Ben Kahn Emre Koyuncu English 106 22 February 2012 Cover Letter I did many things to revise my essay on Timothy Treadwell. Overall the essay was already pretty good. There were just a few bigger things that needed to be revised. First I changed my thesis statement. I my original essay I forgot to include one of my main points in the thesis. In the essay I talked about Treadwell's need to escape from relationship problems. I added this to my thesis so it would encompass all of my topic sentences. Other changes I made were fixing my works cited page as well as changing some in text citations. I had forgotten to add the page numbers for some of the citations. All the other revisions were minor changes. I went through improved sentences that were worded badly. I also had a lot of tense issues, so I corrected all of those errors as well. All of these changes really cleaned up my essay. My photo essay was already pretty good. There were only two major changes I needed to make. One was adding a interesting title to the project. I did that by adding a creative alliteration "Surviving the Cramped Quarters of Cary Quad". The other thing I needed to do was make all of the canvases that same size. But I'm not that greatest at Photoshop and I'll the pictures were different orientations. I kept trying to make the pages look good with the photos that I had, but I couldn't get it to work. Therefore I didn't revise this aspect of my photo story. I did minor this to help clean up the rest of the project. By improving captions as well as correcting grammar errors in my paragraphs, I think my project is much improved.