l

h ar d w ar e stor e an d f i l l ed th em u p

aw ay. I h ad t o m ake su r e of i t .

at th e A r co?s on th e ou tsk i r t s of tow n . Sh e sai d w e n eed ed t o h ave a test r u n . W e d r ove ou t i n t o t h e

?Can I k i ss y ou ?? I asked . Sh e d i d n ?t say an y t h i n g as sh e w at ch ed t h e f i r e, d i d n ?t t u r n h er h ead .

d eser t al on g th e f r on tage r oad , m e f i d d l i n g w i th th e r ad i o, tr y i n g t o get

h er

i n to

me

m u si c,

h op i n g

w ou l d

p ay

star ted ,

N ovem ber

of f

an d

th r ou gh

sh e sai d , even t u al ly.

Rai n

?M e n ei t h er ,? I sai d . W e l ooked ou t

th e

sol o

at t h e f l am es. T h e w i n d w h i st l ed

i gn or i n g

m e,

t h r ou gh t h e v al l ey.

on ce

h er

my

?I d on ?t t h i n k t h at ?s a good i d ea,?

l ook i n g back an d f or th acr oss t h e

?L et ?s go,? sh e sai d .

sagebr u sh an d th e d i r t, sear ch i n g W h en I got h om e, I p assed m y

f or th e r i gh t sp ot.

m om ?T h er e,? sh e sai d , p oi n ti n g t o a bl ock of con cr ete i n th e d i st an ce. W e p ar ked on th e si d e of th e r oad an d str od e ou t to i t, gas ju gs i n h an d . W e

p ou r ed

on e

of

cook i n g d i n n er , an d

st ep - d ad O r d er ; r eser ved

w at ch i n g ou r

living

al m ost

my

L aw

And

r oom

w as

excl u si vely

f or

N ew Yor k ?s m ost sen si t i ve cr i m es.

th e th e

?T h at ?s h ow t h ey op er at e,? h e?d say

con cr ete. Sh e p u l l ed ou t a B i c,

f r om t h e cou ch as h e w or ked h i s

f l i ck i n g i t w i th h er f i n ger as sh e

w ay t h r ou gh t h e vod k a h e bou gh t

l ooked at m e, h er sh or ts a bi t

at Cost co. ?T h at ?s h ow t h ey get

sh or t, h er

a bi t l op si d ed ,

y ou .? W e d i d n ?t k n ow w h at h e

l ook i n g l i ke sh e k n ew h ow t h e

m ean t , or w h o h e si d ed w i t h . H e

w or l d w or ked .

h at ed t h e ?p ed s? an d y ou sh ou l d

sm al l er

on es

ou t

gr i n

on to

n ever d i sr esp ect a w om an , h e sai d , We

w atch ed

obl i v i ou s to

th e

f l am es gr ow,

th e d r y

br u sh

to

ei th er si d e, r evel i n g i n h ow w e d i d n ?t car e abou t th i n gs. A s t h e h eat h i t ou r f aces, I got cl oser t o h er , tr i ed to h ol d h er h an d . M y h an d

br u sh ed

h er s. Sh e d i d n ?t

60

bu t m y m om an d I st i l l f el t l i ke t h er e w as som e sor t of al l egi an ce bei n g m i sp l aced . I w en t t o m y r oom , san k i n t o m y ch ai r , t u r n ed on m y m on i t or , t ou ch ed m y sel f absen t ly.


W e d r ove ou t to th e br i d ge a f ew

h an d ed m e som e m at ch es an d I

d ay s l ater . Sam w as w ear i n g jean s

got i t on t h e f i r st t r y. T h e f i r e l eap t

an d sn eaker s, an d a sh i r t w i th l i tt l e

u p i n st an t ly, l i ke i t h ad alw ay s

or an ge

been

f l ow er s

on

i t.

I

kep t

t h er e.

I

back p ed al ed ,

gl an ci n g at h er w h en ever I cou l d ,

w at ch i n g t h e f l am es su r ge acr oss

bu t sh e h ad h er h ead r esti n g on

t h e br i d ge. I cou l d n ?t t u r n aw ay

h er h an d an d w as star i n g ou t of

f r om i t . I cou l d n ?t t u r n f r om t h e

th e p assen ger w i n d ow at th e tow n

f u r y of i t .

r u sh i n g by.

?Com e on ,? Sam

sai d , an d sh e

W e got th er e as th e su n w as setti n g

y an ked h ar d on m y ar m . I t u r n ed

an d

a l i ttl e w ay s aw ay

an d w e r an aw ay, d i v i n g beh i n d

d ow n a r esi d en ti al str eet. W e?d h ad

som e bu sh es at t h e l i p of t h e

a br i ef

th e

r av i n e t h at t h e br i d ge sp an n ed .

p ar ti cu l ar s on th e w ay. I f el t i n m y

W e w at ch ed t h e p i l l ar s of f i r e,

bon es th at th e on ly th i n g to d o

sm el l ed t h e ch ar r ed asp h al t , f el t

w as to sp el l ou r n am es i n gasol i n e.

t h e i m m ed i acy of t h e m om en t

Sam r esp on d ed to str en gth , an d

car r i ed al on g by t h e w ar m w i n d ,

sh e agr eed . H er n am e w as sh or t ,

w h i sp er i n g t o u s t h at ou r l i ves

an d sh e k n ew h ow to d o th ese

st r et ch ed on i n t er m i n ably i n f r on t

th i n gs. T h e w al k al on g th e r oad t o

of u s.

p ar ked

con ver sati on

abou t

th e br i d ge car r y i n g ou r gas ju gs took a l on g ti m e.

I r each ed f or h er h an d agai n . T h i s t i m e I f el t h er f i n ger s cu r l ar ou n d

W h en w e got to th e br i d ge, Sam

m i n e. H er h an d s w er e w ar m an d

got h er th r ee l etter s d ow n l i ke a

sw eat y. I w at ch ed as car s cam e t o a

p r of essi on al

st op at ei t h er si d e of t h e br i d ge.

w atch

me

an d w or k .

cam e over I

got

a

to bi t

Peop l e

w er e ou t

of

t h ei r

car ,

over eager . I m ad e th e C an d th e H

l ook i n g ar ou n d , d azed . Som eon e

a bi t too bi g, an d th e R w as al r ead y

t h r ew u p t h ei r ar m s an d got back

str etch i n g m y r esou r ces. By th e

i n t h ei r car . O u t of t h e cor n er of

ti m e I got to th e S, I w as ou t. I saw

m y ey e, I cou l d see Sam gr i n n i n g

a car i n th e d i stan ce an d p an i cked ,

at m e an d I f el t m y sel f sm i l i n g i n

p ou r i n g th e r est ou t i n a sp l ash .

t h e d eep en i n g d u sk as t h e w or l d

Sam l au gh ed an d ju m p ed aw ay so

br oke bef or e u s f or ju st a f ew

i t w ou l d n ?t get on h er cl oth es. Sh e

su m m er m om en t s.

61


T h ey Say Rach el N ol an h e w as d ead as a d oor n ai l h e w as d ead i n t h e w at er h e w as d ead bef or e h e h i t th e gr ou n d h e w as m or e d ead t h an al i ve h e d i ed f i gh ti n g i n m y ar m s h e d i ed bef or e h e k n ew i t h e d i ed f r om su sp en se th e w ai t k i l l ed h i m th ey say h e k i cked th e bu cket h e d i ed w i t h h i s boot s on h e h ad on e f oot i n th e gr ave th ey say i t w as a f ate w or se th an d eat h h e d r op p ed t h e bod y i n st ead of gi v i n g u p th e gh ost h e w en t t h e w ay of al l f l esh h e joi n ed t h e gr eat m ajor i ty h e m ad e t h e u l t i m at e sacr i f i ce th ey say h e m et h i s m aker h e?s sn u f f ed ou t h e?s t ak i n g a d i r t n ap h e?s w or m f ood h e bi t th e d u st ash es t o ash es h e cr ossed t h e r i ver

A r tw or k : L i ly O l i n

h e r od e th e p al e h or se h e t ook t h e l ast t r ai n t o gl or y t h ey say

62


A r t w or k : K i er a Stu ar t

63


cl u t ch i n g at l ov e Gr ace Cl ai r e w h en i th i n k of y ou i r em em ber su n n y d ay s si tti n g u n d er an oak tr ee, p op p i n g r asp ber r i es w i t h ou r t on gu es ou r l i ves bal an ced on th e ti p of an ap p l e p i p h ow i th r ead ed y ou a d ai sy ch ai n n oose & br u sh ed asi d e y ou r h ai r t o k n ot i t ar ou n d y ou r t h r oat con f i d ed p ar ti al secr ets, l et y ou t h i n k y ou ?d k n ow ever y t h i n g h i d th e m ess th at scar ed m e beh i n d a m agi ci an ?s scr een . i f m y h ear t?s an or an ge, i gave y ou on ly t h e r i n d : th e p eel ed of f p i eces i t d i d n ?t h u r t t o l ose y ou w er en ?t th e sor t to tr ace y ou r f i n ger s al on g t h e ex p osed f l esh get m essy i n th e sti ck y ju i ce so y ou w er e h ap p y w i th m y scr ap s & i w as h ap p y w i th m y l i es h ow d o i say y ou w er en ?t en ou gh f or m e w i t h ou t bei n g a m on st er ? w i th ou t bei n g th at cal l ou s cr eat u r e ever y on e w r i t es t h ei r p oem s abou t ? h ow d o i say i n eed ed som eon e w h o cou l d h an d l e al l of m e, n ot ju st th e p ar ts i ?d cl ean ed an d d i sp l ay ed i n a f r u i t bow l ?

64


K eep sak e # 5 L eah H ol br ook Sackett

I t's ti m e f or ch eck- i n , w h i ch I m u st d o d ai ly. I can 't l et an y m or e sl i p aw ay. # 1 y ou r l ock of h ai r i s sti l l bl on d e an d sof t . You w ou l d be gr ay i n g or bal d i n g by n ow. W er e y ou h er e, y ou m i gh t w an t t h i s. I br u sh i t acr oss m y l i p s th en I p u t i t back i n t h e Z i p l oc baggy. # 2 y ou r ear r i n g, a d r agon 's tal on cl u tch i n g a bead of bl ack on y x . I p i er ce m y l obe an d gr i m ace i n th e m i r r or . T h i s i s som et h i n g I w ou l d n ever w ear . # 3 t i cket stu bs to W estsi d e Stor y. I com p l ai n ed t h er e w as t oo m u ch d an ci n g. # 4 a Fr i sbee. L et's ad m i t i t y ou w er e a l ou sy t each er . # 5 y ou r f oot . I k n ow i t i s i n ev i tabl e, th e r ot, bu t i t's th e on ly p ar t of y ou I kep t . I Googl ed h ow t o f r eeze- d r y f l ow er s; i t w as som e h el p t o st au n ch t h e sm el l . I n t h e en d , w h en y ou r p i n k y toe f el l of f , I vacu u m seal ed t h e f oot an d p u t i t i n m y d eep f r eeze. D on 't d ou bt, I w i l l see y ou t om or r ow. T h e sen ten ce. I t sou n d s m u n d an e. Yet , I f eel m y l i f e bei n g st r i p p ed aw ay f r om m e l i ke th e r el ease f r om bei n g t ar r ed an d f eat h er ed , t h e cu r e i s w or se th an th e k i l l . T h e i n n ocu ou s t h u d of t h e secon d - h an d p u sh es m e tow ar d th e en d . I am th e p ar i ah , w h o cou l d an sw er m y p eer s? L i f e i s ti gh t i n th i s m i n t gr een cel l . T h e col or t h e on ly sem bl an ce of l i f e. I u se to w or k cr ossw or d p u zzl es to keep m y m i n d sh ar p . Bu t t h at en sn ar es y ou w i th f ei gn ed h op e, a l on g n oose ar ou n d t h e col l ar . N o m or e ap p eal s w ash aw ay m y m em or i es an d d r eam s. W i t h ou t m y keep sakes, t h er e i s n oth i n g to keep u s togeth er . I h ave t oo m u ch t i m e.

A r t w or k : A n gel a D agosti n o

65


66


67


B eau t y T i p s, T r i ck s & H ack s Tex t an d ar tw or k : Beth M cCoy

Gr oom cu r ly l i p l i n er Pol i sh st r ai gh t l i p st i ck W or k ou t gl ow i n g ey e l i n er Col or sof t m ascar a Sh ave sm oot h f ou n d at i on M oi stu r i ze p l u m p sh ad ow Ex p ose m oi st sk i n Sm i l e st r ai gh t h ai r T r i m w h i t e beau t y r ou t i n e St y l e cl ean ey es Sp en d y ou t h f u l l i p s Gr oom st y l i sh t eet h Pol i sh good f i t t i n g l egs W or k ou t p ol i sh ed f eet Col or f i l l ed cl ot h es Sh ave m an i cu r ed accessor i es M oi stu r i ze w el l - gr oom ed h ai r sp r ay Ex p ose sm oot h h ose Sm i l e cu t e h i gh h eel s T r i m p r et t y p u r ses Sty l e beau t i f u l coat s Sp en d cu r ly jacket s Gr oom st r ai gh t sh oes Pol i sh gl ow i n g jew el r y W or k ou t sof t n ai l s Col or sm oot h l ook Sh ave p l u m p gel

68


Go Rab i d Fai t h Cassan d r a M oss

I t w as r equ i r ed of m e to sp eak , To u tter , To vocal i se M y th ou gh ts, to Rei f y n o th i n g i n to th i n g an d T r an sf er som eth i n g of m y sel f f r om I n si d e to ou tsi d e an d I ... ? an d th er e i n th e cr ev i ce of th e p l asti c t abl ecl ot h , t h er e i n t h e or an ge f l ow er p ots an d y el l ow p etal s I star ed as y ou sai d y ou d i d n ?t k n ow w h at t h e m atter w as w i th y ou r ey e, i n w h i ch a r ed n ess h ad sp r ead f r om p u p i l t o cor n er . T h e T V f u zzed , d r egs of n ew s ben eat h . I t w as t h e l ast d ay s of au tu m n , n ow h er e l ef t to tu r n as th e l i gh t w as d ar ken i n g w i t h t h e n i gh t ?s l ow er i n g. W or d l essn ess w as am on gst u s an d I th ou gh t: I can n ot f eel ; I th ou gh t: bu t I sh ou l d tel l y ou h ow f r equ en t ly I f eel m y ow n absen ce; I th ou gh t: I d on ?t r em em ber cl ean l i n ess, bu t, an d so, w i th al l m y bacter i al over h au l s, al l th e com i n gs an d goi n gs of h op e, f ear , joy, sh am e, r el i ef , d r ead , h or r or , p r i d e, d i sbel i ef , gu i l t , p l easu r e, l oath i n g, w ou l d n ?t th er e be a w i l l to f or ce th e p ar si n g of su ch i n n er n ess, t o m ake t h e u n k n ow n k n ow n to th ose bef or e m e w h o n eed i t m ost ?

69


A r t w or k : A n d r ea Jon es

70


You com p l ai n ed abou t y ou r cap p u cci n o: i t h ad n ?t got t h e t ast e of t h e r eal . A p p ar en tly, th er e?d been a st abbi n g r ou n d h er e t h e ot h er w eek . T h e cou p l e n ex t to u s d i scu ssed w h at sh ou l d be d on e abou t t h e m an ?s si ster , w h o h ad attacked th ei r m ot h er an d st ol en h er m on ey. T h ei r con ver sati on w as a d ogm a. I t su cked m e i n , I w h o?d alw ay s been w ai ti n g f or a r evel ati on , w h i l st y ou r egar d ed m e, y ou r ey e an u p si d e- d ow n su n set, u n f u l f i l l ed an d ex p ect an t . I n t h e d oct r i n e I r ecei ved a w ay : th at w h i ch i s sai d can n ot be u n sai d . ?Cu t h er of f .? ?Bu t? ? ?I t?s m e or h er .? ?I can ?t.? ?D o y ou val u e h er m or e th an m e? D o y ou ?? You see, th e w om an , h er f l esh sal l ow, h er voi ce st r on g, r em oved si l en ce. A ch oi ce w as n ow w h er e i t h ad been . T w o ex i st en t op t i on s. Each m ean i n g a d i sti n ct r eal i ty. I cou l d t el l y ou d i d n ?t m u ch car e f or th e ser m on . M oi stu r e f or m ed i n th e cr ook of y ou r d et er i or at i n g ey e, tr y i n g to cl ean se th e p r obl em . O u r si t u at i on w as sp r ead i n g, seek i n g f u r th er sp aces to f i l l . I th ou gh t: f ai th i s a r abi d sp l een t h at ?s p r obably saf er t o l i ve w i t h ou t . I t w as r equ i r ed of m e to state th e m atter , to p u t f or th m y op i n i on on w h at w as or w asn ?t betw een u s bu t I cou l d n ?t bel i eve w h at I d i d n ?t k n ow an d so I d i d n ot sp eak .

A r t w or k : Rober t M cN al ly

71


72


A r t w or k : L i n d say M er w i n

73


C o l l ect i v e I n h al e Sar a Gr i m es

T h e sof t th u d of f eet m y f eet on t h e p avem en t T h e bu zz of a h u m m i n gbi r d T h e gu ttu r al cl am or of a cr ow T h e br eath su cked i n acr oss r ow s an d r ow s of h ou ses bar s an d caf es A ci ti es l u n g f or on ce w i th ou t t h e t i gh t en i n g of ex h au st A col l ecti ve i n h al e as th e ci t y h ol d s i t s br eat h Sh el ter i n p l ace W i l l th at be th e ed i ct of th e d ay ? M etal l i c cl i ck a ch i l d 's bi ke sh u t t l es by Pee w ee: th e si ze of d og tet h er ed t o l eash T h e p ar k i s th e on ly si gn of h u m an i t y Au d aci ou s i n i ts i n si sten ce T h e or d er i s h el d of f A col l ecti ve ex h al e

74


am b l y o p i a K ay l a Fr an ces M u r r ay w h at p r esen ts i tsel f to l oss? i s i t si l h ou ettes of ever gr een s casti n g sh ad ow s, or p ear ju i ce d r i p p i n g d ow n m y ch i n an d n avel i n si d e of an or an ge cr eam sk y ? O ?ep i t h el i u m . w h i ch ex p er i en ces w i l l sti ck l i ke gu m beh i n d m y f l esh ? d ar k n ess an d teeth gn ash i n g i n a bu r n t op al t eacu p - l i gh tp l ay of m y m i n d ?s ey e? si m i l ar ly, i t cou l d be a k al ei d oscop e of m om en t s, gath er i n g togeth er to sh ap e th e cl ou d s, l i gh tn ess an d v i ol ets an d i n d i go an d au bu r n i n each d r op l et th at p ool s i n m y can t h u s bef or e d i ssi p ati n g. I take a con vex l en s to l ar ge- p r i n t book s on m y sti ci sm an d to on es on l etti n g go- l i ke l ook i n g f or l i ttl e bu gs i n th e gr ass. I take u p m y ow n sp ace w i th gr ace w h i l e I k n ow I can . m y p ar tn er takes to w h i ttl i n g d r i f tw ood an d I take to r esti n g agai n st h i s th r oat an d al l ow m y sel f to f eel h i s en er gy abou t th e th i n gs h e cap tu r es; an d al l ow m y sel f to f eel h i s accen ted voi ce. I l i ck sal tw ater f r om m y l i p s an d m y ton gu e coal esces w i th h i s an d t h er e i s a w ave, an d w e ar e i n th e ocean , an d th e star s ar e above, an d w e ar e d ep r i ved of ou r sen ses. M y ey es op en w i th su n sp ots p r esen t, an d I am i n th e tal l gr ass, an d i t w as on e of h i s n egati ves an d th e con stel l ati on s w er e m y n eu r al p at h w ay s ou t of l i n e of si gh t. an ocu l ar can ?t m easu r e w h at i s en d l ess.

75


A r t w or k : Cassan d r a H am i l ton

76


77


A n A p p ar at u s f o r t h e A f t er m at h M aggi e Gal e I

am

setti n g

ou t

to

d esi gn

ap p ar atu s. H av i n g n ever

an

d esi gn ed

an y th i n g bef or e, I k n ow th i s w i l l be a m i gh ty ch al l en ge. T h er e ar e som e basi c

ar ch i tectu r al ,

em p i r i cal

an d

f u n cti on al qu al i ti es I h ave i n m i n d f or m y ap p ar atu s. Fi r st an d f or em ost , I w an t i t to be com f or tabl e, n ot cu m ber som e. You k n ow, good f or p r acti cal , ever y d ay u se. T h e ap p ar atu s w i l l

w ou l d l i ke i t t o be m or e r ef i n ed th an t h at of a m osqu i t o n et . A r m h ol es w i t h bu i l t - i n gl oves w i l l be m easu r ed an d af f i xed , t h r ou gh w h i ch I cou l d sh op f or m y essen t i al s. T h e m at er i al sh ou l d be p or ou s en ou gh f or m e t o sen si bly assess t h e qu al i t y of m y f r u i t s an d veget abl es, bu t n ot t oo p or ou s t h at i t ex p oses m y sk i n , l eav i n g i t v u l n er abl e. I sh ou l d be abl e

be

of

t o p i ck u p a t om at o an d h ol d t h e

cou r se, w i th a ci r cu m f er en ce t h at

w ei gh t of i t i n m y h an d , d el i cat ely

cr eates a 6- f oot bar r i er betw een m y

p r essi n g on t h e sk i n t o ch eck f or

bod y an d th e ou tsi d e- m ost ed ges.

br u i si n g an d f i r m n ess.

T h e basi c con str u cti on

r ou n d

sh ou l d be

com p osed of a l i gh t- w ei gh t m et al . I f i gu r ed , th at w ay i t w i l l h ave a st u r d y str u ctu r e an d an ou ter sh el l on w h i ch I

can

f asten

som e

kind

of

tr an sp ar en t, br eath abl e m ater i al .

W h en

I

th at i t w ou l d n ?t m ake m e h ot , I d on ?t l i ke to be h ot an d I get h ot easi ly. I n eed to be abl e to see ou t an d br eat h cl ear ly, w i th ou t obstr u cti on . I h esi t at e to say th e w or d m esh , becau se I

th e

p ot en t i al

obst acl es I cou l d en cou n t er , I k n ow I w ou l d w an t t h e ap p ar at u s t o be easi ly col l ap si bl e, l i ke a st r ol l er f or a baby. I t sh ou l d be qu i ck t o br eak d ow n an d assem bl e,

T h i s m ater i al sh ou l d be th i n en ou gh

con si d er

w i t h ou t

cau si n g

an y

u n n ecessar y f r u st r at i on . I w an t t o en su r e t h at I h u m an i ze t h e ap p ar at u s

as

m u ch

as

p ossi bl e,

m ay be by p ai n t i n g i t a sof t , n at u r al t on e. I st i l l w an t p eop l e t o be abl e t o see m e, n ot m y ap p ar at u s.

A r tw or k : Ju d y M en sch

78


79


W el l - f ed L oi sa Fen i ch el l I m ean th at I h ad ju st r ecei ved a n ew ty p e of h ai r cu t . I m ean th at I h ad been l i st en i n g t o son gs th r ou gh ou t th e d ay & h ad h ear d ver y l i ttl e. I m ean t h at I w as w ai t i n g f or w h en f r i gh t becam e t h at w h i ch got r ol l ed i n t o t h e l oaf of br ead m ol d y i n m y r ef r i ger at or . O n e f r i en d say s th at th e ti m e h as com e n ow to r ead th e bi bl e. A n ot h er t el l s m e to r esear ch Bu d d h i sm . I m ean t h at I am l ook i n g over m y sh ou l d er , f i n al ly i n to p r op er d i r ect i on . I m ean t h at even w h en I gr ow f ever i sh w i t h sad n ess I can p l ace m y tr u st i n t o a gen t l e k i n d of l an gu age. A str an ger on th e su bw ay on ce t ol d m e: th e sou l i s th e f i r st t o begi n t o r ot . I t h as been sai d bef or e, by t h ose m u ch w i ser th an I , th at on ce I am at ease, i t i s t h en th at I w i l l be l oved , l i ke t h ose ch i cken car casses h an gi n g i n t h e m ar ket s of Ch i n atow n . L at er , t h ey ar e f r i ed f or d i n n er . A f am i ly eat s. Feel s h ap p y.

A r tw or k : A n d r ea Jon es 80


WRITERS Andres Cordoba is a Massachusetts born writer and graduate of SUNY Purchase. He has received honors such as the Ginny Wray Poetry prize, the Thayer Fellowship For the Arts, the Patricia Kerr Ross Award, and was named a 2019 Breakout 8 Writer in poetry by Epiphany: A Literary Journal. A real self-starter, a go-getter– a team player if you will– his mother refers to him as the Michael Jordan of mutual loss. Kent Wittenburg writes poetry and short fiction and enjoys taking photographs of water surfaces. He lives with his wife in Charlestown, Massachusetts, USA. Ania Catherine is an artist and director based in Los Angeles. James Ducat’s work has appeared or is forthcoming in CutBank, Apogee, Spoon River Poetry Review, Clockhouse, and others. He is associate professor of English at Riverside City College, California, where he co-advises MUSE, the literary magazine of RCC. He lives with his son and dog in a house painted pink. Denna Berg (she/her) is from Toronto, Canada, where she is a policy advisor by day focusing on public health equity. She is also a curator for Vintage by DD (@vintage.by.dd), an online vintage clothing store that focuses on non-binary designs and natural fibres. She is an emerging writer and her instagram is @denna.berg. Patrick T. Reardon is a three-time Pushcart Prize nominee. He is the author of eight books, including the poetry collection Requiem for David. His poetry has appeared in Esthetic Apostle, Rhino, Spank the Carp, Under a Warm Green Linden among many others. Gloria Heffernan is the author of the poetry collection, What the Gratitude List Said to the Bucket List, published by New York Quarterly Books (2019) and two chapbooks, Some of Our Parts, (Finishing Line Press) and Hail to the Symptom, (Moonstone Press). Her work appears in over sixty journals including Anchor, Chautauqua Literary Journal, Stone Canoe, Columbia Review, and The Healing Muse and Peregrine. B.L. Makiefsky is working on the completion of a book of short stories, many of which have been published in various literary magazines. In addition, his two-story collection, "Fathers and Sons," was selected as the winner of the 2012 Michigan Writers Cooperative Press chapbook contest. He lives in Traverse City, Michigan. Lesley Hebert lives in British Columbia, Canada. She teaches English to international students via Skype and writes web content, short stories and poetry. She has published travel articles in travelthruhistory.com and recently had a creative non-fiction piece published in Canadian Stories. Sandra Castiço is a short story writer from Portugal. She hasn't published any stories yet. Michael Chavinda is a Zimbabwean national that works in the US. He works as a Software Engineer and writes poetry in his free time. B.H. Pitt is a writer and poet living in San Diego, where he frequents open mic poetry nights. He studied Professional Writing at Champlain College in Burlington, VT. C. Gayle is an emerging writer who is fascinated with all things psychological. When she isn’t writing poems about the state of consciousness, issues of identity, or the general struggle of existence, she is exploring these ideas through research. Carolina is a PhD graduate student at Western University, London, Canada. (@carogayle) Molly Keegan is a Creative Writing Instructor with an MFA from Chatham University. Her poetry, nonfiction and fiction pieces have been published in creative garages facilitated by underdogs with gauges. Babitha Marina Justin is a poet, artist and academic from Kerala, South India and a Pushcart Prize nominee, 2018. Her poems have appeared in Eclectica , Esthetic Apostle, Fulcrum, The Scriblerus, Chaleur Magazine, Into the Void, Trampset, Inlandia , The Paragon Press, Adolphus Press, The Punch Magazine, Rise Up Review, Constellations, Cathexis NW Press, Silver Needle Press, About Place Journal, The Write Launch, Trampset, The Four Quarters Magazine, So to Speak journal, Kritya and Journal of Post-Colonial Literature. Her first collection of poetry, Of Fireflies, Guns and the Hills, was published by the Writers Workshop in 2015. The second collection, 'I Cook my Own Feast' was published


in 2019. Frank Geurrandeno is a poet and dad-joke enthusiast residing in Hardy, VA. His works can be found in Driftwood Press, Boston Literary Magazine, Cathexis Northwest Press, Haiku Journal, and elsewhere. Brennan Barney is a Creative Director residing in Michigan, USA. Recently his fiction "Maureen" was published in Whiskey Island Magazine. Josephine Blair is a 28-year-old New York-based writer and Brooklyn Poets fellow. Her poetry has been featured or is forthcoming in Copper Nickel, Epiphany Magazine, Yes, Poetry, Soliloquies Anthology, Allegory Ridge, and elsewhere. You can follow her at instagram.com/josephine_blair. Melissa LaDuc is a high school English teacher who lives in Tennessee. She loves trees and has a penchant for planting seeds. Malik Selle is a California based writer and actor. Having recently graduated from Emerson College, Malik earned his B.A. in literary studies and acting. His work has appeared in Stoneboat Literary Journal and The West Trade Review, and often deals with the fading nature of small-town Americana, as well as the trials of redemption. He currently lives in Los Angeles, not far from the La Brea Tar Pits. Mereshah Merybal, a 20-year-old English student from India, enjoys art, poetry, existential philosophy - and occasionally, cooking. Lena Rosing is a danish writer with a master of arts in journalism, who only recently started sharing from her archive of short stories, creative non-fiction and poetry. As a writer with an academic background in the social sciences, her short stories and poems tend to explore themes of Mind, Self and Society. Eleanor Swanson’s poetry and fiction are widely published, and she has won numerous awards for her work She has published three poetry collection and a fourth is to be released in 2021. Awards include an NEA Fellowship. Her first poetry collection was a finalist for the Colorado Book Award. Phyliss Merion Shanken is a retired psychologist and creative writing teacher, who has been published in psychological and literary journals, and weekly newspaper and magazine columns. In addition to her literary and poetry awards, she is author of SILHOUETTES OF WOMAN, as well as a number of plays. She has two novels, EYE OF IRENE, and THE HEART OF BOYNTON BEACH CLUB. Her memoir, CONVERSATIONS WITH PERFECT STRANGERS is the culmination of her life’s work. She was recently published in Dreamers Creative Writing, May 16, 2019; The Write Launch, June 2019 & September 2019; and Abstract Contemporary Expressions, August, 2019. Wade Greiten is an aspiring short story writer based in Los Angeles. When he's not writing, he spends his time climbing rocks, taking naps, and attempting to hold down a job. Rachel Nolan holds a BA in poetry from Hampshire College, edits poetry manuscripts for Green Writers Press, and acts as managing editor for Millennial Pulp Literary Magazine. Past accomplishments include being a finalist in jubilat’s Make a Chapbook Competition in 2017. Rachel’s work can most recently be found in Juste Milieu and is forthcoming from Duende and HOOT. Grace Claire writes character-driven short stories and poems that centre around the emotional subtleties and nuances of human interaction. Her explorations of gender, sexuality, and the business of being human draw on her own experiences, but also deal in themes relatable to people of all different walks of life. Leah Holbrook Sackett is an adjunct lecturer in the English department at the University of Missouri - St. Louis. This is also where she earned her M.F.A. Her short stories explore journeys toward autonomy and the boundaries placed on the individual by society, family, and self. Learn about her published fiction at LeahHolbrookSackett.com. Beth McCoy loves and has been doing political art for years. She studied literature and art and wanted to find a way to combine the two. She also does photography, mixed media and other forms of art as they inspire her. This poem is called "Beauty Tips". She made it for her "Killer Gorgeous" series of mixed media art. She took words from beauty advice literature and put them together randomly. The art pieces are a satire on following this advice. It is meant to expose the damage to young women done by beauty industry.


Cassandra Moss was born in Manchester, England. She lived in London for thirteen years, where she studied, worked in the film industry, taught English, and wrote fiction. Now she lives and writes by the sea in Dublin. Sara Grimes is a creative writer of 23 years. She was a writer and editor at the University of Washington's the Daily. She has her degree in Comparative History of Ideas from the University of Washington, Seattle. Her publications can be found on Untapped Cities Magazine and Transmedia SF. She is also a copywriter for vacation rental companies and non-profits. She lives in the irreperesible Pacific Northwest with her dog, Austen. Kayla Frances Murray is a developong voice in the poetry realm, based in the Southeastern US. She has been published in Plainsongs by Hastings College Press, Tiny Seed Literary Journal, and in Beyond Words' inaugural issue. Maggie Gale is a mother of two girls. In her odd bits of spare time, she enjoys creative writing. She has a Bachelor's Degree in English Language and Literature. Loisa Fenichell holds a B.A. from SUNY Purchase College, where she studied Creative Writing and Literature. Her work has been featured in various publications, such as Winter Tangerine Review, The Rising Phoenix Review, Porridge Magazine, and others. Her debut collection, 'all these urban fields,' was published this past July by nothing to say press. She will be pursuing an MFA from Saint Mary's College of California come Fall. She was born in a taxi and feels that this has had a major influence on her work.


VISUAL ARTISTS Cover art: Black Horseman of the Apocalypse by Quixote. Quixote is a multi-disciplinary artist pursuing a spiritual gestalt, or Wheel; religion, mysticism, the occult, social/political outsiders, and altered states of consciousness, as subject matter, are conduits within the struggle to balance and unify the gestalt: personal/collective identity as “roles”, acts of myth-making, survival and struggle, alter ego narratives, escapism and indulgence. If successful, it reveals the necessity and inevitability of creative energy as an inherently cyclical and self-generative process. Kimberly Jackson, Nightmare. Kimberly was born blind in Indiana, and continues today as Legally Blind, where her parents were advised to “Put her in an asylum for the blind and move on with your life.” Kimberly has lived in seven states from California to Massachusetts. Graduating with a B.A. in Fine Arts from Purdue University, and a BFA in Illustration and Animation from the Art Institute of Boston. She has been selling her work for three decades. John Russell, The Hallelujah Chorus; And I Beheld; What do you do if you can't speak the language. Since the age of five, John has been creating various forms of art. He studied art at Angelo State University in Texas and is a graduate of the New York Institute of Photography. He has repeatedly been featured in galleries and showcased in fine art exhibitions nationwide. Robert McNally, Going; Zietenhorst. Robert is an Artist from Gateshead (UK) who works predominantly with graphite and paper. His work has been exhibited internationally and features in a number of notable collections worldwide. Loretta Oleck, Window in Water. Loretta's creative work has been been published in The Stockholm Review of Literature, The Missing Slate, Obsidian Literature, Black Lawrence Press, So to Speak: Feminist Journal of Language and Art, Feminist Studies, Poetica Literary Magazine, WordRiot, among dozens of others. Her photography has been exhibited in various venues including a digital exhibit at The Louvre. Lawrence Bridges, On the Road; Tools. Lawrence is best known for work in the film and literary world. His poetry has appeared in The New Yorker, Poetry, and The Tampa Review. He has published three volumes of poetry: Horses on Drums, Flip Days, and Brownwood. As a filmmaker, he created a series of literary documentaries for the NEA’s “Big Read” initiative, which include profiles of Ray Bradbury, Amy Tan, Tobias Wolff, and Cynthia Ozick. Meggan Joy, Weep and Wail. Meggan fabricates staged imagery from the ground up, growing most of her subject matter in her garden, documenting the growth, beauty and decay. Each piece is created by assembling thousands of individual photographs of botanicals, insects and other wildlife - resulting in a final image that is bursting with life and layered with hidden details and anecdotes. Rex Maurice Oppenheimer, Primitive heart and fertile mind dancing on a tightrope of time; Snapshot; Hidden Agenda. Checkered past, lived on four continents, award-winning artist and writer. Moises Ramos, Cardinal Sins #4; Cardinal Sins #8. Moises is a Puertorican artist whose artwork has been presented in several galleries and collective art shows in the USA and abroad. Ramos has also received various awards for his mixed media, engravings and B&W photography throughout his career. Today he’s an artist and educator residing in Florida. He was the recipient of the Memphis Wood Excellence in Teaching Award and the Cultural Council of Jacksonville Art Educator of the Year Award in Jacksonville. Andrea Jones, Together Alone; Alter Ego; The Concealed Identity. For the last nine years, Andrea has worked as an art teacher in prison. Her artwork has featured in Average Art Magazine, Pikchur Magazine, Wotisart Magazine, Thought Art Magazine, Candy Floss Magazine, Envision Arts Magazine and Art Hole Magazine. Marcie Bronstein, Transpacific, Australia to Hawaii from the series "Following Seas". Marcie is a visual artist whose work has been exhibited, published, and commissioned for thirty years. From 2014-18, she traveled the world teaching creative watercolor painting to hundreds of passengers on ships. One of the personal projects that came from that experience is this series entitled "Following Seas," a


collection of watercolor paintings of maps of her journeys. Mary Kamerer, The Private Waterfall; The Pink Pot; Spring Collage; Red Sunglasses . Mary is an impressionist oil painter in Charlotte, North Carolina, painting landscapes and still lifes from her studio in Dilworth Artisan Station. You can see her work at www.marykamerer.com and visit her on Instagram @maryckamererart. Kiera Stuart, Energy Tree; The Space Between Us; Abstracted Bee. Kiera is an abstract artist inspired by nature, biology and micro macro universes. She lives and works in Brooklyn NYC and is currently in grad school at Brooklyn College. Paula Camacho, Absorbed. Paula is a Colombian-born multi-disciplinary artist currently residing in Orlando, Florida. She graduated from the University of Central Florida in the Fall of 2019 with her Bachelor of Fine Arts in Painting and a Minor in Graphic Design. Paula takes a deep interest in exploring philosophical and psychological matters via her art practice. Lane Mochow, Starry Eyed. Lane Mochow is a sophomore at Tennessee Technological university majoring in journalism. He enjoys strumming his ukulele, poetry, and hiking. Desiree Dufresne, 2020 self portrait. Desiree works as a language arts teacher in Los Angeles, CA and has received two degrees in History. She has participated in small art fairs in the Los Angeles area, and her work has been featured in several fine art publications, including Abstract: Contemporary Expressions Magazine, Deluge Literature and Arts Journal, The Raw Art Review, and Prometheus Dreaming. Her artwork is included in private art collections throughout the United States. Carrie Hunter, Edge of the Woods; Split Tree at Midnight. Carrie is an artist from Sandwich, Massachusetts, USA. She primarily paints using oil paint. Karyna Aslanova, Economy. Karyna is a multimedia artist, director and photographer, and although photography is her principle medium, Karyna also uses video, painting and illustration, as well as poetry to further her exploration into a multitude of subjects. Karyna’s photography projects often use other-worldly imagery to reflect modern social issues, with a vague but familiar base note perceptible through a haze of the strange and incongruous. Serge Lecomte, Seasons. Serge is a poet, novelist, playwright and painter. After living in Alaska for forty years, he now lives in Bellingham, WA. Website: https://sergelecomte.weebly.com Lily Olin, Untitled; Overlook. Lily is a cross-disciplinary artist and poet. Her art and poetry are driven by her emotional history, from various environments and relationships. Her practice represents the way our senses are heightened when we are involved in a relationship or engaged in a particular psychological space. Angela Dagostino, Is there anything God can not do?, Miss D.D. Cupcake and Hunter asked; really? Angela lives in California. She has participated in many exhibitions and sells her work to private collectors. Lindsay Merwin, Breath Out; Up for Air. Lindsay is an Orlando artist whose artwork is inspired by pop culture, nature, people, and animals. Cassandra Hamilton, My Left Eye After 1st Surgery. Cassandra is a disabled artist/writer with MS and loss of central vision in one eye who creates from dreams, shamanic journeys and life. Her art has displayed at The Mystic Museum of Art, Marlborough Arts Center, Cromwell Creative District, Prometheus Dreaming, The Door Opener Magazine and MUSED, a BellaOnline Literary Review. She teaches Active Dreaming (a synthesis of dreamwork and shamanism). You can view more of her work at www.beardogdreaming.com. Judy Mensch, Head 2. Judy has shown her prints throughout the U.S. and abroad. They are in collections including The New York Public Library, The New York Historical Society, Syracuse University, and Pfizer Inc., among others. She was awarded fellowships to Yaddo, the Ucross Foundation, Art Print Residence, and Centrum voor Grafiek Frans Masereel, and was awarded a grant in Japanese woodblock printing from Art Quest, the Nagasawa Art Park Pilot Project, in Awajishima, Japan.



Contents 0 2 A tr i p to th e bear 's en cl osu r e A n d r es Cor d oba 0 4 T h e Ri n g Ken t W i tten bu r g 0 5 i n w ater A n i a Cath er i n e 0 6 M or e D en d r ol ogy Jam es D u cat 0 8 Fl ood i n g | Fl oati n g | Fad i n g D en n a B er g 0 9 T h e W ay W est Patr i ck T . Rear d on 10 Su m m er ! Ch al l en ge i n cl u d i n g Gl or i a H ef f er n an , B . L . M ak i ef sk y an d L esl ey H eber t 18 Fr i d ay th e 13th San d r a Casti รงo 20 W e Sp eak Pr op er M i ch ael Ch av i n d a 22 M u r d er at th e Secr et Ri ver B . H . Pi t t 24 N ot al l ow ed to l et i t sh ow C. Gay l e 26 Som eth i n g B or r ow ed M ol ly Keegan 28 Ch i l d h ood Ph otogr ap h B abi th a M ar i n a Ju st i n 29 Bay W i n d ow s Fr an k Gu er r an d en o 30

M on ster s B r en n an B ar n ey

32 Say i n g good by e d u r i n g a p an d em i c Josep h i n e B l ai r 33 Bi om es M el i ssa L aD u c 42 At an A .A . M eeti n g i n East B oston M al i k Sel l e 44 T h e D eser t or T h e B ay M al i k Sel l e 46 K i n tsu gi M er esh ah M er y bal 48

T h e State of th e W or l d L en a Rosi n g

52

W ater i s th e D r i v i n g For ce of al l N at u r e El ean or Sw an son

55

Fr esh ly B aked B r ead Ph y l i ss M er i on Sh an ken

60

H ol d i n g H an d s W ad e Gr ei ten

62

T h ey Say Rach el N ol an

64

cl u tch i n g at l ove Gr ace Cl ai r e

65

Keep sake # 5 L eah H ol br ook Sacket t

68

Beau ty T i p s, T r i ck s & H ack s B eth M cCoy

69

Go Rabi d Fai th Cassan d r a M oss

74

Col l ecti ve I n h al e Sar a Gr i m es

75

am bly op i a K ay l a Fr an ces M u r r ay

78

A n A p p ar atu s f or th e A f ter m ath M aggi e Gal e

80

W el l - f ed L oi sa Fen i ch el l

Beyond Words I nternational Literary M agazine