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Sending casual text messages have been a huge part of the adult dating ritual, and a lot of dating experts have theorized that texting has surpassed actual phone calls when it comes to a couple’s means of communication. So it’s not surprising if you find yourself having that itchy texting trigger finger or thumbs, rather when heavily involved with a new love. However, you must all beware: There is such a thing as too much text messaging. Overdoing it can freak guys out, because they are pressured to send an immediate response.

There are a few times when texting can shoot down an adult dating relationship before it can barely take off.

• After the first few dates It can be tempting to touch base with a guy after a fantastic date, but you should fight the urge because reaching out early in the game eliminates the thrill of the chase for him.

• When drunk Since phones don’t come with a breathalyzer app, it’s up to you to stop yourself from drunk texting, especially if it involves messages of wanting to meet up ASAP. Letting him know you’re too available gives a guy all the leverage.

• When mad It can be annoying when a guy becomes unreliable, but sending a “Why haven’t I heard from you yet?!” message can make you look profoundly insecure. Refrain from sending angry text messages once you’re in an adult dating relationship too. When things are put into writing, it’s hard to take them back. It’s even prudent to restrict catty humor, which can sound a lot meaner than it really is.

• When trying to be funny Nonverbal delivery of sarcasm and jokes can sound aggressive. A guy could read a text like “Wow, you were totally out of control last night” and take it literally, which makes you seem angry when you’re just fondly letting him know how you liked his funny behavior the night


• When you’ve already texted him that day Once you’re in an ongoing adult dating relationship, you may be inclined to use texting as a regular means of communication, which is fine sometimes. But electronic means of communication can hinder phone conversations and actual quality time. And guys generally like short updates, not a detailed account of what’s currently going on in your life.

Times When You Should Not Text in an Adult Dating Relationship